49. How to Handle Feedback Without Losing Your Voice

Today we’re diving into a topic that every novelist encounters sooner or later: how to handle feedback without losing your voice. Inside this episode, I'll cover the different types of feedback you might receive, how to process it with grace and clarity, and how to make changes while staying true to the story only you can tell.
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Transcript

STEPS TO STORY EP 49 - How to Handle Feedback Without Losing Your Voice

[00:00:00] Nicole Meier: The job of being a writer isn't merely about coming up with the story. It's about learning how it's received by readers and knowing how to take that feedback and hone your craft. Now, four published novels later, I can tell you that while you can't control the type of feedback you get, You can control what you do with it.

[00:00:28] Nicole Meier: Welcome to Steps to Story. This season, I'm focusing on helping you grow as a writer and as an author. I'm Nicole Meier, multi published author and certified book coach, here to guide you on strengthening your story and getting it out into the world. This season, we'll explore ways to overcome the challenges that hold writers back.

[00:00:49] Nicole Meier: From breaking through creative blocks to fine tuning your story structure, Hey

[00:01:11] Nicole Meier: there writers, welcome on in. Today we're going to dive into a topic that every novelist encounters sooner or later, that is, how to handle feedback without losing your voice. All right, let's face it, getting feedback on your work can be exhilarating, terrifying, or overwhelming all at once. Sometimes it can just be straight up thrilling, and that's great.

[00:01:33] Nicole Meier: But whether it's from a trusted critique partner, a beta reader, or a developmental editor, each piece of advice carries the promise of making your story better, but also the risk of drowning out what makes your voice uniquely yours. So, today let's talk about the different types of feedback you might receive, how to process it with grace and clarity, and how to make changes while staying true to the story only you can tell.

[00:02:02] Nicole Meier: So, grab a cup of tea, a notebook, or just settle in for a thoughtful conversation. Okay, first I thought I'd share a personal story about my early writing days. Over a decade ago, when I was secretly penning a novel manuscript in my free time, but still scared to tell anyone about it for fear of being an imposter, I was working as a freelance writer.

[00:02:25] Nicole Meier: In fact, my very first job was writing a blog for my local visitors association. From there, I got hired to write for local lifestyle magazines and so on and so forth. And one of the biggest takeaways from those early jobs was how to work with an editor. And let me tell you, I learned some valuable lessons.

[00:02:45] Nicole Meier: That's because the job of being a writer isn't merely about coming up with the story. It's about learning how it's received by readers and knowing how to take that feedback and hone your craft. Now four published novels later, I can tell you that while you can't control the type of feedback you get.

[00:03:03] Nicole Meier: You can control what you do with it. So let's get into it. Okay, let's first talk about types of feedback and why they matter because really there are very different types out there. Feedback comes in all shapes and sizes depending on who's giving it and where you are in your writing process. So let's break it down.

[00:03:23] Nicole Meier: The first kind is that of writer friends and critique partners. These are your peers, fellow writers who understand the craft and often bring valuable insight about pacing, character arcs, genre expectations, etc. Their feedback is usually conversational and collaborative, helping you see blind spots without overwhelming you.

[00:03:46] Nicole Meier: The next kind is that of beta readers. So these are your early audience members. They approach your story from a reader's perspective. I often like to say they are doing it from an entertainment perspective. They can offer insight on how your book will resonate with its intended audience. You can expect comments about what's engaging, what they like, what they don't like, maybe where they got lost or confused, and what's emotionally resonant.

[00:04:14] Nicole Meier: And then the third type of feedback is that of a professional, so a developmental editor or book coach. These professionals dive deep into story structure and mechanics of your book. And this is very different feedback from what your book loving beta readers or untrained critique partners will likely give you.

[00:04:33] Nicole Meier: Because professional editors will ask the tough questions. Does your protagonist's journey feel earned? Are there stakes in every scene? Does the story deliver on its promise? Do your scenes actually have structure? Their feedback is more analytical, and it's meant to elevate your story to its best version.

[00:04:55] Nicole Meier: Each of these perspectives is invaluable because they address different layers of storytelling. So remember, just as a recap here, we've got writer friends and critique partners, beta readers, and then professional editors. Together, all of that feedback is like a symphony that can harmonize your novel. I love thinking about it that way.

[00:05:15] Nicole Meier: if you know how to conduct the orchestra. So let's now talk about processing that feedback without losing yourself. All right. When you first receive feedback, it's tempting to react immediately. I myself usually experience a whole host of emotions at the start. Maybe you're disappointed or defensive.

