Own the Outcome with Tyler Deveraux

Protect Your Peace with Trent Shelton

• Tyler Deveraux

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What happens when your dream becomes your nightmare? For Trent Shelton, reaching the NFL should have been his crowning achievement. Instead, it became the beginning of a painful journey that would ultimately lead to his greatest purpose.

His philosophy of "Protect Your Peace" emerged from a profound encounter during a moment of complete burnout—when a homeless man in a San Francisco alley offered unexpected wisdom about internal versus external wealth.

Trent's approach to life challenges conventional wisdom in refreshing ways. Rather than setting goals, he creates standards to live by. Instead of viewing boundaries as walls, he sees them as bridges that connect him to what truly matters. 

Whether you're facing career disappointment, struggling with identity after a major life change, or simply seeking more peace amid chaos, Trent's journey offers both inspiration and practical wisdom. As he reminds us: "You're not here to be perfect; you're here to be purposeful." Don't miss this powerful episode!

And don't miss your chance to hear Trent LIVE at Peak Partnership 2025! 

➡️ https://peakpartnership.com/ 

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Tyler Deveraux:

All right, aloha and welcome to Own the Outcome podcast. My name is Tyler Devereaux and today, man, we have the one and only Trent Shelton. Trent, welcome to the podcast, brother.

Trent Shelton:

What up Tyler man? Thanks for having me, man. I appreciate you sharing your platform with me today, man.

Tyler Deveraux:

Absolutely, brother, appreciate you being on our platform. Those of you who don't know Trent you're one of a select few who don't he's a beast. We'll talk about his journey, for sure. He'll also be at Peak Partnership. So all of y'all who will be at Peak Partnership this will be a little preview for you, but excited to have you there. So let's just kind of lead into it, man. I I've been excited to have you there, so let's just kind of lead into it, man. I mean you had. Well, let's just lead into your journey. How did you become Trent Shelton? You went through the NFL, had a stint in the NFL and now have transitioned to be one of the most prolific motivational speakers in the space. Let's talk a little bit about that journey. Where did you grow up and how did you even land in the NFL?

Trent Shelton:

Because that's a huge feat, yeah, man. So, um, I always gotta give a shout out to little rock, arkansas, because my family kills me if I don't. But I was, that's where my mom and dad are from, my grandparents. I bless their soul. But, uh, I moved from little rock when I was like not even one, and then I grew up in new orleans, louisiana, until seven, seventh grade.

Trent Shelton:

Then we moved to texas, fort worth, worth, texas, and I've been here ever since and sports has been everything like since I have two older brothers, so like I had no choice, like when I came, you know, when I came into this world, it was like follow them. And they were big in sports, no-transcript, probably should have stuck with baseball, but I enjoy football and Texas and Florida. You know California, you know football is religion, and blessed enough to get a scholarship to Baylor, a D1 scholarship there, and then all Big 12. And then I went to the nfl um, undrafted though, so that was kind of like.

Trent Shelton:

The first shock to my self-worth was like man, I'm not getting drafted. I thought I would get drafted. And then, once I hit the nfl man, it was a nightmare. So it was my dream coming true. But it's like walking into my nightmare because I spent three years there but you know, every other week getting cut, getting released, different cities, and it was pretty tough for me and that's probably the first time in my life where I hit rock bottom and that started my journey of what people know today.

Tyler Deveraux:

So, man, okay, so you say it was your nightmare. Give me an understanding of what you mean by that, because you did. You bounced around in some teams. I think you were on the understanding of of of what you mean by that, cause you did. You bashed her into some teams. I think you were on the Colts Seahawks. I'm a skins fan, or a commander's fan, or every you know. I still call them the skins, but yeah, yeah, man, so like.

Trent Shelton:

so at that time, um, in 2007 with the Colts, I mean I had a great preseason. So I'm like you know, I don't understand the business part of it. I don't understand. Like it's a numbers game. I just think if you're better or you're good, then you're gonna get on the team. And it didn't happen like that and I'll give you a good example.

Trent Shelton:

So in Indy and this happened multiple times throughout my career so I make the team and so I go ahead and get my apartment always told myself I would get a car, you know, just just to award myself nothing, nothing crazy. We got a car, get settled in and then, literally before even the first game like this was like preparing for the first week I get a call. We call them Terrible Tuesday because that's when they make the cuts. So I get a call on Terrible Tuesday and I didn't know what it was. They're like hey, come in here and bring your playbook. I'm just like all right, maybe they'll give me some more plays cool, so naive at that time. And so I go in there with my playbook and they sit me down to give you the same spiel you probably see in the hard knocks, like we love you, you're great, and but we got to make another choice.

Trent Shelton:

It's a numbers game and literally like I just got all these things and now I'm driving back from India to Texas, embarrassed man, because like everybody knows me and so like I didn't go out, I stayed at my parents' house, I didn't leave there, and then two weeks later they bring me back and so that was my journey. Like I got in times when I was with the Seahawks where I got cut walking off the practice field. I'm like you could have did it before practice. So that was just kind of the mindset I was in. It was almost a fear of mine that like, no matter how great I did, it was still a chance of me getting cut.

