Episode 012- An Interview with Shelby Clement: Embracing Authenticity on Social Media & In LIFE!

Introducing Shelby Clement- wife, mother, entrepreneur, owner of Shelby Clement Marketing, public speaker, podcast host, and ultimate hype girl. She is a FORCE to be reckoned with and is carving out her legacy with a tenacity that is equal parts contagious and inspiring. 

During our conversation today, Shelby gets candid about tough lessons learned over the last year, the "power of the pause", setting boundaries, and the importance of authenticity (both on social media and in life).  

Forget about following the trends and people pleasing- Shelby is all about empowering those around her to help them build a brand (and a LIFE) they are proud of and all while embracing the uniqueness only they can bring. 

Whether you're looking to expand your brand or could simply use a pep talk from this hype-girl extraordinaire - this conversation is a MUST listen!

Thanks for tuning in!

-The Goodyears

Be sure to follow Shelby on Instagram at   https://www.instagram.com/itsshelbyclement/

Transcript

0:04

We are Brent and Lindsey, Goodyear, husband, and wife duo here to share our unfiltered thoughts on marriage, parenting, faith, family, and everything in between. We promised. I ask the hard questions and share perspective as we navigate life in all its unexpected. Curve ball, field glory. So here's to authenticity, here's to growth and here's to embracing the good years. So welcome to another episode of the good years. Um, I'm Lindsay, your host, and I'm here today with Ms. Shelby Claymont. Thank you so much for joining us, Shelby. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited. This is, this is awesome. I know. I'm thrilled to have you. So I really like, as I'm kind of brainstorming people to have on the podcast, one of the big things is just like, who, who am I interested in talking to? And that interest kind of stems from different things, whether that's, we share, you know, Commonalities and like seasons of life or I'm interested in and what they're doing or you know Maybe like a big event that they have but like with you I've just been kind of like not to sound super creepy via social media but like just like seeing you from the outside and like you just seem to have this like Energy and this life that just exudes from you and it's so interesting Contagious it seems to the people around you and that like it it literally like drew me to you and I think that that's one of the reasons why you're Literally killing it and what you're doing and rocking it is because you're just so authentically yourself And you've, I don't know if that's just something that is like naturally you or if you've grown into that, but it is, it is so beautiful to witness and I wanted to like provide you a platform for other people to witness that light and that energy too. So that's really one of the reasons why I wanted to have you on. Well, thank you. That was so nice. That was so kind for you to say, I really appreciate it. Um, I'm so excited to be here. I think that. We've known each other. Well, we've known each other virtually for a long time ago, I think we are doing like, I just love you and your energy too. So I think this is going to be a really great conversation for your audience as well. Oh, well, good. I'm glad. So for those of the listeners that don't know anything about you, why don't you tell us a little bit about who you are and what you do. Yeah, absolutely. Hey guys. I'm Shelby claim on. She said, um, I am a social media manager. I own a social media management agency. I left corporate in 2021. Yes. I think that's right. Yes. Um, I was in the oil and gas learning together. It all blends together. At this point, I was in the oil and gas industry for eight years prior to this, um, as their marketing director. And so I was kind of thrown into the job at 23 years old and it taught me a lot that I know today. I just knew there was more for me and I knew that I had a bigger purpose in life. So. Being patient at job interview after job interview, getting turned down, saying I was overqualified. They couldn't pay me what I was worth, like all those things. And I just would come home crying to John and say, you know, if this is God's plan of me being a mom and staying in corporate and working from eight to five, then that's what I'll do. Well, um, right before COVID, I went to California for a social media marketing conference. And now when I tell you, I was in the oil and gas, like marketing is not like their biggest support thing that they love. Like it's typically the first thing they, they cut. Um, so I really wish that I remember the moment that they told me, yes, that I could go to California and, um, I went and it is a world of social media managers. And I saw people speak on stage and it was just like a different world that I wasn't experienced to. And I came home and I was like, John, this is like the perfect thing. Social media managers is like, what is that? And I was like, okay, I'll explain. But then COVID happened. So like, God, so I was like, you know, this is what I think I want to do. Yeah. So I was newly pregnant. I had, uh, like a, I think it was 18 months at the time, uh, toddler at home too, with me, cause everybody got sent home to work from home. So I was like, you know what? I can't quit my job now. And, um, what I did is I took what I learned from California and started implementing and I was like, Oh my God, this works. And so I started getting side hustles, um, in February of 2021. And then by May of 21, I was able to leave. And. In the last three years, we've helped hundreds over hundreds of brands really increase their brand awareness by utilizing social media and really just going into strategy and doing all the things that you need to do to market your business with this free tool that you have access to now. Um, and so I've built a very successful agency. We have a marketing conference sets every year that I bring in. Great speakers from all around the world to come in and pour back into you guys that I've invested in to learn more. Um, I have a podcast and we're about to launch a membership. So it's just like, it's a whirlwind of things. So, I mean, girl, I was literally like writing down, cause I was preparing to talk to you, like kind of like doing your little, I mean, essentially like. Your checklist of like, okay, let's think about all the things that she doing. And I'm like, literally, when do you sleep? Because all of the things like it's like mom, wife, business owner, podcaster, speaker, content creator, influencer, it's just you, you manage all of those things so beautifully. I mean, how do you? How do you balance it all? Like that's really, I, and this is truly me wanting to know, like ask somebody that is currently trying to balance being a wife and a present mother and someone that's working and trying to do this on social media and podcasting. Like, how do you do it? Yeah. Well, I'll be very honest. If you would have interviewed me last year, it would have been a different