Gabby Reece: Consistency, Divorce Papers & Epic Marital Victories

Welcome to the Coop, where today we're hanging out with none other than the sensational Gabby Reece! She's not just any beach volleyball player—she's a three-time All-American, Olympian, the first female to cut a Nike shoe deal, and a New York Times Best Selling Author. Oh, and did we mention she's smoking hot and graced the covers of Elle, Shape, Women's Sports & Fitness, and even Playboy?

In this episode, we're diving into the rollercoaster ride of Gabby and Laird Hamilton's marriage, discovering how they've weathered the storms and emerged stronger than ever. Gabby's secret sauce? Consistency. From keeping it loose in life to staying strong in body and mind, she's got it dialed in—complete with scheduled sex every other day! Plus, she's giving us the lowdown on tackling the next chapter of life, including facing the empty nest, dialing up her career, and contemplating a little plastic surgery (when the time is right).

Get ready to soak up Gabby Reece's wisdom as she shares her journey with clarity and truth. 

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Follow us on social media @thecoopwithkithoover for behind the scenes content, teasers and updates. 

Keep up with Gabby Reece on Instagram @gabbyreece and check out her amazing podcast, The Gabby Reece Show, wherever you listen to podcasts.

This episode was produced by Kit Hoover and Harper McDonald. Our Technical Producer is Christian Brown, and this episode was edited by Christian Brown. Business Development by Casey Ladd.

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Transcript

This transcript was generated automatically and reviewed by Harper McDonald. Its accuracy may vary. 

–

Kit Hoover:

Welcome to the Coop with Kit. My name is Kit Hoover. And I’ve been lucky enough in my 30 years in this business to interview some of the most iconic badass women out there. 

THESE remarkable women are now coming to the Coop. And we all know that girlfriends give the best advice. We are diving into career, marriage, kids, sex, aging. All of it. 

I believe that at this next stage, we are just hitting our stride.  

Alright my chickens. Let's get into it.

–

My guest today is none other than Gabby Reece. Gabby is one of the most accomplished beach volleyball players in the world. She was the first female athlete to cut a shoe deal with Nike. She’s a New York Times Best Selling Author, has graced countless magazines covers even Playboy.

She is the OG of wellness, a podcast pioneer, Mom of 3 and married to big wave surfer Laird Hamilton.

Today, we uncover so much about this 6 foot 3 goddess. Consistency is her magic sauce. Get ready to be inspired.

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All right, let's rock and roll. First of all, Gabby,

Gabby Reece:

Okay. You're like, yeah, I do 17 shows a week. It's like, holy cow.

Kit Hoover:

Wasn't it so fun to see you and Laird together when y'all came on? I've been lucky enough to interview you throughout the years, and I just love your backstory. That was really cool for me to see you all together.

Gabby Reece:

Kit. How long have I known you? 20? I don't know. A long time.

Kit Hoover:

20 plus. Yeah. By the way, you're way ahead of the curve with so much stuff. I mean a total ceiling breaker. I love your podcast. How many years has it been now for the Gabby Reece Show?

Gabby Reece:

I'm going into four years, but then I did a podcast for two years prior to that as well.

Kit Hoover:

What was that one called?

Gabby Reece:

The Truth Barrel. We did everything in a sauna.

Kit Hoover:

Well, Welcome to the coop.

Gabby Reece:

Thank you.

Kit Hoover:

I love something you said on your podcast talking about that you were a serious minded person and your goal for 2024 was to try to get loose. What does that look like for you, Gabby? Because you come to the right place, The Coop is loose.

Gabby Reece:

Kit, I mean, you look like everything is fun for you. I think for me, honestly, I don't spend too much extra energy reacting to things that don't really matter or haven't happened because then that just leaves more space for enjoyment versus you're living in your mind and thinking about, oh, the million details or what you think is going to happen. And so I'm really guilty of that. So in my case, it might just be getting out of my head and responding to what's really happening, not all the millions of plans or worries that I've created.

Kit Hoover:

So how do you do that? What's the key to doing that?

Gabby Reece:

I think the good news is experience. I think you do it the wrong way enough times and you go, man, this is not serving me or anyone around me very well. So it's like anything, it's just a practice. So every time it creeps up or you get the temptation, you go, this isn't even a real thing, so why am I going to worry about it? And it comes down to even how you respond and not taking myself in that way. So serious, just kind of being like, is this really a big deal? It's not a big deal.

Kit Hoover:

How does your family help you get loose?

Gabby Reece:

My family? I mean, come on there. Half the reason I worry about. No, I'm just kidding.

Kit Hoover:

Totally. 

