Real Lives of Real Estate w/ Brendan Da Silva
Welcome to the Real Lives of Real Estate, a brand new real estate podcast unlike any other. Your host is the #1 Realtor in Newark, NJ, Brendan Da Silva, and every week he interviews real estate professionals about how working in the industry has affected their lives and stories.
Real Lives of Real Estate w/ Brendan Da Silva
Lawnmower Beginnings to Real Estate Riches with Michael Martinetti
Have you ever listened to the hum of a lawnmower and considered it the soundtrack of a future millionaire? Michael Martinetti's story starts with the whir of blades on grass, transforming a kid's chore into a springboard for an exceptional career in real estate. Join us as Michael divulges the secrets behind his rapid ascent to a $400,000 first-year windfall. From his modest roots in Union, through a short stint teaching in Newark, to the sun-soaked beach conversation that catapulted him into property investment, this episode is a narrative tapestry woven with family values, serendipity, and an unyielding entrepreneurial spirit.
Navigating the real estate landscape requires more than just a sharp eye for investment—it's about the bonds we forge along the way. Michael's journey reveals the profound influence of family proximity, the balance between leadership and camaraderie within his team, and the heartening practice of sharing the wealth with those who helped build it. He bares his soul on how coaching redefined his approach to business, and how opening doors for others can be the most rewarding accomplishment of all. Our conversation is an exploration of Michael's blueprint for personal and professional growth, where every setback is a learning experience, and every triumph is a shared victory.
But what does it truly take to juggle a bustling career with the demands of family life? Michael gets candid about the challenges of fast-paced success, keeping grounded amidst newfound wealth, and the humbling act of relinquishing ego. His insights extend beyond the bricks and mortar of real estate, delving into the essence of what it means to grow alongside your loved ones and your business. Whether you're an aspiring mogul or a veteran in your field, this episode is an intimate masterclass in fostering relationships, embracing change, and the enduring pursuit of growth.
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You get into real estate, did you make $100K your first year?
Speaker 2:I made almost $400,000.
Speaker 1:$400,000 your first year of real estate.
Speaker 2:What I did was I bought a lot with it $242,000 and I built a house. And boy did I make every mistake with building that house. School construction cost me over a million dollars, oh yeah. I'm doing four right now and I help some of my investors flip their own houses. I just can't help it, but I love it. It it drives me.
Speaker 1:Get ready for Real Lives of Real Estate, where the world of real estate meets the essence of your life. Buckle up as we unravel stories, homes and the heartbeat behind it all. Let's dive into another episode. I hope you share and are encouraged. I am here with Michael Marinetti. The one, the only, the man, the myth, the legend. They call him Union County next mayor, not even Union's next mayor. The whole county. Can you have a mayor of a county? I don't think that's a thing may all be the first.
Speaker 1:Wow, okay there you go. All right, real trick shortener and a friend of mine for sure. Welcome. Thank you for coming out yeah, man, uh, look, I want to start off with a question we always like to ask where, what did you grow up in? Did you grow up in a single family house, apartment building, what did you grow?
Speaker 2:up. I grew up in the same single family house. I was about a 2,400 square foot house in Union. I moved from one bedroom to the other bedroom, to the basement, oh wow, and I lived there for almost 30 years. So I lived home until I was 29.
Speaker 1:Wow, in the same house, same house.
Speaker 2:I just drove by it yesterday. It was weird driving by your house. You 30, almost 30 years of memories in you know and seeing it.
Speaker 1:And how old are you? I'm 33 so this is pretty much your whole life yeah, pretty much my whole life man, yeah, yeah wow, yeah, okay, that's it. Let me ask you a question why do you like?
Speaker 2:no one likes to move in your house no, I mean, and if it wasn't, it wasn't for me, my parents would still be living there till today. I uh, you know, I built them a house three blocks away from me and I basically yanked them out of the house. They didn't want to go. Two doors down was my grandparents, wow. So I grew up having grandparents next door, which was a great experience. Yeah, so special. A lot of people would probably love to have that opportunity.
Speaker 1:For me it was amazing.
Speaker 2:They instilled a lot of the skill sets and qualities I have in my life now just from them being there, kind of having like a second mom and dad, wow. So it was awesome, you know, and they were, they lived to be 94, 92.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, so yeah they were they were a part of my life for. They had a full life. Yeah, super full.
Speaker 2:Yeah, A little bit overly full yeah yeah, 92, 94. Yeah, I saw my first. My grandfather met my first child. So yeah, it was cool. Yeah, yeah, man.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's special. Yeah, it was. When did you let me ask you a question? At what point, you know, growing up in that single family, did you realize that your parents?
Speaker 2:owned the house? You know it's a good question. I think, probably younger than most people would say. I knew they owned the house, probably around like eight or nine. Um, cause I started making money around eight. Uh, I, I remember I was in, I think I was in second or third grade and I went home one day and I, you know, I told my mom. I said, ma, I want to start cutting lawns and like doing snow.
Speaker 2:And I want to ask Santa for that. So my Christmas list was snowblower, lawnmower, wagon, leaf blower, and santa brought me all that. So, uh, that's probably when I knew they owned the house, um, and that we, we weren't renting, and when I started to start to learn, like just financial opportunities and things like that so what kind of kid wants a?
Speaker 1:yeah, just a wacky one like me, all right. And then your parents like, okay, hey, he's gonna do the lawn they were all in you know.
Speaker 2:So I was cutting lawns and I I had my mom go to work and print out like 200 flyers. I went door to door on your mom's job.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I didn't have to pay for print yep 100.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then I would. I delivered it in the neighborhood wow, and then I would walk around yeah, I would walk around and do the snow and lawns and like I was dude on a good snowstorm, I made like 500 bucks.
Speaker 1:Oh, let me go back 30, almost 30 years ago every single time it snowed I would always shovel, since I was like, uh, 15, 14 and or 13 not that young, but 14, 15 and when I was getting into like I grew up very low income. So we, like I did it because I like one nice, I wanted things, yeah. So I would even knock on my neighbor's door and say, hey, do you need any help around the house? With anything whatsoever Can I help? And I remember literally bringing in groceries for $10.
Speaker 2:Literally. I was in the 1960s.
Speaker 1:So in the early 2000s we used to call it, when it snowed, white gold, because you make so much money, of course, and it was all cash and at the end of the day you were like cold as hell.
Speaker 2:You pull out that wad and you're like and that person hit you with a 20 buck tip because you did a good job.
Speaker 1:Yeah, can you hit the apron of the driveway, happy. Yeah.
Speaker 2:I was like yeah, no worries, that's been all day doing it can I tell you what my trick was?
Speaker 1:I had a million dollar trick. Everyone, let's think you should take this. If you're trying to get in the snows removal uh, hustle I would say like oh, how much you charge. I would say whatever you feel comfortable with, just whatever you feel fair and they would always go crazy on the pay?
Speaker 1:yeah, because instead of me haggling about price, I would say hey, whatever you feel is fair. Yeah, so every once in a while you got a jerk off who would give you like 15 bucks or 10 bucks, 20 bucks, but very often I would get crisp 100 interesting because I always gave a price.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, I started off with a pricing strategy then. Then I realized, man, I'm losing clients because of this. So when I said, hey, I'll do it for free. People would never like people feel so guilty. Right, it's a lot of reciprocity, whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Reciprocity. If somebody said that to me, I would overpay them 100%, overpay 100%.
Speaker 2:Yeah every time. Yeah, 100 said I want to shovel your snow and they didn't give me a price. I'm going to give them way more than they would have told me, just because I don't want to be a jerk off yeah, 100, okay now, so I'd be your perfect uh oh, you're the guy who I was looking for.
Speaker 1:I was like you bike, yeah. So all right back to the real estate world. So let me ask you this so you have this house, it's really special that your family's grandparents are so close. I think that's an amazing thing. Yeah, how would you say that impacted you being so close relationally with your family?