answer, but this year I, um, well last year in 20, no, in October, I went to the hospital cause I thought I was having a heart attack. And so I just literally pushed myself to the ground and I was very stressed. And I was like, I can do all of this. I was running a business. I had employees, just like you said, I have two very small children. I have a husband. I was trying to be present, but in my mind, I thought I'm a social media manager, I can't put my phone down. Like I have to do all these things and I have to be present for my clients. And I just didn't have boundaries. I was answering people at 10 o'clock at night. I literally constantly had my phone in my face and You know, when I was making my goals for this year and like my, um, uh, what do you call that vision board? It was like seven figure agency. Like, I really want to hit it. Cause like our trajectory was like really well over the last three, uh, three years. And I said, you know what? I don't want that anymore. January is like a whole new leaf turned. And I just said, I don't know what's next. I don't know what to do. I have a huge question mark. God, I surrender. Can you please just tell me like, what is next for me? Is it burning the agency to the ground? Okay. I'll figure it out. I got to this point. We can do it again. Is it going a completely different route? Like, what do you want me to do? What am I supposed to do? What was I made for? And so I sat with that, Lindsay, for like, Three months. I was miserable. I was literally like prayers. Like I was just like, I need to know, well, Lint came around and I gave up social media for Lint. Now, before you say it, how'd you do that? Cause I'm a social media manager. I gave it up after 8 PM, um, during the week, literally it was, and if you. At first, some of you may eye roll if you're listening to this and some of you are like, how the heck did you do that? Cause that's like when my kids go to sleep and my husband kind of gives me time to like sit in the bath and I can like, just like unwind. Um, I just made it a priority and I started, uh, reading more because one time I was on a podcast and someone asked me like, what's my latest read? And I was like, embarrassed. Cause I was like, I don't read. Cause like I don't have one. Right. And so I started reading and I had quiet time. And like, that is when it hit me that The world keeps turning. My business was still thriving. I didn't need to be turned on all the time. And that's kind of like where it blossomed with the power of the pause that I talk about now and that the monster needs to sleep too, because social media now, do I think it's a great tool to use for your business and for your brand and building all those things? Absolutely. But it also needs to sleep as well. Meaning you need to have boundaries set and that you can still build a very successful business. By not consuming so much and being so on, on all the time. So to answer your question this year, it really opened my eyes to say, I don't have to be on all the time. I can be on when I want to be on, when I need to be on in the rest, my phone goes away. I have two phones now because when I went to the hospital, too many people had access to me where they just thought it was just an easy question for me to answer. And I just felt like I had to answer it. Well, now my other phone only maybe 15 people. Maybe right. I have it where I, that is the only one I have at night. And then that one also goes up. So it's just like little small things that I've had to adjust. So I will say this from the outside, it might look like I have all my stuff together, but from the inside, it's more of like, now I'm ready to fully share my story that it was been kind of a shit show for the last year. It's like a work in progress. Yeah, absolutely. And it's so funny. Cause like, as you're talking, like. So you and I sound like we're cut from the same cloth. Like I cannot tell you, like I'm, I'm a type A personality. Like I'm very internally motivated and driven. I have very high goals and I will literally, just like you, I will run myself into the ground to achieve those goals. And it, it really is truly, cause I had to do the same thing after I had My second child, when I had Marlo, like just physically the last part of my pregnancy, I was just literally physically exhausted because I was like nine months pregnant and couldn't do anything. And I had a two year old and you know, even the adjustment afterwards, like adjusting from one to two kids, it was like, literally God was like, okay, you're not going to slow down on your own. I'm going to physically make it impossible for you to run at the same speed we're doing before. And it is amazing how much Growth like when you do actually take a break and like take a step back how much becomes so much It just becomes so much clearer on yes What's important like where you want to actually go and then and prioritizing it and setting those boundaries And then when you can set those boundaries, then you can actually show up more present and more fully for the things that are important and then you actually make More progress in the long run, because you're not just like running on fumes. I mean, cause I struggled. I'm constantly like everyone. I mean, I'm a recovering perfectionist. Like I'm a, I'm a recovering, like, yes, girl, where it's like, I have a hard time just because I used to very in my, my own journey of like self awareness, I guess. Get a lot of value out of my performance and that's how I thought like I would like almost like earn Love and appreciation So I really do like as you were talking in my head. I'm like, yes girl. Oh my gosh Yeah, and it it's so crazy and it it's amazing to see the strides that you've made Not only personally, but professionally, when you did start to take care of yourself and your family and your soul, you know, and take time to prioritize all of those things. Like, what a beautiful example for the people. that you are coaching and mentoring in your business because probably everyone else on social media is just pushing this like hustle culture right where it's like you literally have to eat sleep breathe like give everything to your business in order to be successful and that is probably why we have like skyrocketing anxiety and issues with like, you know, divorce and comparison and all these things because people are so invested in, in this little screen instead of the things that actually matter. Yeah. It's so, I mean, what a, what a true testimony to like the people around you. I'm like, I'm so proud of you for like, Being so vulnerable with other people that they can see that. Cause you're right. From the outside looking in, it looks like it's like, Oh, she's, she's got it all figured out. Like, give me the secret sauce. Cause you've obviously got it in like a stepwise, beautifully formatted outline. So just print it out for me and let's go. But you're literally like, no, no, no. I'm like tripping my way forward. Basically. And figuring it out. I'll tell you this, like a lot of times what people have, that's