Sober Curious? How Cutting Out Alcohol Transformed Kirsty’s Life & Business

Could alcohol be quietly holding you back in life or business?

In this powerful and honest season finale, I chat with the incredible Kirsty from Sky Rose Coaching, who is also the founder of Sober Buzz CIC, a not-for-profit community supporting sober and sober curious people across the UK.

Kirsty shares her real and deeply personal story of hitting rock bottom with alcohol at 41, the moment she knew things had to change, and what life looks like now after over seven years sober.

This conversation covers serious topics with warmth, humour, and lots of practical takeaways for small business owners who feel like something is off with their drinking but can’t quite put their finger on it.

We talk about:

• Kirsty's journey from high-stress corporate job and heavy drinking to life as a sober coach and founder
• How alcohol can sneakily affect your energy, sleep, decision making, and confidence
• The toxic rise of “mummy needs a wine” culture and how to break free from it
• What to say in social situations when you’re not drinking (without awkwardness)
• How to cope with stress or overwhelm without pouring a drink
• Tips for business owners who want to be more present, more productive, and feel proud of how they show up

You’ll also hear:

• Why Kirsty believes taking a break from alcohol (even for a weekend) can be life changing
• How she built a thriving business and support network around her sobriety
• The small changes you can try today if you're sober curious

This is not a lecture. It’s a warm and practical chat about what’s possible when you step away from something that’s not serving you.

🔗 Links and Resources

• Follow Kirsty on Instagram: @skyrosecoaching_
• Get the 28-Day Sober Curious Workbook: Message Kirsty on Instagram

• Connect with Amanda on Instagram: @amandahughes.uk
• Growth Addicts Show Notes: Read the blog + grab freebies + guest links
• Be Mentored by Amanda: Join Get Seen Get Sales and get the support, strategies & accountability you need to grow your business on social media with confidence. Learn more
• Free Small Business Downloads: Access all of Amanda’s freebies in one place → Get them here
• Exclusive Discounts: Exclusive discounts on Amanda’s favourite small business tools & services → See discounts

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:00

Hello and welcome to the Growth Addicts Podcast. I'm Amanda Hughes, your host, and I am delighted to be spending the next hour with you. Thank you so much for being here. I escaped the corporate world with not much more than a burning desire to be self-employed. Fast forward 10 years and I'm running not my first, but my second small business and this time around it's with a passion to share all that I know, all that I've learned and all that I'm still learning with fellow small business owners like you. As the title of the show suggests, I am addicted to growing my small business and I know you are too. That growth means different things to different people though and that's why we talk about a whole host of subjects on Growth Addicts. Whether it's a solo episode with just me or with one of my many awesome guests, between us we share actionable tips, Instagram strategies, real-life entrepreneurial experiences and inspiring stories. So grab a pen, a cuppa, a biscuit obviously and get ready to grow that small business of yours. This is a Growth Addicts podcast. Hello and welcome to another episode of the Growth Addicts Podcast. This is the final episode of season three, can you believe it? Don't worry, that doesn't mean we're going anywhere. We just do six months blocks of seasons to give us a little breathing space in between to get ready for the next season and of course into our next season, which actually officially starts in September because in August we're going to have a couple of remakes of our most popular episodes. But in September, I am delighted to announce that the podcast will be going a so we've gone from monthly to twice monthly and now from September 2025 we will be going weekly I cannot wait to get stuck in the lineup of guests we have for you is just out of this world I have some awesome solo episodes that I want to get out there with you as well There is so much going on. You're going to absolutely love it. On today's episode, I am joined by Kirsty of Sky Rose Coaching and the founder of Sober Buzz CIC, which is a community interest company. Kirstie is a sober life coach, sober curious life coach. She herself is sober but she can coach you through sober curiosity or if you want to live a sober life in today. Kirstie shares with us her deeply personal experience with alcohol, why she stopped, why she had to stop. and what that sober journey looked like, the highs, the lows and everything in between. And would you believe, although this is a very serious subject, we actually managed to have a bit of a laugh through it and I hope that you can too. But the very serious tone today is, of course, that the dangers of alcohol, the dangers of abusing alcohol. And if you can relate to anything that's spoke about today, please do reach out to Kirsty. Kirsty mentions a few other resources there as well, like AA, Alcoholics Anonymous. Everything here that we talk about today will be linked to in the show notes, including how to contact Kirsty. So you're just one click away from support. If anything that you hear today resonates deeply with you or it's something that you'd like to explore or or something that you urgently need help with, whatever your situation might be, do enjoy and I hope it's helpful as always. And I will see you in season four beginning in September with our weekly episodes. Thank you. KM Accountancy is a proactive and approachable accountant you've been searching for. Both friendly and knowledgeable, Kirstie is dedicated to making your financial experience seamless. Whether you're a business owner in need of strategic monthly support or you just need help with your tax return, Kirsty and her team's tailored approach guarantees smooth sailing towards your financial objectives. Head to kmaccountancy.co.uk for more information. Welcome, how are you? Hello, I'm really good, how are you? Good, yeah, I'm grand, thanks. The sun's shining, it's all good. Where are you joining us from today?

SPEAKER_00: 3:54

I am in not-so-sunny Portobello, just outside Edinburgh, by the beach.

SPEAKER_01: 3:59

Yep, and of course, if anyone's following Kirstie on Instagram, you'll know that you're a regular morning sea dipper. I am. Jellyfish.

SPEAKER_00: 4:06

I am. I was in again this morning. I'm in more often than I'm not, and I absolutely love it. And I'm getting used to being stung now. I wouldn't go in and I was like, oh, those things aren't that bad.

SPEAKER_01: 4:16

Honestly, you're actually getting stung. What's it feel like? I don't think I've ever been stung with a jellyfish.

SPEAKER_00: 4:23

It's not like I thought I'd be screaming like, ah, you just feel it and you're like, oh, and then it feels like a nettle sting. By the time I've walked home, which isn't far, nothing's there. Like it's not, it's so... I had stopped going in because of the jellyfish for years, but now I just swim past them and just say hi to them.

SPEAKER_01: 4:40

My sister and a group of friends that I do yoga with, no, I don't do the cold water dipping. I have tried it several times. It's just not for me and I've made peace with that. But I'll need to let them know that, that actually these things are fine because Ayrshire beaches are full of jellyfish at the minute. Anyway, if you think you've tuned in for a cold water dipping episode, you're mistaken. Sorry. What I'm talking to Kirsty about today is, of course, I'll I hope you're having a super life. sober curious all of the things round about what's known in Scotland I don't know if it's a worldwide thing is the demon drink is that a Scottish thing Kirsty?

