Overcomers Approach

Empowering conversation with Amy Lenius on embracing self-worth, aligning health, and leveraging women's natural rhythms for personal growth

• Nichol Ellis-McGregor • Season 5 • Episode 5

Share episode

Discover how understanding your self-worth can lead to extraordinary personal growth in our conversation with Amy Lenius, director of group coaching at Next Level University. Journey with Amy and I as she shares her transition from anatomy and physiology to becoming a holistic improvement coach, where she now helps individuals align their mental and physical health. Amy reveals the critical role of self-belief and addresses the unique barriers women face in achieving alignment. Her insights offer a roadmap to sustainable change and a richer, more balanced life.

Another key topic raised is the impact of hormonal cycles on women’s well-being. Amy draws a relatable analogy comparing men’s hormonal cycles—essentially daily fluctuations—to women’s more complex, extended cycles. She articulates how women can harness these natural rhythms to optimize their productivity and mental clarity rather than fall into the traps of shame associated with lower energy periods. Such awareness can be liberating and serve as a strategic advantage in both personal and professional realms.

Moreover, the concept of fulfillment versus superficial happiness is powerfully articulated. Listeners are reminded that true fulfillment is often found in making hard choices that may bring discomfort but ultimately lead to growth and reward. The thoughtful discussion culminates in a profound understanding that self-care is essential not just for personal well-being but also as an act of discipline crucial for sustaining various roles in life.

Empowering women to embrace the natural rhythms of their bodies, she provides practical advice on assessing hormone levels and leveraging these insights for personal fulfillment. Join us as we explore the power of community and self-investment, with resources like free connection calls and a vibrant Facebook community at Next Level University, which help foster self-awareness and growth. This episode is a testament to the rippling effects of valuing oneself, extending to families, businesses and communities alike.

More about Amy at https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/group-coaching/

Thank you for listening and sharing!!



Nichol Ellis-McGregor, MHS | LinkedIn

Facebook

Mrs. Nichol (@mrs.nichol_7) | TikTok

Nichol Ellis-McGregor (@mrs_nichol) • Instagram photos and videos

HOME | Nichol-Empowerment Life Coach (nicholkellis-mcgregor.com)

Thank you for listening!

Speaker 1:

Good day everyone. This is Nicole Ellis McGregor, the founder of the Overcomers Approach podcast, where we speak with people from different walks of life, different experiences, different journeys, but the overarching goal is to really get to the next level, to really know what our self-worth is, to know what our purpose is and how we get stuck. And I'm so happy to have Amy Lenius here today. She is the director of the group coaching at Next Level University professional speaker, event coordinator, mc and Next Level certified holistic improvement coach. I know she has her own journey and own lived experience that I would love to just touch base on while we have this organic conversation. We're just going to let it flow here today. But, amy, I want to start by saying how did you get in this field? How did you get to where you're at today? What journey got you here?

Speaker 2:

Oh, thank you. Thank you so much for that introduction. I loved your use of next level and self-worth. That's so exciting. I can't wait to dive into that.

Speaker 2:

So, of all those things that you just listed that I do. I obviously didn't start out there. I have a background in anatomy and physiology, actually, and I fell in love with science and how the human body works and also struggled with my own health journey. The combination of those two things and doing what I needed to do and learning what I needed to learn to become pain-free, to become healthy and not only healthy but thriving was its own just beautiful journey, and that took me into helping other women, helping them with their hormones speaking into their lives, and I had a presentation called holistic healing for your hormones. That was my biggest one, most popular one that I used to do. But even as I was up there on stage giving these presentations and things there there, I quickly noticed that there was a difference between looking and sounding good and actually being good and being able to actually speak into these people's lives where they're empowered enough to go home and make change. Yes, and those are two different things. I can go up there and spout fancy anatomy words and tell you about your body and how it works and why it's important to work with it and all of these other things, but if you don't have the level of self belief, that it takes, where you can look at something and be like okay, I now believe it's possible because I'm looking at amy on stage here, but I don't believe it's possible for myself yes I don't know if it's going to be worth it yes

