S3, Episode 3: The Magic of Aging and Not Giving any F's

Neva and Maria talk about how getting older reshapes witchcraft, spirituality, and identity from performance and aesthetics into something grounded, honest, and livable. Along the way, they unpack the millennial “witchy” era, call out common new age traps, and land on practices that help them hold both rage and love without bypassing themselves.  

• aging as a shift from aesthetic to authenticity  
• millennial witch starter pack nostalgia and the pressure to look witchy  
• not giving a fuck as a spiritual upgrade  
• nature connection through tree hugging, offerings, and garden meditation  
• twin flames as a cover for toxic dynamics  
• love and light as spiritual bypassing and why shadow work matters  
• fury vs hate and learning where to put big emotions  
• repeating numbers, signs, and assigning meaning with intention  
• ethical questions around crystals and spiritual consumerism  

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✨ Produced & Edited by Maria Ruscitti, LLC

🎶 Huge thanks to Nick J Ludwig Music for composing and mixing our theme song, "Go Do This."

🔮Neva Rowland (she/they) is a multi-faceted creator whose work blends spirituality and art. They work as a state-employed civil servant to pay the bills and feed their art supply and tarot collection addiction. 

🔮Maria (she/they) is a mother to two gremlins. She has a long-term partner. Maria has been a public school educator for 20 years, focusing on inner city schools and diversity education. They have been a practicing witch for most of her life, starting with Italian folklore witchcraft as a child and growing into her own traditions. They love Moon and High Holiday Rituals(‘Cule Yule!), Tarot Pulls, candle and sigil magic and reading and art! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aINFidzRtj0

Transcript

Welcome And What We’re Exploring

SPEAKER_01 0:14

Hi, friend! Hello, friends! And hello, friends listening. Whether this is your first time or your twelfth time, I don't know how many episodes we have. This is the Lost Girls Podcast. And I am one of your hosts, Neva.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

And I am your other host, Maria. And I think we're up to like high 20s. Hell yeah. I think. Maybe even more than that. I gotta check because we've divided it into seasons, so I'm actually not sure how many episodes we have.

SPEAKER_01 0:47

We're like basically professionals at this point.

SPEAKER_02 0:49

I mean, I think that's we qualify.

SPEAKER_01 0:51

Yeah. Yeah. That's that's like the threshold, 20. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:54

Three seasons is like an incredibly successful networked show. So I'm saying we yeah, we're professionals. Heck yeah.

unknown 1:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:04

We just need our first sponsorship. So anyone out there who wants to respond.

SPEAKER_01 1:09

Maybe, maybe the person on the on your bag. Brendan Fraser. If only. If only. Brendan Fraser, if you're listening.

SPEAKER_02 1:17

If you're listening, dear God, please be listening. And also, maybe don't, because we've said some. I know. I've I've said some shit. And I'm sorry if you heard that.

SPEAKER_01 1:31

Just objectifying a little bit. Yikes. I'm just gonna give a mosha.

SPEAKER_02 1:38

Okay. So today's episode. I was like, whoo, I could go off. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna.

SPEAKER_01 1:45

Look

Aging And Evolving Witchcraft Practice

SPEAKER_01 1:46

how look how wise you are. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:49

In my elder age of 42. Yikes. Which relates to the topic of our episode today. Look at you. What a good segue. You're such a good co-host. We're talking about aging in witchcraft and just in general, but just like as to half female identifying-ish people. What that's like as you get older. Like I feel like practice and witchcraft and spirituality looks a lot different in your late 30s and early 40s than it did when we were teenagers, early 20s, whatever that may be.

SPEAKER_01 2:31

Summoning snowstorms, you know, the usual thing.

SPEAKER_02 2:39

Accidentally cursing people, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 2:43

You know, things normal teenagers do.

SPEAKER_02 2:46

Yes, absolutely. Not realizing that your words have power. Oh boy. Yikes. Yeah, I know. I feel like both of us really felt that.

unknown 2:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:57

That is a conversation I feel like I have with Avery a lot. I'm like, will you stop saying shit because words actually mean things?

SPEAKER_02 3:06

Yes, yes, words have power. And they become what your brain believes. I have a note that just says millennial a millennial witch starter pack, which I think is really interesting for like all of us teeny boppers in like the late 90s and early 2000s, who are like, we're witches!

