69. Real Answers for Real Writing Struggles: Part 2

I've been noticing some common themes in the conversations I'm having with writers. So today, instead of answering specific questions you've sent me, I want to address five patterns I keep seeing in my work with novel writers. Patterns that go beyond craft and into how we sustain ourselves as creative people.

These aren't just technical writing problems. They're the deeper challenges that can make or break our writing career. They're about mindset, sustainability and what it really takes to show up as an intentional and heart-centered writer in this industry. Tune in to learn more.

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Transcript

THE WHOLE WRITER EP 69 - Real Answers Part 2

[00:00:00] Nicole Meier: Today I want to address five patterns. I keep seeing patterns that go beyond craft and into how we sustain ourselves as creative people. These aren't just technical writing problems. They're the deeper challenges that can make or break our writing career. I. They're about mindset, sustainability, and what it really takes to show up as an intentional and heart-centered writer in this industry.

[00:00:31] Nicole Meier: Welcome to the whole writer. A place where we talk about what it means to show up as a writer, not just a better writer or a more productive writer or a published writer, but a whole one. Someone who's grounded in their voice, in their community, in their creative path, even when the world tells them to hustle, compare, or conform.

[00:00:52] Nicole Meier: I'm Nicole Meier, a multi published author and book coach. Who believes that nurturing the person behind the page is just as important as refining the words on it. Each week we'll explore the terrain of writing life with honesty, warmth, and practical wisdom, creating space for you to write from a place of wholeness rather than depletion.

[00:01:12] Nicole Meier: Whether you're drafting your first manuscript or publishing your fifth book, you'll find conversation and companionship for the journey here. So settle in, bring your questions and your curiosity, and let's discover what it means to write and live with authenticity and purpose.

[00:01:32] Nicole Meier: Welcome back writers. Today I am doing a kind of part two of real answers for real questions. If you listen to the first episode in this series, which is episode number 40 under the podcast original name, you'll remember I answered five writer's questions about craft revision and the writing process.

[00:01:51] Nicole Meier: Today, I'm taking a different approach. As I've shifted toward the whole writer focus. I've been noticing some common themes in the conversations I'm having with writers. So today, instead of answering specific questions you've sent me, I want to address five patterns. I keep seeing. Patterns that go beyond craft and into how we sustain ourselves as creative people.

[00:02:13] Nicole Meier: These aren't just technical writing problems. They're the deeper challenges that can make or break our writing career. They're about mindset, sustainability and what it really takes to show up as an intentional and heart-centered writer in this industry. If you're new to me, welcome. The following patterns I'm about to share come from my experience as a four timed published author and my years of book coaching and developmental editing for fiction writers.

[00:02:40] Nicole Meier: I point this out not to toot my own horn, as they say, but to assure you that my insights are both from a personal and professional lens. I've seen it all, and I want to share as much as I can so you can thrive in your own riding career. So let's jump in. All right. Let's look at pattern number one. This is, do I have what it takes to get paid for my work?

[00:03:04] Nicole Meier: This question comes up constantly and I hear the self-doubt underneath it. Writers want to know if they have some special ingredient, some secret talent that will make them one of the chosen ones who actually earn money for their writing. Here's what I want you to know. The secret ingredient isn't talent.

[00:03:23] Nicole Meier: It's not connections. It's not even luck though. That can certainly help. The secret ingredient is tenacity. I've worked with incredibly talented writers who gave up after their first rejection. No kidding. I've also worked with writers whose early drafts were rough, but who had an unshakeable commitment to improving their craft and pursuing their goals.

[00:03:46] Nicole Meier: Guess which ones are more likely to have writing careers. Tenacity shows up in so many ways. It's the writer who revises their query letter 15 times instead of sending out one mediocre version time and time again to a list of a hundred agents. It's the writer who treats each rejection as data, not as a personal verdict on their worth.

[00:04:09] Nicole Meier: It's the writer who keeps learning, keeps growing, keeps showing up even when the path gets difficult. The publishing industry is full of people who succeed, not because they were the most naturally gifted, but because they refused to quit. They understood that building a writing career is a long game, and they pace themselves accordingly.

[00:04:30] Nicole Meier: So if you're wondering whether you have what it takes, ask yourself this. Are you willing to stay committed to your writing goals even when it gets hard? Are you willing to listen and learn from feedback? Handle rejections or suggestions professionally and keep improving your craft. If the answer is yes, then you absolutely have what it takes.