Tyler Deveraux:

And so that's just the nature of the NFL that I had to learn the hard way, bro, that is a brutal journey. So is that where you know your book Protect the Peace? Is that where that comes from? Is that where that title comes from, or where does that title come from? Tell me more about that.

Trent Shelton:

So Protect your Peace. That came a little bit later on, as I got into this journey of self-development. And you know, just, people always ask how'd you become a speaker? Like, was that like your business? Like, no, like I'm a. If you ask people who probably know me, they're probably, like Trent is pretty introverted, you know, and that's the truth. And so how I got into this space was when I hit my rock bottom in 2010,. My best friend committed suicide. So he was my teammate at Baylor. He had some hard times after that NFL stuff, some self-worth stuff he committed suicide. So it was my promise to him that I would live the rest of my life doing what I do, and so that's when it got real for me. That's when I picked up my cell phone back in the day on Facebook, going live, and it started to grow this brand that people now know as Rehab Time or Trent Shelton.

Trent Shelton:

Where Protect your Peace came into play was 2016. This is, like you know, we're growing probably faster than I want to grow. I mean, obviously I love it, but it's just I can't handle it. Like I mean it's overnight success, quote, unquote. And I had a 32 city tour and in this tour, you know it was great, but I was burnt out. I mean, I'm going from three cities a weekend on stage for 90 minutes to two hours. You know meeting people, all that stuff, you throw events, you know exactly what it is and I'm like, I'm exhausted. But instead of slowing down, instead of saying hey, I need some support here, I was literally smiling for the camera. But down behind the scenes and to shorten this up in San Francisco was my breaking point and I was crying backstage. My team didn't know it and mustered up the strength to go inspire. Everybody got off stage. I told my team, hey, go handle everything in front of the house. And I went back into this alley and it seems like a story from a movie. But to fast forward this, as I was out there pretty much bawling my eyes out, thinking like man, this purpose feels like a burden, like I don't know if I want to do this anymore A man walks down this alley and he's a homeless man and he looks at me and he says, hey, you're the guy everybody's here to see, because on the marquee you can see my face and I'm like yeah.

Trent Shelton:

And he says it must suck to be you. And I look at him like did he just say that? And so I was like, whatever, I don't want to deal with this. So I reached in my pocket. I had some money. I was going to give it to him me. I feel sorry for you. He says it may look like externally I have nothing, but internally I have everything because I have peace. He says you. It looks like you're the opposite. It looks like you have everything, but internally I can tell you don't have peace. And so from that moment on, those words protect your peace start to be the foundation of my life. And so it's just kind of a barrier for me to always have this place internally that I can be successful and not chase so many external things where I end up burning out.

Tyler Deveraux:

So good, bro, that is so good and you know it's interesting because we do a lot of events. We definitely do a lot of events and I do a lot of speaking and it is a burden. You know, like your purpose is a burden. You said I feel like this purpose is a burden and sometimes that purpose can be a burden. You know, if you don't have the right perspective or you don't, you know you're not on lock on the. You know the internal side of things and knowing why you're doing it and you know it's your perspective and that's what I love that you talk about.

Tyler Deveraux:

Man, I've never heard you. I've actually I can't believe I've never heard that side of it before. I have all the stuff that I've listened to, I've listened to so much. I've literally I don't know, or maybe I've heard it and I didn't, it didn't sit with me or I didn't remember it, but I I've never heard that side of it, brother. That's pretty deep, that is pretty deep. So where did you take it from there? What did you do? I know you give nine principles in the book to protect your peace, and how did you do that? Or where did you take it from there, right to start on that journey?

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, well, I had to take ownership. You know my brand. I have five words I've been saying since 2009,. It all starts with you and I'm a massive ownership type of guy. You know, I feel like we live in a world where it's I call it the BC mindset, where it's blame and complain and, you know, sometimes it's true, sometimes it is that person's fault or people's fault, but what that does, it robs you of the gift of responsibility. You know, responsibility, lets me know, I can point the thumb at myself and say I can do something about it. So I had to do that, man, and I had to make some hard choices and decisions. Part of those burdens was like having to fire people that I didn't want to fire because they were close to me, but I had to make certain choices for the company's best interest and also for my best interest.

Trent Shelton:

And I started to do those things, started to make decisions, and I came up with three pretty much foundational principles of Protect your Peace. So it's protect your mind, it's protect your energy, excuse me protect your mind and protect your soul. And within those, you know we have uh, we break that down to three different areas in each one, but my main one that I told people that really helped change my life was setting boundaries. And we hear that word boundary, people think it's like, you know, it's a wall, like, oh, you're keeping things out your life, and it's really never that, unless it has to be. I like to think of boundaries as bridges and I always ask myself, if a boundary is a bridge, okay, what do I need in my life or wasn't helping me mentally? And then, externally, I had to start making boundaries and, you know, moving things around and spending less time in environments and with people, and that was very hard. But once I started setting those boundaries, I started to receive just more clarity, more peace in my life and it gave me the freedom of even creativity.

Trent Shelton:

Because, tyler, for so long, you know, I was being pulled so much. Right, I was a slave to requests, so much, and that comes with it. At times when you're a CEO, you're the leader. But I had to be like man. You know I need to have some time for myself. So I have this in the book. I talk about it. It's a running joke Because people, even to this day that read the book and know me like I can't believe I got ahold of you before 12 PM.

