Love Boomerang

The Call to Serve: Realigning Church Resources with Jesus' Mission

• Kelli Brown • Season 1 • Episode 14

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Have you ever felt let down by an institution you looked to for support? Discover how, as a single mother, I faced financial struggles in the suburbs of Washington DC and found myself grappling with the priorities of my local and the larger universal church. Starting with a reading of Psalm 121, we set the scene for a poignant reflection on the church's mission and purpose. Through my personal story, you’ll hear about the stark contrast between the church's financial decisions and its duty to serve the community, as I recount my disappointment during an annual church meeting. Reflecting on the biblical example of Paul's self-sufficiency, we question how the church can better allocate its resources to truly support its members and the community we live in.

We delve into the struggles of seeking church assistance, drawing from the practicalities of financial self-sufficiency in ministry as exemplified by Paul and the early disciples. The journey continues with my personal disillusionment with the Western church's business-like approach and limited benevolence fund. Wrapping up, I share my personal journey of overcoming hardship without the anticipated support, advocating for a radical shift in how the church uses its resources. This heartfelt discussion underscores the need for the church to embody Jesus' mission of love and service, prioritizing genuine aid over institutional success. Join us for an eye-opening exploration of how the church can better fulfill its role in our lives and communities.

Speaker 1:

Welcome and greetings to you. Today. I'm going to start off with Psalm 121. I will lift up my eyes to the mountains. From where shall my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not allow your foot to slip. He who keeps you will not slumber your foot to slip. He who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper. The Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun will not smite you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will protect you from all evil. He will keep your soul. The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in, from this time forth and forever.

Speaker 1:

Today I'm going to share a personal story. My purpose for sharing this story is to give a real-life example of how the Church of Jesus Christ is supposed to operate and how it's not supposed to operate. This story involves a church in another state that I had previously lived in. This church had a very small building, maybe 2,500 square feet, and had maybe 60 to 100 members and 30 or so attending any given Sunday. This is a very personal story. I survived it, but I have never gotten over the heartbreak of the overall message that it sent, which has left an impression on me about the overall church's mission and purpose. I got over the damage that it did to me personally, but it was and still is a reflection of the church at large. That saddens me to no end because from what I have seen since then with just a few exceptions much hasn't changed since my experiences in the early 2000s.

Speaker 1:

At the time I was a single mother experiencing unemployment issues. I lived in the suburbs of Washington DC, which is a very expensive place to live. I was a contractor and of course, when the government goes through its budgeting process, the contractors are the first to be hit. I went through that for 10 to 12 years after the dot-com crash in 2000. I was in desperate need of help. I was not even living paycheck to paycheck or making ends meet. My family was helping as much as they could and I had a few friends that helped as well. However, I could not move from the area because of legalities related to my ex-spouse and our joint custody. So I was stuck spouse and our joint custody. So I was stuck. I remember a time when I was desperately needing help paying some bills, including my rent. Aside from going to my family, which had already helped me beyond what they really should have, the first place that I thought I could go to was my church. Isn't that where you're supposed to go when you need help? Yeah, no, that wasn't the case for me when I was in need.

Speaker 1:

It was also the time for the annual church meeting, which covered things like the church's mission for the upcoming year, its plans and its budget. Trigger warning for people who are listening, who may be full or part-time pastors please forgive me, I make some remarks that are deeply personal and, at the time, were very hurtful to me. I believe that our pastors are to be fully taken care of by the community that it serves, so do not mistake what I'm about to share next, but I believe there is a difference between taking care of people and commercial salaries that try to compete with the business world. I hope that you will listen anyway and hear my heart, because, as a person who is called as a teacher and pastor, I have conflicting views on this, especially since, at some point, I plan to move to full-time ministry.

Speaker 1:

Okay, that said, continuing on the story, I went to the church's annual meeting. I sat there and listened to all the plans and business of the church and it finally came time to review the church's budget. And as they started to speak, I was appalled. Given that we had maybe a 60 to 100 person membership, the numbers made absolutely no sense to me. Most members I knew of made approximately $60,000 per year or less, and about half of the membership was already retired, so they were living on a fixed income. There were a few that were above that, but not many, and I was far less than that at that time. So here I am, listening in to the meeting of the business of the church and the budget comes up, and I can't recall exact numbers. So what I'm sharing is estimates based on the best of my recollection. The largest portion of the church's expenses, of course, was the building. Close behind that and almost tied were the utilities of the building and the salaries of the church staff, the pastor bringing in the largest percentage of that. What I do recall was that the pastor of a 60 to 100 member church was earning 70,000 plus per year. As a person who worked in the technology industry, I was making half of that at that time. Now here's where you must hear my heart. I have no problems with a congregation taking care of their pastor and making sure that their pastor does not live in poverty I hope to be that one day but I do have a problem with the second largest expense for a church being the salary of a solitary pastor. In fact, I have a problem with the first largest expense of a church being the mortgage payments and utilities, but we'll get into this more in the next episode. Here is my justification for having an issue with the pastor's salary being one of the largest expenses of a church.

