Overcomers Approach

From Bartender, Nun to End-of-Life Doula: Gina's Journey of Healing

• Nichol Ellis-McGregor • Season 5 • Episode 12

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Join us for an emotional and uplifting episode featuring Gina Econopopoulos, who candidly shares her journey through personal tragedies, overcoming addiction, and ultimately finding her purpose as an end-of-life doula. From her early life in a supportive but chaotic family to grappling with insecurities and alcohol dependence, Gina's path was anything but linear. After losing her beloved mother to cancer and later her fiancé to alcoholism, Gina grappled with deep grief and questions about faith.

In a profound turn of events, she turned her pain into purpose, guiding others through their final moments with compassion and dignity. Discover how Gina learned to embrace life’s challenges and the importance of being present for those nearing the end of their journeys. This heartwarming episode encourages deep reflection on themes of love, loss, and the transformative power of faith and community. Listen in as Gina offers insights into her experiences, reminding us all of the beauty and strength found in vulnerability.

Now, as an end-of-life doula, Gina gives her experiences and compassion into helping others navigate their final transition with dignity. She shares her insights on the importance of presence, both for individuals approaching the end of life and for their families. Through prayer, understanding, and the simplicity of sharing moments together, Gina assists those in their final chapter, often dispelling the fear that surrounds death. Her approach is grounded in the belief that embracing the end of life can be as significant as celebrating new beginnings.

Gina’s transformation is not just about overcoming her past; it’s a tribute to the power of community, faith, and self-acceptance. In times of adversity, her lessons about love, loss, and finding one’s purpose resonate deeply, reminding us all that there is hope and healing even in the darkest moments. The episode ends on a note of empowerment, encouraging listeners to explore their own paths to recovery, to confront the difficulties in their lives, and to seek love and acceptance, both from themselves and others. Emphasizing that healing is a continuous journey, Gina’s story exemplifies the fearless embrace of change and the belief that each day presents an opportunity for growth.

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Speaker 1:

Good day everyone. This is Nicole Ellis McGregor, the founder of the Overcomers Approach podcast, where I meet with people from different walks of life, different experiences, on different journeys, and I'm so happy that I have Gina Econopopoulos If I pronounced it wrong, I apologize here and she has an amazing story, an amazing journey that I'm looking forward to sharing with everyone. An amazing journey that I'm looking forward to sharing with everyone. Gina was born in New York to a strong Italian and Greek loving family. She graduated from Eastern Connecticut State University and bartended before embarking on a 12-year journey. After her mother's passing, she settled in the New Jersey shore and Gina now works as an end-of-life doula, extending her compassionate heart to those in their final chapter. She found solace and sobriety as a proud alcoholic anonymous member, and her story of resilient through tragedy and faith inspires others to face life challenges. You know that is a lot of information, empowering information Wherever you want to start. I know that faith was a part of this journey, for sure, wherever you want to start, but let's just go for it. Thank you.

Speaker 2:

Well, first of all, nicole, thank you for having me. I do appreciate you and to all the listeners, and yes, I always say it's my story and it's not fake news, it's real, it's true.

Speaker 2:

Been through it every path in life. But everything I went through is who I am today Because, boy, I overcame a lot, without even me realizing I had overcome it. It was just persevering, walking, being Carrie. But anyhow, I will start because I grew up in New York, long Island. I'm one of eight kids.

Speaker 2:

Great childhood Parents were very loving family, loving, unconditional love. My dad put us all through college and there was no problem. But yet I was born the seventh child and I was born with a lot of physical problems. I was born so right off the get-go. I was born with a hip dislocation and then I've had surgeries and so as a kid I got used to it. You know, I got used to being in the hospital, I got used to like okay.

Speaker 2:

But at the same time as a kid I grew in this insecurity with myself. Like I compared myself to my siblings. Look at them. They're very athletic, they're beautiful, they're tall, they're blonde, whatever. They got boyfriends and here's his little Gina. You know, gina, little Bridget or that just had many situations, many challenges as a child, but yet my mother and my dad was always there for me. Through it all Like car accidents, you name it I always felt like if anything's going to happen, it'll happen to Gina. Give it to Gina, you know, give it to me as a kid.

