Speaking With Confidence

Building Resilience and Communication Skills for Student Athletes with Kenisha Brown-Alexander

Tim Newman Season 1 Episode 73

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What does it really take for young professionals—especially student athletes—to build true resilience and open lines of communication in today’s high-pressure world? In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, we dive deep into this crucial question that’s affecting students, educators, coaches, and leaders nationwide.

I’m Tim Newman, your host and a recovering college professor turned communication coach. Today, I’m honored to bring you a candid and impactful conversation with Kenisha Brown-Alexander, a true trailblazer in the sports industry and the founder of the Brainerd Tomorrow Foundation. With a background that spans leading roles for major organizations like the Miami Dolphins, the Super Bowl Committee, and the Orange Bowl Committee, Kenisha also serves as a certified life coach, adjunct professor, and the creator of the Game Changers United program.

Throughout our conversation, Kenisha and I address:

  • The shifting landscape of communication skills among young professionals and why intentional teaching of these skills matters more than ever
  • The logistical and interpersonal challenges of managing thousands of volunteers at a major event like the Super Bowl
  • The critical role of resilience and faith in overcoming personal trauma—and how sports can provide a sense of purpose and belonging
  • How and why Kenisha launched Game Changers United, and the impact it’s having in supporting student athletes’ mental health
  • The realities of suicide and mental health crises among college students, and strategies to strengthen support systems on campuses
  • Why it’s our job as leaders to reach out, show vulnerability, and invite connection
  • The need for early self-discovery and helping young people uncover their “why,” so they can build lasting resilience

If you’re an educator, coach, administrator, parent, or simply someone who cares about the next generation’s well-being, this episode will give you insights, strategies, and real stories to help you foster greater communication, resilience, and support—on and off the field.

For more on Kenisha’s work or to bring Game Changers United to your campus, you can find her on Instagram at @KenishaNichelle, on LinkedIn as Kenisha Brown-Alexander, or visit gamechangersunited.com.

As always, remember—your voice has the power to change the world. Thanks for listening to Speaking with Confidence.

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Tim Newman:

Welcome back to Speaking with Confidence, a podcast that helps you build the soft skills that lead to real results communication, storytelling, public speaking and showing up with confidence in every conversation that counts. I'm Tim Newman, a recovering college professor during communication coach. And I'm Tim Newman, a recovering college professor during communication coach, and I'm thrilled to guide you on a journey to becoming a powerful communicator. Today's guest is Kenesha Brown Alexander. Kenesha is a trailblazer in the sports industry, with experience leading major events for organizations like the Miami Dolphins, the Super Bowl Committee, the Orange Bowl Committee and more. She's a certified life coach, adjunct professor, speaker and founder of the Brighter Tomorrow Foundation, which is dedicated to guiding individuals through life's toughest challenges, transforming pain into purpose, fostering resilience and embracing new beginnings. Through the foundation, her signature program, game Changers United, supports student-athletes in balancing academics, athletics and their personal life by promoting mental well-being and spiritual growth. Her inspiring journey of resilience and faith uplifts others, reminding them that even in life's darkest moments, a brighter tomorrow is always within reach. Kenesha, welcome to the show.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Thank you, Tim. Thank you for having me.

Tim Newman:

Oh, this is going to be a I'd like to say a fun conversation, but we're going to talk about some serious issues that need talked about. I mean ultimately, because for the most part, we as a society, you know, brush these things under the rug or just discount them. But before we really get into some of those issues, I want to talk with you about sports and then we can get into the important things. You know, from a professional perspective, you know you and I have a lot in common. We are both student athletic trainers, we both have sport industry experience and operations, both college professors, et cetera. But what have you seen in terms of the communication skills of young professionals over the last few years?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I mean, if I could be transparent. You know it's it lacking, unfortunately, this generation, you know it's different. That's probably the easiest way that I can put it.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

