Start2Finish: Fueling Discipline, Focus and the right mindset
Start2finish is about starting a journey towards achieving fulfilment and the guidance to travel through the voyage until reaching the shores of your goals and visions. The mission is reaching the finish line in whatever endeavours of your life. Many of us lose track of our goals or abandon ship due to situations surrounding us or we lose the will power to go on. Hence regularly reminding each other of what is at stake is key to keep us going
Start2Finish: Fueling Discipline, Focus and the right mindset
Transform Challenges into Success with Joseph Nkani. A story of resilience and determination.
Join us for an enlightening journey with with my brother Joseph Nkani in our debut interview episode, where we explore the profound transformation from a young boy in Bulawayo to a respected customer care and marketing consultant. Discover how Mukoma Joe’s early household responsibilities shaped his independence and life skills, setting the foundation for his successful career. As you listen, you'll gain insights into the principles of discipline, focus, and mindset that have driven his professional achievements and personal growth.
Throughout the episode, we delve into the crucial role of mentorship and lifelong learning in overcoming career obstacles. We discuss how aligning academic pursuits with personal passions can lead to a more fulfilling career path, challenging conventional education systems. He also shares invaluable advice on selecting the right mentor, understanding personal strengths, and harnessing them to reach one’s true potential. This conversation is a treasure trove of wisdom for anyone eager to redefine success and take control of their career and life journey.
In a heartfelt discussion on personal growth, Mukoma Joseph opens up about overcoming adversity in life’s many facets, including career setbacks and personal relationships. We explore the power of resilience and self-reflection, emphasizing the importance of taking ownership of one's actions. From navigating desert moments in marriage to extracting life lessons , his story is a testament to the strength found in community, faith, and self-reliance. Tune in to be inspired by my brother Joseph Nkani candid anecdotes and life lessons that are as applicable to personal development as they are to professional excellence.
Fueling Discipline , focus and the right mindset!
So welcome to Start, to Finish, Fueling Discipline, Focus and the Right Mindset. So today. So I would say this is our debut interview program. Of late it's just been, you know, just tips and we are giving people, but today I'm joined with Mgoma Jose Mkani. How are you, Mgoma?
Speaker 2:I'm very well. Thank you, and how are you? I'm doing very well. Thank you for the invitation.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So you are the first one. So, whether people are going to like it or not, well, it's all about what we're going to say today, but I'm sure they're going to enjoy the conversation because it's all about inspiring. You know, our community, sharing insights about the journey because, uh, this program is called start to finish. You know, fueling discipline, focus in the right mindset. I think those, uh, those three principles are very key, you know, to success in life, in business and in everything. So, yeah, it's about inspiration. So that's why we are here. So today we're just going to have a conversation. Dig into your life. You know the journey that you have been through up to this point. I know I've known you for more than a decade.
Speaker 2:Yes, it's been a journey, it's been a journey together. I know, know, yes, since our days in the corporate world correct. And of course, we have traveled many journeys, climbed mountains, swam across rivers, across the sea. Yes, yes, yeah, but yeah, it's been a while.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we've come a long way yeah, so, yeah, so you know, I mean it's been an interesting journey, because I was just looking back, because when you joined, I think we met at Ad Media. No, no, no, not Ad Media Advertising Industry.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, that's where we met in the sales department In the sales department.
Speaker 1:You were coming from MultiChoice at the time.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, Not directly from MultiChoice. Yes, Of course there were other stages of the journey.
Speaker 3:But by and large I was coming from the satellite services organization.
Speaker 1:So we did some selling and persuading people to buy advertising at that time. Some days were good, some days were tough. Yeah, well, that's the reality of life.
Speaker 2:You can't have it either way. You can't have it all the time, going through the good times and the bad times yeah life is in cycles.
Speaker 2:So what has been easy for you, like, for example, selling advertising or service, like I remember you went on to masker and things sort of like took off there yes, um, I've pretty much sold most of the services in life, but uh, yeah, I must point out that I haven't really done much time in the fast-moving consumer goods, as it way. Yeah, I've largely spent my time in the services sector so I've been selling services more than products.
Speaker 1:Perfect. Anyway, let's just jump into it. And who is Joseph Mkani? We want to learn from you who is he? Give us a piece and pieces. I know you are a Manchester United supporter correct?
Speaker 2:No, no, then cut the program.
Speaker 1:Cut the program, cut, cut. I'm just kidding. Well, I'm a Liverpool fan. Cut the program, cut, cut. I'm just kidding. Well, I'm a Liverpool fan, a big one, an addicted one, for that matter.
Speaker 2:You're quite right. You're quite right. Yeah but who is Joseph Mkani? You're looking at an individual who's born into a Bulawayo family and a family of boys only, and a family of boys only. And I'm the eldest from my mother's side, and with that of course, comes different experiences, expectations, aspirations and fears. So I'm born in a family that was based in Bulawayo some decades ago. I know I look younger than my actual age, Trust me, you do Getting younger every day.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know I look younger than my actual age. Trust me, you do Getting younger every day.
Speaker 2:Yes, so I grew up in Mpopoma, to be specific, and my education was done in Mpopoma. I'm a product of Mpopoma High School, which is the only high school in town, by the way, and I had a family of boys. I had a family of boys and of course that comes with its own dynamics of being the first in the household and you are exposed to the household chores.
Speaker 2:You do the cooking as well, you do the washing as well and you do the maintenance of the house under the instruction of your mother at the time, and you think she's bothering you, she's abusing you. But now fast forward. I now appreciate that I can cook. I can do some things. I can't be stranded when I'm alone at home.
