EP 223 | The Power of "And": Breaking Free from a Single Identity with Lauren Boss

How many of us have an identity that maybe is wrapped into our career?Lauren Boss knows that moment firsthand and she also knows what can grow from it. After nearly a decade in the corporate world, she’s navigated motherhood, freelancing, self-publishing a memoir, and an unexpected leap into business ownership that put her in the CEO seat.

Lisa and Lauren talk about the confidence of being an “and,” not an “or.” We get real about the identity shift that happens when you stop being “the corporate girl,” the quiet ways we lose our voice over time, and how you rebuild it through small, brave actions. Lauren shares how journaling, meditation, faith, and quiet reflection helped her find clarity, trust her intuition, and redefine success on her own terms, not someone else’s checklist.

Chapters:

• 2:40: Corporate Life And Identity
• 6:45: Layoff Reset And Freelancing
• 11:50: Becoming An And Not Or
• 15:25: Writing A Memoir From Journals
• 18:29: Finding Your Voice Again
• 28:55: Motherhood And Not Feeling Alone
• 32:26: Buying A Business With Your Husband
• 35:41: Real Work Life Logistics
• 40:52: Advice For Women Feeling Stuck

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Check out Lauren's book here: https://www.amazon.com/All-Girls-Was-Before-Motherhood/dp/B0FRS8XTZR 

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Transcript

Welcome And Big Theme

SPEAKER_01 0:00

You know, it's not about ignoring who you've been before, it's about loving all the different pieces.

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Welcome to the Confident Podcast. I am Lisa Tarkington, your guide to mastering confidence and leadership. As a business and leadership coach, keynote speaker, and the founder behind the Nonprofit Lead, I am here to equip you with the confidence, clarity, and strategy to create game-changing results so that you can step into your power as the person that you are meant to be. If you press play today, it's because you're ready for something bigger. Each episode, I'll bring you real, raw conversations and actionable insights that will empower you to redefine your leadership, reclaim your confidence, and transform into the instoppable force you've always been known to be. This isn't just another podcast, it's your journey that we're on together. So buckle up and let's dive into this transformation. Hi, everybody, welcome back for another episode of the Confident Podcast. I'm your host, Lisa Tarkington. And today is one episode that's going to hit home for me. Um, I would say in a world that's like continuously putting us into boxes, asking us to choose, you know, one career, one niche, one identity. My guest today is living proof that you don't have to choose just one thing. You can be a multitude of different things. Um her and I actually met when we were working in the corporate world together. We were colleagues, we were doing the grind. Um, but since then, she has rewritten her story. She didn't just leave like the nine to five to, you know, chill. She definitely did not chill after that. She became a freelance powerhouse, a mother of three boys, um, and an author that she launched this book while she was pregnant with her third son. And recently her and her husband took a big leap, a massive leap of faith, I feel. And they bought a company that they both now run. She's a CEO. Um, and it's been so cool to see her journey over time. We, you know, didn't always stay connected when we left the corporate world, but when we reconnected, it was like no pat no time has passed. We both were able to connect on just the new life that we both have now, which is really cool. And so we're gonna be talking today about the confidence of being an and, not just an or. So you're not just a corporate worker or a mom, not just an author or an entrepreneur, but you're all of these things without losing yourself in the process. And so, with that, I am so excited for you guys to meet uh Lauren Boss, um, who is now an author, a mom, and a CEO. So let's dive into today's interview. Hi, Lauren.

Corporate Life And Identity

SPEAKER_00 2:40

Welcome to the confident podcast. Hi, Lisa. So great to be here. It's been a long time coming. I know. I'm so glad we're gonna be talking about your book. We're gonna be talking about your business, kids. Literally, girl, I feel like you're doing everything. So, first off, congratulations. I feel like, you know, we met when we were in corporate world together. Um, and for everybody to know, like it's funny to look back and think about our positions in a big corporate world. Like, you got to do some really cool things in your job, and so did I. And looking back, I'm like, oh, we were pretty young to be to be doing some things. And then fast forward, we're both not working in corporate anymore. We've reconnected and you've been doing some incredible stuff. So, first off, congratulations.

SPEAKER_01 3:26

Thank you. I'm so excited to share it with you. And I know it's like a different life, it feels like it's like it's in our previous, our previous life, like we're in a whole different world now. But yeah, we did do a lot of cool things at our private uh at our previous employer, and they gave us a lot of responsibility and great opportunities at a young age. And I think that really prepared me for where I've gone in the rest of my career and where I'll go in the future. So I'm really thankful for it. Um, but I you and I both have kind of chosen different paths than staying on that. Many stay on that for their whole career, which is great if that's what you're looking for. But we've we've kind of gone in these different avenues. So I'm so excited to share those with you.

SPEAKER_00 4:02

Yeah. Well, it's funny this morning. So I'm working with a company that is a corporation and I have them coming up in a few months. And I literally thought about this recently. You know, remember when we did a lot of PowerPoints to like showcase things? Yeah. And this morning, so many, they sent me a PowerPoint. They're like, this will prepare us for our next meeting. And I was reflecting on that, thinking, I haven't put together a PowerPoint like to present at a meeting and forever, but it's a corporation. So they're just so used to it. So I'm like, oh, this is gonna be like taking me back a little bit in a good way. Yeah, you know, for them, it's just so different when you're out and you learn a different way of thinking. Like, I don't use presentations like PowerPoints when I'm presenting, I just speak, right?