Speaker 2:I mean it's great. You basically get mentorship from two parents, right? Because you have your grandparents and your parents. So everything your parents wouldn't let you do, grandma, did you go to grandma's house because grandma's not going to say no, right, grandparents are there to do all the things that your parents say you're not allowed to do, you're not allowed to eat, and that's what they do. But, on a serious note, you know they instilled a lot of qualities to me that other kids don't get to experience or they're in after school programs because their parents are working or they're home alone, so they're not being stimulated and they're doing whatever the hell they want. You know I always had a mother father figure in my life, so it allowed me to just prosper, because when my parents were working, you know, I was being pretty much raised by them, and then when my parents came home, I was raised by them. So I was getting two different types of parenting skills and things like that of qualities being instilled in me without realizing it. That made me the man I am today.
Speaker 2:You know they always allowed me to stay busy and never let me get on video games and things like that. I was always doing things going to the park or doing whatever and I'm only a, so I grew up by myself but I was never bored. I never really was alone. I was always out playing and kind of create like that work ethic that I now have you know now which drives my business yeah, and really fully drives your business.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, you're like a workhorse, this man yeah, I mean, yeah, I work more than than people probably think, but not anywhere near as much as people think as well.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow, both yeah Now you said that you yanked your parents out of that house and you built them a house nearby. What made you move your parents?
Speaker 2:I just want my kids to have the opportunity to have what I experienced. And then also, my parents are older, so they didn't have me when I was young uh, when they were young, rather so it's easier for me to to help them do their snow and god forbid something happens. I'm two blocks away, yeah how far were you?
Speaker 1:where do you live now?
Speaker 2:I'm in clark, clark yes, oh, so you're.
Speaker 1:And now, how far were you previously to them? Like 15 minutes 15 minutes yeah yeah, so it was a little bit god forbid I was never away from them.
Speaker 2:As soon as I moved out, they in with me and then, once her house was done, they moved in. Yeah, I was never away from them ever.
Speaker 1:There's no way. That's true.
Speaker 2:Yeah, never Now you're.
Speaker 1:I met your wife in Vegas, right. Your wife is wonderful, Very, very, very kind hearted woman. Let me ask you a question here what?
Speaker 2:would you say how? She probably didn't like it and probably would never want that to happen again.
Speaker 1:Okay, oh them living with you yeah.
Speaker 2:But it's great that they're close and my kids enjoy getting picked up from school from them and going to their house. It breaks up their day and they know how to get there already, which is great. My kid's Mia's 10, so she obviously knows how to get there. But Michael knows how to get there, joseph kind of knows the routine, al routine, alina's only one, so she has no idea to get to the house yeah, but they, they, you know, if I told my boys to go, they know how to get to their house wow, yeah, really beautiful.
Speaker 1:How often do they see each other?
Speaker 2:I'd say like once or twice a week at a minimum if not more. You know, I don't know during the week when they see each other because I'm not really home yeah, but it's probably more than once or twice a week now. Okay sweet.
Speaker 1:Well, all right now. Your story is actually very interesting because my wife is a school teacher, right, and you graduate from union high school, right, you're a big union man you get into. Can you tell me a little bit transition from what got you into real estate, not real estate actually teaching? Yeah, because I'm feeling like you know you grew up, you see you clearly had a lot of ambition. You clearly have this like hey, young hustler, why become a teacher?
Speaker 2:you know, when you're 18 years old and you're immature, like I was, and your mom says, okay, what do you want to do for the rest of your life?
Speaker 1:you wake. You're kind of like wow, what a question.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm like I don't know ma yeah I want to do sports marketing.
Speaker 1:It's like she got me an internship with the jets no way swear to god, so I worked with the jets I worked there for three weeks.
Speaker 2:I said ma, I hate this. I'm not doing this. Get me the hell out of here. Why'd you hate it? It was awful, dude, what they just don't. They don't treat you well. You're basically like a little peasant running around. You're making no money and it just sucked I was like Ma this is not for me, this is not for me.
Speaker 2:So she made me stay there for like two more weeks and then I was like, ma, I doing it, it sucked. So she, she didn't like that I quit, but I quit. And then she's like, well, now, what do you want to do? Michael? And I was like I don't know. Ma, I was like I like kids, I like sports, I'm kind of good at them, I'm gonna be a gym teacher. And she's like great, you should go be a teacher.
Speaker 2:I said, great, that's what I'm gonna do so I went to be a teacher wow so, from sports marketing to an internship with the jets, you find your way.
Speaker 1:Okay, and where'd you end up teaching?
Speaker 2:So I wanted to change the world, just like any other 21 year old immature boy did. So I. I wanted to uh, I wanted to teach somewhere where you know I could make an impact on children and really try to change the world. That I thought I was going to, so I ended up in Newark.
Speaker 1:The homeland.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:The promised land. Here we are in newark, come on cruise, yeah. Yeah. It's funny too, because I like my wife's school teacher. She felt the same way she still does. She only wants to work with urban. When she uh, urban youth I originally, when she came I was like hey, I can get you a job in like a yippity uppity area. She's like no, no, no, I, because she was a teacher in the dob right, sorry the doe the department of education in new york, and she came to jersey. She's like no, I only want inner city. I'm like Deb, you're insane, this is crazy yeah she's like no, I only want in city.
Speaker 1:Now it's funny. We live in Newark. My wife works in Newark at the church over here in uh CC in Ironbound my, obviously you're in the office right now. Newark and pretty much my whole life is Newark. Yeah, and it's funny just because I'm thinking like I can't imagine you as that person?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I did it for five years. It's not like I did it for a year or two, I did it for five years and then I had the 10. Wow five years. All I had to do was go to work the next year for one day and I would have been tenured. And what does that mean? Tenure means job security, unless you do something. Absolutely ridiculous. Yeah, you got a job for the rest of your life you had to go to school.
Speaker 1:For how much longer? Uh, one day. What do you? Okay, pause one day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what do you mean? One day I had to go to school and not get fired on the first day of school and I was tenured for for life whoa, okay, so walk me through.
Speaker 1:How did your life get impacted by? What was your life look like your personal life that is outside of this when you were a teacher?
Speaker 2:so you know I was wishing my life away, honestly, and it wasn't because I didn't like working where I worked or the children, just the whole school system. Uh, I'm not gonna get into it, but I don't necessarily like what they were making us do. I don't necessarily agree with how a lot of the school systems run things what they are making you teach versus what they're not, and I just wasn't, wasn't really into it um even at that.
Speaker 1:This is like this is what?
Speaker 2:so? Yeah, we're going probably 12 years.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, 12, 12 years ago till seven years ago and now it's even yeah, now there's new new jersey is too very liberal, very progressive, right yeah?
Speaker 2:so you know, I, I just I wasn't, I wasn't for it, I didn't agree to it, I didn't, I wasn't in and north't have a contract, so I never got a raise. So for five years I made the same money. What? Yes, no raises.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, that's no way yeah yeah, yeah, same money for five years.
Speaker 2:Why didn't they give raises to teachers? Because it was shut down. There was no agreement between the teachers and the teachers in the teachers union. So I made the same amount of money for five years. Right, I was making one thousand three hundred eleven dollars every two weeks one thousand three hundred eleven dollars every two weeks thirteen hundred bucks a week.
Speaker 2:I have two weeks to be a teacher 26 and, mind you, I was at a renewed school, so what that means is you're working extended day. So we started at 7 35, I didn't get home till four and you have to work four saturdays a year. And you had to work three weeks in august. What? And there's no, no how. There's only major holidays, so jewish holidays weren't oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:So who wants to be a teacher at that school?
Speaker 2:yeah, not me not wait.