Speaker 2:

So I developed that identity for myself and in that it was insecurity. I did not like myself. I felt very looking for love, like I wasn't comfortable with myself. So I would, you know, jump from one place to another. I was seeking for love in all the wrong places because I thought that was it. You know, that was it. I was raised Catholic, but yet I went to church, received all my sacraments, but as a child I did not have a relationship with God, higher power, whoever, a spiritual relationship. So I just kind of like I went through with a great smile. I always smile, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

Yes, another surgery. Okay, no problem, I know what to do. I'll tell the doctors what to do.

Speaker 2:

You know I got to a point. But I did go to college. But I would have to back up. My mother would say, well, thank God, you could walk, you know. Thank God, and I could, you know I was able to walk and other things. Where people are disabled, you know they couldn't walk. So that's, I did learn that and so I did go to college. I went to a way school, connecticut, eastern Connecticut. I just wanted to have fun. Was there a degree in fun? I don't know. That was me, I was looking for it. I did not want to go to a big school so I had to study. I wanted to go to a small school to have fun.

Speaker 2:

And I did. I guess, whichever college I mean, I'll speak for myself. That's what I thought everyone would do.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

And so I did. I went to college. Everybody loved me. Once again I'm trying to fit in to different places and that's where my drinking escalated because it was like, okay, I'll be at the bar and and everybody's going to love me. You know being the center of attention and you know trying to. You know attract a guy whatever, you know the right guy, and it was just so. That's what I did and I learned. I took the, I got the degree in social work. I study because by nature I do have a heart of service. Yes, caring person Like I will talk to anyone. You know, back then Still do. And then, but then, yet I also developed a skill in shooting pool. I became a pool shark. So I was mostly at the bars in my college, shooting, winning, not paying for a drink and running the tables. So that was my life. That was it.

Speaker 2:

And now I kind of back up because maybe in my mid teens or you know, everyone says what do you want to do? What I wanted to do was get married, by the time I was 18, to my kids when I'm 25. Because I grew up in a great family, with my parents loving each other and raising eight kids, my mother being a house wife and mother and everything like that. I was like, wow, my dad was a hardworking and so I was like, yeah, I don't mind being like, you know, being like that, but I never met a guy, never fell in love. I thought I did, but it was all in the wrong places.

Speaker 2:

And so by the time I graduated from college, my parents retired and moved to Pennsylvania where the best option for me after college was to go live back with my mom and dad. Option for me after college was to go live back with my mom and dad. Now, mind you, my mother had my brother when she was 49 years old, so when they retired and when I graduated, my brother was like still 13 years old, so they couldn't do a full retirement because my parents were in their 60s but they still had a child to raise. So I did Best option. What do I do? Get a job.

Speaker 1:

Social work Easy right.

Speaker 2:

You go into the human resources, you try to get a state job, a 9-to-5 job, and that's it. But no, what does Gina do? She gets a job bartending. That's what I do, and bartending was going to be my temporary job. But the more money I was making, I was helping people, I was listening to their problems, I maybe sharing my opinion or suggestions or whatever, but then they would leave and I would take their money and I wouldn't have to deal with paperwork no paperwork for Gina. So I ended up really bartending and everybody loved me.

Speaker 2:

Personality plus, all you did was talk to people, talk, talk, talk, talk plus all you did was talk to people, talk, talk, talk, talk. And also I was very comfortable around that surroundings of alcohol and being the bars, like I was in college and, and I guess I was trying to hold on to that identity. Yes, but also I was empty on the inside. I'm at that time, you know, just empty, searching and and so, uh, but during that time, when I was 23, bartending, I'm thinking, okay, I need to get a kind of like a real job. So, uh, I had, um, I sent out applications, I decided to be a cruise line yeah, okay on the cruise ship.

Speaker 2:

You're having fun, fun, fun being a fun. That's it, that's my, and I'll meet my Prince Charming on the cruise like the love boat.

Speaker 1:

Yay, this is it.

Speaker 2:

And so I really and I love to travel and I say, well, this is it, this is what I could do. During, as I'm doing, the process of applying, my mom, who I love dearly, was diagnosed with cancer. Uh, she was, uh, given she was diagnosed terminally, terminally ill, given four to six months to live, okay, and and she was diagnosed with bone cancer. So, uh, I didn't think twice, I was was like, okay, put the, put those uh, cruz, you know applications aside and I'm going to take care of my mom, be there with my mom, she's going to heal, she's good.

