Still Standing: Steph Shepard

Some stories are so good, you have to consume them differently.

We had the chance to interview Last Prisoner Project Executive Director Steph Shepard for vol.13 of CashColorCannabis magazine.

Reading and hearing are two different experiences, and in this case, I think hearing it will give you an even better glimpse into Steph and why she works so hard.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:26

Campus Podcast, a higher level of conversation. Today is a special presentation, in a way. This interview is with Last Prisoner Project Executive Director Steph Shepherd. Um, this interview took place last December. If you have the magazine, you probably already read the story. But I feel like hearing it can give you an even better view of someone who had their life interrupted, found a way to reinvent themselves, and reach back to help those left behind. This was also a hard day for her as a friend of hers had just lost their father. So take that in mind as we spoke about this way before I hit record. This is a great conversation, and Steph, I totally appreciate your time. Without further ado, listen. This episode of the podcast is sponsored by Peak Relief. Located in Rockville, Maryland, Peak Relief is more than a place to find the best flowers. Through events, sponsoring activations, and supporting all groups across the spectrum, Peak Relief is a centerpiece for the community. Learn more about them at their website, peakrelief.com. And if you're in Rockville, Maryland, stop by and chat with their knowledgeable staff and see what they have for you. Three. Hey, this is Cash Color Camp. It's a high level of conversation. And um, you know, right now I'm speaking with somebody who is honestly a real beacon of light in our in our industry. Um, she has done the time, she has spent the time inside and outside working and being an advocate for people who um really have no voice out here. And that is Stephanie Shepherd, um, executive director of Last Prisoner Project. Stephanie, how are you doing today?

SPEAKER_00 2:03

I'm I'm okay. I'm okay.

SPEAKER_01 2:05

Yeah, I know, I know, I know. I don't want to get too sad too because my voice drops. Clearly, people know I'm a beat person, but I understand. You're doing as best as you can. I appreciate you, you know, powering through for this interview, man. Um let's let's get it started, bro. Um, first off, for those who don't know, please just introduce yourself and tell us fully what you do.

SPEAKER_00 2:24

Okay, I'm Stephanie Shepard. I'm currently the executive director of Last Prisoner Project. And I came to Last Prisoner Project through the system. Um, got out of prison after serving my 10-year prison sentence for first-time victimless cannabis conspiracy one charge in in New York where I was living. Yeah, I got a mandatory minimum. Um, and so I got the minimum of that. So that in itself is a blessing for me. I mean, if you can find any bright light in it, um, I could have gotten much more time. So I can only be grateful when I think of our constituents who are serving 40, 60 life sentences. But um, I got out in 2019, I served nine of the 10 years, and when I got out, and I had no um no desire or it didn't even hit my mind to be an advocate. Uh, I just thought I was gonna get out and get back to my regular life, and you know, and I hit the ground after getting out, going to the halfway house in Oakland, being there for a month. Uh, they sent me on home confinement right away because they can't get any money out of you, you know, 25% of whatever job you get to stay in the halfway house, they they don't mind letting you go. So I certainly said, I'm just going to volunteer. You can either go to school, get a job, or volunteer. And I was like, I'm not giving this system another dime of me. So I volunteered at St. Vincent's uh in downtown Oakland. It's like a uh kitchen, um, being families and things like that. And I loved it, I loved doing it. Um, so that was just a plus to now they're kicking me out. So I went on home confinement with an angle monitor for four or five months. Um, but just getting home and seeing what the industry had become was mind-blowing for me. Like I literally am now at this point, I'm out, but I'm still on five years probation. So I'm still, you know, I got an ankle monitor, I'm still shackled to the system. So to see actual, I'd heard about dispensaries, legal dispensaries, you know, on the news and things that I'd watch uh and read from inside, but to actually see it and see billboards and see delivery services that bring it to your front door, yeah. It stirred something in me. And um I went to uh LPP was just getting started, so I was invited to their second fundraiser and uh went to the fundraiser, and as upset as I was at seeing what the industry had become, now I had this feeling of no, there's something we can do about it. There's people who really care about this. Um, it was a room full of people and you know constituents sharing their stories who have been um brought home and assisted by LPP. And I was just like, sign me up. Like, where can what can I do? I don't know anything about, and at that point, I wasn't even looking at it as becoming an advocate. I was looking it at it like I'm so mad, I want to get involved, that's kind of my nature. Uh, my parents, my father was born in 1919, my parents were from the deep south of Alabama, so they have always instilled in me um, get involved, do your part. So it was easy for me to get on board, but as I started doing the work, I started saying, this is kind of what I meant to do.

