That's so Noted

Hi MY DEARS,

Hope all is well! Voting for a black woman for president was a moment of hope that quickly turned into a whirlwind of emotions with the unexpected election results. Join me on this emotional journey as I navigate the aftermath of political upheaval, confronting the harsh realities of those around me who supported an opposing candidate. This episode of That's so Thinkative offers a deeply personal reflection on resilience, particularly the resilience of black women who, despite consistently lifting others, often find themselves let down. I share insights into the emotional toll the election has taken on communities like mine and discuss the necessity of a social media cleanse to protect my mental health.

Switching gears, I open up about my personal growth, revisiting my journey from seeking validation from others to embracing self-love and worth. From humorous tales of past relationships to reflecting on my 2015 goals, I celebrate how far I've come and where I aim to go. You'll also get a glimpse of my passion for basketball, focusing on the LA Clippers' latest games, players, and season highlights. This episode promises a blend of emotional reflection, personal triumphs, and a dash of sports enthusiasm, all woven together to provide an engaging and thought-provoking experience.


TimeCodes:

0:01

Processing Election Results and Moving Forward

7:17

Reflecting on the Notes in my phone

13:20

What's going on with Clippers - Basketball Thoughts

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THANK YOU FOR LISTENING MY DEAR!!

-da baddest

Chapters

• 0:01 Processing Election Results and Moving Forward
• 7:17 Reflecting on the Notes in my phone
• 13:20 What's going on with Clippers - Basketball Thoughts

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Psst, I see stupid people. Hi guys, welcome back to. That's so Thinkative. I'm your host, janelle, aka the Baddest. I hope everyone is doing well and in this episode I'm going to share notes from my phone, like I did in season one. But before I get to that I gotta talk about the election. I gots to talk about the election. It's been a few days so I've had some time to truly process it and truly feel all the feelings. Because the first feeling was fuck all y'all. The first feeling was giving fuck all y'all hoes. But now that I've sat with it and, you know, listened to some podcasts who kind of touched on it and just honestly went on with my life, I'm like, okay, you know what's next.

Speaker 1: 1:16

Now, the day of the election, I made it a point to look really cute. I wore a blazer, I dressed in my little fancy little outfit, had my hair laid down, wore makeup, all that, all the nines. I wanted to look really pretty because I'm about to go vote for a black woman for president. So I was so excited I got to leave work early. It was a smooth experience. I did not have no care in the world because all my timeline was filled with Kamala supporters. Like everywhere I went, it was just like, okay, kamala, kamala, kamala. So I just didn't even like fathom. Like it was not like 2016, where it seemed crazy, like blasphemous, that he would win. Like it was just so absurd that I just didn't even consider it. Because this one in the beginning I was kind of didn't know who was going to get picked. When it was Joe Biden and him, but when it was her, and after the debate and after all of like all of this stuff, I was like yeah, there's just no way people would vote for him again after hearing how he can't even complete a sentence. So I was just like it's, it's going to be OK, this is going to be a step in the right direction. And shout out to Kamala's PR or social media team they were eating, eating so bad and I I commend them from that because that's all I saw on my timeline. So that's probably why I didn't even consider. But also I do have the other side blocked. Like anytime I see anything regarding the other side, I block them. So that could be a big reason why I did not see any of them on my timeline.

Speaker 1: 2:45

And so that night when I got home and I saw like the polling, I was kind of getting a little nervous, a little nervous. But then I saw this tiktok and this girl was like there's this blue shift that's going to happen after this red mirage. So it's going to be all. All states are going to be red for a while and then it's just going to be this blue shift because Republicans votes get casted first for some reason. And so I was waiting and waiting and waiting for that blue shift and it never came, and at a certain point I was just like I don't want to keep on feeling like I'm feeling because it was so uncomfortable it was like it wasn't 2016 uncomfortable where I was just like oh my God, oh my God. It was more so like oh, please, god, please, please, and I decided it's time to take myself to bed because I can't do anything about it. I did my part and that's all I can really do.

Speaker 1: 3:35

And so I tried to go to sleep and I was waking up to fireworks. So I thought, oh wait, hold on, hold on. When I looked, looked last it wasn't looking too good for my girl, but why would they be shooting fireworks in my area if it wasn't, you know, a win for us. So I quickly checked my phone, saw the results, turned my phone off, looked up to the ceiling and cried. I cried because now I feel like the people who look like me are going to be on tens even more, and it's just a scary, fearful thought that so many people are going to be affected and and hurt by this and this, this, this, this decision and what is going to mean for the future. And I was just feeling so overwhelmed with all these things that are so far out of my control for the future. And I was just feeling so overwhelmed with all these things that are so far out of my control and I tried to sleep.

