Flow versus Force: What happened when I didn't take my own medicine

Following our intuition rather than external "shoulds" creates greater alignment, flow, and success, especially for those with unique neurocomplex and astrological configurations.

Taking a hiatus from content creation led to unexpected growth, ancestral insights, and clarity about working with practitioners who are experiencing post-awakening professional evolution.

In this episode, I touch upon:

• The danger of operating from "shoulds" rather than intuitive flow
• Four levels of consciousness: victim, by me, through me, and collective
• Scientific research on highly sensitive people and vantage sensitivity
• Connecting with nature led to profound spiritual experiences
• Discovering repeating astrological patterns across maternal ancestry
• Why practitioners with "alien patterns" need continuous evolution
• The importance of working with your design rather than against it
• Flow creates better results than force, even when it seems illogical

If you've been feeling the push-pull between following your intuitive breadcrumbs and conforming to conventional business wisdom, this episode offers validation and a path forward. For those with what I call "alien patterns" in their charts, or hard Pluto aspects, continuous evolution isn't optional; it's essential.

If you'd like to discover whether you have these significant astrological patterns, grab the free Chart Your Power kit in links below. 

For practitioners who feel their work hasn't caught up with their personal evolution, the Clarity Lab helps you align your work with your evolved self.

Chapters

• 0:00 Taking a break and reconnecting
• 10:05 The shoulds versus intuition battle
• 19:35 Four levels of consciousness explained
• 26:20 Connecting with nature and ancestors
• 37:15 Discovering ancestral astrological patterns
• 47:28 Finding alignment as a practitioner
• 55:30 Working with your unique design

Transcript

Speaker 1: 1:05

Hi there, welcome back. If you haven't noticed, I haven't been around for a little while. I took a little break from recording my podcast episodes and there's quite a number of reasons for that, so I'm going to share a few of those reasons today, and I'm also going to share with you why I didn't listen to my own advice and why that pertains to why I needed to take some time off from recording podcast episodes. So at the beginning of the season, I shared with you a story about how I had gone through a breakthrough in 2024. And, as I mentioned earlier in the season, it ended up leading me to dozens of PubMed rabbit holes looking at scientific research, and it led me to sitting down and collecting all the years of scientific research that I've been collecting, putting it all together and what it meant for me now and for my clients in terms of the scientific evidence that proved why my work works the way that it does. And you know, at the beginning of the season I talked about some details about being a highly sensitive person, being gifted, being neurodivergent or neurocomplex, and what the science says about those of us who are wired this way and how we do. It's not just a nice to have. It's the thing that will unlock that higher level of thriving and flourishing that we are actually capable of when it comes to accessing and leveraging vantage sensitivity. And then, after I put a whole bunch of that scientific research together to explain things from a scientific point of view, I ended up doing what I now see as a pattern that I commonly tend to do is, once I come up with another level of insight with the science, then I start to lean into the other side of things, the energetic side of things, the spiritual side of things, because I value both and I believe that it's both of them together that create deeper insight and bigger results.

Speaker 1: 3:44

And so you noticed in the podcast and if you've been following me on social media, one of the things that I started talking about was the common patterns that I've been seeing over the past few years in my astrology charts and my clients' astrology charts, because there's some really important deep and intense patterns in our charts that are showing up over and over and over and over again that are not considered common in the general population, and so there's something to this, and I put together a guidebook and some audio trainings to help you understand if you do have these patterns and what they mean in terms of your purpose, your leadership, the direction that you're really supposed to be going in this lifetime with your work, the impact that you're really supposed to be going in this lifetime with your work, the impact that you're actually here to be making, both for yourself and for the collective. And if you haven't listened to the podcast episodes about that or grabbed the guidebook in the Chart your Power kit, you can access that in the show notes. It's free, and I've gotten lots of feedback from people telling me how helpful it was to identify these patterns in their charts. Those people who are highly sensitive, deep thinking, driven for more, driven for growth and evolution that the things that I've shared about these patterns have explained so much about their lives helped them understand themselves to a degree where it's like it's given them permission to be themselves, because these are the parts that either they didn't have words for or that they didn't fully understand, weren't giving themselves credit for and didn't know that. These are actually the things to leverage and lead with so that they can actually be really enjoying what they do, really enjoying living their lives and really making that meaningful impact that they know that they're here to make. Leaning in on these aspects of themselves is one of the important puzzle pieces that will enable you to do that and access it more deeply, more efficiently and more sustainably than ever.