Speaker 2:

She's not going to die Cause I didn't know what death was. I didn't know what terminally illness meant, didn't really know what cancer was, but yet my dad and I took care of her and we watched her, I watched her suffer.

Speaker 2:

I didn't have a still, I didn't have a relationship with God, I didn't have a faith. But yet, as we all know, when something tragic happens in one life, you go back to church, you turn to God, that's right. You pray the rosary, whatever, no veners, as my mother takes out her rosary out, and my parents were very devout, they were very devout Catholics and so I was like, okay, this is it, I'm going back to church, going back to confession, whatever I need to do. Okay, god, if I pray an arrow, father, mom's healed. Well, that was my mom's story. She died, she did, she ended up dying in five months and of course I was angry. Of course I'm like God. Why, how?

Speaker 1:

could this?

Speaker 2:

happen.

Speaker 1:

I mean I did everything.

Speaker 2:

I did everything and my mom, I have to say, died very gracefully because you know she never complained, she had pain and all she kept worrying is about the cobwebs in the corner when people came to visit her.

Speaker 1:

I don't care.

Speaker 2:

But that's a sense of how I was raised with my mom and she did have a beautiful death. But yet now I see it. Back then I was holding on.

Speaker 2:

I was about 23 years old, and so I'm at the wake funeral. Everyone kept saying, oh, your mother's with God, your mother's with God. And I'm like, who the heck is this God person Right? So, yeah, I go back to church and in that I said you know God? I want to know where my mom is. They say she's with you. I don't want to talk to you, I want to talk to my mom.

Speaker 2:

Right so that's how I kind of started my first. That was my first spiritual awakening. One would say, yes Is to come back to church in that way.

Speaker 1:

Yes, totally understandable. I could totally definitely relate to that and I'm sure my listeners can too. You know, basically starting out from you as a child, you know, having those hip issues, having to, and the comparison kind of comes in even you know, am I worthy? You know, kind of comparing yourself. I can definitely relate to that and not maybe fitting in at the time and then carrying that with you. And then another thing, you know, I think, when you said, you know, kind of being a waitress and being a life of the party and coming from a good family, you know you had your mom and your dad and siblings, but you still have to take your own journey, which which you did, you still in this journey, on Gina's journey, you know, and the idea of the cruise ship, you know I love the fact that you were like, yeah, let me do this. You know this is, you know, I think I'm going to do this, I'm going to get on this ship like the love boat. I remember the show, the love boat, I love it. And um, you know, and then her being diagnosed with cancer and having to, you know, be there for that experience. And I totally can relate that.

Speaker 1:

My first husband. I'm married now for 12 years, but my first husband died of cancer and I was his caregiver and I supported him through that transition. Looking back now, it was a beautiful experience, Like I'm happy that I was there. He died at home. He didn't die at the hospital, he died around all his family members. And so, reflecting back now, it was a beautiful experience and I know how I want to transition. I'd like to transition at home, with my family around me, just like not so much in the hospital no knock on the hospitals, because whatever works for for you works for you.

Speaker 2:

But in that experience that's definitely which we'll get into, because I know you're end of life doula, yes, I am, I am and, to be honest, Nicole, when my mom died, the the social work of hospice approached me afterwards saying you know you'd be good for hospice. I'm like well, my dead body, will I take care of anyone?

Speaker 1:

Really.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I did not want to take care of anyone. I just take care of my mom. Yes, I was with her through thick and thin. She was always beautiful, so I had, like you said in high school it turns out it was a gift, it was a gift, then it wasn't a gift, that's right.

Speaker 2:

It was a gift. Then it wasn't a gift, that's right, but yet it was. I said that you know, my mom brought me back to my Catholic faith, received the resurrection, and now here I'm starting a relationship. Yeah, at the time, which I it was, it was a relationship, because in that relationship I went right into the convent like a few years later relationship. I went right into the convent like a few years later.

