That's so Noted

Hi MY DEARS,

Hope all is well! Voting for a black woman for president was a moment of hope that quickly turned into a whirlwind of emotions with the unexpected election results. Join me on this emotional journey as I navigate the aftermath of political upheaval, confronting the harsh realities of those around me who supported an opposing candidate. This episode of That's so Thinkative offers a deeply personal reflection on resilience, particularly the resilience of black women who, despite consistently lifting others, often find themselves let down. I share insights into the emotional toll the election has taken on communities like mine and discuss the necessity of a social media cleanse to protect my mental health.

Switching gears, I open up about my personal growth, revisiting my journey from seeking validation from others to embracing self-love and worth. From humorous tales of past relationships to reflecting on my 2015 goals, I celebrate how far I've come and where I aim to go. You'll also get a glimpse of my passion for basketball, focusing on the LA Clippers' latest games, players, and season highlights. This episode promises a blend of emotional reflection, personal triumphs, and a dash of sports enthusiasm, all woven together to provide an engaging and thought-provoking experience.


TimeCodes:

0:01

Processing Election Results and Moving Forward

7:17

Reflecting on the Notes in my phone

13:20

What's going on with Clippers - Basketball Thoughts

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-da baddest

Transcript

Processing Election Results and Moving Forward

Speaker 1 0:01

Psst , I see stupid people . Hi guys , welcome back to . That's so Thinkative . I'm your host , janelle , aka the Baddest . I hope everyone is doing well and in this episode I'm going to share notes from my phone , like I did in season one . But before I get to that I gotta talk about the election . I gots to talk about the election . It's been a few days so I've had some time to truly process it and truly feel all the feelings . Because the first feeling was fuck all y'all . The first feeling was giving fuck all y'all hoes . But now that I've sat with it and , you know , listened to some podcasts who kind of touched on it and just honestly went on with my life , I'm like , okay , you know what's next .

Speaker 1 1:16

Now , the day of the election , I made it a point to look really cute . I wore a blazer , I dressed in my little fancy little outfit , had my hair laid down , wore makeup , all that , all the nines . I wanted to look really pretty because I'm about to go vote for a black woman for president . So I was so excited I got to leave work early . It was a smooth experience . I did not have no care in the world because all my timeline was filled with Kamala supporters . Like everywhere I went , it was just like , okay , kamala , kamala , kamala . So I just didn't even like fathom . Like it was not like 2016 , where it seemed crazy , like blasphemous , that he would win . Like it was just so absurd that I just didn't even consider it . Because this one in the beginning I was kind of didn't know who was going to get picked . When it was Joe Biden and him , but when it was her , and after the debate and after all of like all of this stuff , I was like yeah , there's just no way people would vote for him again after hearing how he can't even complete a sentence . So I was just like it's , it's going to be OK , this is going to be a step in the right direction . And shout out to Kamala's PR or social media team they were eating , eating so bad and I I commend them from that because that's all I saw on my timeline . So that's probably why I didn't even consider . But also I do have the other side blocked . Like anytime I see anything regarding the other side , I block them . So that could be a big reason why I did not see any of them on my timeline .

Speaker 1 2:45

And so that night when I got home and I saw like the polling , I was kind of getting a little nervous , a little nervous . But then I saw this tiktok and this girl was like there's this blue shift that's going to happen after this red mirage . So it's going to be all . All states are going to be red for a while and then it's just going to be this blue shift because Republicans votes get casted first for some reason . And so I was waiting and waiting and waiting for that blue shift and it never came , and at a certain point I was just like I don't want to keep on feeling like I'm feeling because it was so uncomfortable it was like it wasn't 2016 uncomfortable where I was just like oh my God , oh my God . It was more so like oh , please , god , please , please , and I decided it's time to take myself to bed because I can't do anything about it . I did my part and that's all I can really do .

Speaker 1 3:35

And so I tried to go to sleep and I was waking up to fireworks . So I thought , oh wait , hold on , hold on . When I looked , looked last it wasn't looking too good for my girl , but why would they be shooting fireworks in my area if it wasn't , you know , a win for us . So I quickly checked my phone , saw the results , turned my phone off , looked up to the ceiling and cried . I cried because now I feel like the people who look like me are going to be on tens even more , and it's just a scary , fearful thought that so many people are going to be affected and and hurt by this and this , this , this , this decision and what is going to mean for the future . And I was just feeling so overwhelmed with all these things that are so far out of my control for the future . And I was just feeling so overwhelmed with all these things that are so far out of my control and I tried to sleep .

Speaker 1 4:27

I had the worst dream ever that you can have . All my exes was in my dream , bitch . It was awful . It was awful . I woke up like this is awful . But the next day was worse . The next day was worse because I did not know I knew so many Trump supporters , did not know that I had to block so many people . This girl on TikTok said go check who's following him and go unfollowing . Unfollow them . I didn't just unfollow them , I blocked them . It was somebody in my close friends that was a Trump supporter girl my close friends and it's only like not my actual close friends , let's not , let's not do that but the close friends on Instagram it was . I have like 20 people in there and one of them was following that man and I was like absolutely not women , non-black women , um , men , dumb men , all I just like y'all are so stupid , it's so stupid . So it was . It was really appalling to see how many people were into that and how many people had to unfollow and blog .