SPEAKER_01 4:45

Yeah, I haven't thought about that that much. And I I like it better when people just speak or have like a like a one visual, like they have a board in their writing on it, or they have like one, you know, diagram something, like instead of like PowerPoint, PowerPoint. That was so drilled into us. And I I had this thought, and I don't know if I ever like spoke it out loud, but like I kind of felt a little bit after leaving the corporate world that PowerPoint's like where creativity goes to die. Like it's a good way to share information, but it's not super creative, or it's not just like the strongest communication in my in my opinion. So, like there's things you can share on there, but I feel like it was always like get every detail on there and put all these numbers on and all this and all these charts. And it's like, okay, we probably could have gone a little more simplified, like maybe one visual and talk about it instead of having to walk through each little piece on a slide.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

But I think, yeah, to well, I agree. I think it's funny thinking back to being like, wow, that's all I knew. And now I'm like, oh, I have to speak on these things. I have to have the knowledge. I can't rely on a PowerPoint. And I actually love that because my brain is so like different and creative and thought provoking. So, anyways, that is literally, we haven't we weren't even started yet on what we're gonna talk about. But I literally had to share that because it was on my mind this morning. I'm like, oh yeah, imagine if people didn't rely on those things and we relied on our own knowledge, you know, because we're going into an AI world now where that's, you know, we're shifting and changing. So I'm gonna go back to you, corporate. You have left the corporate world. So let's go back to that moment. You left the corporate world. You're probably thinking in your head, oh my gosh, what am I going to do? And fast forward, here you are. Um, we'll get into all these things, but you're a mom, you're a wife, you're um a business owner, you've written a book, you've done like you freelanced. Take us to that moment. And then what was your decision to not find another corporate job?

Layoff Reset And Freelancing

SPEAKER_01 6:45

Yeah. And it's so funny looking back, like you don't know where you're gonna end up. But then when you look back, it almost like all makes sense. And so it was 2023, and I had just come back from maternity leave with my second son. So he was like a couple months old, and I was just getting back into it, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna go back to work and make this work with two kids and and be full time, although I had, you know, some things pulling on my heart strings from that aspect. And I was like, I want more time with the kids, but you know, but we're just gonna figure out a way to make it work. Um, and I went back to work and they were doing a lot of layoffs and reorganization at the company, and they, it was very sudden, like put an invite on your calendar for the next morning with like somebody above my supervisor. It wasn't even my leader. And then it was like, okay, this is probably not good. Um, and then they, you know, told me that the role was being eliminated. And there was the opportunity to apply for other roles within the company, or, you know, or I could take the severance and there were certain non-compete um aspects to that. So I couldn't go right away and work like in the same market for a competitor. Um, so yeah, there was an aspect of that. So I I like kind of weighed my options, but very quickly I came to the fact that like I want to take this time to be with my family and really reset and think about like what do I really want to do next? Cause I had been in that company for about 10 years at that time. So it had been a big chunk of time and I was like, this is a good time to maybe reset and look at where I want to go next, whether that's within this industry or something totally different. And so I took that step back and luckily I was able to take some severance, which gave me, you know, kind of a a little a little net there to be able to make some other moves and think about things. So yeah, I really used that time to start reflecting. I started journaling, I started doing meditation, I got deeper in my faith. I mean, when you don't have a job and you don't know where you're going, like you have to be like, God help me, tell me what's next for me. Like, speak to me, let me, let me know what's the right move for me. So yeah, all of that, I feel like I grew really spiritually, mentally, and physically during that time and just had this great time to be with my family. And then I started, you know, coming to the realization that I think I could be my own boss at this point in my life. I have the right business background and experiences. I have some savings. Like, so that's when I stepped into freelancing. That's when I stepped into writing a book, um, which just kind of was an evolution of like my journaling and reflecting on where I'd been and where I wanted to go next. And then eventually, fast forward to now, at the end of last year, I acquired a company uh from a woman who was retiring and she had run it for over 30 years. And so I've been, you know, training with her and my husband's a part of the company as well. So we've both been training with her and with the team. And I I thought about it in hindsight. I jumped from, I was like, okay, I was a marketing manager a couple of years ago and got laid off. And a couple of years later, by getting off of that career path, I'm now the CEO. So, you know, that you can have a pretty big jump, even when things seem like they're taking a turn for the for the worse. You know, there's always a way to make it a positive.

SPEAKER_00 9:49

Yes. Well, I love your journey. And I think what's cool, like you just said, it's you don't always know what the future holds. And I think that that's the scary part, especially for type A people like me, where it's like, I just want to know what 10 years from now looks like. And then you get out five years and you're like, oh, this isn't what I expected. This is actually like better. And it always is, or it's always, or sometimes I always say, like, it might not even be better yet, but you're going through something to shift you and help you get there. But I think I love that. Yeah. Well, and I think too, when it comes to all of these like roles, especially when you're leaving corporate, and this is just my experiences is like I was very tied to my not my title, but like I'm a corporate girl, like I'm working, like I like I get to travel, I get to do these things. And how did you in your process? It sounds like journaling was part of it, but how did you decouple from all of like your title being Lauren, the girl that traveled the world? Like in a sense, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:46

Yeah, it was, I mean, it was hard. And it is like, it's kind of like a hit to your ego and to your identity when something like huge in your life happens, whether it's a relationship changes or your job changes, you know, whatever it is. And and I was like, without knowing it at the time, very identified with that, right? I was traveling all over North America. I was getting awards for being a high achieving sales and marketing professional. And I was proud of that and I enjoyed that. And there were there were a lot of perks and good things to that. But then when I had to step away and say, okay, that's not what I'm doing anymore, you know, I had to look at what is my value, what are my identities, what do I value going forward and and what's important to me. And it it was you had to like peel back the layers of who you are and and what is important to you, and then start to rebuild that. And and that's when faith became an even bigger part of my life. So I'm so thankful for that because I think I was more like identifying as these professional things more than um on some deeper level of

Becoming An And Not Or

SPEAKER_01 11:50

what I should have been digging more into. So it actually opened up a lot of positives for me in that way. Um, but yeah, you have to you have to kind of work through and decide, you know, what what that means to you going forward and what you value, and and you have to find that inherent worth instead of your your dollar to dollar figure when you go through something like that, trying to define yourself by that.

