How To Renovate

EP41 How to Declutter - Tips That Actually Work

• Tash South • Season 1 • Episode 41

Share episode

Send us a text


She's outraged! 
I thought as I listened back to myself to edit this episode about de-cluttering 😂

I realised how angry I sounded, and I did consider re-recording it, but then realised that I am actually angry about clutter. 🙈 
I’m angry and annoyed about the stress and overwhelm it causes for my brain, and I really don’t like how clutter robs a space of calm. 

This episode is hugely based on an episode of the The Mel Robbins Podcast I listened to a while ago, and I thought the tips were really simple, and quite different to the usual advice you hear out there about sparking joy and rainbow organising, both of which I have never been entirely convinced of, I mean the dedication and time it must take to keep everything that way for any longer than a few days!

In the episode, Mel Robbins interviews Dana K White, the founder of A Slob Comes Clean, about de-cluttering and organising, and Dana offers some really useful advice and practical tips on what to do if you’re struggling with clutter. In this episode I cover those tips, and add in a sprinkling of my own advice as well. 

I believe that embarking on a big home renovation, should definitely start with a big de-clutter.
So here is it, the original (and a little angry) version of this weeks’ episode of How To Renovate - along with some other ramblings about where I keep my socks and nail varnishes. 

I do calm down a bit toward the middle of the episode. 
Promise.

*******************


Hi I'm your host, Tash South I'm an Interior Designer and Renovation Consultant.
Each episode of How To Renovate is short, but brimming with practical advice to help you manage your renovation project with confidence and success.

Grab some more renovation advice & free resources and become part of the South Place Studio Renovation Community at
https://www.southplacestudio.com/freebies

Everything I teach about renovation falls within my Five Pillar Process for A Successful Renovation, to learn more about the process, head to
https://www.southplacestudio.com/pillars


Or if you want to get social, you can find us here:

Instagram: @southplacestudio

Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/company/south-place-studio

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/southplacestudio

Speaker 1:

Hello, hello everybody. Tash here and welcome back to the how to Renovate podcast. This week we are tackling something that I think causes a huge headache for quite a lot of us. We are talking about clutter. So in this episode I want to talk about how to declutter and I want to talk about tips that actually work. Now, before I get fully into this episode, I just want to say that this episode is heavily influenced by one I listened to on the Mel Robbins podcast when she was interviewing a pro declutterer called Dana K White, who is the founder of the blog A Slob Comes Clean. So a lot of the tips in the episode come from dana.

Speaker 1:

Um, I just wanted to do come clean on that, no pun intended, but, um, I just thought that the tips were so great and it clarified so many things, and also it really fits in with a lot of my own philosophies on clutter and what to tell clients before they start a renovation about preparing for their renovation by decluttering their home. So I thought this would be a really great episode to bring to you. If you're not a follower of that podcast, you've not heard it before but I've obviously summarised it and I've put my own spin on it. But I just wanted to put that in there so that you knew where it came from and so I don't get into any trouble. So let's get into the episode. So, like I just very briefly mentioned there, anytime I work with a client and I start a renovation before I start a renovation project with them, one of the very first things I say to them is to do a massive declutter, and so by that I mean they need to basically take everything they don't need or want anymore and give it away, so get it out of the house. So that is because we don't want to plan expensive storage, expensive extensions to house clutter that the client doesn't even want or need anymore. I mean, here in London you're paying what is it now? I think over £2,000 per square metre for London real estate. Do you want to pay that to house your clutter? I mean I always use that as a point because and this is why I get so dramatic about clutter as well I mean I always use that as a point because and this is why I get so dramatic about clutter as well I mean my own family will tell you I'm quite militant about it.