Speaker 2:

That's when I joined the convent, because I went from like a Saddam Ghamour to a St Paul's conversion and then I'm like here I am a warrior of Christ, a soldier of Christ, and I'm going to give my whole life up. And that's why, and that's what joining the con, covid, a religious life, is, is giving up your all and living a life of poverty, chastity, obedience, yeah, this is it.

Speaker 2:

Of course that was not in my plan and I'm like, and everybody loved me because I was a great personality, sister, you know, and so and I did, and at that time I it was the right. You know, I'm not going to say could have, would have, should have. I'm not going to go back on it, it happened, it happened. I really thought God called me to live this life for the rest of my life, but I was only a sister, for I just was there for 12 years.

Speaker 2:

I did make final vows, which meant in my seventh year of religious life I gave everything up, like, gave everything up and I married God and I married the church and I married the like. I gave my service to the community and we were Franciscan, so we worked with the poor, or like in the in the South Bronx, so I gave my life to them and helping them out, as well as evangelization, you know, sharing the love of God. And here I was like a famous nun back then because everybody knew me as a pool shark, bartender and nun. So that was my motto and there was something to let the young kids know, because it's like working with the youth Like hey, you know God loves you, and everything like that. So we did.

Speaker 1:

I worked with.

Speaker 2:

We worked with many people the youth, the elderly, and but at the same time, as I was growing in my vocation, I made my final vows. Everything was great. But, to be honest, nicole, inside was like I was full of fear. I was still emptiness. I was still the community I joined at the time just didn't know what to do with me. It was like my personality clashed. I mean, I don't know if you ever, or you know someone who ever, lived with women, 12 women under a roof. Yes, you know, I mean there's jealousy, there's jealousy, there's envy there's everything.

Speaker 2:

And so I mean a lot had happened, a lot of good things traveled, a lot, but also, you know, I endured a lot of pain and suffering. I really endured the cross, persecution, rejection from the hands of my community and, by the end of 12 years, which, because I kept persevering, I kept going through, I kept, you know, okay, no, no, because I'm especially when I was in final vows, they did say to me that they needed a break from me and I was like what do you mean? And uh, and I did not know. And so they sent me away, you know, to get help, self help on myself and and to see if I really belong with them. And in my heart I did love God and I love the people, but under the roof of being with the sisters, it was just personality clash, whatever it may be. I mean, I was there from the beginning, almost I was the second in charge. It was a mess. It really was. It was a mess that I was in, that I experienced I was emotionally abused.

Speaker 2:

I was just, and at the end of my 12 years of, especially the last two years putting blood, sweat and tears into the place that they asked me. You know they said I didn't belong there anymore. So, okay, I got to keep moving, that's right. And when I kept moving, you know I moved. I went to go live with men with disabilities because I was broken and I just didn't confuse God did you reject me? Et cetera. So I just kept breathing and now I'm living, like I said, with men with disabilities and I'm receiving their unconditional love. So it was a great transitional time of my life. I was there for two years and then the only thing I knew how to do, you know, was to drink. So not that I didn't drink in the convent, but I was like oh.

Speaker 2:

I haven't drank in 12 years, so now I could drink and uh, and then, after doing that for two years, I continue. I'm in my forties, still don't have what's my life, what's my purpose.

Speaker 2:

What's, what is it? Who am I? And so I came to the Jersey Shore, to the beach where heaven and earth meets. And so I came here, needed to get a job. I was done of serving, I'd done it for so many years. Get overwhelmed, gina did what Gina wanted to do. I went back to bartending because that's the only thing I knew how to do. Right, because, mind you, I never had a nine-to-five job. I never did it. I was always like yeah, I had a degree, but yet you know I never went further in that degree, so bartended here at the Jersey Shore.

Speaker 2:

Okay now, yeah, I'm. Now I'm kind of looking for a guy because I'm, like, I'm not being called as a sister anymore, that vocation fulfilled one, and hoping to find some guy that I could live with for the rest of my life. Right, and I did. I found a guy. He walked in, but of course he walked into the bar. I love it and his name was Danny.

Speaker 1:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

And so we you know we at first I was kind of hesitant and and then eventually we started dating and we started liking each other and and, and it was the first time I experienced love for Gina from him. And he found out I was a nun, I didn't scare him.