Speaker 2:

and so that's where self-belief comes into the journey. When you look back in hindsight of how my journey was able to be so successful, I had a good level of self-belief, and then there was also this component of self-worth that wasn't addressing enough for women to be able to take what I gave them home and apply it consistently for the rest of their days if they wanted to. And so, at the end of the day, if we don't believe it's possible, possible for us or that it's going to be worth it, we're going to find a way to not do it anymore. Have low self-worth, we're going to find a reason to actually not feel worthy enough for the results that we're working towards. And so I learned that those were two really important pillars and something that I was missing as I was speaking into these women's lives, because I was talking a lot about mental health, about stress and all of these other beautiful things. But, learning now as I have and looking back, those were definitely two pieces I was missing to help empower them and help them believe that they could do it for themselves.

Speaker 2:

And so I ended up partnering with Next Level University, kevin Allen. They're amazing. They created this whole beautiful company and it was all holistic self-improvement, which the word holistic just drew me in right there I'm like, oh, I'm going to love what these guys have to say, because I also don't believe that one thing is one thing. Holistic means everything affects everything else.

Speaker 2:

So if you think your financial goals and success and career don't affect your personal life and vice versa. You're setting yourself up for a bit of failure If you don't believe that your inside environment affects your external environment or vice versa. You're also playing this losing game. And so holistic became a really powerful word in my vocabulary and something I learned to live by. And so holistic became a really powerful word in my vocabulary and something I learned to live by. And partnering with them initially came on. They wanted me to be their emcee for their live event because I was a public speaker. And then I came in and they asked me to help with group coaching and all these other things. And now I just live and breathe working with these two guys.

Speaker 1:

Awesome. That is so great to hear. I know I interviewed Alan once and he's amazing, has an amazing story and just so impactful and so powerful and I just love the fact. You know his passion, his energy, his charisma and he's still humble, you know, and just from my short brief experience with him during that period, it was just so wonderful and it was when I was just getting started with podcasting and he really spoke some really positive things to me. So you're in a good space, aligned with a good person, and so that is so, so, so great to hear. So I'm happy to hear that.

Speaker 1:

Tell me, how do people cause to get into alignment, you know, with your self-worth and self-belief, and it's, it's really like. I love the fact that you said it's holistic. You know it really. There has to be some type of balance there, because if you're going to do really well in one area, you know it really it's like a domino effect. It affects other areas negatively or positively. What do you think gets in the way of people even being in alignment? What's a barrier that women have to overcome and I know this, I'm sure hormones. We could talk about that as well, how that falls in line with this because it's all interconnected and it's all integrated and it's tied together. So I get that piece. But what do you think is like a blockage for alignment?

Speaker 2:

Oh, my goodness, how much time do we have? It's a combination. So when you talk about alignment, alignment is a combination of our core values, core aspirations and core beliefs. Yes, those are three really powerful components to whether we feel if we're in alignment or not. It's kind of like past, present and future. Our core values typically come from our past. It's something we uncover as we do this work, because they're already there. Typically, core aspirations are where we want to go. That's like future pacing thinking. These are the aligned goals that I have, based that on the beliefs I have now. And where we can get muddled is the beliefs. So tapping into what your core values are is amazing because it gives you the start of the roadmap of where you're actually going to feel fulfilled and find joy and all of these things. But the belief is where you can get tripped up. If you have misguided beliefs for the aspirations that you have, you're going to kind of go off the rails a little bit.

Speaker 2:

You're not going to be able to achieve this desire of yours. And so all of those things being in alignment is really powerful, because then you see that through your effort you find fulfillment through all of these things, because it is so aligned and so understanding, I think, your core values. It's such a powerful thing to uncover and discover about yourself, because then you're starting with a true self-awareness foundation and then, when you look at your goals, it's so important to look back at your beliefs. I touched on this right in the beginning is do I believe it's possible? Do I believe it's possible for me Because those are very two different answers and do I believe it's going to be worth what it takes for me to get there?