SPEAKER_00: 5:15

It might well be yep or what's your poison the poison

SPEAKER_01: 5:18

oh gosh yeah of course so can we just start at the beginning Kirsty can you just tell us your experience with alcohol and what led you to become sober curious and then completely sober

SPEAKER_00: 5:29

well I was never sober curious I think that's a really important thing to say okay I got sober when I was 41 so seven and a half years ago I got sober and I was And I'd known since I was 27, a year after I had my daughter, I've got one adult daughter now, that I had a serious issue with alcohol because it was just causing major problems. And I was one of these people that blacked out and stuff. It took me 14 years to kick it for good. And I never once thought about being completely sober. I tried. It was almost like mental arithmetic, mathematics, how I could... moderate, if I didn't drink wine, if I only drank this, you know, back and forth, back and forth. And it's quite a well-known story, so I don't mind sharing it, but I was really, really bad with the drink by the time I stopped. And I had to sign into a crisis centre. There's a great crisis centre here in Edinburgh, the Edinburgh Crisis Centre, because I stopped drinking between Christmas and New Year, and the doctors weren't open. And I thought I was going to die, and what I mean by that is I thought my body was about to give up that morning, and Mentally, I was just done. Prior to that, eight years before that, we lost my mum very suddenly and something that I hear from a lot of my clients as well is we don't know how to deal with that sort of, well, let's talk about grief in this country, you know, and what do people often say? Have a drink. So I took that on board, absolutely, and I also totally bought into Mummy Needs a Wine. I've been a single parent my whole life and I'm actually very proud of that now. I used to be a bit ashamed of that. I had a really stressful corporate job for years. So I was working really long days. So I could have three days off because my mum was my childcare. She'd passed away. And I was just, I believed so much that I, and the language I used was, I deserve a drink. I need a drink. And people in my corporate job would say to me, oh my God, you've had a hard day today. I dealt with escalated complaints for a major energy company. So nobody was throwing up, thanking for their electricity. But people were saying, And I hear this again from my clients. People were saying that, you know, my managers, my colleagues and my team were saying, my God, that's been a hard day. Have a drink. You'll be having a drink tonight. Now, of course, it's not their problem that I drank. However, I just thought it was really normal. And I didn't know how else to deal with anxiety, upset, anger, all these things.

SPEAKER_01: 7:48

And is that, sorry Kirstie, is that how your drinking started? to manage those sort of symptoms or had it started long before that? Long before that. So if we go

SPEAKER_00: 7:58

right back to when I started drinking, like a lot of people, a hundred years ago, I was 14. And I mean, it's not funny, but I got my stomach pumped the first time I got drunk. I was just a wee lassie. And I always say that on the Friday of leaving school, and then this happened at the weekend and I had to turn into school on the Monday. My mother would never have let me take time off. And I had to be Sunday off. that I wasn't. I had to brass it out. I had to pretend it was fine. I was mortified. Everybody knew. And then I was very, very lucky that I went travelling at quite a young age. When I think about it now, I wouldn't let Sky, my daughter, go, but I was just almost 18 when I went abroad for the first time. And I've travelled with techno sound systems now. I'm really into techno music. So there was a lot of drugs and alcohol involved in that. It wasn't a huge problem for me then. I had zero responsibilities. I was living in a bus. I was travelling all around Europe, living my best life. Came home, and this is where the problem happened. Came home, partied hard, fell in love. I was hoping to make money and go abroad again. I fell in love with Skye's dad. We had Skye. My relationship broke up. All my friends were still partying. My friends have got kids, but they're just starting secondary now, so there's a huge age gap. My daughter's coming up for 22. So I was drinking on the weekends that Skye was at her dad's. And then I started drinking at home. And, you know, this glass of wine. Mummy needs a wine. I'm, you know, doing all this alone. And I started drinking every night. I was opening a big bag of crisps for my tea when Skye was in her bed. But by the time I was 41, I was... drinking most nights three bottles of wine a night

SPEAKER_01: 9:31

of course this stressful job then just exaggerated things even more

SPEAKER_00: 9:35

absolutely and when you said about being sober curious and I laughed I had never done dry January sober I used to think those people were boring I'd think what are they doing that for I had the worst mindset around people who were sober curious or who were moderate drinkers or who didn't drink you know I would say awful things like I don't trust her she doesn't drink Gosh,

SPEAKER_01: 9:59

it is such a serious subject, but you make me laugh.

SPEAKER_00: 10:02

I know we spoke about sea swimming in the beginning. I used to look at sea swimmers and think, what wankers. And it almost put me off doing it. And I think so many of us are carrying these beliefs that we don't question and they can stop us doing the things that we have to do. So in 2017 in December at the Crisis Centre, that was it. I never drank again, which makes it sound very easy. It wasn't easy at all in the beginning, but I have never, ever looked back. It's the best thing ever. out of everything I've ever done in my 48 years. It's the best thing and I love it.

SPEAKER_01: 10:34

If you know me by now, you'll know that I love social media and I've had great success growing my business there on various platforms. And now it's time to share that success with you. I've created a mentor group dedicated to helping small business owners just like you get seen and get sales on social media, aptly called Get Seen Get Sales. Not only will the group help you grow on socials, but it's a whole support system outside of that too, with live monthly workshops and things like Email marketing, creating standout graphics and much more than that. So whether you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed with socials or just ready to grow your business, we have got you. Check out the show notes for the link and come and join us inside. And so what was the moment that arrived you up to that point then between Christmas and New Year when you went to the crisis centre? Was there something happened? Oh my God, yeah. Was there a moment of clarity?

SPEAKER_00: 11:23

Well, my birthday's in December. My mum's anniversary's just two days before my birthday. Christmas I struggled with because I haven't lost my mum I'm very comfortable to say this I know other people will be like oh you shouldn't talk like that about yourself but I was very comfortable in the victim mode nobody knows what it's like for me it is so hard for me I'm a single mum I've lost my mum so I just had kicked the arse clean out of it and I'm also a football fan I'm a Hearts fan. And it was a Hearts Hibs Derby that I'd been at. I had taken lots of drugs, drunk lots, woke up in the morning and once again could not remember how I'd got home. The house was a disaster. Phoned my best friend. She came down. But that morning I actually got on my knees and I just was like, I cannae do this anymore. I don't know if I spoke to the universe. Somebody once said to me, I wonder if you spoke to your mum, which I love. My mum hated me drinking. but something happened and I was very unwell though Amanda I think I had to take about three months off my job I had an amazing manager thankfully but I was signed off for about three months and yeah I was just an absolute wreck and I knew I couldn't I knew I didn't have it in me I didn't have it in me to have another episode like that that's how I got sober and I didn't use what people see as the normal routes so I didn't do AA I tried AA when I was 27 wasn't for me I just started really caring for myself. So I started journaling as well. I'm a prolific journaler. And I used to think, how can I care for myself today? And later on, much later on, I would ask myself and I still ask myself, how can I love myself today? Because I do love who I am and I love myself. And to care for myself, it was going to my bed. It was being honest with my loved ones. I was in a relationship at the time. We didn't live together. It was staying away from certain people, family included. And for the first time ever, I was showing myself the care and compassion that my mother had given me. My mother adored me and my brother and my bear. And she adored my bear as well. And I was looking externally continually for this care and this compassion. And I'm able to give it to myself still. There's days where I have to check myself because I still have negative self-talk. I will never drink again, though. I mean, for all the tea in China, I would never, ever drink again.