Speaker 1:

I don't like over excessive clutter in the house. It has a really negative effect on my state of calm and my brain. I have one of those brains where I'm thinking of a hundred different things at the same time. I've got quite a creative brain, so I'm always thinking of new ideas, and the visual load and the seeing that clutter in my space actually really affects the way I think and the way I feel, and I really feel I'm not alone in this. I I've spoken to many people who who have the same reaction, but then, on the other hand, I've also spoken to a lot of people who they find that it's a problem for them, but they don't know how how to fix it. So I thought that's why this episode would be a good one to do. I mean, we've all seen those beautiful accounts on Instagram, on Pinterest, where everything is rainbow, organised into different beautiful baskets and labelled, and all the jars are lined up in height and they all have different levels of lentils and pasta inside, and we all think, oh, that's, that's what I need to do, that's that's how my home needs to be to be organized and decluttered.

Speaker 1:

But as we get into the episode, I'll explain why that is not necessarily the solution, because clutter goes beyond stuff. When your brain is overwhelmed and you're having to make micro decisions about the stuff in your house, it really does weigh you down emotionally and all those micro decisions are exhausting, like you know. Getting into your car and then seeing that the compartment is overflowing with change, or perhaps this is one I have in my house. There's always a big tub of dead batteries that need to be taken somewhere to be recycled, and all of these little things just add up and add up to your mental load and you may not even be aware of it. A lot Sometimes, a lot of it adds to your unconscious mental load and a lot of the time, if you're the one that's working from home or in the home a lot, you're the one that has to deal with it and you're the one that has to take on that mental load. Also, I find this with people who have children, because children just require so much stuff. As they go from being a baby all the way through to being a teenager. There's different levels of clothes, of toys, of games and craft supplies. There's just so much to deal with and it's almost a monthly or weekly cycle to keep on top of it all and that is a huge mental load to take on if you're the person that has to deal with keeping on top of that all the time.

Speaker 1:

So in this episode I just want to talk about how you can take some steps to feel calmer, to feel more at peace, to not feel so overwhelmed by your stuff, because it does come with that cognitive load. It does come with that emotional weight and if you're thinking about getting rid of something but that involves a whole process of decisions like is it precious to me? Can someone else use this? Can I hand this down to somebody in two years time? Can it be useful and in another purpose? All of these questions about every single item that you're trying to get rid of or get out of your home can really give you mental exhaustion, having to do that for lots and lots of items when you're trying to do a clear out. So when I heard this episode by Mel Robbins and Dana K White, I just thought this was brilliant. So I'm going to run through what they talked about in that episode and it's mainly Dana's process, with some of my ideas sprinkled in as well. So let's get into the episode.

Speaker 1:

So the first point is that decluttering and organising are not the same thing. Decluttering, for me, is the most important thing. It's actually taking the stuff that you don't want or need anymore completely out of your home, so removing it from your life and your four walls, whereas organizing is taking the things that you really want to keep and that you need and then putting them where you think to find them or in an organised way, into storage into your home. So that's the difference between the two and it's really important because if you realise that difference, even if you only declutter, you can get to a much calmer place in your life and in your home. Because if you're just removing the stuff out of your home that is causing you stress, that in itself will make a huge difference to your mental load. Because if you're just organising and not decluttering, you're more than likely organising things into bins and pretty baskets and containers. But if you have too much clutter, you'll never be able to keep everything organised, because there's just more than you need and buying more pretty bins and baskets and storage is not going to solve the problem.

Speaker 1:

So you always need to start with a decluttering first, and I think a way to think about this is that everyone has their own clutter threshold and I have to admit mine is very low, unusually low, and I think it drives my family mad, but I think it's what you can handle. It's the level of clutter that you can handle in your home, that you can handle visually seeing, and that you can handle, that your brain can handle as well. It's the amount of stuff that you can keep under control. I think that's the key here. And then, not only that you can control, but that you can control without feeling overwhelmed and affected by it. And then also, I think you know, unfortunately our homes have a threshold as well. Our homes have a clutter threshold Because if you think about your home as a container, there's only so much you can put in there until the space for the actual humans start running out and it starts affecting how you feel every day.

