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Lead it Like Lasso: A Ted Lasso Rewatch Podcast
Marnie Stockman and Nick Coniglio, authors of the book Lead it Like Lasso, dig into each episode of Ted Lasso with a lens of leadership. Each podcast starts with a fun quick-clip summary of the episode. Marnie and Nick tie together the leadership principles from Ted Lasso, their own business successes, thought leaders and everyday advice to help individuals level up as they lead themselves (and others). This is a great podcast for TedHeads! There are many other Ted Lasso podcasts out there - this is the "same but different."
Lead it Like Lasso: A Ted Lasso Rewatch Podcast
Leadership Lessons from Chelsea | S3 Ep2
🎙️ New Episode! Season 3, Episode 2 of Lead It Like Lasso is here — and we’re headed to Chelsea (whether Roy wants to or not).
In “I Don’t Want to Go to Chelsea,” Marnie and Nick dig into:
🗣️ Communication breakdowns and how not to deliver big news
🤝 Ted’s “squash the beef” moment with Roy — and lessons on kindness without weakness
🧠The genius of Isaac’s body language read
👩‍💼 Keeley’s culture clash at KJPR (and snow globe diplomacy)
⚽️ Jamie’s evolution — from diva to team-first leader
It’s a clinic in feedback, ego, and building real trust. And yes, Zava makes his dramatic entrance.
Come for the leadership. Stay for the snow globes. ✨
#TedLasso #LeadItLikeLasso #LeadershipLessons #Podcast #TedLassoRewatch
Hi everyone, I'm Nick Negleo.
Speaker 2:And I'm Marnie Stockman, and this is the Lead it Like Lasso podcast, a Ted Lasso rewatch podcast. We are the authors of Lead it Like Lasso, a leadership book for life, your life.
Speaker 1:And this podcast is an extension of many of the elements outlined in our book. We invite you to join us as we take a deep dive into each episode and explore the leadership principles that they play out in the series. And for today's episode, we're diving into season three, episode two. I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea. So, marnie, as we talked about last time, there's some long episodes in season three with lots of content, needy episodes, yeah. Yeah, so let's review some of the key things that were going on in this episode. Sound good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'll start, go ahead.
Speaker 1:All right. Yeah, absolutely Go ahead, all right. First we learned that Trent, now the independent author, he's commissioned or he's in there writing a book about AFC Richmond. And not only that, but we get kind of a backstory between the relationship in the past between him and Roy Kent.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so that, of course, is one one of my favorites, as they are two of my favorite characters period. Also Zava this is the first we hear of a Zava Felt like I should throw that in in case folks forgot the reaction and Rebecca's take on how she handles that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that's interesting. And then we've got the Keeley angle, so we're continuing to see how KJPR is going and we find out real quick that she's struggling a little bit with culture.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and sad news for the whole internet that Roy and Keeley broke up and how everyone is dealing with that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then then we have Roy. Speaking of Roy from earlier, he goes back to Chelsea, where he used to play, and used to star as a footballer, hence the episode and this really triggers some, some self-reflection that that we get some insights on as we end this episode. So so where do you want to start with this episode when we start to pull out the leadership, uh angles from from what? What came across?
Speaker 2:Right, so I'm literally looking at four and a half pages of notes, uh, from this so we'll keep it.
Speaker 2:We'll keep it short. So let's start with communication style. You and I talk about the importance of telling folks how to communicate with you, giving a communication guide right, if somebody has just started working with you so they understand your style of communication. And in this episode they showed that by lots of comments about different age groups. Case in point step number one Jamie goes to console Roy about, you know, breaking up with Keely, and Roy's like what are you doing? And what's that face? He's like that's, it's empathy man like I forgot, old man, you know. And then jamie goes to give him a hug I forgot. Like you all are flinchy because of the war, right? So all this old man stuff. And then, um, and then you find out, of course will is in there, right, the kit man listening. And uh, and again you get that different generations, and they're not even different generations. What in the real world are they like? 10 years apart Maybe, but they are showing you that different age groups, everybody has different communication style.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So when you said communication, absolutely Something I thought about as I was watching this and it reminded me they heard of Zava, so they might be interested in signing Zava. Yeah, and, and that was a surprise to everybody. And then of course they let him know that they're really talking about Roy and Kelly and he almost faints. And then Roy walks in and they disclose that Trent's actually, you know, going to write a book about the team. I just, you know, we talk about how how, sometimes, when communication not done well, really can cause issues.
