Chelene's Nursing Journey

Come check this out and hear how Chelene learned one of the most powerful lessons of all—the importance of truly listening.

Her story is one you won’t want to miss. Tune in, then let me know what resonated with you most! 💙

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:17

Welcome to Nursing the Brave New World, where we sit down with individual nurses and talk about their journeys. Today, uh, I'm so glad you've decided to join us. I have Shalen with me today, and she's going to share her journey. Shalene, I'm so glad you decided to join me. We've known each other a long time, and it's good to have you on the show.

SPEAKER_01 0:36

Yes, thank you for inviting me. It's good to be here.

SPEAKER_00 0:40

So tell me a little bit about how you discover nursing as a career, and how did you really know that that was what you wanted to do with the rest of your life?

SPEAKER_01 0:50

Well, when I was when I was in uh high school, I remember doing an article where I told them that I'd been interested in nursing since I was eight. I don't know if that's true or not, but I know that I know that it it started, you know, quite young when I when I was a child. And I just, you know, once I was older and had a couple of my kids, I I realized that it was more of a a career choice. I, you know, I was a single mother, I raised four children, and I felt like it would be something, a profession I could enter that would help me um raise my family, give me better hours. And then when I got into it, I quickly realized that I really did love helping people, especially at their most vulnerable moments, when you know they they come to you at their lowest, and you're the one that's there to lift them up and help them, you know, on their journey.

SPEAKER_00 1:49

Yeah, it's definitely um there's some highs and lows to it for sure, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:54

Yes, yes. It is it is difficult when most of what you see are folks at their worst moments. It it can be challenging.

SPEAKER_00 2:04

Yeah, definitely, definitely. Um, so once you got out of nursing school, you know, we typically most nurses they find a specialty area that they really like, or maybe it might not be just one area, maybe a couple areas. So, what did you find that you really liked and why does that hold such a special place in your heart?

SPEAKER_01 2:24

When I got out of nursing school, almost immediately I realized that I was in love with um critical care, intensive care nursing. Um, that's always been a passion of mine. I I just I think I love the complexity of it. The folks were very sick. Um, the technology I thought, you know, was interesting using that technology and the skills that I had learned, you know, to take care of people and you know, sometimes bring them back from the brink. Um, I've I found all of that, you know, pretty fascinating. So I did start out as a med surge nurse. I had um an instructor in my associate degree program who gave me an a very good bit of advice. She said, regardless of the specialty, it's always good to start out as a med surge nurse because you learn, you know, your basic skills and your time management, you learn them kind of in the trenches. And then when you move into a specialty, that's when you can really grow your career and grow, you know, grow your knowledge base. So I did med surge for about uh two years, and then I had the opportunity to get into critical care and I worked in one of the bigger hospitals here where we live, and I loved it. I actually um never ended up in one unit. I floated around for about 15 years in the same hospital. Um, to each one, they had six different um intensive care units, and I worked in every single one of them, and they all had different personalities, just like people do. Um I think my favorite place to work was always trauma. Um trauma's kind of like you know, the party animal, the the you know, the crazy the crazy group, like you're in high school, is you know, it's the jocks and the party animals. So I always had a lot of fun with those, with those guys, but um I think as far as you know passion and the technicality of it, I really enjoyed um cardiac care. Um it's very, you know, it's very technical, and um the advancements they were making when we were younger, when we first started our nursing careers was you know uh interesting to me. All of all the all the machines and the technology to keep people alive and make people better was always very interesting to me.

SPEAKER_00 4:50

Yeah. I think um the ICU is always fascinating because you're I feel like you're caring for the whole person. Because when in medsurch, you're you're giving you know you're rounding, you're giving pills, you're checking blood sugars, you know. But when you're in ICU, you're bathing them, you know, you're checking their skin all the time. Like, not that you're check not checking that in med surge, but it just it's a whole nother level of I guess intensity, you know. Um, I always like that part of it, although, you know, I think you learn a lot in med surge, kind of reiterating what you say about managing your time, because when you have to manage eight or more patients, you know, I know I say that and that dates me because nowadays that ratio is not that high, but but when I got out on earth, she's gonna go it's pretty high.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