SPEAKER_01: 13:34

How powerful that must feel to be able to say that and know with absolute certainty that you mean it.

SPEAKER_00: 13:40

Yeah, 100%. And the first year, Amanda, that, you know, for me once I got into the groove of it I always think when I think about it I always think then I got into this groove of my god I'm still not drinking I'm still not drinking I just had it in my sights that it's different for everybody and I've worked with thousands of people one to one and in groups and stuff but for me I thought I need to get to the year I need to get to the year I got to that year and as I said my birthday's in December so my soberversary is in December And for me, it's a better celebration than my birthday. And when I got to that year, I just knew that was it. Like I was so, so determined to get to the year. And I was like, never, ever am I touching drugs and alcohol again.

SPEAKER_01: 14:18

wow good for you Kirsty absolutely fantastic I mean you're saying things got really bad then is that what bad looked like bad looked like taking three months off your work and that was all alcohol related yeah and so you you were physically ill as well was there was there actual physical illness symptoms through drinking as well what did that bad look like

SPEAKER_00: 14:38

so I was blacking out I was waking up on my sofa and you don't have to take myself to bed with my daughter in the house I lost so many possessions I lost friendships and relationships broke down The physical symptoms where I thought I had IBS, I don't have IBS, the worst anxiety ever. I need to caveat this by saying with my doctor's help, after I was a year sober, I came off all mental health medication. I would go back on it in a heartbeat if I needed it, but I've never needed it for six and a half years. I thought that I had chronic anxiety. It wasn't. It was the alcohol. Now, like many women my age, I have got ADHD, which was undiagnosed. In fact, it was misdiagnosed. I would never have found out about that and been able to manage that till I came off the alcohol. And I work with so many women who've been diagnosed with ADHD and they realise that alcohol is like petrol on a fire. The three months of work, it was just really trying to get myself eating properly, drinking water, getting my sleep back. My sleep was so bad for such a long time. I just didn't trust myself. I was scared in my own shadow. I had zero confidence because what I used to say was, I'm off it. That's me. I'm having a week off it. I'm not doing it anymore. I'll be back on it. So when you continually tell yourself something like that, I'm not drinking wine I'm not drinking this week whatever it may be and then you do that thing your confidence is just slowly slowly getting chipped to me because you're no trust in yourself I had zero trust in myself oh my goodness I mean I'm happy to share this but I was up to here with debt like the debt was I've not long paid off my debt and I'm seven and a half years sober I had risky behaviours I had no care for my well-being and I'm a mother you know and that's maybe shocking for some people to hear but I just didn't I just couldn't imagine not drinking like for me I still believe that the I was the only one doing it wrong and somehow there must be a magic way to drink this stuff and be okay

SPEAKER_01: 16:30

Gosh and so yeah when you say you were bad then that's what bad looked like certainly for you and that makes a lot of sense and so then it was approaching your mum's anniversary and your birthday of the December 7 and a bit years ago and you just knew you couldn't go on like that then and then you had to chat with yourself and your higher self whatever that might be whether it was your mum or just putting it out there and then arrived at the crisis centre and so then what did that early time of sobriety or getting sober look like? Was there anything that was really surprising to you? Did you have any expectations? What did

SPEAKER_00: 17:04

it look like? I understood what self-care was as in like I used to hear about journaling and meditation and I started throwing myself into that like I tried absolutely everything I remember downloading Insight Timer which is a really good meditation app which is free and just listening to anything I couldn't sit on my arse I have to tell you this because I always say like oh yeah I read Unexpected Joy Being Sober I did not read it I listened to it on Audible because at my house I just went from one end of the house to the other and just gutted it and cleaned it and kept really really busy I started my gratitude practice on the day that I stopped drinking. And all my gratitude practice was Sky, which is my daughter, my best friend Alison that came down, my then partner, and that I was alive. And I still do my gratitude practice every single day. And it's something that I truly, truly believe is the cornerstone of my recovery, if you want to call it that. And is this something you would have previously have mocked before? Yeah, or I'd have thought, how can that make any difference? But everything that I've just told you that I put on day one's gratitude, I had that the day before when I was drinking but I thought that I was a victim I didn't have anything good going for me but I had Skye I had Alison I had my then partner and I was alive and I try to almost every day put down one reason that I'm grateful to my sobriety and to be honest with you my life wouldn't be I wouldn't have anything that I've got I wouldn't have a business I wouldn't have the relationship that I've got with my family with my daughter I go on I take my daughter raving like the fact that I know I'll never be drunk she's anti-techno like me all the amazing stuff that I get to do I've got a community interest company that I run I swim in the sea in the morning like almost everything that I can tie in with what's great about my life is because I stopped doing the one thing that was completely destroying me

SPEAKER_01: 18:46

and then so that I guess was the sort of surprising things as things that you'd previously thought were fair to quote yourself for wankers swimming in the sea journaling that sort of thing actually became the cornerstone then and still now to this day you're sober

SPEAKER_00: 19:03

you know people think they can't change I was that person you know I didn't believe these things were for me I'm from a council estate in a place called Lock End in Edinburgh and I mean you couldn't get more working class than me and I'm now a lassie that is a life coach I remember like trying to tell people I was a life coach and like well I'm a life coach because I think it's just that felt wanky as well but I completely retrained you know I was coaching in my job but It was like I started to believe that change not only was possible, but it was the best thing, you know, for me. And my signature course, my eight week course is perfect. pretty much based around how I got sober which I can adapt for individual people but it was like looking at my values looking at my boundaries looking at my triggers looking at my gratitudes looking at my whys like these are really important things if you want to make any change you'll know your why is so important in business you know we can't really do anything without that

SPEAKER_01: 19:57

I'd love this I just can't help but feel empowered listening to that like The one thing I think you can never, you can never change other people. We've all tried, haven't we? But you can totally change yourself. You're totally in control. It's not easy, but it can be done. And so you touched on your work and you're now a Sober Curious Life coach and got your community interest company. So tell me, Kirstie, how did this whole experience lead to you then setting up a business around this? I mean, was that something you expected? Okay, quick pause from our conversation because I'm wondering how you'd feel if I said I could give you a free£50 today. Yep, if you have been thinking about moving your business banking recently or perhaps you don't have a business bank and I can highly recommend Monzo and if you're opening an account with them via the link in the show notes you are getting a free£50 for nothing just for joining Monzo is free to bank with I bank with them personally and it's so easy to use and also they won the best business banking provider in the UK 2024 so if you don't have a business bank account yet or you'd like to change from where you are just now to free business banking and£50 on your account the link is in the show notes today head over there and and get it done well this

