Paralysed but Not Defeated: A Christian Mental Health Journey from Depression to Hope

After a BMX crash left him paralysed, Nathan faced years of depression and doubt. Discover how faith, resilience, and community led to real hope.

What happens when your body breaks, but your spirit refuses to?
 This powerful Christian mental health story follows one man’s journey from a life-changing BMX accident and paralysis to discovering faith, purpose, and healing in the middle of depression.

What We Cover

1. The Crash and the Aftermath – A broken neck, a wheelchair, and life in ICU.
2. Faith in the Fog – Wrestling with God when prayers for healing go unanswered.
3. Depression and Medication – Facing major depression, inpatient stays, and the courage to ask for help.
4. TMS and Recovery – How new treatments and faith worked together to restore hope.
5. Calling and Purpose – Finding a new mission through chaplaincy and service.
6. What Healing Really Means – Why faith isn’t about fixing everything but trusting through anything.

Reflection

This episode speaks to anyone battling mental illness, chronic pain, or grief — reminding us that hope is not found in perfection, but in perseverance.

“Sometimes God doesn’t give us our old life back. He gives us a new one — redeemed.”

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Transcript

Can you imagine that one day you’re riding a BMX with your mate, and then suddenly you snap your neck and spend the rest of your life in a wheelchair? That’s what happened to today’s guest, Nathan Handley. Nathan’s an awesome guy who has come a long way since the injury. He’s now a school chaplain that works with other people to help them overcome their own barriers.

00:00:19:02 - 00:00:38:02
 Dave Quak
 But he didn’t get there overnight. He had some serious mountains to overcome. And as you can imagine, the pressure on his mental wellbeing was intense. So you’ve tuned into a good week. It’s an interesting story with an awesome outcome. Thanks for tuning in to Sunburnt Souls. All right. Sunburnt Souls. We are here with Nate Handley. How are you today, my friend?

00:00:38:04 - 00:00:39:04
 Nathan Handley
 I’m good, thank you.

00:00:39:06 - 00:00:41:14
 Dave Quak
 Thank you for letting me come into your beautiful home.

00:00:41:16 - 00:00:43:23
 Nathan Handley
 Oh, it’s a pleasure. Thank you for coming down.

00:00:44:01 - 00:00:51:01
 Dave Quak
 Mate, I walked into this home and saw a SOLD sign on the front and thought, these lucky buggers are moving in here, but you’re selling.

00:00:51:03 - 00:01:14:14
 Nathan Handley
 Yes, yes. So this is actually my mum’s house. Yeah. We moved in here after my dad passed, just to keep my mum company. And we’re now moving my family like ten minutes south of here onto, like, an acre. I’m going to do a dual-living set-up, so put a granny flat on it for Mum.

00:01:14:16 - 00:01:29:02
 Dave Quak
 Just in your sentences. Okay, so we know Dad’s passed. We know you’re in a wheelchair because you rolled in one. I just quickly—my wife wanted to ask, it wasn’t me—but you know how some people name their cars, you know, “This is the Red Rocket.” Do you guys name your wheelchairs? Like, is this…?

00:01:29:04 - 00:01:32:08
 Nathan Handley
 I don’t personally, but my daughter certainly does.

00:01:32:10 - 00:01:33:10
 Dave Quak
 Yeah? What did she call it?

00:01:33:12 - 00:01:49:18
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, so depending—so I’ve got two power chairs as well. I did—I just got another one the other day through NDIS funding. But yeah, so she’s called my new power chair, which is like a four-wheel drive one, “Stella”—short for “stellium”.

00:01:49:20 - 00:01:54:13
 Dave Quak
 Oh, nice. “Stella” the stellium, and kind of, like, climb up muddy and stuff?

00:01:54:14 - 00:01:58:14
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, it means we can go camping, to the beach again, and all that.

00:01:58:14 - 00:02:04:12
 Dave Quak
 So it’s good that you mentioned NDIS favourably, just because sometimes they get a bad rap. But every now and then something good happens.