[00:04:55] Nicole Meier: Alright, now that we've talked about the question of, do I have what it takes, let's move on to pattern number two, and that is, I know the odds are slim, but I'm just gonna try querying a few agents and then probably stop. This one breaks my heart every time I hear it because it's self-sabotaged, disguised as realism.

[00:05:15] Nicole Meier: Yes, the odds of securing a literary agent are quite competitive, but approaching the process with one foot already out the door is like showing up to a job interview, starting with, I probably won't get this position anyway. What needs to happen here is a fundamental shift before anything else. You're not approaching agents as a creative, hoping for a miracle.

[00:05:37] Nicole Meier: You're approaching them as a dedicated writer with a project they might want to represent. That's a completely different energy. Here's the truth about those slim odds, and this might be kind of hard to hear, but they're not slim for everyone. They're slim for writers who submit generic queries, who haven't done their research, who approach the process haphazardly.

[00:06:00] Nicole Meier: But for writers who do their homework, craft and recraft compelling queries and approach the right agents with the right projects, the odds improve dramatically. Instead of focusing on statistics, focus on what you can control. Research agents who represent your genre and have a track record of successful deals, whether they're big or small, craft a query letter that showcases your story's unique hook.

[00:06:27] Nicole Meier: Write a synopsis that captures the emotional core of your book. Follow submission guidelines to a t Most importantly, approach this process with the mindset that you belong here. I'm gonna say that again. Approach the process with the mindset that you belong here. You're not asking for charity, you're representing a business opportunity.

[00:06:50] Nicole Meier: Agents need good books to represent. Publishers need compelling stories to publish. Readers need engaging stories to discover. If you've written a strong book, you're part of the solution to their needs. Trying just a few agents is like applying to only three jobs. When you're job hunting, it's not giving yourself a real chance of success.

[00:07:13] Nicole Meier: If you believe in your work enough to write the entire book, believe in it enough to give it a proper launch into the world. PSI am a big believer that writers should follow the publishing path that meets their goals. I'm also a big believer that all four publishing paths, self-publishing, hybrid small presses and big traditional come with pros and cons.

[00:07:37] Nicole Meier: There's no wrong answer if you know me. You know I talk about this a lot. So do your research and determine what feels best for you. Alright, let's move on to pattern number three Now. And that is, I am almost ready to start or to get back to my writing. This is resistance. Showing up as a list of reasons why you're too busy, too unprepared, or just two something to write right now.

[00:08:06] Nicole Meier: The timing will be better next month. You just need to finish this one project first. You're almost ready to clear your schedule and really commit. Here's what I know about being almost ready. It's a moving target. There will always be one more thing to handle, one more obligation to fulfill. One more reason to wait.

[00:08:28] Nicole Meier: But here's what I want you to really know. The perfect time to write doesn't exist. The only time to write is now in whatever imperfect circumstances you're currently living in. Case in point, I was recently on another podcast where I shared how I wrote my debut novel while caring for my three small children and my father with severe dementia at the same time.

[00:08:52] Nicole Meier: Time and energy were tight, believe me, but I yearned to be a writer, so I took one small step at a time and made it happen. Writing doesn't happen in a vacuum. It happens in the midst of your real messy and scheduled life with all its responsibilities and complications. The goal isn't to create perfect writing conditions.

[00:09:17] Nicole Meier: It's to create sustainable writing habits that work within your actual life. If you're waiting to have three uninterrupted hours every day, you might wait forever. But if you can find 15 minutes, you can start building a writing practice. If you're waiting for a dedicated writing space, you might never begin.

[00:09:39] Nicole Meier: But if you can write at your kitchen table before your household wakes up, you can start making progress. The resistance that shows up as quote almost ready is actually fear disguised as logistics. Fear that you won't be good enough. Fear that you won't have enough time to do justice to your story. Fear that you'll fail if you really try.

[00:10:04] Nicole Meier: So here's the antidote. Start before you're ready. Start imperfectly. Start with constraints and limitations. Start with whatever time and space you actually have, not the time and space you wish you had. The writing will teach you what you need to know, but only if you actually do it. Alright, let's move on to pattern number four.

[00:10:28] Nicole Meier: I have been seeing more and more of this pattern in the past year, and that is I'm working with multiple experts, taking several workshops, enrolled in more than one program for this one manuscript. This is where I see writers getting caught in what I call the too many cooks in the kitchen trap. They're seeking out multiple developmental editors joining several online workshops, participating in overlapping programs, and asking for feedback from anyone who will give it.

