92. Who Are You Becoming as a Writer?

Here's the question I'm diving into this week on The Whole Writer. Who are you becoming as a writer? Not what are you writing, or how much you're writing, not whether you'll finish that draft or land the agent or get the publishing contract. Who are you becoming? Becoming is about evolution. It's about transformation.

Join me as we take a deeper look.

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Transcript

THE WHOLE WRITER EP 92 - Who Are You Becoming as a Writer?

[00:00:00] Nicole Meier: Here's the question I want you to sit with right now. Who are you becoming as a writer? Not what are you writing, or how much you're writing, not whether you'll finish that draft or land the agent or get the publishing contract. Who are you becoming? Becoming is about evolution. It's about transformation.

[00:00:20] Nicole Meier: It's about who you are at a soul level as you move through your creative life.

[00:00:33] Nicole Meier: Welcome to the whole writer, A place where we talk about what it means to show up as a writer, not just a better writer or a more productive writer or a published writer, but a whole one, someone who's grounded in their voice, in their community, in their creative path. Even when the world tells them to hustle, compare, or conform.

[00:00:54] Nicole Meier: I'm Nicole Meier, a multi published author and book coach who believes that nurturing the person behind the page is just as important as refining the words on it. Each week we'll explore the terrain of writing life with honesty, warmth, and practical wisdom, creating space for you to write from a place of wholeness rather than depletion.

[00:01:14] Nicole Meier: Whether you're drafting your first manuscript or publishing your fifth book, you'll find conversation and companionship for the journey here. So settle in, bring your questions and your curiosity, and let's discover what it means to write and live with authenticity and purpose.

[00:01:34] Nicole Meier: Hello, dear writers, welcome back. I'm so glad you're here. Before we get into today's episode, I wanna ask a small favor and I promise to be gentle about it. This podcast is happily entering. Its second year, and I'm so grateful to be here with you. My intention with both the Whole Writer podcast and my dear whole writer Substack newsletter has always been to help strengthen not only the words on the page, but the creative behind them.

[00:02:02] Nicole Meier: Everything I do is self-funded. I do it with my whole heart because connecting with this community is such a gift to me. So here's my ask. It's a gift from you. If you could press pause right now and leave a rating and review for this podcast, it would help other writers like you to discover the show.

[00:02:24] Nicole Meier: Let's face it, we live in a world of algorithms and every rating helps boost the podcast visibility to writers who might need exactly this kind of nourishing space. Your few words could be the thing that helps writers find their way here. Thank you for considering it and thank you for being here, for listening, for being a part of this community.

[00:02:46] Nicole Meier: I appreciate it all. Okay, let's begin. As we move toward the end of this year, I've been thinking a lot about how we approach this transition with the approach of the new year comes so much noise about goal setting, about productivity systems, about making next year, your year, and while there's nothing wrong with any of that.

[00:03:08] Nicole Meier: I wanna offer you something different Today I wanna talk about becoming, not achieving, not producing, not even growing, exactly. Becoming. So here's the question I want you to sit with right now. Who are you becoming as a writer? Not what are you writing, or how much you're writing, not whether you'll finish that draft or land the agent or get the publishing contract.

[00:03:34] Nicole Meier: Who are you becoming? Because here's what I've noticed. We spend so much time focused on the work, like a lot of time, and the work matters. It absolutely does. But we spend very little time focused on the writer. We're evolving into through that work and that writer, that person you're becoming is actually the most important part of this whole journey.

[00:03:59] Nicole Meier: Guess what? I've got an agent for published novels, a thriving editing business and a podcast. But I am still becoming, I'm still learning lessons. I'm still evolving. I'm the protagonist in my own story. We all are. So let's talk about the difference between goals and becoming. I'll pause here to make a distinction because I know some of you're goal-oriented people, and I don't want you to think I'm dismissing that goals are about destinations.

[00:04:28] Nicole Meier: They're about reaching a specific point. Write 50,000 words. Finish that draft. Query 20 agents. These are measurable, achievable things, and they definitely have their place, but becoming is about evolution. It's about transformation. It's about who you are at a soul level as you move through your creative life.

[00:04:52] Nicole Meier: And here's the really beautiful thing. You can miss a goal and still become exactly who you need to become. You can fail to hit your word count and still evolve into a more authentic, more courageous, more connected writer. I just love that the becoming doesn't require achievement. It requires showing up.

[00:05:16] Nicole Meier: So what does this actually mean? What does it look like to think about who you're becoming? It might mean asking yourself, am I becoming a writer who trusts my own voice? Am I becoming a writer who writes from joy instead of obligation? Am I becoming someone who can hold rejection without letting it define me?

[00:05:36] Nicole Meier: If you feel alone in this question, I'll raise my hand right here and tell you that I've had countless rejections in my writing career. Do you know how many iterations, queries, and almost yeses that came and went for me over the years? The answer is many. They stung. They put me in a spiral of self-doubt and had embarrassed me at times.