Speaker 2:

And then we go into core aspirations, because if we have this thing of oh I want to be healthy and fit, but we have this underlying belief that that's not possible for us, we're going to find a way to self-sabotage and make sure that that doesn't happen. So true, yeah, self-belief is a really important pillar for any kind of success journey we're looking for, whether it be health, finances, relationships, anything like that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I love that you said that and I love the fact that something that stood out for me. Do we? It's going to take something to get to that next point, so do we? Sometimes what it takes can get us caught up Like cause. I for me, just very transparent. I could you know. I know what my core values are not my beliefs are, but when I think about the work that needs to be put in, or the patience or the endurance or the resilience, that's where I can self-sabotage, or other people do. How do getting overwhelmed with what kind of what it's going to take to get there, because it's going to take some discipline and some grit and what can people do to get over that little piece right there? What are your thoughts on that?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, if you're overwhelmed and everything is in alignment and it's what you want and it's what you believe in and it aligns with your core values, but you're still finding a sense of overwhelm or self-sabotage. That's where the levels of self-belief and self-worth can come into play. And so self-belief and self-worth, they're very two different things. So self-belief is what I believe I am capable of accomplishing in the external world. Do I believe I'm capable of this thing? And that level varies per thing. Some of things that we do in life we have really high self-belief and high certainty, and in others we have really low because we don't have the proof to back it up yet. And then self-worth is how we feel on the inside about ourselves, the level of worth we have on the inside. And it's so easy to say, oh, I absolutely have self-worth and value myself, because, of course, who would say anything else? That's logically what we would say. But deep down in the back of your brain, the accurate point of self-awareness is always going to trip you up.

Speaker 2:

For sure, and then sometimes, if it's overwhelmed, we have to lean into the power of consistency and sustainability, and so sometimes, when we're overwhelmed, it's because we've taken off a bite that's bigger than we can chew, and that doesn't mean this whole journey is not for us. How often do we do that? Oh, it's too hard, it's so overwhelming. This must not be for me. You just got to break it down a little more. If it's overwhelming, it's not sustainable, and if it's not sustainable, you cannot leverage the compound effect and you're going to find ways to go off the rails.

Speaker 1:

That was amazing, that was awesome and, like you said, that feeling of overwhelmness and just having to kind of reset ourselves and regroup to get back on track, because I think we're born with everything, all the solutions we need within us, like they're there but really just getting tapping into that. And then you know, like you said, maybe we bit off more than we could chew. That means we may need to break it down or we may need to regroup and reset and kind of reevaluate and say, hey, maybe I need to do these three steps or what is that? What does that look like? What would you suggest? When people are at that space, they know it's completely possible, they know their gifts and talents, their purpose, but it's in that space where they really got to regroup, because they did bite, took off more than they could chew.

Speaker 2:

But yet they're called to this thing for a reason Exactly, definitely. So again, have you set yourself up for success.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

I think what happens is we kind of live in this space of toxic positivity, almost in the world where it's like if your goals aren't big enough and scare you, then they're not even good, and if you can't do a hundred things before you even start your day, you suck and it's like I don't know Right. I mean, it sounds exciting, but is it real? Is that how that works? I don't think so personally, especially you. Again, lifestyles are all so different. I'm a homeschooling mom of two boys who also is an entrepreneur in this beautiful company now Lexington Mill Nation and all of these things. So you have to look at your personal lifestyle. What is going to actually work for you? Are you comparing to someone who is in their early twenties with no kids, lives in the city and does whatever they want with their own time? Or are you comparing to someone who maybe has a similar lifestyle to you?

Speaker 2:

Like me who homeschools my children and lives on a dirt road next to nothing. I think comparison is a very important pillar of self-worth.

Speaker 1:

Exactly.

Speaker 2:

We can be inspired through comparison or we can use it to our detriment. Exactly One of the key components to building self-worth is apples to apples comparison, not comparing to someone who has an entirely different lifestyle than you.