And that is honestly half the reason why I decided to become an adjunct professor, because, especially in the sports industry not because obviously I can't speak for any others, but here you know it definitely requires, you know, students to step up, to give it all you got to show up, you know, to give the grit. You know they think that it's just all fun and games and while, yes, it's sports and it's fun, you know it definitely requires a level of tenacity in order to be, successful in this industry, and so communication, for one, is something that I believe lacks.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

But I make it a point to emphasize that in my classroom, if you ask any of my students, you know they know, with Professor A it's about the details, it's about you know the little things. I tell them all the time. I will pull up their assignment on the board and I tell them do you see these four bullets? If you follow these four bullets, I promise you will do well in this class or you'll do well on this assignment. But they also know that I do that because that is a going to teach you those interpersonal skills that you're going to need for whatever career that you have. And so you know, I think, that if we all, like persons like you and I and other professors that are out there, you know, are very intentional about the things that are necessary, and they use that in the classroom and utilize that, I think the students will be fine. But it's on them, you know, to step up and want to do this.

Tim Newman:

It really is and you know, what I found over the last few years of my, you know, career in academia was I was spending more time teaching soft skills and communication skills than I was the content and and part of that was because it doesn't really matter what you know if you can't communicate, it doesn't right it really doesn't matter right and you know what we do in the sporting industry. It's not rocket science, it's. It's not like they're going to be doctors.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I mean if that's, that's not like they're gonna be architects and building bridges and you know you've got to be able to have good interpersonal relationship skills.

Tim Newman:

You got to be able to talk to people. You have to be architects and building bridges, and you know you've got to be able to have good interpersonal relationship skills. You got to be able to talk to people. You have to be able to think critically on your feet. All those, all those types of things, but um you know, I tell them all the time.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You know, obviously they're they're young adults, so they're not made to come to class and things like that, and obviously things happen. But I tell them you have to communicate, like you should send me an email to let me know if you're not going to show up to work when you get out of here, like you can't just not show up, right, you have to communicate, that you know. So, just like you said, those interpersonal skills, I'm doing my very best to try to get that ingrained in them in these you know four, four and a half months that they at least take that with them when they leave me and go out into the rest of this world.

Tim Newman:

So, so, let's take that just a step further. And, and you know, you were the manager of the volunteer program for the 2020 Super Bowl, miami, which, but I don't think people understand what an undertaking that that actually is right, um, and? And so you, you're just a manager of one segment of the overall experience of the overall experience, right, right, um so.

Tim Newman:

So give everybody an inside look. You know what did you actually do. How many volunteers was it? I mean, how many different people are you are you dealing with, like? Give us a quick overview of what that's like.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Sure, sure, sure. So I break it down like this Of course everybody knows Super Bowl Sunday. Everybody knows that's the big game. You know that's what we're all here for. But for the city that is hosting the game there's a week long of events. So they may or may not televise that, you may or may not even hear about it. Everybody knows about Sunday, and so for the host city that is hosting the game, they establish a host committee. That are basically the boots on the ground for the NFL, because the league office is in New York so those guys can't move down to the cities where the game is being held, so they have to rely on the host committee to give them direction, to give them guidance.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

They don't know the best restaurants, they don't know the best venues to host. You know all of the different events. So they rely on the host committee to give them some insight. And you know some directives on, you know best experience for them. So, within all of that, you have the volunteer team, the host committee. Let me back up the host committee is actually a nonprofit organization.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