Speaker 2:Yeah, amplifies the problem or creates new ones new ones they gave us.
Speaker 1:They gave us the, the perfect um counter example of what not to do and, in terms of uh uh, sharing information that probably needs to be delivered with a, with a very well-worded message, message of some sort.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely, I mean so. I thought the same thing. When Ted came out and they were all upset about something, he immediately jumped to like, oh, is this about us getting Zalva? That is not how. Like, even if it was, that's not how you message. That it's interesting. You know how when you hear a new word or you run across something you haven't heard in a long time, and then suddenly you see it lots of other places this is coming up for me in the notion of People say to show up as your authentic self, but the reality of it is is you need to show up as your best authentic self. In aabu was coming, that's not his best take on that. It's not how he would have done it. So, yes, you're right, that was the perfect counterexample of what not to do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and a reminder of a chat we had with Lorraine Lee and author of Unforgettable Presence. But the best authentic version of yourself, body language matters and if you don't remember that, you can just you can ping your friend Isaac McAdoo, who is an excellent master.
Speaker 1:Yeah, kinesis at the science of reading body language. But you know, we've we've often talked about just the importance of first impressions and it's critical, right that you put off the right body language and Isaac was able to see in two seconds. Of course it's a TV show, but there was something wrong with Roy and Keely just by looking at the body language.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that was brilliant. Yeah, so I hadn't even connected that with the notion of communication, but really all around. And people often ask us what is the most important element of leadership, and we often say trust, because that leads to communication and with communication going badly, everything can break down, and I think this really is a good episode that represents that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, no doubt All right, so is it my turn.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. What do you want to talk about?
Speaker 1:Well, I want to talk about something we have brought up once or twice before, which is don't take my kindness for weakness.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, you know that's a statement that I have had to use out loud to grownups before.
Speaker 1:So yeah, and you know, we often talk about about Ted and we, we, we, we speak to the fact that, all right, he is kind, he is empathetic, but he also knows when to draw the line and be stern with his message.
Speaker 1:Yeah absolutely, and I you know we say that all the time and it's not so easy to bring up the specific examples of when he does that. And this episode I thought was perfect how he dealt with Roy, really disrupting an entire locker room, the entire team, by not allowing them to say anything at all To Trent, and he had a great line. You know he wanted to squash the beef and start I'm getting this wrong, but something around starting eating off the vegan menu.
Speaker 2:He said eat vegan, yeah, and I thought that was like eat your veggies, do what's right for you. But I didn't realize it was the squash, the beef, which is funny.
Speaker 1:That's good, squash the beef, but you know, do you have any? I mean you. I think, between the two of us, I think it's pretty obvious, you're kinder than I am, without a doubt.
Speaker 2:That's not true.
Speaker 1:What words of motivation and encouragement do you have to those people? Who really struggle to be that stern person in terms of when they need to be, yeah.
Speaker 2:Well, goodness knows, we talk a ton about understanding who you are and knowing your core values being critically important and I think when you know that you can set boundaries where you then say like nope, and that's that, is crossing the line. I mean, you and I both know we have a situation where somebody called and was yelling at me because I typically do respond kindly Right, and it was somebody we worked with and my typical response to listen and respond was not working and I actually yelled back, to which my daughter was like texting her dad. Dad, I don't know what your mom's talking to, but this has gone ugly and I wouldn't want to be the person on the other end. So don't like to have to do it often, but you do have to know where your boundaries are so that you draw the line in the sand for other folks. But one part that I thought was really important in the way Ted had that conversation with Roy and remember I was an educator, I was an administrator, so I often had to do classroom observations of other teachers and many times I would see something I didn't agree with and I had to call them out on it because, goodness knows, you know, instruction is not going to get better with proper feedback.