SPEAKER_01 6:55

You know what? I'm gonna I'm gonna echo this, and it wasn't as serious as your situation, but I just paid the last$200 on a fine I had for having a suspended for my license being suspended, and I paid that money and said to myself, I ain't giving y'all another dime again. So sit me in front of a judge and give me back my license. This has been a 20-year journey, literally a 20-year journey of you telling me I can't have a driver's license over something that happened when I was in college. So I'm done with y'all giving money. This is the last$200 I'm giving you. This was two weeks ago. So I feel you. Like I would have, I would have done the same thing. I'm volunteering, I can give you all the money.

SPEAKER_00 7:29

Yeah, so I mean, and even while I was incarcerated, um, I my feelings were that way. I'm not going to work at Unicor. Yeah. That's slave labor. I'm not doing that for you guys. I'm not going to work in your kitchen. I'm not doing that. You got me here, you got these people here, you feed them. I'm not doing that. The one thing that I said I could do was I worked in education. I taught ESL, which is English second language, which was required for some of our some of our uh uh fellow inmates uh because they're from Puerto Rico. And um, this is New York. I was in Danbury, Connecticut, is was my first stop on my long journey of prisons. So I said, okay, I can get on on board with that. I that I can do because I was ready to go to the hole behind working in somebody's kitchen.

SPEAKER_01 8:29

Look, look, look. Um right way to support her, free her, because yeah, she is 1000% right because we've even watching it right now. I feel like I'm watching human trafficking and and new and new slavery happen in real time right now, people aren't blinking an eye. And um, that's a whole nother conversation, though. Um, getting back to your life though, yeah. How did you find yourself be in the position you are now where you are executive director? Because when I first heard the announcement, I was like, okay, this sounds new, you know, like like when how did you get there?

SPEAKER_00 9:00

Um, well, when I first started, I I volunteered with Last Prisoner Project for about a year and a half. Um and as I got more comfortable with okay, sharing my story, this is where I am. I can't run from my past, so I've got to embrace it. And I started to feel more confident and get back to who I was, not the job I had to get two weeks out the gate. Um it was more getting back to the the type of careers I had before. Um, when I was arrested, I sold real estate for one of the top uh firms in New York. Um, prior to that, I worked in the MBA and I did different things. So I knew this job that I was forced to get because you only have two weeks to get a job or risk violating. So I took whatever and I took what was closest to my house, where I could get home with my ankle monitor on quickly. Like it played a lot of different things played into that part. But um, so when I started to feel more confident, because that's what prison does, it breaks down your confidence. When I started to feel more confident, I kind of let you know the founders of LPP know like I might not be available for some things because I've got to get a real job, like a real job that's a real job for me. And they were like, oh no. If we can figure it out, would you be willing to join us full-time? And they figured it out, and I was able to join as a uh advocacy associate, then I moved on to uh manager, then I moved on to a director of advocacy. Um at that point, then I was asked to join the board. I was then made chair of the board, um, which was all exciting because these are all opportunities for me to bring my experience, my lived experience into this space. You know, we have a very dynamic team from policy to um legal, all of these things, you know. Our our one of our co-founders is a Harvard grad. Um, our our ex-executive director, Sarah Gerston. So, and those are all important to run an efficient organization, but there was something missing, and I think it's that lived experience of having gone through it and knowing what it feels like and knowing what moves we make really do um affect thousands of lives. So it was really important for our whole team to bring that to the forefront. And I was happy to take it on. Like, I'm not gonna lie, nervous, you know. Sarah's huge shoes to fill, but I bring something to the table.

SPEAKER_01 12:19

Yes. What is what is it, what does it mean for you to be a black woman in this in this position? You know what I mean? Because I even listening to your story, I'm like, there's so many more stories of people like yourself, but I have walked into conferences where I've seen plenty of pictures of us in handcuffs on walls as people explain the war on drugs, and then the panel be nothing but white people, or the the organization be nothing but white people. It's dope to see a sister in your position. How does it feel and what does that mean for you as a black woman?