While the NFL is a for-profit, the host committee is a nonprofit. Therefore, that is why there's a need for volunteers, and so the volunteers are helping with the host committee events, because there are actually events that are assigned to the host committee. But then there's also roles that are sometimes even paid positions that are assigned to the host committee. But then there's also roles that are sometimes even paid positions that are available for Super Bowl Sunday. And so, as the manager of our volunteers, we were required well, not required, but we were tasked with recruiting 10,000 volunteers. And that is again because there is Super Bowl Live. Live, which is a free event that the host committee does, that runs the full seven days of Super Bowl week. Then there's the Super Bowl, or now NFL experience. That's usually held at the convention center in that city, and so the NFL asks for volunteers to help support that event. Monday of Super Bowl week is opening night, so that is when the teams are first in town and they're having their media night, and so there's volunteers needed for that. And then, of course, from a hospitality perspective, at the airports, at some of the more popular hotels, there are a need for volunteers Because again, you've got people coming from everywhere, even international, and so they don't know anything about the city, perhaps they've never visited there before. So volunteers are the folks that are familiar with the city. They know the best restaurants, they know where to get your nails done, they know where the barbershops are. They can help from a hospitality perspective for the guests who come into town. And so it's a year long process.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You know we started literally as soon as the former game was over, so for us it was Atlanta. So as soon as that game was over we opened up our portal for volunteers to register. They go through a screening process, they go through a background process, they go through an interview and eventually, you know, we narrow it all the way down. I think our end number was maybe right around 8,300. We didn't quite get 10,000. I think, because Miami has held so many Super Bowls that you know maybe fatigue. But nevertheless you know we've got. We lean on corporations, corporations to bring. They can do it as a group, you know, if they want to do it as a staff outing in the sports, sports management world for colleges, there's colleges that will bring a group of students that want to get that learning experience.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

And so I mean, I would say we had at least 45 universities that would bring a group of students to come down and they, you know, get the experience of, you know, working the Super Bowl game. So yes, it was a daunting task but it's a lot of fun. You know, you meet some great people and a lot of these folks have remained friends of mine throughout the years. I still, you know, keep up with them today. So I love it. It was good yeah.

Tim Newman:

It's, it's, it's. It's a daunting task to to do that. And you know again, just because the Superbowl is over on Sunday at 10, 30, 11 o'clock, your job isn't necessarily over yet because you still have all the wrap up and the clean up and the this and that and, and you know, communication with City Right, those types of things.

Tim Newman:

What about the level of communication that has to take place just in coordinating, let's say, 8,300 volunteers on top of all the other committees and all the other people that are, you know, because that's just one cog in the wheel of that whole event?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, so it definitely requires some management processes, if you will.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

So we use a tool called Rosterfy where the volunteers would have like their own portal, if you will. And so on the backend, on our side, from the staff perspective, we go in and we assign them their shifts and they get the notifications of when their shift is coming. They get all the detailed information as far as parking and meals and all of those things. So it's nearly we were a staff of three, so it was nearly impossible for us to single-handedly try to communicate without having some sort of automated tool, and so that tool was very helpful for us. Even if we had to send out real-time messages or something changed, we could send that alert and they would get a text message.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

So communication is definitely necessary, you know, even for a leadership committee, if you will, and that was 10 individuals that were really strong in various areas and we could communicate to them. And so of those 10, then they had a subset within their group, so they were each assigned to a special sector. Somebody was hospitality, somebody was managing headquarters, someone was managing the uniforms, and so under them then they had captains. So under them they had captains that had their own shifts and schedules, and then you had general volunteers. So it wasn't as if I was directly talking to a general volunteer, I would communicate my information to one of the leads and then the leads would disseminate the information, because it was broken down into smaller groups. So I think it was important for us to establish some sort of workflow in that way, because there's no way that I can have hundreds of people calling me and texting me and trying to reach out to me that you know.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

that was never going to work.

Tim Newman:

It's not going to work, right, but but you know your message has to be really clear. Right, because we know how messages get diluted or words can. Words can be misconstrued one way or the other.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

We've all played the phone tree game.

Tim Newman:

Think about how, how catastrophic that could be If one word is is is messed up or you know. You know is messed up or time is wrong. Think about this. Let's just say the shifts are three hours. You put a shift off by an hour wrong An hour yeah. That matters. It does, it really does.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, I mean it affects anything Parking. You check in all of the things. So, yes, you know we. That's why the leaders that we chose, they had to be strong, they had to be professionals, you know, in their day to day work. So we know that we can rely on them on the details.