Speaker 2:So I think learning how to give proper feedback is a good way to still be kind, because, as Brene Brown would say, clear is kind, and one of the models that I've read a good bit about is it's called SBI, which is situation, behavior, impact. So here's the situation. Right, like Roy, the locker room is a hot mess. Behavior, because your ego is in the way right and it's causing tensions to mount. Impact we're going to lose a lot more than just this game to chelsea. Right, and then tied it together with the action that we need to have happen.
Speaker 2:But then what else did he do? This was about this situation, not about roy as a human, and he said hallmark movies are, like you know, they're terrible and great at the same time. So it was a still and I love you, roy. But this situation which your communication has impacted needs to change, and I think when I think of don't take my kindness for weakness, I don't like it when I have to sort of get on my high horse and deal with it. I would like to get better about couching it as situation, behavior and impact to be able to have that conversation Honestly. How about you, you know, you've, you've watched me in more of those situations than I've thought about myself or any situations that you remember from like your, really, you know escalation in terms of leadership.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, I think, I think it.
Speaker 1:It it has always been something especially younger in my career, earlier in my career, that I struggled with because, as we know, I'm a I'm a people pleaser.
Speaker 1:It wasn't until I realized and and I probably had a different phrase for it until Brene Brown was, as you mentioned, clear as kind.
Speaker 1:But you come to the realization and you know the whole approach, that, okay, I am consistently clear with expectations, expectations. I'm also consistently clear with an openness to listen and hear somebody else's perspective on things, I think, which is important. So when you have to be clear and to the point and direct, people will realize, okay, in other situations they they questioned me, they saw where I was coming from, but there comes a point where something so obvious it had, like this with with roy and trent that ted just had to do something about it. And I think throughout the series they have done a great job portraying ted as someone who is very much open to somebody else's perspective, yeah, and building the trust with people that when he does deliver a stern message like you need to squash this beef, roy, it is accepted wholeheartedly and action is taken so much better than the compliment sandwich that some people use in terms of uh so much better feedback.
Speaker 2:Right, and and when I first came to the company that you worked for, you had already built the trust and that relationship with people. So when you said, like everybody listen, that was I know those were probably one of the first, one of the first things I said about you to you is like, oh, when you talk, people listen because you had built that trust and we're wide open. Um and so, yeah, I think that's very true.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it does take a while. I think that is one of the issues of any leader that is new to a position. It's really hard to do that right out of the gate because in essence you're relying on title only and we know, and we've talked about, that never works. You have to set some sort of track record and build that level of trust to get to that point.
Speaker 2:Which actually leads to one of the other topics, which is how do you get to know folks? And what did Keely want to do, maybe have a picnic, right? Well, she wanted to go get some fire. Well, I can never say the word right, nazcu, you know, and have some big wild shaman event. And Ted said, well, I can never say the word right, I'm not school, you know, and have some big wild shaman event. And Ted said, well, I was thinking escape room, you do, you. But having that time outside of the official work to build that relationship and trust is important.
Speaker 1:Oh, I mean clearly, clearly and again. They presented that so well. You can tell just that office environment was very sterile. Nobody was talking to each other, Nobody was having fun, the interaction between the coworkers was almost non-existent and obviously the interaction between Barbara and Keely was strained at best All business versus all fun. There was some sort of compromise that needs to happen here and to kind of bring it back. Don't take my kindness for weakness. You know Ted demonstrated that really well, but Keely did as well. Barbara really was rude.
Speaker 2:Inappropriate with Shandy yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, inappropriate, and Keely dealt with it right away by being direct and being clear that that, in essence, was not acceptable. But but, taking the advice from from Ted earlier, she noticed the snow globes and she started to build that connection. It was not outside of work, but it wasn't work related. And how important is that in developing a network of people and a culture that is one that could potentially lead to thriving.