SPEAKER_01 3:26

And like what we thought that meant. Like the movie The Craft is coming to mind. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 3:34

I mean that's like my main a literal quote I had a girl tell me to my face. Maria. Because I wrote it down. I had to go find it in my journal, and I did. Because I'm a loser like that. You can't dress and be so happy and be a witch.

SPEAKER_01 3:55

How old when did this when did someone say this to you? 17. You can't dress and be so happy and be a witch.

SPEAKER_02 4:04

Yes, because the movie Their Crafted came out and everyone's like, well, if you're a witch, then you're like dark and deep and gaffy and depressed. And I was like, I'm none of those things. Like I'm depressed, but the c like the Robin Williams kind of depressed. Like I'm a fucking delight to be around till I kill myself. Jesus. Sorry. That took a turn. If you want some insight into Teen Angelia. But yeah, it was there was like a certain aesthetic you had to subscribe to to be considered witchy, air quotes. And it was like black lace chokers, a million cross necklaces. And I was like, I just want to wear my orange pants and my smiley face t-shirts.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

And so, okay, so just for comparison, you know, like I wasn't doing anything purposeful or on purpose until probably mid-20s. I would say. And then I was like, oh my god, what the fuck? And then nothing again till my mid-30s.

SPEAKER_02 5:23

Yeah, I had like inklings of it all through my teens. And then there were like, because I was conflicted because there was all of this like Italian folklore stuff that I was learning from my family that I was like, oh, this is just folklore practice. I'm like, no, this is witchcraft, people, but whatever. It's generational witchcraft. It just wasn't called that. Yeah. So I had that, and I was like, oh my God, you're so weird. And I was like, oh my God, what do you think? I didn't realize what it was

The Pressure To Look Witchy

SPEAKER_02 5:55

until I was like well into my 20s. And then I worried a lot about, do I look witchy enough? Do I own enough maxi skirts? Man. Yeah. You know, I think like carried me through into my 30s too. I think I like really worried about, well, no one's gonna take me seriously if I'm, you know, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

Don't wear maxi skirts and a thousand bracelets and I like I get that. You know, there are some spaces that I share, you know, with other people. And there are younger people in their, you know, early to mid-20s. And, you know, I'm not discounting them for their experience, but they're they are also, I can tell that they are going for an aesthetic. And, you know, no judgment. I'm going to I know.

SPEAKER_02 6:55

I'm right there with you. And I'm like, it's like there's nothing wrong with it.

SPEAKER_01 7:00

Because otherwise, how are people going to know, Mario?

SPEAKER_02 7:03

Right. I think it's the oh, now I don't give a shit if people know, which is the biggest difference between between then and now, it's like, ah, the magic of not giving a fuck. Like, yeah. Oh man. So if I want to do my rituals, you know, on a random night with Doritos, then I will.

SPEAKER_01 7:30

So since I've been in my Mesa Carrier course, I've been connecting. I mean, I had already been connecting with like the trees on on our property, which for context, we have three maple trees and a um Bradford fucking pear tree. Oh my god, Bradford pear. I don't connect with the Bradford pear. I'm like, sorry, like you are an invasive species. Sorry, not sorry.

SPEAKER_02 7:59

The Bradford pears the colonizer of trees. They are. Let's be fair. They're the John Smith from the UK of fucking trees. Fuck Bradford pears. Sorry. They're everywhere in Connecticut. And I love getting out of the car and smelling dirty semen vagina every time. Fucking sucks. Okay, I'm done. Connecting with your maple trees. Please tell me.

SPEAKER_01 8:25

Anyway. And so like two of them are right dead out in the front of the yard. And I'm just like, well, I guess all these people going by are gonna see me like hugging my tree. And I don't fucking care. Or like leaving an offering for my tree and whatever. I love that. That's so cute. So yeah, that that took a minute to before I was like, fuck like they're not even they're not looking at me anyway. They're looking at the road. And if they do if they if they do look at me, they're like, what the fuck? And then they're down the street and they forgot. Like, was that was that woman hugging a tree?