SPEAKER_00: 21:09

is the craziest part of my story so when I was a year and a half sober I won a trip to Thailand to a wellness retreat on Instagram I took my best friend Alison the girl that came that morning we got to the airport in Thailand and we were both like we're about to be kidnapped it just felt so bizarre we got picked up and we went to this wellness retreat and it was probably one of the most important times of my life and I met a life coach called Sam who I still stay in touch with I'd never met a life coach before but as I say I'd coached corporately And I got talking to her and I just was like, I know I want more. And she's like, you have to do something with your sobriety. And I was like, no, definitely not. That's, you know, this is just for me. And I came back to Edinburgh and there was chatty VR, voluntary redundancy at the company I was working for. And I said to my boss, I want it. And she was like, you're not going to get it. You're one of our high performing employees. managers anyway long story short I got VR I got voluntary redundancy I took a job in Stockton Pridham where I worked for a year which I loved and I've volunteered in the criminal justice system since then I retrained as a transformational life coach. I got a diploma in transformational coaching with Animas. I chose them because they're recognised by the International Coaching Federation. That was important to me. People contact me a lot to say, I'd like to be a coach. How did you do it? And I immersed myself in everything and I still volunteer within addiction recovery. I've done my work within the prisons. I've volunteered in the prisons. I volunteer in the community. Because the most important thing that I've done in my life is made that change with alcohol. And I know that I can help other people, you know, do similar or support people. I didn't think I was going to do stuff about my sobriety. And I've done what you would maybe just call general life coaching. And I still do. Like people contact me that have worked with me in the past. A lot of sober people contact me for me to support them in other things because sober people tend to work with sober people. I started Sober Buzz as a microblog. Just, you know, talking about how great it was. Nobody was talking empowered about being sober all those years ago. And I was like, this is the best thing ever. And then during lockdown, Sober Buzz became much more than just a microblog. There were so many people contacting me to say that they were really struggling. And I was in the middle of my coaching qualification. So I was like, hey, I'll just do some online Zooms. I think by the end of it, there was three a week. And I've got a board of directors and they're all sober women. And there are people that I've supported in many ways. I've got a lawyer, I've got an accountant, I've got somebody that works in the third sector. And yeah, that's come from that. And now if somebody had told me eight years ago, so seven and a half years sober, if somebody said eight years ago, Kirsty, you'll be... I mean, I'm on the telly, never had Amanda, as you know.

SPEAKER_01: 23:40

I do, I do.

SPEAKER_00: 23:41

People are like, Kirsty, in eight years, the BBC will contact you if they've got anything to do with sobriety. You'll have a community interest company and you'll be supported. I'd have been thinking, you're off your head.

SPEAKER_01: 23:50

You're clearly drunk.

SPEAKER_00: 23:52

Totally, totally. Like, what are you on? Like, what's going on? when I say my life has changed completely I mean it truly has like it couldn't be more different from what I was eight years ago

SPEAKER_01: 24:04

gosh I'm so proud of you honestly that is just incredible I can't help but feel so proud of you that is an incredible well I'm proud of you because I know your story So I'm proud of you. You're that love between us. But thank you so much for saying that. Oh, absolutely. That's incredible. So let's think about our audience today then. Small business owners. We are small business owners. And it's busy. And there's often other carer responsibilities, often other jobs. A lot of our listeners are working nine to five still while building their business up, as I did at the start as well. Caring responsibilities, kids, elderly parents, you name it, it's busy. It's a busy, busy time. And like you tapped into earlier on, the whole mummy needs a wine and everyone around you saying, God, have a drink or whatever. You know, it's just such a common thing. I think particularly it seems to be in Scotland, doesn't it? Yeah. To encourage people to drink and there's no harm in it. There's no harm. If you're a small business owner and you're as busy as that and you are drinking, how would that affect your daily life, decision making, ability to show up? I mean, surely it can only have a negative impact and not really actually help anything at all.

SPEAKER_00: 25:15

Yeah. And I think what you said there, one of the points you made there is so important, which is, you know, people don't really mean any harm. And, you know, and you could be in your wee bubble thinking, right, I'm going to do my best not to drink. And then your partner says, come on, you look stressed out. Let's have a drink. And the trouble is we never question it. So when we think about that, I need a, you need a, what do we really need? But the impact that that can have on us, for me personally, So many people message me to tell me they're sleeping better. And if I don't do indeed the morning, they can just put my headstone, curse to help people sleep better. Because I know the last time I slept really badly was when I adopted my cats a few years ago and no sleepers. I was hanging on by a thread. Like it was just, just awful. So particularly women of a certain age, as we get a perimenopause age, our sleep can be quite disruptive anyway. Add alcohol to the mix. And it's just not great. It's a disruptive sleeper. We're waking up during the night, not getting back to sleep. Already we're on the back foot when we wake up in the morning. And as we know, our to-do list can be like arms long. And I get that thing about other responsibilities. I've got an elderly parent. So already we're on the back foot. We're tired. We're lethargic. Then we start to question our ability, our confidence. Or maybe we've drank around people that were like, what did I say to them last night? Did I say something silly? Checking your phone. And it really impacts our confidence and confidence I work with so many women who tell me all these amazing things they do. I do work with men as well, but it's mostly women. Yet they don't see how great they are because when people believe they've got an issue with alcohol. So most of them are holding it very, very privately because there's such shame around it. And you mentioned here in Scotland, I work with people all over the world, believe it or not. And even in England, there's a very similar thing going on down there. You know, have a drink, have a drink. We're carrying the shame around to us. We're hoping nobody's seeing that, you know, we've let something slide. Do they think I'm drinking too much? We don't want to mention it. So we start playing small. And I am here to help women play big. I believe we need more women in business. We need more women solo business owners or entrepreneurs because men have their benefits. Of course, I'm sure they do. But women have so much to give. And from a very early age, we've been told we have to look this way. We have to do this thing. And then we're adding this shame about our drinking. Now, when you've got that shame about your drinking, you believe it's the only thing going for you, the only thing about you, and it's not. And I help my clients separate themselves from this problem that we're going to solve and get them to look this way and see everything that's going well. You're bringing up the kids, you're running the house, you're managing to eat three meals a day, you're funny, you're intelligent, whatever it might be that they bring to the table. But for so long, they've carried this thing around. Oh God, am I drinking too much? Am I making a fool of myself when I drink? And as we start to remove them or even just, people don't have to stop drinking forever, that terrifies them. But even as we just take a break and get further from that and give them a bit of space to breathe and realise, actually, I'm not just Kirsty that drinks too much wine. I'm Kirsty that's been really supportive to her family, that's got a good sense of humour, that's a great friend, you know, all this other stuff. And finally, they start to get that bit of confidence back. The money that we save, I checked today because I knew I was talking to you. My I am sober app tells me I've saved£55,000. Now, I've no idea where that is. It's all the books I read. I read so

SPEAKER_01: 28:27

many books. Out of hand, out of hand, buying books, honestly. I've got like three in the go at any one time. Anyway.