So yeah, it's a little different these days with as far as that's concerned. And it's funny that you say that. Um, I think part of what I really enjoyed about um critical care was not only taking care of the whole of the whole patient, like you said, but also um you got to know family members well because those folks were so sick. Um, you got to know family members well. You ended up kind of almost taking care of the patient and the family, um, you know, as the subject matter expert, as the nurse who they really look to you um to help them navigate and understand uh the disease process, the situation that the patient was going through, because these physicians, they're you know, as smart as they are, they don't have the time to sit and, you know, to listen and to help the patient and the family understand um from you know a layman's perspective what's going on, what to expect. Um, and you know, these are situations that can be very scary, something you've never gone through before, something that could be life-altering or life-ending. Um so to be that, you know, be that person that was there to help not only the patient, but you know, their loved ones through it, I think that's what led me into what I do now, which is case management. And truly, regardless of which unit or floor a patient is on as a case manager, you're doing not only taking care of the whole patient and the family in the hospital, but it it ends up reaching out into the the community. Um, in a way, you end up taking care of communities because you see these patients back again, you see family members come to the hospital. Um, you deal with post-acute care partners that you know you you bond and form relationships with, and it really does, it spills over into the community. And I think that's probably why I love I love case management. I've been in it for 15 of my 30 years now, because it has a lot to do with um has a lot to do with taking care of the whole patient and family, and it's much easier on your back than I use.

SPEAKER_00 8:00

Yes, definitely that for sure. Uh for sure. Yeah, you know, that is so funny that you talk about the whole person because you know, really your family's an extension of you, you know. And I mean, if you can't take care of the family, I mean that's just gonna, that's not gonna work, you know. So yeah, um, so um, you know, in nursing we have a lot of moments that can be memorable for bad reasons, good reasons. So, can you tell us about a time that you had like a memorable moment or event and like it could be good or bad? You could share more than one if you like, whatever you'd like to share.

SPEAKER_01 8:39

Well, honestly, I think that some of the most memorable moments go go back to um the ICU and even in case management now with those patients who are very sick, um, with the family and the patient, and being, I've always felt very, very humbled, very honored whenever we're part of um the end-of-life care and the end-of-life process for a patient and their family members. Um, that's something that I, you know, as a critical care nurse, as a case manager, um, you take very, very seriously. Um, I can think of, you know, many times that we were there and in particular, um, I'm sure there are several uh folks who can probably um agree with this and probably have the same experience. But you um we were talking earlier before before we came on about COVID. And I can think of several instances where I was or one of my case managers were the only person there for that individual as they were, you know, passing away or as they were very, very ill because of all of the restrictions as far as letting anyone into the hospitals at the time, letting family members in. Those were some really challenging times, and it was difficult to go through, but then you look back on it and you feel very blessed and very um thankful that you were able to be somebody who made that kind of a difference for families and for patients. I think it kind of took its toll on all of us. Those were some very difficult times. Um, the there was a couple of years there where it was rough, but I think that you know, in that time we made more of a difference for a lot of people than we had ever before that.

SPEAKER_00 10:39

Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Um, I can't really correlate to that because I wasn't, you know, at the bedside at that time, but you know, I've heard stories from different people. I had a friend tell me, I guess he shared on the podcast about how he was the last person kind of with someone because the family wasn't allowed to be with that person and how it was hard because he knew the family, he knew the person, and you know, I I can't imagine how that difficult that was must have been internally, you know.

SPEAKER_01 11:11

So I had I a similar I had a similar experience um as a director of case management in my previous position where I was when COVID was um happening. I had a friend whose sister um ended up on event and everything, and she did end up passing away, but because of restrictions, of course, my friend could not be with her sister. And the fact that I was there um at the end with her and that I was the one that was was holding her hand and and making sure that she was comfortable, making sure that you know that everything was peaceful for her. I know that my friend had told me after that that the only way that she could reconcile what happened and not being able to be there with her sister was because she knew that I was. So that was one of the more special, you know, moments in that difficult time. Just being able to be that person for my for a very long-standing friend. Um you know, that was that meant a lot.

SPEAKER_00 12:14

Oh yeah, yeah, for sure. Um, well, because you know, that's the like the lowest of low moment that a patient is at, and then they can't have the one person with them, yeah, you know, that means the most. That's that's really hard. I can't even imagine. Um, so the next question leads us to your mentors. So we all tend to have a mentor, someone we aspire to be like. So tell us a little bit about one of your mentors and what was so special about that mentor.