Speaker 1: 5:57

So as I was putting all these puzzle pieces together, connecting all these dots, there came a point around late winter, after I had taken a hiatus from social media to take the time to assimilate all this information, some part of me was telling me you need to go back onto social media, you need to start posting again, you need to start making podcasts again. And there was another part of me that was resistant, who was saying you still need a little bit more time. There's still more to put together here. However, the shoulds inside my head won, and this is where I did not take my own medicine. I have a great podcast episode from 2024 that talks about how to determine if whoever is talking is your intuition or some protective part or something else, and I know this and I know the parts within me, and I still didn't follow my own advice, and I see now that that should voice that was telling me you need to get back on things. You need to go start posting again. That was not my intuition, that was not my inner knowing, that was a piece of me that was operating from shoulds, from fear, from feeling like, if I don't keep up with everybody else, I'm going to fall behind, and something that I often say when someone finds themselves falling back into old ways. I had to ask myself so how's that working for you? Not so well.

Speaker 1: 7:34

So, when I had taken my hiatus and I wasn't posting on social media, I had an initial worry that my income would dry up, that people wouldn't show up in my world because I wasn't actively marketing, I wasn't actively posting, I wasn't actively involved in the community. And the opposite is true. When I started to do my deep dives and following my passions and following what was really bringing me joy, income showed up for me in ways I would have never expected. I was financially taken care of during that time, which, in hindsight, makes no sense why I was shooting myself to go back online to start posting again. If that was the case, however, we are all human and sometimes those shoulds win out.

Speaker 1: 8:25

So can you guess what happened when I started forcing myself to go back into posting, going back online, forcing myself to keep up with everybody else because everyone else has gone back to posting after the holidays. You've taken long enough time to get back into it. You got to go. Do do, do. Guess what happened. The opposite of what I wanted to go. Do do, do, guess what happened. The opposite of what I wanted. All of a sudden, all the income that was coming out of the woodwork stopped. All of a sudden, everything started to feel hard. All of a sudden, it felt like I was banging my head against the wall and wondering why things that were working before all of a sudden were no longer working. And, of course, hindsight is always 20-20. It was because I was forcing myself to should, I was not in flow, and I can see that now.

Speaker 1: 9:23

So this is part of the lesson here that for me to share with you in this episode is the importance of following your joy, following your curiosity, following meaning and purpose. And when you are in your flow, then that's when the things come to you, instead of chasing them or forcing them or shooting things to happen, because when you do those things, usually the things that you're wanting to happen won't work out the way that you want them to or expect, and this is kind of like the analogy that I've often used of chasing the cat. So the analogy goes like this If you want to pet a cat, what happens? If you try to chase it down to pet it? It's going to run away from you. And what happens when you sit back and relax? You're doing your thing. That's when the cat is going to come to you for attention. You're not trying, you're not forcing. The more chill you are, the more the cat is going to come to you. And as I say this, my cat right now is just jumping up on the little cat bed that I have for her on my desk beside me. Oh the irony. So here I was, trying to force things to happen, shutting myself back into doing.

Speaker 1: 10:45

Months prior I had registered for an upcoming course and the course was delivered by a beautiful soul. Her name is Doctora Rosales Meza. She's a licensed therapist who turned medicine woman when she went back to her Inca lineage. And this course that I took was a course that was guiding us to remember that our truth comes when we slow down. She was guiding us to connect with ourselves, connect with Mother Earth and to connect with our ancestors, to remember a different way of being, other than just doing that social hegemonic narrative that so many of us have bought into in push, hustle and force culture that has been highly rewarded and highly prized right the more that you do, the better you are.

Speaker 1: 11:39

And that narrative comes from level two consciousness, by me consciousness, and there's four levels of consciousness. The first level of consciousness is to me consciousness, or victim consciousness, when we feel like we don't have any power and everything is happening to us. And level two consciousness is important because it takes us out of the victim consciousness, because everyone starts at level one and the issue is is if we stay there long term, ongoing, we all have moments where we are flick back into level one consciousness and the level two consciousness helps get us out of level one so we're not stuck there. And level two consciousness is by me consciousness, since this is when we discover that our actions can change our outcomes and it empowers us to take personal responsibility, our outcomes. And it empowers us to take personal responsibility. It empowers us to know that if we take action, that we can impact our reality and our outcomes, and that's important.

Speaker 1: 12:40

And there's a limit to that, because any one of us only ever has so much time, energy or focus and so many people will end up hitting a wall at some point where they have no more time, no more energy, no more focus. Oftentimes this leads to burnout and, if you think about it, this is the epitome of hustle culture. It's all about doing, doing more, doing more when, in reality, there's two more levels of consciousness to access, and oftentimes, when someone hits burnout, that's usually when they will recognize that something's got to give. I can't continue on this way, and if they choose to look more deeply, they will start to discover level three, consciousness, which is through me. Through me consciousness is like being in flow state.