Tim Newman:

You know and we talk about how important this stuff is. But you know, I tell students all the time, all the time, that nobody really cares about sports. Nobody cares, and we know this because on super bowl sunday other networks have ratings right. You know, nobody cares how many points somebody scored or who's going to make the playoffs. I mean because in the scheme of life it nobody.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I mean that it doesn't really mean anything, right, it's minor in comparison.

Tim Newman:

It's minor it's minor, um, we care because it's our industry and it's of course, of course but I try and tell students to to get out of that mindset and try and put it in perspective, put it in in into perspective of the people that you're, that you're communicating with so that you know there's that you could build that relationship and so that you can see how it actually does matter and how it does relate to me.

Tim Newman:

Now and I bring this up because now we're going to start getting into some of the serious talk here because you've said that sports saved your life- yeah, yeah. What do you mean by that?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

What do I mean by that? Well, in a nutshell, I lost both of my parents very early in life. So I lost my dad at the age of 12 and my mother at the age of 21. And she passed while I was in college. So you know, I'm a college student, just I don't know nothing, right, I'm trying to figure it all out. And so, unfortunately, you know, I was working as a, well, I was studying to be an athletic trainer and I was a student trainer as well, and I went right back to my responsibilities, but unfortunately, my supervisor wasn't very empathetic to the grief that I was experiencing and just the need for support and just to be loved on by my family, that a request home to see my family was denied. And when she denied that, that was the last day that I was a trainer.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

But that was also the day that I attempted to take my life, because I just felt like, what am I doing this for? You know, I was barely hanging on as is, and you know I hadn't graduated, I hadn't accomplished anything, you know, hadn't gotten married. You know none of the monumental things that you, you know, would do in life. You know those things hadn't happened yet. So you know, I was just confused as to why am I even still here, but gratefully, you know, my life was spared. You know I'm a woman of faith and so I believe that. You know, god knew that I had other things, like the Superbowl we just talked about, on the horizon, but in that experience I came through it.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I ended up transferring schools back to my hometown so I could be closer to my family. But when I transferred, you know I had failed so many classes. You know, just being there taking care of my mother, that I was encouraged to change my major from exercise science to sports administration. When I changed my major, I had to have an internship, and I won't go through the whole story of the internship process because I'll end up dating myself.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

But I ended up landing an internship with the Orange Bowl Committee, which is in Miami, and so I'm originally from Kentucky, so I just call it a blessing that you know I would end up in sunny Florida, of course, right, and then Miami Florida, where it's sunny, like you know, I don't know, 99% of the time. And so having that opportunity, getting down to Miami and it was a double hosting year, which means it was an Orange Bowl game and a national championship. It literally saved my life. You know, which means it was an Orange Bowl game and a national championship. No-transcript, believe that having something that brought me joy outside of you know just the things that I had been through definitely was the saving grace for my life.

Tim Newman:

Yeah, and thank God for that. You know I. You know the. I think we get lost sometimes. You know sports is supposed to be fun.

Tim Newman:

It's supposed to be it's supposed to be. You know the place where we all come together. Yes, but in that you know, taking it just a step further, you know from how a young man a couple weeks ago committed suicide Sad, tragic. Don't have the, the, the skills, don't have the um, the support systems right. And when I say that sports doesn't matter, sometimes, like you said, in in this person's life that was the only thing that was keeping him around, right, right. And you know we've come a long way in how we deal with with mental health and how how we deal with with these types of issues.

Tim Newman:

Talk a little bit about what you're doing, um, in terms of, of helping student athletes, and, and and and the support systems or those that are affiliated with with with athletics.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, so I, obviously I've known that I had some purpose work, right. You know you don't just experience this for the heck of it. You know I don't believe that I'm supposed to have. You know, just live this and just go on.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Like, I definitely know that I'm supposed to do something in a space, but for a while I did not know what that was. So I've always just worked in sports and events and the fun side, the stuff that you know people clap for, the stuff that I don't care about, I'm just, you know, gifted to do it. You know, it don't matter to me, but it was not until December of 2023. And I, you mentioned, I am an adjunct professor, and so December of 2023, as a faculty, I received an email of a young woman. Be honest, you know, obviously we hear about it and we know that it happens, but when it's on your campus and you get the notification, it's a different kind of feeling. And particularly, you know, it took me back to my journey, my own story. You know, I didn't know the young lady. I had one of her teammates in my class. That was about as close as I was, but I knew that, whatever she was going through, she felt that that was the only option and that is what I could relate to.