Speaker 2:I can't sleep on an empty stomach. I'll still find something to do and prepare a meal for myself A good meal, for that matter. Then, after my school, I decided to go into the marketing space. So I then started marketing through the Institute of Marketing Management, a South African examination body, and then I pursued marketing in career and I'm in a career in marketing. And then of course, that comes in with a bit of selling, a bit of marketing, a bit of PR, and over the years, yes, I've basically sold services and I've interacted with all kinds of clients, the good, the bad, the ugly, the pleasant, and at various levels. So, yeah, I think I've gone through the mill, I've traded the punches in the industry and, leading up to now where I am into management consultancy, I do management consultancy services for sales, advertising, marketing and PR. I'm now selling my knowledge.
Speaker 1:You're now selling your knowledge.
Speaker 2:I'm selling my experience and I'm feeding off that because I spend my time in the trades Okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I am Perfect. Yes, so you are now selling off your skills. What is it exactly that you are selling like as a consultant?
Speaker 2:Okay, I help brands grow. Okay, I help brands move from one place to another. Brands grow, I help brands move from one place to another, be it your marketing strategy, be it your business strategy, be it your sales strategy, be it your market analysis, be it your market research. So, basically, I come in and help you take your brand to the next level from a marketing and PR perspective. So I come in and analyze and review and then share with you a few ideas, a few tips of what to do and what not to do to take your brand to the next level. So that's what I do. I'm very practical in my approaches. I always want to take my clients through a practical journey, not an academic journey. So when I come through to you, I don't really open any textbook, but we discuss what is on the ground what is the reality and what are the dynamics at play, what are the forces at play, what do we need to avoid, what do we need to capitalize on?
Speaker 2:and then we move on. Like that, yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think you just brought up a very important point. You know about understanding your market and being hands-on. Most people I think we are going with what we call, is it secondary research, whereby we just catch it from the top. We don't really get deeper to learn about the industry because we miss the practicality. Yes, because it's constantly changing the market.
Speaker 2:True, true that. And then the textbook would have printed their last edition, 5, 10, 15 years ago. Yes, and you're still holding on to those principles and practices that are stated in that particular textbook. And yet you miss out on the current dynamics, and more so in our context as Zimbabwe Remember Zimbabwe is a different ballgame altogether. It's a different animal you know the same principle that you read in a textbook and you think it worked in South Africa, it may not work in Zimbabwe. It may not work in Zambia.
Speaker 2:So those are the things that we then look into from a practical perspective and we help the different brands move to the next level, Because over the years we have gathered and learned that experience is your best teacher. You learn the hard way in some cases and at times, yes, you learn through advice, through guidance, or you may learn through an example of another person across the road.
Speaker 2:But basically you look at what is happening around you Because I also learned over the years that some of the problems we face, be it even at individual level, at family level, or even at corporate level, is we want to look for complex solutions? To our simple problems instead of making it easy one of my favorite statements is keep the basics simple, and then you see what happens.
Speaker 1:Perfect you know, that's the same language also, I think I've also been trying to share. Just simplify it, just keep it simple and it will make it, it will work it out on its own, because if you just want to complicate it, because you know we're thinking of these grand business ideas and you're scratching your head. When you see it, it makes sense, it makes you smile, you know whenever you're sleeping at night.
Speaker 2:But when you wake up, in reality, you know it's not tangible, it's not even working, it's not even producing your desired results. So let's simplify our lives, let's simplify even working. It's not even producing your desired results, yes, so let's simplify our lives, let's simplify our processes, let's simplify our thinking, and there's a saying which goes simplicity is the new sophistication.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, you've just completed it, and you mentioned something about something you know when we maintain the old knowledge, it's as if we are referring to something that has already expired. Where I'm coming from is when someone goes to university, you know, the world is moving at a very faster pace, whereby, by the time they finish their degree, or the information that they have acquired, it's useless. Yes, you know, yes, the it's not relevant. You have got a marketing degree, but it may not really be relevant on what's going on on the ground.
Speaker 2:yes, yes um, there is a big difference between education and knowledge okay, break it down for us. When you are saying I'm educated, it means I've gone through the modules, I've gone through the course. I set an exam and I achieved a certain threshold of marks, which then warranted me to be given a piece of paper that I will hang behind my wall.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:You are educated.
Speaker 2:Well done and we clap hands for you. And then there is a dimension where we say this area now needs knowledge. You need to be knowledgeable, you need to exhibit an appreciation of what goes on, how things work, what time it is, what season it is and what is needed, and that's knowledge. So knowledge then becomes in my view, goes beyond and will be more important. If I may paint you a scenario, let's look at someone who studies motor mechanics and they've gone through the entire apprenticeship program and they have their graduation and we pour oil on them and we're celebrating them. They've graduated. But give them a vehicle and it has a problem. It has to be fixed.
Speaker 3:They may fix it properly.
Speaker 2:They may fail to fix it or they may fix it properly. Yeah, they may fail to fix it correct or they may fix it properly, but then it's not for the long term. It was a shorty job. It has to come back again the following two, three days for for another recheck. But then you have someone who then has a general aptitude of cars. Yeah, he would learn by watching a qualified mechanic.
Speaker 1:Mechanic correct.
Speaker 2:They gather the knowledge over the years by watching a qualified person do the thing and that mechanic, that learner, will be a first learner and they catch up quickly the principles, the dynamics of how an engine works and how different parts influence each other, and they master the motor vehicle. The next motor vehicle is brought in into the workshop and that person is given the assignment to look into that vehicle. They'll do an equal job. So now we have an educated mechanic, we have a knowledgeable mechanic.
Speaker 3:Wow.
Speaker 2:That's deep man. So the knowledgeable mechanic will equally do the same job and produce the same outcomes. But the world system tells us he doesn't have a certificate. Yeah, but he has the knowledge.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So those are then the discussions or the dynamics we find in the streets, in the marketplace to say are you qualified, Are you certified, Are you knowledgeable? So what would you rather?
Speaker 3:have. That's quite interesting.