SPEAKER_03 9:06

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 9:09

No, they're probably like, is that little girl hugging a tree? Or since I have short hair now, is that little boy hugging a tree? Where are his parents? Why is that teenage boy hugging a tree?

SPEAKER_02 9:28

It's fine, he's probably gay. Jump on you. Sure am Oh man. Yeah, I don't know. I just like I wrote down a bunch of cringy things that I thought were real too. Like twin flames. And just the idea, I feel like this is such a trap too, for like younger, especially now, for younger teens and early 20 people. It it's like a code to be just be stuck in toxic relationships.

SPEAKER_01 10:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:07

They're my twin flame. No, they're not, sis. You're your own fire, all on your own.

SPEAKER_01 10:11

I also think there's an element of new age spirituality that is very steeped in colonialism and patriarchy.

SPEAKER_02 10:21

Yeah, they're trying to like take it back.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

Yeah. And and I think people get trapped in that sometimes, which is why, gosh, I don't maybe this is just the side of social media that I find myself on, but I feel like I've seen a lot of like, I'm an ex-witch and now I'm a Christian. And and this is what you need to look out for in Target. And I'm like, oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 10:48

Yeah, I mean, once they started smelling, smelling, selling smudge kits at like pottery barn and target, I think all bets were off. Yeah. But yeah, there's a lot of like, well, I used to be a rebellious woman with my own thoughts, and now I'm not. Now I just follow whatever the men tell me. Cool.

SPEAKER_01 11:15

How's that working out for you? There's a line in a song, and you might know the song. Some choose the cage because they like the guild.

SPEAKER_02 11:26

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

Yeah. I know a person who like she literally believes that she is incapable of living by herself, taking care of herself. She truly believes that she needs a man in order to survive.

unknown 11:53

Gross.

SPEAKER_01 11:54

I agree. That's like so gross to me. I agree.

unknown 12:00

Like ew.

SPEAKER_01 12:01

And you know, we all have our own shit that we're dealing with. Sure.

SPEAKER_02 12:06

But that is some that's a that's a big pile of shit, I'll tell you what.

SPEAKER_01 12:11

Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is. Oh.

SPEAKER_02 12:15

Yeah, that's so rough. It's like you don't even I feel like everyone's like, oh, teenagers are so volatile and there's so much angst and whatever. And I'm like, I'm so much angrier now than I ever was as a teenager. Don't get me wrong, I was angry then too. You've known me for a while. That's kind of my base emotion.

SPEAKER_01 12:39

You know what I decided recently? Okay, so well, first of all, my phrase now is what would Fred Rogers do? I love that. And because, like, I I really do truly believe that love is what's going to save us and get us through. And that's not to say that I'm suddenly love and light. That's not what I'm saying. I know it's that. I know it's that. I just feel like I need to put that out there. Yeah, just go. But like, I don't know. I still haven't decided what threads so the platform. I still haven't decided what that is for me. But there was a week a while back where I was just fucking pissed off. And I was like, fuck this and fuck that and fuck you and fuck this other thing. And

Not Caring Anymore Feels Like Freedom

SPEAKER_01 13:26

then like two days later, I would post something like love and bluff and butterflies. And someone commented, like, how can you post this when all you post is like hateful stuff? And I'm like, there is a big difference between fury and hate. Yes, correct. Like they are not the same.

SPEAKER_02 13:44

They're not the same. They're not the same. Like I am full of both rage and love.

unknown 13:49

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 13:50

You will never find someone who will love you as fucking angrily and ferociously as I will. Which is probably why all my students are like, Miss Cheedy, you're crazy. But I think, you know, they know I care about them in a way that is extremely protective. Yeah. You know? Yeah. And I feel like that about all of my people. And about a lot of things. And that creates a lot of rage and a lot of love. And it's like, I don't know where to put it all. But I get that. It's like I'm not out there actively hating. Like, that's exhausting. And I don't want that.

SPEAKER_01 14:31

No. Yeah. There's there's too many people that have just like fallen into that. And so circling this, bringing this back to what our topic was supposed to be, I think I think, you know, when you're younger, it's harder to make that distinction. Yeah. And it's and because, well, no one enjoys the feeling of anger. Like it's not a fun emotion. Maria might disagree. Um but I'm not saying it's fun. Okay, yeah, no, keep going. Anyway, my point was it can be easy to fall into the new age love and light. Yes. You know, BS and completely bypass all your other emotions and just stuff them down deep where no one will ever find them.