the power of social media though, that you see truly just a highlight reel of what someone wants you to see. And, you know, lens, when I started, um, this year posting me crying, literally on the internet, crying, I literally would record, I was like, okay, this is something, and it's so weird, but I think it's just like the mindset that I live in because I am a social media manager and I know what works and what doesn't work on social media and I'm like, You know, if more people would talk about the hardships of running a business or putting themselves out there or all those things, you know, we would be healthier because we wouldn't be in comparison and posture syndrome, all these things. So I literally was crying, like literally bawling and I started recording and I was like, you know what? When I'm ready, I have this content to share what I was going through at that moment. And the response I got was. Oh my God, thank you. I needed to see this. And it wasn't because it was comments on it. It was behind the scenes, text messages, DMs, and that was God working. I truly believe because when you were running yourself to the ground, especially if it comes to social media and you're wondering, like, you're watching all these gurus and you're like, they're telling me to post this many times a day and I have to post this when you actually chill out and like. In the moment, you get clarity of what you're supposed to be giving to your community in the value sense. And so I felt that my community, I needed to get very vulnerable with them in order for them to feel loved and seen, and that this is a safe space for them to be. And when I did that, I was like, holy crap, this is something that they're so hungry for that they just want to be seen in the sense of business is hard. Building business online is hard. And it isn't as easy. And if somebody is willing to talk about it, then that's amazing. So I'm just, you know, it's when you get clarity and you pause and you ask, like, what am I supposed to do next? And just chill out and get silent. It's going to be beautifully written for you of like what you need to do next and how you are going to continue to thrive in your business or your brand or as a mom or as a wife, whatever that looks like. Right. And I can see that reflective in, I mean, the things you've been posting, like you have these like catchphrases that I like pick up on obviously one of them that you've been doing a lot is that your authenticity is your superpower. And I think that that is so beautiful. Yep. Um, because it really is like you try to whether it is in social media or motherhood or marriage or whatever. It's almost like people are trying so hard to fit this like square peg into this round hole and if it's not fitting then I'm messing up and there's something wrong with me and it's like no like maybe you're a square peg that's supposed to go on a square peg like maybe you just need to figure out like what your track is and and embrace that because That is what, honestly, we're all going through the same things like in, like with some degrees of varying variance in it, but we're all struggling with motherhood and balance and, you know, our own identity, like we're all going through that in different varying degrees, but people Aren't putting that on social media. So you're not seeing that. So you're thinking like, well, okay, well, well, Susie Q over there has it all figured out. And obviously like, I need to get my shit together because I haven't figured it out and put it on social media, but you're not seeing Susie Q running around with, you know, All just chaos behind the scenes, just like you are. And I think it's so beautiful to be able to do that. So I love that. That's one of your like, new little, like, I think mottos, catchphrases, but something that essentially you're like pushing for your audience, like, please embrace the authenticity that is you because it is, it is what makes you special and unique and nobody else can bring that to the table. Um, I want to say this one thing to this is when you really do lean into your authenticity, you break through the noise, you ruffle feathers. And that's where like, if the more people that listen to this and they're like, I'm sick of the perfection, I'm sick of, you know, everybody prim proper and perfect online. If you start just showing up as who you are. It is going to be so powerful in such a movement because people are so sick of perfection that they just want to see the human behind you as a mom, as a wife, as a business owner, as a brand, they don't care. That is how they're going to connect with you. So if you are a square and like, you're just weird and quirky, like I welcome it because you want to know why, when I, what I've realized too is people will unfollow you, but they were never going to buy from you anyway. But people, you will build such a tribe of human beings and community that does not matter what you sell, what you say, how you show up, how you are as a mom, they will not judge you. They will support you. There are there for you as like. To the end, because you have been able to, and willing to pull back that curtain for them to see. And so I think like with social media, it's ruining everybody's mental state in the sense of you're following these people that want, you want perfection and they don't, that doesn't exist even in their life, they They're just not someone that's willing to showcase the behind the scenes of the chaos. Yeah, I think that that's so true. I mean, like, honestly, like, so going with the comparison, like, what are some tips? I know you said that you have really been pushing authenticity and vulnerability. So like, what are your tips that you give people to do that? Cause that's hard for a lot of people. Like that's, that's a hard thing to do just personally within yourself, let alone on a worldwide platform with the. The potential of being judged. So you will be judged. It's fine. You will. Yeah. And so I mean, Like that is that's a good point. So like someone eventually you're going to have some little like troll in their room in their dark room that only has the courage to sit there behind a key keyboard and tear you to pieces because they're they're struggling with their own self worth, right? Like that's probably across the board. But what are some things that you tell your clients that you tell your staff that you tell your kids about? Encouraging that authenticity and that vulnerability. Cause I think that that's so important across the board, social media, or just like in life in general. Yeah. So there's multiple things. Number one is I had a conversation actually with my oldest the other day. And he was like, mommy, I went, they went to camp and some little kid was mean to him. And I was like, look. There are going to be mean people in the world. So this goes to all the adults that don't hear this either, that you tell your kids this, so listen to what you actually tell your children. And I say, there are going to be mean people in the world that has nothing to do with you. It