SPEAKER_00 12:09

It's tough. Well, and I think what you're saying too is um as you were talking, the thing that kept coming up for me is you get when you've when you're going through an identity crisis, you also realize, wow, I am a facet of many things, but I've allowed one thing to be my identity. And I think that that is what I think has been so cool as I've been going through identity shifts in the last year of wait, I can be more than one thing, right? And I've had I've kind of like questioned that. So when you've noticed, like I think it's like you don't have to be an or, right? Like you don't have to be a mom or a business owner. You don't have to be a mom or an author, you don't have to be an author or a business owner. You get to be an and. And I think that that's kind of the topics of today is you're a multifacet person, which I love. And so how do you show up your full self in every aspect of your life?

SPEAKER_01 13:07

Yeah. And I I open my book with that actually in the intro. I I list out sort of these uh conflicting things like I've been the breadwinner and I've been laid off. I've been the life of the party, and now I'm loving, enjoying life soberly. There's so many different aspects that we evolve through throughout our life, and not any single one of them has to define you. You can always keep changing and you can be many things at once. So yeah, the big things in my life right now are motherhood, trying to be a good spouse as well, being a good leader and teammate on my on my new business venture and the author side of it. Like it just shifts. Like every day is a little bit different, and you're never gonna be able to be like perfect or 100% in any aspect of it, right? It's like there's a saying that says they expect you to be um to work like you have no kids and then be with your kids like you have no job. You know what I'm saying? There's always this pull, and that that's okay. I'm that's okay to have, you know, maybe you're 100% in on one one day and 75, 25 the other. I think that's just all about the balance and finding what's right for you. And that's why I also emphasize to women defining success on your own terms, because if you try to look elsewhere, everybody's doing it differently and everybody has a different set of what's important to them and what they want to prioritize. And what's important to me this year could be totally different in two years, five years, you know, what I'm balancing at that point. So I think it's just giving yourself grace and trusting the shifts and letting it kind of flow and and and leaning into all the different parts of yourself and not feeling bad and not feeling guilty for not being 100% in one thing and allowing yourself that space to to kind of grow and evolve in many different aspects of your life.

SPEAKER_00 14:55

I love that because you make some really great points of the people that know you know those that you're the multifacet and love you for it. And the more that you can love yourself for all of those pieces and mistakes, like it's easier for everybody else to see that confident you come out of it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:12

Yeah, totally. And and the more that you're yourself and the more that you're unapologetically all these different things, I think you're you're right, it empowers other people to do the same. And then they appreciate you even more for it.

SPEAKER_00 15:24

Yes. So

Writing A Memoir From Journals

SPEAKER_00 15:25

your book, All the Girls I Was Before. First off, I read this in it's funny because I read this, I think over my maternity leave. And I was in my old house. We've moved, and I remember those moments of like, oh, like I can relate on so many levels. So, Tommy, what inspired you to write this book? What would our audience learn from you?

SPEAKER_01 15:49

Yeah. So this book, All the Girls I Was Before, it's a memoir of career and motherhood and becoming who you're meant to be. And it is about redefining success on your own terms. And I started to journal after I lost my job and was trying to figure out my new identity and what was important to me and just trying to get clear and just find clarity on where I was going to go in the future. And then it also forced me to face my past. So who had I been in the past and what things had I not healed and some things that were traumatic in the past, and how I could kind of let go of those and move forward into who I wanted to be. And that it just all kind of started flowing out of me. And it it was a really organic process. And then I had written all these stories and different kinds of trials and evolutions I had gone through as a woman and how I found my voice again and found how to trust my inner voice, my intuition, but also my outer voice to speak up for what was right for me and what was not, and to try to develop my dreams going forward. And I sat on it for a little while. I was like, am I just gonna keep this to myself or am I gonna share it? And I prayed about it and I just really felt called that if there's someone else that these stories could help, why not share them in some form? And then that's when I started going down the path of figuring out how do you publish a book. I mean, I did not come from that background at all. Um I always liked to write when I was younger, and then when I got into the workforce, I think I kind of let that part of myself, you know, get put away on a shelf. And then it just started coming back and and I I just figured it out. Like when there's a will, there's a way. So I figured out how to get it self-published and and then I I just went after it. And then my goal was just to share it with as many women as I could. And and in my mind, it was like if it helps one woman, then that's good enough for me. And I've had such a great reception and and it's done better than than I even dreamed. So yeah, it's been it's been a process and it's been a really beautiful journey.