00:02:04:13 - 00:02:18:24
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, man. Like, I think for sure I can understand the frustrations in certain parts of NDIS, but without them, oh, you’d be in a world of hurt, for sure. Yeah.

00:02:18:24 - 00:02:20:01
 Dave Quak
 What do you—
 Need the chair?

00:02:20:03 - 00:02:47:11
 Nathan Handley
 So literally in, like, probably a month’s time, it will be 17 years ago I had a spinal injury. I came off a BMX bike and fractured my neck in two places. I can recall the whole day. I was actually off work that day, so—I dropped out of school in Grade 10 and started a cabinet-making apprenticeship, yeah, and absolutely loved it.

00:02:47:13 - 00:02:58:14
 Nathan Handley
 I had an injury in 2009 that year and fractured my skull, and there was a couple of bleeds, but praise be to God the bleeds stopped—wouldn’t need surgery or anything like that.

00:02:58:15 - 00:02:59:15
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:02:59:17 - 00:03:31:07
 Nathan Handley
 So I was off work for three months to recover from that. And when I felt myself getting back to my normal self, I was very much into my action-style sports—so BMX, motocross and water sports—and decided, oh no, I’m feeling well enough to get back out on the bike, and sorted that day. Okay, so I’m BMX-ing, and my younger brother had called me—we used to go to Citipointe Christian…

00:03:31:10 - 00:03:32:10
 Dave Quak
 College.

00:03:32:12 - 00:04:00:03
 Nathan Handley
 …and he called me from college. They lived in Rochedale, so it’s like a good, probably 45 minutes away. And he said, “Oh, I forgot my drum uniform.” I was like, “Okay, I’ll bring it to you.” I had my P’s at the time, so I drove the drum uniform up. And as I was going, one of my best mates was riding past, and I was like, “Oh, I’ll go for a ride.”

00:04:00:05 - 00:04:22:11
 Nathan Handley
 So I dropped off the drum uniform and then went for a ride. And then I was shown this place—these jumps that were a bit bigger than my normal norm, and outside of my comfort zone. But I was like, “These are the sort of jumps I want to get into.” So yeah, pretty much I just didn’t make it over one. The front wheel clipped the landing, you know, somersault in the air, and the first thing that hit the ground was my neck. And instantly I had no feeling from my neck down.

00:04:22:11 - 00:04:31:15
 Dave Quak
 No way, man. Did you hear, like, a snap or anything, or not?

00:04:35:09 - 00:04:57:16
 Nathan Handley
 Honestly had no idea what I’d done. I had no awareness of what a spinal cord injury was. Like, I remember people joking about “breaking your back,” but I didn’t know what that meant. Lucky enough, where I had my injury was in Dutton Park, and the PA Hospital, which is the spinal cord injury hub, was like a five-minute ambulance ride.

00:04:57:18 - 00:05:34:12
 Nathan Handley
 So yeah, in the ambulance, straight into a kind of holding room. The room seemed really big. It was—what—doctors, nurses, heaps of people in the room. And I recall them saying, “Are you a fresh ‘C-something’?” I’m like, “Yeah, okay—what does that mean?” Like, I just had no idea, man. And obviously, like I said, at the time I had no feeling from the neck down and I couldn’t move anything below that as well.

00:05:34:12 - 00:05:52:09
 Nathan Handley
 I think later I got a little bit—and in fact, when we were still at the site where I had my injury, I actually asked my best mate to try and help me sit up, but without knowing that that’s a big no-no. We just did it because I was like, “Oh yeah, I’m all right,” because of all the injuries…

00:05:52:11 - 00:06:17:14
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, and because of all the injuries I’d had in the past, I thought I was in shock. So I was like, “I think I just need to wake somebody up.” And yeah, so I already tried sitting up—obviously unsafe—and slid back down after that. But in a day or maybe, them screwing these things into my skull called, like, tongs—they stabilise your neck, stretch it out.