[00:06:00] Nicole Meier: But what I've learned was some distance and reflection is that I refused to let my failures or setbacks define me. I am not the sum of my rejections and neither are you. Instead this becoming might mean noticing the small shifts, the way you used to need external validation for every scene, but now you're learning to trust your own judgment, the way you used to compare yourself to everyone.

[00:06:28] Nicole Meier: But now you're more focused on your own path, the way you used to write to prove something, but now you're writing to discover something. That's my favorite one right there. Side note, the writers whose intention is to discover something either about themselves or about the human condition are the ones that I see getting agents and book deals becoming as subtle.

[00:06:54] Nicole Meier: It's not always dramatic. It's the quiet accumulation of tiny choices that shift who you are

[00:07:05] Nicole Meier: writers. If what we're talking about today is resonating with you. This idea of honoring both your craft knowledge and your creative intuition. That's exactly the kind of work I do with writers inside my coaching and editing services. Whether you're looking for a big picture, manuscript evaluation, in depth, developmental edits, or ongoing monthly coaching, my goal is always to help you find clarity, confidence, and momentum in a way that feels creative and authentic to your voice.

[00:07:36] Nicole Meier: You can learn more about these options@nicolemeyer.com.

[00:07:43] Nicole Meier: So as you think about next year, as you think about your creative life moving forward, I wanna invite you to ask yourself some different questions. Not what do I wanna accomplish, but who do I want to become? Do you want to become a writer who creates space for play, who honors rest as part of the process?

[00:08:03] Nicole Meier: Who writes with more tenderness toward yourself? Do you want to become someone who finishes things? Not because finishing is a virtue in itself, but because you want to know what it feels like to see something through. Do you wanna become a writer who can sit with uncertainty, who can hold multiple truths at once?

[00:08:24] Nicole Meier: Who can be both confident and humble? Let me tell you, there are no right answers here. There are only your answers. This is about evolution, not revolution. This becoming, this evolution doesn't require you to burn everything down to start over. You don't need a jaw dropping transformation. Story. Evolution happens in increments.

[00:08:48] Nicole Meier: It happens in the daily return to the page. It happens in the moment. You choose to write the true thing instead of the safe thing. It happens when you let yourself be a beginner again. It happens when you stop performing. Start creating. You are already becoming right now through every choice you make about your creative life.

[00:09:09] Nicole Meier: The question is just, are you becoming someone you want to be? So here's a practice I wanna offer you as we move into this new year together, instead of making a list of writing goals, 'cause we all do it, write yourself a letter from the writer you are becoming. Imagine it's this time next year. Imagine you spent the year of becoming more of who you truly want to be as a writer.

[00:09:33] Nicole Meier: What does that version of you want to tell present day you? What do they know now that you don't know yet? What do they want you to trust? What do they want you to let go of? Write that letter. Let it be as woo woo as you want. Let it be tender. Let it be wise. Then throughout the year, return to it. Not to measure yourself against it, but to remember who you're becoming.

[00:10:02] Nicole Meier: Writers you are in the process of becoming, whether you know it or not, whether you're paying attention to it or not. But when you do pay attention to it, when you do become conscious and intentional about who you're evolving into, something shifts, your writing practice becomes less about proving and more about discovering.

[00:10:22] Nicole Meier: Less about achieving and more about embodying. As this year ends and a new one begins, I encourage you, be gentle with yourself. Honor what you've already become. Trust what you're still becoming, and you don't need to have it all figured out. You just need to keep showing up. Keep choosing yourself. Keep becoming.

[00:10:44] Nicole Meier: All right, let's all take a collective breath together, and thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening. Thank you for listening to yourself. Thank you for trusting me with your time, and thank you for continuing to show up for your creative work in whatever way that looks like for you.

[00:11:02] Nicole Meier: And until next year, please enjoy some replays of some fan favorite episodes while I take the holidays off to reflect on who I'm becoming in the new year. Cheers to you and cheers to another season of the whole writer. If you're craving support and integrating everything we've talked about today. If you want to strengthen your craft without losing the heart of your story, I'd love to walk alongside you through manuscript evaluations, developmental edits, and monthly book coaching.

[00:11:32] Nicole Meier: I help writers like you to create stories that feel whole and alive. You can find all the details@nicolemeyer.com or at the link in the show notes. And of course, if you just want to keep learning together, stay tuned for more episodes like this one.

[00:11:54] Nicole Meier: If you want to check out my coaching programs for fiction writers, visit nicolemeier.com. That's M-E-I-E-R. And if you like this episode, I'd love you to take a minute to leave a rating and review for this podcast. This will help more writers like you to discover the show and to get going on their writing journey.

[00:12:15] Nicole Meier: Thanks so much for listening. Until next time, happy writing everyone.