Speaker 1:What the heck do you know? Now they're starting pay a newer teacher. I think it's like 63k 62k.
Speaker 2:Sign on 60k 61k which is even that, even that, even that they're having difficulty.
Speaker 1:They're just negotiating out for another pay increase.
Speaker 2:You can't survive off this no, and newark it's very brutal I mean just just imagine, let's let's take two teachers. Okay, let's say they have a child 120 000, they live in new jersey, they have a child yeah, where are you going?
Speaker 1:it's the most underpaid job outside of nursing yeah, in the world, I agree, I truly in the world.
Speaker 2:I Nurses are the number one most underpaid profession in the world.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Second is teachers.
Speaker 1:I agree with you 100% and a close third is cops and firemen.
Speaker 2:Oh everything you said word for word. It's ridiculous.
Speaker 1:That's what I was telling you before about one great thing in Newark. We were talking about crime in Newark. Newark's crime rate has gone down. The cops they're approaching Raz Baraka. He's a phenomenal man, the mayor. His approach to solving crime is huge, not very popular.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Not very popular.
Speaker 2:That's okay.
Speaker 1:But he's playing more. Last year they hired like 60-something cops just in one year. They're getting cops that. They're approaching young cops too, where you gotta see where everything's going right now. A lot of people are like oh, I don't. And that are coming with fresh perspective, really trying to do their thing, honoring the tradition of the past. You got to man. Yeah, I agree with you 100%. These guys are going even in Newark. It's crazy what these guys are willing to do. You're right For teachers, especially the bottom of the tone pole.
Speaker 2:It's a joke.
Speaker 1:You don't matter how hard you work as a teacher you have to have benefits for life.
Speaker 2:They took that away from really. Yeah, no, oh yeah, it's gonna be very hard to be a teacher.
Speaker 1:It's a joke very hard to be a teacher. Meanwhile, we make what we do. Not that what we do is not hard, right, it is, oh, but for sure the teachers are busting their butt. And you're saying four saturdays, yeah, so okay. So how was your personal life in that?
Speaker 2:uh, you know it was. It was affected because my day was at was basically consumed with teaching and I just like dreaded going to work every day. I didn't, I didn't love it, right, and I felt bad, cause it's like I love seeing those kids and I was an outlet for a lot of them, right? A lot of them didn't have dads, a lot of them may not even have parents.
Speaker 2:So to them, like they're, they're excited to see me and I was excited to see them and I liked the people that I worked with and I had an amazing did. She allowed me to do my own thing. She didn't micromanage me, she didn't, you know, like she was awesome, really nice woman.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:And she wanted to have a positive change in the kids' lives and she did and she's done a lot of big things in Newark. Wow huge, you know. So that was awesome. It was just the stuff that her and I couldn't control which ultimately drove me to quit.
Speaker 1:And I remember.
Speaker 2:I cried my last day, wow. When the kids knew that I was leaving and that it was my last day, I cried and I hugged the woman that I taught with for five years. It was very sad, it was very. It was tough.
Speaker 2:It was hard for me because I loved those kids, you loved the kids and I knew that because I love those kids you love the kids and I knew that a lot of those kids, uh, were not going to probably ever see me again, or talk to me and I'll have a teacher like you, right I remember one time you told me a story that you were on the bus with kids it was their first time leaving new york.
Speaker 1:I'll never forget that story.
Speaker 2:That was crazy you know, it made me really realize how, how, like well, I had it right and I don't come from money. We don't come from a wealthy family. No, we're just normal, normal middle class.
Speaker 1:You had a home, but you weren't okay. We're going to go on this.
Speaker 2:I knew what I could ask for versus what I couldn't.
Speaker 1:I knew my norm.
Speaker 2:I had it better than a lot of people, but I also knew I was not.
Speaker 1:You were middle class. Yeah, I was middle class.
Speaker 2:We were correct, you're a middle class. Yeah, it was middle class. We were very middle class, right, um and uh.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I I would always do uh things to raise money for the school coat drives, food drives wow, uh take them on trips and uh, so we were going ice skating, okay, we went over a bridge and when I tell you, you would thought that the bus just saw two people in the middle of the highway fighting naked. Was the noise like they were just like, oh my god. And so I'm looking, I'm like what, what happened?
Speaker 1:I'm thinking somebody's fighting you know, like what's going on? It's out and they're like we're on a bridge.
Speaker 2:I'm like and I'm, so I just sit down and I'm like, I'm sitting there and I remember I was just like holy shit, we're on a bridge and these kids are going nuts on a bridge.
Speaker 1:Could you imagine going on a bridge? Yeah, it's like no big deal. What are?
Speaker 2:we talking about and they were going nuts. It was like, literally I thought somebody was fighting, like I thought something crazy was happening.
Speaker 1:Okay, Well, Mike, now I got to ask you this so the last day of your teaching you got into real estate?
Speaker 2:this. So the last day of your teaching you got into real estate. That was a pivot. Yeah. So last day of teaching I rented a shore house in belmar, partied all summer and was going to school during that uh for what real estate? Okay, you know, and, and nobody in my life wanted me to do real estate, by the way, nobody so what got you?
Speaker 1:what put that seed in your head?
Speaker 2:so when I was 23 years old, uh, I was hung over on the beach outside of DJ's on 18th and Belmar and my best friend's wife's cousin my best friend's wife's cousin yes, his name's Chris Taglia, and he probably doesn't even realize how much he has to do with where I am in my life, because I've never told him, I've never had a conversation about him. But this guy is the reason why I do real estate, because he was on the beach, conversation about him. But this guy is the reason why I do real estate, because he was on the beach. He was telling me.
Speaker 1:He owned a two family in.
Speaker 2:Garwood and he made $1,600 a month. So my light bulb just went off. So what do you think I did? Click yeah, so snowblower, yep. So now I'm like, okay, I'm going home, tell my mom I'm buying a house. So what I did? I went home I said, ma, I got a great idea, I'm going to buy a house and I'm going to make money.
Speaker 1:Meanwhile, you just quit your job.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, I'm still teaching. Okay, I'm still teaching at the time. And so, two months later, I bought a house.
Speaker 1:By the way, I overpaid a significant amount for that house.
Speaker 2:Where was the house? Two family and union.
Speaker 1:Oh, cool, and I still own it to this day. Nice, yeah, still own it, I should, but I'm not.
Speaker 2:So I bought that house and I was making money. So I was like damn, this is great.
Speaker 1:How much were you making?
Speaker 2:I was making almost $1,800 a month. Now, mind you, I'm only making $1,313 every two weeks, but now I'm making $1,800 extra. It's basically almost double your income. You're right. So then I'm saving, I'm saving, I'm living home right Turn. Living home right um turned 26. I bought my second. Two family, by the way, overpaid for that house too. Uh, was the most expensive house to ever sell in union as a multi. That house that I bought at the second one at 465 as an investor? Yes, as an investment right, so I overpaid, but fast forward, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you look like a genius. Yeah, right, eight years, uh, seven, almost eight years yeah, you're the smartest guy in the room I could probably sell for nine right now right free, but those two houses. I was making almost four thousand dollars a month, so I quit teaching and I you actually replaced your income and then some right, oh wow, correct so I knew what I was doing, but you were an investor. At that point I was. I was still living at home, yes, but let me ask you a question you're 30.
Speaker 1:okay, this is a. I'm very interested in this. Okay, you got me so excited, so your second investment property. But how do you get into Home? Yes, let me ask you a question. You're 30. Okay, I'm very interested in this. Okay, you got me so excited, so your second investment property. But how do you get into real estate as a job?
Speaker 2:I just thought that I knew people and people would like me, and I kind of knew the process a little bit.
Speaker 1:You bought two.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I wasn't completely clueless and I sold candy in high school. I did lanyards and sold them during 9-11. I sold crazy things. I'm like if I could sell a lanyard to somebody, how could I not sell a house?