00:06:17:16 - 00:06:43:03
 Nathan Handley
 And honestly it didn’t feel like that long until they rushed me into surgery. “We need to remove the broken bits—bone in your neck—and then we’ll take some bone from your hip, put it in there and stabilise it all.” Just before I left for surgery—before I got wheeled off—I remember saying to the doctors, “Am I not going to walk again?” And they didn’t answer. And my dad was like, “You’ll walk again. We’ll push for it. We’ll fight for it.”

00:06:43:05 - 00:07:06:19
 Nathan Handley
 So yeah, into surgery and into the surgeons—“This is what we’ll do”—I said, “Okay.” And then I woke up and I was like, “Well, I’ve done something really bad.” I woke up on life support.

00:07:06:21 - 00:07:34:10
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, I had a tube down my throat breathing for me. I believe while they were doing the surgery on my neck that an infection was introduced, so I had a really bad chest infection. And people who have had spinal cord injuries—depending on the level—generally, if you damage, fracture, break or damage the spinal cord in your cervical area, so in your neck, that can impact your respiratory system.

00:07:34:10 - 00:08:00:10
 Nathan Handley
 So, like, even now, 17 years later, I don’t cough to a normal standard, I guess. Yeah, okay. Or to a full—yeah, not a full cough. So it’s a bit less—doesn’t have as much oomph behind it. Back then, 100%—I had like half.

00:08:00:10 - 00:08:15:19
 Nathan Handley
 So I remember, because I had that chest infection and was in ICU, to get the phlegm up officially they would have to come along and manually cough me, which was insane. Like, they just pump your chest.

00:08:15:19 - 00:08:17:13
 Dave Quak
 Really? Like this sort of thing?

00:08:17:18 - 00:08:35:19
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, and then all of a sudden it’s like you’re on a trampoline. And then they’d put another tube down and disconnect the life support for a second—another couple of seconds—and suction it all out. And that was hard enough. I felt like I had no breath at that point, so it’s all taken away. Yeah, it was a weird feeling—horrible.

00:08:35:21 - 00:09:13:15
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. So I spent, yeah, five or six days in ICU. During that time it sort of set in, the severity of what I’d done. To an extent—I thought—I was on life support, I couldn’t talk, everything was being monitored in my body. And obviously you can still hear. I remember a doctor coming in and mentioning to my mum, who was with me at the time—the doctor had mentioned to my mum, “Oh, your son will never walk again.

00:09:13:17 - 00:09:39:18
 Nathan Handley
 He’ll never feed himself, be able to get into a wheelchair—just be bed-bound.” I suppose they also had given my mum and dad the option to turn off life support around that stage. So obviously Mum and Dad, also believing in God, decided not to do that, and allowed me to fight. And trusted the Lord, and believed he’d still have quality of life, whatever. Yeah.

00:09:39:18 - 00:10:02:20
 Dave Quak
 When you were laying there, like, what’s the sensation like when you’re trying to lift your leg and you can’t do it? I mean, like, two days earlier you were… yeah. Yeah. Do you still try to engage the same core muscles and stuff, but nothing happens? So what’s it physically feel…

00:10:02:22 - 00:10:22:04
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, the way I used to explain that—I use this: like, you know when you go to the beach and you dig a massive hole and then bury yourself in it? Yeah. So you bury yourself obviously in the hole, and then they come back—the sand—and it’s so compacted that you try and move your leg, but it goes nowhere.

00:10:22:06 - 00:10:23:00
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:10:23:02 - 00:10:25:03
 Dave Quak
 So that sort of feeling. Yeah.

00:10:25:05 - 00:10:34:23
 Nathan Handley
 So yeah, physically, like you try—mentally you’re thinking of it—and nothing’s moving. So yeah.

00:10:35:00 - 00:10:36:13
 Dave Quak
 See, that must be a head game.

00:10:36:15 - 00:10:37:06
 Nathan Handley
 Ooh.