Gabby Reece:

Their the ones who beat you into submission

Kit Hoover:

A hundred percent. 

Gabby Reece:

They look at you and they're like, oh, you're doing that again? And all I need is young adult daughters that look at you and you want to be a good example. But I use them as a reflection of all the ways that I could be better because I think they're another iteration of people who are in so many ways are smarter and ahead, because maybe even if we did our jobs, we provided that opportunity for them to be freer with less baggage. But then it's also the true reminder like, Ooh, I have some work to do.

Kit Hoover:

I always say, my kids are the ultimate humblers. If you want to be able to laugh at yourself or to laugh at a situation or a major parenting fail, when you think everything's kind of going well, it turns on a dime. 

Gabby Reece:

No, it's crazy. And I think my husband does it because he's really good at sort of his New Year's resolution every year is to laugh more and have more fun. So I think one of his goals is to have fun. That's never a goal of mine. So just the fact that I live with somebody who's one of their goals is having fun. So I think that helps.

Kit Hoover:

That's why we're supposed to be best friends. Gabby, I'm your Laird in a small version. That's sort of my goal every day. Gabby, one word to describe where you are in your life right now.

Gabby Reece:

One word I think I'm letting go.

Kit Hoover:

I love that. And why? What do you mean by that?

Gabby Reece:

I spent so much of my life, grinding, willing, organizing, planning, pushing, lifting, doing all these things and the notion of allowance and flow, and I think more of that is necessary and little kids are exhausting, but then teenagers are the ones that can have a really profound impact. For example, I interviewed somebody today who's a master negotiator conflict resolution, and it's like, Hey, it's about listening and the intention is never winning. And so I think I've come to a place in my life where there's just more letting go because then maybe also it's less restrictive. So you maybe even will allow more to come in versus trying to push for it to happen.

Kit Hoover:

I always say loosen the grip on the bat. I'm a clinger and hold on. And high energy. I think that's with age though, Gabby. Do you find that true? I think in our fifties and maybe again with the kids getting up and some out of the house learning to let go. What do you do in your life that helps you let go?

Gabby Reece:

I had to get tools, to be honest. One of my girls maybe seven, eight years ago was going through some stuff and I actually went to a woman named Byron Katie. She has a program called The Work. And the first question on the work, there's four, is it true? So I think you do that enough and you go, this is so silly to live like this, and in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the thing that's in front of me, which is my life. And hopefully you'd think that we're learning from our life. So I think that that's the other thing is I do try to be a good student. I only have to bang my head against the wall a few times and then I go, okay, so is it surrendering? Is it letting go? I don't know. Whatever word we want to use.

Kit Hoover:

Well, I love all the knowledge I get from your podcast, and when I think about you, Gabby, one thing's so cool too. You're the OG wellness guru. You've been doing this wellness guru work before anybody that I knew. So for our listeners, if there was one piece of advice you could share with anybody listening right now that they could start today to do for wellness better, life better, 2024, what would it be?

Gabby Reece:

Consistency is king. So it's consistently eating things that support you versus not. It's consistently moving your body. It doesn't mean killing yourself. It's consistently trying to get to bed at a reasonable hour. It's consistently trying to manage stress consistently, trying to be connected to your loved ones. But listen, there's no secret. We all know we need that practice. We need that consistency in place and it's not something we do. It blows my mind that people still are like, oh, well I haven't figured it out. We know what to do. We do. So get a friend who you have to be accountable to.

Kit Hoover:

Who's that friend for you?

Gabby Reece:

I think being married to Laird is super helpful. It's a built-in motivation. I'm like, God, look at that guy. Go, I should probably do something. But what I do do is I invite friends, they can come and work out with me wherever I am. And so I know, Hey, it's eight 30, it's eight o'clock, whatever. I've got to start because they're here.

Kit Hoover:

Well, fitness and wellness is such a huge thread in your podcast. Has there been a big aha moment for you?

Gabby Reece:

I will say this. One thing that I really get excited about is whether I'm talking to literally a psychiatrist or psychotherapist or endocrinologist or you name it, I've talked to all kinds of doctors, it still comes down to a few things. It comes down to your gut health, avoiding chronic inflammation. It comes down to staying insulin sensitive. It comes down to your metabolic and your mitochondrial, your cells function. And finally it comes down to community and connection. So whether you're trying to do weight management or stay sane or have good heart health or avoid diabetes, it all pretty much derives from the same things. And so it's not an aha moment, but it certainly was like this is very clear over and over and over. I'm hearing the same thing.

