Lead it Like Lasso: A Ted Lasso Rewatch Podcast

Leadership Lessons from International Break | S3 Ep 10

• Marnie Stockman and Nick Coniglio • Season 3 • Episode 10

Share episode

🎙️ S3, Ep10 – “International Break” | Lead It Like Lasso: A Ted Lasso Rewatch Podcast
Hosted by Nick Coniglio & Marnie Stockman
đź“š Based on the leadership book Lead It Like Lasso

In this episode, Nick and Marnie dive into the emotionally charged and fast-moving episode International Break. As the season winds down, character arcs are completing and leadership lessons are peaking. From forgiveness to finding identity, they explore what it means to lead through transition.

🔥 In this episode, we unpack:

  • Sam’s exclusion from the Nigerian national team — and how his teammates show solidarity when systems fail.
  • Nate’s quiet redemption — including a powerful moment of healing between father and son.
  • Rebecca’s Lioness Moment — taking a principled stand against the Super League, reminding us that power doesn’t equal ownership.
  • Roy’s return to emotional honesty — through tie-dye, Phoebe’s wisdom, and a handwritten letter to Keeley.
  • Keeley’s fall and rise — with help from May, Rebecca, and a little well-timed lightning.

đź’ˇ Leadership lessons are everywhere:

  • How do you respond when someone around you is treated unfairly?
  • What does your younger self have to teach you?
  • Can you stay true to your character when the pressure is on?

Whether you're a Ted Lasso fan or a student of leadership, this episode will leave you thinking (and maybe a little misty-eyed).

🔔 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share.
📬 Check out our leadership book: https://leaditlikelasso.com

📨 Subscribe to our newsletter: Work in Progmess – https://workinprogmess.ai

#TedLasso #LeadershipPodcast #LeadItLikeLasso #TedLassoRewatch #LeadershipDevelopment #RoyKent #NateTheGreat #RebeccaWelton #Podcast

SPEAKER_00:

Hi again, everyone. I am Nick Caniglio.

SPEAKER_02:

And I'm Marnie Stockman, and this is Lead It Like Lasso, a Ted Lasso Rewatch podcast. We are the co-authors of Lead It Like Lasso, a leadership book for life, your life.

SPEAKER_00:

And this podcast is an extension of many of the elements outlined in our book. We invite you to join us as we take a deep dive into each episode and explore the leadership principles as they play out in the series. And for today's episode, we're diving into season three, episode 10, International Break. Lots going on in this episode.

SPEAKER_02:

So much going on. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

It was, you know, I thought this episode was um it was choppier than most of the other episodes. I mean, it just switched back and forth context like crazy.

SPEAKER_02:

Yep.

SPEAKER_00:

Agreed?

SPEAKER_02:

It yeah, it just cycled through all of the big scenes or all the big character plots repeatedly, multiple times. Because I write it down in order and it's just I loop them, loop them through, loop them through.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, it was crazy.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm trying to decide what that means. Is are the characters feeling a little chaotic? Because it is definitely in a time of shift. Is this signifying a lot of time is passing, you know, or it feels that way? Like they did it for a reason, not just because they knew we were going to be taking notes and it was gonna take us four pages to do.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, if they would have thought that forward in advance, that'd be crazy. But let's do a recap real quick.

SPEAKER_01:

They should check in with us.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, absolutely. So uh let's ping pong thoughts on the episode. Um, it's called International Break, and a lot of the AFC Rushman players went on to their international break, except of course, uh for Sam.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, they all got to play for their international teams. Uh Nate steps away from West Ham, although we don't know that at first, um, and reconnects with his father.

SPEAKER_00:

Yep. And then uh Rebecca is invited to and attends a Super League meeting and really starts to take a bold stand.

SPEAKER_02:

Poor Keely. Her company gets shut down, but she does find some new support by the end, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and Roy uh Roy writes Darn it makes me cry. Yeah, he writes that uh that letter that really touches us uh and touches Keely uh after um realizing and having a bit of a wake-up call throughout the the episode. Is that it? Was there anything else? There was so much else going on.

SPEAKER_02:

So so much, but I think those are the big threads that run throughout, and we'll pick up some of the little finer details along the way.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

All right, Marnie. So, where where do you want to start when we start peeling back the layers on leadership lessons with this episode?

