Resilience and Recovery: Coping with The Results of the 2024 Election

In this powerful episode, we explore the emotional aftermath of the 2024 presidential election and 2025 inauguration. For many women, this election felt deeply personal, bringing up grief, anger, and fear for what lies ahead. Together, we unpack these emotions, validate their significance, and discuss actionable strategies to move forward with resilience and purpose.

Key Topics Covered:

1. Naming Our Emotions:
   • Recognizing grief in its many forms—ambiguous, collective, and anticipatory—and understanding how it impacts us physically, emotionally, and relationally.
2. Journaling for Healing:
   • Structured prompts to process feelings and explore values, beliefs, and resilience.
3. Creative Expression:
   • Using art, music, or writing to process grief and cope with uncertainty.
4. Mindfulness Techniques:
   • Learn the grounding 5-4-3-2-1 technique and the STOP skill to regulate emotions during stressful moments.
5. Navigating Relationships:
   • Questions to reflect on maintaining or distancing relationships in a divided political climate.
6. Community and Connection:
   • The importance of fostering supportive connections and joining communities for collective action.
7. News Consumption and Balance:
   • Setting boundaries to protect your mental health while staying informed.
8. Transforming Grief into Empowerment:
   • Taking control of what you can, from small self-care steps to advocacy for causes you care about.

Grief, anger, and fear in the wake of the election are valid. By naming our emotions, practicing self-compassion, and taking intentional steps toward healing and action, we can reclaim our strength and create positive change. Remember, self-care and advocacy are acts of resilience and defiance.

🎙️ Tune in now on all major podcast platforms!
💬 Share your reflections and join the conversation using #HerTimeTherapy.

Additional Resources:

Book an appointment with Rhiannon, our art therapist.

Advocacy:

• https://www.humanrightscareers.com/magazine/organizations-gender-equality/
• https://sheshouldrun.org/
• https://www.girlsinc.org/
• https://www.globalfundforwomen.org/
• https://www.wfco.org/

