The Journey to Freedom Podcast
Journey to Freedom serves as an exclusive extension of the Living Boldly with Purpose podcast series—a platform that inspires powerful transformation and growth. Journey freedom is a podcast hosted by Brian E. Arnold. The Journey to Freedom is an our best life blueprint exclusively designed for black men where we create a foundational freedom plan. There are five pillars: Identity, Trust, Finances, Health and Faith.
The Journey to Freedom Podcast
How Healing Through Technology and Relationships Transforms Lives
In this episode, we delve into the complex and heartbreaking issue of parental alienation through the eyes of Dr. Jamar Montgomery, a remarkable individual whose experience as a young Black father exposes the often hidden battles faced by many in these roles. Dr. Montgomery describes his journey from a childhood prodigy—starting college at the age of 11—to navigating the treacherous waters of fatherhood, legal battles, and an unconventional career path. The narrative challenges societal perceptions of fatherhood and sheds light on how systemic issues can complicate a father's relationship with his children.
Listeners will hear about Dr. Montgomery's personal moments of struggle and triumph, including his experiences with sexual assault and how these shaped his understanding of his identity and parental responsibilities. He provides insights into the importance of advocacy for underrepresented communities while reflecting on his transition into working with cryptocurrency and technology as means for re-establishing his footing in a world that often feels constrictive.
As the conversation unfolds, Dr. Montgomery also touches on how support systems, both personal and professional, play a critical role in the journey towards resilience. He emphasizes the power of relationships, faith, and technology in creating opportunities for personal and communal growth. This episode is not just a story of individual trials; it urges listeners to reflect on their dynamics, the narratives surrounding fatherhood, and the importance of equity in legal systems.
Join us as we witness Dr. Montgomery’s inspiring transformation and learn how embracing change can lead to newfound freedom and empowerment. Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with anyone who could benefit from these discussions!
I have realized that the power of parental alienation and how people will poison your children against you. I never understood what that meant until I started experiencing it.
Speaker 2:Okay, welcome to another edition to the Journey to Freedom podcast. And each and every time I get to do these, I get to be the winner. And so, even though I have Dr Jamar on today, dr Jamar is going to give you some knowledge. It's going to be unbelievable things you're going to take with you. It's going to give you some knowledge. It's going to be unbelievable things you're going to take with you. I would encourage you to get out a thin piece of paper, or however you take notes, whether it's on your computer. What's kind of cool is you're listening to this on recording and some people forget when you're watching a recording that you can actually hit, pause, write something down, then hit, go again.
Speaker 2:You know I do a lot of podcasts when I'm doing my walk and you know I figured out. You know I'm supposedly this technology guy right, I got a master's in educational technology and I act like I know how to use technology. But I'm like trying to figure out how I'm going to text to myself while I'm walking what I'm listening to and stop it. And I realized all I have to do is push a button and talk, say, push pause, talk to myself, then I can listen to it later. But that only took me like six months to figure that out. So I don't know if I'm still a good technology guy anymore, because it's passing me by. I'm trying to keep up with chat, gpt and keep up with all the AI and then keep up with all the things. I was like a pioneer in the technology world, especially when it came to the internet. You know teaching it and now it's just passed me by. It's for my kids, it's for the people, but for Dr Jamar, he is in it, he understands it, he's going to talk to us about so many things that can help us. You know one of the things he told me, as we were getting ready to get going here, is that he understands crypto. And to me those are just, you know, like a couple of letters that start with the letter C that I have zero clue about, even though I was in a financial advisory. You know, working through that in my life and so. But the other thing is, when we think about success leaving clues, and the clues that folks have an opportunity to make a difference in this world and to be able to serve others. And you know, dr DeMar is no different than that in the things that he's doing in his life, the things that he wants to do in his life. You know, super intelligent man, that we get the chance right now to take a part and listen to, and so I've asked them to kind of tell a story, like all of our guests, to tell us where it came from.
Speaker 2:Because you know, dr Martin, I don't know if you know that you know, of all my episodes and all the ones we've done, there's a theme that's come out, and one of the themes is just, you know, finding people who look like us that can go out and do the thing, and I don't know why. That's a deal that we have to say, oh, that guy could do something similar, so I'm capable of doing it, but it's been a theme and I say to myself, well, that's not important to me, I'm a professor, I got all this. And then I find myself I go to seminars or I go to something, and I'm literally counting how many people in color in the room that are learning this. So I guess I'm not, you know, immune to wanting to make sure that I'm in the right spaces in the right in the right rooms. And so thank you for being in this room with us.
Speaker 2:I can't wait to hear your story. If you can just start out with who you are instead of what you do, then we'll go from there. Instead of what you do, then we'll go from there Absolutely Well.
Speaker 1:It is an absolute honor to be here on this podcast with you and being able to share my story with your audience. My name is Dr Jamar Montgomery. I am your favorite rapper's favorite political advisor, aka 2WatchDoc. I am someone who is very passionate about crypto. I'm a technologist, I'm a futurist, I am a problem solver, and one of the things that has been incredible, particularly in my journey, is embracing my genius.