Speaker 1:

Let's go to the New Testament, to Paul, the premier apostle and writer of most of the New Testament. Paul says in several places how he took care of himself so that he would not be a burden on the churches that he was planting and ministering to Keep in mind. These churches were being taught how to serve the people in their communities, and he was doing it in order that what they had they could be used to serve others. 1 Corinthians 4.11 says To this present hour, we are both hungry and thirsty and are poorly clothed and are roughly treated and are homeless, and we toil working with our own hands. When we are reviled, we bless. When we are persecuted, we endure. When we are slandered, we try to conciliate. Endure. When we are slandered, we try to conciliate. We have become, as the scum of the world, the dregs of all things, even until now. Acts, chapter 18, verse 1.

Speaker 1:

After these things, he, paul, left Athens and went to Corinth and he found a certain Jew named Aquila, a native of Pontus. Having recently come from Italy with his wife Priscilla. Because Claudius had commanded all the Jews to leave Rome, he came to them and because he was of the same trade, he stayed with them and they were working for by trade, they were tent makers. 1 Thessalonians, chapter 3, 7 through 9. For you, yourselves know how you ought to follow our example, because we did not act in an undisciplined manner among you, nor did we eat anyone's bread without paying for it, but with labor and hardship we kept working night and day so that we might not be a burden to any of you. I think that the example that Paul is not only stating but also living out is to take care of yourself with your own trade. In Paul's case, he was a tent maker and from the tribe of Benjamin, so he had no access to the tithe traditionally. He didn't stop making tents when Jesus called him to apostleship. In fact, he kept doing that and fulfilled his calling alongside that simultaneously. That's what he meant when he told the Thessalonians that he continued to labor in his trade and endure the hardship of tent making so that he would not be a burden to them. That said, I think those who are called to the ministry were never meant to have a lifestyle completely compensated for by the people they serve. In fact, I think they were supposed to be the example to all others that you should have a vocation and you should do that.

Speaker 1:

And minister, let me post a different question. We know Paul was a tent maker and he kept on making tents while he did his apostle duties. What about the other disciples? We know that John, james and Peter, at minimum, were all fishermen. Did they stop being fishermen after Jesus ascended? While they did their apostleship duties, did they become full-time ministers who were fully compensated for by their congregational members? We do know that, after Jesus was crucified and buried, that his disciples all went back to what they did beforehand. Here is the other thing we do know Jesus' disciples were not temple priests. We also know that Jesus came and abolished the whole temple system, the whole of it daily duties of the priests, the burning of the offerings and the sacrificial system. Because he was the final sacrifice, he abolished the tithing and offering system because it was no longer needed. And although later on Paul made collections from the churches, he went to send back to the apostles in Jerusalem because they had given up their trades to focus on teaching.

Speaker 1:

But let me state outright that if I ever get to the point that I'm in full-time ministry, most of my lifestyle will have been and continue to be paid for by my vocation, not my ministry. Maybe some of it will. You know that I'll reap the rewards of writing and such, but for the most part, any ministry that I do will be at God's expense, not the people I serve. In fact, if you look at my website, most of my services are free, except for weddings and long-term counseling. Almost all of my other services are free because I feel that those are the gifts of God that should be shared freely, and I probably would not charge for weddings either, except for the fact that the state is involved and that has a cost.

Speaker 1:

Okay, continuing on with my story. As the church's business meeting continued, they listed off all the expenses of the church, mortgage utilities, charitable giving to support other ministries and overseas missionaries who were church members, and on and on the list went. Then they got to the benevolence fund. I sat up straight for this, as this is where my help would come from. I mean, it's a church, right, it's Jesus Christ's church. Psalm 121 says that this is where I'm supposed to get my help from, right?

Speaker 1:

But as I sat there and listened to the meeting continue on, and as they got to the Benevolence Fund which is what, according to modern day churchism states, is what was to help the community, including its own members, my heart sank beneath the ground. This church's yearly benevolence budget to help those in need, both inside the church and outside the church, was less than my monthly rent. How in the hell would they be able to help me with even one month's of my rent that I couldn't pay and still be able to help all the other people out there who needed their assistance as well, for even a month, let alone a whole year? And nobody in that church's leadership even blinked at that. They just moved right on to the next topic and I stopped listening after that. That's when I got disillusioned with Western church and the way that we have it architected. We've basically imitated the business model and, of course, the business model is based on profits and greed, which are inward facing. There is no way that the church of Jesus Christ was ever going to be able to help me Not that one and this brought about a mental, moral and spiritual dilemma. If the church can't help me, does that also mean that Jesus can't either? I mean, the church is supposed to be Jesus on earth, right, it's the body of Christ.