Speaker 1: 4:27

I had the worst dream ever that you can have. All my exes was in my dream, bitch. It was awful. It was awful. I woke up like this is awful. But the next day was worse. The next day was worse because I did not know I knew so many Trump supporters, did not know that I had to block so many people. This girl on TikTok said go check who's following him and go unfollowing. Unfollow them. I didn't just unfollow them, I blocked them. It was somebody in my close friends that was a Trump supporter girl my close friends and it's only like not my actual close friends, let's not, let's not do that but the close friends on Instagram it was. I have like 20 people in there and one of them was following that man and I was like absolutely not women, non-black women, um, men, dumb men, all I just like y'all are so stupid, it's so stupid. So it was. It was really appalling to see how many people were into that and how many people had to unfollow and blog.

Speaker 1: 5:30

But we move on. We move on. We like always black women and black people, black women in particular. We showed up for what we needed to do. We always show up for everybody else and ourselves. Well, we always show up for everybody else and ourselves. Well, we always show up for everybody else, hoping that they'll help, hoping that they'll show up for us for once.

Speaker 1: 5:50

But again, you know, I think the most frustrating part is just a reminder to black women in particular that we're just never enough. We're never enough and I don't really think of it as they hate us anymore. I'm just, I'm going to take it as if they just not like us. They just not like us and I'm not going to be that person who's just like. You know, it's me versus, it's us versus them at all times, because I don't ever want to get to that place, but it was. It was a really. I was really angry. I was really angry, and I'm allowed to be angry, and that's okay. Now I feel a little better and life goes on. Life goes on. I'm wishing you so much love during this time, these next few years, and, girl, yeah, yeah. I'm glad I got that off my chest, though, because it was. It was bothering me. Let's get into this episode. So I wanted to share my notes, because I love being an oversharer, so I'm going to share two notes in my phone, and maybe three, let's see. Let's see how we're feeling. Okay, let's see how we're feeling. Let's share the first one, though, okay, okay. This first note was written April 19th 2016 at 102 AM. This was a few days before my birthday.

Speaker 1: 7:17

I have always seeked love waiting by the phone for a text or a call, waiting for those moments you see on TV where the boy finally sees a friend. That's more than just a friend. I have embarrassed myself for love. I have let my pride and insecurities destroy relationships. I have settled in arms that never wanted me. I have constructed a life with me and him in nights before my bed, knowing that he will never want me the way I want him. I have cried a lot over a boy who never gave me a second thought. I have allowed him to make me feel so small, but today I choose to be loved, not by him, not by anyone but me.

Speaker 1: 7:57

So this note in particular stood out to me because it reminds me of a version of me that I am constantly trying to understand and nurture and love and show appreciation to, but also, like girl, chill out. Um, this version of me that I that is so insecure and so desperate for love that she's willing to settle in places that don't necessarily feed her or value her. This version of me that is so gung-ho about this happy ending and this picture-perfect life or love that she thinks she wants and all this stuff, just trying to understand that version of me and not be so hard on her so much. I think I've spent a lot of my time centering men, making them my priority, forgetting all about myself and that note is a clear example of that but also me kind of like recognizing that I need to focus on myself and I need to love myself first, and it's so annoying to say that so much. It's so annoying to be like I need to do that, like I don't think it's wrong for me to want love. I don't think it's wrong for me to want these things, but it comes to a point where I'm sacrificing myself and sacrificing how I feel about myself and my self-esteem just for an ounce of someone to show love for me or some kind of validation from someone else outside of me, especially men. So yeah, girl, I she comes up from time to time, but I know how to like. I know how to move around her more.

Speaker 1: 9:47

The next note was written January 5th 2015, 2015, 6.44 pm. So this is about what year we in. Nine years ago I was at a community college. It was like probably my first real year, our first full year. So goals in 2015. Get a 3.0 GPA or above spring semester. I did that. I ate that up. I think I got like a 3.7. Get a B in stats. I got a C in stats and that was the only C I ever got in college and I was pissed. Get an A in English. Did that? Never say sorry or make yourself small? Still, working on that one, become a better basketball player, I quit. Become a better shooter from mid-range Nope, I'm not Paul George or DeMar DeRozan. Didn't do that. Get better from three Nope, can't. Didn't do that. Better finisher I think I got better towards the end. Become more aware and a better passer I think I got better at passing. I think I got a little better when I was the next year. Become more confident Eight that one up. Eight that one up. 2015 would look at me and be like who the hell is this bitch? Yeah, yeah. Stay focused on your goals. This one I'm still working on Discipline is it's, it's, it's, it's tough, tough, it's tough, but I've gotten a lot better at that. Love yourself. Eating that one up, too. Eating that one up, too.

Speaker 1: 11:17

Staying off social media so much I'm doing that right now. I'm actually off of social media. I'm having Asia's shout out to Asia. She's handily on my socials right now. So go out more. Definitely doing that. I've definitely been going out a lot more in the past few years, especially by living alone, just like trying to go meet new people and going out to clubs by myself and just doing all these things. I love doing that. I've been doing that. Haven't been doing that so much recently, but that's just because it's a lot. Every time I go outside it's like a hundred dollars. So become more comfortable with myself. Every day I get a little better at that. So I think I'm doing that, those lists. There's a few things that don't apply anymore, but most of these things still apply and I'm still getting better at these things. So shout out to me Now.