Speaker 1:I started taking college classes at the age of 11. I started full-time at the age of 14. I graduated at 19 with my bachelor's in mechanical engineering from California State University, los Angeles. I went on to work for the United States Navy as the youngest weapons systems engineer in the United States Navy's history, started working for them at 19. The system that's currently shooting down drones in the Red Sea was the system that I used to work on. I did that for just about five years.
Speaker 1:Then I went to law school, and one of the reasons why I went to law school was two reasons, as a matter of fact, my mentor at the time, because while I was working as an engineer, he had me also work. I was also working for the NAACP. So during the day, I'm working for the Navy. At night I'm working for the NAACP as chair of legal redress, and my mentor, john R Hatcher III, helped me understand how powerful the law was. The third helped me understand how powerful the law was. Well, also at that time, I was a victim of sexual assault and I was trying to figure out Technology.
Speaker 2:I know gotta love it right technology.
Speaker 1:It's all good, but I'm back. Oh, I seen it took away my background and all of that cold game. That ain't nothing but the enemy, but it's all good. Um, so one of the things that I that inspired me to go to law school, one of the things that inspired me to go to law school, one of the things that inspired me to go to law school, was the fact that my mentor, john R Hatcher III, appointed me as chair of legal redress and I learned how important the law was and how to utilize the law. But it also was a way of empowering myself. Being a victim of sexual assault was a way of empowering myself. Being a victim of sexual assault, and it's something that oftentimes we as men, and particularly Black men, that we don't talk about how we as boys and as young men can be victims of sexual assault. But I'll get back to that a little bit later.
Speaker 1:So after I left the Navy, I went to law school, being a glutton for punishment. I also got my MBA, so dual degree of JD and MBA and I wrote a paper. Who went out to Ferguson and were experiencing that, experiencing police officers pulling guns on them and looking down the barrels of sniper rifles and automatic rifles utilized by the police, and so I was utilizing my background in law and in policy to write policy and legislation that could help prevent those kinds of things. After that, I graduated with my law degree, graduated with my MBA. I then went on to teach political science, took the bar, passed the bar, took the bar, passed the bar. It took me 18 months to finally get my law license, and in the midst of me getting my law license, I was teaching political science at Southern University, shreveport. Now people are wondering like well, if you pass the bar, don't you automatically get your law license? No, you don't. What ends up happening is you have to go through what we call character and fitness, and character and fitness didn't come until Black people started practicing law. They started putting in the Bar Association to help keep new Black lawyers, people who had just gone to law school, from becoming lawyers. All these different kinds of requirements happen. So we look at this segregationist history of how the bar has been utilized to keep Black lawyers from becoming attorneys. It's a subtle difference. An attorney is a lawyer who is licensed to practice law right, and so there are people who have graduated law school who may have passed the bar but weren't able to get licensed. What was interesting was that it was easier for me to get a security clearance and work with weapons of mass destruction than it was for me to get a law license. And what that showed me was that there was some, there was, there is power in the law. They are very, very keen on trying to keep out young From the legal, from the legal profession. So one of the things that and I was no, that was an experience that I had. So I'm teaching political science at Southern University, shreveport and explaining to my students how to make their government work for them. And I was walking it like I was teaching it and I said you know what, what better way of understanding politics than to actually get involved in politics? So, uh, while towards the end of that particular semester, I decided that I was going to run for a united states senate in the state of Louisiana. So, finally, in 2019, I was licensed to practice law and also in 2019, I started my campaign for US Senate.
Speaker 1:Now, when I started practicing law, I was a juvenile public defender in Cattle Parish. Now, when I started practicing law, I was a juvenile public defender in Cattle Parish, where Shreveport, louisiana, is at, and I was defending children, children who had gotten in trouble. This is the crazy part about it. 80% of my clients looked like me were young Black boys from the ages of 10 to 17 who had been charged with anything from a school fight to attempted murder. I lived in the community that I served, and it gave me a perspective into what life was like for children who didn't have the same access to resources and access to opportunities as I did. So I practiced law for about 18 months, but I didn't start having major issues with the bar until I got involved in politics.
Speaker 2:So I saw yeah.
Speaker 1:I saw that the very things that they tell that Black people talk themselves out of being involved in was the very thing that the power structure tried to keep us out of. So if we could be tricked into not being involved in politics, if we could be tricked into not learning the law, then that left us powerless in this system. I found that very, very interesting and, being in Louisiana, I found out how crooked Louisiana was. Now, the issue that I ran into the issue that I ran into, I said earlier was that I was a victim of sexual assault the my daughter's mother. When she first, when we first, met each other, I was either 16 or 17. She started messing with me when I was 17. Are you able to hear me?
Speaker 2:yes, I can hear, can hear you, can't see you.
Speaker 1:but I can hear you. I don't know what's going on with my camera. I don't know what's going on with my camera, but I'm here.
Speaker 2:All right, well, just keep going and hopefully you'll pop back in.