Speaker 2:

So, and then I come to find out that he's an alcoholic and at the time he was drinking, so an active alcoholic. I didn't know what that was, so I was. He told me to go to a 12 step program called Al-Anon. Went there and then, you know, and he was trying to fight his demons, he was in and out of AA and going to rehab. So I always was there because I believed in him.

Speaker 2:

I'm like okay, god you brought. You know he's a great guy, simply sick. Because when he was sober it was like, wow, yeah, like that, and I still didn't know much about alcoholism at the time. So I was more controlling him and, you know, enabling him, and so, as as time went on like two years later in our relationship, he did find sobriety great, in out in the west great and uh. So, yeah, this is it, nicole, I'm finally getting my life in order, you know, with a man I love and we were going to get married and but as he was driving cross country, he had his own.

Speaker 2:

He has his own story. He ended up getting into a tragic car accident with his mom. His mom was traveling, his mom died, burned up, and Danny burned up. He did not die, he was saved in Indianapolis. So I went uplifted, went to Indianapolis to be with him, ok, got involved with the AA program out there. But you know what does an alcoholic do when they're in so much pain, especially being a driver and seeing his mother burn up. I mean, it was just him burnt that he picked up a few months after that accident. And so we're in Indiana. You know, he picked up. I go crazy. How could you, how could you? And then I mean, and at this point we were engaged, because you know when he was great, everything, and then I kicked him out, et cetera, and then eventually, a couple months after that, he died from this disease of alcoholism.

Speaker 2:

So that was in March of 2013. And so, when that was the ultimate, I wasn't going to overcome this. This was like my flat line. This was totally I was dead, I was angry, I was upset, you name it. I didn't, I couldn't understand. So I did come back to the Jersey shore. I, I was in grief, complicated grief. I did not want to live. I, I didn't have a smile, no more smile on my face anymore. I was just like you know God, my whole life I keep getting up, going forward with the sisters, now with Danny and he's dead. You know, I was like I gave up. My purpose was to suffer.

Speaker 1:

I got it.

Speaker 2:

Let everyone else be happy. I'll take it, don't worry, I can handle it. I've been be happy. I'll take it, don't worry, I can handle it. I've been through that. I can take that pain. But then, yeah, when I came here, god did for me what I couldn't do for myself. Somebody invited me to an AA meeting. I'm like I'm not an alcoholic, danny is. But yet, nicole, I was like, yeah, I'll go there and I'll kill everyone. I said if ice could kill, that meeting would be gone, you know, and I did. I went in there. I did not identify myself as an alcoholic.

Speaker 2:

uh, for several months, several months, until 10 months later, somebody came up to me and said you know, gina, you come here every day. You say you're not an alcoholic, you're here for you know this. And and they, they said what is your relationship with alcohol? My relationship. And so I had to do some searching. I had to let go a lot of my like, my ego, and the denying and the running, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, you know Dan, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

And so on April 2nd 2015, when it came to me, I said my name is Gina, I am an alcoholic, so that was my sobriety date. I'm like, oh my God, what now? You know, I said that. And then that day, when I did say it, everything I carried my self-hatred, my low self-esteem, insecurity, unworthiness, my shame you name it like my false identity, everything, everything on the pains from the sisters, you know, everything just opened up, like I was like one open wound, from the head to my toe. It's just something. It's hard to explain, but I was like it was the worst pain ever, worst pain that I ever carried. And then I heard a voice saying to me what are you going to do? Are you going to run and get a drink and numb it, or run away Like that's what I did without realizing it, or are you going to go to your pity couch?

Speaker 2:

Because I really had a nice pity couch to sleep on, to stay on, to welcome people, and I'm like no, you know. And. And so I did. I stayed in the rooms one day at a time. I just work in the program, listening, getting a sponsor and everything that is asked of me. And because I had nowhere else to go, really I said and I never thought, I never thought I would be happy again, even though when I was in there, even that day it took me a while, because the first 90 days I'm like really, I'm an alcoholic?

Speaker 2:

No, I can't, because my life is like. It's not like this guy's life or this lady's life that ended up in jail.

Speaker 1:

You know I visited jail.