00:10:37:08 - 00:10:47:15
 Dave Quak
 What was it like for your—I mean, you know, “head game” being the word—what was it like for your mental health during that? Because I can’t imagine, to be completely honest, if I went through that…

00:10:47:17 - 00:10:48:06
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:10:48:08 - 00:10:49:17
 Dave Quak
 …I don’t know how I’d go, bro.

00:10:49:23 - 00:11:14:05
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, it was a big change, man. And looking back at it now, I can clearly say that—my hospital period was like four months in hospital—and looking back now, I could clearly say I would have been depressed. But it just sort of went under the radar. And I guess I was at that stage where I just didn’t want to talk about it.

00:11:14:05 - 00:11:43:12
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. For years. So my routine was that I would get up in the morning, then have breakfast, have a shower and then sit on the couch—watch TV for the whole day. Yeah. Fall asleep on the couch and then get up, have lunch there—back to the couch. Yeah. And then fall asleep again, have dinner and then go to bed.

00:11:43:17 - 00:11:47:23
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, that was my day for a good number of years.

00:11:47:23 - 00:11:54:08
 Dave Quak
 Oh, wow. Yeah. So was it hard not being able to sort of feel purposeful, or like, what was that like?

00:11:54:10 - 00:12:22:15
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, I think because of how active I lived. I was a cabinet-maker—I couldn’t go back to that. Like, my apprenticeship literally got cancelled on me without me knowing. And then I used to ride bikes, motocross, all that stuff—so all those things sort of dwindled away. I didn’t have those options anymore in terms of what I’d do for work.

00:12:22:15 - 00:12:25:18
 Nathan Handley
 So, “Oh, just do an office job now?” No.

00:12:25:20 - 00:12:27:10
 Dave Quak
 That’s not—that’s not you.

00:12:27:10 - 00:12:28:10
 Nathan Handley
 That’s not me, not at all.

00:12:28:11 - 00:12:33:23
 Dave Quak
 That’s why you’re buying the new property—to have a shed full of toys and tinker and stuff, right? I see you.

00:12:33:24 - 00:13:00:04
 Nathan Handley
 So I think during that time I still hung around with my friends that I used to hang around with so often—that we would ride together—but I was still a silly teenager, would do silly things and still have fun. Yeah. I was going to church on Sundays; I wouldn’t have called myself necessarily a committed believer.

00:13:00:06 - 00:13:02:15
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, but I was going to church.

00:13:02:17 - 00:13:05:10
 Dave Quak
 It’s good you were going. We might have got you.

00:13:05:10 - 00:13:34:05
 Nathan Handley
 Oh, I think I was confused, mad in some sense. Yeah. I remember when I was in hospital and after being out of ICU, being transferred down to the spinal unit, and I was in hospital for Christmas. And I remember praying and believing for a Christmas miracle—that I’d rise up and be completely healed. And, like, I was nearly addicted to crying—if that could be a thing. Yeah, like that was my addiction back then. And woke up on Christmas Day, and, you know, I wasn’t healed. And I was just like, “What the heck? What…?” I just didn’t understand it.

00:13:34:05 - 00:14:01:05
 Nathan Handley
 And for years I… like, it wasn’t until maybe seven years ago that I realised that I was praying quite selfishly. And, yeah, I really wanted to go back to my old life, you know? I wanted to go back a cabinet-maker, get back on the boards, go back to my old life.

00:14:01:07 - 00:14:24:00
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. And to be honest, if we look at it from a Christian worldview perspective, then my life back then wasn’t very honouring of God. Yeah. Okay. So I’m like, yeah—what I wanted God to do when I prayed way back then… you know, like, a lot of my view and reason to be wanting to be healed was pretty self-centred.

00:14:36:08 - 00:14:46:18
 Dave Quak
 Yeah. It’s interesting. I don’t think there’d be a lot of people listening who would judge those prayers and say, “Yeah, you are self-centred.” Yeah. Only you know your heart. And only we know our own hearts.