Trent Shelton:

So it's the thing I call the 12 PM theory. And so before 12 PM it's very, very hard to reach me and I always tell people I'm available to three things emergencies, my family and my purpose. And if it's not that unless it's just some you know thing, I have to do, that time is for me. And the thing that I tell people it's not because I want to not be you know thing, I have to do, that time is for me. And the thing that I tell people it's not because I want to not be you know, I want to be standoffish or I don't want to talk to people.

Trent Shelton:

It's just that I realized that the opposite me being so available in the morning, me being so available before that I would get to the things that matter in my life and be burnt out. So you might say what are the things that matter, trent? Well, my kids, you know, when they come home at 3 pm, I realized from school like I barely had any energy because when I got to 12, I was already burnt out. So I said I got to change these things. So now how I operate with this boundary is when I arrive at 12 pm, where most people are like burnt out, because I think the statistic is 77% of people in the world are burnt out by 12 p. They get dad at a better state, they get dad with a better energy, wife gets husband in a better place, and so it worked for me. So it might not work for everybody, but I think everybody needs some version of that, whether it's 8 pm, 7 pm I mean 7 am, excuse me, or 7 whatever Some version of protecting your energy, protecting your mind and protecting your soul, so you can show up as a better person to this world.

Tyler Deveraux:

Yes, brother, it's so good. You know it's interesting living out here in Maui because my office is in Orlando. So that's like a six or a five hour difference, depending on, you know, daylight savings time, and so I wake up early. I have, you know, my morning routines, and when I first moved out here, you know, I mean it's already, you know, 6 am, it's already noon on the East Coast, and so people are hitting me up, hitting me up, and in the beginning I would just allow it to happen. You know I would start my day with bombarded with messages and it was not working, and so I literally had to set the boundary.

Tyler Deveraux:

And the boundary now is not until I get in the office, which is I get in the office a little earlier, but 9 am, mine's 9 am, and that all up until 9 am. You're not going to hear from me. There's no, I'm not answering my phone, I'm not answering my messages, I'm not indulging that. You know what that time is. That's time for my family, you know, getting my kids ready for school and getting them to school and taking them to school and pouring into them, and it's time to come over that bridge. So one of the things that I would love to hear your perspective on is how do you know, how do you identify when somebody is when you need to start? I don't know, maybe, maybe they shouldn't be crossing that bridge. How do you know that they're not the right person? They could be a great person, but maybe not great at what you're doing. How do you identify that?

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, I think that's the hard part, right, because I think it's easy to set a boundary with someone, maybe, who disrespects it all the time. That's the only time it becomes a wall in my life when it's a person that continuously disrespects it. But the hard part is exactly what you asked Like you have good people in your life but they're not great for your purpose, right? You have good people in your life. They're not great for your mission or where you're going, and so I always tell people this in my life Like I don't believe in setting silent boundaries. I think that's a little bit emotionally immature. I believe in having communication, no-transcript giving, giving, and it's always just take, take, take. Then I'm probably going to change the level of just the access that's a better word that you have in my life Doesn't mean that I don't talk to you, it doesn't mean that I cut you off, it's just access. And so there are seasons where you know that has to change. You might have somebody who's always around you, but as you grow, as you get better, as you, you know, grow whatever it is in your life, they might not be on the same wavelength as you. And so having that conversation sometimes people don't like it.

Trent Shelton:

I did it with my boys, like when I got into this life of personal development, like I lived a lifestyle of you know, most 20 year olds, you know what I mean Going out doing all the things. And I told my boys like, hey man, I got a son. Tristan at that time was just born. I said I got a son now and I got a different mission. The stuff we used to do. I'm not doing it because, number one, I was tired of paying for everything. I'm not doing that no more. This is where I'm going. Some friends got it. Some friends was like okay, bro, salute. Some friends didn't like it but I gave that clear communication so they knew what the expectation was and so, however they felt after that, that was their business. You know I had to move forward with my life and so I think communication is the first step to that and then, based upon how they receive it or not, you know, uh, should tell you your next move.

Tyler Deveraux:

Yeah, that's so good. Earl immediately wrote it down silent boundaries, because I agree that. Third, communication is huge, bro. It's like letting them know what you're doing and why you're doing it, and that was a big pivot moment for you. I know I've heard you say that a lot of times.

Tyler Deveraux:

Tristan, when Tristan came into the world, that was a big, pivot moment for you and kind of where you really started to look at your life and make changes. I'm going to ask you about that, and I can relate to that, by the way, because the only thing I ever knew I wanted to be was a dad, like I knew, but I knew the type of dad I wanted to be, you know, and I felt like my life was. So. When Britt told me my wife Britt, when she told me that we were pregnant, I was like so pumped. But in that same moment I was like, oh shit, I got to take a look at my life and clean some things up. So why was that such a big pivotal moment for you when you found out Tristan was coming to the world, and what things did you need to do to change?

Trent Shelton:

Well, it was big for me because I was blessed to have an example of a great father, my. It was big for me because I was blessed to have an example of a great father. My dad's still alive today. And my dad I mean not just saying this like I mean everybody loves him. I mean people that are my friends, people that work with him. He's just that type of guy, and so I've always had his support. You know, whatever game I had since I was little, I don't remember a time where my dad wasn't there, you know. So it was expectation set, and so I was like man.

