The Hyman Podcast

The Worst Manager in America

• JD Hyman • Season 4 • Episode 1

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Toxic managers can turn a workplace into a battlefield, casting shadows over everything from team dynamics to personal mental health. Through a mix of personal stories and hard truths, I unravel the traits that define these figures of control and intimidation. My own experiences highlight the systemic forces at play, particularly as a black man navigating corporate America, and reveal how these toxic environments can devalue and undermine entire teams. Discover why choosing mental health over toxic workplaces can be a transformative decision, and learn strategies to shield yourself from these damaging influences.

As season four of the Hyman Podcast kicks off, I shine a spotlight on toxic leadership that can suffocate an entire organization. From manipulated budgets to unfair pay, I share anecdotes that underscore the long-lasting impact of such environments on employee morale and satisfaction.

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Credits:
Brand Design: Kevin Ache
Theme Song: "Canary" by Jim Yosef
Additional Music & Scoring: Epidemic Sound

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JD Hyman:

Chapter 25, the Worst Manager in America. Welcome back to the Hyman Podcast. As we start off the fourth season of this show, I want to revel in how much this show has evolved and how each season finds us deeper into the human experience. This season is a unique one, as I plan to arc the season over a single topic.

JD Hyman:

I find all too prevalent Toxic managers, toxic workplaces and the effects it has on the human psyche. Going to work was never supposed to be the most exciting thing but, depending on your profession, maybe you're in your dream job, maybe it was never meant to be exciting, but at the very least it should be enjoyable. Well, that's the goal right. Unfortunately, that's not always the case. You see, in the grand scheme of things, working and going to work seem like pretty routine things. They are, for the most part. Many people go to work, do their jobs and then they go home Many people. I say that because, like most things, when people are involved, things often go awry. So what can possibly go awry when it comes to just going to work? What if, every time you went to work, it was like going to war War because you had to deal with someone with a challenging or difficult personality. What if that person was your manager? What if that person used a series of tactics designed to gaslight you? What if they micromanaged every minute of the day? What if they were the thing that nightmares are made of?

JD Hyman:

In my professional career, I've dealt with some managers like this, and we'll talk about that in more detail in a later episode. But for today, the thing I want to talk about are the managers that make work so difficult that you often think about quitting. The one that causes good people to walk off the job. The one that promotes toxicity. We've all met them. I'm talking about the worst manager in America. But what exactly makes a manager toxic? Is it just about bad behavior, or are there deeper psychological patterns at play that affect not just the individual but the entire team dynamic? In this episode, we're going to break down the traits that define the worst manager in America. By the end of today's conversation, you'll not only know how to identify these traits, but also understand the far-reaching consequences of working under toxic leadership. Plus, we'll explore practical strategies that you can use to protect yourself and even navigate such environments.

JD Hyman:

Have you ever questioned whether your workplace struggles are normal or if you're trapped in a toxic work culture. Well, you're in the right place, let's get into it. You're in the right place, let's get into it. From the Hyman brand, I'm JD Hyman. As a black man living in America, I am living proof that, while all men were created equal, not all men are equal. We're here to dig into the American political system, explore and unearth experiences from the human condition and be a catalyst for some hard conversations that need to be had. No matter what brought you here, I'm glad you came. Once again. My name is JD and this is the Hyman Podcast, part one anatomy of a control freak.

JD Hyman:

At the onset of every working relationship, there is an interview and during the interview, what usually happens is the prospective employee is asked a series of questions. These questions are usually designed to ensure that the employee is a good fit for the company. As employees become more seasoned in their careers, things begin to shift. A little they become more comfortable. They settle into what they want out of. A little they become more comfortable. They settle into what they want out of a job. They become more purposeful in their job searches. They learn to say no. They learn to demand better. They learn to interview their employers. They know which questions to ask and which ones not to ask. They know where they want to work and where they don't want to work. But what about the people who don't have that luxury? What about the people who have to take? Whatever job they happen upon? They don't always get to interview their respective employer. Sometimes it's the luck of the draw and more often than not they are sent through a whirlwind of emotional strife, all for the sake of a paycheck.

JD Hyman:

So what actually makes toxic managers? Well, a lot of things. For starters, they tend to have this innate need to be in control. Maybe it stems from control issues, maybe it's just the way they're wired, but regardless, they want to control every conceivable outcome. One of the distinct characteristics of someone like this the blood ties. They exact control over people using a variety of methods, but the most common and prevalent method fear and intimidation.

JD Hyman:

In my experience, I've seen them target people for seemingly insignificant reasons and then it's almost as if some switch flips and they go after them like a lion in the Serengeti. Sometimes it's not so avert. Sometimes they nitpick, almost like plucking a person's eyebrows one by one until there's nothing left. They do this. They tend to pick apart the whole person. One thing I notice is that they don't tend to recognize the whole person. They only recognize the parts they need, and once they've used up the entire person, they spit whatever's left of them out into the wild like carrion. I know this feeling all too well. I've seen it happen more times than I care to think about and, quite frankly, the more I saw it, the more I wish I had done something about it. But that's what this is. That's one of the reasons I made this podcast to give voice to the voiceless, to shine a light on all the wrongs in the world.

