Leadership Lessons from Chelsea | S3 Ep2

🎙️ New Episode! Season 3, Episode 2 of Lead It Like Lasso is here — and we’re headed to Chelsea (whether Roy wants to or not).

In “I Don’t Want to Go to Chelsea,” Marnie and Nick dig into:

🗣️ Communication breakdowns and how not to deliver big news

🤝 Ted’s “squash the beef” moment with Roy — and lessons on kindness without weakness

🧠 The genius of Isaac’s body language read

👩‍💼 Keeley’s culture clash at KJPR (and snow globe diplomacy)

⚽️ Jamie’s evolution — from diva to team-first leader

It’s a clinic in feedback, ego, and building real trust. And yes, Zava makes his dramatic entrance.

Come for the leadership. Stay for the snow globes. ✨

#TedLasso #LeadItLikeLasso #LeadershipLessons #Podcast #TedLassoRewatch

Transcript

Episode Introduction and Recap

Speaker 1 0:13

Hi everyone , I'm Nick Negleo .

Speaker 2 0:15

And I'm Marnie Stockman , and this is the Lead it Like Lasso podcast , a Ted Lasso rewatch podcast . We are the authors of Lead it Like Lasso , a leadership book for life , your life .

Speaker 1 0:27

And this podcast is an extension of many of the elements outlined in our book . We invite you to join us as we take a deep dive into each episode and explore the leadership principles that they play out in the series . And for today's episode , we're diving into season three , episode two . I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea . So , marnie , as we talked about last time , there's some long episodes in season three with lots of content , needy episodes , yeah . Yeah , so let's review some of the key things that were going on in this episode . Sound good .

Speaker 2 1:00

Yeah , I'll start , go ahead .

Speaker 1 1:03

All right . Yeah , absolutely Go ahead , all right . First we learned that Trent , now the independent author , he's commissioned or he's in there writing a book about AFC Richmond . And not only that , but we get kind of a backstory between the relationship in the past between him and Roy Kent .

Speaker 2 1:21

Yeah , so that , of course , is one one of my favorites , as they are two of my favorite characters period . Also Zava this is the first we hear of a Zava Felt like I should throw that in in case folks forgot the reaction and Rebecca's take on how she handles that .

Speaker 1 1:40

Yeah , yeah , that's interesting . And then we've got the Keeley angle , so we're continuing to see how KJPR is going and we find out real quick that she's struggling a little bit with culture .

Speaker 2 1:55

Yeah , and sad news for the whole internet that Roy and Keeley broke up and how everyone is dealing with that .

Speaker 1 2:05

Yeah , and then then we have Roy . Speaking of Roy from earlier , he goes back to Chelsea , where he used to play , and used to star as a footballer , hence the episode and this really triggers some , some self-reflection that that we get some insights on as we end this episode . So so where do you want to start with this episode when we start to pull out the leadership , uh angles from from what ? What came across ?

Speaker 2 2:35

Right , so I'm literally looking at four and a half pages of notes , uh , from this so we'll keep it .

Speaker 2 2:42

We'll

Communication Styles Across Generations

Speaker 2 2:43

keep it short . So let's start with communication style . You and I talk about the importance of telling folks how to communicate with you , giving a communication guide right , if somebody has just started working with you so they understand your style of communication . And in this episode they showed that by lots of comments about different age groups . Case in point step number one Jamie goes to console Roy about , you know , breaking up with Keely , and Roy's like what are you doing ? And what's that face ? He's like that's , it's empathy man like I forgot , old man , you know . And then jamie goes to give him a hug I forgot . Like you all are flinchy because of the war , right ? So all this old man stuff . And then , um , and then you find out , of course will is in there , right , the kit man listening . And uh , and again you get that different generations , and they're not even different generations . What in the real world are they like ? 10 years apart Maybe , but they are showing you that different age groups , everybody has different communication style .

Speaker 1 3:56

Yeah , yeah . So when you said communication , absolutely Something I thought about as I was watching this and it reminded me they heard of Zava , so they might be interested in signing Zava . Yeah , and , and that was a surprise to everybody . And then of course they let him know that they're really talking about Roy and Kelly and he almost faints . And then Roy walks in and they disclose that Trent's actually , you know , going to write a book about the team . I just , you know , we talk about how how , sometimes , when communication not done well , really can cause issues .