Trent Shelton:

You know, at that time, me and Maria, we weren't together, just to be honest with you, I was still playing football and figuring it out, but I made a decision to be a present father, you know, no matter what, no matter the circumstances, and so I'm going to say this publicly and it might get a little backflap, whatever, get a little backflap whatever. But I just don't ever understand how people and I do, let me say I don't understand, but for me I just don't respect. You know, when you have brought somebody into this world, that you're not doing everything you can to fight for that individual, and so that was my mindset with Tristan. And now he's 16 and, uh, you know we're a family now for sure, but that was just my mindset going into that. I wanted to be a better man for him because I knew he would follow my footsteps.

Tyler Deveraux:

That's so good. I agree, bro. I agree I have a great dad who, man, I've always known that he loved me, you know. But my dad definitely made some mistakes, bro. Like you know, my mom's a single mom. My dad moved out of the country and that's why I knew the type of dad I wanted to be. You know, you can get those examples both ways and I pull so much good from my dad. My dad is still alive as well. It's such dude, he is an amazing. So, dad, if you're listening to this, you made some mistakes, but I love you and he's a great dude, you know. But it's like, man, I gotta be there. I gotta be there.

Tyler Deveraux:

Like that was the big thing for me. I needed some balance to be able to do that and I think that you know, along the journey, along the way, sometimes we lose our way. You know, sometimes we lose our way, sometimes we just kind of and this had to have happened Like when you where? Where was this transition from transition from the NFL to you NFL to becoming a public speaker? At what time was that in comparison to becoming a dad?

Trent Shelton:

That was pretty much in sync. Tristan was born in 2008. I started rehab time, made the decision to start in 2009. And so Tristan, he takes credit for it. Today he's like it wasn't for me, Like this wouldn't be a thing, and he's pretty much right, because he was my moment that said you know what I want to? I want to build something greater. And also, too, I didn't want to get stuck in my sad story and I'll talk about this even with individuals how sometimes we're so stuck in our sad stories. I didn't want to be the guy that was like talking about how the NFL did me wrong for the rest of my life. I didn't want that to be the story that my son, you know, experienced for me. So I said, man, I have to do something different. And that's when I went on this journey of, you know, rehab time and creating my best life. But he was definitely the inspiration, the motivation behind it.

Tyler Deveraux:

Sweet Okay, so Sweet Okay. So you know the name of the podcast Own the Outcome podcast. And so, first, what is Own the Outcome? When you hear that, like, what does Own the Outcome mean to you? And then the second, the follow-up to that, will be how did you own that outcome? Because I can't even imagine bro transitioning from this career in the NFL and you felt like you're going to be doing that for, I'm sure, a long time. And then there has to be this identity shift and change that's happening. So, first, what does own the outcome mean? And then, secondly, how did you own the outcome of that challenge? Because it's a big challenge.

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, own the outcome means to me that it's on you. It kind of reminds me of those five words it all starts with you. End of the day, you want the responsibility as an athlete. I want the, I want the ball. Like, put it on me, right, it's pressure time. I want it. You know, good or bad, failure or success. I want the opportunity to fail or the opportunity to succeed. I want that and uh, that's what it means for me maximum ownership over the situation. And um, what's the second part of that question?

Tyler Deveraux:

and then I love that. I love that comparison, bro. First off, then I'll ask the second part of the question. But I love that comparison of like give me the ball like it's, let's go. You know, give me the ball. I love that. The second part was how did you own the outcome? That's exactly what it is. First off to backtrack, like when I heard you talk about ownership earlier, versus placing the blame, like for me.

Tyler Deveraux:

It's like you can't control the outcome, but you can own any outcome. You do that by taking ownership for do you? What do you control? Right, you either become the creator or the victim. Dude, I want to be the creator. You know I can responsibility. It's like it's my job to respond. It's my job to make it better. Let's go, you know so, with the NFL side in the transition. It was how did you own the outcome of that challenge? Because that had to have been a challenge, mentally, all of it. How did you own the outcome of that?

Trent Shelton:

yeah, I, um, I took an audit of my life and I still remember it to this day. You know, sitting in my room at my parents house and I asked myself this question at that moment like is my life over? Because I thought it was Like, who am I without sports? I don't even. I never even worked a nine to five in my life, so I don't know what to do. I went to Baylor with speech communications. It's funny how that worked out, but that was just to do it.

Trent Shelton:

So I can, you know, have a simpler, more stress-free path in making it to the league. So I remember asking my question to myself is this it? And something in my soul said man, no, this is the beginning. And so the beginning for me was me rehabbing my own life. So I didn't start this to be a speaker, I didn't start this for anybody else. I started it for me mind, body and soul. So I said these are the things I can control. I can't control things in the future. I can't control. I can influence it, but I don't know what tomorrow is going to bring. I can't control, you know things five years from now. But what can I do now? Like what's in my ownership right now that I can take control of.