Transcript

0:28

Today, we're diving into a topic that's on a lot of our minds. Coping with the emotional aftermath of the 2024 presidential election and the 2025 inauguration. For many of us, the results of this election has brought up feelings of grief, anger, and a lot of fear for what lies ahead. Let's unpack that together, explore why these emotions are valid, and discuss strategies to move forward with resilience and purpose. First, let's name what we're feeling. For many women, this election felt deeply personal, because it is. A guiding principle in feminist therapy is that the personal is political, and in a patriarchal society, political losses often translate to very personal ones. This goes far beyond, your candidate didn't win, and we're upset about that. What we're talking about here is real threats to our bodily autonomy, healthcare, and our fundamental human rights. These are not abstract issues. They affect our day to day lives. So what we're experiencing here is grief, and it's actually not even just one kind of grief that is present for women right now. There's ambiguous grief for losses that we can't fully define yet. There's collective grief shared with women across the country, and even anticipatory grief as we brace for future challenges that are not fully known yet. Naming these emotions and recognizing their validity is a really vital first step for all of us. to move towards healing and action. Grief and collective trauma often show up in ways that we don't expect. Physically, you might notice fatigue, headaches, or even a sense of heaviness throughout your body. Emotionally, grief can bring a host of different feelings, including anger, disbelief, or hopelessness. Relationally, it might also cause us to withdraw or become more reactive with loved ones. And then there's what we call high functioning depression. you're going through the motions, going to work, attending to family obligations, but everything just feels muted if you're experiencing that high functioning depression. The sparkle is gone, and even small tasks might feel overwhelming. These feelings are normal and expected after a significant loss. But if they persist or they worsen over the months to come, it's really important to reach out for professional support. So how do we cope with all of this grief and potentially depression and anxiety? We start with self compassion. Allow yourself to feel and process these emotions without judgment. One way you can do this is through journaling. It doesn't necessarily need to be a structured task, it can be a free flowing outlet for your thoughts and feelings. But for those who do need structured journal prompts, here's a few that you may consider. What emotions am I experiencing as I reflect on the election results, and where do I feel these emotions in my body? So essentially, with this one, you write about the grief, the fear, the anger, or other emotions that you may be feeling when you think about this topic, or if you see news related to this topic. Consider how these emotions are showing up physically and mentally, and explore their impact on your life. Bringing awareness to these symptoms are the first step to managing them. Number two, how do these election results challenge or reaffirm my values, beliefs, or sense of safety in my community? And what steps can I take to stay grounded in what matters most to me? This journal prompt, encourages you to really reflect on the ways that results align or conflict with your personal values. the rights that you hold dear, and even your perception of others in the society that you live in. Then it encourages you to try to identify specific ways to reconnect with your inner strength or support causes that uphold your beliefs. Examples of this could include things like going to therapy, connecting with a group of like minded friends, or scheduling a series of self care activities like group exercise classes or mental health days. A third journal prompt that may help you process this is, what does resilience look like for me in this moment, and how can I create a space of safety, comfort, or hope in the face of uncertainty? With this one, we explore what resilience means to you personally during this time, and this can be small, so look at the small, actionable ways to care for yourself, such as connecting with loved ones, participating in activism, or finding solace in creating spiritual practices or artwork. In addition to journaling, We encourage trying creative expression to cope with grief and the distressing symptoms produced by it. You don't need to be an artist to process grief creatively. Any time that you dedicate to creating something, whether it's art, music, writing, or even something completely abstract, it all counts. And if you want to try this but feel stuck, try attending something like a sip and paint class or a creative course at your local community college that really guides you through creating a piece of artwork. And if that's not really your thing, we also have a great art therapist on staff at Her Time Therapy. So reach out to us and ask for a consultation with our art therapist, Rhiannon. Another powerful tool to managing grief and anxiety about what comes next is mindfulness. With this, we want to try setting a reminder on your phone, maybe three times a day to start, that prompts you to just take five minutes to stop whatever you're doing and just notice what's happening for you emotionally, mentally, and physically. During this pause, engage in some deep breathing exercises, like boxed breathing, or the grounding exercise that we call the 1 method. Both of these can really help regulate your emotions and calm your nervous system down in the moment. Let's take a moment to practice the 1 technique right now. This exercise can be great for calming anxiety and bringing yourself back to the present moment. So go ahead and take a deep breath in. and let it out, and let's begin. Take a moment to look around you and name five things that you can see. These can be as simple as a book on the table, the color of the walls, or a tree outside your window. Take time to really just notice and name each thing that you see. Now, focus on four things that you can feel. Maybe it's the texture of your clothing, the surface of the chair that you're sitting in, or the temperature of the air on your skin. Notice these sensations without judgment. Next, listen for three things you can hear. It might be the sound of your breathing, birds outside, or a clock ticking. Tune into the sounds around you, even the quiet ones. Next, take another deep breath and notice two things that you can smell. Even if you can't detect any strong smells, think of two scents that you enjoy, like a freshly baked loaf of bread or your favorite flour. If you like, take a moment to grab something nearby to smell. And lastly, notice one thing that you can taste. Maybe you just had a sip of coffee, gum, or water. If you don't taste anything, just think about your favorite flavor. Take another deep breath in and out and notice how you feel now. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed or disconnected, remember that you can use this exercise to come back to the present moment and remind your nervous system that you're not in danger at this very second. That things are okay and that we can calm down enough to think and take a moment to choose our next action. If you find yourself in a particularly heated political conversation, this 5 technique is a great one to practice to help you stay grounded and in control of your responses. However, we need the ability to pause for a moment first so that we can remember that we know this tool. That's where another skill called the stop skill can come into play. The stop skill is actually an acronym for stop. Take a step back. Observe your feelings and proceed mindfully. Some of our clients like to picture a big red stop sign in their mind when they start to notice that they are getting emotionally dysregulated or heated by what's happening in the moment. So really, anytime that we feel that emotional elevation rise up within us, that heat, we want to notice that big red stop sign come up in our mind, in our mind's eye, and we use the imagery of that stop sign. Okay. To remind us to take a moment, take a pause, take a breath and maybe give yourself a break where you go to the restroom or you step into another room and you use that 54321 technique to give you time to come down and find the clarity to decide whether to engage or disengage and to make that choice based on what's best for you in this moment rather than what others are maybe pushing you to engage in. We all have moments where it's best not to engage, and instead choose to protect our peace. But other times, it may be in our best interest, and even in the world's best interest, to engage and to use our voice. One of the hardest parts of this post election landscape is dealing with the relationships that feel strained or contentious. So many of us, our clients, and the friends and the family that we speak with are struggling with the question, Should I just cut ties with someone with opposite views? Or is it possible to maintain a good relationship while setting boundaries? And truly, there is no one size fits all answer to this dilemma. One of the key reasons why this is a difficult question is that this election is different from all before it. Even the 2016 election. This time around, people knew what they're voting for and who the candidates are as people. We know their values. including if a candidate's values are to perpetuate hate and discrimination, or if they value acceptance, diversity, and human rights for all. It's hard to maintain relationships with people who voted for a candidate who holds values that are personally, physically, and emotionally harmful to us. This is not a choice of simply separating the person from their political beliefs. Because this really isn't a difference in perspective on political party. It's a difference in perspective on human rights. And to help you reflect, process, and decide on how to engage in relationships during this difficult political climate, I recommend really reflecting on the 10 questions that I'll share with you next, either by yourself, via journaling, or even in session with your therapist. Number one. How significant are your political differences? And do they relate to fundamental values or policies central to your identity? Number two. Can you separate the person from their political beliefs? Or does this change how you see them? Number three, do their political views affect you personally, affect your loved ones, or the causes that you deeply care about? Number four, how do political conversations with this person make you feel? In other words, can you engage in civil discourse with this person without it turning disrespectful or abusive? Number five, are they willing to respect boundaries around political discussions? Or can you agree to just avoid certain topics and have that be respected? Number six, is the relationship otherwise meaningful? And if you choose to maintain the connection because of this other meaningful part of the relationship, can we hold those key boundaries? Do they respect it when you say something like, I really prefer not to talk about politics right now, or let's actually focus on what we have in common. Those phrases can really help steer conversations away from conflict, and if you have a meaningful relationship with a lot of history with someone, and they can honor those boundaries and respect when you draw that line, this may be a sign that there's something to work with here. And that that relationship can be maintained. Question number seven, outside of politics, does the relationship bring value to your life? Do you have shared memories, interests, or experiences? Number eight, are you trying to change each other's views or as mutual understanding possible? Number nine, can you tolerate the discomfort of disagreeing if it means preserving the relationship? And number ten, imagine how you will feel if you reduce contact or end the relationship. Does this bring relief or regret? I hope these questions give you an opportunity for deeper processing and help. guide you in making the decision that feels right to you. The truth is, now more than ever, we do still need connection, even in a world that feels divided. Surrounding yourself with positive community, of women and other allies especially, can be very healing to us. This isn't just about finding support or finding people that agree with us to surround ourselves with because we actually need that discourse with others who see the world differently to be fully open minded and well rounded individuals. But to maintain our mental health, it is important to find support in order to amplify each other's voices and create collective actions. Whether it's joining a woman's circle, attending a support group, or volunteering, connections like these remind us that we're not alone and that we can come together to try to enact action that moves us forward as a society. And don't underestimate the power of technology to maintain relationships or to form new ones. A quick text to check in on a friend can make a really big difference. And if you're able, especially consider reaching out to women that are in marginalized communities or trans women who may be feeling especially vulnerable. and fearful in the political climate that we are in right now. Since we're on the topic of coping and managing our mental health in a contentious political environment, I need to take a moment to talk about news consumption. Staying informed is critically important, but exposure to negative news can take a really significant toll on our mental health. Biologically, physically, we are just not designed to know about or cope with all of the bad things happening across the country, let alone across the whole world, all at once. So please do your best to find a balance that feels healthy and sustainable for you. Knowledge is power, but so is protecting your peace. Setting boundaries around your media consumption can look like limiting yourself to 10 minutes a day, curating your new sources carefully and balancing news consumption with uplifting activities that bring you joy, such as listening to music or doing a gratitude practice. You may also consider sandwiching your news intake between other joyful topics. So, start out by sitting down and watching some puppy videos or intentionally searching for good news at the start of your news intake session, and then turn your attention towards world news or news throughout the country, which is going to have some challenging things in it. And then sandwich it again with that new search of something positive and joyful. Remember, protecting your peace is an act of resistance. We don't need to be tuned into the news all the time. The patriarchy thrives when we're scared, overwhelmed, and exhausted. So the more that we can find balance, the better we're going to be able to take care of ourselves, those around us, and take action to move us all forward. Finally, Let's turn to talking about how we take grief and turn it into empowerment. No matter how hopeless we feel about big events happening in the world around us, we always retain control over something. Even if the only area that we have left to control is how we respond, that is something. So when things feel sad, overwhelming, and like there's nothing that you personally can do to make a Take a deep breath and intentionally think about what is within your power to control. You do have the freedom to choose what you do next. That can look like taking that deep breath and taking a break to engage in self care, or it can look like taking action and becoming an advocate for causes that you believe in. You can choose to follow, share, and support content created by other women as a way to amplify each other's voices. You can choose to support candidates who represent your values by donating to their campaigns, or even by running for office yourself. Even small actions like sharing a podcast or attending a local protest, can make a big difference in a world where managing your own mental health can be difficult. Knowing that you are doing something, no matter how small, will help you retain a sense of strength and resilience. Remember, the patriarchy thrives when we're exhausted, afraid, and divided. So let's band together, take care of ourselves, and find balance. Taking care of yourself and controlling what you can is a radical act of defiance that we can lean on today.