SPEAKER_00 17:49

Well, I love this for you, and I love it for the audience. I remember reading it, and I think when you just said the what you just said about finding your voice, uh, because I know your voice, I could hear your voice. You know, it's one of those types of things when you're listening when you're reading a book. So talk, talk us through that a little bit because I think too, when we're talking about this multifacet person, it is very easy to kind of put our voice to the side on certain topics, or I'm gonna stay silent here and not bring my full self forward. So talk a little bit about a time when you did lose your voice and like how you've pivoted moving forward because obviously you found your voice. You've

Finding Your Voice Again

SPEAKER_00 18:29

written a book, but I know that wasn't an easy process to get to.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

Yeah. And and I I think I would have been scared to do it even more so um back when I was 100% in the corporate world. I I don't know why I like had that feeling again. It's like you're this one thing. So it's like, I can't be an author. I'm, you know, I'm a marketing manager. I have to focus on that and I have to only be that. But and and what if people don't agree with what I have to say in the workforce or or and I don't, I don't really have that fear anymore. But once I faced it, I'm I'm I'm over it. But yeah, I start out the book, the very first chapter, I talk about when I was a teenager and I was a passenger in a car accident and I knew I didn't want to ride with the person. And I I just had this feeling, but I didn't speak up for myself because I was like, well, you know, I'm just I just have to go along with what the plan was. You know, that's who's giving me a ride home tonight. So um yeah, and I ended up in a very, in a very dangerous situation. And then there was a police report that came of that situation, and they took his story first and then asked me about what had happened. And they were just like, oh, what he said is is what happened, right? And and it wasn't the true story. And I just was a young girl and I went along and didn't want to get him in trouble. So I said, I just, you know, nodded and said yes and didn't really speak up for anything. Um, and then as I've reflected back on those things as I've I've grown and gotten older, it makes me so sad because if I had a young woman in my life, I would want to look out for her and stick up for her and have her stick up for herself. And the fact that I was not confident enough to do that at the time makes me really sad and makes me really proud, though, of how far I've come that now I'm I'm like, I am gonna speak up for myself. I am gonna speak up for what is right. And I've just you grow it a little bit over time, you know, just being willing to stand up for yourself, stand up for others, other women, you know, whatever it is, and just getting a little more confident and brave over time with that from an external voice. And then from an internal voice, what's helped me a lot, just get clear on my thoughts and and in the directions I want to go is is just getting time to be quiet, like stepping away from the social media and the echo chambers that can be in many workforces. Like people just reiterate the same ideas and everyone kind of goes along. Sometimes you need to step away and have a little quiet time or reflection time to think, you know, what is my opinion on this um before you before you just go along with the crowd?

SPEAKER_00 20:55

Yeah. And I guess the question that I have, first off, A, glad you're okay with that like vehicle piece. I also um I also can relate and resonate with, you know, it makes you sad to think about like those moments of our lives where like, ah, if only, but we can't go backwards to your point, like, but we can look at like how far you've come. And so you talk about these little increments. And I think that that's the thing is I want to ask you so badly, Lauren, what was that like moment where like everything clicked and you had your voice? But we both know that sometimes there's other, those are those moments, and then there's times where it's like, no, it was actually little. But was there a moment where you're like, I have to speak up? I'm sh scared, I might be shaking a little bit, but if I don't, I'm gonna keep living old Lauren. Is there one that comes to my mind? Yeah, comes to my mind.

SPEAKER_01 21:47

Well, when it comes to writing the book, I I started sharing about my journey on LinkedIn as and online as I was writing it, just like the process. And I was like shaking in my boots to talk about it. Like, I'm like, who am I to talk about? About this, you know, I've never written a book before. Um, but again, it was like if I share my journey and maybe other people learn along the way or they feel brave enough to follow their dream or whatever is calling them, whether it's a book or anything else, I just felt like internally that's what I needed to do. But there's like the external fear of of making that a reality. So that that really pushed me like to to open up and share my journey of even doing it. It kind of gave me um some accountability, maybe that I knew other people were watching me do it. And even if I failed or got delayed or, you know, whatever happened. I guess there is no fail because, you know, how do you fail when you're following what you feel called to do? You're just learning, I guess, is more of what I would call it. But it's like, what if I'm learning a little bit, you know, roughly in front of others? But yeah, I just started sharing a little bit of at a time of of my dream and of my voice. And then I just kind of built up and I would sweat a little bit less each time I would talk about it and shake a little bit less each time I would share online about what I was doing. And then eventually I started sharing it, you know, with a small group of beta readers and things like that to just share my voice. And each each step I took, I just got a little bit more confident, right? So it's it's not that I wasn't afraid to sh to use my voice. Um, I was.

SPEAKER_00 23:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:17

But but you just you have to face the fear and and take a little step at a time.

SPEAKER_00 23:22

Yeah. Well, and I love that you said like I started something, right? Like I just started and I knew it would scare me, but if I knew, but if I didn't, I would keep going through this. And as you were talking, I was really reflecting on like my voice a little bit. And I go back to, I kid you not, when I was 20. I didn't care. Meaning, like I felt like, you know, I I not that I lived two lives, I shouldn't say it like that, but I did have a blog during corporate. And I remember talking actually about an experience that I had on corporate on my blog. Oh, I got back to the leaders.

SPEAKER_02 23:57

Oh, how did that go?

SPEAKER_00 23:59

Uh I mean, they literally apologized for it happening. They also said, you know, why didn't you bring this to us? Instead, you published it on your blog. Fair, in my 20s, again, I didn't care. And I was like, oh, why can't I be both? Why can't I share my experience? I actually thought that I could do both. But the interesting piece is when you get your hands slapped enough, you start to lose your voice. And I noticed that over time is that I started to be postured Lisa, more put together Lisa. I noticed that through my whole career. Then making the shift to the corporate to the nonprofit, I was even more polished. And so it's been fun when I'm now looking at my future of like, well, I miss old Lisa. And there's this, um, I don't know if you've seen it on Instagram, but there's this like view of like 2016, and then it's like squiggle lines, and then it's the 2026, and it's like, or 2026, yeah. And you're coming back to yourself. And I look at that and I'm like, wow, I can see that for myself. Like it's totally I love my experience, but I and I'm grateful and everything that I've done. But I also feel like the coming home piece, and I've said that a lot on this podcast um recently. But when you were talking about that, that's what it made me think of is oh, wow, I lost my voice. I had it because I was listening to all of the hand slaps. When I say hand slaps of just like, you know, don't do that again. And and I wish I would have had the voice then to be like, why not?