Speaker 1:What you have just said. I remember we had a truck for our workplace that we use for our business errands. It was giving so much problems, you know, eating too much fuel, and it was a very small problem. But we, you know, we had this long time mechanic that we were using that time and you know they kept touching different plants and they couldn't really figure it out. So I was then referred no, why don't you try this other guy? I think he's really good, you might just like him. I said, cool, let me try him out. And you know I remember trying him out the first time. He said okay, bring the car, start it, do this, do that. He said this is actually a fuel pump.
Speaker 1:That's why your car is having problems, you know it's not pulling the way you want, it's just fuel pump. And guess what? We had spent so much more money. We only had to squint I think about 20 bucks for the fuel pump, Fixed it in Boom and we were going.
Speaker 2:I think we so that's a knowledge dimension Knowledge dimension. That's a knowledge dimension, yes, because that person has gone beyond the academic dimension, the certificate dimension. But Because that person has gone beyond the academic dimension, the certificate dimension, but his skill, his knowledge is what set him apart, which of course speaks to what we are discussing today starting to finish living life with the end in mind, correct, producing results, producing outcomes, solving life's problems. That's our mandate, yeah that's very true.
Speaker 1:At the end of the day, that's what we want it's all about because, for progress to happen, I think it comes back to learning. What are you learning every single day? If you are not learning something that moves you forward, you are still learning, but you are learning something that continues to deteriorate your, your progress is a human being, so, yes, you know I I've been uh like, uh, I think late last year, you know, I just started asking myself so many questions which I've never asked myself before.
Speaker 1:you know where I am in life and I was looking at the next 10 years, where I want to get to. I just started learning, I just started going on internet, youtube, just picking up and just building my knowledge base, because I think I'm one of the person when we left the school days, you did a course and that was it.
Speaker 1:Not really giving yourself time to learning, spending too much time on social media doing nothing and adding value to nothing. So I've really found that development, that knowledge gap that we have. You know from school to where you are, you see, you are not excelling or you are not being promoted at work. It comes back to that gap.
Speaker 1:You know what are you doing, and I've seen guys going from first degree, second degree master's and I'm still at the same position. I'm wondering this guy is moving and the moment you move on your education again, you also upgrade in terms of, most probably, your lifestyle and your work potentials, that kind of thing. So yeah, yeah, yeah, I really find it interesting.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I hear you, and you have actually brought in another element which I think strongly for that matter, we should look into to say how do we define our career paths, how do we define our academic journeys, what do we strive for at the end of the day? Because I've seen over the years that out there we do have people that have taken up studies that may not have been in line or in sync with their expertise, their passion and their desires.
Speaker 2:At the end of the day, you get someone who then graduates from school and they pass on the certificates to their parents and say, okay, you guys wanted me to get this degree.
Speaker 1:Here is your degree. Here is your degree. I've done it.
Speaker 3:I'm now pursuing my career.
Speaker 2:I'm now pursuing my passion. So I think those are serious conversations that I think we should start having amongst ourselves to say what really do we want to do and what really adds value to our lives and is our curricula in line with what we want to achieve as a people, as individuals, as family and even as households? And then, yeah, I think we can help ourselves, because you also want to understand that even historically and politically, the education system in our context in Zimbabwe was designed to make sure it produces an employee.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that's very true, not an entrepreneur, not someone who can be in their own space, who cannot go up even the corporate ladder. But it was just a political dispensation at the time. Of course we need to understand that. But what I'm trying to say is that we need again to review the national conversation, review the global conversation, to say what are the dynamics at play, what influences certain narratives in the way we live our lives. Is the conversation promoting my personal interest as an individual.
Speaker 2:Is the national conversation promoting our aspirations as a family, as a household and even as a people. So, yeah, we can then learn a lot of things from there, and then we can begin to guide even our children as they grow, identify their talents, identify their strengths, and then we navigate and promote them in their, in their journey, so that they achieve what they are destined to be in life yeah, which which brings me to something else, uh, which is called mentorship.
Speaker 1:You know, I don't know what's your take on it, but I think mentorship is one of the most important things. I think, from childhood growing up, that someone needs, you know, and our school system doesn't have that structure. You realize, international universities, universities there's a mentor you're giving someone who you can go and talk to if you want. There's always that platform.
Speaker 1:You know yes and I see that gap. You know we lose a lot of time doing it yourself, making a lot of mistakes, learning from them. I look at myself. There are certain things that I'm like. You know what maybe, business-wise, I could have achieved if only I had a mentor.
Speaker 2:Yes, agreed yeah.
Speaker 1:I don't know what's your take on mentorship and its role, maybe to the future generation as well.
Speaker 2:Mentorship is a very key function that we need to activate and look into closely, function that we need to activate and look into closely, but before we do, we also want to ask ourselves a number of questions. For instance, an example we say how do? I select a mentor and if I want to mentor people below me or behind me, what are the dynamics at play? What do we look into? Because it's one thing being inspired by someone and you think you want to be like them and then you approach them and you're asking them to mentor you but the
Speaker 2:question is what motivated you to like who they are as an individual? Because there are many risks that are involved when you come into mentor matching. As an example, you could like someone who is flamboyant they are flashing their cash around town and you think I want to be like them. Let me approach them for them to mentor me. But then you don't realize that your own journey as an individual is not in that line. You are probably aligned to be in the back spaces, not in the public spaces, but we are asking someone who is a flamboyant individual, who's flaunting his wealth and his money in town, in the streets, someone who says I want to be seen, to be seen, yeah. And yet your own journey is meant to be behind the scenes, but influencing the world dynamics and being someone of influence in the community. So we want to look into that as well and say how do you choose a mentor? How do you choose someone who should mentor you?
Speaker 2:What are the issues that you look at? And if someone were to approach me today and say, joe, can I ask you to be my mentor? I'll ask them a few questions why me? Why did you choose me? And we then look at issues of? What are your fears? What are your aspirations? Do you even know yourself as an individual?