SPEAKER_00 15:31

And you never have to look at them ever, ever again.

SPEAKER_02 15:34

If I never deal with my shadows, they'll never come out. Love and light only, good vibes only. Peace and love in the universe. Alright. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:46

And I think that's that's a distinction that a lot of people miss because yes, love and light is important, and it is not the only thing, and you can't have one without you know the darkness.

SPEAKER_02 16:02

No. I think it's it's impossible to think that like you could only be love and light. And I'm like, I'm sorry. You're not Alaska in the summertime. Like you need you need good one. Thanks. Like you need darkness too.

SPEAKER_01 16:21

Yeah. Because that's burnt out in the light. Well, that's part of the human experience. That's like the whole point of why our souls incarnated here was to experience all the things. And if you're only allowing yourself to experience one side of the things, then you're doing an entire disservice to the whole reason why you came here. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:44

I would agree with you 100%. So what would Fred Rogers do? Or like Steve Irwin or LeVar Burton?

SPEAKER_01 16:52

I think those are all great examples. I I think I I texted you this, but like the day my period started, I was home alone and I watched a documentary about Mr. Rogers' neighborhood. And I was just fucking just and the thing is, for like three or four days prior, I'd been I like I'm like, I feel like I need to cry. And I just feel like I can't. I'm like, maybe if I just sit here quietly and meditate, nothing. And then I watch a documentary on Fred Rogers and just fucking just it wasn't even like bawling. I wasn't sobbing, it was just like tears just running down my face for an hour.

SPEAKER_02 17:38

Oh I feel that so hard. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:45

Because we just we need more Fred Rogers in this world.

SPEAKER_02 17:48

We really, really do. Yeah. Oh. Mike, what great examples of non-toxic masculinity.

SPEAKER_01 17:58

I have a tarot deck, and the King of Cups is Fred Rogers. And it's like, you know, in Mr. Rogers' neighborhood when he's like sitting on his little bench with his little cardigan, he's like changing his shoes. Like that's that's that's the image of him changing his shoes. So I'm just like, that is like King of Cups perfectly.

SPEAKER_02 18:18

It is King of Cups. That's perfect. It is.

SPEAKER_01 18:20

So now anytime anytime I pull a King of Cups, I'm just like Mr. Rogers.

SPEAKER_02 18:24

Mr. Rogers. Oh, I love that. Yeah, I'll probably associate that now. Yes, correct. Mr. Rogers. Wow. Okay. What else? Well, what else?

SPEAKER_01 18:41

We went on a bit of a tangent.

SPEAKER_02 18:42

We did go on a bit of a tangent, but that's fine. Because it's not like I had a whole lot of oh god, I just have something that says Tumblr slash MySpace astrology posts. Which to be fair, I now do the same shit on Instagram. So Uh-huh. Yeah. I was like, but I feel like it was like such a like if you were into astrology back in the early 2000s, you were like into astrology and it was your whole personality. And it was like. And

Twin Flames And New Age Traps

SPEAKER_02 19:20

I didn't even like get that far into it. I would just like post like astrology posts every once in a while, and people would be like, oh my god, she's a wet. Because you posted about like being a Taurus and what that's like. Oh my goodness. It was such like a huge indicator that it like just isn't now. Which I think is funny. Like it's been completely normalized.

SPEAKER_01 19:45

Okay, this is weird. Like this conversation has like a memory resurfacing. Ooh.

unknown 19:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 19:55

Take your time because it feels like it's really locked away in the depth there. I don't know what we're gonna get. I think it's gonna be good.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

It's just okay, so like you said early, early aughts, and so I was like, how old would I have been? And that's because you're you you're a bit older than, you know. Yes. Like when you were in high school, I would have been in middle school. Yeah. Sometimes it was just reminding me of like in middle school, I kind of started hanging out with like those like quote unquote bad girls. Oh, you bad girl, yeah. You know, who were definitely watching things like the craft smoking clove cigarettes. Probably.

SPEAKER_02 20:40

Yeah. Yep. Wearing like short pleated skirts.