Speaker 1: 13:29

Instead of trying to paddle upstream against whitewater rapids currents, you stop trying to force yourself to go against the current and allow the current to move you. You step into flow. In Taoism, they refer to this as wu-wei, which means effortless action. Not trying to paddle against the current doesn't mean that you don't do anything at all. It doesn't mean that you just lift your hands in the air and go. Well, I'm just going to then relax and see what happens. It's about finding your own personal flow, following your own personal breadcrumbs, which are the things that light you up, following your curiosity, following your sense of meaning and purpose and interest, the things that you're passionate about, and doing things in a way that works for you, not just trying to force yourself to do things because that's just what everybody else does, or that's the way it works, or that's the way other people are doing it.

Speaker 1: 14:35

Flow state has been measured in the scientific research. Especially for those of us who are highly sensitive or neurocomplex, there's a couple of things that we need to establish in order to access flow state, one of them being having a sense of safety within us. If we don't feel safe, we're not going to access flow, and one of the reasons for that is because, in order to access flow state, there's a certain part of the prefrontal cortex in our brain that needs to quiet down, and this part of the brain is highly active when we are overthinking and, for those of us who are highly sensitive, overthinking tends to be a familiar coping behavior to try to feel in control of things that we don't feel in control of, in essence, to try to feel safe. So we overthink, we overanalyze, we over intellectualize, we stay up in our heads, and I know that I have been guilty of this so many times for so many years in my life. And that's the thing so many of us who are highly sensitive, deep thinking, highly sensitive, deep thinking, driven, purposeful people oftentimes our intellect was the thing that we were prized for, we were the ones who could figure things out, and that's what we became known for, praised for, appreciated for Something where, if we identify with that part of ourselves, it can be difficult to let go of that part of ourselves. And if we do tend to overthink which I have done for so many years usually it's because we don't feel safe within ourselves for one reason or another and we're trying to feel in control of something that we don't feel in control of. And the thing is is control is an illusion that we don't feel in control of. And the thing is, is control is an illusion, which I'll talk about in another episode.

Speaker 1: 16:33

The point being, through all of this is many of us may struggle to stay in level three flow state through me consciousness because of this over identification with our intellect, or because we have this tendency to be up in our heads or overthink or overanalyze in order to try to find some sense of safety, and that prevents us from actually experiencing what we want to experience. And what happened with me. Late winter is a really great example of this. I got up in my head and I allowed that should part of me to speak more loudly than my intuition. I allowed that overthinking part of me to take over instead of following the breadcrumbs and operating from flow, and it kicked me right back out into level two, consciousness of do, do, do, do, do, and when that happens, things that were flowing no longer flow. And then there's level four consciousness, and that's that collective consciousness, that oneness consciousness is understanding that we are all connected, and the concept of no non duality. There is no good or bad, there is no right or wrong, everything just is. Any belief otherwise is based more on our human tendency to put judgment on things based on narratives, based on conditioning, based on past experiences and the meanings that we put to those experiences, based on past experiences and the meanings that we put to those experiences. And me, shooting on myself was a judgment based on past experiences, based on conditioning for my past, and that kicked me out of all of those higher levels of consciousness too. So back to the story that I was initially trying to share here.

Speaker 1: 18:28

I took this wonderful program led by Dr Rosales Meza I hope I'm pronouncing her name correctly. So I'm taking this program and she is reminding us of the importance of slowing down and connecting to ourselves, to Mother Earth, to our ancestors. Now, I've taken courses in the past from various schools of thought, from various medicine people, from various different lineages. I find it very important to learn many different perspectives and ways of thinking and ways of being, and there were many things that she was teaching that I had already learned to do and had been practicing, and things that I, in my rush to force what I thought I should be doing, I stopped doing, the irony of it. So this was a wonderful reminder to go back to those practices and make some adjustments according to her suggestions. According to her suggestions, one of the homework was to connect with Mother Earth through connection to nature.

Speaker 1: 19:36

I started returning to my practice of connecting with trees, because, for some reason, trees call to me. They always have and so I started reconnecting with the trees and speaking to them. When I started to do this, the tree started speaking back, and at first I didn't believe it. I wondered if I was imagining things. Maybe that was just my imagination, and then I started noticing what my dog was doing when I started doing this.

Speaker 1: 20:07

So my dog is an Alaskan Husky. She's a sled dog. She has a lot of sight hound bred into her, and so this all means that she has a ton of energy. She needs to run long, fast. She does not stay in one place for very long. Whenever we go on walks, she needs to be constantly moving, and I need to be constantly moving with her. And if I stop to say, for example, record a video or type out some thought that I had had to put in my notes for later, she's not sticking around. She starts, she runs off and goes somewhere, and usually she goes off to cause some sort of trouble. But when I stop to connect to the trees and I start talking to them and they're talking back, she doesn't leave my side. It's like she's standing guard for me. She does not run off, and it's happened enough times now that I know that this is not coincidence, and so I've been trusting that process.