Speaker 1:

So also think about your home is having a clutter threshold and also what your own personal clutter threshold is. And then you and your partner or you and those you live with, may have completely different clutter thresholds, which is something you may have to discuss and come to terms with. That might be a whole other episode, but you need to kind of agree on what that clutter threshold is and that you're both happy. You need to find a and that you're both happy. You need to find a point that you're both happy with, and I think that's exactly the point where you need to start thinking about it is is when you start thinking about it. If you're thinking about all your stuff all the time, you've probably got to a point where you have too many things and it's time to declutter, it's time to get rid of some stuff. So then that moves us on nicely to number two, which is more on. What we just talked about, which is the size of your house, is the size of your house and you need to think of it as a container. And so the way I think that's helpful for you to think about if you struggle to throw things away and you struggle to declutter, you need to think about your home as this container that you want to put your favourite things in first. So what are your favourite things? I'm hoping you're going to say it's the people, right, it's your family. So you want to have your family in that container first.

Speaker 1:

And people humans need space and they need clear space to be able to move, to be able to think clearly, to be able to think clearly, to be able to function properly, to not be overwhelmed. So I just remember once I'm just thinking about this I once read this article that constantly being in a place where there's clutter is it's. There were studies done that it actually has the same effect on the brain as having post-traumatic stress disorder. So if you have all this clutter around, you can only imagine how that's affecting your brain. You might not even notice it, it might be subconscious, but it definitely has a negative effect on your brain and on your well-being. And so people deserve space. We need space. So put us into the container first, and then we can come to your next favorite thing and your next favorite thing and your next favorite thing. I mean, it's just easier to live in a house with less clutter, okay, so moving on to the next point, number three. So let's say you're in a place where you've had enough of the clutter and it has become out of hand and you want to do something about it, but you don't know where to start.

Speaker 1:

So in the episode I spoke about, dana K White recommends starting with the rubbish, so the actual trash. So go around with a rubbish bag and it's recommended that it's a black rubbish bag. So go around your house and take the bag with you and put everything that is literal rubbish that you don't want anymore, that you don't have to make any decisions about that. You're quite happy to throw into the trash that very second and put everything into the bag. And the reason the bag needs to be black which I found quite fascinating is so that you or the rest of your family cannot see what's been put into the bag, so it's literally hidden. So if your kid comes along and says, don't throw that box away, I want to use it for some kind of craft, that's going to stop that happening, because they won't be able to see through the bag. So I just thought that was really simple but really clever.

Speaker 1:

And and doing this, just doing this this way, starting with the rubbish, just helps your brain get into the process. It starts with an easy decision Is that rubbish? Is it not rubbish? It's rubbish, it goes in the bin. So that's an easy decision. So that's to just help you get into the process. So as you move on to the tougher decisions of decluttering and what to throw and what not to throw, your brain's already starting to get into that mode.

Speaker 1:

And then number four is the next step, and this is the easy stuff. So this is again just moving the brain up into the levels, into the more difficult decisions. So this is just the stuff that's in the wrong room. So it's the stuff that should. The stuff that's in the bedroom that should be in the, just the stuff that's in the wrong room. So it's the stuff that should. The stuff that's in the bedroom that should be in the kitchen, the stuff that's in the kitchen that should be in the bedroom is, as you're going around, just take it and take it to the room it belongs in.

Speaker 1:

And another thing Dana suggests is to not to make piles, is to, when you find something that needs to be put into the right room, just take it there. And then she maintains that if you make piles, the piles will then just sit there for ages and not get cleared away. So it's to just do it as you're going through is to move the thing from the wrong room to the right room as you're moving through the house. So now we're getting our brain into the more trickier decisions. And number five is donation. So these are the things we want to give away to charity. The things are too good to throw away. Someone else could still use, and so this obviously takes a little bit more thought. The brain needs to get a little bit more involved, but it's already in the mode of throwing things away and moving things into the right room. So therefore, when you get to donations, your brain is hopefully in a bit of a better state to make these decisions.