Speaker 2:I always train and teach about self-awareness to say, you also need to be aware of yourself as an individual, your environment, your relationship and even your journey, and then we can assist each other. So, yes, I strongly believe in the concept of mentorship and I think it's very important. We should pick it up, we should pursue it and we should always push for it. But let's identify what are the key elements that lead to mentor matching.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Because, also, I think, maybe from my end, I'm looking at the perspective of, uh, you know, the church playing a role, even your own family, you know, just playing that role, really setting the right foundation. Because I mean for someone to get to that place which you're talking about, where they'll start asking certain questions when they meet someone. Or they'll see someone say I want to be, you know, it's about where we are coming from, you see, when kids are growing. Or they'll see someone say I want to be, you know, it's about where we are coming from. You see, when kids are growing up, they need a certain guidance. If they don't get it, they will look for it somewhere else.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:You see, so that bridge, I think, becomes very important, and I remember at one point at the church that I used to go to, you know, we, you know there was those like business meetings where you're guided or you're learning some knowledge, at least you're getting the foundation.
Speaker 1:If you then want to feather it into reading books and doing other things, at least that platform is there. I find that to be more important to have just to be shaping someone, to then eventually get to that place where they accomplish. Because, you see, the journey has its ups and downs, has its challenges. Sometimes you think of giving up and I know I've given up so many times, you know then only to realize later on, hey, why did I do it? I should have just pushed through that. But now, with the knowledge that I have, now, you know, I'm like, you know, whatever comes to me, as you have said, you know you have to swim with the sharks and go up the rivers and whatever you, you know, swim up river because you know you now have certain knowledge, you now have certain understanding, which I think is quite key.
Speaker 1:Now, the next thing that I want to ask is, in this journey, uh, of life, I think from the time that I've known you, you know I, I know your first challenges, you know real life challenges and, uh, you know what are those? Some of those challenges that you're first, and how did you handle them, because you know the people that we're talking about and I believe we want to encourage each other with. I'm sure they're going through personal challenges, money challenges, which is, I think, one of the biggest ones, especially right now with the way things are in the economy. You know the money issue is a big one, but at the end of the day, when we face them, what do we do and what inspiration do we need to just continue pushing and wait for the outcome? At the end of the day?
Speaker 2:Okay, yes, look, I've walked the full steps of life at various stages of my life, from teenage being a young adult, a family man and a corporate world player. All those journeys have come with their ups and downs. Of course I've celebrated here and there. I've cried here and there. If you look at my journey, I think I've celebrated here and there. I've cried here and there. If you look at my journey, I think I've seen it all. Yeah, but in all that I've also learned a number of lessons which I can share and tell anyone and inspire someone. For starters, even academically, I wasn't as gifted as people want to see me like, because now what people are seeing is an end product.
Speaker 1:You sound very knowledgeable and very intelligent. That's streetwise.
Speaker 2:But I wouldn't lay a claim that I'm one of the academically gifted individuals in town, because I struggled with my classes, mind you.
Speaker 1:Me too.
Speaker 2:Actually, I was in the C classes growing up, so I wasn't your A student kind of a person, so I would take classes, I would repeat classes. But in all that you realize that you are kept pushing by your parents or by the system around you. You are kept pushing by your parents or by the system around you. You are kept pushed to persevere, to keep pushing until you get there. And that has been my academic journey. I'm not an A student, but of course I've hoped my way along the way up to where I am today. And then, if you look at even my career, I've lost jobs. I've gone through different seasons in a work setting where at times you get suspended, at times you then get reinstated, at times you are dismissed, at times you are told we no longer need you.
Speaker 2:All those phases I've gone through. And then, even from a social life standpoint, I've gone through sour relationships, which even included divorce. I've gone through a divorce in my lifetime, which is something that really devastated me and took a toll on me from social circles, and that was when I was within my mid-30s yeah, just shortly before 40, yeah, I went through that difficult time in my life and it changes your whole perception of life and it teaches you rough, real lessons in life. And then, when all is said and done, you look back and you say, okay, fine, what did I do wrong, what did I do right, what could I have avoided? And then you begin to tick the boxes and learn your lessons and you move on. So, yeah, basically, yeah, I've gone through all the ups and downs, be it career-wise, social life, even academically. Yeah, but here I am. The point is, I didn't give up, I learned my lessons and I've used those lessons to elevate myself to the next level. And in all that, one of the key things that I've learned is I don't regret.
Speaker 2:Don't regret If you go through a rough patch and you pay the price for your wrong decision or for your wrong action. Don't regret, but rather learn from the experience. Okay, sit back, relax and do an audit and ask yourself real hard, serious, honest questions. And from the honest answers that you give yourself, you realize that you pick up a few lessons which can elevate you to the next stage.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think, like what you said, real hard, honest questions. Sometimes we are not honest with ourselves. Yes, we don't take that time to really zero down in saying okay on my part, I think we are more wanting to blame someone else for my situation. Agreed, agreed, yes, that I think we are more wanting to blame someone else for my situation, agreed, agreed.
Speaker 2:Yes, that's one thing that I've also learned Take ownership, ownership, yeah, don't blame the next person, even if you are an aggrieved party in a situation. You are the aggrieved party. You are the one who's been disadvantaged. You are the one who's been deprived. Don't blame the next person look inward and say, okay, fine, what did I do wrong to allow this situation to happen to me?
Speaker 2:and then you take ownership so don't blame anyone, don't regret, take ownership, and then you find that you end up being a better person yeah, no, because in life I think ownership is one of the most important.
Speaker 1:Just like you know you, you grow up in a broken family or something bad may have happened to you growing up and you know, I think, taking ownership, or just knowing look, it happened to me. There's nothing you can do about it. But what you, the power that you have, is to do, is to take that ownership and start from where you are, because the moment you keep saying they did this to me, they did that to me, you live your whole life Miserable and counting the losses and miss the benefits.
Speaker 2:The other thing that I think is the main reason for that position is people always want to look at things from an outward perspective and say what will people say, what will people do? No, no.