Speaker 1:right.
Speaker 2:And the goal was to sell enough to make $100,000 a year and buy one two-family a year. That was my goal. That's all I was looking to accomplish.
Speaker 1:Buy one two-family a year. I'll be set.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:Not be set. Yep, not even a four family. You said two, two, yeah, that's what I did.
Speaker 2:You know, wow, that's and now here we are. What is that? Seven?
Speaker 1:years later, seven years later? Okay, let me ask you some rapid fire questions. Sure, okay, how would you say you know, because how old are your kids? Uh, 10, 4, 2 and 1. 10, 4, 2 and 1. So you had a kid all with kate, kate. Sorry, I apologize, kate, I do like a lot, I'm so sorry for your name.
Speaker 2:You are a sweetheart.
Speaker 1:It's all with Kate. Kate was with you when you were a teacher.
Speaker 2:No, kate met me just two years into my career.
Speaker 1:But you have a kid that's 10.
Speaker 2:How long have you been in real estate?
Speaker 1:So Kate was married prior to me, Step so step, ah, okay, so step, okay, gotcha so.
Speaker 2:Michael was consumed. Yeah, he's December 17th.
Speaker 1:So he's gonna be five this year. Beautiful, okay. So that was your first with Kate. Yeah, yeah, yeah, gotcha, okay, all right.
Speaker 2:So Okay. So how does it work? You get into real estate. Did you make $100,000 your first year? I made almost $400,000.
Speaker 1:$400,000, your first year of real estate. Okay, what did that shift kind of do to you?
Speaker 2:So my first year didn't do much. I bought a shore house. Wait, pause. No, stop that.
Speaker 1:You're making $2,700 a month as a teacher.
Speaker 2:Net after taxes more or less $.
Speaker 1:It's more or less $2650. Yeah, you go from $2650 To $35,000, $32,000, whatever, it is $35,000 a month. Yep, $33,000 a month. Mm-hmm, you're telling me that doesn't change your world.
Speaker 2:It didn't change my world, because what I did was I bought a lot with it.
Speaker 1:A lot, oh, literally Literally a lot, a lot of land.
Speaker 2:Yeah, a lot of land, yeah, and Tom's River.
Speaker 1:Why'd you do that with your money?
Speaker 2:Because I knew it was smart.
Speaker 1:Why was it smart?
Speaker 2:Because I knew that it would gain value for me. How do you?
Speaker 1:know that You're so wet behind the ears. What gave you the chutzpah?
Speaker 2:to do new construction. I won my stock market project and I knew that stocks built wealth and I owned homes that I knew were worth more, and I always knew that my parents' house was gaining value. So I just knew it was smart to do without knowing. I didn't know. You're 100%.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:You didn't know, but I just assumed that that was a smart thing to do.
Speaker 1:Now you know.
Speaker 2:Now I know yeah.
Speaker 1:But before you did, before you knew Correct, correct, wow, okay, and buy a hundred piece of land $242,000, and I built a house. And you build a house.
Speaker 2:And boy did I make every mistake with building that house. School construction cost me over a million dollars, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:I know.
Speaker 2:I go back to college. Tenfold, yeah, school construction. I'm over a million dollars.
Speaker 1:This is my this is my biggest week. I have a lot of weaknesses in life when it comes to our company leads, database marketing, helping you know, working with clients doing seminars, all that stuff great. When it comes to managing my own construction projects, I am literally the worst.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I will make a great flip, turn good right. Like I will bring it down, like that's the only reason why I've survived is because I buy so cheap. Yeah, but, man, it's caused me a measurable stress. The school construction you called it. Yeah, school construction. Yeah, man, the school construction is very expensive man it is I hate that school.
Speaker 2:I don't want to go back but I'm going back, yeah, because I'm in it right now. We're glutton for punishment. I'm doing four right now, yeah, and I help. I help some of my investors flip their own houses.
Speaker 1:So it'm just glutton for punishment. Why do you do it?
Speaker 2:Because I'm just an idiot and I just can't help it, but I love it. I love it. It drives me.
Speaker 1:It's the chase.
Speaker 2:Did you end up building the house? I did. Did you sell it? Nope, I still have it. What do you do with it? I use it three months a year.
Speaker 1:Don't rent, you don't mean hey, hey, you need a place to stay there for a while, friend. This is your sanctuary.
Speaker 2:It's really for my kids. They love it. They ask about it all winter long. They don't have the concept yet of that. We only go down in the summer.
Speaker 1:So they ask about it because they want to go, because they relate to that, to going on the jet skis and the boats, but is it on the water or no? It's on the water, yeah.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, toms river, right where, like east of toms river, like. So if you know where the seaside bridge is, I can. As soon as I come out of my lagoon, I see it. Oh, you're right there. Yeah, I'm seven minutes from the boardwalk.
Speaker 1:Oh, you're great, oh great. Yeah, oh, you're the best, probably, probably one of the better spots. Yeah, yeah, oh wow. And toms river has increased so much in value, so you've definitely done.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, with all my mistakes and everything I did wrong, I still somehow have some property. Uh, equity, equity yeah, Good job.
Speaker 1:Now let me ask you this so you were single when you built it?
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:Did you? You built a single family house as a single man living with his parents making $400,000. Okay, what did your friends think about you when you did that?
Speaker 2:Well, it took five years to build, so we never enjoyed it as a single man. It took five years. I told you the school of construction was very expensive. I hired a builder. Then I realized I was getting hosed. I fired him. I hired another builder. It didn't go well, fired him. Then I tried to finish it, but I didn't know what I was doing. That took forever. I was working. I was so busy with real estate I couldn't go down there and manage it. It was a disaster. It was a nightmare. We've only been using the house for three years and, by the way, I have probably close to 100 violations on the house right now because I have to close all permits out and everything's done wrong. And it's a nightmare that I'm still living.
Speaker 1:By the way, Do you know what's so sad about this? Well, I feel bad for you. I feel very happy for me in this moment. I bought a piece of land in Tom's River, old Church Road. It wasn't the best location and I ended up. I was in a buy and build Same thing. This is last year. I was like man, I don't know if I should build. I'm a little bit worried. I'd never built before. My money was tight. I said da, da, da, da da da, da da.
Speaker 1:I sold it and I always look back. Man, did I make the right decision? Hearing your story, I made a great decision. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:I made a great decision. It was a nightmare, dude. It still is a nightmare and I'm still living it. Yeah, I'm still living it Seven years later. Yeah, I'm still living it, my God, yeah, I'm still living it. Okay, so I mean, we're still. My friends, are still my friends. All my friends are from high school. I didn't have college friends cause I went to Kane, I commuted, I hated school, I wanted to be there as little as possible. So really all my friends are from high school or those that I've met in real estate or that work with me.
Speaker 2:So I don't want to say it impacted much. A lot of my friends have kids now and as you grow older you just the natural thing, you just kind of you get further away. But luckily for me, a lot of my friends let me make stupid decisions for them and four of them live in my neighborhood.
Speaker 1:Wow, what do you mean?
Speaker 2:I have three of my best friends live three blocks away, two blocks away and a block away.
Speaker 1:There's no way yeah.
Speaker 2:There's four of us in the same neighborhood and I'm still recruiting. I'm not done.
Speaker 1:Wait, wait, wait. Yes, you're telling me what. You sold them a property, yeah, was it a good?
Speaker 2:deal. I built one of my best friends a house. My other best friend built his own house and I'm building currently one of my other best friends a house right now.
Speaker 1:How does that work out? What if you build my house, things go wrong? Does it hurt the friendship?
Speaker 2:No, because it is what it is. I'm not upcharging them. Whatever it costs me to build, they're paying, so you're not even profiting.