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, let's take a look at the international break announcement. Um I'm gonna ignore the Sam bit for a minute, but how about Danny turning on the dime on his friend Van Dam when he realizes they uh are gonna be pitted against each other? And my, you know, these writers are so clever that I started thinking, what are they trying to get us to learn from this? Because it just looks like Danny's gone off the rails, right? He's off the hinges. And I thought, I wonder if this, you know, there's always some commentary on society in general. Is it that sometimes you're so associated with a group that you are almost indoctrinated into it to the point where you lose friendships over it because you can't see beyond the structure of that group? That was my first thought because there was something there. It wasn't just a bit to make it funny. They're never just doing that to be humorous, there was a reason for it. So that that was what I was thinking is like, oh, can you get so involved in the ideology of a group that you lose the fact that you know people, good people who you love outside that group, and it changed the way you deal with them.

SPEAKER_01:

What do you think? Did that what what did you think about that?

SPEAKER_00:

No, I I I think that's I think that's a strong take for sure. First of all, I think it's Ranny Doha, right? It reminded me a little bit of Led Tasso, just a little bit. Yeah, but it really made me think about uh, you know, the question, I and I, and I see it in my personal life, right? I play golf with a guy who's the nicest guy in the world, but whenever we play in a high-stakes tournament, he turns into this different person. And I always wonder, you know, does does competition reveal who we are, or does it distort us into something something we're not? Um and I think in this case, for sure, Danny's being distorted. This is not truly who Danny is, but but then it leads me to some other things, and I start thinking about okay, that's competition, but in in more of a team environment, a business environment, when when things get stressful, how how do people change? And more specifically, and I I think they they started to reflect this at the end of the end of the episode, the return to normal afterward. Is that something that can be repairable? Like in this case, what would the relationship be repaired with Van Damme and Danny? Will it not? I we'll find out. Um but but I think that's the risk, right? When you're not your consistent and authentic self all the time, uh you you definitely run the risk of ruining and destroying connections and relationships that you have.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, when you said competition, does it bring out the best or worst of us? I think that depends on folks. And I was thinking kind of along the lines of where you were going, which is it's really a stress, right? Competition adds a level of stress. And how is it that you learn to handle that stress? Some of us really like competition, not naming any names, but both of us that's fact that levels up our game, but for others, it really is kind of debilitating. And I think that actually, now that you say that, leads to the next thing, or one of the things I wanted to talk about, which is everybody responds differently. And we had three folks that all had some pretty pretty big things going on with them. Well, we had four um Keely, Sam, Nate, and Roy. And I thought they all took the high road, but they all processed getting there differently. And so I think that is a leadership. That was one of the things I wanted to talk about. Is that too much at once?

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, that was a lot for sure. And and and as an aside, I I think we can tell that the series is coming to a close because they are all completing their their journey and their arc. Um, so it's this was kind of the culmination episode for so many, so many characters, whether, you know, not not all of them. Nate still has a little work to go, but it feels like Roy finally, you know, sees himself outside of what he has uh seen himself this entire series, which is a footballer. Yeah right? He's he's more than that now. And Rebecca is is very much uh come to the realization that it's not all about uh you know beating Rupert for sure. And then Keely was a quick up and down, right? I mean, she was riding high, you know, a little bit of downs for sure with her relationship with Jack, uh, but she just she just lost it all. Um, which is which is kind of well, let's continue with this. Where did you want to go with that specifically? Because I can go off in so many different areas on that.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, my thinking was it's interesting how they each opted to process. So Sam finds out he doesn't make the club and he doesn't say anything. So Sam's gonna hold it in to himself, but he's developed such good friendships that they won't let him. And who comes after him? Jamie Tart. Right. So he he both comes up to him at the locker room, and when Jamie pulls off his uh sweatshirt and has 24 on there, all of Sam's friends are with Sam. So even if Sam's thinking he's in it alone, he's not, his friends won't let him be alone. And then Nate.

SPEAKER_00:

I wanna, I wanna, I wanna stick with that for just a second, uh, just because I I think, you know, it it represents, I think, one of the things that I have always struggled the most with uh in terms of situations that I I didn't know how to handle when I was when I'm in a team corporate environment, which is eventually somebody always, for whatever reason, uh gets unjust treatment. And in this case, Sam's Sam's treatment was unjust thanks thanks to a KUFU, right? And and making sure he did not get on the Nigerian team. Um But you know, how how do you react if you're not the person, but you clearly see that some things going on, especially when you might not have the power to do anything about it. Clearly, nobody in the nobody in that team had immediate power to go to the the decision makers and whoever is making um the team selection for Nigeria. So what did they do? They they supported him, which is probably the only thing that could have been done at that point. But but that's a that's a feeling of lack of power that that I know you and I both want to take control of, yeah, and we can't.