Speaker 1:It's all about introspection.
Speaker 2:It's all about yourself, you know. Find inner strength to pick yourself up and then you move on and elevate yourself and get to the next level. Because I'll tell you what? People will always say something, whether it's the good, the bad, the ugly, whatever you do, there's always going to be a divided opinion. You do well in life, someone will clap hands for you. You do well in life, someone will have a thumbs down for you. Yes, so then who do you listen to? Ignore the voices, listen to your voice.
Speaker 2:And then you go put blinkers and walk ahead and walk on, so Listen to your voice. And then you go put blinkers and walk ahead and walk on.
Speaker 1:Wow. So that quiet time is necessary, where you go through those introspection and give yourself the power. Don't give someone else the power because you are in control at the end of the day. I like this term. We say I'm the master of my destiny, the captain of my fate. I drive that ship in any direction. So if I'm going to hit the destiny, the captain of my faith, I drive that ship in any direction. So if I'm going to hit the wall, it's on me.
Speaker 2:It's not on anyone else.
Speaker 1:It's not my parents, because they abused me. It's not on anyone else because they said the wrong word to me. It's on me. So I think it's about taking that ownership. Another thing that I want to ask is were you ever dismissed from work? Do you have a certain scenario where you were saying thank you, but your services are no longer required?
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, I do, I do. Yeah, I remember, I remember, yeah, this one organization where where some of my personal problems at home encroached into my workspace and then, of course, one thing led to another in the conversation with the HR I was a sales manager at the time and then, of course, I remember the conversation with my HR manager at the time where we had a mutual agreement of what was happening on the ground was beginning to affect my workmates, because the situation from home had actually infiltrated my workspace and the workspace was getting contaminated because of my personal problems at home.
Speaker 2:And then that conversation then looked at various options and in the end we then agreed that my stay in that particular organization was no longer tenable. And then I was asked to leave. So I didn't leave that organization at my own will or on my own volition, but I was forced out Because I still believed I still had something to offer to that organization. But one thing yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My my well was poisoned and then I lost my job yes yeah, in the process so now marriage is on the rocks.
Speaker 1:You lost your job. What happened next?
Speaker 2:Right. What happens next is you? Of course you cry. You go through a season of crying and counting the loss and pondering what the future holds and saying, oh, this is the end of me, I'm done. Yeah, yeah. But I will be the first one to say I never contemplated suicide. Yeah, that was beyond me. Yeah, yeah, I had this fire and flame in me that still believed that I still had a chance to life, I still could pick myself up. But what I did was I said to myself, still could pick myself up.
Speaker 3:But what?
Speaker 2:I did was I said to myself. I reflected on a story in the life where Jesus spent time in the desert. Right To say, I mean John, life in the desert. To say there are times when you want to get away from the crowd. Right, the crowd is there and everything's happening. The marketplace is there, people are having conversations and trading and their lives are happening. And here you are, you are bleeding and you are the only one. And, by the way, that drama happened while I was in Harare and the cluster of my family is in Bulawake.
Speaker 3:It's in Bulawake.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So here I am, alone in Narare, and I'm saying, okay, what do I need to do here? So I then say to myself let me pull myself out from the marketplace, from the conversation in the streets, and rediscover myself, recalibrate my thinking, restructure my way. And then I called it at the time, I called it the desert moments and I deliberately decided to be away from the public spaces.
Speaker 2:But, one thing one place that I didn't leave was the church. Yeah, one place that I didn't leave was the church. And I told myself I'm not even going to change the church Because this church knows my story. So now do I get away from that church and go and fellowship elsewhere with people who don't know my story? And I said, no, I'm not going to do that. I'll still maintain going to the same church and I'll still maintain my regular presence within the church, but what I stood down from was serving. I stopped from serving the church. I spoke to my department leader and said okay, I just need time to myself. Please allow me to stand down from my duties at church. I'll come to church Every Sunday, you'll find me, but I'm not going to be actively involved in serving in the department that I was serving at the time.
Speaker 2:But I was aloof from the rest of the world. But when I go to church, my life is normal, I fellowship and I have a good time. But of course I could miss the activities that I used to enjoy, like, as an example, here is a single guy or here is a divorcee not a single, here is a divorcee. And you are hearing that there is a couples event happening and you're sitting there and wondering, yeah, I should be part of that trip, I should be part of that seminar, I should be part of that meeting. But here I am, broken, bruised and down, but I'm re-energizing myself to pick myself up and move on with the rest of the pack. But, of course, with the grace of God and my attitude, my view to life and my inner strength, I rebound and started on a new relationship, which I'm still in at the moment, and happily so. And it's like when we got together I told myself that, okay, I'm in this relationship, I've got areas to cover.
Speaker 3:I'm in a relationship in a debt of a relationship.
Speaker 2:So I need to cover up the lost time and make up for the lost time. And now I'm in a happy marriage and all is fine, working well and living the life.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's good.
Speaker 2:That's awesome man.
Speaker 1:You know, I think, from what you're saying, what I'm hearing is you know, when you're in a good place, when things are happening, when you're on top of the mountain, it's important to prepare yourself. You know, prepare the mind, learn as much as you can belong to a church or a community that will be available. At that time the family wasn't there, but the church became sort of like a pillar. And when you're now going through those situations, there's always that voice that tells you it's going to be fine and, because of a certain knowledge that you have learned, you're going to the word of God. You call them the desert moment. Yes, because you read the scripture. Then you resonate and say you know what, whatever I'm going through, I'm in a desert here.
Speaker 1:Yes, you know, yes, but at the end of the day, maybe I'll be like who was that? Who dug a well in the dry season? Is it Isaac, the son of Abraham? He dug a well like it was desert.
Speaker 2:It was dry, you know and, speaking of which, when I said I was in a desert moment, my family, of course. The family will always be there for you, but I dismissed them yeah, I want to put that on record. It's not like they were not there for me when I needed them.