Speaker 1:Nope, not no, no, no, no, no. Explain more.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm not even profiting, I just want to be. I want my friends to be near me and I want my kids to grow up with their kids. I think it's really important and I think having healthy relationships and you know you don't need to do everything in the world to make money right, I'm blessed to where I make more money than I ever thought I would in my life and I'm able to do for me.
Speaker 2:Having my friends and walking distance and being able to uh see them more and have our kids go to school together and be in the same environment, uh is important. You know, I'm I'm very, very, very lucky that I do have a good amount of friends, and uh, french friends were, were important to me my whole life. Right, I'm an only child and I have siblings. Uh, so it was. They're pivotal in my life because it allowed me to have these relationships with people that I can trust and experience life with and and see me for who I am and and not judge me.
Speaker 2:And then they've seen me over the course of my life, from the bonehead decisions I made up until not too long ago to where I'm at now, right, right, and they, they see what I've accomplished and what I've done and, uh, you know, I know they're proud of me and we're not like my boys and I were. We're not. We're men. We don't talk like. No one ever compliments each other. We bust each other's balls. Yeah, yeah of course but I know that like they're proud of me and they're happy for me and they're genuine for me and and all that stuff, so I just think it's important right.
Speaker 1:Let me ask you this how do you know that people? You know you're making success, you're making good money, you're in real estate. You came from middle class. Are you ever worried people are trying to take advantage of you?
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, and look trying to ride the golden goose. I mean, you can't live life like that right. Are people's intentions true or not? You're never going to know. You're never going to be inside their brains, inside their bodies to know. And what I tell people is I don't want to worry about what other people are doing, or or I can't control it. So if they are, eventually I'm going to sniff it out, yep, uh. And if I don't, then you know what Shame on me.
Speaker 1:But the reality is is.
Speaker 2:I don't live worrying about things I can't control. I worry about what I can control, and what I can control is what I control.
Speaker 1:That's it, and you go all in on that? Yeah, I'm all in, and if you burn me once, we're done it's dead.
Speaker 2:That's like I'm very cutthroat. Once we're done, we're done. It doesn't matter what you say, what like.
Speaker 1:I'm done. Done. Now you, I guess, kind of talking about relationships, something I've found. Uh, I really do care for people deeply, right, it's like it's who I am as a person. Yeah, uh, for better or for worse actually sometimes I think it's actually a major, major weakness 100.
Speaker 1:I'm the same way a big weakness, like you're saying, cutthroat, I give. I feel as though my one of my weaknesses, I give way too many second chances. Yeah now, I knew this shit wasn't gonna go well, I knew I should have cut it out, but man, I just wanted to help. And then it's like the weakness is like not we, it's like a hopefulness but it's like a savior complex.
Speaker 1:Almost now, let me show you this. You have a team right, like my night group right, based out of union yep. How does that work in dynamics with your team right? Your, your employees, your staff, you have, you know, you have admin. How does that work? How do you?
Speaker 2:like we are probably one of the tightest real estate groups that there is. Wow, I can confidently tell you that. I mean we hang out on almost a monthly basis. Um, I'm with 80 of them when I have parties, when I'm gathering to any. I mean, we're really close and that was intentional nice um, I mean, I have my team is the. I have one person that's 64 years old and I'm really close with him, like we're tight I. I see his wife and him.
Speaker 2:We go to dinner um today it's like one of my best friends and he's 64 right, yeah and then everybody else almost twice your age. Yeah, yeah, but but we have the same common interest. Yeah, so it works. And then, nice, everybody else on my team is 40 years old or younger but it's intentional right, we, we all hang out. I invite them to any gathering I have, any party I have.
Speaker 1:What do you do? Have you ever had someone that you had to let go on your team?
Speaker 2:I've had people where it didn't work out, where I wish it did. Yeah, that's what.
Speaker 1:I'm saying You're not being cruel, right? No one's going to stay with you forever. They're going to die one day.
Speaker 2:six months ago. I didn't. What do you mean by that? I wasn't really running into business, I just was just like, yeah, I got a real estate team, this is great. Yeah, whatever, I don't care, I don't care. Yeah we sold the house. Yeah, now I'm like really trying to run a business. Right, I didn, I just was in my mind. I was like I'm going to sell a house a year, I mean a house a day yeah. Yeah, I genuinely thought I was going to sell 365 houses.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I remember so stupid, so stupid, so stupid, so for those who don't know, I was at a Christmas party with Mike. I got to call it two years ago and that year the year prior, I think you sold like 200 plus 20 205 homes by himself. My top year was like 110 115, so he's like double and that's pretty good yeah, it's great and he's like doubling me. So I'm like holy shoot. And you say that to me like, oh, my goal is a house.
Speaker 2:Today, I remember yeah, I'm serious, yeah, I'm, you were yeah yeah, I thought you were committed, you were like this, I'm not giving up.
Speaker 1:yeah, and I said to you and that was um that year, like a few months prior, I had like a nervous breakdown. I was, I was so stressed I'm like listen, this is not life, nah.
Speaker 2:Like we gotta live.
Speaker 1:That's not life, and you were like I'm just gonna do it and then I'm gonna chill.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And I remember thinking I walked away. I literally called my wife in the car. I said I met this guy. Babe, I realized I have to have balance in my life because you showed me what I like, where my inevitable conclusion was going to be, yeah, that I just wanted more and more. I'm like I don't want that. I want to have a life right that's worth, and you're a coach, said yeah, when we met like he.
Speaker 1:No, that's not a life worth living. And when you said that I'm like, well, you think it is right because it's money. But man, money is, at a certain point, becomes very not worth it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I mean the the probably the best thing I've ever done in my life was six months ago. I went to mega camp uh in.
Speaker 1:Austin. Okay, what's mega camp.
Speaker 2:Meg camp is a Keller Williams event that people across the world literally the world go to Um and you hear the top people in the company speaking on stage about all their successes and things that work and their strategies of how they're generating business and you can implement things and the one thing that sucked with me was everyone.
Speaker 2:Everyone on this has a coach and I'm like damn, I'm really doing something wrong here, because my numbers are better than half the people talking. So now I'm pissed because I'm not on stage. I'm like I'm mad because I'm like you're not shit, I sell more than you. And then I'm like I'm not doing anything right and I'm actually like pretty successful imagine, so imagine if I knew what I was doing so what did I do?
Speaker 2:I walked out of the convention, I went right to the coaching booth and I said hi, my name is michael martin eddie, I want to hire a coach. They, they showed me a woman. I was like, okay, great, you're my coach, I'll hire you. And I was like, wait, I'm being way too impulsive. So then, so that is so that I recanted the coaching call with her. It felt awful because she was an amazing woman. And I ended up hiring my coach.
Speaker 1:Was it the same woman or no?
Speaker 2:No, not the same woman.
Speaker 1:Oh wow, Look at that. It wasn't meant to be.
Speaker 2:So I went with someone else that I got two coaches plus a coach for my director of ops, nice, I had to pay double, but no problem, I was fine and that was probably the best thing I've ever done In six months. I've completely changed my business. Talk to me about it. Yeah, so I mean I'm holding them accountable. We have weekly meetings. I actually know what I'm talking about at a meeting. Our team meetings were a joke. I would just come in and be like all right guys, what's working?
Speaker 1:All right, bye. Like there's no purpose, no accountability, wow, no goals.
Speaker 2:Like, yeah, we would just set goals, but there was no it was like make-believe yeah, yeah, it's like I feel like I should sell three. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, how would?
Speaker 1:you say you know what a whole thing about. Uh, this group, people see the numbers, you see success. Great. But how is like hiring a coach impacted your life?
Speaker 2:I mean, it just gives you, it changes. And here's the thing you have to be willing to be coached. And if you think that you know everything and you think that you got it all and like that, that it's stupid, it's not going to work. Yeah, it's not. It's not going to work If you go into, if you lift weights and you say I'm never going to get this weight up.