Speaker 1: 21:07

I've been listening in and I've had the privilege to hear numerous stories that the trees have to share. Some are so beautiful that my heart cracked wide open, and some of these stories have been so heartbreaking that it moved me to tears. This can't all just be part of my imagination. There's something here and then one day, doing this practice, my mother's spirit appeared, and I wasn't expecting it and I wasn't looking for that and I fully welcomed it. After that moment, everything changed.

Speaker 1: 21:41

After that moment, I was reminded of why I'm here. I was reminded that fulfilling my purpose isn't going to come through trying to force things to happen. I was reminded that things will naturally unfold when I surrender to the flow and follow my breadcrumbs. And then, shortly after that, dr Meza later confirmed in one of her teachings about following your purpose that we don't get the full picture right away. We only start with a little glimmer and the more we walk towards it and the more we trust it and lean into it, the more that's revealed, the more it opens up. We don't see the whole thing right away and we can't force that clarity. We can't force it to happen. It's about trusting the process, and I mean, I already know this to be true. It's part of the recalibration work I guide my clients through right, not to push harder but to show up deeper in alignment, in flow, in presence, with focused intention, and I wasn't following my own medicine.

Speaker 1: 22:48

Now, since that moment in the woods I have been reconnecting to my flow and I have been following the intuitive breadcrumbs again, and one of those breadcrumbs led me to pick up a project that I had put to the side because I had been telling myself that I didn't have the time to do this project. Can you see where this is going? So that project was looking at my ancestral lineage. A number of years ago I ended up going into some rabbit holes on ancestryca and all kinds of other pages and I was connecting dots and I started to put together some things and I knew instinctively that there was something important for me to uncover by looking at my lineage. I didn't know what it was, I just knew that I needed to go deeper. And then the shoulds got ahead of me and said no, you don't have time for this, you can do this later. So I'd actually put that project on hold for probably a couple of years and then, after all this had happened in the woods and connected with my mother's spirit, something told me to pick this project up again and once I did, there was something inside me that said go look at their astrology charts. And my mind was blown.

Speaker 1: 24:14

So all those astrology placements, configurations, patterns that I've been telling you about, that I've been seeing over and over and over my clients. You know, those ones that are not considered common in the general population, right? The alien patterns, those hard Pluto placements, like all the things that are in that guidebook. Yeah, so every single one of my mother's ancestors, as well as her chart and my chart, have them. It's too regular to be considered a coincidence. And there's some other repeating patterns that I'm seeing that I believe mean something important. I know they mean something important. I'm not going to tell you about all of them right now, because I want to get more certain by creating a database so that I can use the scientific method to determine the validity of what I'm observing and making sure it's statistically significant. However, I've seen enough now to know that it is.

Speaker 1: 25:14

Now here's the thing the more I started diving into this project which, by the way, it's been taking me into rabbit holes where I end up spending hours of my free time focusing on this rather than all the other stuff that I quote unquote should be doing for my business the more I'm noticing my flow returning even more than before, and I'm seeing my income returning as well, just as it had in the winter, when I was on that hiatus, when I wasn't on social media and I was following my intuition and focusing on what lit me up the most, and income came out of the woodwork in ways that didn't logically seem possible. And as I dive deeper into this passion project and I trust the process more and more is being revealed to me, piece by piece at a time I'm seeing associations, I'm understanding certain associations better and I keep stumbling across new layers of information that connect even more dots, that make the bigger picture even clearer than ever. And not just about me understanding my ancestry, not just me understanding astrology patterns more and understanding the specific configurations about mine and my clients charts more, because what I've pieced together is it's blowing my mind and it's blowing my clients minds more than ever, as I'm sharing what I'm piecing together. But I'm also seeing how this is actually a piece of a larger system that has always been in me, that I've already started creating over the course of my career, and it was like another puzzle piece of the system that I have been creating, like clicked into place.

Speaker 1: 27:06

This system that I've been creating and putting together and growing and refining and expanding as I'm expanding and evolving is not just a system that I use with my clients to guide them through this journey of moving through an evolution into the next level of themselves and then aligning their work so that their work catches up with their evolved self and aligns with what their sole purpose knows is here to fulfill in their lifetime. I can also see how this is also a system that my clients can use with the people that they're here to lead and guide, especially my clients who are practitioners, like I've been, and that's another piece of the puzzle that's been getting clearer for me because, as I've been stepping into this flow, I'm being led to connect with certain people and have conversations with certain people that have helped me get even clearer for myself about my own work and who I'm here to guide now, because I've been going through my own evolution and you know this from all the different episodes that I've been sharing over the past year and a half about all the different iterations of myself, the deep inner work that I've been doing, the pivots that I've been making with my business, with my niche, with my focus on who I'm helping the how has always been the same and it keeps growing and expanding and who I'm here to help has been evolving, as I've been evolving and I've been going through another level of my evolution since I had that breakthrough in 2024. In real time, I'm catching my own work up to this level of my own evolution. I know this is part of the work that's important for me and it's a piece of the work that I guide my own clients through.