SPEAKER_01 20:43

Yep. Yeah. And just and just being all like dark and moody and mysterious.

SPEAKER_02 20:48

I was like, I don't get it. It's like I do not get it. I tried. I tried for a hot second. I was like, nope, this isn't me.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

Well, and then and then at some point, I don't I don't know if maybe we had like different lunch periods or like something shifted, and I was like, Well, I guess I'm done hanging out with you now, and I'm gonna go hang out with uh with the other people who are also in band and sports and my smart kid classes because you all are in like the dumb kid classes. Right.

SPEAKER_02 21:21

It's like, oh right, you're like just because, well, you have other reasons. Got it. We're not the same. Understood.

SPEAKER_01 21:31

Well, and then like I stayed the night. I think it might the shift might have happened. I stayed the night at one of their houses. It was just like a normal sleepover, which I know you never got to experience.

unknown 21:45

Nope.

SPEAKER_01 21:46

Um and I I was like, Yeah, I d you know, I never I didn't say this out loud, but I think in my head, I was just kinda like, I think I'm done with this French.

SPEAKER_02 21:58

I love that there's like Yep. This has run its course.

SPEAKER_01 22:04

Yeah. And you know exploring and now I'm done. Well, and you know, like there's literally like 35 kids in my graduating class, so it's not like Oh my god. You know, like I saw everyone every fucking day from kindergarten through twelfth grade.

SPEAKER_02 22:20

You know shit. So you guys knew everything about each other.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

Yeah. But there's a difference between being friends outside of school and like saying hi to each other in the hallway or whatever. Right. You know. So yeah, I don't it it's it's just weird because even like in college, I would find myself in the friend group of all like the stoners. And so like all those kids that I hung out with in middle school and then stopped hanging out with in high school, they turned into the stoners. 100%. Yes, can come. And like, and I'm not, right? And so my whole life, I'm like, why do I keep finding myself hanging out with stoners? Like, nothing wrong with that. That's fine. If that's what you want to do, I totally don't care. And like they're always why am I here? Yes, and I still don't have a real good answer for that.

SPEAKER_02 23:20

No, I really I think, oh god, because oh wow, that yes, 100% yes. Also, me. Um boy. I just remember being at a party and looking around and being like, why? Like, why am I here? Like, like in college, surrounded by these people who are like drunk off their asses, getting high, and they're having a great time, and that's awesome. Yeah, and it's great, and they're talking about like whatever the fuck they're talking about, and I'm like, cool. Anyone want to talk about like educational philosophy or like what bands they're listening to?

unknown 24:08

Like, no.

SPEAKER_01 24:09

Well, and then there's an there there's also like did I like fake my way into this group?

SPEAKER_02 24:16

Did I mask my way into this group? It's it's wild.

SPEAKER_01 24:25

It's wild. Well, and the thing is because I was a music major, it just sort of came with the territory.

SPEAKER_02 24:35

Yeah, there's a real distinct like divide, I feel like, in music between like music kids who are stoners and music kids who are in AP classes.

SPEAKER_03 24:44

Yes. And yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:47

And I know because I have one of those kids. Actually, I might have both of those kids. It's a little too early to tell. But still, oh man. I don't know. Maybe it's just because we were I don't know. Like, it was never hard for me to have deep conversations. And I think this is the same for you two.

SPEAKER_01 25:15

Yeah. And well, I was the the text I sent you guys yesterday as an example.

SPEAKER_02 25:23

Wall of text.

SPEAKER_00 25:25

Fucking love it.

unknown 25:27

Oh god.

SPEAKER_00 25:30

Like, I swear I'm not high, but I have an idea for what reality is. It's like, you've discovered the matrix.

SPEAKER_02 25:40

I love that both Gila and I are like, Diva, this is just the Breath of the Wild video game, which is an open world video game. And also the matrix. Yes, that's what we've seen once. 20 years ago. I just uh I couldn't stop laughing when you said I was like, yes, correct. You have discovered reality. It's all a simulation. This is all ridiculous. What are we even fucking doing here? But like, yeah, I was never particularly like, not that I'm not good at small talk, but I was always like, let's dive into the shit. Yeah you know, so maybe it lends itself to your soul. Yeah, I think it lends itself to those groups more, especially when you're younger. It's like not that, you know, the band kids or the ja or whatever other group aren't having deep conversations. I just think there's people shy away from it more in those spaces because it makes you vulnerable and people don't like to be vulnerable. And so and I was just like, I don't know, what's your trauma? Let's compare.