Speaker 1:

That's a great perspective to put that in. I think, when you're more connected to someone who's doing something similar than you or that you aspire to do, really taking a look at, like you know what is very different, what's the situation for them, what are the circumstances, I think the analogy you stated someone in their 20s that has way more time than you, you know has, you know maybe can structure their day differently. But when you have two children that you homeschool, that takes discipline and structure and really great good time management, you know, and then to be you know in your purpose and in your lane and doing you know what you were called to do and so, like you said, more so compared apple to the apples versus you know oranges to apples, because that's going to be more realistic in the you know for yourself and in the long run, and then I don't think people will get so caught up in their heads about where they should or need to be.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, learn to develop the skill to create your own filters of what people are saying. Because someone says something that might not apply to your exact lifestyle, don't make that wrong for them saying that. Run it through your own filter. Well, I like what they have to say and I do feel called to having this kind of schedule, this kind of lifestyle, this kind of but run it through the filter of the reality of your life. Yes, is this person a parent? Put it through the parent filter. If you're not a parent and you are right, how do I run that filter through?

Speaker 2:

by taking what makes sense to me and then being empowered enough to make that work for my life and what makes sense to me, and then being empowered enough to make that work for my life and what makes sense for me. Those little things are going to help build self-worth.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

I love that and that is so helpful, which leads me to my next question, which is I love the fact that you touched on hormones and I know that hormones can impact us as women in different stages and different experiences throughout our life, and once we become more aware of that and understand it more and become more educated and empowered, I believe we can really really stretch ourselves to where we need to be and go. How do hormones impact us as women? How does this fall in alignment with where we need to be in our goals and purpose and the holistic perspective?

Speaker 2:

So much, yes, and we can take that from so many angles. So how do hormones affect our lives Literally every minute of every day? Yes, as women. And so even there, let's bring it, let's tie it into comparison. So, if you see this very successful man who's doing all of these things and has all this energy and all of this stuff, and you're like, ah, I want to be like that. Like darn it, you know, and it's like people already. You're not comparing apples to apples.

Speaker 1:

That's right.

Speaker 2:

If you want to zoom out to just this beautiful macro look of hormones. Men are like the sun they go through a cycle every 24 hours. We also have a cycle, but we're like the moon we're slightly different every day. That 24 hour cycle they go through ours has some different hormones, but it's stretched out for 26 to 34 days. You are an entirely different being, especially when you look at it week to week. We're not setting ourselves up for success to not understand that.

Speaker 2:

I can't tell you how many women I work with who get into so much shame and guilt because they don't understand that they're different every week. Oh, last week I was on fire. I was crushing my workouts, my task list was done, I felt good, I looked great and this week I'm a potato and I can't function and then it's like what's wrong with me? Why can't I be like last week all the time? Because you can't. You're not physically, mentally and emotionally set up for success during certain times of your cycle.

Speaker 2:

And so that doesn't mean we can stop or have to stop doing what we're doing during certain seasons. It's more a matter of awareness and grace and acceptance. So last week I was on a podcast and I was in my natural low energy season. So during your period it's like winter, yeah, and you're introspective, you're not as social, your face isn't as symmetrical. You're going through all this stuff. I'm not as primed to set up and speak. I'm not even as articulate during that season I showed up for the podcast anyways yeah, but I'm not going to compare today's podcast, where I'm in my inner summer.

Speaker 2:

I'm feeling good. My face is more symmetrical, I have more energy. I'm more articulate today than I was last week. They're met with acceptance instead of shame and guilt. And even that, learning those types of things and learning to leverage when you're more creative versus when you're more productive versus when you're more introspective it's such a superpower that women can tap into.

Speaker 1:

I love the fact that you said that it's a superpower and it's something that I'm sure that all women that are listening could relate to I can definitely relate to. And then getting in that space of shame, like because I've had it where. That week I was at that meeting. I was like I was flying. It was good, you know, I felt good. It was, the energy was flowing, everybody was just like I went to court in the meeting and it was just so. It was, the synergy was awesome.

Speaker 1:

I come in there next week and I'm introspective. I have to kind of push myself and stretch myself to engage um, I probably don't feel the best, like you said, and all those things come into play and then you get in your head and it's like it's shame. You know I didn't perform on the level that I probably should ever could have. That you know you're in your head about. Did I say enough, um?