Speaker 2:I actually dismissed them and I said guys, I'm going to handle this thing alone and my way. I'm trying to highlight the fact that I took ownership of my mess. I took ownership of my problems and I said I'm going to solve them on my own. And I shout out my family and said guys, just stay out of the ring. I'm going to box this match alone. Just provide me your prayers, cover me in your prayers and just give me moral support, but don't be engaged in the fight. And I appreciate the family also gave me that kind of support. But I said I'm going to do this on my own and on my terms.
Speaker 2:Because I wanted to paint a situation where, even in future, my family members will not be blamed for anything or be accused for influencing me. So that's why I then said I'm going to manage my divorce situation from my own perspective and on my terms.
Speaker 2:And then I initiated the divorce and then the family was kept away from that, for the simple reason that I didn't want my family to be blamed. I didn't want my family to be accused of influencing me, so I took ownership. So the point is, I took ownership of my situation and I set the rules and I applied the strategy on my terms.
Speaker 1:Okay, so what advice would you give for young couples? What is it that will make people stay together and to avoid divorce? Obviously, Obviously, it's a painful thing because you have invested your time. There are children involved, but when this thing happens, you know it disrupts a lot of things in one's life.
Speaker 2:Yes, I think one problem or one myth that people have out there is that marriage is glamorous, marriage is rosy, and it's not. And the second thing that people always make a mistake of is to expect your partner to be like you. There's nothing like that, because you are dealing with two different individuals who have two different backgrounds and different upbringing, different aspirations, but here you are two different people trying to live one life. So definitely, definitely, and by nature's design, you are bringing two people with different ideologies, different ideas and different approaches to try and live the same life.
Speaker 2:But what I then always tell people, which I'm also telling people now, is don't spend time looking at the differences your differences with your spouse, but rather celebrate the similarities. That's number one and number two. You also need to be careful and strategic on how you handle your differences, because you're not always going to argue all the time. So remember what I'm saying you are dealing with different characters trying to live together. You are two different adults trying to live together and you are going to have different views to certain situations. But then how do you navigate that terrain? Okay, acknowledge your differences and accommodate each other's differences, and then you realize that some of the problems can be eradicated.
Speaker 2:So celebrate your similarities and accept your differences. I'll give you an example. Like now with my wife, virginia. I've noticed what she does well and better than me, and there are areas which I do better than her. So we have then come to a position of understanding those differences and our strengths and weaknesses. So she now leads the house in the areas of her strength. I lead the house in the areas of my strength. As an example, virginia is more prayerful than me. Virginia is more disciplined financially than me.
Speaker 3:Okay, that's the same in the house.
Speaker 1:My wife makes sure everything is in its proper place, but on my side, virginia is more structured than me.
Speaker 2:I'm liberal, I'm open minded.
Speaker 3:I'm wide, my horizon is wide, his is narrowed, focused, timed and strategic.
Speaker 2:so you then find we have a situation where all financial matters are dealt by my wife, and I'm actually happier that way. You know why? Because when I do the shopping, I don't look at the prices. When I do the shopping, I don't look at the quality.
Speaker 1:You and I are like the same when.
Speaker 2:I do the shopping. I want to get into a shop and get out in the next two minutes.
Speaker 2:So, she's more meticulous than me and she's more financially astute than me. So what I'm saying here is that allow your spouse to express themselves in their areas of strength and then you do your bit. And well, the other thing, the other reason in our case is that I don't want to be asked where the change is. You know, when I go shopping, I'm spending the money. Please don't ask me. Don't ask me to account for the money.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Because I'm one careless spender. You know, I remember many a times I would, if I had the money in my pocket. I'm a football person. I would spontaneously buy a Liverpool jersey.
Speaker 3:Yeah, off budget.
Speaker 2:And have to explain myself at home. So I'm a free spender and she's not like that. She's structured, she's organized, she's strategic. So those are differences that I'm talking about. To say, identify your strengths and weaknesses as a couple and then allow each other to operate in their areas of strength, then you have no problems, you have minimized the problems and you live happily thereafter.
Speaker 1:You live ever after you know that sounds amazing, you know, because like that journey of divorce definitely is divorce, definitely should be a go area.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, Of course. I would encourage people to avoid that space. It's a difficult space to be in. Once you are in there, please make sure you pick yourself up, find inner strength, stand up and walk on again. Yeah, true.
Speaker 1:Where does friendship come in, you know, in bettering the marriage? Uh, you know, because I, I've seen it's okay, you've got people who have been maybe dating, who started off with friends and it built up into a marriage. Then, you know, I think most times, you know, you see a beautiful girl or you're inspired somehow to say, hey, what's up? You know, you get into the marriage, then a lot of things that's popping up, that uh it then you know, cause a lot of problems. I think for most I'm just trying to figure out where does that? Because now I see you, you know, whenever I go on the FB they're all smiles they're all joy, they're all these things.
Speaker 1:How do you develop then that friendship that keeps you rooted? And you know you mentioned the issue of dissolving like fight. You are communicating with one another. Where is that draw?
Speaker 2:Alright, okay, our model in my setting, in my marriage, is that we have identified the different dimensions of our relationship. Of course, firstly, you pointed out we are friends. Yeah, me and Virginia are friends. Before we even talk of the marriage elements, we are friends. And me and Virginia are friends. Before we even talk of the marriage elements, we, we are friends. And then, of course, you, we, we escalated to a marriage. But when you talk about your spouse being your friend, you are looking at a situation where you, you, you, you simplify issues. We talk, we spoke about being complicated. Simplify issues when you have a conversation with your spouse. Don't always be serious, you know. Allow yourselves to talk nonsense guys Talk nonsense, talk nonsense.
Speaker 2:Say what you want and don't audit your partner and say come on, you are an adult, how can you think like that?
Speaker 3:No no.