SPEAKER_01 12:46

Uh, I had a particular um at the last the last um hospital that I worked at, I had a director, a division director, um, who was over a few different hospitals, one of which was the one that I was the director at. And I think she was probably one of the most significant people in my life. Um this is this was the first directorship of case management that I had that I had. And it wasn't just that she obviously was a great resource as far as learning my job, learning the processes, and you know, learning um how to lead people, but she became, you know, she became a friend. And she was somebody that I could bounce ideas off of. She was all she was one of the most fair um employers and fair bosses I've ever worked for. Very, you know, she wasn't judgmental. She was, she was just, she was a good listener. She was just all she was the leader that I that I wanted to be. And it it was made very obvious to me when, you know, when she was kind of took me under her wing and was teaching me how to be a leader in the hospital that I worked in. It was very obvious to me that I wanted to model uh, you know, everything that I did and the way that I conducted myself. I wanted to model them after her. I had, you know, I had a lot of respect um and admiration for her to the point where she retired about five years ago. And we still see each other and talk to each other all the time. Um, I'm at a different hospital now, a bigger hospital. It was it was a bit of a promotion. And um, so you know, I don't ever hesitate to reach out to her. She has so many years of experience, but just, you know, she's just a wise person and I'm just a nice person. So I always, you know, I always think, what would she do in this situation? What would she, you know, how would she handle this? Even to this day, years later, I haven't worked with her for about, you know, four or five years. I still, you know, I still find myself reaching back to to ask her uh about certain situations when I'm not real sure about them.

SPEAKER_00 15:10

Yeah. I definitely think there are people like that in our life that I, you know, I can think of a few, but like they're just very impactful, you know, for whatever reason. And sometimes they say in your life and sometimes they don't, but they definitely make it leave an imprint on your life for sure. So that's a good one for sure. So um this question is well probably one of my favorite to ask people. So before you became a nurse when you were eight, I'm kind of kidding, but you know, because you talked about being eight. But before you became a nurse, you have everybody has a personal character trait that defines who they are. What what is a characteristic or trait you feel like that was made stronger or developed more by becoming a nurse?

SPEAKER_01 15:58

Um you know, honestly, uh I would probably say a person, I don't know if this was a personal character trait that I showed a lot of before becoming a nurse, but I will tell you that a personal character trait that I have now that I'm thankful for, that I nursing definitely improved and I grew was um my ability to listen. And not just to listen like I'm hearing you as you speak, but to listen with empathy, without judgment. Um, those years that we were talking about when all of this COVID stuff was going on, those were very instrumental in helping me to grow that. And then my years in case management, you know, people come in, like I said, they're sick, so they're kind of at the lowest of the low. And you can probably understand, given some of your um background, that you know, if they're not if nursing or or doctors aren't sure what to do about something, they call the case manager. So yeah, you end up so you know, you end up being their mortgage broker almost. So it it just, you know, I think that that that probably is a characteristic that I might have been better than most at listening to people, or at least I was told, you know, told that off and on over the years. But I would say that nursing has definitely um has definitely improved that um greatly because you know you have to be able you have to be able to listen effectively and hear what they need and what not what you think they need or what you think somebody, you have to meet them where they're at, not where you think they should be. And I think that my nursing career, if anything, has has really sharpened my actual listening skills.

SPEAKER_00 17:54

Yeah. It's funny that you bring this up because I don't think anybody has brought this up, and it really strikes a chord with me. So I'm gonna share um this is an individual story for me, and it has nothing to do with nursing, but it kind of does. But when you talked about listening, so in college, I had a friend who is a teacher, and she had to practice like reading books to us. And I remember at the beginning of one of the semesters early in my career college career with her, she told me when I she was done reading it to me in practice, and she said, You're not listening to me. And I remember getting that feedback from her and thinking, and she gave me like specific reasons why she felt like I wasn't listening. And so it really kind of hit me hard that listening is more like you said, than just hearing what they're saying, you know, it's like absorbing what they're saying and not thinking about what you're gonna say next before they finish.

SPEAKER_02 19:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:01

You know, I probably struggle with that more in my own personal life than I do work. Yeah. But anyway, that that's a really good point. That was a great one to bring up. But um, so this next question I think is also interesting. So, did you ever have a time? I know COVID was difficult, but ever have a time that you were so challenged with being a nurse that you felt like, I don't even know if I want to be a nurse, and it made you question if you wanted to do something different, or was it just you knew that's what you needed to keep doing? Because I know somebody, some people vary on this.