SPEAKER_01 25:31

Right. Yeah, you start to lose pieces of yourself. And I and I totally get that. And with the theme of the book, All the Girls I Was Before, it's not about, you know, it's not about ignoring who you've been before. It's about loving all the different pieces. And sometimes, like I said, even with the writing, I I used to love to do that when I was younger and then kind of just got away from it. And it I you're saying how it was like this. Yeah. I kind of picture it like a spiral sometimes and where it's like, you think you're okay, like I overcame this, but like you might come back to it, but in a different way, but you're you're moving up, but it's still going, you know, in a in a spiral. So it's like you have to come back to that place to be brave, to be confident, to face the fear, or to reignite that part of you that maybe you lost in the past and um, or that you kind of had quieted down by the external world. And and sometimes um I I have reflection prompts in the book, and I talk about like, what would your, you know, nine or ten years, nine or 10-year-old old self love to do? Like, did they play soccer? Did they run? Did they play an instrument? Um, and then what what would you want to be thinking that you are proud of and happy about your life if you were 90 looking backwards, right? So looking in both directions and seeing like, what do I love and what is the most important and how do I bring more of that into like the present moment? So yeah, I think you can look in both directions of things that maybe you lost or loved or want to reignite.

SPEAKER_00 26:55

Yes, I love that. Well, and I think to your point, like you can still love all of your past. And we've had some podcast um guests on recently that have shared those things too. And so it's really good to hear the resonation from so many leaders, right? Like, okay, like I still love the past me. I want to bring some of her with me, um, but I'm also growing into a new human, which is so cool. And speaking of humans, you've just had a human. So what? We have three boys, right?

SPEAKER_01 27:20

Yes, three boys. So I have a six-year-old, a three-year-old, and then a about five-month-old.

SPEAKER_00 27:26

Oh my goodness, time is just flying. And I think it's so beautiful that you get to be the multifacet. We talk a lot about confidence on this show.

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SPEAKER_00 27:34

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Motherhood And Not Feeling Alone

SPEAKER_00 28:55

So obviously that's motherhood is in the book. You've added since then to your family. Um, but I think it was so cool following you on social while you were promoting the book and you're like, I'm I'm gonna have a baby soon, but I'm gonna keep going. And you were just finding that new, I would say like I'm gonna use the word balance, probably not the best word, but like you're finding the new lifestyle for yourself at that time. And so anything else with the book that you feel like, hey, the audience needs to hear.

SPEAKER_01 29:23

Yeah, one thing I would want them to hear is another theme of the book is that we're not alone. And sometimes we can feel so alone, whether that's in motherhood or the workforce, or you know, being a woman in the workforce or both, and it's like you're trying to balance them and you're like, WTF am I doing? And like you feel like you're the first one to ever have to do this because it's so personal and it's so it's like breaking you, or or not breaking you, but it's growing you and it's pulling you and stretching you. Um, motherhood in particular, that it's like it's just such a new experience when you're going through it, or when you're adding a new human to your family, or it's it's just it can feel so so hard and it can feel kind of like you're alone. So I I just want to share that, you know, we're not alone. And when I look back through any of the trials, whether that's in motherhood or, you know, accidents that happened and just different things that losing your job, like it feels like very alone and very, very hard at the time. And then you always look back and you see, you know, I wasn't alone. You know, God was with me, or these friends and family were supporting me. And there are other people on the same journey or they're at different points in it, you know. And and I love mentorship. I've had people that have mentored me and I'm mentoring others. Like there are other people on the journey that have similar paths. It's not always gonna be the exact same as yours, but that you're not alone. So I just want women to know that and get that from this book too, that other people are going through it. They might be in different parts of the journey, but you are certainly not alone and and don't feel that way and don't be scared to reach out for help.

SPEAKER_00 30:57

I love that. Well, and I think what your book does really well. So, like I'm just gonna open it so I can share exactly what I'm talking about. But if you go to literally the table of contents, I think you do a great job of literally, you know, baby on board, job lost, and self-found. I can literally mental health finding your way. I can literally go here and be like, all right, what do I need to hear today? Oh, yeah. You can jump around.

SPEAKER_01 31:20

It doesn't have to be read in order. Like you can be like, okay, I'm in the trenches of trying to balance motherhood and and and work. Like, has anyone else been feeling this? Like, and and jump to that. Or you can feel like, I really want to get my mental health or physical health back on, you know, what's the first step I could take to get there. So I'm not saying I'm an expert in any of those fields, but I'm saying I have been a burnout mom. I have been lost in what should I do next in my career. You know, I've just I've been in those those transition periods and trying to figure out how do I get the new balance and how do I keep my head above water and and find the next, the next place to swim to, right? So uh yeah. And I think it helps the reader just reflect on where they are because I put the journal prompts at the end of each chapter and they can say, okay, you know, what what am I up against right now? And what can I do to try to find my way?

SPEAKER_00 32:12

Yes, love that. Okay, so since we're talking about multifacets, we've talked about corporate to freelance to mom life. We've talked about the book. So let's dive into your new venture that you guys have been cooking up in your household.