Speaker 1:So one of the things that I experienced was that this 26-year-old woman, this 26-year-old woman, found interest in me as a 17-year-old boy. Right, I ended up having a daughter. My daughter was born. My daughter was born when I was 19, when I was 19. And somebody you know. You might think like, okay, well, what does that have to do with anything? I never thought of myself as a victim of sexual assault until I started understanding what it meant to have been groomed, until I understood that, you know, if the tables were turned if the tables were turned, I'd be in jail, absolutely yeah.
Speaker 1:However, that same protection wasn't afforded to me Yet I was still held accountable. The issue that I had with becoming an attorney had nothing to do because of a criminal record. I didn't have issues because of a criminal record. What I had issues was was regarding child support, really, and so exactly, exactly, wow. So here it is is as this 19-year-old engineer that's working for the US Navy paying child support. I watched paying child support. One of the major issues that I ran into was having to fight for custody, to be a father, and you would think that the court would recognize that. Somebody that is trying to do the right thing that the court would be there to help and the court wasn't there to help. The story of Black fathers and fathers in general, but particularly Black fathers, usually isn't told, and so we have our success stories, but oftentimes we don't recognize all the other things that occur in that journey to success, other things that occur in that journey to success.
Speaker 2:Wow, and it's part of the other theme that has been prevalent in these interviews that I've done with successful Black men is this thing called being a dad and what it means to be a dad, and the folks that are, the systems that have made it so difficult to take responsibility.
Speaker 2:And we hear all the time we deadbeat dad and all these you know terms and things, and what I'm talking to folks is like if you only knew how hard I had to fight to even be around my kids, I would buy them all kinds of stuff and the judge would say, yeah, that's great, that's a gift, but you still got to pay the mom and then all the things that the moms have been doing to try to stop, you know, uh, the dads from seeing their, their kids and, like you said, trying to do the right thing.
Speaker 2:And you know, yeah, one of my guys was talking about how many, how much, he had to pay for visitations to see his kid at a hundred dollars, you know, at a hundred dollars a session or something like that. And you know, and based on something that the you know the mom just made up, none of it was even part of what. What was things that he had done or, you know, couldn't have done, because he wasn't in spaces to do that, but the court just took so. So I'm hearing you, and then the fact that now you were sexually assaulted and this person is, you know, seven years, six years older than you, nine, nine years older than you, and then you're responsible to give her stuff.
Speaker 1:She studied to be a teacher and became a principal of a high school. So imagine this that this person who has committed sexual assault is now around other people who are the same age as me.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:Wow, so, yeah, so these are. So these are. This is part of this. Is this is this is part of my, my story, right? Well, like as I said, when I joined, when I started practicing law and the moment that I got involved in politics, that's when I started having real issues with the Bar Association.
Speaker 2:Gotcha Because they wanted you to. They wanted your research, your child support and all that kind of stuff, right?
Speaker 1:Absolutely, absolutely. This is what this is the challenge and this is what people don't recognize you can be. Are you a deadbeat father if all you do is pay child support and don't see your child? Are you a deadbeat father if you have to make the choice between being involved in your child's life and not being able to pay child support? The crazy part that I experienced was that she would not allow my child to come to Louisiana. Come to Louisiana. So that meant I had to fly from Louisiana to California, rent a car, maybe get a hotel, just to be able to be involved in my daughter's life. Wow.
Speaker 2:So that's a $400 plane ticket.
Speaker 1:That's maybe $150 in in uh 100 to 200, about 200 for a rental car and gas place to stay, just just to be around.
Speaker 2:Just to be around.
Speaker 1:Wow, and you're 19 to 20 years old at this point, you're not only 30 years old. When I was 19, when I was 19, when I was 19, I watched the judge triple my child support from $400 to $1,200. And I had to drive. I had to drive. This is when I was when I was 19,. From 19 to 23, 24, I was still in California. I was living in Oxnard, living and working in Oxnard, and my daughter was living basically in Los Angeles and I'd have to drive two and a half hours in traffic to go pick up my daughter, to spend time with her every other weekend and I had to fight for that. Wow, these are so. Imagine, uh, uh, imagine, uh, imagine having to fight to be a dad in that kind of environment. And I come from and I'm and I'm a young college graduate doing great things, but I'm not being treated that particular way. I'm not being allowed to provide and pour into my daughter the things that I have and the things that I know.
Speaker 2:Wow, how old is she now?
Speaker 1:My daughter is 16.
Speaker 2:16. Wow, and is she still in Southern California with her mom?
Speaker 1:Yes, she is, and you're able to see her a little bit more now, or what's the situation?
Speaker 1:where you. You know that. I have realized that the the power of parental alienation and how, uh, people will poison your children against you. Oh, yeah, people will poison your children against you. I never understood what that meant until I started experiencing it. The fact that I've had to follow restraining order against my daughter's stepfather because of online harassment and things of that sort. Right, these are the things that I've had to experience on my journey to success, and so it is only fitting on this, your podcast of journey to freedom, of being free from those kinds of things and being free from those chains, to freedom of being free from those kinds of things, of being free from those chains.