Trent Shelton:

So I started personal development. I started reading books. It's funny I'm now author of books, but I wasn't reading books at that time. I didn't want to read. Started doing that, I got myself around different environments. I got myself around people I can learn from. I found mentors, I found coaches and then also, too, I just took my spirituality and also my health to another level, and so mind, body and soul, I control that, and what's crazy is that you know people. When you say that people are like, oh well, how did that create anything? I believe when you show your life that you're ready for your next level, it presents itself. Always, tell people, the journey is always loyal to presenting what you need. Once you take the step, and once I took that step, another opportunity came, another connection came, and it started this journey of my life that I'm on now.

Tyler Deveraux:

That's good, you can see me like taking notes. You know you took an audit of your life, because I believe the success, success leaves clues, dude. And took an audit of your life, you realized, you know, that's not the end, it's the beginning, with what a beautiful realization to come to, like that's beautiful. And then, what can I control? It's one of my favorite questions Like what can I control right now? Right, what can I control right now? And then is your mind, body, soul. You know, that's what you, that's what you honed in on, and so I just believe there's a framework to success. That's a beautiful framework of looking internally and then going one step at a time. Because you know, you know who Inky Johnson is. I don't know if you've met Inc before, but I'm sure you know who he is.

Trent Shelton:

I love Inc. He just spoke at my event.

Tyler Deveraux:

Oh cool Bro. I love this dude, like he's spoken at Peak as well, and I got to know Inc pretty good. And you know Inky and you know Inc is similar. You know, like his journey, he's pretty introverted, but he had this journey where all of a sudden he's coming out on stage. He wasn't planning on being a speaker, you weren't planning on being a speaker, but it was a way for you to own your outcome. You know and it's amazing the sense of responsibility that comes when it's your job to share a message of hope to people. And so when you my question is, if you were, if you somebody's out there that they feel like they've lost some hope, you know they don't see this vision for a bigger future, a better future what would you tell that person?

Trent Shelton:

I would tell them what I told myself, and I know these words might seem hard to believe right now. But first I would say you know, congratulations. You know, um, because sometimes you have to lose certain things to gain better things. Right, sometimes you have to lose your way to find a better way, and I realized that with my life. You know, just because certain chapters weren't great, it doesn't mean your story can't be great. So I would tell you to focus on what you can control. Focus on the 1% in your life that might be going right. You might have 99% of the things that are going wrong, but it might be that 1% that can change your life. At least I know that's true for me, 99% of my life didn't go right, but 1% did, and that 1% changed 100% of my life. So your change is coming, your breakthrough is coming. Just take the step and let the journey reveal your next one.

Tyler Deveraux:

Yeah, and that's. You know, one of the things that I love that you talk about is you talk about trusting your journey, you know, instead of getting stuck in comparison, cause I think that comparison is the thief of all joy. You know, we can always compare ourselves to people like dude, compare myself to you. If I'm comparing myself to you, I'm like well, his background's better, his hair is definitely better, his shoulders are broader, skin tones better, what the hell is like, dude? That's the thief of all joy, you know. It's like how do we just trust the journey? So do you have a process? Cause one of the things that I love to hear you talk about is trusting your journey versus getting stuck in comparison. So maybe where are some times that you've compared? And then when did you start to lean into just trusting your journey? And is that all of a sudden, something that just happens, or is that a continual process that you have to check into?

Trent Shelton:

Um, it's a continual process, uh, especially with social media, where that we're in, uh, subconscious level, we're comparing. I mean, you pick up your phone, you're scrolling, you're comparing, you know it's just even subconsciously. That's why it's very important to work on a subconscious level right, to make sure you are, you know, doing the internal work, to make sure you are making. You know, making sure that you're you know taking care of your habits and doing the things that that make you feel better, whether it's meditation, whether it's, you know, going for in nature, whether it's doing audits in your life. That's why it's important, because social media you're going to compare, and I've had that where I pick up my phone and like, oh man, I'm not doing this or I'm not doing that, and every time that I started to run a race that I wasn't meant to run, I burnt out. Every single time it reminds me of track right. Every single time it reminds me of track right. When you try to keep up with somebody else's pace, you will burn out. Your pace is your pace, and so when you enroll in your race of life and your race of business and your race of whatever it is you're going to do a content creator, even an athlete, you can't put your finish line. You can't let somebody else's finish line influence yours.

Trent Shelton:

So I was telling my son this recently like you know, he's a, he's a big time player in Texas. I mean just got his first offer as a freshman. But there's other guys out there that have nine, 10 offers so he can look at them and be like man, like what am I doing wrong? And I said, man, this is your journey, right? No-transcript. Now, I don't believe in really destinations, because the destination always moves. I don't have destination addiction, like I got to be here, I got to do this, it's more so. What can I control in this moment and enjoy this journey? And that's allowed me to focus on my race instead of worrying about somebody else's.

Tyler Deveraux:

I like that man. So how do you do that? Because I would say that I find myself, you know, addicted to some outcomes. Yeah, you know, because I'm big on you know. What do you want and what is this life like. I'm creating this vision and this purpose, but I agree with what you just said it does change, it just does change, it does improve, it gets bigger. So how do you, when you look at creating a compelling future, you know, and then staying focused on where you're at right now, what's that process look like for you? I know it's a broad question, it's a very broad question, but yeah.