Speaker 2 4:58

Yeah , amplifies the problem or creates new ones new ones they gave us .

Speaker 1 5:08

They gave us the , the perfect um counter example of what not to do and , in terms of uh uh , sharing information that probably needs to be delivered with a , with a very well-worded message , message of some sort .

Speaker 2 5:19

Yeah , absolutely , I mean so . I thought the same thing . When Ted came out and they were all upset about something , he immediately jumped to like , oh , is this about us getting Zalva ? That is not how . Like , even if it was , that's not how you message . That it's interesting . You know how when you hear a new word or you run across something you haven't heard in a long time , and then suddenly you see it lots of other places this is coming up for me in the notion of People say to show up as your authentic self , but the reality of it is is you need to show up as your best authentic self . In aabu was coming , that's not his best take on that . It's not how he would have done it . So , yes , you're right , that was the perfect counterexample of what not to do .

Speaker 1 6:25

Yeah , and a reminder of a chat we had with Lorraine Lee and author of Unforgettable Presence . But the best authentic version of yourself , body language matters and if you don't remember that , you can just you can ping your friend Isaac McAdoo , who is an excellent master .

Speaker 1 6:47

Yeah , kinesis at the science of reading body language . But you know , we've we've often talked about just the importance of first impressions and it's critical , right that you put off the right body language and Isaac was able to see in two seconds . Of course it's a TV show , but there was something wrong with Roy and Keely just by looking at the body language .

Speaker 2 7:12

Yeah , that was brilliant . Yeah , so I hadn't even connected that with the notion of communication , but really all around . And people often ask us what is the most important element of leadership , and we often say trust , because that leads to communication and with communication going badly ,

Kindness vs. Weakness in Leadership

Speaker 2 7:31

everything can break down , and I think this really is a good episode that represents that .

Speaker 1 7:36

Yeah , yeah , no doubt All right , so is it my turn .

Speaker 2 7:42

Yeah , yeah . What do you want to talk about ?

Speaker 1 7:45

Well , I want to talk about something we have brought up once or twice before , which is don't take my kindness for weakness .

Speaker 2 7:53

Oh yeah , you know that's a statement that I have had to use out loud to grownups before .

Speaker 1 7:58

So yeah , and you know , we often talk about about Ted and we , we , we , we speak to the fact that , all right , he is kind , he is empathetic , but he also knows when to draw the line and be stern with his message .

Speaker 1 8:19

Yeah absolutely , and I you know we say that all the time and it's not so easy to bring up the specific examples of when he does that . And this episode I thought was perfect how he dealt with Roy , really disrupting an entire locker room , the entire team , by not allowing them to say anything at all To Trent , and he had a great line . You know he wanted to squash the beef and start I'm getting this wrong , but something around starting eating off the vegan menu .

Speaker 2 8:57

He said eat vegan , yeah , and I thought that was like eat your veggies , do what's right for you . But I didn't realize it was the squash , the beef , which is funny .

Speaker 1 9:04

That's good , squash the beef , but you know , do you have any ? I mean you . I think , between the two of us , I think it's pretty obvious , you're kinder than I am , without a doubt .

Speaker 2 9:16

That's not true .

Speaker 1 9:23

What words of motivation and encouragement do you have to those people ? Who really struggle to be that stern person in terms of when they need to be , yeah .

Speaker 2 9:32

Well , goodness knows , we talk a ton about understanding who you are and knowing your core values being critically important and I think when you know that you can set boundaries where you then say like nope , and that's that , is crossing the line . I mean , you and I both know we have a situation where somebody called and was yelling at me because I typically do respond kindly Right , and it was somebody we worked with and my typical response to listen and respond was not working and I actually yelled back , to which my daughter was like texting her dad . Dad , I don't know what your mom's talking to , but this has gone ugly and I wouldn't want to be the person on the other end . So don't like to have to do it often , but you do have to know where your boundaries are so that you draw the line in the sand for other folks . But one part that I thought was really important in the way Ted had that conversation with Roy and remember I was an educator , I was an administrator , so I often had to do classroom observations of other teachers and many times I would see something I didn't agree with and I had to call them out on it because , goodness knows , you know , instruction is not going to get better with proper feedback .