JD Hyman:

The story I plan to share with you over the course of this podcast is deeply personal, and it's a story that demands to be told. But in order for you to appreciate that story, there are other things I must share. I want to get this right, so I went out and sought the help of experts, and, rather than just listening to me and some recitation of the facts, I want you to hear directly from them, and so they'll appear in upcoming episodes. But that notwithstanding, I'm not going to hold anything back, and, while my own story is in a later episode, it's a big enough part of my life that I can share things that are relevant to the topic at hand. No-transcript. They want to control the lives of the people that work for them, down to the penny. And what exactly do I mean by that?

JD Hyman:

In my previous job, I was responsible for building the budget, but the work of building the budget was an iterative process, meaning there are lots of back and forth. I had to work with the hospital administrator because, after all, it was she who would be held to the fire if things went off the rails. Part of the budget building process involved building out salaries for the upcoming year. And how did we do this? Well, we just took the current salaries and made any cost of living adjustments and any market adjustments that we foresaw or needed to consider. In fact, part of the process was sending corporate a list of volatile positions and they would get to work on researching salaries, and then they would send me their research. So I knew exactly how much money to budget for each position. Example if the current rate of pay for a cook was $15 per hour and compensation research showed that cooks in this market were making closer to $18 an hour, then I had the latitude of raising the salaries for those positions to $18 an hour in order to make those positions competitive. In such a case I wouldn't have to worry about turnover with cooks because I knew I was paying them competitively. So I would budget those positions for $18 an hour and then, once the budget was approved, we would submit a request to corporate in compensation to raise those rates for those employees and just like that we built loyalty with our employees.

JD Hyman:

But that isn't what would happen. The administrator would, of course, tell me to budget those rates, but she wouldn't actually raise their rates because now she had a cushion in her budget. I questioned this practice with her and her assistant facility administrator and you know what they said Well, they aren't really worth $15 an hour and they laughed about it. They actually laughed about the worth of employees because in their mind, they could always bring in more people for the same pay and as long as they had a body in the building. That's all that mattered to them. Even after I was promoted, the position I vacated was filled for almost ten thousand dollars less than what I was making when I was in that position, even though we'd budget it for a much higher rate.

JD Hyman:

But she sleeps just fine at night, so I guess that's actually. I take that back. I specifically remember her telling me she had a hard time sleeping. So go figure. And for the positions that she can't fill as easily? Well, when they find higher paying jobs and tell her that they're going to quit, she'll just increase their ways just enough that she can squeeze them right back under her thumb. The thing to remember is that horrible people tend to do horrible things and most of the time they don't even realize how horrible they actually are. Like purposely not feeling key positions because she can save money. Meanwhile the staff are drowning because they don't have the help they need. Or denigrating her corporate colleagues because deep down, she's afraid that they'll uncover all the secrets she's hid in the night. Or lying to her corporate colleagues or bosses or auditors or state officials or really anybody, like it was second nature. But not to worry, we'll get to all of that and more later on this season. So we'll be back right after this break.

JD Hyman:

Part two the manager you love to hate. Let's take a moment to step back and think about what happens when toxic leadership just isn't just a trait of one person but becomes woven into the very fabric of a workplace. You can almost picture it like a virus. It doesn't just stay in one corner, it spreads. The entire culture shifts. The entire vibe of the office feels heavy, suffocating and negative. But what exactly is happening on the ground level when this kind of toxicity takes over? More than likely, team morale is non-existent. You can't keep a team motivated when you're too busy keeping them down, and when morale is gone, that typically means people check out. At least that's what happened to me. I remember the moment it happened. I remembered sitting at home thinking well, there has to be better. Anything has to be better than this.

JD Hyman:

Years ago, I made a promise to myself when it came to working at jobs. If I ever woke up one day and decided that I was dreading going into work, then I was going to stop working there. No job is worth your sanity. No job is worth your mental well-being. True, there were other avenues I had yet to explore. I could have gone as far as filing a lawsuit. Knowing the current climate, I'm sure I could have easily won a lawsuit for having been forced to tolerate that kind of tyranny. But to me it just wasn't worth the trouble. She wasn't worth the trouble, so I bided my time and when the opportunity presented itself, I ran for the exit. When I left the tax department in Ohio, it was a similar situation. Cheryl was pretty toxic and she thrived on toxicity, and, like most toxic managers, she'd managed to alienate herself from her colleagues and her subordinates. She had lost the respect of so many people. Leaving there felt liberating. Getting to work for Kalenda at the Department of Education was a dream come true, but, like my time in Ohio, that dream was short-lived, so you can imagine what it must have been like to come from that place and walk into my wildest nightmare.

JD Hyman:

Toxic managers make it easy to hate them, and there are many times that employees are often able to trauma bond over their shared commiseration. And there's the situations where your coworkers slowly start to dwindle and you're left wondering if there was anything you could have done. Life happens, and all the while we have all these things swirling around in our heads. What is the procedure for this? What's the protocol? What is the policy? I have always strived to be the best leader I can be. I have always strived to put people over profits, to put people first, and anyone who has ever worked for me can tell you I was fair and true and just. Well, almost everyone. I say that because, like toxic managers, there are also toxic employees, and they can be classified by their difficult personalities. For me, those difficult personalities were two of my subordinates who, in their own way, were insubordinate, one of them more so than the other. That's the one we'll talk about today.