Tim Newman:

Right.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

And so in that I said, all right, kenesha, you know you've done a lot of great things in sports, it's been a fun ride. But how can we stop this? How can we put it into this, like, what can you do with your voice, your story, your overcoming, to help this? And so there is where my program, the Game Changers United, was initially birthed my purpose in just being a light and being an inspiration in some sort of way. When the pandemic hit and of course we didn't have any sports, I became a certified life coach to help just regular individuals with grief and loss.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

But again, I did not know it was going to morph into this. I knew I wanted to do something, but I didn't know what. And so it's kind of ironic that all of the puzzle pieces start to come together when you find your purpose. But yeah, so I started the Game Changers United program honestly, just for me to have a have a way to support colleges and universities with their initiatives and endeavors. You know, obviously, the NCAA mandates, you know mental health awareness and you know referring their student athletes to the campus counselors or even if they have one in athletics. But what I, what I believe and what I feel is that you know some of these departments. They want to do more but they just don't have the capacity to do so.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You know they don't have the time. You know, if you've got a program with four and 500 athletes and it's only one, maybe two of you, it's not enough. And so that's where I want to support them, Like, hey, I want to use all these years in sports, all these years in events, and to help you create something on your campus so that a Kyron Lacey doesn't happen again, so that they have a place where they know I can be vulnerable, I can be safe, I can share in my experiences with other students here and not feel alone. Because that was my issue.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I felt that I was the only person on this green earth that was having an issue, which was not true, but you feel like that when you're in the middle of your trauma and your experience, and so this is to help mitigate that and to help bring some sort of community on campus so that students don't feel alone as they're experiencing life issues.

Tim Newman:

Yeah, it's something that, obviously, that we really need and it's long overdue. There's so many other issues that go into this because, for whatever reason, each individual situation, either people they don't know how to ask for help, which is a problem they don't know who to ask for help, they don't know what to ask for.

Tim Newman:

And you know, what I've found is that if you just speak up and say I need help, I think there's a ton of people that would say what can I do? But without without you know, knowing how to ask, or knowing who to go to, or whatever.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Or feeling comfortable with that person, that individual.

Tim Newman:

Right, and it's. That's also a problem too, whether it's whether it's a coach, whether it's a strength coach, whether it's the athlete trainer, whether it's a professor, you know what. What's going to be the blowback, Right? Um, and I'm not, I don't want to throw anybody under the bus, but you go to a coach and it says, well, okay, well, you've got these other issues, I'm moving, I'm moving on to somebody else. Oh, that's a real thing, that's a real thing. Or?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

a professor say well, it's not my problem. Yeah, no, I hear that that's part of why we're doing this this way, because they don't feel comfortable going to their coach. They feel what I cause. Again I have student athletes that support me in this and are on the board so I can get their real life insight.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

And they say exactly that they're reluctant to go to their coach because they think there's going to be ramifications they may understand, but then they may think that that means they need time off or they need to pull back on their playing time, and it's like that's not what I'm saying. I just want you to know me as a human being and I want you to know that my mom is sick or my grandma just passed, know that there's other things that happened in my life other than me playing with this ball, and, yeah, that that's a very real thing.

Tim Newman:

You know, and and for the majority of these, these kids, they've got what? Three, four seasons? Yeah, Maybe, maybe, maybe this is their last week. Right, and and you know, there's the pressure that, whether it's the real pressure or the perceived pressure, because there's both.

Tim Newman:

There's both and not knowing how to deal with that Yep, coupled with the societal pressure, coupled with the academic pressure, mm-hmm, there's a lot going on and I think in that entire space there's those pressures and and and things need to be looked at and how, and how we're, how we're approaching them. From the academic piece you know the whole idea of grades I mean, oh, you, you, you better get a good grade. I mean, you better, you better hurry up and get a good grade.