Speaker 1:So, to give your listeners a better perspective, a better understanding from 2019, from, basically, 2013 to 2019, let me make sure I have the correct dates 2013 to 2017, I was in school. Okay, let me go back a little bit farther, no-transcript. In 2017, I passed the bar. In 2018, december 2018, the Louisiana Supreme Court let me know that they were going to allow me to practice law on a conditional basis. In February of 2019, I was admitted to the bar and, at that same time, I began practicing law as a public defender. At that same time I was also running my campaign for the United States Senate Right, so we're up to 2019.
Speaker 2:Okay, and then I can say maybe we can jump from. You know you're running for Senate, they finally let you be in the bar. And now, how do you? What are the things that are transpiring at this point? Are you spending a lot of time up in Washington DC? Are you mostly doing everything trying to run a campaign in Louisiana? And what's the what's happening during this time when you're trying to do both at the same time?
Speaker 2:Because it's got to be now you're defending kids, so that's got to be emotionally taxing, you know, to see what some of these kids are showing up as. At the same time, now you're dealing with people that have some definite viewpoints, I'm sure, of you and what they think. You are not even knowing you at all, Am I correct?
Speaker 1:Absolutely absolutely. In 2019, I'm in Louisiana. All my campaign is basically in Louisiana 2019, 2020, all Louisiana. However, also, what I was experiencing, also what I was not experiencing in 2020, the pandemic hits. Yes, right, my campaign is in full gear and my daughter said to me. She was like Daddy, I want to see you. I said how often do you want to see me, baby? I'll make that happen. And she said I want to see you every month. I'm flying back and forth in the middle of my campaign every month to spend time with my daughter. So, I'm running my campaign. I'm all over the state of Louisiana connecting with folks and running my campaign, practicing law as a public defender. Right, I'm doing all these things. I'm doing all these things. I'm doing all these things, still pushing forward. Still pushing forward In October of 2020, september 30th of 2020, I receive a letter from the Bar Association, from the Supreme Court, letting me know that I was no longer licensed to practice law, 30 days before my election.
Speaker 2:Okay, so they stripped it from you after they allowed you to do it. Now you get into politics. They're saying we can't have this guy representing us in whatever their what you said character or something that they came up with.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. Oh my gosh 30 days before my election, I get stripped of my law license. But here's the funny part about it as well. The funny part about it as well Out of all that time that I'm running my campaign and kissing babies and shaking hands very little press. But the moment that I lose my law license, within 12 hours of me losing my law license, I'm on Louisiana State News and there was an article written about me, but there was no author on the article.
Speaker 2:Wow, How's that possible? Nobody wanted to cop up to say that they're the ones who wrote it. I mean, I know they didn't do anything right.
Speaker 1:The one thing that I should have did is I should have sued. When I was talking about suing, then, all of a sudden, somebody got in contact with me. So now I'm in this position and I'm like goodness gracious, like, oh my, you know, what am I going to do? This is how I was feeding myself, this is how I was providing for myself. Right, what do I do?
Speaker 2:well, and you're also working for. You're working for the state or the county or the city, right, because you're a public defender you're not working for like a private practice, right? You were literally working for the people who are pulling this from you.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, wow, absolutely. So I lose my law license and that means I can no longer be a public defender. My life changes overnight, just like that Devastating, devastating, heartbreaking, embarrassing All of those different emotions I was feeling and going through. And you know, from that point on, I went on ahead and you know I had people coming to me trying to get me to drop out the race before you know all the things that you hear about in politics the, the, the, the backroom deals, the, the betrayal and deception I went through all of that. People close to me, colleagues that had given me their word who all of a sudden backed out. All of those things I experienced during that time and we can talk about that a little bit later during that time, and we can talk about that a little bit later.
Speaker 1:But having gone through something like that, and only for, you know, in 2020 and in 2022, I'm getting a call from Kanye, or, who is now known as Ye right, kanye West, calling me, asking me for help with his school, to be asked to come and meet him down at his office and to accompany him to have a meeting with President Donald Trump, right, right. So when we look at, when we look at the things that we go through right of. Okay, I'm running for office. You know they didn't slandered my name, so you know, slandered my good name doing all those different kinds of things. Here it is. Is I have I, I have put in work for my country, I have served the people of America and this is how I can treat it. Now I'm getting a call to meet with two of the most probably known and influential people in the entire world.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, you hate to say that a lot of these things happen for a reason, but you know, now you're able to influence and work with people that are influencing the entire world, and in front row seat to it, which is just simply amazing that you persevered.