Speaker 1:

So first things first is to find something to donate the items in. So dana suggests this should be a box that you're willing to give away, so it's not a box or bag that you want to get back again, because that makes it even harder. You then, at a later stage, you might need to take everything out of the box and then you'll go through it again and you might find something you still want to keep. So she says take a box that you're willing to give away as well, put everything in there that you want to donate, and then make sure that you you actually physically take that box to where you want to donate, to donate it to as soon as possible. I mean, we've all been there.

Speaker 1:

I have had a box of things I want to donate to charity in my car, sometimes for four weeks at a time, and then I end up just bringing it back into the house again. What I've started to do now is actually leave it somewhere where I'll almost trip over it. So I'll leave it in the hallway and then it would annoy me to the point, maybe on the second or third day, where I would just physically take it away, or even sometimes I've. I've done this. I've put the date in my diary to actually to go to the charity shop and donate my box of items or my bag of items. So I think that's key here is to make the decision on what you want to donate and, you know, don't. If it's something you're not going to be using in a year or two and you don't need it and you don't want it, donate it. Someone else can make use of it. There's always someone else who might need that item or who could make use of it. So I always feel really good about donating. I've given away so much in the past but you do also need to make that day in the diary to make sure that it actually gets to the point of donation.

Speaker 1:

Okay, moving on to number six, I actually love this one. I love this little process that dana runs through. And this one is about where to put stuff and I know you've all been there before. I've definitely been there where I go to a place and I'm like this thing let's say it's the nail file I'm like the nail file should definitely be here. I'm like why isn't the nail file? I'm like the nail file should definitely be here. Like why isn't the nail file here? This is the obvious place for the nail file, but it's in some random place that I never would have thought to put it and I don't even remember my thought process of why I'd put it in that place.

Speaker 1:

So I love this one because she says just ask yourself one question. If you're, if you have an item and it doesn't have an obvious home, ask yourself where would I look for this first? And I love that question because this might be different for everybody. It's it'll be your instinct and how your brain works about where you might look for that thing. It could be different for everybody.

Speaker 1:

So so for me, I have this strange thing where I actually keep my socks at the front door. We have this kind of storage bench in our hallway by the front door and whenever I am in a rush I've and I don't have time to go up to the bedroom, find socks, come back down again. Because that was one of my main frustrations in life and getting out the door with two kids was I'd get them all ready. They'd have their socks and shoes on. We all know how hard it is to get kids to put their socks and shoes on. They'd be at the door with their socks and shoes on and I'm like, oh, I'll quickly put my socks and shoes on. I'm like, oh, now I've got to run all the way upstairs, find some socks that don't have holes in them, bring them down again, get them on, get my shoes on, and then suddenly we're running three minutes late. So what I've actually done is I've just put my socks in the place that I store my shoes. So on those days I save myself three minutes every day just by having my socks in that place where I would think to look for them first, which which would be where my shoes are. And I know that's completely random and completely not what some people might think, but for me that makes sense and that works.

Speaker 1:

And another thing I do is actually I keep my nail varnishes in the kitchen on the shelf, above the sink, and that is because I like to have painted nails. But I don't always have the time and usually when I have the thought of painting my nails, I'm in the kitchen finishing off something and I have very minimal time to do that. I hardly ever go to the salon to have my nails painted. It's always a quick, quick, dry nail varnish, and when I think of it I'm usually in the kitchen, so I just reach up above the sink. I'll paint my nails. It literally literally takes one minute, one minute to dry and it's done. But if I had that thought and I had to go up to the bathroom, up to my bedroom, to get my nail varnish, I never would do it and I quite like having painted nails. So again, that solves that problem for me. But you know how many people would keep their nail varnishes on the kitchen shelf.