SPEAKER_00: 28:34

I can't do that. I just have books looking at me, like giving me dirty looks on the bed. You've brought another one home and I'm like, oh my God, yes I have. The money that we can save, and I'm not saying pumping it into your business. I mean like having a massage, you know, getting your hair cut. taking yourself out for a lovely lunch or whatever. You know, women tend to be at the bottom of their to-do list. And I really help them bump it up because when we get on a plane and they say to us, put your oxygen mask on first, they're saying that for a reason. Because when our cups are empty, we are not able to support anybody. You know, so I really help my clients because they've got this thought that if they need to de-stress or unwind... The easiest thing to do is to reach for a glass. And I often say the one thing that I thought was unwinding me was unravelling me and it was completely just making me fall apart. I support people to have other coping mechanisms, to be able to have their needs met, whether they're verbalising or whether they're just doing it for themselves. And I work with so many small business owners. I work with so many people in the health and wellness industry. yoga teachers meditators teachers people that run retreats because they all know something's not quite right and they know if it's having any negative impact on your life Amanda so if we were eating and I always use this but it's a great way to describe it if we were allergic to pizza we would sorry dairy we would stop eating so many pizzas we really really would if alcohol is having any negative impact on your life maybe interrupting your sleep giving you a sore head acid reflux IBS style symptoms the thing to do is is to take a break And to see how life is without it. Now, if we're feeling all those things I've just mentioned, those physical things, I've not even mentioned the mental things, the anxiety, the depression, the lack of self-worth. It's very hard to run a business when you're running on empty and you've got all these other things there as well.

SPEAKER_01: 30:27

And so you think, OK, I've had a really busy day. It's just been all the tabs are open. My head's about to explode. Kids are down. I'm going to have a glass of wine that turns into a bottle of wine. you think that's what's helping you relax. But like you say, you think that's relaxing, but it's actually unravelling you.

SPEAKER_00: 30:44

Yeah, to unwind, to unravelling. You

SPEAKER_01: 30:46

think it's unwinding you. Yeah, but it's actually unravelling you because although you think that's helping there and then in the moment, the whole ripple effect of that and the consequences of that for the next day and the day after that, and even the night, you're not going to sleep well. It's just going to make things worse. Yeah. But why do you think, as you say there, if you knew you were severely dairy intolerant, you would start to cut that out to see how you go on. So why do you think it's different with alcohol that there's such a struggle there to cut it out?

SPEAKER_00: 31:12

A number of reasons, I think. And one of the things is I'd say it's a bit Russian roulette. So I'll hear people say to me, I actually had a bottle of wine last Tuesday and I felt fine the next game day. But then I had a bottle of wine on the Friday and I was hellish on the Saturday. These symptoms that I've just mentioned to you, acid reflux, sore tummy, sore head, that's your body telling you that it can't cope with that. You know, there's something going on. It's intolerant in some way at that point. Sadly, as we get older, we have an enzyme that changes in our tummy. We don't have as much water in our muscles and carrying in our body. So it's harder to break down alcohol. Some days you might feel slightly better than other days. So people are like, oh, but it was okay that time. And I don't want to be the odd one out. And the one I hear the most is, I don't want people to think that I've got a serious problem. What I talk to my clients about is alcohol. This is an empowering decision because you're doing something that's actually going to level up your life. So if somebody comes to you, so if everybody's listening and they're like, maybe that would be me. So if you want to not drink this weekend, right, or whatever, next time you've got an event and somebody says to you, why are you not drinking? If you turn around and go, oh God, I just can't handle it anymore. I'm feeling like, whatever or I made a bit of a fool of myself last time people will go Amanda is anybody so daft we've all been there we're totally fine have a drink now

SPEAKER_01: 32:27

there's a whole sketch about it that is it still game or something have a drink take a drink

SPEAKER_00: 32:33

but if we rewind and go into that situation and say somebody says have a drink and you say I'm not drinking and they say go and just have one and you say oh my god I have not drank for one week two weeks three weeks whatever I feel amazing my sleep is so good I can actually see my eyes look clearer my skin looks clearer It's very difficult for somebody to turn around and go... Yeah, but I don't want you to have all that great stuff. So think about the positives that you're getting from not drinking and go into that conversation with the positives, even if you're having to make that up a little bit because you know that you will be feeling that way if you don't drink that night.

SPEAKER_01: 33:04

Gosh, just you even describing that, I can feel the shift of power in that conversation because you're belittling yourself a wee bit by saying, oh yeah, I've made a bit of a fool of myself and whatever and they've got the power to encourage you and convince you that you're fine and that was just a one-off and it'll be fine, come on. But as soon as you take that power and really own your decisions, oh, it's a total shift, as you say. And the other person would just be like, okay. I mean, you can't be like, who could diss that? The things that you're describing there.

SPEAKER_00: 33:33

Yeah. And if anybody listening decides to do that, I think, okay, what I'm going to do is I'm going to have an alcohol-free night or weekend or whatever it may be. It doesn't matter. It can be anything. What I would really recommend that you do is the next again morning when you wake up, smug as fuck, as we say in the sober world, Get in your journal or on the notes on your phone. That's another good thing to say is some people are a bit nervous about writing in a journal. Do the notes on your phone and just write how proud you are of yourself because I know, for 100% I know, that you've been so negative on yourself when you've drank. So I want you to put as much energy into when you don't drink. I am so proud of myself. I did it. I came home when I said I was going to come home. I'm feeling good today. I've got the whole day ahead of me just to chill out on my city and read a book, whatever it may be. Put as much energy into... bigging yourself up as you do for knocking yourself down because we've got a long way to go we've knocked ourselves down for years and years and years and I am my client's biggest cheerleader and if they don't see how well they're doing I will cheer them on and eventually they're their own cheerleaders they're turning into their friends and saying oh my god I feel amazing and it wasn't a big thing for me at the time and probably more so now you know a lot of people say and I'm actually noticing that I'm not carrying as much weight around my middle and our bodies actually put fat protective fat around our livers when we're maybe drinking too much I used to think I was shaped like a wheat a bit because I always say this but actually I've got a really small waist and I didn't really notice that until I got further into my sobriety and I see it now I've actually got quite a defined figure so for some people they can be saying and do you know what I've finally got into those jeans that I was talking about or you know whatever it is that makes you feel good for me it's my skin although I've got a belt for the day but my skin's much cleaner I just like myself more and if you go in feeling that way and saying nah I feel great we're out of it thanks but you carry on that's what I would say you carry on I'm not asking you to stop but I'm not going to do it

