Encore: High Seas Respite 2

Transcript

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Welcome back to take care of time, the tails and exhales of caregivers, where we dive deep, no pun intended, into the lives of those who care for others? I'm your host, Beverly Nance. And today we embarked on part two. Of our journey. In our series. Hi seas respite. In this episode. Which we will call deep waters. We explore what happens. When the unsung heroes of our families find themselves overwhelmed and in need of their own respite. We'll follow Nicole, as she steps into the role, she never expected to play, that have a primary caregiver to her mother, Paula. while her sister, Kathy. Usually at the helm takes a much needed break. Whether you're a longtime listner or joining us for the first time. This story resonates with anyone who's found themselves in the shoes. They never thought they'd fill so grab a comfortable seat. And let's set sail. On this eye opening voyage through the intricacies, the family responsibility and personal growth. And now without further ado, let's dive into deep waters.

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Uh. It's early morning in Nicole's apartment. Contemporary. And neatly organized. Nicola sitting at the table with her laptop open in front of her. A cup of coffee cooling and beside it. She dressed for work. But her expression is tense. Worried. Two months prior to today. Nicole's sister, Kathy called her and informed her, not asked. But informed her that she would have to take care of their mom for a couple of weeks because she needed a break. And now, two months later, Nicole is finally asking for time off from her job. Nicole has always prided herself on her professional dedication, rarely missing a day at the marketing firm. where she's quickly risen. Through the ranks. But today she faces a situation that her fast-paced job hasn't prepared her for. Stepping into her sister's Cathy's shoes to care for their mother, Paula. Nicole knows that she is not cut out for caregiving. She's all about her career and climbing the corporate ladder. Now she has to make the call. She's been dreading. Uh, uh, Hi, Janice. This is Nicole. I need to speak with you. about something. it's important. Do you have a moment? Of course, Nicole, what's up. I've had an urgent family situation come up unexpectedly, my sister has had to leave town suddenly and I need to take over caring for our mother. It's quite urgent. I'm going to need some time off effective immediately. Oh, I see. I'm sorry to hear that Nichol. How long do you think you'll need? I'm not entirely sure. But it could be up to a week. Perhaps two weeks. I'm stepping into a full caregiving role and I just don't know. Um, I don't know how long my sister will be away. We'll manage here from Nicole. Family comes first. Take the time that you need and just keep us updated. We can arrange for temporary coverage of your projects. Is there anything else that you need from us? Thank you, Janice. I really appreciate it. I, I might need to work remotely for a bit. Even after I come back just while we figure things out. That's perfectly fine. We'll set up everything for remote access. Just focus on your family for now. Relief washes over Nicole. And as she closes her laptop, the immediate hurdles of professional obligation. Clear for the moment. Although she wasn't completely forthcoming with her boss. At least she got that out of the way. But as she glances at her mother's old family photo on the wall, the gravity of what lies ahead, begins to sink in. It's no longer about boardrooms and brand strategies. It's about medications, meals and managing a household. A new kind of challenge awaits. Nicole hits for her bedroom to pack a bag and head over to her mom's place. It's, early morning at Paula's cozy. Well-kept home. The sun is just rising casting, a soft light through the curtains. The house is quiet. You start contrast to the usual morning bustle when Kathy has around. As Nicole pulls into the driveway of her mother's house. If familiar site strikes a different chore today. It's not just a place to drop by for a quick visit or for our Sunday dinner is now her temporary command center. Her base for the days ahead. Mom is me, Nicole. Stepping into the house. Nicole feels a mix of apprehension and resolve the air is filled with a scent of fresh coffee. And reminder of Kathy's morning routines meticulously keeping everything in order for their mother. Oh, Nicole, what a surprise. It's Cathy with you. No mom, it's just me this week. Remember Kathy needed to take a trip. I'm going to be here to help out. Nicole attempts to mimic the morning routine. She seen Cathy performed countless times as she pours out the coffee that her mother tried to make, and starts a new pot She measures the coffee grounds. Her movements are hesitant. Each step reminding her of her sister's usual, ease around the kitchen. Nicole and recognizes that her mother's memory. Is in and out. She'll she tries not to say anything that may offend her mom. Her eyes scan the neatly organized notes Kathy left. Guidelines on medications, meal plans and emergency contacts all lined up next to the phone. It's more than just a list. It's a lifeline thrown to Nicole who suddenly realizes the depth of Kathy's daily commitment. Okay, Nicole, you can do this. It's just a few days. So Nicole was talking to herself. With a deep breath, Nicole finishes making the coffee carries two cups into the living room where Paula has settled with her morning newspaper the simple act of sharing coffee in the morning, light. Is there first shared at moment, of many to come this week. As Nicole sits down beside her mother, the journey ahead looms large, but so does the opportunity to connect to care and to understand the world, her sister navigates every day. Her first task is simple enough breakfast. And morning medications. Yet the labels on the pill bottles confuse her. And Paula's dietary restrictions are more complicated than Nicole remembered. As the morning progresses, Nicole's frustration mounts. She struggles to maintain the routine Kathy so seamlessly