[00:05:38] Nicole Meier: Maybe you're ready to throw everything out and start over. Here's my advice. Don't. Take a pause. Before you dive into the comments, take a breath, read through all the feedback without making changes. Then I suggest you step away. Give yourself a day or two to let the initial emotional reaction settle.

[00:06:03] Nicole Meier: Being reactionary in this phase is really not going to help you. So reflect, ask yourself, does this feedback align with my vision for the story? Are there patterns in the feedback? If multiple people point out the same issue, it's worth paying attention to. Then ask yourself, what excites me about their suggestions?

[00:06:27] Nicole Meier: And what feels off? What makes sense in terms of strengthening what's already on the page? Each of these questions you can ask yourself, I would recommend doing it in a journal prompt. Because you get it down in writing, and it really causes you to reflect on each of the answers in a different way. Okay, now that you've allowed for reflection, I suggest categorizing the feedback.

[00:06:53] Nicole Meier: Separate the comments into three buckets. The writers that work with me know that I like to use a system called the stoplight strategy. So let me give you an example of this. In the stoplight strategy, I divide things into three buckets. The red light notes are big and foundational, such as issues with plot or character arcs.

[00:07:15] Nicole Meier: The yellow light notes are about pacing, believability, voice, etc. And then the green light notes are small fixes like grammar, repetitive phrases, continuity errors in timeline, etc. This is a great way to look at all of your feedback and break it down and know that you want to start from the biggest changes on up.

[00:07:37] Nicole Meier: And then, when you're categorizing feedback, there's also a range of subjective opinions. These are suggestions you may or may not agree with. For these, I would say trust your gut, but stay open minded. All right, now that you've kind of categorized your feedback, the next thing I would say is think about the idea of prioritizing your voice.

[00:08:00] Nicole Meier: Your authorial voice is what sets your work apart. Before making any changes, reconnect with the heart of your story. Why did you write this book in the first place? What message, characters, or ideas are most important to you? Use this as your guiding star. And then finally, I would say practice balancing openness with authenticity, because it's essential to stay open to feedback, even when it's hard to hear.

[00:08:33] Nicole Meier: I'm going to say that again. It's essential to stay open to feedback, even when it's hard to hear. Remember, critique isn't criticism. It's a tool to make your story shine, and that's what you want, right? So here's how to embrace it without compromising your voice. Okay, dialogue with the feedback. If something isn't sitting right, ask questions.

[00:08:58] Nicole Meier: If it's a critique partner or editor, have a conversation. Their reasoning might reveal insights to you you hadn't yet considered. Experiment with suggestions. Try out the changes on a small scale. Rewrite one scene or one chapter based on the feedback. Then take a look at it. If it works, great. If not, you've lost nothing but a little time.

[00:09:22] Nicole Meier: And then also, know when to say no. Not every piece of feedback will fit your story. It's okay to reject suggestions. that don't align with your vision. Just make sure you're making the choice intentionally, not out of fear or stubbornness. Writers handling feedback is an art. It requires you to be brave, curious, and grounded in your identity as a writer.

[00:09:48] Nicole Meier: Remember, your voice matters. Feedback is there to amplify it, not erase it. Find people you trust to take this part of the journey with you and you'll reap the benefits of outside feedback. All right, let's recap what we've covered today. First, understand the different types of feedback and their unique purpose.

[00:10:10] Nicole Meier: Second, seek out what makes sense for you. Third, take a pause after receiving comments. Fourth, reflect. Fifth, categorize that feedback. Sixth, prioritize your voice. And finally, seventh, balance openness with authenticity. That, my friends, is a good recipe for receiving feedback. Okay, thanks for joining me today.

[00:10:37] Nicole Meier: I hope you found some nuggets of inspiration in this episode. If you're looking for more support in your writing journey, don't forget to check out my courses and one on one book coaching at NicoleMeier.com. Until next time, everyone, keep writing, keep growing, and keep shining your unique light through your stories.

[00:11:00] Nicole Meier: If you want to check out my coaching programs for fiction writers, visit nicolemeier.com. That's M E I E R. And if you liked this episode, I'd love you to take a minute to leave a rating and review for this podcast. This will help more writers like you to discover the show and to get going on their writing journey. Thanks so much for listening.

[00:11:22] Nicole Meier: Until next time, happy writing, everyone.