00:14:46:18 - 00:14:48:06
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. And like I never sinned—

00:14:48:08 - 00:14:49:20
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:14:49:22 - 00:15:20:21
 Nathan Handley
 So I was very committed to wanting to get back into a job where I was working with my hands. And I got into an industry—it was a mechanical industry—and I was doing fine for… like, I sort of recovered from that time where I was on the couch all the time. And then I went into this industry where I was doing mechanical work, and the culture—which some tradies that might be listening will know—the tradie culture can be pretty toxic.

00:15:20:23 - 00:15:21:07
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:15:21:12 - 00:15:25:21
 Nathan Handley
 So that actually triggered a lot more depression.

00:15:25:24 - 00:15:26:10
 Dave Quak
 Okay.

00:15:26:13 - 00:15:30:18
 Nathan Handley
 And at that point, then, is when I was diagnosed with major depression.

00:15:30:18 - 00:15:32:16
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:15:32:18 - 00:15:48:23
 Nathan Handley
 And at that point, that’s when I had to start medication. So that was probably a good nine, ten years ago now. So that was a massive low. I had, like, five inpatient stays in the public system.

00:15:48:23 - 00:15:50:17
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:15:50:19 - 00:15:56:09
 Nathan Handley
 You know, time off work because—just mentally—way too low to even get yourself out of bed.

00:15:56:09 - 00:16:01:03
 Dave Quak
 Wow. That’s huge. When you say inpatient stays, do you mean you got, like, admitted into a psych ward?

00:16:01:05 - 00:16:29:08
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. Voluntary. Yeah. So I wasn’t like, “All right, I want to…” No—it’s hard, like, especially in the public system. Like, I needed to sort of be there for my own, I guess, safety. But then at the same time, they’re not nice places to be. No. So they sort of helped me for a couple of days, but then after I got over that—like, got through that—I was like, “Oh my gosh, I don’t want to be in here.”

00:16:29:10 - 00:16:31:18
 Dave Quak
 So with the medication, what was that?

00:16:31:20 - 00:16:42:24
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. So I think I’ve been on quite a few different antidepressants now. If I thought for long enough I’d be able to name them all. But yeah.

00:16:42:24 - 00:16:43:21
 Dave Quak
 They all get confusing.

00:16:43:21 - 00:16:45:21
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, yeah. It’s very long.

00:16:45:23 - 00:16:46:10
 Dave Quak
 And—

00:16:46:14 - 00:16:47:13
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, SSRIs…

00:16:47:13 - 00:16:47:21
 Dave Quak
 Up here.

00:16:47:21 - 00:17:14:18
 Nathan Handley
 …and there were times where I was on two at once. The one I’m on now, I’m actually on a dose that’s higher than standard and had to be approved to be lifted to that. And the story behind that is that, a couple of years ago, I got an internal pump put inside my body that delivers medication to treat spasms.

00:17:14:19 - 00:17:15:20
 Dave Quak
 Okay.

00:17:15:22 - 00:17:45:02
 Nathan Handley
 And no one really flagged the side effect—that medication has a massive effect on mental health. And because I already have depression, it just multiplied. So every time I increased that pump in terms of the dose, my mental health just kept going down, down, down. So I got to a point where the psychiatrist was like, “We need to switch that pump off for a bit.”

00:17:45:04 - 00:17:55:21
 Nathan Handley
 So not long after, I actually saw you on that issue day. I switched that pump off, and I ended up doing 35 sessions of TMS.

00:17:55:23 - 00:17:59:02
 Dave Quak
 Is that the brain thing? Yeah. Tell me about that.

00:17:59:04 - 00:18:23:14
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. So, to be honest, I was quite scared to even go into that field. And, like, you’d understand this from a Christian perspective—you know, like, “Oh, man,” you know, I’ve been told in the past, “Oh, are you using a bit more faith?” You know? And I’m like, yeah, but I have. My view is I’m a firm believer that God still wants us to be proactive.

00:18:23:14 - 00:18:29:05
 Dave Quak
 Muscle that faith and wisdom—and get medication and TMS and…

00:18:29:05 - 00:18:44:05
 Nathan Handley
 All that. Yeah, yeah. So I did 35 sessions of TMS. That pretty much looked like getting up a bit earlier before work, driving half an hour, going down and getting a TMS session and then going to work that day—or doing it after work.