Speaker 2:And that was the brilliant baby step, because it was clear Barbara wasn't gonna go on a picnic with Keely, so to connect in her space. The other part that was brilliant for both Ted and Keely well done, writers again is Ted took Roy in another room, roy took Trent in another room, keely went in another room, roy took Trent in another room, healy went in another room. You don't have those conversations in the crowd, in the public. You have critical conversations, critical feedback, one-on-one, all of the time, even if you need to give it a beat and change rooms.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and let's segue. You know, you know the types of people that have those conversations in public. It's people with egos. Yeah Well, egos, you know they want, they want other people to know that, that they are the boss or they are the best. So my weak attempt at a segue is Zava.
Speaker 2:Oh, Zava, and the ego of Zava yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:So I got to thinking because I'm guessing this maybe doesn't happen as much in education, but in every technology and development group I've always been part of greatest challenges I've ever had in in teams that I've worked on, because ego was the opposite of the culture that I always wanted to build. So I'm curious did you run into that much in education or your experience in other?
Speaker 2:industries that you've worked in.
Speaker 2:Typically in teaching first, teachers have that emotional intelligence right that it doesn't play out that way. I have run into an administrator or two where it was a challenge, because of the ego for sure. But I more saw that diva attitude more amongst in the software space when somebody felt like they were the star player and that can create a toxic culture because I mean it's just dangerous to a team if you don't corral that in and we've definitely talked about that from a personnel perspective, you have a really good performer but they're killing the team and frankly, I feel like I just listened to Gary Vee do a talk about. You've got to fire that person because culture is everything and if you let that ego run the team it's going to be harmful. And I think that's what Jamie's hinting at.
Speaker 2:At the end of the show where they said they got Ziva and he said the fans aren's going to be harmful. And I think that's what jamie's hinting at. At the end of the show where they said they got zeven, he said the fans aren't going to like that. Now may's bars go on bananas, um, because they just see the striker. But I think jamie sees like you know, we have these problems with me he recognizes the parts of him that were what you know he sees in Zava. So yeah, that's kind of my take on that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I agree and let's give Jamie a nod If we were to give out MVPs in terms of personal development for each episode, Jamie took a huge step forward for each episode.
Speaker 1:Jamie took a huge step forward, Clearly with his empathetic reaction to Roy and Keely, number one, but number two, just exactly like you said, he is the one who sees, rightly so, exactly as you said, because he was once that person. But the fact that the ego of Zava is going to kill, presumably, the team dynamics, that culture, yeah, um, that has been, uh, built up significantly since the middle of season two. You can, you can tell they're in a great spot in terms of locker room chemistry at this point. Yeah, and Jamie's the one, not Ted, not beard, not. You can tell they're in a great spot in terms of locker room chemistry at this point and Jamie's the one, not Ted, not Beard, not anybody else.
Speaker 2:Jamie is the one who recognizes that there's a risk here in terms of team dynamics. So it's funny you say that the locker room dynamics because at halftime, right after the Roy Trent bit and they want Jamie's idea on what they need to do. Jamie starts the idea hey, when we're running past the middle, sam picks up flawlessly from there and says, yeah, when we get the ball, we need to keep dribbling, and Isaac finishes it. So they are a cohesive unit and if somebody gets in the middle of that, that will be trouble.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it feels like that's about to happen.
Speaker 2:Yes, it does. You know what? My last comment that I've written down is Jamie is the only one who has done all the work for himself, and he's got now the right kind of confidence you and I talk a lot about. You have to know the authentic version of you to be confident, and that's how you show up as your true self, and we can see James done the work.
Speaker 1:Yeah, is that the last, last we have anything else?
Speaker 2:Last, last, yeah All right.
Speaker 1:Well then, that is our whistle whistle. So game's over.
Speaker 2:but the leadership lessons keep on playing, is our whistle whistle, so game's over, but the leadership lessons keep on playing. Yeah, they do. So if you like this, please be sure to subscribe. Follow us everywhere, like Roy, here, there and everywhere. On social, we're at Lead it, like Lasso, and, of course, you can find us at leaditlikelassocom, and we'd love for you to check out our snarky sidekick of a newsletter workinprogmessai, absolutely.
Speaker 1:So until next time, stay curious, stay kind and keep leading it like Blasso. Thanks everybody.
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