is something that they're struggling with internally that they are unhappy with. So no matter what. You just still be a kind person. And so that forefront is number one. Number two is what I like to tell people is this. How big is the legacy that you want to build? Is it far greater than the fear that you have of what others will think of you? Because number one, they will always judge you no matter what you do, if you do it, or if you don't do it. And then another key component that I've done, especially starting in the beginning of the year is. Unfollow the people that trigger you. And what I mean by that is if you compare yourself, so say you're scrolling and even if it's my account and you're like, Oh, well, it looks like Shelby has it all together. I have to unfollow her. It's not because you don't love me. It's not because you don't love me. It's because that is not good for you. And what I've learned, especially coming into this new year, I've done a huge work on myself and like how I can totally protect my energy because I'm the type of person that's like, tell me everything that you want me to know. Tell me all your problems. I want to love on you. I want to support you. I want to give you everything. But it really was sucking so much out of me that like, I have to protect myself. And even if I love you and I have done follow you, that's okay. Because it's protecting me. I still can cheer for you in certain ways, but I don't need to see it. So I would say definitely like that, but then also get off of social media because you're consuming it way too much. What I mean by that is we literally spend hours. Consuming when we think it's 10 minutes, but if you literally look at the clock when you start scrolling and then by the time you're done, it's probably three hours later and the world is moving around you. Um, so like, I just think that it's a mental game where I know it's very weird to hear a social media manager. And I was literally going to say that. Yeah. A person told me this the other day, they look like Shelby's on line all the time. I said, no, I'm not. No, I'm not. I just have my systems and processes set up in a way that it looks like I'm online all the time, and it, and I'm not, and no one else handles my account. So there's ways that you can do these things. And still be successful and still show up. And if it still brings you joy, joy, that's really cool. And do that. But I would say 100 percent do the damn thing. Anyway, ask yourself, is my legacy bigger to, there are going to be trolls. There are going to be people that are just unhappy with their life and they're hiding behind a screen. They're going to be there, but I like to say you're welcome because you're helping my engagement anyway. So like, just, Oh, that's so good. Yeah, that's right. And then the third publicity is publicity regardless. It's bad, right? The third thing is just. Let them go, let hide their content, unfollow them, whatever that looks like for you, um, because life passes you by too quickly and you would be shocked how quickly your life can change in six months, a year, if you just, you know, chase your dreams, you get one life to live. So what are you doing to move the needle? Is that getting off social media completely to be present with your family? Is that starting that business that you've always thought about? Is it learning a, um. A new talent or something that you have and you want to learn more about it and get better at it and really just do that. Whatever that may, if you want to be a keynote speaker in front of 10, 000 people, then go figure out how to get on stage in front of one person or five people. You just have to do it because I also say this, especially if you have children, you cannot expect them to chase their dreams and do the damn thing if you are not. And if you're not being true to yourself and saying exactly who you are, you cannot tell them to be themselves. Cause you're not doing it. Yeah. You're not modeling it. That's a, that's so true. And like, honestly, like, I love that from you because. You did like you said in your intro like you used to work in corporate america You could have stayed in a very comfortable job climbing the ladder been doing that from you know Nine to five from now until you know You retired and you probably would have made you know a decent living But that you had bigger dreams for yourself and that took a huge leap of faith. It also took a huge amount of trust in yourself and like your own grit, but like, I know, and like you said, like it got hard. So like in those moments of people chasing their dreams and doing the big leaps and taking the scary, you know, steps forward when hard moments come, like for you, when those hard moments where you were like, what have I done? Holy shit. Like, did I make the wrong mistake? How did you talk yourself off the ledge? Like, how did you refocus and get back to like, okay, I'm going to take a deep breath and I'm going to keep moving forward and I'm going to do the damn thing. How did you talk yourself into that? First and foremost, I'm a huge advocate for ugly girl crying. Like literally let it out. Snot. If you've got to go stand in the shower, if you have to hide in the bathroom, do whatever you need to do. Um, that. And, and being okay with failure and having moments of weakness is okay. For the longest time, I was like, I'm failure and I'm going to, this isn't going to work out and, uh, people are going to be disappointed. And like, I'm so, uh, such a high achiever that if I don't meet certain goals, which are absolutely ridiculous, because if I told y'all some of them, y'all would be like, this is mind blowing. I truly think that I'm like the biggest failure ever. But, or if you don't meet them within like six months, right? Like I'm the person that has like, Oh, I have these high goals and I'm like kicking myself. And I'm like, why aren't you speaking on stages or have this like, you know, worldwide podcast within a year? Like you're such a, like, it's so ridiculous as, as a high achieving woman. The goals. And I think again, that goes back to social media, because we see these people that just like literally they go viral and their life changes in an instant. And we, we start to almost get brainwashed to think that that is the norm when it's not. I mean, it happens, but it's, it's the rarity of it. And I think that that is again, such a, a huge, the importance of, like you said, like limiting your social media and not scrolling, because then you, you, You're limiting essentially that brainwashing of like, okay, well, like I have to, I'm amounting to nothing because I'm not an Instagram famous. Yep. You know, trendy blogger mom within six months. Like I think that that's so important and I love the, the ugly girl crying. I mean like I'm a big advocate of that too, believe me, but it, it really helps like you sit there, you let it all out and then you're like, ah, okay, I can think I can feel better a little. I totally get that. I would say no, no, it's good. I actually liked it because, um, well, two