Speaker 1: 29:06

I've done this for a number of years now with professionals, with entrepreneurs, with leaders in a variety of different professions, including practitioners and coaches and healers, and I've never really had a focus directly on working with practitioners who are like me. And what I've noticed recently is I've been having some of these conversations with friends and colleagues and, as I've been having these conversations with these beautiful souls, I'm hearing them tell me their stories about their professional journey, since they've been doing their own inner growth work and awakening work, and everything that they're telling me sounds exactly like my story and the things that I went through four, five, six, seven years ago. With every single one of these conversations it's like I'm just a few years ahead of them on this journey and I see now that A there's a lot of people out there that guide people through the initial stages of inner awareness, self-awareness, inner healing, and that's necessary and important. Self-awareness, inner healing, and that's necessary and important. There's a lot of people out there that will guide people through an inner awakening, and there's fewer people that guide people through okay, well, now I've awakened, now what? And fewer people that guide people through okay, I've gone through this awakening and I'm evolving. I'm not who I used to be and I'm not fully become who I know that I'm here to be, and there's a lot of people who have told me that they understand the theory of how to continue this evolution and how to continue navigating these next stages after awakening. However, intellectually understanding something and actually knowing how to implement it are two different things, and I know that one of my gifts is being able to guide somebody through that and help them understand the how and drop into the level of being, instead of just knowing and doing.

Speaker 1: 31:29

So here's the thing over the years since around 2021, there's been this inner drive within me to put together some sort of programming for practitioners who are like me but maybe a few steps behind, and in the past, the only way that I could see that was to create some sort of certification program for them to teach them the deeper levels of the modalities and the ways of guiding someone more deeply than what our professional skills taught us right that deeper work and guiding them through the deeper work themselves so that they can be the guide through example, guiding people through what they went through and then teaching them how to guide others through what they went through. And that was the only way I was able to see that option of putting together something for practitioners. And every time that I would sit down and try to plan it, it would start flowing and I would put down the structure and I would create the programming and I would be like, yeah, this is amazing, and I would get to this point where I would hit this wall and it would just stop flowing. And I realize now that the reason why is because, a it wasn't meant to be birthed yet and, b the way I was trying to make it happen wasn't the angle, it wasn't the way that I'm actually destined to do it. I was trying to force it to happen more quickly than it was supposed to unfold. I still had some things that I needed to evolve through, and so I would get to this point of planning and things would start to flow, and then it was like the inspiration stopped and then, instead of operating from flow in my programming and planning, I was operating from pushing should let's get this done, come on. And once I started using my overthinking brain instead of my flow-based brain, that's when the project would stop, and this happened to me at least three times. So again, another lesson in when you operate from the shoulds instead of the flow. This is what happens.

Speaker 1: 33:44

And since I found my way back to my flow again over the course of this past spring and having these beautiful and rich conversations with other practitioners, colleagues and friends, and hearing these stories that mirrored my own and I'm just a couple steps ahead of them and I figured out some important things that they're trying to figure out now, I can see that, yes, that inner instinct that kept telling me that I am here to work with other practitioners, I can see that instinct now is true, and the way I was trying to force it to happen and the direction and angle that I thought that it should happen because that's what I've seen modeled to me in the industry is not actually the way that's aligned for me, and I mean all of this makes sense because I'm not here to do it like everybody else. Neither are my clients, and my astrology chart shows that to be true. So many of my placements that I have in my chart point to the fact that I am here to do it differently. I am here to disrupt systems in order to create things that are more aligned for me and in order to create possibilities for others that are more aligned for them, and I can't disrupt systems if I'm trying to fit myself into them. It's impossible.

Speaker 1: 35:10

Again, I wasn't following my own medicine and then, through all of this, something told me to go back and check my notes from a few years ago, when I was working with an astrologer, to better understand my astrology patterns, the ones that not all astrologers talk about, like my alien patterns. For example, I have Pluto, which is the same degree as my moon and seven degrees from my sun. That gives me two alien patterns that involve Pluto. And again, just as a reminder, alien patterns don't mean that you're an alien. It means that the energy from an outer planet is so close to your sun moon or rising sign that your identity, how you feel and how other people see you is different from the other people around you because of that influence of that outer planet literally makes you think and feel differently and so you kind of feel like an alien. You feel alienated, hence the name.