SPEAKER_01: 35:24

oh absolutely and I find myself in those scenarios as well so I um I've never felt like I've had a problem with drinking. I went hell for leather with it in my 20s, but it was always managed. It was weekends, it was binge drinking, it was what everybody else was doing. And so I grew up with alcoholic parents on a council estate, exactly as you described there. It was a very generational thing. I mean, everybody's, most parents were doing it, but I think now looking back, probably not to the extreme that ours were. And I don't know if that in some way subconsciously shaped my relationship with alcohol, but I've always been able to sort of keep it in check because I've seen the damage it does but now I've got four year old twins now and there's nothing anybody could say to me to make me have a drink and wake up with them the next day with a hangover honestly nothing because it's a new type of hell to wake up with two four-year-olds jumping on you when you get up and when you do things, you know, they're oblivious and you feel like all those things you've just mentioned, the physical, the mental, the everything, it's just awful for you, awful for them. So that's just now what I will say. No, I've got the kids in the morning. End of.

SPEAKER_00: 36:38

That's actually something you said there because I think it's a really important point to make and it does help a lot of people. So we talk more and more, it's a very American term but it's definitely coming here, we talk more and more about alcohol use disorder and that an umbrella term and on one end we can have the people that my father would think was an alcoholic which is the poor souls sitting in a shop doorway drinking all the way to the other end to the binge drinkers so you know we can all be underneath that umbrella it doesn't have to be so black and white if you're under there and there feels like there's something negative going on you don't have to be like oh my god I must be an alcoholic you can just be like actually there's something when I use that there's a bit of a disorder going on in my life so you know I don't want to use it And the work that I've done in the prisons and the work that I do in the community, what I hear the most from people is, my such and such was a heavy drinker, my father, my mother, my uncle, my auntie. I have yet to speak to anybody that hasn't said to me, because everybody talks to me about alcohol, that they've got somebody in their family that has alcoholism or alcohol use disorder. It is rife. And we're becoming more and more health conscious. I'm seeing so many young women. Last year, I worked with so many lassies who I've kept in touch with in their mid-20s and they're still all sober because they're like, stuff

SPEAKER_01: 37:47

that. Like, I want to live my life. It's less of a thing when I was in my 20s. It was just what we did. And I never, ever questioned it because I was hungover the next day and that was the end of it, really. And so were my friends. And so that I never ever questioned it. But now, looking back at this new generation who are so fresh and they're going out and really loving life and without the hangovers and without the increased drinking, you do think, hmm, maybe I could have done things a bit differently there. But a lot of time, you know, you're shaped by your environment, aren't you? I mean, you're younger and you've not got that life experience behind you. But no, good on them. Good on them if there's a whole new generation of young adults who are choosing to be sober because it's not good for you. It's really not good for you at all. And so if we're trying to break that whole mummy needs a wine, I need a wine to unwind, to have a drink, people are encouraging you to do that. You've touched on a few other things that you can do, that you do. You mentioned journaling quite a lot. What can we start to replace that with? Because I'd imagine there might be a concern there of replacing it with other, maybe not equally, but just as crap things, perhaps sugar, sweets. I don't know. You could easily replace one thing jump out of the fire into the frying pan kind of thing. What other alternatives then, you know, for our business owner audience that are having a bad day or they're having a rough week or they are struggling to cope and they've been turning to alcohol, but if they're about to, before they open that bottle of wine, what else can they do? I

SPEAKER_00: 39:14

hear what you're saying about the sugar and it was crisps for me. My God, I'm a carb. I still have to watch the carbs. It's not a huge, massive problem in the beginning because your body is looking for that sugar. If you're somebody that's having a glass of wine regularly and you stop, your body is going to crave that sugar. So it's okay to have a few sugary treats. But let's go back to the phrase that we've both used quite a lot on this call, which is, I need a drink. What do you actually need? So once we dig deeper, it's like, I just need a break or... Probably

SPEAKER_01: 39:43

need a walk.

SPEAKER_00: 39:44

A walk, yeah. I need a bit of space. I need a bit of me time. Now, I'm always acutely aware that not, I mean, I'm in a very different position from you. I live alone now. My daughter's got her own house. But there's times where I couldn't have got away from my daughter either. You know, she was, it was just her and I. So what works, you know, is it chucking your baby in a buggy and going for a walk? Is it, you know, saying to your young child, we're walking to the park tonight. If wine o'clock for you, six o'clock at night, seven o'clock at night, eight o'clock at night, disrupt that habit loop, what can you put in there instead? So my daughter was still a child when I stopped drinking. Wine o'clock for me was every day that ended in a Y. But what I used to do at the time when I would have been drinking is I'd get in the shower. wash my hair wash my face whatever you know get my comfies on so I know I wasn't going out to pick up some wine and I was listening to my audio book I was it sounds so simple but I was doing things like clearing out drawers in my kitchen in the very beginning or in my bedroom until I got past like the bit where I was white knuckling but for a lot of my clients it's just like do you know what I did instead is I put on my favourite TV programme and it went in 15 minutes 20 minutes but I look at the root cause like you know I sit with my clients and look at what is it that's making you really go for that drink so it really depends on the thing a lot of them have to have very serious conversations with their partners like I need you to help a little bit more or I just need a wee bit me time if you have your time in the morning going to the gym can I have maybe like 20 minutes a half an hour at night to go and do a yoga class in the bedroom there's so much online now which is really good isn't it I think it's really important as well to say that alcohol free drinks are great when clients work with me some of them want to moderate which is a whole different story but anyway if you're going to moderate you don't drink if you're angry you don't drink if you're stressed you don't drink if your husband's been a prick your wife's been an asshole whatever you drink to celebrate or to chill out or to enjoy a nice meal right so alcohol free drinks can be used in the same way I work a weekend but I still have the Friday feeling and I've got a garden and I love a cold, a nice cold alcohol-free lager in the garden because I'm like, ah, it's Friday, I'm having a wee alcohol-free beer and it's because I'm celebrating, it's a Friday night, that feels good. There's so many great websites, Wise Bartenders, a belter, where you can pretty much get anything alcohol-free and it can be nice still to sit with your partner and there's a bit of theatre important, a nice glass, you know, rather than just sitting there with your fizzy pop or whatever, fizzy juice. So it's okay to think, well, Well, I'll just have an alcohol-free drink at the weekend instead. If you're going to somebody's house, take your alcohol-free drinks. Phone ahead to wherever you're going out to eat. I always do that. I'm not going somewhere. I'm not paying good money for food if they're going to offer me a Diet Coke or a Bex Blue. You know, start to look how you can replace it in other ways. Another really... Sorry, Amanda, I just want to say one more thing on that. Another really... Take your time. Particularly in the beginning is really shift your day around a bit if you can. So maybe get a few... If you're somebody that sits up after the kids have gone to bed, drinking wine till half ten, eleven o'clock at night... which I hear all the time. That's what happens. Get into your bed a bit earlier and get up a bit earlier and that's your time. And maybe journal. How do I feel today? A great journaling prompt is how do I want to feel when I climb into bed tonight or how do I want to feel when I get up in the morning? Why am I grateful I didn't drink last night? What am I looking forward to in the week ahead? What's your intention? What's my intention for this week? Nobody says my intention for this week is to be an anxious

SPEAKER_01: 42:52

person.