Kit Hoover:

Alright, everything you just said right there is what makes your podcast so great. So valuable. Wow. But right now, Gabby, let's just jump for a second. I want to get into your marriage and your love story with Laird. Well, we talked about this when the book came out, which is fantastic, but let me see if I have this right. You meet Laird, you move in eight days later, married two years later, divorced three years later now back together and more connected than ever. So is that the correct trajectory of your story?

Gabby Reece:

It's super close. Laird moved in with me. He lived in Hawaii. I lived in California and then we were married two years from the day we met. We were almost divorced, the papers were filed, but in California you have to wait six months. And so we were actually never divorced. We've been married for over 26 years. We didn't have great skills going into our marriage. We didn't have great examples. I say it's like learning dance steps and we were kind of stepping all over each other's toes quite a bit. And I think he gave me a lot of room. I certainly was maybe more scared than Laird. And so my tendency was like, I'm going to run away. And he was pretty still and was like, are you done with all of that? And it was like, do you want to work on this or not? And so I remember thinking that it was something really worth feeling vulnerable. I really think that that was the hardest part for me was it's a risk, right? It's all a risk and it's so worth it. And I had to learn to be a little braver.

Kit Hoover:

I think it's one of the most beautiful love stories. I really do. And you know why? Because it's honest. It's honest. So to have an honest depiction of what it is. But let's go back for you to the beginning. Y'all said it was love at first conversation. Do you remember the first thing Laird said to you?

Gabby Reece:

It's just that I interviewed Laird. So as you know Kit, sometimes you interview people and maybe they learn something about you in the process of you interviewing them. And so I think Laird was kind of rough around. He is rough around the edges, but coming from sports and I really did my homework and all these things, Laird was much more open and generous once the interview got going and that's how it went because we're not two people to meet and be like he's attractive or she, I think she's pretty now we're in love. We're kind of not wired that way. It would have to be something about the individual. And I remember saying goodbye to him after the interview and feeling like that is a very unique and special person and I didn't realize what was going to happen.

Kit Hoover:

What about the proposal? How did he propose to you?

Gabby Reece:

There was no formal proposal. I think when Laird and I got together, it's weird. It was a deep knowing. There was never a knee down or any of that stuff. What

Kit Hoover:

Do you mean a deep knowing? You just knew, you just talked about it and like, oh, we're just going to be married.

Gabby Reece:

I think so, and I was playing ball and I was pretty busy. I used to tell my friends I would never be a girl who's like, I wonder if he's going to ask me to marry him. I think I thought I would be quite the opposite. And in fact, I maybe wasn't even interested in marriage. But I think with Laird and I certainly after a few months of being together, it was pretty clear. And Laird is very clear. Laird is a very direct and loving and intense person. So I wasn't confused about his intentions.

Kit Hoover:

That is sexy clarity and a focus where you're not questioning that I find extremely sexy.

Gabby Reece:

I think for me personally anyway, as a female, just let me know. I don't want to guess because then I'm never going to be like, where were you? Or I don't want to do any of that. I want to have your back and support you and be like, go pursue your passions. And lad is, I always joke that he's not capable of being dishonest. Even times when you're like, you could be a little. So I think that gives me a lot of comfort and power of calmness.

Kit Hoover:

The wedding, did you have bridesmaids? Was it a big ceremony?

Gabby Reece:

Could you see me? No, we were married. There was about

Kit Hoover:

Come on. Yeah, I see purple taffeta…

Gabby Reece:

Can you imagine? I live in Kauai on the Hanalei River, and we actually married Laird, connected two double hull canoes and decorated them with a platform and all these flowers and they brought me out on another canoe and put me on the platform and we were on the river. There was about six or eight of us, and then I had a bathing suit underneath a white dress. And then we Laird picked me up and we jumped in the river after.

Kit Hoover:

Did you have a bachelorette party?

Gabby Reece:

Oh no. I really love women so deeply, but if you go we're going on a girls trip, I am like, yeah, no, I'm good.

Kit Hoover:

Tap out.

Gabby Reece:

Yeah, and it's funny because playing in athletics and being around a lot of powerful women, I love it, but I don't want to take a trip and just be like, it's only for the girls and we're going to be kicking our heels up and doing this thing.

Kit Hoover:

Okay, so you get married, things are going well. What happened? Tell me about the moment when you decided to file for divorce. What was going on?