SPEAKER_02:

Um but you just reminded me.

SPEAKER_00:

I just recognize that uh that that that's a really hard situation that we always see, you know, in in whatever environment that we're working on.

SPEAKER_02:

So remember what happened at the end of the last episode with Colin and Ted saying, right, like you don't have to, it's not that we don't care, right? Like you're not alone. We're with you on this, and they are with Sam. They can't do a darn thing about it, to your point. Um, although bless Jamie Tart for doing the best he can.

SPEAKER_00:

Absolutely. It also harkens back to to uh many episodes ago, Sam's Sam's dad and the wisdom that he imparted, right? It's and it it stuck with Sam, and I'm sure it helped him get through this, right? Don't fight back, fight forward, and and that is what Sam will continue to do.

SPEAKER_02:

So that's the other piece of it. Sam has got the strong family connection, and he has peace in that. So he's not thrilled with the way this is happening, but he's not beating himself up because he's had his dad say, like I'm sure his dad is right behind him, and that's what matters. So he's able to handle it. He doesn't feel like he needs it from others, right? He's gonna take it, but others are there for him anyway.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, which is the opposite of how Nate felt. Uh drawing parallels from this this episode.

SPEAKER_02:

So he made the high row, but very different.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. But but he did not feel like he had the family connection. Sure, after he quit, he went home, but it's not like he went home necessarily for connection. He was just trying to get away from the paparazzi in the press and to figure out why he left West Ham. Um, but but we saw in this episode, and there were hints throughout the series, that that there was a little bit of friction between him and his dad, but what a powerful exchange um, you know, with his dad and the the acknowledgement that you know what his dad said, I messed up, right? I did I didn't know how to parent what he called a genius in in Nate and the fact that he's brilliant. Um, and he acknowledged that that was a blessing and a curse, and that he pushed him probably too hard. And the fact that he gave him kind of that that whether you're successful or not, I just want you to be happy. And that that all of a sudden armed Nate, in my opinion, with the confidence that it seems like Sam has had this whole time in getting through things uh with that family connection and knowing, okay, it's okay if I do what I do. My I got my dad having my back.

SPEAKER_02:

I thought it was interesting that in Nate's bit, he's going through the closet, he's going through old boxes, he's going through all the pictures. So he is going through his past, trying to find who he really is, I think. Right? Yeah. And and the place where he's stuck is the relationship with his dad. And that's the part that he can't resolve for himself. So I agree completely when his dad has the conversation. Um, and really, I mean, we talk about this all the time with the business of you. Parents are always stressed about, they just want their kids to be happy, and it's so hard to know you want to help them, right? Um, and how to help them. And and he said, I got it wrong, because no parents get it all the way right. Uh, so I think that was also interesting to hear.

SPEAKER_00:

Did you did you think at all about? I know we've talked um in social media, we've talked about the whole notion of finding empathy, and sometimes it helps to look at yourself as you know, as a young person, right? And that's exactly what Nate did. And I was like, I wonder if that kind of unlocked other things like finding the violin and then speaking with his dad a little bit, just just taking a glimpse of his younger self and remembering what it was like uh to not have all the stresses and in the world and just have all dreams and hopes.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, that's another connection because Rebecca, I don't want to jump to that, but she also looks in the mirror and sees her younger self. So, yeah, that's what the studies say is if you can look at a picture of your younger self, that you can build empathy for yourself. Oh, good find.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. So let's since you brought her up and Rebecca, we've had this whole notion of the super league. And that's that's where the world's most powerful clubs and you know, most expensive plug clubs are are getting together, in essence, squeezing out the little guys. And uh, that's a real thing. I mean, that has been talked about in the world of football and the world of soccer um for for years now. And I think it's pretty cool that they brought that that whole real life, you know, thing to to this show, but they they presented it in their own their own special way. Um, so the whole notion with Rebecca, you know, reconnecting, if you want to call it that, with Rupert, Rupert inviting her, um uh because he thought it would look good to have a woman at the Super League meeting. And uh, you know, Higgins, you know, gives the advice to Rebecca, as Higgins would often would often do, and I'm paraphrasing here, you know, who cares why you got a seat at the table? You know, just do what you do, you know, do what's what, and that, you know, take advantage of that opportunity. What do you think about that?