JD Hyman:

When I first started at the forensic hospital, it was actually in the housekeeping department. I had just moved to South Carolina Carolina and in a way I took the job because I wasn't picky and because I knew it wasn't going to be long term. One day I was sent to the administration wing to get batteries for one of the battery operated paper towel dispensers. Since this is a forensic hospital, things like batteries were highly regulated. Anyways, the person I was sent to see about the batteries was a woman named Kristy. Kristy was the purchasing coordinator. She was a middle-aged woman with curly, dark blonde hair that was affixed at the top of her head like a large pom-pom. Her skin was a leathery texture and she had very pronounced jowls that were long past the days of retinol, and her eyes had enough makeup to cover the broad side of a hot air balloon.

JD Hyman:

I knocked on the door no response. I knocked again Again no response, I turned the knob to check to see if it was locked. It wasn't. I slowly opened the door and stepped inside. There was a large wall that protruded into the office that obscured her desk. I stepped around and into view and that's when I saw her. She made eye contact as she set the bear claw back on its napkin. CNN was playing on her computer screen and various food remnants were displayed across her desk. Hi, I said, mustering the polite, disarming version of myself. I was sent to get batteries. Without speaking, she gestured to a small stack of batteries at the edge of her desk. I reached over and scooped them up and slid them into my pockets. Thanks, I said. I had just turned for the door, my arm reaching for the knob. When she spoke it was sharp and cut through the air like a knife through warm butter. And next time knock. Instead of just walking into my office, she snapped. You could say I was taken aback because well, I was. I wanted to say well, maybe you couldn't hear me over the chewing and the news broadcasts you were watching, but I held my tongue. I didn't acknowledge her comment. I just turned around and left Fast forward a few weeks after I had taken the job of assistant business manager Nita, my boss called the staff into her office to introduce me.

JD Hyman:

Who came walking in? None other than Kristy herself. She still had the same blank expression on her face. It wasn't until Nita announced me as their new supervisor did she change her face. She was very clearly mortified and I was very clearly eating that moment up. My how the tables turned. But Kristy would go on to be difficult. She essentially decided that she wasn't going to like me, and I was okay with that, because I made Kristy know in no uncertain terms that I would set fire to the building with her in it before I let her run me off.

JD Hyman:

Kristy was spiteful. That way she reveled in chaos. She was mean and rude and all the things you wouldn't find inside a Powerpuff Girl. She had a way of getting people to dislike her. People walked gentrically around her because talking to her on a normal day was tantamount to handling unstable sticks of dynamite. It didn't matter how careful you were or how polite you were, she was always ready to bite your head off. You see, she challenged me. I could have let her attitude get the best of me, but I didn't. I always stopped and questioned myself. How best to handle any situation requires you to stop and think, and I credit Nita for that. She had the patience of a thousand Buddhas. I never met anyone who could stop and think and consider situations before making decisions the way Nita did. There were times I considered firing Kristy, and many times I had conversations with a certain hospital administrator about Kristy, and you know what she did. She always had a way of defending Kristy. I now know it wasn't just about defending Kristy, it was about allowing her to run rampant around my department. She too, dealt in chaos, so I had to find creative ways to keep Kristy at arm's reach, and I was successful 100% of the time.

JD Hyman:

This season we're going to get real. We're going to explore this topic wholly and without reticence. We're going to pursue truth through thought-provoking conversation, and those conversations are going to get wildly uncomfortable. We're going to talk to subject matter experts and we're going to get to differing points of view, both from the perspective of employees and of employers. You're going to get a glimpse of my story sprinkled here and there, and, when the time is right, you're going to hear the whole thing. I may not have been subject to the worst manager in America, but she damn near fought for first place. We live in a world where sometimes silence is the most dangerous enemy, where not using your voice often has dire consequences. What say you? Shall we get a little loud? My name is JD and this is the Hyman Podcast. I'll see you next time.

JD Hyman:

This episode of the Hyman Podcast was written, directed and produced by myself, JD Hyman. Additional research and story development by Whitney Hall, Cherith Guest, and Mary Louise Layton. Kevin Ache developed our branding with additional graphic design by Grant Furness. Jim Yosef produced and mixed our theme song, canary, with additional music licensed by Epidemic Sound. This episode of the Hyman podcast was produced in conjunction with the Press Play Podcast Network. Chase Neff serves as CEO. Injunction with the Press Play Podcast Network. Chase Smith serves as CEO. I oversee operations. Brookes May is a chief creative officer, Danny Edgington is head of sales and Michael Seijas is chief sound engineer. To learn more about the network, sponsorships, guest appearances or if you're interested in launching your own podcast on our network, visit us on the web at wwwpressplaypodcastcom. To learn more about this podcast, our mission and vision, as well as our sponsors, please visit us on the web at wwwjdhymancom.