Speaker 2:I'm never going to do it, and if you fail, that's okay, you get back up, you try again. So I went into it not knowing anything. Now, mind you, if you interviewed me seven months ago and you told me you had a coach, I think you're an idiot.
Speaker 1:Yeah Right, this guy doesn't. I remember, like one thing that usually when I talk to people like how has real estate impacted your life? Well, I've had to grow a lot. You didn't even read.
Speaker 2:No, and I'm reading my first book right now. I'm three chapters in, which is a huge accomplishment. Come on.
Speaker 1:I've never read proud of you. Yeah, you know what are you reading uh rocket fuel rocket fuel great book by jr wickman uh, maybe, yeah, yeah, he wrote a book called uh attraction as well.
Speaker 2:It's really good book yeah, so my coach is making me read books like it's all and everything that that she so I have two coaches, so everything they're both doing Jordan and Shelby I'm implementing in my business and then I'm implementing it into my agent's business, and half my team is trajectory right now to have their best career year.
Speaker 1:So, paz, how does it make you feel to know that, because you decided to change, really reshape what your beliefs were, your team are going to be able to have finances that are going to really change your life?
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Because you build free houses. I'm sure the team's not building a few houses, right? So you're giving these guys opportunity that previously, frankly, you weren't giving them.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, for me it's everything right.
Speaker 1:How does it make you feel?
Speaker 2:I mean, it makes me feel great. I genuinely want them to be financially well and I think a lot of leaders in the world get caught up with just worrying about themselves and I think that's natural. I don't think that's not a natural thing, it's super natural. Yeah, I mean, if you're a strong-minded individual and you have a strong will and a strong work ethic, you're going to want the success and the things that come with success. But for me, yes, I want that, but I also really, really, really want for them, because they're choosing me just as much as I'm choosing them and ultimately, they all have a role in my success. So I want to have a role in their success and I want to try to make my role of their success bigger than their role in mine, because I feel like I owe it to them, because without all of their support, we wouldn't be doing this.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't be who I am, I wouldn't be in the position I'm in, I wouldn't have the money that I have, I wouldn't have the success that I have. I wouldn't have any of it, because every human has a has a ceiling and you're going to hit that ceiling and if you don't have other people that not only can trust that, you can trust that are willing to buy into your uh, your vision, that are willing to commit to it. Then you can only get so far, and they've all done that with me and they all view me as that. So I feel like somebody that's leading uh should be doing it two, x or more for them, because everything that they're doing has allowed me to live the dream I'm living now. So I'm doing, I'm giving them opportunities now to buy into my flips.
Speaker 2:They they get equity stakes, I'm giving them opportunities that they wouldn't necessarily have if they weren't with me, and it's so.
Speaker 1:how does that work? Let's say someone comes up hey, I'm flipping property at 50,000. Yeah, so pretty much.
Speaker 2:I just put it in my group chat. I said hey, uh, next flip. Whoever wants in, let me know how much. Whether it's a thousand dollars or 500,000, and whatever the property ends up selling for, I'm going to divide it by however much money each person get. Figure out the exact percentage. If it's 6.3, they're gonna get 6.3 of the profits oh nice, you know.
Speaker 2:Plus their money back, yeah, wow, so yeah, you know, and it's just I'm trying to teach them how to make money in other ways, other than just real estate. Yeah, right, or?
Speaker 1:like in the world real estate, but maybe not just commission correct.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah yeah, it's so funny. I've gone through this. I really push a lot of uh, my agents prior or at least two agents like, oh, we could do, and I actually pulled back one thing. I've learned the same thing with clients like I want to invest, I want to invest. You haven't been making money, no, like so okay, you want to invest in what? You haven't even figured out how to make like 150 000 if you can't make 150 000 dollars. You haven't figured out the skills how to market yourself etc, negotiate whatever it is. Yeah, to make that much in your sales. What are you going to do when you buy a property and then you need a new HVAC and the guy runs you the gambit? You were very different, right, because you had such a high amount of income so you could afford making mistakes.
Speaker 1:A lot of people they still are making the 80K as a realtor and it's brutal because it's not consistent. So right now, my team, what we're doing is we're getting everyone to a place of income and we have two realtors this year who should be buying the Lord willing on our team and then, okay, now that you've got that kind of income, let's bring it in. It's not this year, the following year, okay, let's bring it in, let's buy. But what you're saying with the partnership idea, I think is super cool.
Speaker 2:I honestly have to steal that. That's great. No, it's great, I mean, and it gives you too. Yeah, it does, yeah, yeah, I mean. It helps me, cause I could just buy more property. And it helps them cause now they're creating wealth in other ways and they're learning Right.
Speaker 1:And again, my team's young like we're young, we're all young, so any?
Speaker 2:knowledge I have, I'm giving it to them. And look, if one of them leave me one day because they want to do bigger and better things, is it going to suck? Yeah, it's going to suck, but the reality is I give them everything that I have, literally.
Speaker 1:I don't hold anything back so this one, I'll tell you I had such a difficult time people leaving, maybe it was unhealthy, etc.
Speaker 2:I really impacted me deeply I felt like abandoned right, and I think that's normal if you care about your people. So much.
Speaker 1:Here's what I've learned and it's really really helped me. This is what my business coach told me. I agree with the coaching. It's critical, he said. But it's actually my pastor. My pastor said to me every person. Because I told my pastor, hey, we're leaving, we're going to a different church. We moved, we love our church.
Speaker 2:It's very tight.
Speaker 1:We're leaving. He said Rob Parker and the Planet Church Mawa leave. It all depends how. Yeah, it's a huge difference. I've had team members leave this organization that they burned a bridge and I would not want them back here. I don't want them near anything business. Personally, forgive greg's, how great, but I don't want them anything near the business. And then I have had team members leave that we just had a team member leave and she came back yeah and six months later she came back. She made amends, but by what open arms come?
Speaker 1:on through, of course, right so um, what I've learned is like the, the framework, and it's going to happen. Right, and this is how real estate deeply impacted my life and taught me this every person is going to leave.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm not in control whether another person leaves like you're saying all I can do is my mindset with is you might is such a hard lesson for me to learn. Mike, I'm not, was like a. I took a whooping to learn this one, which is God. Put this person in my life for me to help them grow. If the pot I have cannot handle the tree or the plant anymore, they need to be replanted. The pot I have isn't big enough. So my job as a business owner is to create a huge world where realtors, where real estate professionals, where clients can come and thrive. And if my world is not big enough, it's not a bad thing. No shame on me. You outgrew me, that's great. Go, because either you're going to grow here or you're going to go out, because everyone in the real estate industry, we're all growth-oriented, of course. And if you're not growth-oriented, you're not making it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you picked the wrong profession. You got to always want to grow, always, every day. What am I reading? What am I learning? What am I lifting? What am I doing? Who am I taking out? Boom, let's do a pivot here. Relationships so you met Kate. What was that like, dating you and your high-income earner? How did you meet Kate? What was the whole?
Speaker 2:night she DM'd me, so I never did online dating. What?
Speaker 1:was the DM, do you remember? I don't. It's like, hey, can you help me get pre-qualified.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I don't. So she added me on Facebook and then I was commenting on her stuff and then she just DM'd me I think we were talking about Jimmy Fallon. I think Okay, fallon, I think okay, cool, and then we just started talking and then we went out and then, you know, life happened quick for us. I mean, she got pregnant three months into us just dating.
Speaker 1:Um wow, so you guys went from zero to a hundred. Yeah, but did you know each other beforehand or no? No, we didn't.
Speaker 2:Oh, so you guys went all the way, yeah so we were all in, yeah, yeah, um, but I don't think she really knew. I mean, I drove a nice car, so so that she knew I probably did well, but I lived home with your parents making $400,000 a year.