Buying A Business With Your Husband

SPEAKER_00 32:26

So, first off, congrats on being a CEO. Um I know that you've done something different than I have, where you know, I've always started the businesses. You bought a business. So take us to like why, like what what made you and your husband want to do that? Um, how's it going buying a business? Like, that's something so fascinating. And then like what's what's next for it?

SPEAKER_01 32:51

Yeah, yeah. So, well, after I left the corporate world and I did a little bit of freelance, like just myself. Um, and then I but I was still looking at that time. I I pretty pretty soon after leaving corporate within that first few months, I was starting to listen to entrepreneur podcasts, read some books, kind of try to understand that path. I was looking into all different kinds of opportunities, like it could be franchises. I looked at like boutique gyms and starting that from the ground up, like opening up a new building and not having a single client from day one. And that was like a little bit different risk that that worried me more than like buying something that's already operating. Um, and then I looked at even like crumble cookies and different like bakeries, just it was just whatever was like for sale in our area because I wanted to be closer to home. I used to travel all over North America for work and that was awesome. And I saw so many cool places and met great business owners and had wonderful customers. And I really enjoyed it until I wanted to be home overnight with my kids, you know?

SPEAKER_02 33:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:57

So I'm okay with traveling around a little bit, but have that having that be my regular work schedule every every week um wasn't really the right balance for me anymore at this phase of life. So I was like, how great would it be to run a business that's local instead of flying all over the country and and Canada too? So that that kind of affected my search. And so yeah, we were looking for probably going on two years, trying to find the right opportunity. And um, this one came about, and some of the criteria that I was factoring in was like ideally someone retiring. So that shows that they've had a longevity of business and they're very experienced, and they can pass that knowledge on to us, um, a certain level of employees. So there's less than 10 employees. I felt like, you know, that was something that I could manage and and that we could do together. So yeah, um it's an engineering consulting, environmental engineering consulting firm. It's called Crane Environmental Services, and their regulations from federal, state, and local that anytime you're doing construction, especially if it's an acre of land or more, you have to have these plans in place to not pollute the soil and the water around. So that's what our company consults on. So giving people plans on the front end and then also inspecting on once constructions are going on. So it could be any kind of construction, commercial, um, you know, state construction, roads, anything. It could be houses, anything. So so yeah, that's what we're in now. And we're about three months in. And yeah, it's it's I'm learning a lot. And it's it's like you just I wouldn't have guessed that this is where I would end up, but I'm so happy that I have and getting to be my own boss and and lead a team and work with my husband as well now. Like it's such a dream, really come true.

SPEAKER_00 35:40

Yeah.

Real Work Life Logistics

SPEAKER_00 35:41

And so how are you managing? I'm just curious, like, I'm gonna use this word that I hate, but I need to find a different word for it. Is this like work-life balance, right? Like, because I truly like laugh at that because I'm like, I don't know what balance means for some. It's different for everybody, what that looks like. So, how do you guys manage that with three kids, a book, a business, you know, working together, taking over? Like, how are you finding still back to that moment where you left that corporate world where you're like, I needed to reflect a little bit? So, how does that balance look for you right now?

SPEAKER_01 36:12

Yeah, that's always such a hot topic because I think no one has the answer. And it's different for everyone. It's so different. And I know like you and your husband have very unique work schedules and balances too, which is probably different than most anyone that you talk to. But um, I'm I'm super glad that my husband and I are into in this together and we're able to balance it the best we can. We're still learning, right? Because we're a few months in. And like when you sign kids up for childcare, it's crazy. It's like a year out sometimes. So, like the child care we thought we wanted when we signed up like a year ago is different than when we buy a business three months ago and have a child five months ago. You know, it's just like ever evolving. But we're very blessed that we have grandparents that are you know within an hour in each direction. So they can help out. We have a great um school that our kids go to for part of the week. And then um the baby we're again between grandparents and ourselves like taking shifts and and making it all work. So it in coming up, we're we're hiring a nanny and different things like that. So it's it's just gonna, it's just continues to evolve.

SPEAKER_00 37:21

Well, as you evolve, and I think that that's the cool thing is like what you know, back to the whole subject of this whole podcast is like as we evolve, we're not an or, we're an and, you know, and what we thought our lives would look like. I mean, I don't know about you, but when I was in my 20s working corporate, I was not expecting my life to be where it's is today, where I am an entrepreneur, like I'm doing all these other things. I mean, heck, you own a business with your husband. How cool and how different.

SPEAKER_01 37:48

I wouldn't have like I wouldn't have guessed that five years ago, right? But then the fact that I mean, but it but it wasn't just a coincidence, you know, like two years ago when I started thinking, like, okay, what's what's next? I like I wrote down all the things that we were targeting and they have all, you know, we found it. So, you know, it's it's just getting clear on where you want to go.

SPEAKER_00 38:10

Yes. Well, and you're making me chuckle a little bit. Yeah, was it it was like two days ago. My husband had just recently got home from a long, like uh being away for a long time for work. And I'm like, all right, let's have a family meeting. Okay, so what's our bucket list still? Are these still the bucket list items that we want to do in our lives? Oh, is this still the budget that we have in place for two years from now? And his face was like, I don't know. And I'm over here, like, you know, entrepreneur, like planning all these things out, thinking through all of these things. But it's so like, I think what I love about that is is that we do come together. I mean, it's probably not his favorite topic. I get really excited. It's like Christmas for me when we can talk about our budgets and our futures. But because he's like, I'm just living for today, right?

SPEAKER_01 38:54

And so I I love a good family meeting. It's like you need those. You got it. But I mean, we're more planning for like we're right now, we're like the week. Like, what's the week look like?