SPEAKER_00 12:47

It's it's huge for me, and I think it's needed and it's necessary because my um point of view is very different from you know, one of our co-founders. She talks about having been in the legacy market since she was 17 years old, you know, for for decades. And she's lucky, she always says, I'm lucky, I'm not in prison. And really, it's not luck. It's they didn't want you. Yeah, and when you look at our constituent makeup, the names are Hernandez, Ramirez, you know, Williams. These are the there it's by design. And people say, you know, our system is so broken. And I no, it's not. It works how it's supposed to, exactly how it's supposed to. So being able to, and anybody who knows me will say, I'm the first one to speak up. I don't have that polished, you know, thing that some people think an ED might have, but I'm gonna give it to you raw and I'm gonna give it to you real. And that's our partners, that's our supporters, the community, that's our constituents. Because one of the things that I point out often is you don't want to feed whole false hopes about what's going on. We as incarcerated folks don't want it to be, you know, glossed over what's going on. And no, we want to know what's happening out there, what's going on. Um, don't try to take it easy on me. I want to know the truth of what's going on, and that's the part that's important to me is that we let our constituents know what's happening, what's going on up at that White House, what's going on at your state governor's office, what we're doing to combat it. I tell people often, you know, you might, you know, this isn't looking good. And they appreciate that because you don't want to give them false hopes about what's happening. We this is a partnership between us and our constituents. So I think when they see me, they know I always have our best interests at heart. And when I say our, I say the incarcerated cannabis community because that's me. I'm it's just geography for me. I just got off of uh probation last year. And that was even a fight. We have at Last Prisoner Project, we have a early termination um program. So at 18 months, if you're federally charged, you're eligible to at least apply to get off early. Doesn't matter if you have five years probation, 10 years, you're eligible at that point. So we've had a lot of success with that. So I was like, as soon as I hit my 18 months, I was like, yes, I'm gonna put me in. And the same prosecutor who prosecuted me said, we're gonna fight it. Like that's how mad they still were at me. And I was like, oh, they probably don't even remember me. I'm just one of thousands of names, but you would be amazed at how personally they take it when you don't cooperate. I felt like I cooperated. I told you, I told you what I did. Yeah, I sold four ounces before, and they were like, no, no, no, no. So um, because I wouldn't speak on anyone else, that wasn't cooperation. Um, and I was like, Well, I'm telling you what I know, I don't know nothing else about nobody else doing anything else. Unfortunately, the people who testified against me didn't feel the same way, but there's no surprise there. The women are usually the ones who hold it down.

SPEAKER_01 17:20

Look, you you did the Lord's work by shutting up. I'm I'm gonna say that too.

SPEAKER_00 17:24

But we all didn't shut up.

SPEAKER_01 17:27

You you did that because you know what you you you I mean, again, the situation where you was in the situation you were in, you owned up to what you had to do and you made them do their job, and that's what they're supposed to do. Do your job. You did you did the part by getting me. Now do the rest.

SPEAKER_00 17:41

And I feel like it was me being a black woman, how dare you? Yeah, and I I didn't care. And I remember one of the agents saying, Do you realize you're going to to prison for 10 years? And I said, That's what you keep saying. I don't know. And they were just because in my mind I didn't believe it. I was like, I've always been good, never been in trouble. Like, I'm a pretty upstanding citizen for the most part. So I didn't have any point of reference about prison. I thought you had to do something horrible to go to prison. So when I took it to trial because they were only offering me an eight-year plea, and I was like, eight? Well, I'd rather make them work for 10 and do the extra two, you know. So that upsets them when you go to trial, even though it's our constitutional right to go to trial. Um, so I went to trial and I still thought there's no way that they're gonna find 10 people who think I should go to prison for maybe allegedly selling some weed. Well, surprise, surprise. Uh the jury did not reflect my peers. Yeah. So, um, and there's that's all things that we have to look at. And I want to make it clear to people who want to dodge their civic responsibility of serving on juries, don't. We need good people on juries. Every every year, before this happened to me, if I get a summons in the mail to appear for on a jury, no, how do I get out of it? What can I say? What can I do? Can I break a leg? I did not want to do it. Now, looking at my jury that had one black woman and one black alternate man, and that one black alternate man was the only person that I felt saw me that would look me in my eyes and shake his head, no. Like I what I just heard isn't right. What they're saying doesn't fit, but he was an alternate, so he had no say so. Um and the one black woman I could imagine what it felt like being in this room of people who are all saying, no, it's Friday, two o'clock, let's go home. We've been here a week. Everybody in favor of guilty say I. I I can't imagine that it would be easy for her to fight for me. I'm a different person. If I had been in that room, we would have been there for another week. So it's important for people to go and do that that that civic duty because you could be saving someone, someone's life who doesn't deserve to be in prison for a first-time victimless cannabis crime.