Trent Shelton:

So I want to say this too with with outcomes right. It's like um always say it's the meaning you give to the outcomes that often matter, right, and that can either trigger like some anxiety or trigger just even peace. It's always the meanings you give things right. We're not in control of a lot of things. Of course we can influence it, but we can do everything right, and you know this, do everything right and then it still doesn't go right. And what I've learned is I have to trust, right. I have to trust that what's for me, it's for me. And that doesn't mean that we don't work, it doesn't mean that we're lazy, we just sit back and just think we can attract everything, but it means that, okay, if this didn't work out, I trust that something else is going to work out, and that's really helped my life and it's really helped my journey and it's really helped me stay focused on the mission at hand, because people ask this, tyler, all the time I'm sure you get this too.

Trent Shelton:

It's like you know, uh, where do you want to be 10 years from now? And I used to like try to come up with like some type of vision that I had. And, of course, I want to be alive, I want to be healthy. There's things that for sure I have, like forecasting for sure. But it's like if you would ask me 10 years ago would I no, like no way that I could have planned this. And so I realized like I don't want to live 10 years from now, like I want to live in this 10 days, 10 months. Maybe you know what I mean and I want to enjoy the process.

Trent Shelton:

So, to answer your question, this is something that I that I say, that I get a little bit of backflap and personal development, but I always say I don't believe in goals. People look at me crazy and I want to break this down. Do I believe in goal setting? Yes, right, foundationally, yes, but what I realized in life, tyler, that goals are something that you reach, standards are something that you live by. So I tell people I don't really set goals necessarily, like, of course we have marks that we want to hit, cool.

Trent Shelton:

But I break down the goal and I say, okay, who do I have to be in order to achieve this consistently Right? What's the standard of this goal? What's the lifestyle? And so I'm in the lifestyles, not in the movements. I'm in the lifestyles. I'm in the standards and so I want to live by this. And what I've realized? That when I just live the standard, when I just live, you know the lifestyle of it. When I break it down and say I'm going to be this person, cause this is what the goal demands me to become, I blow those goals out the water every single time and I realized, like man, I set a goal anyway that was limited and so that's really helped my life be able to stay consistent with elevating and achieving and doing more than I thought I could do.

Tyler Deveraux:

That's good, dude, that's good, the standard. You know, we actually just did a meeting right before this with my company and I talk about, you know, we have our values and our, but we have, I have standards, we create standards, we create standards, and I love that because it is, it's, it's. You know, I believe that every outcome is the necessary outcome. You know, I'm, I'm, I'm very spiritual and I have, I just have.

Tyler Deveraux:

My biggest strength, I believe, is, is I have faith. I have faith that in a higher power, god, and that I believe God's. My father, and I believe, you know, as a father, becoming a dad has completely changed my relationship with God, because I'm pretty hard on myself, I'm an achiever, like I'm hard on myself, but I look at my kids you know, paxton Marley, my little kids and it's like I want everything for them. Like when they make a mistake, it's like I'm not. You know what I'm the most proud. When they make a mistake and then they learn from it, it's like, oh my gosh, I'm not angry, it's like I'm the most proud. You know, it's like, just believe God wants everything for me and it's my job to just recognize and improve along the way.

Tyler Deveraux:

But I also believe that every outcome is the necessary outcome and that belief in and of itself helps me enjoy the journey to whatever destination. Belief in and of itself helps me enjoy the journey to whatever destination you know I'm headed towards. So I think it's big, a big deal. So my question would be along those lines is what are those standards? Or maybe even look at standards you can share them or your routines like, because I know that I have routines that I default back to, like. If I'm doing these things, if my life gets out of order, it's usually because of something that I stopped doing. So are there these things that keep you rooted, or or standards or values, or whatever you know you would like to talk about there, that keep you grounded and rooted on the you know, the journey that you're on?

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, so for me, um, I live and talk about this to protect your peace, called, uh, you know, live in fulfillment, um, I like to call it the art of fulfillment, and so fulfillment to me is success. Um, you know the things that fulfill me. It isn't necessarily like social media numbers or anything like that, like that's cool stuff for sure, but it's just fulfillment, and so I'm always going to have my non-negotiables wrapped around that, and so I'm a man of faith too. So, prayer life, I'm meditating. I love nature. I know you're out in Hawaii, so I'm sure you love nature too. So I love nature. I love hiking that's my go-to.

Trent Shelton:

I'm a nature head, so I'm always out there in the trails, and that's a non-negotiable. And then I'm always honoring my creativity. So, so, every single day, I'm in here creating something. You know what I mean, whether it be something that I've used for the world, something that's just for me, but I'm always honoring my creativity. And then I'm always putting myself in positions to grow. I'm always putting myself in positions that are a little bit uncomfortable, right? So, whether it be me trying something athletically that I've never done before running a 10K or half marathon whether it be, you know, getting myself in an environment because I deal with a little bit of social anxiety People, you know I talk about that too getting myself in an environment that challenges that, so I can grow and I can become better, and so my non-negotiables are wrapped around that and doing the things that basically, at the end of my life I can say, man, you know, I live the fulfilled life because that's what I'm after.