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I mean, I think that uh first, again, Higgins, brilliant always. And so many times people do get wrapped up in other people's um underlying, you know, intentions that they miss out on a good opportunity for themselves because they can't get out of you know what they're thinking other people are thinking. And so you just need to take it from how like look at it from your own perspective. So often we talk about looking at it from someone else's perspective, but when you're given an opportunity like that, why not rise to that opportunity and like the opportunity to show them wrong in that particular case, right? Um yeah, that's I've certainly been the only woman in a room a lot of times, so I uh I I heard what Higgins was saying. Um and first shout out to Peter Bergman, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Who yeah, the little guest cameo is an owner in there for sure.

SPEAKER_01:

So I don't know that I had any other deep thoughts on it other than uh yeah, go team Higgins always.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. I I I did it, it did, you know, we often in our other life uh, you know, we we talk about uh career development and we talk about young people and uh the fact that it's it's not necessarily equitable because uh you know those with the resources find are able to to absolutely find career coaches and pay thousands of dollars to get into college, just the application process, right? And that kind of reminded me of what this whole Super League notion is was all about. It's it's it's it was for the rich, it was for the wealthy. Um and at the end of the day, it's the little guy that ends up uh losing out. Uh, but I do I'd be remiss if I didn't didn't talk uh Rebecca's quote, which I just loved, right? Which is just because we own this teams doesn't mean that they belong to us.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

That's that's I wish some owners of my favorite franchises out there would have that that same uh mindset for sure.

SPEAKER_02:

I think there are a lot of Jets fans that would agree.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Um love the scenes with Roy Kent. I did. There were there were many of them. Uh Happy Uncle Day to Uncle Roy. Which I absolutely love the fact that that it showed how far, you know, I thought we'd invite your best friend, Jamie. And they say He's not my best friend. Yeah, who's your best friend? My best friend, Isaac? Oh come on, it's it's not Isaac. Um but uh the the the one thing that I picked out, and I I thought it was interesting, and I I have to I have to find my notes here, but I love the scene where he he gave him the kit uniform from the World Cup from 2014, and he of course uh uh spelled his name with a U instead of an E. And Phoebe's like, you owe me a pound, Jamie. And um and Jamie's like, I didn't say nothing. You know, I didn't say nothing. And Phoebe says, Well, you made me think it. And basically it's the same thing. And I was like, wow, that's we talk about connecting with people and how important words and language are. And I thought, man, Phoebe has nailed it. It doesn't matter, right, that the words don't actually come out. If you're hinting at something, and this could be both a positive and a negative, and don't explicitly say it, you know, people get the message of what's coming across. And I think far too often we we fall back on this whole premise of, well, I didn't actually say those words, so you can't hold me to account for it. And I think Phoebe just gave us a great little reminder in this funny, funny scene that you know what you you just because you didn't just because I you didn't say it doesn't mean you didn't think it. And um I just love that line. So that's all I got on that.

SPEAKER_02:

That's exactly with Roy and Jamie being best friends, right? They never said it. That's the right thing. They were adamantly denying it, but it just wasn't true. Um, well, so first, as a Roy D. Biv fan from way back and all about the oh, you know, she dyed him a shirt with red, orange, yellow. Cracked me the heck up. Of course, the scene of him wearing it, hilarious, and how that's just not him. But then at the end, he comes in with a dark, deep blue, purple, black tie-dye. He's found his balance, right? He's found the zen. He can't go, he's not all woo-woo tie-dye, but he also is not just in a deep dark hole. He's found the balance for Roy Kent.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, let's thank uh Miss Leanne Bowen for that for sure, for just letting him know you're you're you seem more free, right? Less stuck. And I think I think that's a case where somebody actually said the words and it processed for for Roy, and he realized that he was the mess. Um, and and he absolutely needed to apologize uh to Keely with what else? A handwritten note.

SPEAKER_02:

His handwriting cracks me up so hard on that. Just he's got a card, he's written in this tiny little scroll in the top. Uh I mean handwritten in today's world, right? It what do we say all of the time? Character revolution, it's your character that will help you stand out. It's the human elements. And tell me that handwritten note didn't just nail it for them.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I mean, it's well, certainly AI did not write that handwritten note. Yeah, for sure. You know, another step in and again, as you said, right, uh he just showing vulnerability, uh, opening up to her. And um I thought that was pretty cool. Anything with Keely?

SPEAKER_02:

Of course. So Nate's processing at home, right? Not with his dad, but we're like we're getting there. Sam is in a good place, processing in his own way. What's Keely do? Go gets drunk, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and so first time she ever met May, by the way. That I I thought that was crazy weird.