Speaker 1: 36:12

So many of my clients also have alien patterns and when I explain alien patterns to them, or if they've heard the audio lessons that I've spoken about alien patterns, which you can find in the podcast earlier in season two, they tell me over and over again how much it explained why they felt so different for all of their lives, explained it more than anything else, even if they've gotten a diagnosis of autism, adhd, high sensitivity, neurodiversity, giftedness, all of these things. For myself as well, understanding neurodiversity, neurocomplexity, neurodivergence, high sensitivity absolutely helped me better understand myself to a degree and understanding these alien patterns. So I worked with an astrologer for at least six months to understand these patterns about myself, especially the alien patterns. I specifically found an astrologer who has had a number of years of experience and knowledge with alien patterns specifically. He's even created a course that he used to teach on alien patterns, and I'm looking through these notes and one of the things that he told me is that those of us who have Pluto alien patterns especially when we have multiple Pluto alien patterns, are here to guide others with alien patterns to be able to master their own alien patterns and the gifts that are associated with them and the powers that are associated with them. And as I'm looking through these notes and I've had these conversations, which have all unfolded since I reconnected to my flow and my passion projects, it was like this bell went off in my head like ding, ding, ding. Of course that makes sense why my clients, over and over again, have alien patterns. That's who I'm here to guide and lead to master the gifts that are associated with these intense astrology placements. And I've mentioned in that previous episode about alien patterns that there are specific gifts and powers and abilities that come with these particular placements, as well as some challenges.

Speaker 1: 38:41

We kind of act like karmic mirrors and the flavor of what it is that we are mirroring back to the people around us depends on the energy of the specific planet involved in that alien pattern, right? So somebody who has Pluto is going to have a different flavor of what they are reflecting back to people than someone who has Neptune, for example. So Pluto is all about deep down excavation, bringing up all the repressed and suppressed shame to the surface so that you can clear it, so that you can move up another level of consciousness in your transformation. And so I know one of the things that I do is, when I'm working with a client is helping them see where they might be still repressing some things that might be associated with shameful emotions, so that they can clear it, and doing it in a way where it doesn't feel like it's like you're dredging in the shame. It's more an empowering process of transmuting it so that you can continue your evolution and transformation.

Speaker 1: 39:48

And that's different than somebody who has say, for example, neptune, their ability and their flavor, that they're mirroring back in people is the fullest potential of who they are and their deepest creative gifts and abilities, and helping them understand how to love themselves through reflecting that person's highest potential back to them so that they can see it clearly right. So can you see, both of us are involved in transforming people through mirroring back something about that other person to them. But what we're mirroring back is slightly different depending on which planet is involved in the alien pattern and, as I've said in the podcast episode before, because we are these karmic mirrors, even if we don't say a word, even if we are not working with somebody, even if we are not using our professional skills. This is happening in the background when we're connecting with somebody, and some people are not looking for someone to mirror back to them what they don't want to see. Some people don't want to see unprocessed and repressed shame so that they can transform it, and some people don't want to have their highest potential mirrored back to them because that could feel triggering. If they don't want to look at it, or if they don't believe that they can access it, or if that's just not what they want, those people are going to get triggered. Or people are going to get triggered, or they're going to get upset, or they're going to feel uncomfortable. They're not going to like it and it's going to cause some level of discomfort, either in them or in you, or both. And for the person who is looking for that and that's the exact thing that they want and they need in order to catalyze and continue their transformation it's going to change their lives in ways that are probably going to blow both of your minds, and this is why it's so important to understand the power of these patterns and how to use them, how to leverage them and how to direct them in ways that are going to be to the benefit of everybody, because sometimes, if we don't understand these patterns A we can't use them to the fullest of their potential. B sometimes it means that we might be actually focusing them on the wrong people and that can just cause everyone to feel triggered. C sometimes, if we don't understand what's actually going on, we can direct the power of these patterns in ways that are actually harmful. We might project what we don't want to accept about ourselves onto other people.

Speaker 1: 42:24

And this is something that came to me as I've been observing my own family line and looking at my maternal line and all of these patterns that keep repeating over and over again. And what I know about my mother's family and all of these patterns that keep repeating over and over again, and what I know about my mother's family and my mother and my mother's mother and my mother's mother's mother, is that when you don't understand the power of these patterns and you don't own them, you don't accept them, you try to hide them away, you try to repress them, you try to avoid them, you end up projecting onto other people in ways that can be unhealthy, that can be toxic, that can be harmful, and that's what I've seen in my family line, and I see I have had the privilege to be able to do this inner work. I think this goes to be true for so many of us our previous generations, our parents, our parents, parents. The farther back you go, the less opportunity those people had to be able to do this inner work, to heal the wounds, to break the cycles, to create new ways of being that are based on wholeness, that are based on who you are, not who you think that you should be, in order to survive, in order to fit in, in order to be accepted, in order to belong, in order to avoid other people from reacting negatively to you. And these have been cycles, especially for those of us who are deep and highly sensitive and experience life the way that we do, especially when you have an alien pattern. It can be confusing, it can be hurtful, and oftentimes we try to do whatever we think that we need to do in order to prevent all of these intense, triggering experiences with other people. And this is the thing myself and the people that I work with now. We've done enough self-awareness work, self-inquiry work, inner healing work to understand that that cycle is not a healthy one to continue. We've done enough of the work now to break out of many of those survival patterns that we used to engage in in order to try to protect ourselves and keep ourselves safe.