SPEAKER_00: 42:52

quivering wreck by Sunday.

SPEAKER_01: 42:53

Of course, that does change it, doesn't it? And how do you want to feel? Because no one's going to choose that. Great tips, absolutely. So tell us a bit more about Sober Buzz and your other business Skyrose Coaching. Tell us about what you do there and who's it for? From precise bookkeeping to savvy tax strategies, KM Accountancy have all your needs covered. Say goodbye to financial headaches and hello to peace of mind with Kirsty by your side. Contact KM Accountancy and let Kirsty lead you to financial success. Head to I am accountancy.co.uk

SPEAKER_00: 43:24

for more information Sky Rose Coaching is named after Sky, my daughter, and Rose, my niece, who are my two biggest wives. My niece is my biggest fan. When I was on the telly, she told her school that her auntie was a non-alcoholic like the beer. Sky Rose Coaching is my private coaching practice. And I work predominantly with women, although I do work with men. And I support people to look at their relationship with alcohol, but more importantly, with themselves. I could hold MD's hand and get them sober for eight weeks, I'm pretty sure, or 12 weeks. I do two different courses. But we really do a deep dive on where you're at now. We look at our values. We look at what you want for life. We look at your goals. We look back the way to see what's happened so we can ensure if that happens again, something different happens. I've got a self-love club that I run every Saturday and Sunday morning for sober and sober curious people. We journal, we meditate, all those good self-care things that we talk about. Skyro's coaching as well. I've got a sober weekend reset so you don't even have to speak to me. It just gets emailed to you so you can have three days alcohol free. See how you get on with that.

SPEAKER_01: 44:25

See how that feels.

SPEAKER_00: 44:26

Yeah, see how it fits. Yeah. And, you know, a lot of the time people just want a break. You know, people message me and they'll say, I need a break for this, you know, because they're absolutely exhausted. Summer's a great time to take a break as well because you get to really enjoy the nice weather. weather without being hungry

SPEAKER_01: 44:39

must be a lot of pressure though in the summer though for drinking outdoor events barbecues beer gardens

SPEAKER_00: 44:46

it's pressure all year round amanda

SPEAKER_01: 44:48

true because then you know before you know it you're getting into christmas and whatnot as well and it's probably even more

SPEAKER_00: 44:53

absolutely do you know the people that work with the most at this time of year teachers. So my teachers get in touch with me and they say I can't have another seven weeks where I've just drank for the full seven weeks. Summer's a really busy time for me with teachers. People will message me and say I really want to work with you but it's my husband's birthday, I've got a work event, I'm launching a product and I say well if you're taking that you'll never find the time to work with me. I posted feedback this morning from one of my clients who's been working with me for five weeks and she's having her first ever sober holiday and she said it's amazing. She's loving it. She knew that that was coming up when she started working with me but you know I'm so proud of her for saying that there's never going to be a perfect time for me. It never is

SPEAKER_01: 45:28

for anything. Starting on Monday, starting after summer, starting at the start of the month. See if you're going to start, just start right now, even in the smallest way, start right now.

SPEAKER_00: 45:37

Totally. And I think it's hugely important for me to say as well, because everybody's kind of like, oh my God, I don't want MDs to know. Complete confidentiality when you work with me. You know, absolutely. It's an MD that DMs me You know, that's between me and that client. So yeah, that's one-to-one work. And I do the odd workshop and I've recently started doing workshops and talks for corporate people or for small businesses who want to support their Sober or Sober Curious clients, particularly coming up to Sober October. I do a lot with that. And Sober Buzz is a community interest company. Social enterprise. What does

SPEAKER_01: 46:07

that mean?

SPEAKER_00: 46:08

It's a social enterprise, but in different wording. So we're a not-for-profit company. We don't take a wage. I don't make any money from SoberBuzz. It's a liberal love. And neither do my directors. And what we do is we hold walk-in talks. So other sober, curious people come along and we just go for a wander. We rarely stand and talk about why we're sober, but people tend to start sharing because they're with other like-minded people. We had a really big event earlier this year where we had people doing yoga, sound baths, meditation. all that kind of stuff. And we're hopefully a place for education, you know, so that's when I say that I've been invited onto the TV and onto different podcasts and stuff and thank you for inviting me on today. It's because we're kind of seen as slightly different from a lot of other organisations and that we're really, really celebrating the fact that we're sober curious. I am not powerless because of alcohol. I am powerful because I don't drink alcohol. I will say for MDL, so they run a community interest company, Thoughts and Prayers, because it's not a thing to do. I, naive thought there'd be so much funding but there's not and it's quite a difficult space to be in my purpose in life spoken like a true life coach I know my purpose in life is to support and to educate and to empower as many people as possible to know that there is a life far beyond your wildest dreams past and gone home.

SPEAKER_01: 47:25

You can totally see you're so well suited to it Kirsty. So well suited to it. And so if anyone's listening who is curious then and thinking they can relate to what you're saying and they can sort of hear themselves being described in some of the chats we've just had there, where do you suggest they start?

SPEAKER_00: 47:41

Just drop me a DM. Say hi, I heard you on Amanda's podcast I've actually got a workbook as well, a 28 day workbook that gets emailed to you and you get asked to message me every seven days to let me know how you're getting on and that gives people a space to be like is this what I want come and find me at Sky Rose Coaching I am mostly on Instagram Facebook gives me the actual fear I do cross post but then I'm like oh my god somebody's commenting that's why I'm so scared

SPEAKER_01: 48:04

Kirsty and I are working on that

SPEAKER_00: 48:07

it gives me the actual fear so I'm mostly on Instagram in fact I'm on there all the time I was just saying to Amanda before we started I jump on most mornings and have a little chat I just see everybody there as my pals I never pressurise anybody and Amanda's very similar I get great joy from being in Amanda's group because it feels like a community and that's what I want with my audience and my Insta friends and I never say why did you message me five days ago you've not got back to me I would never do that people dipping in and out of my DMs all the time sometimes people just want to know if there's something on in their local area what book they could read what podcast I'm here for it all because I am the person that I needed seven and a half years years ago but couldn't

SPEAKER_01: 48:49

yeah so many good businesses are born out of that aren't they yeah who you need at a certain point in life amazing and so if someone's listening who is they know for sure that they have a problem with drinking here and they're feeling really in the thick of it really overwhelmed and thinking the shame as well of even reaching out and as you say that in itself must be even a hard thing to do because you there's admitting in that, isn't there? If you're reaching out and you're admitting that there's a problem there, what would you want them to hear today?