Gabby Reece:

Well, we were at that time separated. So Laird went back to Hawaii and I stayed in California. And because he has this weird kind of old fashioned this, he's like, well, if we're not going to be together, he likes things to be very clear. He is not an in and out guy. He's like out of respect for if this is what you want to do, then you have to file. Because then he thought it would make it look like I was at least doing it versus he was doing it. And so I remember filing and we were apart for about another three months after that. He came through California to get snowboarding gear to go up. He was going to Alaska someplace, heli-boarding, and we had to see each other. His gear was up at the house. Something interesting happened for me there, we have these circular stairs in my house and Laird is very generous in his love, very attentive.

And when he left, I remember standing at the top of one of the stairs and he walked down and then went out of view in the stairs. And it dawned on me at that moment that Laird was being generous with his love, that he could stop also, that he could in fact move on. And I think sometimes maybe younger women, sometimes you forget what a strength it is when your partner can be like, yeah, no, I'm here, right here for you. We misconstrue that as like, oh, they're always going to love me, or they cannot not love me. And I remember him walking out of sight and it really, I was like, oh, wait a second, was a real opportunity. And so we kind of worked our way back. It was very bumpy and ugly. And also during the process, if we're talking about being direct, Laird used to drink wine pretty much every night. And so he had his own decisions to make about if that was going to be something that he wanted to continue to do.

Kit Hoover:

Didn't you give him a name when he would drink?

Gabby Reece:

Larry?

Kit Hoover:

Larry? Sorry, not to make light of it. 

Gabby Reece:

No you can. I mean, am I allowed to swear? It was fucking insane.

Kit Hoover:

Yeah, fucking hysterical.

Gabby Reece:

Larry is the safest guy no matter what state he's in, but it was a look, I mean you've seen him when he's dead sober. He's a very, he's kind of on the edge. We joke. It's like, could he be in jail or he's just really good at his sport, which way could it go? He's one of those, right? And he found things that made it work, but he had stuff to work out. So it wasn't like we got back together and it was like, this is amazing. It was like we had some stuff to work out,

Kit Hoover:

But we all agreed Larry had to go to go. Larry is out.

Gabby Reece:

Larry had to go. And so that even took a few more years after that. I was like, listen, I just can't do that anymore. But I had vowed that I would communicate my real feelings because before I hadn't done that. So I just said, it's totally up to you if it's too boring, maybe to not drink or whatever you need to do. We have a family, we'll do it together, but I can't do this. And then lad made the decision, I guess about 17 years ago that it was like, yeah, this isn't working. And he just went and stopped drinking alcohol. What was tricky about it is he was home every night. He was in bed before nine, but he would drink from four 30 to six 30. So sometimes that's a weirder because it's fuzzy and you're like, is this not good or not good?

Kit Hoover:

Well then he'd be up so early surfing, he'd do whatever. So it looked like killing it.

Gabby Reece:

Yeah, killing it. It was wild.

Kit Hoover:

So what tools did you use during that time to put it back together? Was there tangible stuff that our listeners can take? Was there anything specific?

Gabby Reece:

It was this, Laird has a very good character. I know what type of human being he is. And so when things would get bumpy in my mind, I would focus on his character and where I thought he was going to try to work towards. And it's not about living in someone's potential, right? Because we've all heard that if he would just do this, they say, if you say the word should, you've left reality.

Kit Hoover:

I like that. It's so incredible how you two have put in the work and come out on the other side so beautifully. And I'm thinking about you two as a couple. Do you have funny nicknames for each other? What do you call each other?

Gabby Reece:

No, I call their lover, but

Kit Hoover:

That's cute.

Gabby Reece:

Yeah, it is. I don't know if it's still cute that we have very large children and I'm in my fifties, but it's just what I call and if I call them honey or sweetie, I think it's a no go. That's another joke. Laird's mother passed away many years ago and he said to me very early in our marriage, he's like, I had a mother and she died. And so Laird has also made it very clear, and it's actually something I like is we're not brother and sister. Sometimes we are business partners and that has its own set of interesting dances, but it's like how do you keep the dynamic, the chemistry, the love, the passion. You feed that as well.

Kit Hoover:

Do you treat him like your boyfriend? He's made it very clear that you are his girlfriend and that's how he treats you.

Gabby Reece:

I do. And I always say that I don't talk to any person better than I talk to Laird. I'm very mindful of treating him with the most respect of any person in my life because it would be the easiest person to not do that with. So rather than making that a crapshoot, I have just made the decision that this is the person I'm going to speak to in the highest regard and stay committed to that because it's sort of like your training life. It can be the first thing to go. And so I feel that that's so important to me.

Kit Hoover:

Wow. If there was one thing to take away with regards to any partnership, it would be what you just said right there, Gabby. That is so inspiring and tangible. Alright, now I hate to be vacuous, but I'm staring at you in the monitor. So before we move on, Gabby, why does your skin look good? What are you doing?