SPEAKER_02:

How yeah, how is it that this is the first time she's met May? But when I think about it, I thought, oh well, I we've only seen the soccer team in there one time. So I guess that makes sense, but that was surprising. And May, does it is it short for anything? Maybe okay. Maybe maybe oh my goodness. Brilliant. Um, but you know, May tells her, you know, if you get to the top of the mountain, the only thing that's left is lightning. And then Keely asks, if is lightning good or bad, and May says, Well, it depends on if you're ready for it. Just, you know, you gotta keep climbing. Reminds me of Simon Sinek's Infinite Game. You don't want to get to you know the top of whatever and say you're done because where are you going from there? Uh so I thought, uh, you know, I just that is a way people process, and but in the end, that is not what solved it for her. It was connecting with others, was talking with May, was talking with Rebecca, was talking with Roy, right? That that's what's going to make that connection. It is not getting drunk and wallowing in your grief that you know that's gonna solve your problem.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, but but in essence, that was, you know, while the team was on their international break, that was Killy's little break, right? And I mean, we don't know how many days that played out. I was I was having a hard time figuring out like when she stumbled, when she came home, was was this after a day drinking uh with May, or was this the next day? Um but yeah, I I think um you know, I I think the whole notion, I'm a little disappointed because that that whole scenario of getting the funding polls from Jack, again, another demonstration of poor communication because Jack didn't even didn't even let her know. But then so quickly getting funded uh through Rebecca, that that was a really quick resolution, which you know, so many of the things in the show are relatable to people. And this just seemed like a TV moment. Okay, let's let's kind of wrap this up. But I guess as I hear you speak about it, you know, part of it is she had built the connections, just like you said, um, over time that that helped her uh get out of this this mess real quick. So I guess I can buy it a little bit. So you've changed my mind.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, thank you. I I argued hard for that, I could tell.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. Wow, we've we've talked about a lot. Was there anything that uh we missed based on based on your notes?

SPEAKER_02:

There's something at the beginning that reminded me of our friend Bob Berg, right, author of the Go Giver. Um uh Ted is not about gossip, right? Uh he doesn't so it's Trent and Ted and Rebecca and what do you think happened to Nate, you know, and and what reminded me of it is uh Bob Berg always talks about reverse gossip. Where could you go and say good things about people, uh you know, as opposed to negative things. Uh so I just shout out to Bob.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. Well, whenever we can have a shout out for Mr. Berg, I think that's that's perfect.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, I had another one uh with May. First, Killy says she was in a bunch of poop, and uh and May says, well, that's what makes things grow, right? Because it is true, you know, there's so much. I follow uh the Duke uh university professor who teaches a class on learning to fail because it is in those opportunities where you learn to grow. And then May says the line May's like a side Higgins at the bar, as many bartenders are, frankly. Um follow your gut instead of pretending to be excited about what someone else is telling you.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, that's a good one. Always follow the gut.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah. So I thought that was she said that before the mountain striking piece.

SPEAKER_01:

Um, love the call back to Rebecca saying, is this an effing joke?

SPEAKER_02:

To Trent saying that at the beginning. She said that on the uh and everything else, all the places I have starred and thought this is a leadership moment, uh, we've kind of already covered. Yeah, how about you?

SPEAKER_00:

Anything else on your list Yeah, I I I think I think we got it all. I think uh a little funny that it's called international break, I think, because a lot of times people think of uh break in two different ways, right? One is oh my gosh, I gotta start over, and the other is a recalibration. And it feels like this this was such a recalibration episode for for so many characters or a completion uh of their character arcs. I um there's just a lot going on. So uh of course, we're excited for the uh last couple of episodes. Uh so I'm guessing uh it's time for our whistle whistle. The game's over here. Uh, but as always, leadership lessons keep on playing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, they do. So, as a reminder, uh you can find us here, there, and every effingware on socialware at leaditelasso. We've got leaditlicklasso.com. Uh, love for you to like, follow, subscribe, whatever this particular algorithm's asking you to do, that really helps us. Uh, and you can always check out our snarky sidekick of a newsletter if you have Roy Kent giving career advice. It would happen at workinprogm.ai.

SPEAKER_00:

It sure would. So until next time, stay curious, stay kind, and keep leading it like lasso. Thanks, everybody.

Head Shot

Marnie Stockman

Host
Head Shot

Nick Coniglio

Host