Redefining Wisdom

Ep. 098 - Steph McFarland - Why Men Struggle to Feel (And How to Change It)

Daniel Cianci

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Steph McFarland is an English teacher with over 13 years of experience in the education field. She has a B.S. in English Education and an M.A. in Art Education, with a thesis that focuses on boys and men and how art can support them in their mental and emotional well-being. She has dedicated her research to interviewing men and boys and learned ways to cultivate safety for male vulnerability within relationships.

Most men don’t struggle with emotions because they don’t have them. They struggle because they were never taught how to feel them.

In this episode, we break down one of the most misunderstood truths about emotional intelligence, vulnerability, and why so many men feel disconnected from their inner world.

From childhood conditioning to societal expectations, we explore why sadness often turns into anger, why vulnerability feels unsafe, and how emotional suppression quietly shapes relationships, identity, and decision-making.

We also dive into:

  • The difference between vulnerability and trauma dumping
  • Why men are more emotionally expressive as babies, but lose it over time
  • How emotional intelligence actually works (beyond the buzzword)
  • The hidden role of the body in processing emotions
  • Why “thinking your way out” doesn’t work
  • How to start reconnecting with yourself, without overwhelming your nervous system
  • Plus much more


This isn’t about becoming more emotional. It’s about becoming more aware, honest, and free.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected, overwhelmed, or unable to express what’s really going on inside, this conversation will change how you see yourself.


Follow Stephanie:

  • Theads: https://www.threads.com/@mcstephiebee
  • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mcstephiebee/

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Website: https://www.redefiningwisdom.com/