Speaker 1 5:30

But we move on . We move on . We like always black women and black people , black women in particular . We showed up for what we needed to do . We always show up for everybody else and ourselves . Well , we always show up for everybody else and ourselves . Well , we always show up for everybody else , hoping that they'll help , hoping that they'll show up for us for once .

Speaker 1 5:50

But again , you know , I think the most frustrating part is just a reminder to black women in particular that we're just never enough . We're never enough and I don't really think of it as they hate us anymore . I'm just , I'm going to take it as if they just not like us . They just not like us and I'm not going to be that person who's just like . You know , it's me versus , it's us versus them at all times , because I don't ever want to get to that place , but it was . It was a really . I was really angry . I was really angry , and I'm allowed to be angry , and that's okay . Now I feel a little better and life goes on . Life goes on . I'm wishing you so much love during this time , these next few years , and , girl , yeah , yeah . I'm glad I got that off my chest , though , because it was . It was bothering me . Let's get into this episode . So I wanted to share my notes , because I love being an oversharer , so I'm going to share two notes in my phone , and maybe three , let's see . Let's see how we're feeling . Okay , let's see how we're feeling . Let's share the first one , though , okay , okay . This first note was written April 19th 2016 at 102 AM . This was a few days before my birthday .

Reflecting on the Notes in my phone

Speaker 1 7:17

I have always seeked love waiting by the phone for a text or a call , waiting for those moments you see on TV where the boy finally sees a friend . That's more than just a friend . I have embarrassed myself for love . I have let my pride and insecurities destroy relationships . I have settled in arms that never wanted me . I have constructed a life with me and him in nights before my bed , knowing that he will never want me the way I want him . I have cried a lot over a boy who never gave me a second thought . I have allowed him to make me feel so small , but today I choose to be loved , not by him , not by anyone but me .

Speaker 1 7:57

So this note in particular stood out to me because it reminds me of a version of me that I am constantly trying to understand and nurture and love and show appreciation to , but also , like girl , chill out . Um , this version of me that I that is so insecure and so desperate for love that she's willing to settle in places that don't necessarily feed her or value her . This version of me that is so gung-ho about this happy ending and this picture-perfect life or love that she thinks she wants and all this stuff , just trying to understand that version of me and not be so hard on her so much . I think I've spent a lot of my time centering men , making them my priority , forgetting all about myself and that note is a clear example of that but also me kind of like recognizing that I need to focus on myself and I need to love myself first , and it's so annoying to say that so much . It's so annoying to be like I need to do that , like I don't think it's wrong for me to want love . I don't think it's wrong for me to want these things , but it comes to a point where I'm sacrificing myself and sacrificing how I feel about myself and my self-esteem just for an ounce of someone to show love for me or some kind of validation from someone else outside of me , especially men . So yeah , girl , I she comes up from time to time , but I know how to like . I know how to move around her more .

Speaker 1 9:47

The next note was written January 5th 2015 , 2015 , 6.44 pm . So this is about what year we in . Nine years ago I was at a community college . It was like probably my first real year , our first full year . So goals in 2015 . Get a 3.0 GPA or above spring semester . I did that . I ate that up . I think I got like a 3.7 . Get a B in stats . I got a C in stats and that was the only C I ever got in college and I was pissed . Get an A in English . Did that ? Never say sorry or make yourself small ? Still , working on that one , become a better basketball player , I quit . Become a better shooter from mid-range Nope , I'm not Paul George or DeMar DeRozan . Didn't do that . Get better from three Nope , can't . Didn't do that . Better finisher I think I got better towards the end . Become more aware and a better passer I think I got better at passing . I think I got a little better when I was the next year . Become more confident Eight that one up . Eight that one up . 2015 would look at me and be like who the hell is this bitch ? Yeah , yeah . Stay focused on your goals . This one I'm still working on Discipline is it's , it's , it's , it's tough , tough , it's tough , but I've gotten a lot better at that . Love yourself . Eating that one up , too . Eating that one up , too .

Speaker 1 11:17

Staying off social media so much I'm doing that right now . I'm actually off of social media . I'm having Asia's shout out to Asia . She's handily on my socials right now . So go out more . Definitely doing that . I've definitely been going out a lot more in the past few years , especially by living alone , just like trying to go meet new people and going out to clubs by myself and just doing all these things . I love doing that . I've been doing that . Haven't been doing that so much recently , but that's just because it's a lot . Every time I go outside it's like a hundred dollars . So become more comfortable with myself . Every day I get a little better at that . So I think I'm doing that , those lists . There's a few things that don't apply anymore , but most of these things still apply and I'm still getting better at these things . So shout out to me Now .