things I'll come back to answer this question, but by reality is a thing that has really screwed up our generation completely and this cultural dynamic thing, because I've had clients that have gone viral. It's changed our lives. I've had my, some of my posts go viral and it's literally given me an influx. Right. And so you have to ask yourself, why are you chasing virality? Number one and two, can you handle if you did go viral? So for example, if you are a brick and mortar or you only offer, or if you're a brick and mortar, but you're a boutique and you offer online, can you fulfill thousands and hundreds of thousands of orders if you go viral? If you are a coaching service, can you coach X, Y, Z, if you go viral? Are you have the systems and processes in place to actually keep the quality of service that you offer if you do go viral and then also ask yourself, why the hell do you want to go viral? Is it a popularity contest? Are we still in high school? Like, where are we at with this? And so a lot of times we just have to ask ourselves these really hard questions of you are exactly where you're supposed to be. In this moment, things happen to you exactly how they're supposed to happen in this exact moment. And this is something that as a high personality that I am, I've had to swallow and understand that I'm not in control. And so, um, you just have to trust the process. And so when I hit my lowest of lows, I ugly girl cry. I basically tell everyone I'm going to burn it down by everyone. I truly mean like my very close knit group of friends that are either in the business world that understand it, that either know, like, okay, let me talk to her. How does she want me to talk to her right now? Should we burn it down? Should we get the matches or does she need me to motivate her? When you surround yourself with people like that, then you're like unstoppable. And then three, go the hell outside. Take whatever is that you failed at quote unquote. If you've actually failed at something, go outside. Or go watch some TV, or go spend time, or pour yourself a glass of wine, or go take a bath. Like, get away from the situation at hand. And really just like, rethink about like where you are and what happened and how can you get better? Because every failure leads to success in a sense of you can only get better from there. And so if you welcome failures in with like a big, warm bear hug, we don't love them, but like we need them sometimes to one humble us to, we need to get better at what we're doing. So not everything's going to be perfect. So I'm a huge advocate for ugly girl crying. Having a solid support system and then just getting away from that situation. So you can clearly think, because if you try to fix whatever you failed at in that moment, it's not going to work. Yeah. And it's so true. Cause like I've seen, I mean, I've seen quotes and I've read a few places. Like you can, failure is hard and quitting is hard. So you just have, I mean, like, but. And restarting is hard. You just have to pick which hard you want to go with, right? Like, are you going to take that failure and you're going to be like, okay, well, I quit and that's it. And that's, that's a sucky feeling. Or am I going to take that failure and be like, okay. dust myself off, have an ugly girl cry. I'm going to get it together, take some notes and figure out what didn't work. I now can at least like cross that off of like, okay, I know this didn't work and I know this didn't work. So I need to, you know, put that off the list and I'll move on to, you know, I'm probably at plan G or H at this point, but we're working through it. You know, like you're just, you kind of have to continue to go. And I love what you said about like, you're exactly where you're supposed to be because Brent and I, my husband, we talk all the time, like God is. Like ye who is faithful with little will be faithful with much. Like that's the scripture. Cause God, you know, basically like he's giving you what you're capable of handling at this moment. And even if, you know, me and God have it out sometimes where I'm like, listen, like my life, I have this plan for my life and you are not following my plan. And I'm getting real frustrated with you. And then. You know, inevitably, a lot of times I do this like little circular motion where I end up, you know, something goes wrong, something fails, it doesn't go according to my plan. I surrender, I give it up and me and God have a little chat and I'm like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna leave it to you. I'm going to give control back to you. And then inevitably, as I'm As I'm doing that, things kind of start trucking along where I'm like, okay, things are moving forward. And then it's almost like me and my like perfectionistic control freak kind of way. I'm almost like, all right, God, I got this now. Like you can take a backseat again, cause now I'm in control. And I evidently, I start taking over and trying to push things in my direction instead of taking, instead of listening to like guidance and where I'm supposed to be. And then, you know, this circular thing happens where like, okay, God reminds me like, okay, no, no, no, we're, you're getting off the path. Let's try again. You're going to fall face down. You're going to come back to me. And, you know, eventually I'm going to learn. I keep telling myself that. And, you know, I'm sure God's sitting up in heaven laughing at me, but I truly think that that's, I totally agree. Like we're, I'm probably like we're where we're at because we can't see the big picture like God knows and every you know he's not we're not seeing the big vision from like way you know 70 stories up we're seeing just what's in front of us right now so there may be a reason that we're just totally unaware as to why things aren't blowing up you know and and You know, taking off like we expect them to do. Um, but I love that. Now, another thing that you say is like one of your like mottos that I hear is telling people to like, okay, I need you to get in the room. Like that's a big thing. And I'm, I love that because I, I totally, I have used that in a lot of ways in my life in, you know, when I was running salt and light, when I was working on partnerships in the community, when I, when I got my mentor, like something that I say, That's kind of like a motto in our home is the answer is no, unless you ask. And so like, I always I'm like, I'm, I literally got my mentor. who I love and has been such a, uh, influential person in my life over the last year. I cold calling her, like she is like the, the wife of the pastor at our church and she mentors a few people, but like a very, very busy woman. And I didn't know her from, you know, Joe Blow, but I was like, Oh, okay. That's who I want. Like, that's who I want as a mentor. So literally one day I was like, well, I'm just going to, I'm going to cold call the church. Like she, the only where she can, where she can tell me is no, you know? And so literally called the church, asked to have a meeting with her. And you know, she