Speaker 2 10:53

So I think learning how to give proper feedback is a good way to still be kind , because , as Brene Brown would say , clear is kind , and one of the models that I've read a good bit about is it's called SBI , which is situation , behavior , impact . So here's the situation . Right , like Roy , the locker room is a hot mess . Behavior , because your ego is in the way right and it's causing tensions to mount . Impact we're going to lose a lot more than just this game to chelsea . Right , and then tied it together with the action that we need to have happen .

Speaker 2 11:41

But then what else did he do ? This was about this situation , not about roy as a human , and he said hallmark movies are , like you know , they're terrible and great at the same time . So it was a still and I love you , roy . But this situation which your communication has impacted needs to change , and I think when I think of don't take my kindness for weakness , I don't like it when I have to sort of get on my high horse and deal with it . I would like to get better about couching it as situation , behavior and impact to be able to have that conversation Honestly . How about you , you know , you've , you've watched me in more of those situations than I've thought about myself or any situations that you remember from like your , really , you know escalation in terms of leadership .

Speaker 1 12:31

Yeah , I mean , I think , I think it .

Speaker 1 12:33

It it has always been something especially younger in my career , earlier in my career , that I struggled with because , as we know , I'm a I'm a people pleaser .

Speaker 1 12:42

It wasn't until I realized and and I probably had a different phrase for it until Brene Brown was , as you mentioned , clear as kind .

Speaker 1 12:53

But you come to the realization and you know the whole approach , that , okay , I am consistently clear with expectations , expectations . I'm also consistently clear with an openness to listen and hear somebody else's perspective on things , I think , which is important . So when you have to be clear and to the point and direct , people will realize , okay , in other situations they they questioned me , they saw where I was coming from , but there comes a point where something so obvious it had , like this with with roy and trent that ted just had to do something about it . And I think throughout the series they have done a great job portraying ted as someone who is very much open to somebody else's perspective , yeah , and building the trust with people that when he does deliver a stern message like you need to squash this beef , roy , it is accepted wholeheartedly and action is taken so much better than the compliment sandwich that some people use in terms of uh so much better feedback .

Speaker 2 14:06

Right , and and when I first came to the company that you worked for , you had already built the trust and that relationship with people . So when you said , like everybody listen , that was I know those were probably one of the first , one of the first things I said about you to you is like , oh , when

Building Trust Through Clear Feedback

Speaker 2 14:21

you talk , people listen because you had built that trust and we're wide open . Um and so , yeah , I think that's very true .

Speaker 1 14:31

Yeah , and it does take a while . I think that is one of the issues of any leader that is new to a position . It's really hard to do that right out of the gate because in essence you're relying on title only and we know , and we've talked about , that never works . You have to set some sort of track record and build that level of trust to get to that point .

Speaker 2 14:54

Which actually leads to one of the other topics , which is how do you get to know folks ? And what did Keely want to do , maybe have a picnic , right ? Well , she wanted to go get some fire . Well , I can never say the word right , nazcu , you know , and have some big wild shaman event . And Ted said , well , I can never say the word right , I'm not school , you know , and have some big wild shaman event . And Ted said , well , I was thinking escape room , you do , you . But having that time outside of the official work to build that relationship and trust is important .

Speaker 1 15:26

Oh , I mean clearly , clearly and again . They presented that so well . You can tell just that office environment was very sterile . Nobody was talking to each other , Nobody was having fun , the interaction between the coworkers was almost non-existent and obviously the interaction between Barbara and Keely was strained at best All business versus all fun . There was some sort of compromise that needs to happen here and to kind of bring it back . Don't take my kindness for weakness . You know Ted demonstrated that really well , but Keely did as well . Barbara really was rude .

Speaker 2 16:11

Inappropriate with Shandy yeah .

Speaker 1 16:12

Yeah , inappropriate , and Keely dealt with it right away by being direct and being clear that that , in essence , was not acceptable . But but , taking the advice from from Ted earlier , she noticed the snow globes and she started to build that connection . It was not outside of work , but it wasn't work related . And how important is that in developing a network of people and a culture that

Creating Team Culture Outside Work

Speaker 1 16:46

is one that could potentially lead to thriving .

Speaker 2 16:49

And that was the brilliant baby step , because it was clear Barbara wasn't gonna go on a picnic with Keely , so to connect in her space . The other part that was brilliant for both Ted and Keely well done , writers again is Ted took Roy in another room , roy took Trent in another room , keely went in another room , roy took Trent in another room , healy went in another room . You don't have those conversations in the crowd , in the public . You have critical conversations , critical feedback , one-on-one , all of the time , even if you need to give it a beat and change rooms .