Speaker 1 12:07

This one isn't necessarily a note , it's just extremely funny . Okay , so on June 25th of some year , I wrote I threw away your toothbrush . Giving you it's pretty much giving . Like Summer Walker , I threw away your love letters . I thought it'd make me feel better . It's very much so , given session 32 . And then now , a week later , a week later after I threw away that toothbrush , july 2nd of the same year , we had sex . It was great Bitch . It was great bitch . A week , a week later , you didn't even give it . A month . A week later , oh my god , my girl was going through it . She was going through it anyways . That's it for the notes that I have in my phone . I think that that that's enough for now . That's enough for now . I didn't get any submissions for the question of the week where you get to share some of your notes in your phone . I get it . I get it , but next week , let's , let's see if we can get some , some submissions

What's going on with Clippers - Basketball Thoughts

Speaker 1 13:20

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Speaker 1 13:22

To wrap this episode up , I want to start this segment called what's going on with the Clippers . If you guys don't know , I'm a diehard Clipper fan . I've been a Clipper fan since I was 14 . It's a whole . It's a whole thing . It's a whole thing . So I wanted to start this segment where I kind of , here and there , talk about how I'm building , about the Clippers and you know , just giving my little thoughts around the league . So let's , let's , let's , let's chat about it really quickly . If you're not into basketball , I completely understand , but I am , so I actually let's take that back . I actually have been taking a real step back towards basketball . I used to have NBA League pass and Clipper Vision . I canceled both of my subscriptions just because I wasn't watching it frequently enough and basketball has not been as exciting to me as it once was . Like I used to be so excited about basketball and watching games and stuff like that . The NBA , for me , it's just , I don't know . It has its moments and it's just a thing . I think towards the end of the season is when it starts to really feel like okay , this is what I want to see , you know , and that's just what it is .

Speaker 1 14:31

Some notes I have for the Clippers is shout-out to Jeff Van Gundy . I did not know that we picked him up during the summer , but I think he's our defensive coordinator and our defense has looked really good this season . I saw one of the commentators say that we have one of the best defensive teams through the first three quarters . The first three quarters is crazy . So shout out to Norman Powell . His game this season so far has been so good . He was so good . He's been so good with the Clippers since coming . Let's just be real , he's just a great player . He's from California . He's just a great player .

Speaker 1 15:13

But it's amazing to see how much circumstances play in a player's visibility , because you really won't know how great a player is if he doesn't get all the playing time that he deserves . And Norman Powell starting now , I think , because Kawhi is out has really shown just how great he is . Even last year I knew he was great , but it's just like 37 points the other day and it's like he's doing it on not shooting a lot , like it'd be like six shots and he already has like 15 points , like bro , what that's . So if that's crazy , it's giving kairi irving , because you know kairi is good for not shooting a lot but having a lot of points . I think he just had like 50 points a couple days ago . I don't even know , and it's crazy .

Speaker 1 15:50

Amir Coffey shout out to Amir Coffey he's another one of those players that you just you got to know , to know , and since coming on the Clippers every time , every year , he gets better and better . He always is like a bright spot in every Clipper season . So really like them him and Terrence Mann . I want Terrence Mann to become more of a scorer , but his defensive thing just makes up for everything , so I really don't care . He had a play or a sequence toward the end of the game in one of these games I was watching Can't remember , they all blend together and he was the sole reason why we ended up winning that game towards the end , because he was stopping everybody .

Speaker 1 16:31

I do like the two pickup . Well , we have three , three different pickups Chris Dunn , kevin Porter Jr , derek Jones like those pickups looking good did not like that . They were booing Paul George when he came back . I just think that's unnecessary . If you're not going to pay the man , that's his . He has every right to leave .

Speaker 1 16:49

Zubac Zoo . I love Zoo . I love Zoo so much . Love his game . Thank you , lakers , love his game . I did not know he had this kind of court vision , did not know that . So that's been really interesting to see . And anytime Harden is paired with the big , he makes that big a lot better and he shows them how good that big actually is . So shout out to Harden as well . But yeah , that's , that's all I have to say .

Speaker 1 17:17

With what's going on with the Clippers , I'm liking what I'm seeing so far , even without Kawhi , which we always do , that we're always good without our best players , and then when our best players come , it's like everybody forgets how great they were and they just like chill out , no , push forward , babe , keep on going . Oh , one last thing this is around the league . Note that I want to say . I know a lot of people would hate the Celtics for whatever reason they have , and I understand it , none of my business , but a lot of you niggas are just jealous of Jason Tatum . He's handsome , he plays basketball really well and his girl is beautiful . They're haters . They're just haters because ain't no way he has accomplished all he's accomplished and y'all not acting like he , not who he say he is . Stop playing with the man . Stop playing with the man , right , all right , that's all I gotta say .

Speaker 1 18:08

Well , that's the end of this episode . I hope you guys enjoyed it . I'm wishing you nothing but love and I hope to see you next week . Please like , comment , subscribe , rate , send you , send me a dm , whatever you feel . I really appreciate you listening , so thank you , bye .