Speaker 2:Yeah and when we met, I was making a lot more than that. Yeah, but I don't. She didn't really understand because I hid it. Well, I had a nice car, but other than that, if you didn't see my car, like with what I wore and things like that, you would have where you spoke.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you'd have.
Speaker 2:You seem like an average guy yeah, you'd have no idea, right, um? And she, she didn't, she genuinely didn't know um. And then, yeah, like, like life happened. So you know, we had michael and I I had I basically was a father once. We started dating because she had mia and I had to step into that role and then when she got pregnant is when I moved out because I was giving myself till 30, so she spent my timeline up a whole year.
Speaker 1:Wow, so you're 29,. Pregnant with one.
Speaker 2:She's pregnant with one.
Speaker 1:Yep, gotcha. And then where'd you move out to the house?
Speaker 2:you bought yeah.
Speaker 1:That was a house you owned, though.
Speaker 2:So I actually flipped it. I knocked it down, I built like a 4,500 square foot house, happened, and then I was like, all right, well, we're moving in oh, you were buying it to flip it. It was on the market for sale. Covet happened literally four days later and then I found out she was pregnant a week later so you said, hey, pull it off the market.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we moved in.
Speaker 2:I bought my partner out and then I moved in wow, yeah, you bought your partner out. Add the priest value uh, how did that work?
Speaker 1:how does that work?
Speaker 2:I, so he had no financial money in it, he was just building it it for me.
Speaker 1:Oh, so you paid him. Yeah, you paid him what he owed 10, 20,000, whatever. Yeah, okay, blessed, because it wasn't worth anything because honestly it wasn't selling. Wow, because of COVID. Yeah, just literally chaos. Wow, okay, now that's so interesting. And now you, you're there with Kate she's pregnant, in the house. You guys only knew each other for a few months. How each other for a few months? How does that all work?
Speaker 2:it's tough man. It's not easy, right, especially with you.
Speaker 1:You work so much yeah, yeah I know you don't work as much people think you you're, yeah, but I still work.
Speaker 2:I work a lot right um no, it's not easy, man. I especially like for those that have children.
Speaker 1:Like kids only make life more difficult oh, for sure they don't make it easier, they make it full.
Speaker 2:It's a fuller life, but it's challenging yeah, I mean, and they'll make you argue over the dumbest things Just simply how you yell at the kid.
Speaker 1:That could be a whole other thing, but you guys didn't really get the chance.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm just realizing right now you didn't date, you didn't date no, no, we didn't date, nope you guys okay we're doing this, yeah, and then we had two more right after because I want them to be close in age, so you know so you said you were really going all in.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and she had the one from the previous marriage yeah, wow.
Speaker 2:So we dated for like a month and a half. You know, it just kind of happened that way. How did that impact you guys? What a story it's. It's not easy, man. It hasn't been easy, but you know we're we get through it you through it and you make it work because you can either quit or just fight through it. But no relationship's easy and a lot of people probably smoke and mirrors with their relationships, oh for sure. You know, you've got four little human beings that rely on you and you've got to do your best to make it work.
Speaker 2:But you know it's not easy.
Speaker 1:It's not easy at all Marriage, I tell everyone right now. It's the hardest thing you ever did Marriage is when you get married. Um another pastor said this. Uh, I said when you get married, you realize how selfish you are. Yeah A hundred percent.
Speaker 2:And then when you have kids, you realize how really, indeed much before like no I, she's only so I was dating a girl prior to her, um, but it was, you know, for a year, and then, prior to that I was just single, so I never really dated anybody while having money per se you know I was doing well, but all that money I dumped into a house so I didn't have money. So yeah, I was making it but I didn't have it yeah, house rich cash correct. Yeah, so no, what's it called?
Speaker 2:yeah, you're right, house for right yeah, no, I was oh, equity, equity cash for yeah, yes, yes, exactly wow and now.
Speaker 1:So I gotta ask, though she gets pregnant. When do you? When do you think it clicked to her that like, okay, this guy's like borderline work. I know now you've got much more structure, do you live in?
Speaker 2:bed. She didn't realize, really, honest to god, until like less than a year ago. We were on the couch watching TV and she genuinely looked at me and she said are we millionaires? It was serious, come on, I swear to God.
Speaker 1:No, where's Kay on the podcast? We've got to get you on.
Speaker 2:I swear to God, dude, and I'm not the best with time, so maybe it was a little longer than a year. Yeah, it was still but it was not long ago. Wow, yeah, she's just so different.
Speaker 1:And what did she do before she met you?
Speaker 2:She was a registered nurse on stroke and seizure floor. Oh my God.
Speaker 1:Yep, that's what you were saying. You came for the nurses, you saw her firsthand, yeah yeah, yeah, it's crazy, it's crazy. And now she's still working, or no?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so now she has she moved, does like Botox and stuff. Sweet, she's working.
Speaker 1:And much more flexible schedule probably.
Speaker 2:Yeah right, it's flexible schedule, just gets her out of the house, gives her something to do Very good, and it gives her her own identity. I was about to say that Very important, very important.
Speaker 1:My wife right now we're definitely I'm not the world's live here in Newark. My wife, I actually, to be honest with you, I do really like Newark. I wish I lived down the shore because I'm really picking up surfing. So, I would just like to go relax and have a slower pace of life. Yeah, of course, and the city. It's very hard to have a slow pace of life, you know how it is.
Speaker 2:It's so fast here. Clark is much slower than the city, much slower than this Much slower so but my the street from our building.
Speaker 1:She works in the church, so but for her, I've seen her. I'm so proud of her, honestly, because I've seen her really. She was staying at home mom for a little while and still she's primarily home, uh, because her job. But I've seen her really come alive, yeah, and I've seen her really thrive and like kind of being proud of herself and, you know, making an impact in her job and it actually is very beautiful, honestly it's really beautiful.
Speaker 2:It's extremely hard to be at home. Yeah, she's still a great mother, oh brother, it's, oh, my God. Yeah, I mean, I'm home two hours a day during the week and I'm like how the hell I'm looking forward to going to work, literally.
Speaker 2:I'm like, damn, it's almost bedtime and I get to go to work. Work, yeah, yeah, because you're right, man, these, my, my, our wives have it's a lot, bro. Yeah, I know, bro, I got three kids under four, like four, two and one. They're a disaster and they, oh, my god, it's a disaster, it's a nightmare nuclear yeah, yeah, it's, but it's great, yeah, it's great, it's a nightmare okay, so all right, let me.
Speaker 1:Let me ask you this how would you say, though now real estate I know the family life has been a lot has real estate impacted at all the marriage like that you see, or not so much, because you hear that a lot right in real estate that, yeah, you basically have no time for the wife, you can't do anything with your wife. Yeah, because you're working so much. How can you navigate that? It is still like I'm still figuring it out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm still trying to figure that's what I was going to say is I'm still trying to figure it out. I mean, uh, we, we just try to do things like a day night is really helpful. Yeah, yeah that we we try to go on like three, four, five vacations with the kids. The shore house helps because in the summer I go down thursday night after work, whatever time I'm done, or friday morning very early, and then you know we're there friday, saturday, sunday, come home monday or sunday night.
Speaker 2:So that breaks it up and then I'm not really tangibly working, um, but yeah, it's, it's tough, man, because it's like you got that you have work and then I like to do other things, like individually, like I like to play my sports. That keeps me sane, yeah, so it's, it's hard. Right now I just picked up golf and that takes hours oh, brother golf, brother golf, you know what they say.
Speaker 1:Golf is the murder of marriage. Yeah, it takes so long.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well it takes five, six hours play around a golf, it's crazy, but it's so wonderful. It is and it's great for business. So it's, you know it's hard.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Like you're, you're with other successful people that have knowledge, successful and try to learn from them and anything that I can, whether it's real estate or just life.