Speaker 1: 44:43

Right, the people pleasing, the masking ourselves, the contorting ourselves, trying to be who we think we need to be in order to keep people happy, in order to prevent people from reacting to us, in order to be accepted. And that also included the career choices that we made, the career paths that we took, the niche that we chose, how we decided to work with people. Right, I know for myself that's been the case. It's one of the reasons why I spent so many years working as a general clinician as opposed to actually listening to that inner intuition that said, no, there's something deeper here for you to be following, other than treating colds and back pain. Right. And it's the reason why I chose a safe niche when I finally did decide to leave general clinical practice and go online with my work, and I ended up choosing perimenopausal weight loss because it's a popular niche, it's a safe niche, and I did not enjoy it one bit. I had to learn the hard way and I'm also seeing over and over and over again.

Speaker 1: 45:46

So many of my friends and colleagues who are built like me, who have charts like me. Every single time I've been speaking with someone lately who is a practitioner and when they show me their charts and they have an alien pattern especially if they have an alien pattern and a prominent Pluto pattern I keep hearing the same thing. They know, they're good at what they do, they have expertise, they have more than enough knowledge and training and certifications and something's still missing. Usually they've gone through some inner journey. Usually some event has sparked the inner journey, right Whether it's been some crisis in their life, whether that be a health crisis or relationship or death of a loved one or something of that nature. Or there's also been quite a number of my friends and colleagues who the pandemic was the thing that broke them open. It was the thing that was the needle mover that pushed them into this next level of their inner evolution journey. And I've seen that not only with practitioners I hear this over and over again whenever I'm talking to people is the pandemic has been a big thing for a lot of people who, if they had not already had some sort of moment, that was kind of like the straw that broke the camel's back, that sent them into some sort of inner healing, self awareness journey, evolution journey, rebirth journey. The pandemic was the thing for them and for me. I had been pushed into this journey four years prior to the pandemic and I also see to be true.

Speaker 1: 47:23

With these particular patterns, especially alien patterns, and then hard Pluto placement patterns right so, like if your Pluto is an aspect either right, beside or opposite, or square, your sun or your moon, especially these are intense placements that cause you to feel like you continually need to learn, grow and evolve. You can't not, you can't put a lid on that and not everybody understands this. I've worked with many coaches and mentors myself, me as the client, not all but some of these coaches. They don't understand this need to continue to grow and evolve and they just say just pick something and stay there and don't change. And like that's the worst freaking advice that you can give somebody with alien patterns and Pluto placements is to just pick something and stay there and don't change. Like you can't.

Speaker 1: 48:26

It's like when I worked with that astrologer understanding my astrology placements and the alien patterns, he gave me this analogy having an alien pattern and having deep Pluto placements is kind of like having a high energy dog, and I can see this to be true with my Alaskan Husky. If you take this high energy dog so if I took my Alaskan Husky and I locked it in a small room and I did not let it out to run what's going to happen? It's going to destroy the room from the inside. And it's kind of like telling somebody with these patterns don't continue to learn and grow and evolve, stay where you are, just don't change. You can't do that Because what's going to happen? You're going to destroy yourself from the inside. And that's exactly what happened to me.

Speaker 1: 49:19

I've learned the hard way that, first of all, looking to other people for the answer is not the answer. Second of all, not everyone's going to understand how I'm designed and how I need to actually operate in order to work with my design, because not everyone is built like me. We are part of a minority, so I can't expect people who aren't part of this minority to understand how this works and trying to follow the neuro normative approaches from people who are not built like this, who don't understand this, and they're saying well, you just should be doing this, just stay the way you are and don't change. For example, if I continued to force myself to do that because that's what this particular business coach told me is the way that you need to go in order for business success, if I continue to force myself to do that, I would have only continued to destroy myself from the inside. That wasn't going to give me any type of success that was long-term, sustainable and beneficial for me.

Speaker 1: 50:26

And then going back to the science that I've pieced together about being a highly sensitive, gifted or neurocomplex, and if you take that information and now put it towards somebody who has these astrological placements, you need to work with your design. You need to work with supporting your own needs in a positively supportive way. That's how you leverage vantage sensitivity. That's how you can flourish. And if you don't do these things, the studies also show that you are going to function significantly less. Your function is going to decrease if you work against yourself.