Speaker 2:

I never been in jail, you know and so I learned not to compare, I learned to identify we all have that same pain openness, and I also know now, if I pick up a drink, I can't stop it because it you know it would be yeah, it wouldn't help me today, you know. So in hindsight I look back how I I live my life in now. Today I live my life in a healthy solution. I'm able to live life on life terms without picking up. And then also I'd like to add is that now I got a new God in my life, which is the same.

Speaker 1:

God, I think you said the key thing is it's relationship. You have a relationship versus how it might have. You know, might have been previously Exactly, which I can relate to 100% of my life too, and I'm sure some of my listeners have, and I think there's so many things that people can identify with when you talk about. You know, the rejection and the sisterhood Kind of being your own unique, peculiar personality person. You know, and where do you fit? You know, and maybe God didn't want you to fit, you know that was your journey for a divine reason and so and I think that's something that people are kind of walking into and accepting, being their true, authentic selves, whatever that is.

Speaker 1:

And you know, and going through AA Alcoholic Anonymous, my mom's in recovery and has been for several years. Congratulations, thank you. And just knowing that self-acceptance and like the ego and the pride and the awareness, my mom was like the same way, oh, I'm not that, you know, I'm not those people, that's not me, you know. And her first day there was like no, they were that, that is you, that's you. And so I think you know how it impacts family is that I kind of walked that journey with her, just from a different insight, you know, like Al-Anon. That's why Al-Anon is there for family members.

Speaker 1:

And we, we grew up Catholic. My mom and my aunts and uncles, my grandparents had 13 kids and my mom and dad were teenagers when they had me. My mom was going to send me off. She got sent off, that's what they did back then and she was going to put me up for adoption but my grandparents came and got me from the hospital and it is what it is. But I love the fact that what really resonates is the relationship piece with God. And yet you still persevered and had resilience, even through. You know all this, the relationship, you know the person that you were engaged to, just having to walk that journey, you know, and just acknowledgement of like there's open wounds there, you know, like, and and that we need to be able to, you know, recover those open wounds, to acknowledge some people go through life and don't want to acknowledge that they have wounds and they numb it with alcohol or other things.

Speaker 2:

Yes, so true. It's so true, and congratulations to your mom too, give her a big hug from me because we're all the same and now we're all together because we want to stay sober, because, since it'd be almost 10 years for me and I'm just like, wow, I like this, I want this and I chase more more. This peace, yes, peace in today, that's right. And I also realize life goes on it does without me that's right so challenges do come, whether it's death or health or whatever may be.

Speaker 2:

my first reaction may be negative because I go back to the old ways, but I'm like, okay, no, what are the tools? Well, I first have God, my higher power. Turn to him. What's my next thing? Go to do what I need to do at that moment.

Speaker 2:

And it's just so true about self-acceptance. It's like realizing that's the key, acceptance is the answer to all my problems. And when I could accept myself and even accept the choices I made in the past and what I could or should, I can't go there. That's where there's that, lies that peace just to be in today, be in that moment. And it's still a constant journey. It never ends. Healing never ends, faith never. This journey never ends. Everything never ends. In my life I learn. Every day changes everything, everything. It's all about change and it's being honest, open and willing that I've learned. I've learned, and so today, and in that I'm able to be an end-of-life doula, which is being with someone at the end of their life, being present, which I never thought existed, because I love being with the dying as a sister, I was with the dying. I love going to wakes. I mean I just because, in my heart, I know where they're going. They're going to a better place, to a peaceful place, to their God, to their higher power to their.

Speaker 2:

Buddha, whoever it may be. And so what an end of life doula is help. You know it's just not helping just being there in this transition time, like you were with your husband. You know it's like just to. But now what a difference is with my mom, I didn't have faith, hope or love or God. Now I have faith, hope and love and God, so I'm able to be more present and and and more loving to someone who is dying like you know. Uh, so I do enjoy that yeah it's a passion of mine.

Speaker 2:

So awesome.

Speaker 1:

I know we have a time is closing down. I want to be just time. We have a few more minutes and I. You touched on the end of life doula, Tell me. And you said you love being with the people who are dying, who are transitioning because they're going to another place. Some people do fear that, but it's not going to happen to all of us. Some people do fear that, but it's not going to happen to all of us. What is one of the tools that you think help people with their transition? You know, because some people can fight it, you know, or there can be chaos. What do you think helps? You know, being an end-of-life doula? What things do you think helps with that transition?