Gabby Reece:

Mine? Oh, I think it's supplementation and I never drank alcohol. I haven't drank my adult life. I think that's been helpful. But also my dad is not alive, but he was from the Caribbean, so my dad was half black and half white. So I do think that has protected my skin.

Kit Hoover:

Yes, it's flawless.

Gabby Reece:

Well, no, it's not flawless, but I have makeup on. But it's holding. It's holding, it's holding up. It's holding, it's holding.

Kit Hoover:

Gabby. This shit's going south on me. 

Gabby Reece:

I always joke like I try to be as natural as possible, but I'm like if it goes down, if the face falls, I'll just get it yanked one time, one and done.

Kit Hoover:

Wait, you and I are somewhere. I'm always bragging. I'm on natural. I'm going to lean in. I love it. But now it's starting to, I'm like, am I?

Gabby Reece:

No, no one and done one and

Kit Hoover:

Done.

Gabby Reece:

Pick a good person, pull it up. I have no problem saying that because it's not like I'm chain smoking and doing everything and be like, just fix it at the doctors. It's like, Hey, I'm doing everything I can.

Kit Hoover:

I like that one and done. And then just ride it out.

Gabby Reece:

Ride it out.

Kit Hoover:

Yeah. What would Laird think?

Gabby Reece:

Laird would be against it, but then somehow wouldn't they be like, you look so pretty. 

Kit Hoover:

Oh, somebody looks so good over here. What does date night look like for you guys? Who plans it? 

Gabby Reece:

So date night, we're not date nighters. I know it's lame.

Kit Hoover:

What about sex? Do you guys have to schedule sex because you still have kids at home? 

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Kit Hoover: 

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Kit Hoover:

What about sex? Do you guys have to schedule sex because you still have kids at home? 

Gabby Reece:

So we don't do date night and yes you do because, and it's so not sexy. I know. No, because people love this idea of spontaneously. I'm like spontaneous when, so I think it's sort of understood that if there is windows in the afternoon that both of us can collide, we will. I don't know. So maybe I'm a little too practical in that sense. I sort of think I'm interested in connecting with you. The rest is secondary

Kit Hoover:

In my mind. You guys are a seven day a weeker. In my mind. It's part of your workout routine.

Gabby Reece:

I'd say if I'm being truthful, it's probably about every other day. 

Kit Hoover:

Wow, well done. God, you got a big applause from The Coop over here.

Gabby Reece:

But it's had a lot of shades. So when you have new kids or little kids, I used to, I tried to upkeep that sort of schedule. It felt like it really was agreeable, especially for Laird. But that's helped me I think as a female I could let it kind of blow by the wayside and be like, I'm busy, I'm tired, I'm this, I'm that. But he's been the one to help me sort of realize that it's important. But other couples, everybody's different. Some people, I have couple friends that are couples that they want to go to beautiful dinners and just really doll of that. And I just say to Larry, be nice to me all the time. I don't need trinkets. And if we have a regular kind of intimate life, we're okay.

Kit Hoover:

I think we're cut from the same cloth. I definitely need the fun. Yeah. So Gabby, let's play a little game. Let's get random. Here we go. What's your morning routine?

Gabby Reece:

So I get up and the first thing I do is when I go downstairs, lair to has emptied the dishwasher. This started when our kids were little so that I could start right into who's getting what food or whatever. And he has a coffee waiting for me and we sit at our counter for about, I'd

Kit Hoover:

Have sex right there.

Gabby Reece:

It's called adult foreplay, emptying a dishwasher and coffee. So we sit and we just visit for about 25 and usually the sun's coming up and we can sort of look, do all that. And so that's just time to connect and we talk about stuff and then it goes usually straight into training.

Kit Hoover:

That's the greatest morning I've ever heard. This is unbelievable.

Gabby Reece:

Yeah, they're good. I mean it's really a gift. I often say sometimes being an entrepreneur or being self-employed has its ups and downs, right? You're really always on the hustle and you have to be disciplined in your scheduling. But the great thing is, is you can create these little windows that you realize are a true gift.

Kit Hoover:

Okay, next question. Is there a sport you can't play?

Gabby Reece:

A sport? Well, I'm opposite of you as far as gymnastics and getting inverted. I don't love that.

Kit Hoover:

I can't even touch my toes. I know I look like a gymnast at five feet, but I'm with you. Yeah,

Gabby Reece:

But it's like that whole going upside down. I used to make myself do handstands against the wall just to get upside down. It made me so uncomfortable. So I started forcing myself to do that in my thirties. I hated it so much.