[00:11:02] Nicole Meier: On the surface. This looks like dedication to craft improvement, but underneath it's often self-doubt driving the need for constant validation. And this is okay. I think we've all been here as writers at one point or another. But here's what happens. When you have too many voices in your head about one manuscript, you lose sight of your own creative vision.

[00:11:28] Nicole Meier: Every expert has their own perspective, their own preferences, their own ideas of what makes a story work. When you try to incorporate everyone's feedback, you end up with a manuscript that feels like it was written by a committee instead of by you. I've seen writers completely rewrite their opening chapters five different ways based on five different sources of feedback.

[00:11:53] Nicole Meier: The same goes for query letters. I've also seen writers change their entire story structure because one coach suggested it only to change it back again when another coach disagreed. This isn't craft development. This is creative paralysis disguised as productivity. The deeper issue here is trust. When you're constantly seeking out new sources of feedback, you are essentially saying, I don't trust my own judgment and I don't trust the feedback I've already received.

[00:12:26] Nicole Meier: You're looking for someone to tell you definitively that your book is ready, that it's good enough that you can stop worrying now, but no amount of external validation can replace your own creative confidence. Here's what I recommend. Instead, choose one trusted source of professional feedback, whether that's a developmental editor, a skilled critique partner, or a reputable writing coach.

[00:12:54] Nicole Meier: Work with them through the revision process. Trust their guidance, implement their suggestions thoughtfully, and then move forward. Your manuscript doesn't need to be perfect. It needs to be the best version of your unique vision. And that can happen when you trust yourself enough to make creative decisions, even when you can't get everyone to agree that they're the right ones.

[00:13:20] Nicole Meier: Alright, now we're moving on to our final pattern. That's pattern number five, and that is, I don't wanna invest too much energy in this book in case it doesn't work out. This is the writer's version of not wanting to get too attached to someone you're dating in case they break up with you. It's a protection mechanism, but it's also a guarantee that you won't give your work the energy it needs to succeed.

[00:13:46] Nicole Meier: Here's the paradox. The books that work out are almost always the ones their authors believed in wholeheartedly. The books that get agents get published, find readers. Those are the books that their writers poured everything into without holding back. Hedging your bets might protect you from disappointment, but it also protects you from success.

[00:14:09] Nicole Meier: If you're not fully committed to your story, why should anyone else be? If you're not willing to invest your full creative energy into your work, why should an agent invest their professional reputation in it? Let me pause here and offer that. The whole writer approach isn't about being reckless with your emotional energy.

[00:14:29] Nicole Meier: It's about being strategic with your creative investment. Yes, there are no guarantees in publishing. Yes, most books face rejection before they find their home, but the books that succeed are the ones that their authors refused to give up on. Instead of protecting yourself from caring too much, learn to care deeply while also developing resilience, pour your heart into your work and simultaneously build your capacity to handle whatever outcome emerges.

[00:15:01] Nicole Meier: The goal here isn't to care less, it's to care more sustainably. Let me leave you with some closing thoughts as we wrap up today's episode. I want to leave you with this. Every successful writer I know has faced these exact same fears and doubts. Trust me. The difference isn't that they were more talented or lucky.

[00:15:24] Nicole Meier: The difference is that they found ways to move forward despite the uncertainty. Your writing career isn't built on guarantees. It's built on your willingness to keep showing up, to keep learning, to keep improving, and to keep believing in your stories, even when the path gets difficult. Whether you're just starting out or you've been at this for years, remember that building a sustainable writing practice is about more than just the craft.

[00:15:50] Nicole Meier: It's about developing the mindset. The habits and the resilience and the community that will carry you through the inevitable ups and downs of this journey. Before you go, I wanna remind you that each podcast comes with a companion letter over on my substack @nicolemeierwrites, I love to hear from you in the comment section over there, what's working or not working in your creative life right now?

[00:16:16] Nicole Meier: What's fueling your passion? I'd love to know. Until next time, writers keep creating, keep growing, and remember you already have what it takes. You just need to keep showing up. I'm Nicole Meyer and this is the whole writer.

[00:16:36] Nicole Meier: If you want to check out my coaching programs for fiction writers. Visit Nicole meier.com. That's M-E-I-E-R. And if you like this episode, I'd love you to take a minute to leave a rating and review for this podcast. This will help more writers like you to discover the show and to get going on their writing journey.

[00:16:57] Nicole Meier: Thanks so much for listening. Until next time, happy writing everyone.