Speaker 2:And I want to thank you for you know, before you even move on, for just fighting the fight, when you were trying to to, you know, be there for your daughter and flying back and forth and you know, I know how hard it is to do that, especially with systems that are geared in, especially when you have a mom like it sounds like she is everything trying to prevent you from doing and you still persevered and kept trying to create, keep that relationship, even with them trying to poison and everything else. You're doing that, wow, so cool. So what? So now you moved up, you're, you're, you're doing things now with you know, kanye and doing things with with Trump. What are some of the things that you could share with us that you are doing in your life that's making a difference in others? Because they're not letting you practice law in Louisiana. So at some point you moved from Louisiana to Seattle, right? Is that where you?
Speaker 2:go from Do you go straight to Texas first? How did that transpire?
Speaker 1:I went from Louisiana to California, to Seattle, okay.
Speaker 2:Gotcha.
Speaker 1:So what made you? Okay, I'll go ahead and let you tell it. Oh well, you know, my entire life revolved around my law practice. When I was in Louisiana, and when I was no longer able to practice law, then I had to do a major shift. Major shift my office was there. I had invested, you know, $30,000, $40,000 into building out my office, and now I'm like, oh goodness, then you realize how cliquish uh louisiana is and those politics. And you know, I ran as an independent and so I was making it clear that I'm not with the democrats, I'm not with the republicans. So I'm out there by myself. Yeah, right, uh, the bright eye and bushy tail. And now the, the bushy tail had been ruffled and been thrown, been thrown in the briar patch, right?
Speaker 1:so coming out with some bumps and scrapes and some bruises gotcha.
Speaker 2:so what did you shift to? What did you move to to doing instead of practicing? A lot of this falls apart like unbelievably fast. Louisianans don't want you, so you say I'm out because there's no reason to fight that fight. What happens next?
Speaker 1:Funny, funny as such. I went and operated as a. I went and got hired as a temporary insurance appeals hearing officer. So when people were having unemployment insurance issues, I was a hearing officer for maybe about six or seven months. A colleague of mine that also had some issues with the Bar Association was like dude. This allows us to stay close to the practice and stay up to date on what's going on, and this is an opportunity that's remote, that allows you to work. You know you be able to work from your computer and do that. So I did that for about six months just to kind of get myself back, kind of stabilized, and then I moved back to california. It wasn't.
Speaker 2:It wasn't sustainable anymore yeah, so back to back to oxnard or back to la just southern california in general back to the inland empire and I stayed with family, okay, and I stayed with family, uh pardon what are you doing now that you're back in cal?
Speaker 1:I'm working with crypto startups.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:I'm advising and consulting crypto startups.
Speaker 2:Gotcha and you do that for how long before you move up to Seattle.
Speaker 1:I'm doing that basically. Up until I moved to Seattle, I got hired with Boeing and I said you know what? I'm going to just go back to engineering. This is what I know I love airplanes. Let me go back to this because all this other stuff I'm seeing is a lot more stressful, a lot more stressful.
Speaker 2:Oh gosh, yes, oh my gosh. So one of the things I want to ask you, because you're telling your story and this is fascinating, but when we think about identity and I know, as you work with the NAACP and you're working with, you know, the young kids and you're trying to help them, you know, create their identity because they're in a rough spot as you're being a public defender and now you're all, now you have this identity of this lady who is making it so rough for you to see your kid. How has your identity shifted into a man who can continue to be positive, a man who continue to keep moving forward, that continues to just plug away? You know you get to meet who is now our president of our united states, right, and work with him, and you know one of the. You know you get to meet who is now our president of our united states, right, and work with him, and you know one of the. You know these influential leaders. How does your identity stay intact through all of this?
Speaker 1:oh, that was, that was probably the biggest challenge. That was the biggest challenge because I couldn't associate my identity with my circumstances. And when I associated my identity with my circumstances, I didn't feel good about myself. Because I didn't feel good about my circumstances, I felt like a failure. So I saw myself as a failure, right, right, even with what I had accomplished. Look at, hey, if I, if I was, if I was this successful, or if I was smart, I wouldn't be in this situation. And I had to. I had to unlearn that kind of thinking.
Speaker 2:When, when you experienced go ahead no, I'm saying this is so deep what you're saying. I mean not associating your circumstances with your identity. And you have all these identities because obviously you're in the genius categories, because you're able to go to college and do all this by the time you're 19. So everybody in the world is telling you you're this incredible smart that you should be able to fly through everything. But all these circumstances hit you and somehow you're able to separate all these circumstances into your identity. That gets dramatically tough for most people. So keep going.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, I'm so excited to hear this Absolutely, and one thing that I learned is that there is no sympathy for smart people and no sympathy for rich people. Yeah, and people think that, oh, you're smart, that's in some ways that that life becomes easier for you. There there are things that come easy. There there are things that come easy, but I'm not immune to life, me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no way, I mean so you can get degrees in study, but that doesn't stop life from happening. It doesn't stop people from discriminating you. It doesn't stop people from harming you emotionally. That's what holds people back in most cases.