Speaker 2:Be as childish as you can. You know, in your own spaces. In your own spaces, fool around, you know, like of course, I know this is a public podium, I mean this is a public space.
Speaker 2:You know I call you names and those names are silly names, you know. But I say I tell Uriwangu, you know, Given well, just by way of selecting my words, I would say Uribenzirangu, you know, and there's no offense in that, it's the spirit that the word is being used, you know, that shows to say I'm breaking barriers between you and me. Yes, life is not too, too serious as we want to make it. So we, we, we are free amongst each other, we are friends and literally, in our context, right now and I'm speaking it even on record I don't have a friend, a male friend, who you can identify and say if Joe is not at home, if Joe is not at work, he's at this guy's home?
Speaker 2:I don't have that. I have Virginia as my friend, so most of the chances are, where I am is Virginia. So we are separated by work. Is she supporting Liverpool? Yes, we are separated by work and we are separated by work. We are separated by work and we are separated by other aspirations, like in my case when I'm in my football spaces. I can go to a stadium alone, but at the end of the day she becomes my first point of recoiling and restarting, and similarly so, either she's at work, she's with her colleagues in the industry or we are together. But having said that, I'm not saying you should always be with your partner 24-7.
Speaker 3:That's not real.
Speaker 2:That's a fake life. Yeah, Allow each other spaces. You know. There are spaces where you can go alone. Yeah, there are spaces where you can go alone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there are spaces where you are saying I know, girl, I'm going alone on this one, you are not welcome. You know, let's be real, life is real. Yeah, but at the end of the day I'm saying she is my friend, yeah, yeah. So find a spot of friendship with your spouse and then you enjoy each other. Find a spot of friendship with your spouse and then you enjoy each other.
Speaker 1:Lovely. Okay let's go back to family. You know I saw that you were celebrating the old man's birthday quite recently. You know how important is family to you Family for me, family is number one.
Speaker 2:That's a rule, it's in the Constitution and it's not up for debate. When they say family men, I think they mention my name. I strongly believe in the unit of the family and when we talk about family, we are saying we are looking at your parents, we are looking at your spouse, you are looking at your children, you are looking at your extended. We are looking at your spouse, you are looking at your children and you are looking at your extended family. You know your, your in-laws.
Speaker 2:I always call I call them the outlaws, so so you are including that constituency in your network and for me, everything I do, everything I say, points to that constituency, those people, anything else. I remember when I was telling some colleagues at work, when we are leaving work I always joke and say guys, I'm now going to people who matter more than you, guys. So, you can't delay me from leaving.
Speaker 3:I'm going to people who matter more than you, my workmate. As a workmate. You don't matter to me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's on record and I don't withdraw that statement you are my, but people who matter most to me is my, my family, and I would expect people even to have that kind of perception and attitude.
Speaker 1:Uh, yeah, treasure your family yes, yeah, anything else, you spend a lot of time with them. Yes, I know you visit the old men very regularly. How often do you? Because, most people.
Speaker 2:He's passed on now, but my mother is still there in Blahwayo and, of course, a couple of months will be a long time before I visit here. I also have Mama here in Narare my mother-in-law, but we call her my mother. She's here, she's just a few kilometers away and even as we speak right now, she's actually visiting with us. So family is quite important and I treasure that and I cannot trade them for anything else.
Speaker 1:And how, the lessons that you learned as a child from your mother and your father, how have they really shaped you now as a man? Because you know the reason why I'm asking um, as parents, sometimes we, you know, we, we, we are too loose with our kids you know, we love them too much. We don't want to beat them, we don't want to correct them, but I know, growing up, you know it was a different thing altogether, but in that, as I look back as well, especially for for myself.
Speaker 1:I remember every time we finished school we were posted in the rural areas. Yes, you know, there was always something to do, you know, and I remember that time would separate us from our friends in town and we would spend a lot of time in the rural areas working hard and all sorts of things were going on. When you come back to town, you only come back maybe three days before school opens and then you're posted to the boarding school. That was our lives and, looking back at that, it really shaped me to who I am. I use my hands a lot and there's nothing that I can tell myself, I can't do. There's a certain level of just keep going, it will work out. It's where when things are tough.
Speaker 2:Agreed, agreed Three life lessons that I've learned from my parents. My mom taught us to be to manage ourselves when we're in the home. I know I can cook and she even taught me baking. I can bake you a scone, maybe. She taught me how to cook. She taught me how to do my laundry and she taught me how to do even the ironing. So my mother taught me key household skills that I can do.
Speaker 2:And then from my father, the three life lessons, and may he so rest in peace. He taught me one principle where he said don't be a bother. His message was don't bother people around you, and by that he meant to say don't be a burden on people around you. Make sure you sustain yourself, make sure you run your own lives without being a bother to the next person. Of course we know in real life there are times when I need to come and ask for assistance from you, kuda, and say, oh, kuda, please can you assist me with this? But my default lesson from my father was don't be a bother, don't ask anything from the next person. Sustain yourself, accept what you don't have. If you don't have a car, don't bother the person who's got a car. Of course, there are times when you may need a ride, but his message was to say teach yourself to live without a vehicle, teach yourself to walk.
Speaker 1:Until you can afford it.
Speaker 2:Yes, until you have your own means of doing life. And then the second thing that I remember vividly I've been up to now is our dad taught us timekeeping. Okay, my dad would never get late. He would never get late for any appointment.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 2:And I guess it had to do with his occupation. So even up to now I respect time like no one else. Wow, if you tell me it's 10 o'clock, I'll make sure I'm there by 10. I'm one person who actually falls sick if I run late for a certain, for an event or for something else. Yeah, if church starts at 9,. If church starts at 9, if I get there it could have passed 9, I feel sick. I don't enjoy the service anymore.
Speaker 3:I've already disconnected.
Speaker 2:I've already told myself no, no, this is not right. If I have a meeting with you, I make sure I'm there on time. So, in terms of timekeeping. Please, if you have to deal with me, please respect time, and that's a lesson that I learned for free from my late father Awesome.