Speaker 2:

Well, I, um, it's true that fear, everybody's afraid. It's a natural feeling. That's right. As somebody transitioned, it's so hard to really say you have to be present to to the person because everyone is different, whatever faith they have. Of course, if you have faith, that will help, that's right.

Speaker 2:

Faith in something? Yeah, but yet some people don't. Like you said, people were fighting, but so it's through prayer, so it's always something different. It's not one way right or wrong way, it's just to I pray, ask God, what do you want for them, for the family? Not to say anything, okay, yes, Not to say anything okay, yes, not to say anything or just hold their hand. It's okay, it's okay to feel this way. It's okay to be afraid. What are you afraid of? You know you just become more compassionate oh okay If you're not ready yet.

Speaker 2:

okay, you're not ready.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

Don't worry't worry your god or somebody. There's a time yeah, they're not going to take you in this, you know. So you, the way, that's how I do, you know, I just talk to them like in a okay, leave it in their hands that's what you want. You want an ice cream sundae? Okay, let's go it. I'll get you one the next time. All right, let's go for this.

Speaker 2:

And then of course you know the family. They all act differently, it's all and it's okay. You don't want to be in the room, that's fine. You want to be. You want to go outside, that's fine.

Speaker 1:

That's okay.

Speaker 2:

You know you go with your feelings you go with your heart and I always also. The last thing I'll say is that some you know people. I share with them that people may die with people, family around, but people may die when they're by themselves and that's okay, you know, like, because there's certain times I want to be with people when they die, but they die.

Speaker 2:

Like a few hours when I left and I was like OK that, that you know they, they still have a beautiful death because you're here, loving them, praying for them and being there, being present.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I love that. I love the fact that you said there's no right way, there's no wrong way. Whatever works for them works for them, whether family's there, not there by yourself. It's all a part of it. We're still transitioning, even in the journey to our transition, and I love that. Yeah, like even the ice cream sandwich. I just love the fact that you cultivated this specifically for the person. I love that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and because my passion or my desire is to give the dignity for them to die, yes, on the street, in the street, in a palace, in the hospital, at home. To give them that dignity, yes. And what inspires me is Mother Teresa, and she's still. I have like. Her heart is in my heart. So it's like just giving them that dignity. That, no, you are love, you are love, we love you.

Speaker 1:

Yes, thank you. I so appreciate that, like you said, no matter where they die at, they have the dignity to die, and just being present with the person who's dying means so, so, so much. And I work as a community resource navigator and I work with public safety, but my goal is to redirect costs to mental health experts, crisis teams, things like that, and some people do transition through those crises and we were talking about that, and sometimes it's not for us to say how that happened. But whoever's there, just their presence means so much, without judgment, you know, and so, yeah, and you just confirmed, so I appreciate that.

Speaker 1:

Thank you. One last thing, and I, and if you can go back and speak to 18 year old Gina cause, you've had a journey and your resilience, your faith, your endurance is still here today and you're still serving and blessing people. If you can go back and say something to her, what would you say to her today?

Speaker 2:

Oh, I would say good job, I love you. I love that. Yeah, I love you, Cause I don't think I said I love me in that time. Yes, so I love you and no worries, you know.

Speaker 1:

That's right. Self-love is the foundation. We get that self-love through God, so I love it. If someone wants to reach out to you for your services, what is your web link, gina?

Speaker 2:

It is Gina Econ for short GinaEconcom, so it's GinaEconcom. My book is Shake the Dust. Off your Feet and Walk it's everything I shared is in my memoir Plus more, plus more personal. You know I'm an open book sharing my pain and joy, so you find it that on my website too, as well.

Speaker 1:

Awesome. So Gina's also an author. Shake the Dust Off your Feet. I love it. I love the fact that her resilient, her story is not only empowered me and inspired me, but I'm sure it's going to empower their listeners as well. Gina, it has totally been a pleasure. I'll make sure that I put your link in my description of the podcast as well. Thank you for gracing us with your story and faith and endurance, and you're still here as a shining example and to remind us that. You know that we all transition, but someone being present makes a big difference, no matter what you decided or how it is. Being present is so important.

Speaker 2:

Thank you Gina, Thank you Nicole, and thank you for your service too.