tells me on the back end, like, she's like, I got this phone call and a message from this chick that I didn't know. And she's like, I almost, she's like, I told you, yes, just because I was so impressed by the fact that you just happened to call me and then ended up having coffee in her home. And you know, I guess the rest is history, but like it just like the same thing with. You know, partnerships that I've made in the community, like a lot of the things that I've done and the people that I've gotten connected with over the last few years of doing podcasting and hosting events and stuff in the Lafayette area, it's literally just been me asking. And a lot of times I get like five or six no's, but then I'm going to get a yes. And then that's the first, I mean, it was worth it and you're learning from it. And I think people are so afraid to, to hear the word no. And I, and I think that that. Is, is so, such a big part of, like, you would say, get in the room, like, You have to figure out a way to bust the door down and get in there. So what rooms have you gotten in and how have you gotten in them and how do you encourage other people to get in the room? What are steps to do that? Um, yes, just to piggyback off a little bit of what you said, though, a lot of people do associate no with failure and really what no is for everyone to remember. It's God telling you that there's an opportunity coming that you don't know about yet. So close the doors of the nose because that's just, you know, don't force it and allow the yeses to come through because they are way more powerful. Um, I will say this. So putting yourself, shooting your shots. So like you just said, you shot your shot. You didn't know what she was going to say. You didn't even know she'd say yes. You were just like, whatever. What is the worst she could say? That is literally what I tell everyone. What is the worst someone can say if you don't shoot your shot? So, obviously in 2021, I got in the room, wait no, 2020, I got in the room at Social Media Managing or Marketing Worlds, and I saw these people on stages. I saw Jasmine Starr, um, on a stage, and she was like a firecracker, and I was like, is she literally She's like, so much energy, like I follow her on social media, and that girl, it's like, she'll post different things, and I'm like, Oh, you got me fired up. Now you go run a marathon or something. Like she's just, I love it. Oh yeah. So she literally, as a, like a small town girl, y'all, this is me in 2020 in corporate, I was sitting in the stands and I said, If she can do it, I can do it. And it's because I put myself in that room that something got lit under my butt and I did a year later, exactly what God intended for me to do. And then a year after that, well, no, last year I got myself into, yes, last year I got myself into her mastermind and I paid a hefty investment. Now I'll tell you this. Every time you get yourself in the room, it is an investment and you do question everything. What am I going to get out of this? And whether or not you get something out of the actual program from who is putting it on, you're gonna get out of something the people that are in the room that also invested in themselves. Which, I put myself in that room, which, born Damn Good Marketing Live, with, and that made the speakers that came last year, or the people that I met in Jasmine's, actual mastermind. So that had DGML year one, solid August of 2023. I put myself in a room in Denver and I got the VIP ticket because if you're going to go to an event and you can afford to get the VIP ticket, get the VIP ticket. Cause that's where you're going to meet the speakers. And when you can meet the people that are on stage, that you are there to listen to and you can just learn a little bit and introduce yourself to them and ask them one question. It is worth all of it because they are ahead of the game in you and you want to learn from them. So I went to there. I was nervous as hell. The people that are listening to this, if you actually do follow me and you're about to be shocked, I'm about to say is I've learned in settings where I don't know anyone. I'm an introverted extrovert and I freak out and I get like, Oh my God, don't talk to me. Um, But I was there with my business coach had given me direct directions on what I needed to do when I got into the room, because she's like, we can't invest in this if you're not going to come away with something. Right. And I went with friends as well, where it was easy for me to just like stand in the corner and like, look at my phone and just be like, Oh, you know, whatever. I don't see anyone. I'm just gonna wait to listen. We were at the VIP party and I walked up to Trent Shelton, and those of you that don't know him, he is a highly famous, uh, ex NFL player now motivational speaker. And I stood in line after he spoke and I just told him like, I think you're awesome. Your, your message really spoke to me. Um, and he probably was one of the most genuine human beings that famous wise I've ever met in my entire life. There's a line of women waiting to speak to him, and he took the time, asked me what was going on. Mm-Hmm. told him about DGML. He was like, Oh, I'm from Louisiana. Like, whatever. We kind of like took a picture and left. Well, not even 20 minutes later, he was just walking around. He was done with all his like meet and greets. And my friend like literally goes, go ask him to be on your podcast. And I was like, he would never be on my podcast. It's so small, like whatever. And so. I truly don't know what happened in this moment, but she pushed me. And at this point we're looking at each other. What a good friend. And I was like, literally, this is exactly what I said. Um, so I know you're in the season of No. And like, I know it's like a really small podcast. And I know you probably will say no, but I just had to shoot my shot on this. And I did it and I'm like, what? Stop talking. And I was like, but were you doing my podcast? And so he said, yes. He said, literally email this lady, his assistant or whatever. So I emailed her. I freaked out. Like it was just so good. We've developed well, then he started following me and I was like, Oh my God, how, when I'm kidding, I didn't say that, but it was just like putting yourself in the room and now he's speaking at DGML this year, because we have such a relationship where I put myself in the room, I met him and then he's speaking. And then Keisha's mastermind, I just did with her and I shot my shot with her. And I said, would you speak at my event? And she said, yes. So the thing with it is. Yes, you can meet these high level people that can teach you what the next step is. And the people that I met in those rooms now are some of my closest and dearest friends that get where my mindset is, because we're in business. We're building online businesses, whether that's coaching, accounting, business coaching, social media management, website design, SEO, like whatever that looks like. In a sense, there's a financial advisor in there. Like, there's a group of us