Speaker 1:

In my disillusionment, I started to have to visit food pantries and, thankfully, several had no conditions on the people who asked for help. They just gave what they could. However, there was one church and it was not the church that I was just talking about, as I had stopped attending that one for the most part after the horrible annual meeting I attended and I realized, even if I had asked for help, there was no way they could actually do it. However, I went to one church with a large food pantry. I drove into the parking lot, parked and walked in. There was what I would call a sentry standing at the door, and a lot of food pantries have that, and understandably so. They can't certainly have violence over food, and I get that.

Speaker 1:

But this was different. This was like a guard at a prison and it reminded me of Matthew 23, 13. But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you shut off the kingdom of heaven from men, for you do not enter in yourselves, nor do you allow those who are entering to go in. Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you devour widows' houses and single mothers. My emphasis, obviously, houses and single mothers. My emphasis, obviously, even while, for a pretense, you make long prayers. Therefore, you shall receive greater condemnation.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, as I approached the door, this particular lady looked up from her clipboard. As I walked in, she said very politely can I help you? I responded I hope so and I began to explain to her the situation I was in. Her next question said more than I can ever express in words about the depravity that the church finds itself in, then and today, and the church is unaware then and today, and the church is unaware. Her question was do you belong to this church?

Speaker 1:

The utter confusion and dejection must have been very apparent on my face, as I had been stopped in my tracks and had no idea what to say. I had to stop and think Now, I could have answered that in a number of ways, but I knew what she meant by that question Do you attend this particular church? Do you come here every Sunday? Do you belong here day? Do you belong here? And she didn't mean it in the universal church sense, and certainly not in the sense of am I a member of the family of God. What she meant, rather, was are you a part of our group? Now, obviously I had to answer her question honestly no, I am not a member of your church. She then told me that the food pantry was for members of their church only and that she couldn't help, even though just feet behind her were shelves full of food. I think that's the point at which I ran from the institutional church. When the pastors and members of a church call it their church of a church, call it their church, then they have lost sight of Jesus, and Jesus is no longer the head of the church anyway. Wow, this is the representation of Jesus here on earth.

Speaker 1:

Among many other things along the way, this was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak, and at that point I stopped seeking help from God's people and started figuring out how to make it on my own, with the help of just my family and prayer. Now, the ending of the story is thankfully a positive ending. Now, the ending of the story is thankfully a positive ending. Jesus never, ever, rejected me, never abandoned me, never left me and never let me or my son go without, although it was tight at times and I did have to make decisions about whether the change in my ashtray, in my car was going to go for milk or for gas. His people, on the other hand, jesus' people well, I can't say as much about them.

Speaker 1:

If I didn't have any resources like family and government assistance, as well as the assistance of Jesus, I would have ended up homeless, because it was pretty apparent the church couldn't, and in some cases wouldn't, help me find any solid ground. If you're hearing this message, then you obviously know that I made it through. I didn't go homeless, I didn't have to give up custody of my child, I didn't have to move home with my parents and, as hard as that period of time was, and as much as I felt that God wasn't there, experientially, god never allowed me or my son to be destroyed. We never went homeless or went hungry, even though I had days of doubt for both. So hallelujah for that and know this I hold no grudges or unforgiveness in my heart to all the people along the way who did not follow in the Jesus way. I am not mad at the people who didn't help us. I know that they were doing what they thought was right at the time, but I did learn a lot of lessons about what the church is and isn't supposed to be like. Based on those experiences, I'm sure that where I'm at today, in my knowledge, learnings and opinions, is still not 100% right, but I can tell you it's more right than what I experienced all those many years ago.

Speaker 1:

I know that, as a member of the Universal Church, I would never let anyone who sought help from me go without some help. Even if I couldn't give it directly, I would make sure I could point them somewhere where they could get the help that they need. I would do what I could to help find a way for the person standing before me. Isn't that what the story of the Good Samaritan is all about? Isn't that, ultimately, what Jesus is about? Love, compassion, help and giving. Even if the person standing in front of you is your enemy, is not part of your group wouldn't even consider themselves a Christian.

Speaker 1:

I share this personal story to make a point, and that being how badly we are misusing the resources that God has given us. We have missed following the one and only commandment. Jesus has given us love, and we have totally ignored what Jesus told us is our mission serving others out of that love. God has provided all these resources to his body so that we could use them to help others, not help ourselves, especially if we're not in need, which is what my personal experiences have primarily been. Even our church architecture points to inward-facing, self-preserving ways, which is still totally at enmity with God's nature, purpose and desire. How we are set up today still demonstrates our own self-righteous and selfish ways in a collective fashion that we call the church. We must do something different. We must do something different. In our next episode, I'll discuss more examples of how we are misusing the resources that God has given us, but this time it's going to be more community-focused.