Kit Hoover:

But you took up golf, you got to tell me at what age and literally almost made the tour, became a professional golfer. That is so incredible.

Gabby Reece:

Oh, I was so far from the tour. I was 30,

Kit Hoover:

Not in my mind, but

Gabby Reece:

I was really practicing and grinding it out. The whole idea was I was experimenting with a technique in golf and they were like, let's see if you could get your card. And then I had my second daughter and I remember going to the range and my friend George Cus used to hold debate and I was like, this is not working. There's golfers who could start early and then have kids and do it. Someone like me who was starting from scratch, it was a no go. Golf is a very humbling game.

Kit Hoover:

I just started it. It's so frustrating.

Gabby Reece:

Why you have too much energy for golf. What are you crazy?

Kit Hoover:

The opposite reason, Gabby, I'm so high intensity, right? Everything I do is all out Mach 10. Golf is yoga to me. I'm singular focused. I'm solo out there. I go early in the morning before anybody's there. I don't know, it's sort of become a little internal thing for me. I suck ass, but I'm into it. I shouldn't have say suck ass. 

Gabby Reece:

Do you run from hole the hole? Are you one of those people who has a little backpack, golf clubs and you just run? I can see it.

Kit Hoover:

I will. I'm not even out there. But you know what I do? I do my lesson and it's at the Rose Bowl and then I run the three miles after just to clear my mind. So you have me pegged. What is in your bedside drawer?

Gabby Reece:

Maybe some blue block glasses and some sleep, some kind of tincture or tonic for sleep. I'm not a great sleeper.

Kit Hoover:

Not I would think with all your exercise 

Gabby Reece:

I know.

Kit Hoover:

I feel like you have all the tools for a good night's sleep. What's that about?

Gabby Reece:

I mind grind.

Kit Hoover:

Mind grind

Gabby Reece:

Or I can go to sleep, but I can't stay asleep. And it's always been like that. My whole life, the way I grew up, I didn't have a ton of feeling of safety. And so I think I've always been a one eye and then you start having kids and how you do that one eye forever because they're up. And so it's just something that I've always been try to be diligent about. So I try to go to bed around the same time each night and I take magnesium glycinate, which is the one to help you sleep. And it's cool, it's dark, but I still jump through hoops.

Kit Hoover:

Do you and Laird spoon? That would be a hell of a looking spoon.

Gabby Reece:

I don't want Poor Laird, I don't want to snuggle. I don't want a toe on me. Do not touch me. I just need space to sleep. And laird's like big heavy bones. I'm like, don't put your knees near me. It's just like, yo, there’s limits.

Kit Hoover:

What do y'all sleep in?

Gabby Reece:

I used to sleep in little nightgowns, but they get all twisted up now. I seem to sleep in a pair of men's underwear and either no top or I will wear a kind of soft supportive bra and laird's in drawers. When I met him, he used to sleep in surf shorts and I'm like, listen. He's like, in case I have to get up and go. And I'm like, yeah, no, you cannot wear surf shorts to bed.

Kit Hoover:

But you and men's underwear and topless, there's nowhere. Laird is not coming over there with a knee or a hand or something that's hot. Gabby, I got to up my game.

Gabby Reece:

But he is tired. He does sleep. So I'm sure in his mind he's like, that would be amazing, but I'm too tired.

Kit Hoover:

There's two pictures I want you to break down for me. One, there's that picture of you guys nude, you're on the paddleboard and he's standing over you nude. I think it was for ES, espn, the Body Issue. Please tell me about that shoot.

Gabby Reece:

So Laird is, I know it's like he's never wearing shoes in this, but he's very modest. So we're on a board that's way too small for two people. It's kind of a one person. It's big, but it's really not for both of us. And I'm heavy. I weigh 180 pounds. So we go out, I've known the photographer Peggy Sheroda since 1988. Laird knows her a very long time as well. She's amazing. So he is so pissed at me that I have said yes to this and I'm like, but the picture's going to be pretty. And he's like, is this what it's come down to is this is what our job is. We're taking naked pictures and wearing this. And some guy was sitting there and lad's like, you can go now on the ski. You don't need to be here. He was so mad at me and he was paddling and I was trying to look all relaxed and chill for the camera, but inside he was, if you look at his face, he looks pretty intense and he's trying to paddle my 180 pound butt on a board that's too small. So it was pretty funny

Kit Hoover:

And I was worried about him with, you had to get a right angle, so nothing showing. I was like, oh God. You know what I mean? Oh yeah. I mean one strong stroke with that. 

Gabby Reece:

He was, not, believe me, he was like, he literally said to me, is this what our career has come down to?