Tim Newman:

Right, you better hurry up, right, and, and do whatever you got to do which leads which also leads to other other behaviors Right, and do whatever you got to do which leads, which also leads to other other behaviors, right, and. And now, all of a sudden, it comes to a head. And now, what are we going to?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

do, and now because now it's a now.

Tim Newman:

It's a problem, right, it wasn't a problem before because we didn't care about it, right, because we, because we didn't care about it, Right, right, right, but, but now, oh, now. Now we didn't care about it right, right, right, but, but now, oh, now, now we have to deal with now we have to do something, as opposed to dealing with some of these other things before they become problems exactly being proactive instead of reactive yeah yeah.

Tim Newman:

so I, you know there's. I love the work that you're doing. What can we do? Or how can we help students to learn how to ask for help? Or you know, because, again, even if let's just say you had, you had a I don't know, yeah, you had one person who. This is the person you go to for help. Ultimately, bureaucracies are bureaucracies, right, and we know what's going to happen. Right, because that's what happens. I mean, that's just what happens, right. How do we, what advice can we give to students to say, okay, it's okay to go to somebody you know, and yes, there's gotta be a comfortability there, but there also has to be somebody who can, who knows and who can actually do something to help.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, so it actually I'm going to flip it. It starts on the side of, I'm going to say, the adult.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

because, even though, these are young adults, it's not of the adult, because, again, what I have discovered, just kind of working with my own student athletes, they're just big kids. They're big, strong, tall, long, wingspan, but they're kids at the end of the day, until 25, 26, and they graduate. They're kids. So it's on the adult in the situation to make themselves available, make themselves vulnerable. They need to share more of their selves in order for the athlete to feel comfortable. Because I can tell you all day that I have the credentials and I mean I'm referring to, like the mental health counselor.

Tim Newman:

Right.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I can tell you all day that I have the credentials. Oh, I'm a licensed therapist and I went to this school and all of these things Right. But if I can't see myself in you or if I can't know that you're safe, I'm not going to come to you. Your credentials mean nothing to me as a 19 year old. So it's on that licensed professional or the coach or whomever to say, hey, you know what, I know what you're going through, because I experienced X, Y and Z.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

One of my favorite phrases that I always share is that there is relatability in vulnerability.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

That if some of the coaches and the staff would take their mask off and show themselves and relate to them and say, hey look, I struggled with this too. Or my girlfriend broke up with me when I was an athlete too, the more that they share, I guarantee you the athletes will be like, oh coach, I didn't know you went through that. Oh man, I didn't know you lost your mom too. When you can be vulnerable and you can share the human side of yourself and not just be seen as an authority, that will open up the door for them to be comfortable and say, hey, look, let me get your thought, Let me talk to you because you you can relate to this and you know, I've seen that personally. You know, the more I started sharing my story, the more people started coming and connecting, and so I just think the same same thought applies to the, the administrators and the coaches. It starts with them in order for the students to be more reluctant to come and speak.

Tim Newman:

Yeah, and I'm glad you brought that up, and I just want to make a couple points here. You know, not everybody's trauma is the same, but it's still trauma.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

It's experience, yeah.

Tim Newman:

And I think a lot of times. What happens is I've been guilty of this, well, okay, but this person over here is going through much worse than you are. You need to get together, and that's not the way that you can do that.

Tim Newman:

Each individual is an individual and each individual experience is their own individual experience and we need to make sure that we approach it from that perspective right and that that that, I think, is key. But I'm also glad that you said that it's up to us as the adults to to move that forward and take that step, and you know I've been saying this for about a number of different issues, not just the the mental health piece health piece but the communication piece it's up to us to, it's no longer just fall in line and get in line and do it because we said it those long days are over, gone.

Tim Newman:

And it's up to us, as the older generation, as the, as the air, everything is, quote leaders to reach out and say, okay, what's going on? This?