SPEAKER_01 20:57

Full applause. Full applause, full applause, man. Oh my gosh, it's like full applause, man, down to the jury part because I am somebody as well. I try I I hate going, but I will go because of what you just said. You do not want to see somebody who may or may whose life is really on the line and and they're standing in front of a group of people who don't look like them and just want to go home. And I do want to go home myself, but at least, like you said, I'm gonna make this 12 angry man if it's the case. We gotta go another week. We gotta go another week. I just want to make sure I'm not making somebody spend 20 years of their life behind bars for nothing.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

Yeah. And and I question if they knew my my sentence, but I'll tell you, I was living in Brooklyn at the time. I'd been on a Brooklyn jury before. It was just a civil case. Uh, but it was a young lady, her name was Shanequa. So automatically I I felt the vibe. And her mom had rented a rental car, and there was a needle, a hypodermic needle that stuck this young lady. She was young. So she had to go through years of wondering did I contract something from the needle? Da da da. So when we go in to hear about this case, and I was picked to be on it, I said, no, Shanik was getting this money. Like this big corporation is not going to put this young lady through that. So thankfully, our jury in Brooklyn was very diverse. So when we got out there, the the other side looked looked at the jury. The judge excused us to the back. Five minutes later, the judge came back and said, Thank you all for your service. They they chosen to settle. That's representation, and that's what representation does. They're willing, they want to settle. They don't even want to go through it because when they saw those brown and black faces, majority. When I walk into some of these uh conferences and um conventions and different things, and like you said, the representation of black and brown is almost the reverse of what the representation of incarcerated cannabis prisoners looks like. You know, there's everybody gets everybody can get it with with cannabis and go into prison, but overwhelmingly they look like you and I. When I walk into some of these conferences, overwhelmingly the people making the money don't look like you or I. So and I I make no no qualms about saying that. I don't think it's a surprise to anyone, and I am an advocate, yes, but I'm a black woman first, and I understand what it means to have that disparity like leveraged against you. So I'm very proud um to be in this position, and I I work hard for everyone, and it's difficult in this day and age because I am also, like I said, a black woman first, and having to make certain deals, if you will, maybe put on a bit of a smile to get what we need, otherwise, you know, we're gonna have to sit out the next however many years, few years, and that's just not an option. I um I actually have a really amazing uh executive coach um that I partner with, um Jay Jordan from Reform Alliance. And Jay told me something that has really stuck with me, and it's there's no permanent uh allies, those there's no permanent enemies, there's just permanent issues. And if we're gonna do this work, we have to put that those feelings aside to get this work done. Then I will talk to Parker Coleman or Caswell Sr. And they tell me, no, you got they're telling me, no, you're the one to do this for us. You got this, and I go, yeah, I gotta keep fighting for you guys. And that means a lot to me. You know, people say a lot. People what really matters to me is what our constituents say. That's number one. I take that into consideration um first and foremost, and they've been so supportive of me in this role. And I told them, listen, I might have to make some hard decisions, everything might not be um peaches and cream, but it's always gonna be for the best interest of the mission, which is to bring you home, and they understand that.

SPEAKER_01 26:57

Hey man, let's let's let's end this on a good on a high note. You won two MJs, and um, she flex it right now because she got both of them and they both look different. Like that's she's been here for generations. Like when she gets the third one, watch it be something totally different. Like, this is this is what I'm gonna talk about.

SPEAKER_00 27:13

I'm gonna say the fourth one because we have another one with Mary Bailey uh in Hawaii.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

Okay, bum bad.

SPEAKER_00 27:25

She collected the first one, then she was the second one, and this is our third one, and it's it's really not about the award, it's about the appreciation and acknowledgement for the work that we do. Yeah, there's always gonna be naysayers. There's somebody right now who is saying Beyoncé's not that good of a singer, dancer, or actress, you know? There's somebody saying that. So there's always gonna be naysayers. Like I said, as long as our constituents know what we're doing, see what we're doing, feel what we're doing, as long as our partners trust what we're doing, and as long as the results, the end results, you know, being able to calculate we have saved 359 years of incarceration. We have saved eight life sentences. Like that's what this represents.