managed. Each small task rolls into a challenge and Paula's needs seem to multiply by the hour. By mid day, Nicole faces her first real test. Paula becomes agitated. Missing Cathy's familiar presence. Nicole filling out of debt. Tries to sooth her using tactics. She thinks are appropriate, but our efforts fall short. The weight of her sister's daily reality begins to press out on Nicole. It's not just a physical task, but the emotional labor, the constant attention. And patients required that starts. To open Nicole's eyes to the enormity of Kathy's role. Nicole manages to make it through the day. But as the sun sets on Nicole's first day as Paula caregiver exhaustion sets in. But so does a new found respect for Cathy? Alone with her thoughts after Paula finally goes to bed. Nicole reflects on the day's hardships and what tomorrow might bring. The weight of the day's responsibilities sits heavy on Nicole's shoulders. Each task more daunting than the last. The room is now quiet. Paula napping peacefully after a taxi morning. It's in this rare moment of calm that Nicole reaches her limit the frustration, the isolation of caregiving becoming too much for her to bear. She doesn't understand how Kathy does is, but she has so much respect for her sister. She decides to call her friend, just to get some things off her chest. www. youtube. com or www. youtube. com Hey, Nick. What's up.Gailu sound tired. Hey, yo. Yeah, I'm at mom's covering for Cathy. It's just a lot harder than I thought. I don't know how Kathy does this every day without losing her mind. The toilet team, the baths. My mom's memory is not what it used to be. She even went out on the porch today and I thought she was going to walk off. I was so scared. Oh, honey. I can only imagine. But you're doing something really important. Even if it feels overwhelming. We'll talk about what happened. Is everything from the meds. Uh, scheduled. So the meal prep. Ah, and today mom had this episode. She just got upset over something so small. I felt so clueless Gail I thought I could handle this, but I feel like I'm failing her. I'm failing Cathy. You're not failing Nicole. You're stepping up in a big way and that's commendable. But it sounds like you could use some help or at least some advice. Have you talked to Kathy about what to do when things get tough. I can't, she's in the middle of the ocean, somewhere on a cruise with a couple of her friends. She left me a lot of notes but there aren't any notes. What to do when you're exhausted. It's okay to feel overwhelmed. It's okay to ask for help. You're doing your best and that's all anyone could ask for. Plus I'm here anytime. Okay. Let's figure this out together. Thanks Gill. It means a lot to hear. I'll be okay. I just need to lay down for a minute. I really don't know how Kathy does is every day. Anytime Nick, hang in there. And give me a shout out at anytime you need to fit. You got this. Armed with a little more courage. And feeling less alone, the coal prepares to face the rest of the week. With Gail's encouragement, echoey in her mind. She's reminded. There's not just about getting through the day. It's about learning and growing through her challenges. Meanwhile miles away from the quiet. Of Nicole's rest. Kathy sits out on her balcony, aboard the cruise ship. Her gaze is fixed on the horizon. Where the ocean meets the sky in a line of endless blue. The salt air is fresh and vibrating. They start contrast to the air back home that carries a sense of responsibility and routine. Whew. This is what I needed. But why do I feel like I'm abandoning them? As Kathy sips on her Bahama mama. The smooth rum mixed with the crispness of the ocean breeze. Does little to clear the fog of guilt that clings to her. Each way that breaks against the whole sensei ripple of unease. Her body is here, but her heart remains tethered to the home. She temporarily left behind. Kathy is aware of caregiver, self guilt. She knows. It's a common, emotional experience among caregivers. Where they feel guilty or selfish for taking time to attend to their own. Physical emotional or social needs. She takes another sip of her drink. And these moments of contracting solitude. Both sisters face their own battles. No Cole grappling with the hands on challenges. Of caregiving and Kathy wrestling with the emotional turmoil. Of stepping away. Even if it's just for a short while. Each solitude serves as a mirror to the other, reflecting on a spectrum of emotions that caregiving can evoke. Join us next time as we continue to navigate these dual journeys. Well, Nicole, find her stride in her new role. Well, Kathy reconcile her knee for respite with the guilt of leaving. Explore these questions and more in our next episode of high seas, respite. Are you caring for someone you love and feeling a bit overwhelmed? It's time to take a moment for yourself with the take care of time. Respite box. Each take care of time and respite box is filled with items carefully chosen to Sue your spirit, and rejuvenate your senses from luxurious bath salts and aromatic candles. To soothing teas and inspiring books. Each item is a gentle reminder to pause and replenish. And now by monthly delivery. Means that every other month, a new box of tranquility arrives at your door, perfectly timed as a regular reminder that taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of others. Visit takecaretime.com to subscribe. Sign up today and use the promo code. Take care to get 10% off your first box that's promo code. Take care. To get 10% off your first box. Remember? When you take a moment to recharge, you're not just better for yourself. You're better for those that you love. Take your time respite box because caregivers deserve care too. Please note that this episode features reenactments and dramatize details. While in most cases, the exact verbatim dialogue may not be known. Oh, dramatizations are grounded in research. To respect the privacy and confidentiality of individuals involved names and some identifying details have been changed. Till next week. Take care. The word it's in. The word is in. The word Is it in. The word Is it in. The word is