Speaker 1:As we come to a close, let's talk customer care. Is it a calling? I know you're doing a lot of work teaching people customer care and over the years, especially in our economy, because of the changes that has been going on, I think we no longer have the customer that has been going on. You know, I think we, we no longer have the customer care you know someone buys from you, you don't treat them well.
Speaker 1:You are not smiling. It's as if you know I, I, I owe you, when you're supposed to be the one who owes me. Yes, yeah, that caters.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah yeah, sadly, sadly, we are now living, living in a world that has accepted mediocrity, that has accepted being shortchanged as the norm. But well, to answer your question in full context is yeah, I've been in the sales and marketing and PR space for so long, for so many decades, and I now do management training, corporate training rather, for organizations where we talk, among other things, issues to do with customer service excellence, and you realize that we have dropped the standards for service providers and, more painfully, even the customers themselves. They've lowered their expectations and, at the end of the day, we begin to live in an environment where customer service excellence is now compromised.
Speaker 2:So I'm here, I'm training and telling people from a space of knowledge from a space of experience, from a space of desire to shape people's minds, to say how do we improve on customer service? For me, it's not really about the product that we are selling. It's about the soft skills that people have that can enhance a customer's experience, that they won't forget about us as a brand. They won't forget about us as a service provider. They'll always think about us. They'll always want to do business with us. So I now train people on the soft skills of customer service. You know, skills like your attitude, skills like your emotional intelligence, skills like how you relate with people, your interpersonal skills. All that is part of a package that people should have and apply in their lives. At the end of the day, we live in a better place in terms of customer service. So it's a conversation that is at the heart of my career. It's something that I push with a passion to say guys, we can do better. Our customers deserve better.
Speaker 2:And remember in one minute. You are a service provider.
Speaker 1:The next minute. You are a client.
Speaker 3:So the wheels turn.
Speaker 2:So it comes also from a space of as an individual. I'm a people's person. I enjoy relating with people, I enjoy dealing with people. So for me it's not work, it's a lifestyle. I know how to handle people. It's a passion. I value people. As such, I find myself at home when we are talking about relationships with people at different levels, be it in the corporate world, be it in the streets and be it in social circles. For me, it's my home turf, it's your home turf and um over time.
Speaker 1:You know there's this concept that I I picked up. It's called skill stacking. I think back in the day we used to have if someone is an engineer, they are known as an engineer. You know, you always have those soft skills and the hard skills and as people I think we had tendencies of not really adding on different skills on top of each other. I remember, at one point you were doing videography.
Speaker 3:You are not doing it now but it's a skill that you picked up at some point, I think around that time also, as you can see, I did the same thing. I'm happy I inspired you. You inspired me, yeah.
Speaker 1:But which key skills have you learned over the years to this point that has really enhanced your career and your journey through life?
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, fine, there is one dimension of the skills, for example, the soft skills. This speaks of your ability to deal with people, correct your communication skills your communication, yeah your listening skills, how you relate with people, and skills that even address issues like gestures, the way I'm throwing my hands as it is it's also part of the training.
Speaker 2:It's also part of the exposure to say what kind of hand signals do you use. It's part of the communication package. You talk of how you package yourself, how you brand yourself with people. It speaks of your attire, your grooming. All those are skills that you develop over time. And also contextualizing the place to say where are we now? What kind of space are we? What environment are we? What are the dynamics that influence your ability to connect with your audience? At the end of the day, you then influence people around you and then you are also, you have a connection true, with people around you, and then you build relationships from there. So over the years I've learned the art of building relationships, creating, building and sustaining relationships wow so you heard it.
Speaker 1:So those are life skills that anyone can build on, and I think it's important especially for the young generation right now. Just develop skills, different ones, you know, do videography, go to school, have a degree, but continue building on those knowledge base because it will be important for you. So today we had an opportunity to sit with Komajo Zemkani sharing his story, his journey, where he has been up to this point, and I would say I'm enjoying myself here learning. I hope you're going to enjoy what you had to share with us today. Yeah so, komajo, thank you very much.
Speaker 3:It's been a good couple of minutes I wish I had more time we can go for hours talking yes and learning from each other.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, thank you very much no, it's my pleasure, kuda.
Speaker 2:Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to just share with you my life, my experience, as well as my thoughts yeah, it's a pleasure and I like these kinds of conversations. Yeah, and let it not end here, true? Yeah, we can always have another opportunity, or even another space, space yeah, I'm willing to engage because I believe I now call myself a teacher. I teach people in terms of minds mindset I want to influence thinking out there. I want to be a disruptor in the way people think differently.
Speaker 1:Very true, that's the only way it becomes a game changer. We think differently in everything that we do. Okay, if you had to give advice to your 20 old 20 year old self, what lessons do you want to leave them? Maybe two key lessons that you want to leave them. 20 year old self, you know 20 year old self.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'll teach myself, uh, that. Uh look at people who are ahead, who have gone the journey ahead of you. Learn from them through watching. I said I've learned the hard way Some of the lessons I've learned in life have been through personal experiences.
Speaker 2:But if I were to rewind the clock, I would choose to learn through other people's experience and let them learn the hard way on your behalf, let them pay the price on your behalf, so that, when you get to where they are now, you know what issues to avoid, what to take, what to do and what not to do. Yes, and then the second lesson that I want to teach myself as a 20-year-old is take it from yourself, inspire yourself, okay, motivate yourself. Live life according to your terms, because I've realized that most of the problems we have in life is we live life according to someone's terms, according to someone's ideas. But, joe, live life on your terms.
Speaker 1:On your own terms.
Speaker 2:Yes, you determine your own parameters. This is what I want to do and this is how I'm going to do it, because people always say something, whether you do well or you do bad, but instruct your own life.
Speaker 1:Perfect. Thanks very much, Joe, for your time.