Tyler Deveraux:

I think that that exercise would be so powerful for people to really just take a look of what truly makes you fulfilled. Yeah, what brings the fulfillment? Because it's never a social media number or it's not. It, dude, you know, I would imagine you feel fulfilled when you're on stage. I know I feel fulfilled on stage and it's because I'm living my purpose, but I also feel very fulfilled when I'm, you know, spending time with my kids or telling them a story, or reading them a book, or I mean it's like that kind of stuff. You know, just taking an audit of your life, of what makes you feel fulfilled, I think is super, super powerful. So you mentioned social anxiety. I'm curious about it because, dude, you're on stage, you're like this, bigger than life. You know persona on stage. Sometimes I have to imagine people hear that and be like no way, this dude has social anxiety. What brings you the social anxiety? Like what is it and how do you? How do you fight it or grow?

Trent Shelton:

yeah, I've had it my whole life um, I had it my whole life, since I can remember, and what's funny is that always there's two types of people. There's people who know me like post, you know, I would say like the transformation, like our post 2009, when, if you experience me just on social media, on stage, you're like no way, like Trent has social anxiety. But then you go ask my dad, like, or people who know me my wife they'll tell you like no way Trent's on stage. My dad, to this day, he tells people like if I was a betting man, trent would be the last pick to be a public figure, a thousand percent. So, growing up, you know social anxiety. You know it's deep and it's not about being shy or anything like that. But you know, sometimes it's not feeling like you belong, like there's times in my life where I'll get in a crowded room and still feel alone, like nothing's wrong, it's just it's part of me.

Trent Shelton:

So what I had to do is work through it like anything else. I had to face it. What you don't face you will never fix. You can never win your war by running from your battle. So I decided to run towards it and it's scary Every stage I get on. Even at your event. You're probably going to see me backstage somewhere with some headphones on, not that I'm trying to be antisocial, but I'm trying to get into this place of mission and when I realized two things. Number one fear. Fear will never be strong enough when the mission is great enough. And I illustrate this by simply saying if there is a freaking tiger outside right now and I promise you, I'm not the, I love animals but I stop at dogs pretty much I'm not going to go pet a tiger. But if my daughter, you know, marley or I think we have the same kids names of marley and maya they're outside with a tiger little girl's name is marley.

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, it is yep, and I heard that yep, bro, yep, that's my young, amazing. And if they're out there, oh, you're fine, I'm gonna go fight the tiger. Is the fear still there? Yes, but the mission is strong. So it's the same thing when it comes to this purpose. Like, the mission is so strong for me because of what I promised my friend that killed himself, that I will go through any fear every single time. Of course, I have my strategies of like meditation and getting out of my head and into my heart, but the mission is so strong for rehab time and what I'm doing that I bring this side out of me, because I do have a athlete side that's like fearless for sure, but I have to work to bring that person out.

Tyler Deveraux:

Yeah, that's good man. What is that promise that you made? What promise did you make to your buddy that took his life? And why did you? Why did you make that promise Like what about you? Why did you make that promise Like what? What about you made you determined to make that promise?

Trent Shelton:

Yeah, um, the promise that I made to him was I will live the rest of my life, uh, helping people know their self-worth. I will live the rest of my life helping people know, no matter what they lose, they don't have to lose themselves. No matter what ended, their life doesn't have to end, and so that's why you see a lot of my content around mental health. Because he took his life, because he thought his life was over. He lost a relationship, he lost sports and he felt like life wasn't worth living. And I felt guilty because I'm like man. I didn't know he was going through this.

Trent Shelton:

This is, like I said my college roommate, one of my best friends. I didn't know he was going through these things, and so when I got that call and they told me you know how they found him it was like man. The best way I can keep him alive is doing this, and he's more alive in my life than he's ever been Like. I credit him for being able to impact so many people, because he gave me a sense of purpose and a sense of meaning and, um, yeah, man, it's always still hard to talk about, but that's the promise that I made to him. So every time it gets hard, tyler. Every time that you know this journey of doing this for 15 years, it gets tiring and I just think about looking over his casket and saying, hey, bro, I'm gonna go do this and we're going to help rehab the world.

Tyler Deveraux:

Thanks for sharing that man that's super powerful. Um, the self-worth side is such an interesting journey, bro, because you know you'll meet people that have ultimate success, like tons of success, and everybody on the outside would think that they see it in themselves, but they don't see it in themselves. So how do you help somebody see their worth, their self-worth? And, as you're thinking about that, I'm sure you already have an answer, but my tagline for my investment company we resonate on this, we're very connected here. My tagline for my investment company we resonate on this, we're very connected here. My tagline for my investment company is invest with Aloha.

Tyler Deveraux:

It's because Aloha, aloha doesn't just mean hello, goodbye, if you break down this word. Alo means to see, and ha is breath of life. So when I say Aloha, I mean I see the God in you and I know it's reciprocal that you see the God in me and then ha is breath of life, like when I see you not living up to the God in you, I'm going to breathe life into you. So how does Trent Shelton, how do you breathe life into people and how do you teach them to breathe life into themselves?

Trent Shelton:

and see their greatness in themselves. Yeah, if I could give myself any title, it would be a self-worth coach, and that's what I do call myself. I mean, that's the thing that I love. I love to talk on and teach on.