Speaker 1: 51:05

Right, it's not just a nice to have to understand how you operate and work with, how you're designed, because if you don't do these things, you're doing yourself a disservice and you are doing the collective a disservice, because you cannot work to the fullest potential of your capabilities. Science proves this to be true, and that means that you are unable to help the people that you know that you are here and destined to lead to achieve their full potential because you're not operating at yours, and when you work against yourself, it dilutes your gifts. You have less and less access to the gifts that make you unique over and above your professional skills and studies show that to be true as well. Access to things like creativity and intuitiveness, pattern recognition, innovative thinking all of these things are gifts that are associated with these unique designs, and the more you work against yourself, the more you try to force yourself, push, hustle, follow those shoulds instead of following meaning and purpose and curiosity. You kick yourself out of flow state and your access to these gifts declines significantly. And these are the gifts that will enable the work that you do with other people to amplify their results far beyond what your professional skills alone can deliver, and I've seen this to be true as well Over and over again since I've been doing this type of work.

Speaker 1: 52:44

The results that my clients get are far beyond anything I've witnessed when I was a clinical naturopathic doctor. Clinical skills absolutely help. I'm not saying that I didn't help my patients when I was a naturopathic doctor. Clinical skills absolutely help. I'm not saying that I didn't help my patients when I was a naturopathic doctor, because I know that I did. Their health improved. People were able to recover, they were no longer bogged down by symptoms that they had been before, and I can see now just how much more there is beyond getting over symptoms and being functional. There's a whole other paradigm beyond that, and when you know, you know.

Speaker 1: 53:24

So I wanted to share this story today because it's been a while since I've been here on the podcast and while I knew I needed to give myself permission to be with myself, be in my passion, follow the breadcrumbs, I needed some time to put some more pieces of the puzzle together before I came back here. I also wanted to show up and give you an update of where I am and share an important lesson that I was reminded of along the way that I think will benefit you as well. So again, shutting yourself just makes a big mess. I was reminded of that earlier this year and again a reminder while sometimes it doesn't always make logical sense, the key to your flow, greater success and having things work more efficiently and better, more aligned, is to follow the breadcrumbs. Trust the process, stop shooting, stop pushing, follow meaning, follow curiosity, even if it doesn't make any logical sense. Those things that maybe you've been putting off to the side because you keep thinking, well, I don't have time for that because I should be doing this. Maybe those are the things for you to explore, taking a look at. It might not make logical sense, but you might be surprised what unfolds.

Speaker 1: 54:45

I have so much more to share and, as I continue this project, I'm going to have more and more to share with you, because I can see some really important puzzle pieces getting put together and I'm not quite ready. More and more to share with you, because I can see some really important puzzle pieces getting put together and I'm not quite ready to share them yet. Now I'm going to be having a couple of podcast interviews with some guests very soon and I'm really excited to share those with you once I record them. I think that you're going to enjoy these conversations as well, by like-minded souls who have so much wisdom to share. Helpful reminder for you, as well as catching you up to what I've been up to, because I know that I've been getting quite a number of messages from people asking me.

Speaker 1: 55:41

Where are you? You okay, where are you at? I want to know. So here you go, as always, thank you for being here, thank you for tuning in, I appreciate you being here and if you've been appreciating this podcast and you know somebody else who would as well, please feel free to share. Share the love, and I thank you.

Speaker 1: 56:01

And again, if you're wondering if you have any of these astrology patterns that I've been talking about in this episode, you can find that out if you go to the free kit. In the show notes, you'll learn all about how to see whether or not you have these particular placements and you can listen to some audio lessons that will guide you more deeply to understand what exactly these placements mean for you in terms of your leadership, in terms of your purpose and your direction, and how to harness them. And if you want me to take a look at your chart, there's information in the kit as well as in the show notes. And if you want me to take a look at your chart, there's information in the kit as well as in the show notes.

Speaker 1: 56:37

And if you're a practitioner or professional who's been going through this process yourself, you've gone through lots of inner healing, you've gone through an awakening. You're out the other side and you're noticing that your work has not caught up to this version of your evolution and you're looking for some clarity. You're looking for some insight, guidance and support to catch your work up so that you can see that next step in your journey more clearly. Then the Clarity Lab is where I help you do that, and it's the first step in a multi-step journey that I guide people through. If you're looking to step more fully into your legacy work and make that deeper level impact that you know that you're here to make, and you wanna do that clearly, confidently, unapologetically, in a way that works with your design, then the Clarity Lab is the first step. You can find all that information in the show notes, so if any of that interests you, I look forward to connecting and until next time, take good care.