Tim Newman:

is how we need to do things, but please give me your feedback, or Right? I mean, tell me what you're feeling, tell me what you're thinking about, whatever it is Right, about the process, about the you know the steps, it doesn't really matter, but we can't just expect things to be done. You know the steps, what doesn't really matter? But we can't just expect things to be done. You know you better and I'm life handing you now. You better hurry up, and you better hurry up and do it, because that's it doesn't work anymore, right, and I, I, I truly believe that if, if, more people from the older generations were to just kind of take a step back, put that, put that ego aside and say you know what.

Tim Newman:

Let's, let's reach out and find out what's actually going on. Let's see. Let's see what they actually think. Let's get. Let's get their thoughts and opinions. You know, I think things would would move forward so much better and everybody would be more productive.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, I mean it's necessary.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

And the longer it takes for these schools to get on board and these you know coaches to open themselves up.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You know, unfortunately you may still have situations like we've been seeing, you know, and so that's why my program is a little different because, again, I have this idea that they're kids, right, so you have to create these environments that are comfortable for them. What does a big kid want to do? They can play games Uno and dominoes and we'll have a game night, or we'll just sit up and have a movie night. You know you have to create the environment that is welcoming for them to want to A come and then B, you know, actually want to have the conversation. So it requires effort, you know. You just can't throw something out there and say, oh, y'all come to circle. They're not doing that, you know. So it requires some strategy and that's why I'm taking the burden off of these athletic departments to say, hey, I have figured it out, I know what they need, so allow us to bring it in and implement it on your campus so that it can be something that is long term.

Tim Newman:

Right yeah, and just so everybody understands this isn't just a Division I major college problem, this is an every college problem.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

It's top to bottom it. I major college problem.

Tim Newman:

This is an every college problem, every college, I mean. You can't go to a college or university or a place of higher education and not find somebody who is in this position.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Right.

Tim Newman:

Because it's just a microcosm of society. Go down the road. It's probably going on in your workplace that you don't know.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Oh yeah, yeah, because it's, it's just a microcosm of society. Go down the road. It's probably going on in in your workplace that you don't know. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, we're just specifically relating to, you know, sports and athletics, but this is everywhere you know, we're in different times now.

Tim Newman:

So let's get together.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, for sure.

Tim Newman:

So talk about resilience, and how can we build that resilience? To, to, to, because it's not like again. You can't just wake up and say, okay, today's better, I'm, I'm, I'm getting over it today and I'm going to get it done. How do we build resilience in young people when they're going through whatever it is? It could be something small, could be something big. Yeah, I mean because, ultimately, you know, we have to move forward, we have to, we have to to get them to understand that, yeah, you got to move forward.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, I think it goes back to what we like to say. You know, in the speaking world, what's your why? You know, why are you doing the things that you do? Because that's going to be the thing that helps you to get out of bed. Not necessarily the absolute, you know, but if you have something bigger than yourself, you have a goal or you have someone that is bigger than you should not be attached to anything monetary, but if you have a reason that you want to keep getting up, that is something that you have to reflect on when those tough times come. And so I've obviously have tried different things and personal endeavors and all of the things, and some have been successful and some haven't.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

But I think the resilience of keeping going when the times get tough and when you're having setbacks and things aren't working out for you, you have to remember what got you started in the first place, you know, because it's not going to be smooth sailing in really anything.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

So you have to remember well, why did I start? Why did I go back to school? Why did I change careers? Why did I, you know, move to this city? You know, you have to remember that part of the thing when adversity strikes, and so you know it may not be something that you overcome instantly, or, you know, within a day, or what have you, you know, but it gives you something to hold on to, it gives you something to remember in those moments as you're still trying to pull yourself, you know, out of that space and get back to you know who you are. So I just think it's important to have a why you know and be, be for real. You know, understand that if it's bigger than you, you know you're more inclined to keep going because somebody or something is dependent on your resiliency.