Speaker 1:What does me being smart have to do with depression? Yeah, what does me being a genius have to do with not feeling worthy? What does me being a genius have to do with any of these things that any other person has to go and figure out in their own development? So, when we when and then think about it from this perspective, we all there's been this major focus on mental health, as it should be. But I can tell you that, as a young black man, you don't start figuring out how to even use therapy until you find, until you look back on these particular patterns of behavior and you're like yo, something's got to change. I went to it. I went to a therapist when I was, when I was in law school, and the therapist told me well, it doesn't seem like you need therapy, right? How is it?
Speaker 1:I've experienced trauma, but I don't even know how to communicate that what I've experienced, because I've normalized this trauma that I've gone through. I never saw myself as a victim of sexual assault. I saw myself hey, I'm dealing with a 26-year-old woman. But then when I thought, like wait, hold on. Well, why is it that we treat girls this particular way? If they were dealing with a man that was nine years older than them. And if science says that girls develop faster than boys, then I'm even more victimized, I'm more, more. I'm more victimized than my, than my female counterparts of the same age.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So you know, in my identity, in my identity it was, that was something that I literally had to fight for. That was something that I had to continually. I am and who I want to be, is a very, very challenging process because it requires for you to take a hard look at yourself and oftentimes, what happens, what, what? What happens? We utilize our vices. We utilize our vices to to keep ourselves from doing, from making those hard looks. What were my vices at that time? Sex, trying to hide that pain and hide that emptiness through reckless sexual behavior and Right. We don't. We don't talk about that as as, as as young men and as especially as young black men, and how. Once again, if we associate what we do in our circumstances as our identity, then when things start changing on us now we don't know who we are, and that's even more dangerous because then we're just drifting and floating through life.
Speaker 2:So so people come into your life I mean, I know you're married now and people who can help the rooms that you're in and the associations you have. Kind of explain to me how that's helped you be able to evolve into the man you are now. Explain to me how that's helped you be able to evolve into the man you are now, and how do you guard those relationships to make sure that they're not as destructive as some of the other ones, or helpful? Maybe the other ones weren't destructive, but there wasn't ones that were as helpful into shaping you into who you are now.
Speaker 1:What does that look like for you? Oh man, that is a very, very, very challenging. That was a very challenging process for me, because if you do not recognize who you are, if you are not clear in your identity, people, others will see you, they'll see your capabilities and they'll take advantage of that. And when they take advantage of that, if you partner up not knowing who you are and then not feeling worthy, you will tolerate things and experience things that you never should experience and never should tolerate in the first place.
Speaker 2:And I went through that and it took for me meeting my wife and my wife to really pour into me and be able to help me discover and rediscover who I was and who I am.
Speaker 1:My wife met me. My wife met me. I was literally at one of my lowest points and she laughs. She laughs at me today, like I realize things were that rough for you. We met. The funny thing is is one of the reasons why I'm so passionate about crypto is because I met my wife through crypto. Oh really, we met at a cryptocurrency conference and I literally had my books in my computer backpack at the conference and she's like I didn't know that you were broke. At the time. I said, yes, babe, I was investing all that I had into going to this conference and making sure to meet the right people.
Speaker 2:Wow, not only were you broke, you were broken at the time.
Speaker 1:Broken and broken, broken and broken. What had her laughing? She didn't realize. She was like okay, we're getting ready to go the first night that. The first day that I met her, I was you know, we're at the conference together just like I said ran into her and she invited me out to dinner with her friends later on that night at Ruth and have Ruth money. I didn't have McDonald's money, right, right, I had I got food at home in the refrigerator money at that time. So I timed it perfectly where I got there, basically when everybody was finished eating, right. So I'm there kicking it with them.
Speaker 1:The next night we're supposed to be going to another dinner and this time the dinner's paid for but was, uh, maybe like a six block walk. It was like six blocks away in dc and she was like, okay, well, you know, just order the uber. And I was like I was like, oh well, I don't, I don't have the, I don't have the uber. I was getting it and I had to say, well, you know, I don't really have the Uber car connected to my Uber. I had to make up some excuse.
Speaker 2:I'll get the.
Speaker 1:Uber.
Speaker 2:So did she walk with you.
Speaker 1:Finally, no, no, no, she got the the uber. Oh, she got it.
Speaker 1:okay, uber for both of us yeah, oh, that's awesome yeah, yeah, yeah, she got the uber for she got the uber for both of us, um, but it was like I said. Like I said it was is in that experience. It was really being able to see who's who's for you, who wants to see you do well, and there are people who say that they want you to do well, but will sit there and watch you grovel and won't give you it, won't give you any help, and that was one of the things that I experienced what's your wife's name? My wife's name is Khadijah.
Speaker 2:Khadijah. I'm so thankful for Khadijah that jumped into your life because I'm thankful for her too.
Speaker 1:I'm thankful for her too. I thank God for her every day. I thank God for her every day. Yeah, she changed my life. She changed my life. I'd hear stories about people like us talking about that with their wife and things like that. Now I get it. I get it.