Kit Hoover:

It was the hottest picture. Playboy. I loved your cover. Tell me about the decision to do it, how it was for you.

Gabby Reece:

So I was 30 years old, so I sort of felt like I was an adult. And what happened is I worked with a photographer named Philip Dixon that I had shot with since I was 18. Playboy was super generous. We controlled the whole thing. It was us, no hair, no makeup. It was myself, Philip, his assistant. Philip took the pictures, put the pictures in the order, gave it to Playboy and I never actually thought they'd put 'em out. I had a guy come up to me in the gym and he goes, I saw your Playboy pictures, and they just weren't. And I'm like, pornographic enough? And he's like, yeah, because Philip likes women and form. And so even though you were nude, it was like me in a rock. It was a different, my girls have seen it. I didn't really have an issue with it. For me it was the form of the body.

Kit Hoover:

Oh, it was powerful. It was beautiful. When you look in a mirror, what do you see?

Gabby Reece:

Kit, it's interesting as I get older, and I tried to practice this even when I was younger, but I think being in fashion and being in sport at the same time was a great educator for me, which was, first of all, it's an illusion, it doesn't exist. I've seen pictures of myself that I was like, I don't look like that. So I learned that really young, which was helpful because it's like, Hey, back up because you're never going to win that race. It's a no go. So I think that was really, really helpful for me. But it doesn't mean as you get older you're not like, huh, okay, I see the changes. All I do is I go, I'm going to be grateful for the fact that I'm healthy and I'm going to keep perspective. I was joking with you earlier. If I really hate something about myself for real, I'll take care of it. But in the meantime, I'm going to focus on my purpose, my relationships, doing all I can do to feel good and look good. And usually that takes care of a lot of my bullshit. I'm getting older or my jowls, whatever it is. Usually when I'm feeling pretty good or I'm doing good work and I'm feeling I've got some good love and my kids and I are in a decent flow, a lot of that, some fine lines and stuff bother me a lot less.

Kit Hoover:

I totally agree. I love your honesty on this. It's easy to say, oh, I'm just going to lean into it. We all have a little bit of vanity. The athlete in us though, I think there's a drive in me that I'm so full of gratitude that being able to run in college have three kids holding up kind of decently, it still gets you. But Tina Turner said it great. She said she wants to age gratefully. And I just love that. Not gracefully, right? I might come sliding in, left, right and center, but gratefully and kind of laughing I think is such the way. Do your kids have that?

Gabby Reece:

Yeah, I think the best we can do is model that. I just try to have compassion and remember how hard that age is and then be a good example.

Kit Hoover:

Comparisons the thief of joy. There's no statement truer, I think for everybody. Did you always want to be a mom, Gabby?

Gabby Reece:

I didn't want to be a mom. I grew up in the Caribbean. I was an only child. I wasn't around a bunch of kids. But I think when I met Laird, it really brought that side of me being more nurturing and quite frankly probably a biological drive. I saw him and I was like, and it's interesting because when I had my first child, I remember thinking, oh, who knew I was going to enjoy having a baby so much? I remember thinking when I was pregnant, they just come out three and tell me what they want and then they hand you a baby and you're like, I don't know what to do, but I know I'm going to figure something out here. And it was really a magical thing for me. But no, and even now it's like I'm trying to be the parent that is still reflective of who I am as a person.

I see tons of parents and I'm like, man, they look like they're doing that really? Right? And that's still not who I am. So it's also, and maybe you've experienced this, it's like how am I me and trust myself enough to be a mom and honor the way I'm going to do it and appreciate the way other people do it because I'm not the one who has the most creativity and we've got tables and we're doing all these things. I just have something else to offer my children. So I think you're always making peace with that and trying to do better where you know can,

Kit Hoover:

How would your daughters describe you?

Gabby Reece:

Annoying. No, that's my anger. It's a great question. I think I'm someone you can count on. I think you know what you're going to get. And I think I've tried really hard to be consistent. And one thing my girls know, and it's all an experiment, I could be wrong, is I think that they, even though they don't agree with me all the time, is I'm trying to understand each of their languages and inspire them in their way, which they're all very different. And I am trying my best to figure out how to connect in with them in their language and be someone that is not going to surprise them. They sort of go, I know how she's going to respond. I know that there's a solidness that I can provide them so that they feel like they can go off in the world and do and be whoever they are.

Kit Hoover:

There's that word again, consistency. I love that. That's your thread. I can't wait to really think about that. I don't think I've heard that before and it's such a tangible thing, harder to get in a practice with discipline, but the way you've worked it into everything, whether you've noticed it or not, even your sex every other day. I know consistency.