SPEAKER_00 39:04

Are we eating this week? Are we eating out? Like, what are we doing? Yeah, I have on there it's a podcast that we did about a year and a half ago where we talked about family core values, and I'm really excited for that piece of the era of our lives where we can bring our kids involved and say, like, okay, like what are the core values of our family? Like those. I love that.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

I think it's important.

SPEAKER_00 39:23

Yes, it is. I agree. And I think that as I've evolved and back to the and or the or, I'm getting better at understanding, like, I can be both, right? Like, I can be, you know, the one that runs whatever in the household, but also be the entrepreneur during the day. And I didn't really know what that would look like when I had kids, to be uh honest with you. I I didn't know what that meant and how I could switch my brain so quickly from like playing with my son in the morning and getting him ready, getting him to daycare and then working all day and then switching mom back on. But I'm actually having a lot of fun with it, to be honest with you.

SPEAKER_01 40:02

I'm glad because well, I'm glad you at least have it like blocked out like that. Because when we were first shifting into this business, I was telling my husband, like, because the baby was still home most of the time, it's like I'm having a hard time because I'm shifting too much because it's like get up, feed the baby, do a work call, then go, you know, whatever, get him for his nap. You know, it's like it was like too much ping pong. Yes. So I'm like, I need dedicated hours and days and like not bouncing back and forth. Yeah. And then yeah, so we're like we're figuring all that out. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:36

Well, and you don't know until you are in it. That's what I say. Like, I know now it's like, okay, I'm not picking my son up till this time because I got to get all these things done so that when he does come home, I can be present. And then if I need to pick up the laptop at night, I can, but it's like that evolving like space. So

Advice For Women Feeling Stuck

SPEAKER_00 40:52

I guess the question that I would ask you is for advice for women who are feeling stuck, who are feeling like Lauren, I'm going through an identity shift, or I feel like I'm just this and I want to be all of these things. What would you say to them?

SPEAKER_01 41:07

Yeah. Well, I have a part I'll read a that reminds me of a paragraph that I had kind of pulled out here. Please. So in in my in the introduction of my book, I say, when we feel stuck, unhappy, or powerless, there's always another way, another path to choose, another version of ourselves to unlock. So I and I walk through the book, like how I started to find my way again and find my voice and my spark and all of this when I felt like it kind of started to dim and and get too quiet. Um, but I think, yeah, I think women just need to take a little time to breathe. I know it's hard to get it because between work and parenting and all of that, but sometimes you just have to say, like, I need this time each day, either to like take a walk, to journal, to meditate. I think that's really where it comes through. It's like when you have those quiet times and you can reflect and think about like what's working and what's not. So if you're feeling stuck, like you might start to like find those things, like you know, I probably need to, I probably need to get a mentor, or I probably need to get in the gym a couple days a week. You know, it's like there's just certain things and whether it's your health, your business, your whatever, um, I think you'll start to kind of feel which direction to be pulled, but you have to have time to quiet down. Otherwise, it's just thing after thing after thing, and you're not really getting any uh any clarity on what step to take next.

SPEAKER_00 42:29

Yeah, silence is pretty powerful. And many of us don't love the silence because we're not used to it. And so it can be scary, a little bit of like, oh, I'm gonna go silent. What's the brain gonna tell me what to do? But I couldn't agree more with you. And I, as you were talking, I was literally reflecting on a couple of weeks ago. I was pretty emotional. And my mom was up, my husband was still away from for work, and my mom was up, and she goes, just go take a walk. Take the dogs, go for a walk. And I'm like, no, no, no. Like, I I want to spend some time with Lucas and like I gotta do this. And she goes, I got it. Just go. And I remember that moment of I need to do that more. I need to be in charge of telling myself, Lisa, just go for a walk. Lisa, just go to the gym. Like, give yourself that silent because the moment that I do those things, I'm either like I clear up, I get the process out of my head of what's been going on, or the aha comes out that I'm like, oh, oh, there we go. But because we don't stay silent enough, we don't get to hear those things.

SPEAKER_01 43:29

We don't leave the room for the aha moment or like the epiphany of like, ah, that's then it'll click. And it's like, that's what I need to do, or that's what I need to not do. Like whatever. If it's like you've been doing something and you're like, oh, actually that's not working, we're gonna find a different way.

SPEAKER_00 43:46

Yes. I couldn't relate more to that. I love that.

Quickfire Questions And Wrap

SPEAKER_00 43:49

So, okay, kind of going off that, I kind of like end these podcasts with some like quick like things. And so, what would you say out of every facet that you are in your life? What would be your zone of G?

SPEAKER_01 44:04

That's a tough one. Uh gosh. I mean, I I want to say something for work, but I actually love just like some of the time that I get to be with my kids and try to make just like unique memories with them and and and just bring like the values like you were saying, like those family values. Like I want to hand those off to my kids and like just like appreciation of the outdoors and and gratitude and and kindness, like to me, I just love that. I love like passing on those values. So I know that's not like a work answer, but for me, that's like it's it's like a really it feels like a strength of mine.

SPEAKER_00 44:46

Yeah, it feels good. Yes. Okay. So the next question. Um, what is a lesson that life has continued to hand you until you've learned it?

SPEAKER_01 44:57

Yeah, I've got a few of those. But um, I'm gonna give you two. I know I'm probably only supposed to give one, but but um trusting your intuition, like it's just never led me wrong. Like, like I said, the car accident, like I had this feeling like, don't ride with this person, like I just didn't feel right about it. And there's just been many of those over time and in the positive way too, like like doing the book, like, okay, just do it, just go for it even though you're scared, go for it even though you don't know what you're doing, like just trusting that and following it. And the other one is that that we're not alone and that God's always been there for me, even when you're like, where are you in this or why is this happening? It's always when you look back, it's like he was there with me or someone was watching over me and and and I wasn't alone.