Speaker 1: 12:07

This one isn't necessarily a note, it's just extremely funny. Okay, so on June 25th of some year, I wrote I threw away your toothbrush. Giving you it's pretty much giving. Like Summer Walker, I threw away your love letters. I thought it'd make me feel better. It's very much so, given session 32. And then now, a week later, a week later after I threw away that toothbrush, july 2nd of the same year, we had sex. It was great Bitch. It was great bitch. A week, a week later, you didn't even give it. A month. A week later, oh my god, my girl was going through it. She was going through it anyways. That's it for the notes that I have in my phone. I think that that that's enough for now. That's enough for now. I didn't get any submissions for the question of the week where you get to share some of your notes in your phone. I get it. I get it, but next week, let's, let's see if we can get some, some submissions.

Speaker 1: 13:22

To wrap this episode up, I want to start this segment called what's going on with the Clippers. If you guys don't know, I'm a diehard Clipper fan. I've been a Clipper fan since I was 14. It's a whole. It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. So I wanted to start this segment where I kind of, here and there, talk about how I'm building, about the Clippers and you know, just giving my little thoughts around the league. So let's, let's, let's, let's chat about it really quickly. If you're not into basketball, I completely understand, but I am, so I actually let's take that back. I actually have been taking a real step back towards basketball. I used to have NBA League pass and Clipper Vision. I canceled both of my subscriptions just because I wasn't watching it frequently enough and basketball has not been as exciting to me as it once was. Like I used to be so excited about basketball and watching games and stuff like that. The NBA, for me, it's just, I don't know. It has its moments and it's just a thing. I think towards the end of the season is when it starts to really feel like okay, this is what I want to see, you know, and that's just what it is.

Speaker 1: 14:31

Some notes I have for the Clippers is shout-out to Jeff Van Gundy. I did not know that we picked him up during the summer, but I think he's our defensive coordinator and our defense has looked really good this season. I saw one of the commentators say that we have one of the best defensive teams through the first three quarters. The first three quarters is crazy. So shout out to Norman Powell. His game this season so far has been so good. He was so good. He's been so good with the Clippers since coming. Let's just be real, he's just a great player. He's from California. He's just a great player.

Speaker 1: 15:13

But it's amazing to see how much circumstances play in a player's visibility, because you really won't know how great a player is if he doesn't get all the playing time that he deserves. And Norman Powell starting now, I think, because Kawhi is out has really shown just how great he is. Even last year I knew he was great, but it's just like 37 points the other day and it's like he's doing it on not shooting a lot, like it'd be like six shots and he already has like 15 points, like bro, what that's. So if that's crazy, it's giving kairi irving, because you know kairi is good for not shooting a lot but having a lot of points. I think he just had like 50 points a couple days ago. I don't even know, and it's crazy.

Speaker 1: 15:50

Amir Coffey shout out to Amir Coffey he's another one of those players that you just you got to know, to know, and since coming on the Clippers every time, every year, he gets better and better. He always is like a bright spot in every Clipper season. So really like them him and Terrence Mann. I want Terrence Mann to become more of a scorer, but his defensive thing just makes up for everything, so I really don't care. He had a play or a sequence toward the end of the game in one of these games I was watching Can't remember, they all blend together and he was the sole reason why we ended up winning that game towards the end, because he was stopping everybody.

Speaker 1: 16:31

I do like the two pickup. Well, we have three, three different pickups Chris Dunn, kevin Porter Jr, derek Jones like those pickups looking good did not like that. They were booing Paul George when he came back. I just think that's unnecessary. If you're not going to pay the man, that's his. He has every right to leave.

Speaker 1: 16:49

Zubac Zoo. I love Zoo. I love Zoo so much. Love his game. Thank you, lakers, love his game. I did not know he had this kind of court vision, did not know that. So that's been really interesting to see. And anytime Harden is paired with the big, he makes that big a lot better and he shows them how good that big actually is. So shout out to Harden as well. But yeah, that's, that's all I have to say.

Speaker 1: 17:17

With what's going on with the Clippers, I'm liking what I'm seeing so far, even without Kawhi, which we always do, that we're always good without our best players, and then when our best players come, it's like everybody forgets how great they were and they just like chill out, no, push forward, babe, keep on going. Oh, one last thing this is around the league. Note that I want to say. I know a lot of people would hate the Celtics for whatever reason they have, and I understand it, none of my business, but a lot of you niggas are just jealous of Jason Tatum. He's handsome, he plays basketball really well and his girl is beautiful. They're haters. They're just haters because ain't no way he has accomplished all he's accomplished and y'all not acting like he, not who he say he is. Stop playing with the man. Stop playing with the man, right, all right, that's all I gotta say.

Speaker 1: 18:08

Well, that's the end of this episode. I hope you guys enjoyed it. I'm wishing you nothing but love and I hope to see you next week. Please like, comment, subscribe, rate, send you, send me a dm, whatever you feel. I really appreciate you listening, so thank you, bye.