Speaker 1:

So just think about where you would look for it first and what works for you in your daily life, and then, once you've you've answered that question, so ask yourself where would I look for this first? And once you have the answer in your mind, dana suggests that you take it there immediately. Don't put it off. Don't put it in a pile, no piles. So you take it there straight away. You put it where your brain thinks you should look for it first, and then that is its new home. But the key here is to to do it straight away. Don't put it in a pile, because you'll get distracted and then the piles will make things worse, make you feel more overwhelmed and you'll have to make the decisions all over again. So once you make that decision, you answer it with actually taking the item there, there and then and then. Obviously the other answer to the question where would I look for this first is, if you don't know, if you don't know where you would look for that item first, then ask yourself do do I need this item? Do I already have one? Is that why I can't think where to put it? And if you already have one, do you need to keep that one or can you declutter and throw it out? So I just love that thought process of finding an item, asking where you would look for it first and then taking it there immediately. If you can't think of somewhere to take it immediately, then question yourself about whether you need to keep it or whether you can get rid of it.

Speaker 1:

And then finally, number seven. We're talking about new stuff. So this is difficult, isn't it? If you've cleared out your home and everything's nice and clutter-free and you can see your surfaces again and you're in the shops, it's really tempting to want to get new stuff to refill your home again. But the key here is to really think about the new stuff as clutter. So imagine it in your home, really think about whether it will fit into your home well, if you really need it, if in one or two years time you might just be donating it to charity again anyways. So once you've actually taken the time and all the mental energy to make all those decisions about decluttering, really really think carefully from that point onwards about what else new you want to bring into your home. Because that really I think is is also quite key here is to once you've got to that place where everything is calm and everything's a bit zen and you've made the effort because it's a huge effort and it takes a long time to keep on top of all your stuff and all your family's stuff so really appreciate that space that you've given yourself and be really considered about what you might bring in to your home. And that brings us to the end of this episode.

Speaker 1:

Everybody, I hope that one was useful for you and I hope you'll go and do some decluttering now. With this amazing little sequence of questions and actions I've heard on this podcast, it actually really has helped me. Just yesterday I booked a charity to come and collect loads of pieces of furniture that were annoying me and I didn't need anymore. And they were just getting in the way in the house and after I listened to that episode, I called over here in England it's called the British Heart Foundation, so they have these trucks. They just go around. You call them, make an appointment, they come around and they take everything that you don't want anymore and they take it to their stores and then they sell them and all that money goes to their charity. So I hope it's helped you.

Speaker 1:

I am such an advocate for a clear space and how that affects your mind, and also storage, which we touched on briefly, but storage is one of the key things I I include when I'm doing any renovation, whether it be for myself or for a client, because I think it's so important to have a space that's clear of visual clutter, because it's so important for our brains to have that clarity and that space to think. I find it really overwhelming, and I know lots of other people do as well. So I hope that this episode has helped you, even if it's just to start, with one or two steps to start decluttering. I hope that you can get there and you can see a result really soon. Thanks so much for listening everybody, and it's bye for now. I'll see you in the next episode. But I just want to say before I go that if you're finding the episodes useful and you're enjoying the podcast, please give us a little like or follow or share on social media or share with a friend who you know is renovating or who these episodes might be helpful to. I don't have any sponsors, I don't have any advertising yet, so that is a great way you could help us by just by listening or by sharing or by following. Thank you so much and I will see you in the next episode. Bye for now.

Speaker 1:

For more information on my five pillar process for successful renovation, you can go directly to southplacestudiocom forward slash pillars, where you'll find an introduction to the process which covers each of the pillars and what they cover. We also have a number of other free renovation resources. Go now to southplacestudiocom forward slash freebies. I have created some amazing freebies for you there. There is one on the process, like we just said. There is one on the process, like we just said. There is one on planning permission. There is one on kitchen design. There is another one on lighting planning. Go and check those out. There's so much free information there to help you with your renovation.