Tim Newman:

Yeah, and I think the the the piece that I struggle with is, and I keep, I feel like I'm, I feel like my grandfather. You know, young people these days, these kids these days, but I guess, as I was there too is that they don't really know who they are. They don't spend that time thinking about that. Why? Until later in life or until there's a problem, right, and that just makes it so much harder. Just, you know, but you got to have it and maybe that's something that we as a society needs to do a better job of helping the younger generations to start thinking about that, to start thinking about who they are and what their core values are and what gets them going. What, what, what excites them? What, what, what, what are they?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, you have to have an identity in something beyond this. Yeah, you know.

Tim Newman:

I call it the innards, my innards. I mean I know what I'm excited, right, and I know what it is and I know that feeling, I feel it throughout, right, and you got to figure that out. I think that they figured out when they're younger and again, things may change as you get older but if you figured out when you're younger, how much better is life going to be for you Right, if we could start earlier.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

you know there are some thoughts of some thoughts of that. You know this this pathway would be a little more simpler, may not be as rocky as many of us have experienced, but you know, it's all trial and error.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You know, we, even as a child, you know, you try four and five different sports until you find your favorite one and then you keep on going with that till you're ready to get better, um, and do it better.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

So again, I it kind of goes back to the parents, it kind of goes back to you know, your authority figures and your leaders, you know, to help mold and shape and kind of instill that early so that when you get down the road and life really, you know, rubber meets the road, as they say you have something to pull on. But even if you don't, you know, that's why persons like myself and, you know, other people in these spaces are trying to help you to all right. Well, if you didn't get it before, you can get it now, because you still have the rest of your life to live. And so, and these are going to be those skills that you're going to need because life is going to continue to meet you and meet you well, and if you're not ready, you know it could be a setback that you're not prepared for.

Tim Newman:

Yeah, but, and that's the other thing that they have to understand- yeah. It's. Something is going to be happen to them in their life. It's going to happen that they're not going to be prepared for?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, I mean that's called life is what happens.

Tim Newman:

And like you said, having that good grounding having that core you know, for I don't want to speak for you, but for people like you and me who come from the faith background, we have that to to as a I mean for me it's an anchor, yeah, and you know, and I'm not saying people have to do that, I mean it's up.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, of course, of course, we, we, if you come back.

Tim Newman:

You know else, but but yeah you.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

You understand what I'm saying here.

Tim Newman:

Of course you've got to have it. You got to have some anchor, something bigger, yeah, so, uh well, kanesha, thank you so much for for spending some time with us today. I really do appreciate it. Where can people you know work with you or find out what you're doing to get involved? Um, all all the good stuff that you're doing I mean, you're coaching, um helping with with what, what's going on in college campuses when can they?

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

find you.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Yeah, so you can find me personally. I'm on Instagram at Kenesha Nichelle N as in Nancy Nichelle. Linkedin is a good place. To you know, I give a lot of good tips and information about the gang trainers United program, as well as tips and tools for students and student athletes. So Kenesha Brown Alexander on LinkedIn, and then Game Changers United so GameChangersUnitedcom. Game Changers United on Instagram as well. So, yeah, you know, if anybody's interested in connecting and want to learn more or how you could get Game Changers United on your campus, please let's connect because at the at the end of the day, this is about these students. We're just trying to save a life and trying to make sure that they successfully get through their collegiate career.

Tim Newman:

Absolutely, and they have skills to move forward as a good order as well. This is a long-term endeavor.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

For sure, this is a long-term endeavor here, for sure, for sure.

Tim Newman:

Well, again, thanks so much. We'll put those links in the show notes. And again, Kenesha, I really appreciate you coming on and sharing what you're doing. You're doing the work.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

Thank you.

Tim Newman:

And anything I can do for you in the future. You just let me know.

Kenisha Brown-Alexander:

I appreciate it, Tim. Thank you so much.

Tim Newman:

Be sure to visit speakingwithconfidencepodcastcom to get your free ebook Top 21 Challenges for Public Speakers and how to Overcome it. You can also register for the Forming for Public Speaking course. Always remember your voice has the power to change the world. We'll talk to you next time, take care.