SPEAKER_01 19:39

So um I think everybody goes through, you know, times in their nursing career. I I, you know, I would be lying if I said in 30 years I haven't thought about doing something else, especially if as things have evolved, um, regulations and you know, just the state of healthcare is so different than it was even when I started 15 years ago as a case manager. I mean, you have to be, you have to be really savvy and you have to be a subject matter expert on, you know, on a lot of different things with case management on social, financial, all those things. Um, sometimes when you are trying to help folks and they don't necessarily want to accept your help, they don't want to be nice about it. They, you know, for whatever reason, and again, that comes back to trying to listen and figure out where do I need to meet this person because obviously there's something I'm not privy to. There, there's a reason why they're so, you know, why they're angry or why why they're so defensive or you know, non-compliant. When you're, you know, that can be that can take a toll on you personally and be personally exhausting. And I think there have been times, you know, throughout my nursing career that I thought, oh, you know, maybe I'll go back to school and do something different, you know. But at the end of the day, I I always come back to it as nursing is more of a calling than a career. Um, anybody who's going into nursing needs to understand this is definitely what I want to do. Because if you if you truly, you know, if you truly take up the calling, even though you feel like I don't know if I want to do this today or tomorrow, the next day is a new day. And you know, your calling is to help people. I have a wonderful pastor that um comes to see patients for a hospice company up here. And he gave each of us a shirt. I wear mine all the time. He gave each of us a shirt here in case management that has the word nurse across it, and then it says called according to his purpose.

unknown 21:59

Oh.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

And honestly, I that I feel is it kind of sums up why I'm still doing it 30 years later through a lot of changes and not always good changes, you know. So I think that I have thought of other things, but I always come back to the fact that I really truly believe this is what I'm supposed to be doing.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

Yeah, that's definitely I think that's I think you have to within yourself just know that you're pulled in that direction and it's you're it's so strong, you know. For you to, I mean, because it's one thing to say you want to help people, but to understand the level of help you have to provide people, I think is a whole nother thing, you know.

SPEAKER_01 22:42

Oh yeah, there are easier ways to help people.

SPEAKER_00 22:44

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. If that's your only reason, run for the hills. Yeah, exactly. So you've already kind of talked about why or why, why or why not you would choose nursing again, but tell me maybe some lessons you feel like you've learned along the way and how that would kind of overlap into maybe advice you would give someone who was considering going into nursing.

SPEAKER_01 23:08

Well, one of the things um I already touched on, one of the lessons that I've learned um, besides, you know, listening skills, is just again to meet people where they are, um, to understand, to take the time to understand like the challenges and the fears that keep folks, you know, that are barriers that keep folks from being able to get well or to be, you know, to be their whole self. And every, you know, everybody has a unique story. You have to listen and understand um, you know, where they're at and where they can go. You know, you you push too far and then you haven't helped them any more than if you, you know, if you didn't, if you if you didn't take up that that challenge at all. And then as a leader, you know, I've got 13 employees that they're just as important to take care of as my patients that we have here in the hospital. I mean, what I've learned, I have an amazing group of ladies that work for me right now, and you know, they're just knocking it out of the park as far as what they're expected to do. And honestly, I think when they A, when they feel supported and B, when they feel like their contribution is valued, you know, because everybody likes to think that they're doing something, they're getting up every morning and doing something of value, not just earning a paycheck. You know, when I when I'm able to make them feel that way, then they're able to make the patients feel that way. They're able, they're able to meet those goals, they're able to help those folks because they feel like they're supported and cared for. And honestly, I I um was talking to you earlier before um that my youngest child of four is now a nurse, and she's a nurse at a big uh big county hospital. And so, you know, um life and day day-to-day struggles can be intense, um, especially in your first year of nursing. And honestly, um, as we spoke about before, I told her you you have to make sure that you're called to do this. Um, you don't do it because the paycheck looks good or you know, because you look good in scrubs or whatever. I mean, you have you have to be called, truly called to do this because it can be challenging. And then if if somebody were new to it or thinking about it, some of the other advice I would give is definitely, and and it's funny because I had this conversation with her the other day when she called me in tears about a shift that she had a rough shift that she'd had. And you know, you've got to give yourself some grace, especially in that first year to even four or five years. You're learning a lot, the learning curve is huge. I mean, there aren't many professions where you go to work that day, and if you're a little too tired and make a mistake, you might kill somebody. Um, that's a lot of responsibility. So I just told her, like you, it was great that you asked that mentor question because I told her, I said, you need to find a preceptor or a mentor and get with that person, somebody you feel comfortable with, and learn everything you can from them that first year. And no question is silly or dumb when people's lives are, you know, in the balance. No, no question is silly. And I just told her, give yourself some grace when you don't know things or you're not sure about things, you think you've made a mistake, you know, um, because it it's a tough road. It's a tough road. You have to give yourself just as much compassion as you give the patients that you're caring for. You have to give yourself as much grace as you give those folks who are in their worst hour because you you're in that worst hour with them. Yeah. And emotionally you're you're attached to you're attached to that moment and that memory just like they are. And if you can kind of take care of yourself like that and find somebody who can help you learn and grow where you don't feel like you're out there all by yourself, you know, then it's, you know, 30 years from now, you're still gonna be in it and you're still gonna be able to talk about it as um, you know, a profession that that you don't regret and something that that you feel like was really fulfilling career.