00:18:44:07 - 00:18:47:17
 Dave Quak
 And it’s just like shock therapy, hey? For a certain amount of time?

00:18:47:17 - 00:19:06:04
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah—you stay awake. It’s not, you know, it’s not the other one—what’s it called… ECT—where you’re under. Yeah, it’s not that, it’s literally you stay awake and they find a certain point in your brain and stimulate that.

00:19:06:04 - 00:19:06:18
 Dave Quak
 Yeah, that sort of—

00:19:06:18 - 00:19:17:22
 Nathan Handley
 —and I responded amazingly well. Honestly felt like a different person. That’s cool. Yeah. So 100% approve of that stuff.

00:19:18:00 - 00:19:21:07
 Dave Quak
 And so was that like a part of the turning point?

00:19:21:09 - 00:20:05:01
 Nathan Handley
 That’s only been recent. I think, in terms of the turning point, it was understanding… like, one—having counsellors, psychologists, all sorts of alternative therapies over the years for depression and all sorts of things. And sometimes just being aware of what the inputs are—what can contribute to it. Like, I remember not long after my dad passed—he passed away from cancer—looking into certain things about cancer treatment and all that, and then realising the next day I was feeling like crap.

00:20:05:01 - 00:20:14:14
 Nathan Handley
 I’m like, “Well, this is not helpful.” Yeah. Like, you know, I had friends telling me like, “Oh, you know, these treatments are outdated.” I’m like, well, that’s actually not helping.

00:20:14:15 - 00:20:15:07
 Dave Quak
 No.

00:20:15:09 - 00:20:36:24
 Nathan Handley
 That’s not going to get me anywhere. So, for myself with my mental health, I had to protect my mind and shut out things that weren’t going to do anything. Whether it’s true or not, like—I was just like, sure—not going to get anywhere with that stuff. So I just… yeah, protecting my own mental health.

00:20:37:00 - 00:20:39:02
 Dave Quak
 Guarding your heart, body, mind.

00:20:39:04 - 00:20:41:00
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, yeah.

00:20:41:02 - 00:20:44:22
 Dave Quak
 How did you get called into what you do now? What happened then?

00:20:44:24 - 00:21:05:04
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, so I had to finish up that mechanical role I was doing. And I had a wrist injury there, so I was deemed not physically fit to go back to it. I worked at Bunnings for a little while. That was actually pretty cool—was pretty cruisy, very supportive.

00:21:05:04 - 00:21:05:13
 Dave Quak
 Yeah.

00:21:05:13 - 00:21:36:08
 Nathan Handley
 And it was quite refreshing compared to the tradie role. And then I was like, oh, I just feel called to be able to do something else. I’ve always enjoyed doing pastoral care stuff at church. Yeah, I love that. I always loved chatting to people. And I was like, oh okay—I’ve got a couple of friends that are chappies—and then just chatted to them and, like I said, a week after I had an interview, and at this school now for just over two years—and absolutely love it.

00:21:36:10 - 00:21:39:10
 Dave Quak
 You love it? Yeah. Why do you love it?

00:21:39:12 - 00:22:07:00
 Nathan Handley
 I think—one—just being able to chat to students. Yeah. The hope is to create a breakthrough in their life, however that looks—just, you know, potentially making their day a bit brighter. Whether that’s at Breakfast Club or if that’s having a chat with them. I’ve got students that prefer to be at school than at home.

00:22:07:02 - 00:22:27:08
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. So I’ve said, you know—you’re trying to just… yeah, be alongside them, be that trusted person that they enjoy coming to see. Yeah. I think that can be powerful in someone’s future.

00:22:27:10 - 00:22:44:13
 Dave Quak
 Often it’s powerful too that you’ve overcome a lot. Yeah. You know, and you’re still going. And so a lot of these young people who are still in the midst of overcoming—they need someone who’s still going, yeah. You know? Is there extra-needs students there as well—wheelchairs, myself?