Speaker 1:

But I love the fact that you said we could use it as a superpower and that when we get into the stage of acceptance, like accept the space that you're in and use it to leverage yourself in whatever space that you're in, you know, and and I love that because I think we, as women, get in our heads and because we, we, we kind of, we are kind of set up where we're at now to be like super women, sometimes're like we can do it all, say it all, bring it on and then, once we hit that you know low point, it's like I'm done, I'm just, I crashed out. You know, and the good thing about if we do crash out, that just means we're setting ourself to hit the peak again, you know. So I definitely love that. It's something that I could definitely relate to. What do you suggest for women who want to know where their hormones are at? Where would they even start to even get like an assessment or what, what, what does that look like?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, there's, I mean, so many different modalities of doctors and things you can go to if you want, like physical hormone testing, depending like I'm in Canada. So, it's more challenging to go to just a regular doctor and be like hey, I'd love my hormones tested. They're like oh you're fine and the spectrum in which they test is is too broad to give you a good look. Most of the time not all doctors, I don't want to put that into a box.

Speaker 2:

But my experience, that's the experience. But you can go and find other kinds of doctors too. There's naturopaths. There's incredible different types of practitioners who will go on this journey with you and dive in and help you with anything If you like more natural. They're going to help you with herbs and supplements and things, and vice versa. But there's also just so much online now.

Speaker 2:

So many women are stepping into this and I just love seeing it so much. And so there's all that information. And then into this, and I just love seeing it so much, and so there's all that information and there's just really powerful books. One of my favorites it's called Hormone Intelligence. It's called Hormone Intelligence. It's excellent. Gives you a good, well-rounded look. And then the other one In the Flow, it's called that's a pretty decent one as well. Those two are really really good.

Speaker 1:

Okay, there was Hormone Intelligence and In the Flow, right, okay, I'm going to make sure I note those in the description of the podcast, because I think education and knowledge is empowerment and when we apply it it just takes us even further. So I appreciate that. I'm going to wind down to my next two questions and then we'll pretty much wrap it up. How, why do you think fulfillment is important in our lives, like?

Speaker 2:

yeah, fulfillment is important because it's something that's deeper than superficial happiness and pleasure. Yes, wow, fulfillment isn't. Some people hear fulfillment and they're like, oh, it's the happy, easy choice. Right, it's not. Fulfillment actually comes from a lot of hard choices, but meaningful ones.

Speaker 1:

I have to say that again. You said it comes from a lot of hard choices.

Speaker 2:

Yes, we're constantly just going with happiness and pleasure. It's a very superficial thing. So new shoes make me happy Absolutely. Ice cream in front of Netflix brings me pleasure Absolutely, but if I were doing that all the time, would I have a meaningful and fulfilling life? So true, they're very different. Yes, they're components. It's important to have happiness, pleasure, joy, quality of life. Quality of life is a huge part of fulfillment. But even quality of life, that's challenging sometimes. To make a healthier choice to work out and move your body every day, that's a challenging choice. But I am more fulfilled when I choose to do my workout, especially when I didn't want to and I did it. It anyways. I will be happy and in pleasure if I skip my workout and hit the Ben and Jerry's and watch Netflix Super happy. But am I fulfilled? Yeah, very different.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I love the fact that you made that clear delineation between you know happiness and fulfillment and I think sometimes the messaging that we get you know, whether it's through marketing or or just you know happiness and fulfillment and I think sometimes the messaging that we get you know, whether it's through marketing or or just you know certain things, information we take in, you know, I think we happen to see a lot of you know some, a lot of happiness, that goes on, but I don't think people really understand and know what people had to go through to even get to that space of fulfillment. You know it took some sacrifice, it meant some some really hard choices to really sit down and assess and probably be self-aware of. You know, how do I get to this next phase of like having fulfillment? You know, and I think it goes back to the holistic approach that you, that you stated, because that ultimately, if we decide to do the workout, if we decide, hey, we're only going to do Ben and Jerry's twice a month, and we get these workouts in and put in the work and we put some skin in the game, then in the long run we're going to have better quality of life.

Speaker 1:

We both have children. You know we want to be there for our children. Ultimately, one day grandchildren I have grandchildren. I, you know I want to see the legacy continue on. So I, you know I understand exactly what you said about fulfillment. So that really resonates with really like my core value and I know that that's something I want my listeners to really get to understand that sometimes those uncomfortable spaces and places and hard decisions, it's okay because it's a part of life and it's a part of the journey, but it's definitely going to get us to the next level, the highest level, or where we're on the journey that we need to go, that we're meant to be on. So I love the fact that you said fulfillment. One last question why is self-care important? I mean sustainability. I feel like they're interconnected. Why do you think those are important and how do people can take time to discipline themselves, to even just incorporate it into their day or their lifestyle?