SPEAKER_00 27:34

Yeah, and you know what you think about it, there's so many things about being a nurse that is I think that I think is rewarding, but it's also emotionally hard. But like nurturing people and like supporting them and advocating for them, that's just some of the things that come to mind. And like all of that kind of plays into what you were talking about just now, you know, with her and like you know, making sure that you really know that is what you want to do. Cause I've you know, I I know you've seen in the news before where there was one nurse, I think she made like a a fatal error with newborns or something, and they ended up passing away. And you know, I see that, and it really to be honest with you, I'm saddened that the children passed away. I am, but I'm also sad for her because I feel like at the end of the day, that that was never her intention, you know. Yeah, um, she didn't wake up that morning and think, okay, I'm gonna make this error, but you know, it just goes to show you how much you were kind of holding in your hands as you go throughout that day. Yeah. Um I think that's the why people sometimes do leave bedside, is because there's a lot of pressure and stress, you know, to take care of the patient and not make errors and be this perfect person that really none of us can be. We can't none of us are perfect, you know. So that's some really good points. Um, well, Shilene, I've really enjoyed talking to you about like your journey, and it's brought up so many things and um that are we've had good discussion about. Is there anything else you'd like to share with our audience before we go?

SPEAKER_01 29:16

No, I appreciate the opportunity, you know, to talk about it. It's really neat. Um, when you said we were going to do this, um, it was kind of nice to to be able to take that time to think about the things that we've talked about and really honestly look back. You you get so caught up in today and like what you're doing today. I'm trying to run this department in this big hospital. And it's it's nice to be able to look back at some of the other facets and the other eras of your nursing career and remember, you know, be able to remember it fondly, which I do. I've made so many friends. Um, you do, you make lifelong friends. It's a very small world in nursing and in case management. And it's just nice to be able to um look back at it and and think about stuff I hadn't thought about in a long time. So thank you for that.

SPEAKER_00 30:07

Oh, you're welcome. And it's so funny that you brought that up because you know, you and I, other than texting on Messenger, I've really haven't talked in a long, long time. And I actually have been able to reconnect with some of the ICU people that I used to work with in where we live. And not necessarily that I go out with them or anything, but like one of them I had dinner with. And I mean, it's just been really, it's kind of been really cool to tell you the truth, because it like had I not been doing this, I would have never probably reconnected with them, you know.

SPEAKER_01 30:39

Yeah, and it's good to surround yourself with people. We're in a very we're in a very unique environment in a bubble that a lot of people don't understand. So you do need to keep those relationships and surround yourself with people who understand what you're going through. Uh-huh as part of taking care of yourself, I think.

SPEAKER_00 30:57

Yeah, I I think it is, it's self-care for sure. So, well, again, thank you so much for like coming on and sharing. It's been great talking to you. Um, so I wanted to thank the audience today for joining us and listening into nursing the brave new world. If you would love to share your journey, also you can email us at nursing brave newworld at gmail.com. Go out and be bold, be brave, and be you.