00:22:44:13 - 00:22:51:24
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, I’ve got a couple of students with cerebral palsy. Yeah. And other mobility needs as well.

00:22:52:01 - 00:23:02:17
 Dave Quak
 So that’s the thing—like, I know you had your couch time, but you also went back to the mechanics. Yes. You went back to Bunnings. Yeah. You’re doing this, and this could be a lifer—like, you never know. Chaplaincy, man, can be a lifer.

00:23:02:23 - 00:23:06:10
 Nathan Handley
 It sure is a call. Yeah, for sure.

00:23:06:12 - 00:23:12:16
 Dave Quak
 But I know when I was at school, I didn’t have anything relatable—one-to-one—as in an injury or whatever.

00:23:12:19 - 00:23:13:02
 Nathan Handley
 Yes.

00:23:13:02 - 00:23:18:15
 Dave Quak
 Really could have done with someone who overcame. Yeah. And that’s the thing—it doesn’t have to be lots of…

00:23:18:17 - 00:23:39:13
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, I think—yeah, 100%. I feel exactly the same. And even though I went to Citipointe, like, I struggled quite a lot in school, and even to this day I’ve got learning difficulties. So all through school I needed one-on-one support. And then when I did my Diploma in Ministry, I needed a tutor.

00:23:39:15 - 00:23:48:18
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. And then my chaplaincy degree—I needed a tutor. Yeah. So like, I know how important it is just to have someone. Yeah. Sorry.

00:23:48:20 - 00:23:57:13
 Dave Quak
 Yeah, man. You know, I was only a chaplain for four years, and it was ages ago. I still get kids at the shops—“Hey, don’t you…” You know? Like—

00:23:57:13 - 00:23:57:20
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:23:57:21 - 00:24:01:04
 Dave Quak
 “Thanks so much for this,” or letters, or on Facebook, or whatever.

00:24:01:06 - 00:24:01:14
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:24:01:14 - 00:24:07:06
 Dave Quak
 And man, I don’t know if I did anything, and yet it means something to these people because there’s such a need.

00:24:07:08 - 00:24:22:07
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. And I can relate to that, because these days I’ll, like, say to my manager—like, some days I feel like I’m doing nothing. Yeah. You know, like, I just cruise around and have some chats to kids. Yeah. But there’s power in it.

00:24:22:12 - 00:24:36:05
 Dave Quak
 Yeah, man. And now, I mean, look at you now—like, okay, 17 years ago was dark. Yeah. Now you’re selling a home that I wish I had bought. It’s a beautiful home. You’ve got a lovely wife, on the way in here a beautiful daughter—yes—on my way through.

00:24:36:07 - 00:24:36:16
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:24:36:17 - 00:24:39:18
 Dave Quak
 It’s not like you’ve missed out, even though you’ve had hard things, man.

00:24:39:21 - 00:25:16:02
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, I think, like, being obedient—God blesses obedience. Yeah. And, like, even when I was doing that mechanical role, I was on big bucks—like, yeah, pulling in big dollars. But my mind was in a horrible space. Our marriage was not the best because I was exhausted, tired, drained from the toxicity. And down to chaplaincy—like, take more than half a pay cut—and I just feel like things are pretty right.

00:25:16:02 - 00:25:17:02
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:25:17:04 - 00:25:19:14
 Dave Quak
 So for you to say that, yeah, it has power.

00:25:19:15 - 00:25:21:03
 Nathan Handley
 And…

00:25:21:05 - 00:25:42:08
 Dave Quak
 If anyone’s listening and they’re struggling, right? And they’ve heard about you breaking your literal neck—like, breaking your spine. They’ve heard the support you’ve had. Yeah. Like, you know, losing your father not long after that—all of that stuff. If you can just give two hot tips on getting through hard times, what would they be?