Gabby Reece:

Well, I'm a Capricorn, so supposedly this is a trait of people of my sign.

Kit Hoover:

I'm a Leo, we're off the rails. What is my thing, Gabby? I need your help. 

Gabby Reece:

You’re doing it great. You've got a lot of life. That's the thing is when you see people who have high vitality, man, that is a real gift and really, really powerful. And so it's important because it's also sometimes can be such a spark for so many people around you.

Kit Hoover:

Well, thank you for that. I think we need to do something just our height alone and same age and yeah, we don't have to do the weird girls trips, just you and me. Empty nest is coming for you and for me. How are we feeling about that? What are your thoughts?

Gabby Reece:

I'm ready to work more, quite frankly.

Kit Hoover:

Same cue The Coop. That's why I'm doing this. I'm not kidding.

Gabby Reece:

Well, when I saw that note, I go, oh, I get what's happening here.

Kit Hoover:

You know? Exactly.

Gabby Reece:

I'm ready to go back to work in a bigger way because I also feel like a lot of women, it's so easy for us to feel overlooked, forgotten, whatever the things that we could experience, but to focus on that we have a little bit of experience, maybe something we can contribute, some wisdom, we can help younger people and also just in business, that really interests me. And maybe I also secretly and selfishly think it will keep me from freaking out that I'm getting older. I think also be smart and strategic. What are the anecdotes for some of the things that you might have ahead of you?

Kit Hoover:

So what does that look like for you?

Gabby Reece:

Well, between Laird Superfood and XPT and the podcast and maybe trying to figure out ways to consolidate some of these things a little bit more. I have some stuff I can put my teeth into that I'm interested in for sure.

Kit Hoover:

Okay, wait, I don't waste any more of your time, but fill in this blank. Okay. One word or long answer, whatever it is. What makes you happy?

Gabby Reece:

What makes me happy is when I know that the people that I'm very close to are doing their thing and they feel good. It doesn't have to be next to me just when I know they're off there doing it and feeling good. That gives me a deep sense of fulfillment. And when I know that I have challenges that I am taking on and creatively expressing myself out there. It's pretty simple and a nice family dinner and I'm pretty good.

Kit Hoover:

I so agree. Is there anything better when the family dinner goes? Well, it's not every time, but there's some times where all of a sudden it just clicks and I feel like everybody's firing on all cylinders. I'm not kidding. It's like my Christmas morning when everybody's laughing and they're teasing and they're joking and we're eating dippy, whatever, pasta. And it's just, there's something about that. That's when I think I am at the happiest in my heart.

Gabby Reece:

It's one of the essences of life. I always say that. And when you have little kids, when you hear those little feet walking to and fro on the floor, you think, man, just pay attention to that. Some of the good stuff of life, it's like when people go on walks and you listen. As silly as it sounds like birds, just that I'm not a prescriber, that people have to have families and all of that. I'm not suggesting that it's when you can notice all the little moments that really are so sweet in our lives. It's very easy just to power right through.

Kit Hoover:

Well, you delivered today, so thank you for the home run, Gabby Reece.

Gabby Reece:

Well, Kit, you're a delight. I appreciate your just, I don't mean this in a cliche, but you're really a bright light. I have a friend who's from the south and she's like, I'm crying on the inside and I don't get that sense for you, but I just, you're gangbusters all the time. So thank you.

Kit Hoover:

Well, thank you for saying yes. I love you, mama. Have a great day. Thanks for everything. 

Gabby Reece:

Good Luck and kick ass. Have fun.

Kit Hoover:

Bye. Sweets.

Gabby Reece:

Aloha

–

Kit Hoover:

Coop. There it is. A huge thank you to Gabby Reese who blew me away today with her clarity and thoughtful approach to literally everything. I really loved her quote talking about her husband Laird, saying that quote, I don't talk to any person better than I do till Laird. Let that sit. I really love that, even after all they've been through and anyone who's been in a marriage really a long or short one knows that that is extremely hard to do. I dunno about y'all, but that really sat with me. What a brilliant statement. 

Thank you for joining us, my chickens. If you liked this episode, please give us a 5 star rating, drop in a great review, and tag us @thecoopwithkithoover. See you next time in The Coop.

And remember, as my mom Bug always says, life is not a dress rehearsal. Make it count. 

Today's episode was produced by me, Kit Hoover and Harper McDonald. Our technical producer is Christian Brown, and today's episode was edited by Christian Brown. Business Development by Casey Ladd. 

And a special thank you to all of our sponsors.