Speaker 2:She saved you. God sent her your way, somehow, some way Between the two of you and I'm not going to say it's all been. You know roses every second that you've been around but, man, the person that you could be right now without her, yeah, what a waste that would have been Absolutely as talented as you are but then not have that emotional stability that is needed to move on. How do you trust people? You know you've gone through all this and now you're doing stuff and you're making it work and crypto, and you always do you find it where I don't trust anybody until they show me I can trust them. Or do you still have something in you that says I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt? How does that work with you?
Speaker 1:You know, for me there's still that piece of I give you the benefit, I give people the benefit of the doubt, but it's not even necessarily the benefit of the doubt. Now I'll say that it's more I give people grace, that it's more I give people grace and I try to allow people to be themselves. I allow people to be themselves so that they can show me who they are and that I can make decisions from that. And I get to choose on how I engage with this particular person. I engage with this particular person, I get to engage. I get to choose how I get to engage, when I get to engage and why I get to engage.
Speaker 2:Gotcha, that's cool. Thank you for sharing that. Your faith. How has your faith interacted in this whole process of your life, of the, you know, the last 15 years of your life where you've just been, you know so up and down and so all over the place, not by your choosing, but by just circumstances.
Speaker 1:You know, I went to a Black Christian school when I was younger. I went to a black Christian school when I was younger right, I went to a black Christian school. I had encounters with God when I was working with the Navy, but I didn't understand what it meant to be a real true believer until I met my wife. True believer until I met my wife. I didn't understand what it meant to believe in Yeshua HaMashiach. I didn't realize, I didn't understand what that meant. I didn't have, I wasn't able to. I didn't know what it meant to have a true relationship with God, with the one true living God, until I met my wife and she introduced me to the men and women of God at Miracle Arena for All Nations in Toronto, canada. Wow.
Speaker 2:You didn't even talk about Toronto before you jumped into Canada, canada. Wow, you didn't even talk about Toronto before you jumped into Canada.
Speaker 1:Look, I want people to understand that if you're not growing and if you're not witnessing God work in your life, then you need to go somewhere else. And when he says, seek ye first, the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you, it is, it's seriously looking for him. Looking for him and knowing that the stories in the Bible and knowing that the stories I get emotional about this, so you have to excuse me.
Speaker 2:No, that's all right.
Speaker 1:Knowing that the same God that was in the New Testament, that was in the Old Testament, that sent his son to die on the cross for our sins, that he cares that much about me and wants a relationship with me.
Speaker 1:When I became a father I started to understand and started to appreciate.
Speaker 1:But then to show, to have somebody that shows up for me on a daily basis, that wants to have a relationship with me, that gives me the freedom on how deep I have a relationship with him. When I started going through my tribulations and I started feeling like Job, to have lost things and to be now in a season of restoration, greater understanding of just how spiritual that this world is, to understand just how real God truly is, to take what is written in that in his book as fact, that's a whole different kind of walk. To recognize that that to, to, to follow him, to follow him, means that there is a denied life. Right, I have to learn how to have a different kind of fun and a new fun. But the fun that I have now there's peace associated with it. That, the elevation that I have now that there's persecution but there's the peace that passes all understanding. Yes, my wife was the first person who didn't care. Her concern was about how my relationship with god was wow, it is so cool.
Speaker 2:I mean just, to see the transformation in you, you know, through your story, because you know I I haven't known you here in a while but to see how God has taken a hold of you and to think of what he's going to do in your life now, that he's the center of your life, and all those things that you went through and all those things were preparing you for such a time as this, it's just incredible and I thank you for sharing that because it is so important, especially for the folks that are listening, that are struggling, that are going I don't know. I took a group of men Black men down to Alabama last week and after we go through Birmingham and we go through Selma and we end up at the you know, Brian Stevenson museum in in Montgomery they were angry.
Speaker 1:They were angry with our society.
Speaker 2:They're angry with this, and but we were able to keep God in the center and even though we not might not have the answers. It might not know why we're still able to go wait a minute.
Speaker 2:There is a God who has a plan, and this is for a time such as this, so thank you so much for for sharing that I want to give you some time, as we got, you know, a few minutes left to kind of talk about what you want to talk about crypto, talk about what you're excited about, because you, we're going to stay in touch, because you're going to have an amazing life and I want to be part of it. Uh, but yeah whatever you want, want to talk to her in the last 10 minutes or so. I want to give you the floor to do that.
Speaker 2:But thank you for the last 50 because it has changed my life and you were an amazing man, and I can't wait to spend more time, but tell us about whatever it is that's on your mind, on your heart.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. As the enemy keeps going after my camera and going after this particular broadcast. I rebuke that spirit in the name of Jesus. You know, learning the new advancements that are going on in crypto and in AI, how can you not be excited about those things? The challenge is is like everything is changing so quickly and it can feel like you're always behind, because the things that are publicized are literally like the very earliest adopters, right, the various early adopters, and so it's just recognizing. Ok, you know what? I'm going to utilize this technology on a daily basis. I'm going to have it integrated into my life and as I get it integrated, I will learn how to use it better. So that is for anybody that feels overwhelmed, because, trust me, even as a genius, as a technologist, it can be overwhelming for me. So I know that it's overwhelming for others, for other smart people that are part of your audience. You're not alone, you're OK, I'm here, don't worry. Woosah, woosah. So when we one of the things that I'm most excited about, one of the things I'm most excited about is what's going on in the crypto market, and a lot of people may have issues with this particular president, and you know, reasons may be valid the one there were. We have to understand that there are a thousand hills that we can die on, yet we should choose the three hills that we can live and thrive on, point blank period. When I was down and out, it was crypto. It was crypto that saved my life. It was crypto that helped me find my wife. It is crypto that is going to help create this new life that I'm looking forward to, and so this particular administration has been very friendly towards crypto.