Speaker 1:Life. I think one thing I loved about your coach when I met I don't think you really you're a workhorse, right, yeah which is like there's a book I would recommend everyone read and I would recommend yourself definitely. Read this book After Rocket Fuel if you want to live a life with more joy and make more money on your time. It's called Buy Back your Time by this guy, dan Martell. The book basically talks about really doing a time audit and understanding what am I actually spending my time on, what brings me a lot of joy and makes me a lot of money, and how I'll only stay in that, on what brings me a lot of joy and makes me a lot of money, and how only to stay in that quadrant and really stay in that place of like joy and money and the things only you can do really so with that said, one of the things that he says is everyone has a threshold of pain.
Speaker 1:You won't grow into a business that is so much pain.
Speaker 1:That's what happened to me. I started sabotaging my business. I was like can I sell my business, Can I? You know I was stalling on big decisions, Of course, Right. Ah, Reality was the business. I grew, was so, became. I loved it, but it was so. I was really. A lot of entrepreneurs were actually addicted to chaos. Yeah, Of course yo guess what. Your life falls apart. Your kids hate you, You're sick, You're maybe, you're just not. You don't have like peace, inter-peace. You can't remember the last time you talked to God, right? You're just like living in a different world. You're going so fast and you're scared to slow down because you don't know what it would feel like to slow down. You don't know what it means to be slow, scary yeah, it is especially in our world our world.
Speaker 1:However, it's where longevity and fruitful relationships come. So the guy makes arguments. He's like to hire an ea right executive assistant to basically run your calendar. She runs his emails and basically, uh, he really advocates for like, like your example, right with the five vacations. He in the book really advocates for taking vacation with your spouse yeah, alone with the kids.
Speaker 1:That's what one of the things that spurred me. I told you that when my wife and I we left to go to Costa Rica with our kid and man dude, that rekindled our marriage like crazy. Yeah, I was like we haven't done this in years and I was like, whoa, we actually love each other. Yeah, we're actually friends. Yeah, we're more than partners, we're like. We actually like there was a reason why this worked out so well and there's a reason why it's working.
Speaker 1:So, all that to say, I think realistically, in real estate, you can get so consumed and not by you, I mean us, us as a human, as an industry and it can really take over every facet of your life and your identity, but it's important at all costs to like distinguish, distinguish is to like distinguish, distinguish, distinguish, distinguish, at least from how I view it. Distinguish, distinguish, distinguish, like okay, here's what I do, here's who I am. Like, I'm not my like income, I'm not my bank account, I'm not. Like that's not who God says I am. I'm actually like you know, I'm a husband, I'm a father right, I'm a child of God. Real estate fails tomorrow, I still am who I am. Yeah, if my client curses me off and fires me, I still am who I am. Right, at the end of the day, I got my wife, I got my kid, I got my god yeah and that's what I got.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you see what I'm saying, so it's like. But at the same time, I hear what you're saying too the like, the ambition, the drive. It's like, so innate, it's like. I love what I do, of course, yeah it's hard, so it's hard.
Speaker 2:It is hard, you know, but you, you change. Every two, three years. My whole life changes to things that I never thought Like. If you asked me three years ago like where I'd be, I wouldn't even had a fifth, 10th, 20th of my life program the way it is. I never would thought I'd be where I am. Yeah, two more kids, yeah, I mean that.
Speaker 2:And just like what I'm doing in business, where I'm at like just everything use my how I view things and you know, like I, I, you just evolve right, and if you're not evolving, then you're someone just gonna blow right by you. So you got to constantly be able to evolve, constantly able to pivot. Humans hate change. We don't like change. What human likes change nobody yeah, you're right. Every time I update an app and it works differently. I'm like, oh, my god, you know and then it's just like I figure it out, I'm like all right, it's not so bad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's funny, right? That's true. When the iOS updates my iPhone updates, I'm like why are we doing the updates?
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, we hate change.
Speaker 1:But like a week later it's great.
Speaker 2:It's not normal for humans, but those that can change and those that can pivot are the most successful people in the world. Yeah, that's, and pivot and change. Now I'm into coaching and I'm into trying to just be a better leader for my team, trying to be better for the kids, better for my wife, just a better overall person. But it's hard.
Speaker 1:No, okay, mike. One last question for you what is something you wish a younger version of you would know in order for you to have a more full life? Now, that's a good question.
Speaker 2:I mean, there's so much you know and you're young, so you get it. When you're young and you're starting to become successful and you're figuring it out on your own, you do so much wrong because you're you're immature in my, in my opinion, men aren't mature until they're like 30, 35 years old, right?
Speaker 1:I believe that, yeah, you know, women grow up at like 22 american men. American men, you take it, you take a guy in like Chinese man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, forget it, these guys are grown at 15. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but for American man, yeah, I mean.
Speaker 1:You take a Russian guy, you tell me the Russian guy yeah.
Speaker 2:For sure so, and I'll use myself as an example I'm still immature and I'm 33, right, I'm still not the maturity level of a 33-year-old, but I'm getting close, I'm closing the gap.
Speaker 2:I would just say that I wish I got into coaching at an earlier age and trying to learn from those that had more life experience and more doing the things that I was hoping to do, rather than trying to figure it out myself and having that pride that I'm going to figure this out. No one's helped me and F everyone, and I'm going to do it because nobody was there to help me and nobody wanted me to succeed. And if I just didn't have that mentality, I can confidently look at you right now and tell you my business would probably be double than what it is right now. Wow.
Speaker 1:Guaranteed, so kill the ego.
Speaker 2:Get a coach, live large and hire people to help you achieve what you want to achieve and I promise you you will get there so much faster and you can do things so much quicker than you believe. Right, and I look, my numbers are, they're, they're impressive and I got them to be impressive. But I hit my threshold of what my natural talent can get and I kept hitting it, and hitting it, and hitting it. And then you know what was happening people that chose to work with me and that I chose to work with them. They were being affected more than me. Yeah, because I'm still selling and making the money I'm making, but they weren't getting a good leader out of me, but they still saw something in me for whatever reason, to stay with me and then I finally have an aha in august of 2023?
Speaker 2:yeah, and now their worlds are changing and I think they see it.
Speaker 1:Imagine what it will be like in two years.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's two years. I think we're going to have a really good organization. I think I'm going to be a much better leader and hopefully change more people's lives in a positive way. Yeah, and that's probably the biggest thing that I've done wrong and I had an ego, without realizing I had an ego.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a really good book by Ryan Holiday Ego is the Enemy, and he talks about how ego is literally the death of his soul.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and I really didn't think I had one, because I wasn't arrogant At least I didn't think I was. I was always willing to help people. But there was just this thing like I genuinely believe that I sell 365 house in a year and that's all I cared about without realizing that that's really all I cared about and everything I was doing was trying to do that.
Speaker 2:And then I was like, dude, you're an idiot. First off, there's probably less than 100 people in the world that sold 200 house in a year. You should be happy with that and grow an organization and build a business, rather than trying to fulfill this stupid goal you said of selling a house every day. It's so stupid. It's just me. You know how many people I told yeah. You know how many people I told that, yeah, I probably thought I was a raging asshole. Yeah, I would have been like, hey, you're an asshole, but you know that's what I believed. And then I had an aha moment. Now I'm changing things right. Yeah, and the biggest thing, change right. It's never too late to change, it's okay. And it's never too late to say, hey, I screwed up or hey, I did this, you know, because I genuinely didn't think I had an ego, but I did. I just didn't know it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I wasn't aware that I'm not gonna add to it. That is a perfect, you know perfect way to end yeah in a real estate, especially when you have success quickly as you did. The ego is the enemy 100. Ladies and gentlemen, we have michael martinetti. Please follow him everywhere. He's building his social. We love him, adios.