00:25:42:10 - 00:26:08:18
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. So I would say a support network. It doesn’t have to be massive. I literally have, like, an amazing friend that I know I could text—and he might be at work—but he’ll quickly take five minutes out of his day and give me a call. Yeah. Or after work, he’ll drive around here to hang out with me, to check on my mental state,

00:26:08:20 - 00:26:21:05
 Nathan Handley
 you know, pull me out of the house to make sure I’m doing well. So yeah, I’ll say a good support network. And being planted in a church has been really helpful for that.

00:26:21:05 - 00:26:21:18
 Dave Quak
 Really?

00:26:21:21 - 00:26:47:07
 Nathan Handley
 Yes. The church we’re currently in—which we’ve been in for, like, ten years—it’s probably the first time, as a Christian, we again have Christian friends. Yeah. Before that, I didn’t really have Christian friends. We’d go to church, then leave straight after the service—“Yeah, see you next Sunday.” Yeah. Right. But it’s not like that now.

00:26:47:07 - 00:27:20:03
 Nathan Handley
 Like, I have my Christian friends that I do life with, and the support that comes with that is quite incredible—like, genuine. Whether it may be support in terms of pastoral care—turning up to your house and checking on you—or actually coming to visit you, giving you a call. Or if you get taken to hospital, they’re rocking up.

00:27:20:05 - 00:27:45:18
 Nathan Handley
 And sometimes I’ve found with my non-Christian friends—I don’t know, yeah, gagging on the inside—is not… It’s definitely right to have non-Christian friends too, but, for some, it was sort of—especially if that makes a bit of sense—it was like, “Oh, that’s no good, mate. I hope you feel better soon.” Like a bit of surface-level stuff.

00:27:45:21 - 00:27:54:22
 Dave Quak
 Yeah. Not trained in that. It’s just one thing—in the church, we see it a lot, we get through that. Yeah. You know, and as a chaplain, you know what’s good.

00:27:54:24 - 00:28:27:19
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah, as well. And I think it’s what God’s Word teaches us. He’s very caring. And Jesus—yeah—he wouldn’t have sent his disciples out to minister to hundreds if he didn’t care for people. Yeah. So—and then second point I would say is: find a good GP. Yeah, find a good GP, find a great counsellor.

00:28:27:21 - 00:28:53:24
 Nathan Handley
 I know that can be hard, and it’s frustrating. My psychologist that I was seeing for years has gone on years’ worth of leave. Yeah. And I’m like, I don’t want to tell my whole story to someone new. But, at the same time, I know it would be helpful to talk to someone. The hard part of having to start afresh with someone—and then finally you find the person that…

00:28:54:01 - 00:28:54:16
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah.

00:28:54:18 - 00:28:59:08
 Dave Quak
 Mate, they’re hot tips. Yeah, yeah. Good tips. And it’s been a pleasure chatting. Amen.

00:28:59:10 - 00:29:01:23
 Nathan Handley
 Yeah. Thank you. It’s—yeah—it’s been great.

00:29:01:23 - 00:29:13:21
 Dave Quak
 I really appreciate you coming on. And you’ve been an encouragement to Sunburnt Souls. You’ve sent me messages outside of this, you know, of some of the other stories that have helped you. I wonder if you wouldn’t mind praying, as we start to wind up…

00:29:20:05 - 00:29:47:07
 Nathan Handley
 Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord, for this time together—for this opportunity and the work that Dave does. Lord, I just thank you, Lord, for all the people that Dave gets to talk to and get to know. Lord, the people that this reaches—thank you, Lord, that you’re amongst that, and the blessings that come, and the inspiration that can have on other people’s lives.

00:29:47:07 - 00:30:13:04
 Nathan Handley
 Lord, we just pray for the people that are struggling out there, Lord—that are in the grind mode every day, Lord, and feel like they’re dragging sandbags behind them. Lord, I just pray that you’d direct them, Lord—place a great light in their minds and just put them on a path to connect with people, Lord, where they can get some support.

00:30:13:04 - 00:30:16:11
 Nathan Handley
 Lord, thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Lord.