SPEAKER_01 28:37

Talk, clock that, clock that. That's what I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

That's it. So I'm always open to conversations, reasonable conversations with people about you have a question about where your donation goes, happy to talk to you about it. You have a question about a bill that we wrote the language for, happy to talk to you about it. But there's only a couple of different things people can do. They can get on board, they can get out of the way, or they can get passed by.

SPEAKER_01 29:16

Well, congratulations on the way. Um, you are represented well for Last Prisoner Project, and I think they have a good one here with you. Um, if somebody wanted to learn about Last Prisoner Project, how they could either donate, volunteer their time, or even just support overall, how can they do that?

SPEAKER_00 29:30

Uh easy. They can go to www.lastprisonerproject.org. They can follow us on Instagram or Twitter. Um we really try to make it easy for people to get involved. You can go to our take action page, uh, sign up for a newsletter and be up on what we're working on. So you don't we try to make it so you don't have to wonder, what are they doing over there? No, we want you to know what we're doing. We're gonna blast it, we're gonna scream it from the mountaintops. We are proud of the work that we do, and I'm proud of the work that I do. So um, I'm happy to talk about it with anybody, and and we try to make it easy. Um, it is the holidays. I do want to say it is the holidays, and um holidays in prison, super lonely, super difficult time. That's when more people go to the shoe or the hole, whatever people call it. Uh, that's because tensions are high, your emotions are just so high. It's a holiday, you want to be with your family. Something as simple as a letter can really change the trajectory of someone's day and calm them down and make them not snap because somebody's watching the wrong TV or cut me in the shower line. Those are small things, but when you're twisted up because it's the holidays, you miss your family, that can become explosive quick. So, holiday letter writing is awesome. We've made it super easy. You can go to the take action page, you can um get a chance to look at our letter writing guide, read bios written by the majority of them written by the prisoners about what they're going through, their story. Um, this is my boy Parker Coleman. Love him, adore him, and gonna keep fighting for him. So go through the guide. Take 10 minutes out of your day, write a letter. I want to see one come through. Uh, you can either do it um snail mail, obviously, you can send it yourself, or you can do it online and I print it out and I send it to them. Um, so I know who's sending what if you send it through our digital portal. So I want to see one from you. I we have a newsletter. I would love to have maybe a message from you as the opening of our next newsletter.

SPEAKER_01 32:06

I would love that. You know, I was gonna end, we you know, after we got done with this, I was gonna say, wait, give me a second, because I did want to speak to you about how I could help you amplify some of these messages, you know, through Cash Color Canada. So that's definitely a thing, but I want to give that away for people listening or reading this right now.

SPEAKER_00 32:19

Right, that's okay. I will end on storytelling is important, yes, uh, communication with our people is important. Um, so any stories that we tell, obviously, our constituents have agreed to tell their stories, they want their stories out there. Um, and so that makes it really easy. And we know we're we're doing their work, we're their voice, and they've asked that of us by signing uh the agreement that they want their stories shared. I can't imagine having people saying my names when I was incarcerated for all that time to have people speaking about me um on different media platforms and things like that, telling my story that I can't share myself, but finding a way to get my voice out there. So super important. Write holiday letters, uh it's super easy. You can add your information and get a letter back. You can um just send a great message. You don't have to sign up for a pin pal, but trust me, it's a small thing, it's a small lift on our part, but it makes a huge impact. So please join the holiday letter writing campaign.

SPEAKER_01 33:40

No, nope, nope. Steph, thank you so much for your time. I know you brave this, and I really appreciate you for doing that for us today.

SPEAKER_00 33:46

No, absolutely. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01 33:48

Yes, and that's Cash Color Campus High Level Conversation. We are and that's Cash Color Canvas Podcast, a higher level of conversation. Subscribe to us on Patreon and catch these episodes early, or listen to us later on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you stream podcasts. Cash Color Canvas, a higher level conversation. This episode of the podcast is sponsored by Peak Relief. Located in Rockville, Maryland, Peak Relief is more than a place to find the best flowers. Through events, sponsoring activations, and supporting all groups across the spectrum, Peak Relief is a centerpiece for the community. Learn more about them at their website, peakrelief.com. And if you're in Rockville, Maryland, stop by and chat with their knowledgeable staff and see what they have for you.