Trent Shelton:

And the thing about self-worth that I have people understand is this Self-worth is not something that you earn from the world, right? Something that's already been given to you. As a man of faith, I believe God gave you worth at birth and that worth is permanent. But what happens is, as human beings right, we attach our worth to things that we can't control. We attach our worth to how people feel about us, and then they control how they feel about us. We attach our worth to metrics, that controls, and I like to explain this as almost like a puppet master, right, pulling the strings on how you feel. Right, and if you talk to people, most people's depression, anxiety, all these things it doesn't come from within, right, it's not an intrinsic thing. It's something that externally, it's connected to.

Trent Shelton:

And so my goal and job and standard and just what I teach people and try to help people understand is that your intrinsic value is what matters. It's called self-worth. It's not called other people's worth. It's not called how they feel about your worth, it's not called world worth, it's called self-worth. And the more you can attach the meanings that the world tries to put on you society standards and the more you can get back to a true foundational truth about your life. It doesn't mean that the storm is not going to come into your life, because the storm is going to find you. I don't care what zip code you live in. Storms are coming. But it means that you know what. No matter what's going on around me, I can still have peace and calm inside me because I know who I am, and so that's my foundational truth.

Trent Shelton:

And there's two pillars of self-worth and I'll end with this is the acceptance of self and the confidence of self. So when you can fully accept who you are flaws, mistakes, all the stuff and not let that dictate how you feel about yourself, you're good. And then the confidence of self is saying you know what. This is who I am. I'm going to be boldly, courageously me, whether I'm their cup of tea or I'm not their cup of tea. I always tell people if I'm not your cup of tea, go get some coffee. I'm okay with that. I'm not trying to be liked by everybody. I'm trying to do the mission that God has put in my heart and I try to teach people that and have people dive into inner more than external things.

Tyler Deveraux:

That's probably one of the most favorite things that I've ever heard on my podcast, bro. Thank you, bro. It is um, thank you, bro, it is, it very much is. I don't just say that because I battle with that, bro and a key takeaway for me with what you just said is the number one. You already have it. And then number two was that last part like to just no matter what, like accept your, the self-acceptance right, accept yourself for the flaws and everything.

Tyler Deveraux:

And I find, find myself, you know, I'm very people don't believe this about me either but I'm very introverted, like when I go to an event that's not my event, I'm super introverted and so and but here's, I just had this discovery, but I don't even know if I've ever shared this with anybody. Where. Why was that the case? Is because that that the question that was going on in my head is like what are they thinking of me? And you had mentioned that you had been in these rooms and, you know, felt like you don't belong or whatever, and that's exactly it. It's like what are they thinking of me? I don't think about that when I go on stage. I'm not thinking about that at all. I'm just never like what are they thinking of me? It's like how can I serve? It's like, how can I serve, how can I be of value, how can I be of? And so this, this, in fact, the question that I always write down, is how can I be a blessing to everybody that I come in contact with? You know, like that's what I like, we'll write down, like that's the focus, you know.

Tyler Deveraux:

And so this better question that I've started to ask is how can I share even more of the love and joy inside me? Anytime I start feeling this insecurity, anytime I start feeling this, like you know anxiety, you know it's like, okay, how can I share even more of the love and joy that's inside, which which means, by the way, that I have love and joy inside me, and I do, and it's my job to share it, no matter what situation, no matter where I'm at, you know. And so I love that, bro. I'm so excited for people to hear that. I'm so excited for people to hear you at peak too, bro, like damn, this is just a taste, but so excited for people to hear you. Your message is powerful, brother, so thank you for owning it, thank you for owning that, thank you. You know your journey. Yeah for sure. Any last bit of advice is going to want to be respectful of your time, but any last bit of advice or anything that you would want to give to somebody who's wrapped this thing up.

Trent Shelton:

I think just to end on that man. I mean, like you said, I think sometimes we put a unfair expectation on ourselves to be perfect, especially in the social media world, where you know people can pick you apart. You know you do one thing and what I realized is that you know a lot of love is conditional, right, a lot of love is conditional in this world. A lot of support is conditional. So like when I'm being my best, it's a part of it. Like if I'm not giving you what you want from me, then you're probably go somewhere else, and that's life. But don't allow conditional love right To to, to make you no longer have unconditional love for yourself. And so if you have flaws, great, I tell people. If you're looking for an imperfect person, start with me. You know what I mean. I'm okay with that. It doesn't mean I make mistakes on purpose, but you're not here to be perfect, you're here to be purposeful. Life isn't about perfection, it's about progression, so keep progressing your life towards the greatest.

Tyler Deveraux:

You Love it, bro. That's a great way to end, great way to end which is right, in line with a quote that I wrote down. Your quote is don't stay stuck on people that have hurt you, you know. Move on and let your future give you the better you deserve. And that is exactly it. Somebody doesn't follow you on social, somebody doesn't like what you're saying. It's like be you, you know. Go there. That's what it is, just uniquely you, brother, appreciate you so much. Man, thank you for being on here, thank you for being you and owning your journey and for sharing your journey. Brother, I appreciate it a ton. We all do, and all y'all out there. First off, if you don't already go, follow, if you don't already follow Trent, follow Trent, grab his book. Protected Peace is such a great book, such a great book, and then we'll see you at Peak Partnership. If you don't have your tickets, grab your tickets and live always with Aloha Peace.