Speaker 1:And what better? What better way of people say oh well, you got to have a seat at the table. Well, you know, sometimes you might have to um, sometimes you might have to flip a table, sometimes you might have to kick a door in, sometimes you might have to create a whole bunch of a commotion and a distraction and sneak your way in there, and then, when everybody looks up, like what you doing here, oh well, you know, you're the only black guy here. Well, if I'm the only black guy here, I'm not here by accident, right? So those are the things I mean.
Speaker 1:This is the third year that I've spoken during the World Economic Forum In 2020,. This year, I was on a panel with Chris Voss, the legendary FBI negotiator, speaking about business, schools and education and leadership. Last year, I was on a panel with the co-founder of my favorite blockchain company and blockchain group, dr Lehman Baird of Hedera Hashgraph. Right Before that, the year before that, I was sponsored to go out there by a crypto company called SeekVR and I was speaking on the utilizing blockchain in politics, right. So everything that I've done in my life over the last few years in some way, shape or form has involved cryptocurrency. It has involved blockchain, it has involved AI and now currently right now in Bellevue I'm working with an entrepreneurship program, view. I'm working with an entrepreneurship program. I work with startups and I also work in an entrepreneurship program where I'm teaching kids about entrepreneurship, helping them start businesses, and, on top of that, I teach people crypto. But yesterday's price isn't today's price.
Speaker 2:That is so cool. Well, thank you for doing what I would love. We got to know you this time, which was exciting, and, you know, I don't know how often you get to just talk about you, so I'm glad we were able to spend that time I would love to have you come back and we can talk crypto.
Speaker 2:We can spend an hour and you can maybe explain to those of us who are watching this podcast that are using, you know, whatever demographic they come from, but we kind of know who are watching this podcast, that are using whatever demographic they come from, but we kind of know who's watching this the most. And maybe just help us understand how it can help our lives, how it can help us move forward how it's helped you to be able to do that.
Speaker 2:If you're willing to do that, I'd love to have my assistant call you and we'll schedule you back and have you on to talk about the thing that you're so most excited about and you know so much about. You have to promise to keep it on a level that even I can understand.
Speaker 1:It's that Well, Dr Arnold, you know I specialize in, in teaching the hard things the easy way.
Speaker 2:I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it. Cool, did you have any last minute thoughts that you just want to? You know, say to everybody before we finish this one, and then I promise you folks, we will schedule another one it won't be very long from now, so that you will be able to understand.
Speaker 2:I want to know more and more, more about crypto and AI and how all these things I can integrate my life, because I think they're going to be part of our lives for the rest of our lives and I don't want to be behind. It's being the friend, right? So any last thoughts you have?
Speaker 1:Look. If people want to find more information, they can find me at wwwdrjamarmontgomerycom, the same way that it is right here drjamarmontgomery. Drjamarmontgomerycom.
Speaker 2:I love it, I love it Do they have to have a period after Dr Dr Jamar Montgomery, or just Dr Montgomery.
Speaker 1:Say it one more time oh no, it's Dr Jamar Montgomery. No period, drjamarmontgomerycom.
Speaker 2:Got it. Please, everybody who's on here, go to that website, go learn more about this. It's been probably one of my favorite podcasts that I've been able to do, because I got to see your heart, I got to see the man that became who you are now, and sometimes we don't get to see that, sometimes we don't get to experience that, and sometimes it's those stories that allow us to go man, if Dr Jamar could get through all of that, then I got this. I'm going to make it. It's going to be great. It's going to be wonderful.
Speaker 2:I thank your wife, adija, for just being in your life and being there for you. I thank God for just holding you. However, he held you long enough for you not to get so discouraged that you gave up. Long enough to go man, you got something for me in my life, and so what an amazing podcast. Please hit the subscribe button, the notifications button, share this with others, especially for folks that you just know could benefit from this, and you will find some of these episodes that are just as good. That will, you know, encourage you, inspire you, want you to move on and, like I said, I'll make sure that we get Dr Jamar back on we're going to talk about crypto. We're going to spend just that amount of time, at least an hour. If he needs more, we'll spend more time, just so that you can understand, at least to be able to make intelligent decisions about something that's going to affect your life for the rest of your life. All right, you guys have a wonderful day.
Speaker 2:Don't forget, you are God's greatest gift. He loves you, if you allow him to, and we'll talk to you on the next one.