Speaker 2:

Definitely we can bring this back to, like you said, sustainability and the overwhelm. Let's tie it into that.

Speaker 2:

So, self-care is so important because if you picture yourself as someone who I mean no, you don't even have to picture just picture who you are and all the different hats that you wear, because I guarantee, if you're listening to this, you have a bunch of different hats that you wear. You want to grow, you want to thrive. You're doing all of these things right. You're only listening to podcasts like this if you have those kinds of ambitions and joys, so you are one of those people with. You know how they hold the sticks, and there's the spinning plates.

Speaker 1:

Yes, this is where.

Speaker 2:

I show people that balance is BS and we need to stop chasing it. We cannot find balance. We have to stop looking for it. Oh, if I could just have work-life balance. You can't.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

I could just have balance states that we can be equal in all things all at once. Yeah, well, right there, you're setting yourself up for overwhelming failure because you can't equally be all things at once. And so picture all of the things that you do, the people you pour into, the hats that you wear, as all of those plates. So, this morning, working with my children, being with my children, doing their schooling with them, connecting with them, that's me spinning and giving momentum and love and quality time to my family, my children's plate. Well, now I'm over here. I'm over here in my passion, my purpose, my contribution to the world, and now I'm spinning this plate. I can move to this plate, trusting that this plate has momentum and will keep spinning until I go back.

Speaker 2:

And I'm going to move over here and I'm going to give this one momentum later my husband's home from work. All all of us are going to get together and relax and hang out. That's that's family time plate. Right? You have all these plates now to bring in self-care and overwhelm the self-care. Well, who's spinning the plates? If you fall, all of those plates fall, that's right. That's why we need to take care of ourselves. It's so important.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

And I think we get spoken into where we need it to be this elaborate thing, when in reality it's something that you need to do that's small for yourself, a few times every day.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

However that looks, it's intention. The tea I make in the morning is intention. It's not just a hot cup of tea. It's what mug, what tea, what herb, what, why? And I'm going to have this moment for myself with my hot cup of tea. There's an intention there. The overwhelm allow some plates to be plastic. If they fall, they will bounce and you can pick them up later.

Speaker 1:

That is good yeah.

Speaker 2:

Glass plates, have three to five glass plates that you pour into you and you love and you give momentum to you. You flow, you harmony in and out. You don't have balance, cause that's a BS and then allow the other plates to fall if they need to, and you can pick them up later.

Speaker 1:

That is good. That is amazing. That is amazing. Amy, I just want to thank you for being present today for my podcast. I so appreciate it. You gave incredible nuggets for us to move forward in our lives and just continue to pursue. If my listeners want to get in touch with you, what is your website link that they can go to? Maybe use your coaching services or consulting or speaking? What web link would they go to in order to find you?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, personally, I just love Instagram or Facebook. It's just at Amy Lanius, message me, dm me anytime. I do free connection calls if you want to learn how to go through the frameworks of building self-worth and self-belief. But we also at Next Level University, we have a free Facebook community where it's just daily self-awareness, daily growth, daily questions, and it's just a community full of people who, like you, want to grow and thrive and do more, while having permission to struggle along the way. That's right, genuinely.

Speaker 1:

I love it. I love the fact that you gave some opportunities for people to connect in different ways and there's some initial free services as well to start with, you know, just to get started, to step out, to invest in ourselves. I mean, investing ourselves is just so critical and it's just so important and the more we connect and build and invest in what is the most important thing, which is ourselves, then we could take ourselves and our families and our communities whatever that looks like, whatever's personal for you to that next level. Amy, I just want to thank you for being here today. I so appreciate you. I'll make sure that I have your description in my podcast description and it has truly been amazing. Thank you, Amy. I so appreciate you.

Speaker 2:

I appreciate you. Thank you so much for having me and for everything you're putting out into the world.

Speaker 1:

Thank you very much, you as well.