SPEAKER_00: 49:18

There's such strength in that admission. I mean, it's such a powerful thing to do is to ask for help. I often think of shame being like the little yucky things in Gremlins. Remember before they pop out like it's all sticky and it's in the dark? And I think as soon, I mean, Brené Brown says it better than me, but I think as soon as we start to bring that out into the light, you know, that vulnerability that we have with somebody like me or somebody like me I should imagine you're giving its power away you're saying actually no longer am I going to be tied to that thing I'm owning it and I'm ready to make a change and if I don't think that I can help you you know if you're like I can't afford to work with you or I will help you find a way to make it work you know AA didn't work for me but there's other things smart recovery and stuff and I'm well versed in it all and I pretty much know people in every area Scotland at least where there might be support groups or other things going on I work with people that are in AA because they want they really enjoy the self-love part that I do for me it's all about self-love that's why I stopped drinking so I could start caring for myself and loving myself I would absolutely champion you if you said I finally feel like I want to make a change and that's often and I know it's cheesy and it's been said many times but that's often the hardest part you know it's finally saying it clients will be talking to me and they're like oh I'm crying again and I say well I always worry if people didn't cry because it's a huge and people are offloading or finally bringing to the light things that they've not shared with anybody and I can hold that for them because I've either been there or I've held that space for other people and

SPEAKER_01: 50:52

yeah there's no judgment

SPEAKER_00: 50:53

none of my god absolutely not I have a bloody cheek yeah

SPEAKER_01: 50:58

Well, you've heard Kirsty's story, so she's not going to judge. I don't think there's anything anyone could tell you that would shock you.

SPEAKER_00: 51:05

My first job in the prison, right, I'd done triage. So I actually had keys to the halls and stuff, Amanda, can you believe it? So I'd go in and people would come that wanted to engage with the charity, you know, and they'd come and they'd speak to me and they would share whatever was going on in their life, you know, and I had to keep a poker face because, I mean, you were hearing all sorts of stuff from these people. I've heard it all, I should imagine. And even there, I didn't put shame on those people. You know, they needed support as much as anybody else. And I'm honoured. I am absolutely honoured to do this. People stop me and chat to me. People come to my, I do in-person events occasionally. And I leave these things thinking, oh my God, like how lucky am I that I get to help that person unburden themselves with whatever. And I certainly, I certainly don't think any less of a person. I think, oh my God, what a badass they are.

SPEAKER_01: 51:53

yep taking ownership and doing something about it but it's going to feel great so if that is you taking the first step it's going to feel bloody amazing isn't it totally go for it so do you think there's anything we've not covered today Kirstie that you'd like people to hear yeah I just want people to know I still go out Okay, yep, of course, with the socialising look, alcohol-free.

SPEAKER_00: 52:12

Yeah, I touched on it. I really, really enjoy techno music still to this day and I've just booked up to go and listen to some in a couple of months. I still go out. My priorities have clearly changed. I have a wee Red Bull before I go out to keep me awake or maybe a coffee, a danger coffee at six at night. I still go out for meals. I always make sure I'm going somewhere that has things that I want to have. I have really good boundaries. I leave early if I want to leave early. My life certainly hasn't just become swimming in the sea and going to bed early, although that's two of my favourite things. I still love to socialise. I still love to meet people. I date. People worry about going on dates. I'm single. I go out on dates. I'm very comfortable to say I don't drink on those things. Life hasn't changed massively because I don't drink, as in I still have a social life. It's just much more enjoyable and I remember it all now.

SPEAKER_01: 53:00

That is good to hear, important to hear, because you must wonder if alcohol is a huge part of your social life. There must be a bit of a fear about what that looks like afterwards, how your friends are going to react, how your social circles are going to react. And that's something that you can give us lived experience of as well. Totally.

SPEAKER_00: 53:16

And it's stuff that's hugely important that we do. There's no point in you just having these eight weeks, 12 weeks cocooned. I actively encourage unless the person doesn't go out normally you know and they just socialise with their partner or whatever but you know I would say to my clients get yourself a lunch out or a dinner out you know while you're working with me and let's make this work for you so you're still getting the enjoyment I mean I love food I love music I love I don't want to stop doing all that stuff and you know and I'm having a far better time I'm the oldest river there right enough like 50 next year but I'm having I'm having a great time I'm having a wonderful wonderful life I'm not missing out on anything anything, nothing positive. There's nothing positive that's left in my life since I stopped

SPEAKER_01: 53:57

drinking. Gosh, Kirsty, thank you so much for sharing all that with us. Honestly, such a personal story, but also just lots of experience and hearing your life before and after alcohol as well. You know, I don't think anybody listening could think, nah, I would just stick where I am. Unless, of course, you know, you're not in a position to really... to change things yet if you're not there yet but if you are then there's lots of positivity lots of good things on the other end of not drinking and you're living proof of that and if you need support then I have no doubt whatsoever that you are the person to go to for that I feel like you're just made for this work I can feel it in your words you're so passionate about it it's incredible to hear

SPEAKER_00: 54:38

thank you so

SPEAKER_01: 54:39

thank you for coming on and sharing that with us today and of course you mentioned finding you on Instagram which is our favourite social media place to chat so I will link Kirstie's social media Sky Rose Coaching and Sober Bus in the show notes so you can just one click away from getting in touch or going to have a browse or hearing one of Kirstie's morning chats I'm rambling

SPEAKER_00: 55:00

the jellyfish woman listen I've been stung that many times I think I might be like spider man is like a jellyfish at some point Amanda I want to thank you as well because thank you once for the opportunity and also for your community I mean it's I sometimes do struggle with what am I going to post but I know I and always look to you for the inspiration and support.

SPEAKER_01: 55:20

Well, that's good to hear. Yeah, that's something I'm passionate about. Making social media easy, fun and profitable for small business owners. It doesn't have to be stressful. You can use it to just chat to your audience like you do, get really important messages out. I mean... a platform where small business owners are global. You know, we're no longer confined to the brick and mortar local store. Even if you do have a brick and mortar local store, you can still get out to the world. It's incredible. So having businesses like you as part of it is what makes it so. Thank you for being there. And thanks again for coming on today. Thank you. And I'll let you go on. Thank you. Thank you so much for joining us today for another episode of the Growth Addicts podcast. I hope today's episode has given you inspiration and tangible tips that you can use to Until next time.