that we know we put ourselves in these rooms because we know that there are like minded individuals. And to do work in this space. You have to get uncomfortable and in order to be successful and hit that next level of success, you also have to be uncomfortable. So by putting yourselves in these rooms, it's very powerful. I like to say this, if you get nothing out of a conference or Um, a mastermind or anything, you will get the networking, the collaboration and the connections that you need from the people that are sitting there with you, because they've invested just like you and they are like minded just like you and whatever that looks like, whether that's, you know, a mom mastermind, a mastermind that you want to join, whether it's a corporate mastermind or a conference you're going to, whether it's a marketing conference that you're going to, like. You have to do the research of what rooms make sense for you and what ROI actually looks like for you. It might not be monetary yet, but it can be, or it could just be an ROI of, I need these connections in order to better my community and my brand to give back. So like there's so many factors, but. Especially after COVID people are craving human connection and interaction and not across the screen. They want to touch you, hug you, love on you, support you, understand how they can get back to you. And you can get back to them and really connect and bond with them. So the power of being in a room I'm very passionate about, cause it has truly changed my life because I started putting myself in a room in 2021 and then I didn't put myself in a room again until 2023 because I was so scared of the investment. But from seeing being in Jasmine's mastermind to multiple conferences to just finish a mastermind recently in a year, what has grown has been absolutely mind blowing because those people can help you get to the next level because they've done it. Right. And that's so true because like Brent and I in our relationship and in our marriage, I mean just in general over the last year. Yeah. We have, we say like, okay, we're like leveling up our relationships and leveling up our friendships because literally like if we are, I say like not to, this is going to sound really cocky, but like if we're the wisest people in the room, like if we're the pre the people that like people are coming to and it's like, Hey, how would you do this? Like, that's, that's great for the ego. Like that makes me feel super good, but I'm not gaining anything from that. Like, So we have been actively like saying yes to situations to try to put ourselves in the room with people that are going to force us to level up. And that, that is a hard jump because it does, it really does work on your ego. It does. Cause if you walk in the room and everyone else is, you know, 10 steps ahead of you, it makes you start to, again, that comparison, like, oh man, like, I don't deserve to be here, but if you have the courage to just say, like, those people were exactly where you were probably a few years ago, and they have learned, and they have, and that's, that's, you need to be like a sponge in those situations, because that, I mean, like, and, and that, because the majority of people And I do think we've lost this with social media because you see everything is so even with like, you know, on the news or social media, you see so much hate and so much like people attacking each other and just all this negativity, but like genuinely people want to help people like 90%, like 99 percent of the time, if you go up and you're kind to somebody and you ask them like, man, exactly like you did, Hey, you inspire me. I want to learn from you. You know, And I'm going to want to do it in a time that it and I want to do it in a way that is not going to waste your time or my time like I want to do it in a way where I can just gleam as much from you as possible. Like please help me with that most people if they're capable are going to say yes and then if they say no then it then like you said it's it's a closed door and it's nothing personal against you it's just that they're honoring, you know, The sake, the sacred that they have with their time. So I do think that that is so important, even if it is scary, like doing those hard things, leveling up, you know, getting into the room by whatever means possible, a lot of times with investment. And I think that moms in general, I'm sure men are the same way, but I do find that like, we are like constantly. Putting everyone else ahead of us to the detriment of ourselves. Like I, and I struggle with this. Like I'm constantly the lowest on the totem pole and I struggle with like, no, no, I'm going to take time to invest into me. And that's a hard thing. Cause I feel like society a lot of times almost like celebrates and like crazes women and moms. being these superheroes that put everyone else in front of them and do all of these things and, and, but it, it really, it really is not a good thing. Like it's, it's not healthy to do that. I mean, and so I think that it is so important to take the time to invest in yourself, even if that looks like, Taking time away from your children, prioritizing exercise, prioritizing date night. Like those things are so important so that then you can, like I said before, truly like put back in a whole person back into your, to your family and into the things that are important to you in life. And I think that that is so, so important. So I love what you said. I love those moments. Cause I, my next question was like, what was your pinch me? Holy shit. I did the damn thing moment. And it sounds like, I mean, Correct me if I'm wrong, but you've had several of those over the last year where you're like, oh my gosh, I literally am doing it. Do you have anything else coming that are that are, that's not like a surprise where you're like, that's in the works where you're just like, holy shit, I can't believe this is happening. I will say the most recent one. And we don't know if we get it yet. Like we don't know, but I'm just proud of myself that I did it. Um, is I entered to win to speak on the powerhouse women's stage in front of like 400 plus humans. And so I really just put myself out there on camera and I was like, this is my powerhouse moment. Um, I did see that. And so it's kind of like we had to get their attention. And once we're on the radar, they pick and whatever. I think today was like the last day you could enter. I don't know. Um, when do you find out just so I can like follow along and see if you get it. Dude, if I get it, I will cry. Honestly, thinking about it, it stresses me out in a way, in a good way. Like it's just like, this is like life. I get to do it. And I get to do things like this because I'm willing to take a chance and get uncomfortable. So like, to me, it's like, I did it. I was very nervous and I was like, who am I to get on the stage? Like, right. And like, who am I to have a powerhouse? Right. So like you're supposed to have, so what we're trained really to know is like, our story should be soppy and sad and