Speaker 1 17:26

Yeah , and let's segue . You know , you know the types of people that have those conversations in public . It's people with egos . Yeah Well , egos , you know they want , they want other people to know that , that they are the boss or they are the best . So my weak attempt at a segue is Zava .

Egos and Team Chemistry

Speaker 2 17:49

Oh , Zava , and the ego of Zava yeah yeah .

Speaker 1 17:56

So I got to thinking because I'm guessing this maybe doesn't happen as much in education , but in every technology and development group I've always been part of greatest challenges I've ever had in in teams that I've worked on , because ego was the opposite of the culture that I always wanted to build . So I'm curious did you run into that much in education or your experience in other ?

Speaker 2 18:51

industries that you've worked in .

Speaker 2 18:53

Typically in teaching first , teachers have that emotional intelligence right that it doesn't play out that way . I have run into an administrator or two where it was a challenge , because of the ego for sure . But I more saw that diva attitude more amongst in the software space when somebody felt like they were the star player and that can create a toxic culture because I mean it's just dangerous to a team if you don't corral that in and we've definitely talked about that from a personnel perspective , you have a really good performer but they're killing the team and frankly , I feel like I just listened to Gary Vee do a talk about . You've got to fire that person because culture is everything and if you let that ego run the team it's going to be harmful . And I think that's what Jamie's hinting at .

Speaker 2 20:05

At the end of the show where they said they got Ziva and he said the fans aren's going to be harmful . And I think that's what jamie's hinting at . At the end of the show where they said they got zeven , he said the fans aren't going to like that . Now may's bars go on bananas , um , because they just see the striker . But I think jamie sees like you know , we have these problems with me he recognizes the parts of him that were what you know he sees in Zava . So yeah , that's kind of my take on that .

Speaker 1 20:31

Yeah , I agree and let's give Jamie a nod If we were to give out MVPs in terms of personal development for each episode , Jamie took a huge step forward for each episode .

Speaker 1 20:45

Jamie took a huge step forward , Clearly with his empathetic reaction to Roy and Keely , number one , but number two , just exactly like you said , he is the one who sees , rightly so , exactly as you said , because he was once that person . But the fact that the ego of Zava is going to kill , presumably , the team dynamics , that culture , yeah , um , that has been , uh , built up significantly since the middle of season two . You can , you can tell they're in a great spot in terms of locker room chemistry at this point . Yeah , and Jamie's the one , not Ted , not beard , not . You can tell they're in a great spot in terms of locker room chemistry at this point and Jamie's the one , not Ted , not Beard , not anybody else .

Speaker 2 21:34

Jamie is the one who recognizes that there's a risk here in terms of team dynamics . So it's funny you say that the locker room dynamics because at halftime , right after the Roy Trent bit and they want Jamie's idea on what they need to do . Jamie starts the idea hey , when we're running past the middle , sam picks up flawlessly from there and says , yeah , when we get the ball , we need to keep dribbling , and Isaac finishes it . So they are a cohesive unit and if somebody gets in the middle of that , that will be trouble .

Speaker 1 22:04

Yeah , and it feels like that's about to happen .

Speaker 2 22:07

Yes , it does . You know what ? My last comment that I've written down is Jamie is the only one who has done all the work for himself , and he's got now the right kind of confidence you and I talk a lot about . You have to know the authentic version of you to be confident , and that's how you show up as your true self , and we can see James done the work .

Speaker 1 22:33

Yeah , is that the last , last we have anything else ?

Speaker 2 22:37

Last , last , yeah All right .

Speaker 1 22:39

Well then ,

Final Thoughts and Leadership Takeaways

Speaker 1 22:40

that is our whistle whistle . So game's over .

Speaker 2 22:43

but the leadership lessons keep on playing , is our whistle whistle , so game's over , but the leadership lessons keep on playing . Yeah , they do . So if you like this , please be sure to subscribe . Follow us everywhere , like Roy , here , there and everywhere . On social , we're at Lead it , like Lasso , and , of course , you can find us at leaditlikelassocom , and we'd love for you to check out our snarky sidekick of a newsletter workinprogmessai , absolutely .

Speaker 1 23:07

So until next time , stay curious , stay kind and keep leading it like Blasso . Thanks everybody .