SPEAKER_00 45:40

I love those. Oh, I got chills when you were saying that. Um, and then the last one, what's your like walk-up song? Like your if I was to introduce you somewhere, what would you want playing?

SPEAKER_01 45:51

Oh, walk-up song. I've been listening to a lot of Forrest Frank lately, and I'm going to his concert this summer. I'm super excited. We're taking our kids, I think. We'll see if they we got four we got four tickets, not the baby. Um, but actually this morning I was listening to Lemonade. I don't know if you know that song, like Force Frank Lemonade, but it's like listen to it. It's not Beyonce Lemonade, which is different lemonade, but um, it's like it's talking about like life gives like life giving him lemons, but Jesus keeps on making lemonade. Like it's just about whatever gets thrown at you, like making something sweet out of it.

SPEAKER_00 46:25

Well, and I'll just go off of I almost texted you the other day because I don't know if you saw that Forrest Frank was playing at the Houston rodeo.

SPEAKER_01 46:32

No, I don't see anything because I'm on this radio break. Yes, and and and I'll be back whenever this is posted. But um, yeah, I for Lent, I I was off of social media.

SPEAKER_00 46:42

I will tell well, I can't text it. I'll I'll tell like I would just say he sold out seven, what was it, 70,000 people came to his concert at the Houston Rodeo. Do you look on YouTube? I haven't like blocked you too. You can look on YouTube, yes. It is so powerful. So I love that you picked him because I literally thought of you the other day of like, how cool is it that, you know, when you in your you are in your zone of genius, when you are listening, and like you can even tell in a moment for him, I'm gonna go off of your lesson about intuition. You can see in his moment, he's like, Oh, I gotta do this. And he literally just goes to his intuition and he starts to talk to the audience. And you can tell that it was like, I didn't plan this. Yeah, but like I'm gonna go there. And I think that that is something that I love for people is when I get to watch them like, I wasn't planning on this, but I feel this nudge and I'm just gonna go for it.

SPEAKER_01 47:29

Yeah, yeah, I love that. And you know what's funny? I would have like five, 10 years ago, probably gave you like a rap song, and that just shows like how much you changed and evolved, and now I like like bump my Jeep stereo up with like, you know, worship music. But it's just, I mean, that's like my vibe nowadays.

SPEAKER_00 47:46

Yes, I love that. I love that. I know we always joke like, oh, what are we gonna tell our kids that we listen to, or what are our kids gonna know?

SPEAKER_01 47:52

But I was like, I was working out in our basement. We have a gym, and then the kids also play down there, and like I was trying to work out without them, but that's just not a thing. So then they were like coming over. I was like, fine, I'll just turn my music on and we can all, you know, do this. And I was like trying to find clean versions of like some of these songs I used to like like get pumped up to to play basketball or whatever when I was younger. And I was like, there's like these some of these are pretty bad. I probably shouldn't maybe have my kids listen to.

SPEAKER_00 48:16

Yes, or you listen to the lyrics and you're like, oh, I sang that out loud. I can't believe I know, and like the sixth grade, it's like, oh exactly, exactly. Well, Lauren, thank you so much for being on the confident podcast. It was so much fun chatting with you. I feel about like so many things. I we probably could have talked for another 30 minutes on things, but I just really appreciate, you know, the multifacets and the journey that you've taken to get to where you are today. And just think about like what the next 10 years is gonna bring you, which is pretty cool.

SPEAKER_01 48:43

Yeah, I'm super excited. It's always a it's always an adventure with the business and and lots of kids. And and I know you're balancing so many things too. So I wish you all the best. And it's been so great to connect and and support each other.

SPEAKER_00 48:57

Yes, absolutely. Thank you everybody for tuning in. All right, thank you all for tuning in for today's podcast. I had so much fun talking to Lauren about the multifacets of her life from you know, when we were in the corporate world, what she learned about taking that leap to trust herself, the intuition that she had, different pieces of her book. If you haven't checked it out, I'm gonna put this link in the bio. All the girls I was before. It was an amazing book. I really resonated with it. Um, like I shared earlier on the podcast, I really love that you could just kind of open it and pick out pages in which you're like, oh yeah, I want to read this chapter. I read it front to back. And then afterwards, I was thinking about that, how cool it was that she created something that someone could just pick up on the chapters. Um, and then we also talk about taking that leap of owning a business with your with your husband. And I think what I loved about her journey is she said it great when you know the spiral, like, you know, finding your voice, trusting your intuition, um, knowing that you're not alone. And all of these things are really important when it comes to your confidence. So if you love today's episode, which I hope that you all take away some incredible things, I even just enjoyed talking to Lauren just in general. Um, but you know, subscribe to our channel, let me know what you think, and please share with someone that you know might be going through something that could really use this today. Again, as I say on every podcast, continue to spread love and kindness to everybody that you meet. And have a great day. Thank you for joining me on this episode of the Confident Podcast. If today's episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear about it. So send me a message at podcast.lisa Turkington.com. Don't forget, while you're there, to subscribe to our newsletter, subscribe to our YouTube channel. And don't forget to spread the good by sharing this with someone in your life. Remember, you have the power to choose confidence every single day. Keep showing up, keep striving, and keep believing in your potential. I'm cheering you on, and I'll see you next time.