I should, blah, blah, blah, blah, but like everyone has a true story. And so when I actually cultivated my powerhouse story, I was very proud of it. And you know, I, they did reach out and they did say, thank you for submitting. And I said, you know, I'm letting going, letting God at this point, like, if you feel like my story's a powerful enough to get on that stage, then I'm Then so be it. And I think that if I get it, I will be like, it's like, it could be life changing at that. Oh, for sure. Oh my gosh, exposed to so many people. So I would say like, that's a pinch me moment. But just getting in rooms, honestly, and like, not just to say that, but like the connections I've truly made are like, I get to make the decisions of putting myself in that room. So when I was in corporate and had to travel, I didn't really get to make that choice. So I had to be away from my family where now is I'm making that choice to teach my boys what it looks like to be a strong, powerful person and woman of what do I want? And I'm chasing my dreams. I'm doing everything I can to leave the legacy to them. So I would say. Honestly, overall, the pinch me moment as cliche as it sounds is it's probably the life that we live now. And it's, I'm proud of it because even though last year was like lowest of lows and this year, basic, like last year almost killed me. And this year was like very, very low in the beginning. But now it's like, I finally feel like. I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. I'm going to tell the story that allow whoever allows me to tell it as a social media manager, that it's okay to pause, um, as, as much as I can. And I think that I'm setting a good example and that my story needs to be heard. So as of right now, I keep saying this, there's not one famous person that'll probably shock me at this point. It's I'm proud of myself for what I've done and, and the legacy I'm building and the brand I've built. Hmm, you should be. You really are. I mean, like, literally, like, and I've heard you say this before, like, legacy, and it sounds like the legacy that you're leaving for your children. I mean, that is your why. Like, that, the legacy, not only is for your children, but like, to be proud of yourself. Like, that's saying something. Like, the legacy that where you can look back in 50 years from now and be like, Oh my gosh, I did the damn thing. Like, I literally got in the room. I can be proud of myself. Like, look at the community I built. And honestly, like, Shelby, even if it stops now, like even if for whatever reason, Everything just stops like you and I, I'm saying this like knowing you, you know, as much as I know you, but you, you can look back and be proud of that. Like though you've already left a legacy for your kids. If at the very least to show them that like the importance of trusting in yourself, of picking yourself up whenever you do fall, when things get hard to keep going, like those are things that like, You're literally like walking the walk as well as talking the talk and you're demonstrating that for your kids and and you're leaving things that are like actually like what a cool thing that you're leaving things like a podcast and like these these you're getting on stages and speaking and like your boys when you're like 80 and like hunched over with your little cane and your walker and just kind of hobbling around. I mean, your boys will be able to look at that and look at the podcast that you've done and look back and be like, look at how bad ass my mama was. Like, that is such a cool thing for you to be able to leave for your kids. So I'm like, you need to be so proud of yourself and how far you've come. Again, like, just seeing you and the energy and the light and the drive that you have, like, I have no doubt that even if there's a no, even if you have 50 no's, like, you're gonna keep moving forward. And that is such a rare, beautiful thing and such an inspirational thing for people around you, like that people want to soak up your light and they want to be a sponge for you. And that's such a great, um, Like you've built that and so that's so huge, but so if you could go back. This is like my last question Yeah, if you could go back and give yourself a pep talk when you're about to start this journey Knowing what you know now. What would you say? I Would say it's gonna be hard as hell. It's gonna be hard as hell you Are going to cry a lot. You are going to fail a lot You are going to succeed a lot. You're going to change lives and you're going to do a great job. You just have to stick with it. Um, because there were times I didn't know if I could keep going. And there were times that felt so hard that I just was like, is this worth it? And there was one time this year, I said, I think. That McDonald's worker looks happier than me. And like literally all jokes aside, it was genuine in that moment because building a business is not easy. Building a brand is not easy. And when your life is highlighted on social media, it actually makes it even harder and the mental game. So I would tell her that it's all going to be okay. And it gets to be easy. Um, if you allow it, but with hard work and dedication, you get to both the life that you want, um, and that people will have opinions, but you can't let that dictate you because in the beginning I danced on the internet a lot. Like I did all those trends and stuff. And like, people were like, what do you do? And leaving corporate to go dance on the internet. And I let that bother me and I let that get to me. And my husband was like, But they don't see your bank account. And I was like, well, that's accurate. But like, and that's not to say like me being like cocky or anything, but that's the truth because we let the thoughts of other people stop us from chasing the dreams and the purpose that we're supposed to live in. So I would tell her you're going to do the damn thing. You just have to lace up them boots and do it. I love it. That's so good. So this has been lovely. I really have enjoyed this conversation. And it really, I've learned a lot from it. I've learned, I've enjoyed getting to know you, you know, even more. Um, so for people that, you know, want to get in contact with you and want to follow you, can you leave your Instagram handle? Yes. Um, it's at, it's Shelby Claymall, uh, Claymall spelled C L E M A N T. And then everything else is linked in there. But truly, if you've listened to this, just let me know that if you liked it. I am an open book. Please just hop into my DMS. Like I love to have conversations with everyone. Um, I want to know what you're chasing and what dreams you're going for so I can cheer you on. Um, but yeah, I'll always be your hype girl. So jump in there and we can chat. Wonderful. All right, you guys. So that's it. We want to thank, um, Shelby for joining us today. Make sure you follow, um, the good years. We're on Instagram at the good underscore years, and then also give us a follow on, um, Spotify and Apple podcasts with the good years podcast. Thanks so much for joining. Bye y'all.