SPEAKER_01 26:47

You know, like well, and that kind of makes sense. There is, you know, I think those the first, you know, group of kids that I found myself, and they definitely, they definitely had some shit going on. Yeah. And I think I related to that, but their shit was uh bigger than my shit.

SPEAKER_02 27:08

It's like your shit is different than mine. Got it.

SPEAKER_01 27:13

You know, like Yes, I do know. I had I had some shit, but their shit was like whooo shit.

SPEAKER_02 27:20

Right.

SPEAKER_01 27:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:21

Well, we're in our own, we're in our friend group. This friend group was pretty good.

SPEAKER_01 27:26

Yeah. It's pretty great. Well, and I, you know, that's also the cool thing about being an adult. Well, on the one hand, you get to choose your friend group, but on the other hand, it's like, how do you make friends?

SPEAKER_02 27:38

Yes. Oh my god. So hard. Like, I feel really good about where my friend group is now.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:47

Like we've been and it's been steady and consistent for however many years. And I have friends of mine who I've been friends with since college, since high school, which is nice. But there have been doozies in and out of the friend group where you're just like, hmm, that was a mistake I had to learn. Or, wow, really glad that's not happening anymore. And like, it's like these people just show up in my simulation and just

Rage Vs Hate And Shadow Work

SPEAKER_02 28:15

teach me lessons I needed to be taught. Yeah. And then it's like, okay, we're moving on now. Thank you for the lesson. Goodbye forever.

SPEAKER_01 28:25

So this is something that I've been sitting with. We're totally not discussing what we had talked about discussing.

SPEAKER_02 28:30

That's whatever. Hey, hey, it's our show. We can do whatever we want. I do whatever the fuck I want. I do whatever. You're not my mom. I was gonna say you're not my dad. Tell me which parent you have an issue with. Damn. Talk about Freudian slips. Whoo, mama. What was I even going to say? Ah! I forgot it. It'll come back to me. I'm so sorry. It's okay.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

Oh no. It's alright. It'll come back to me. What we're talking about. Maybe it'll help me.

SPEAKER_02 29:06

Okay. What were we talking about? This is good. It's good that my memory isn't completely shot. Maybe I hung around those stoners too much. But we like having deep conversations. We're good at that. People showing up on our simulations and being a lesson. Friend groups, making friends. It's our show. We can do what we want. As far as I got. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:33

Nope. It's gone. It might come back. It might come back. Can we circle back to the Millennial Witch starter kit?

SPEAKER_02 29:41

Oh, yes, please.

SPEAKER_01 29:42

Because okay. I feel like. What would you add? Okay, so this goes back to childhood, like elementary childhood and like making mud pies. Ooh, yes. Like, why did we do that?

SPEAKER_02 30:00

I don't know. Like Okay. Do you want to hear the saddest, most Italian little kid thing ever? Oh, yes. Instead of making mud pies, because I didn't know what mud pies were, I would I would make cappuccino. So I would mix dirt and water until it was frothy and then put in and be like, I'm in the cappuccino.

SPEAKER_01 30:22

And that was like my version of mud pies. You are way fancier than I was.

SPEAKER_02 30:29

I don't think it's fancy, it's just what I knew. Just me and my cousin Luigi sitting in the backyard covered in dirt. Making it the cappuccinos.

SPEAKER_01 30:39

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Pathetic. Like my mom would give us like um like aluminum pie pans. Oh, cool. And and so yeah, put the mud in there, but then we'd like have sticks and like rocks and like little grass clippings and like flowers.

SPEAKER_02 31:00

You were doing mason work. Were we?

SPEAKER_01 31:07

Well, I mean, a brick is basically mud. Yeah, it's mud and straw.

SPEAKER_02 31:11

Like the old school ones. Yeah. Look at you go. Look at me go.

SPEAKER_01 31:17

And now I just get muddy in my garden.

SPEAKER_02 31:20

I think that's pretty great.

SPEAKER_01 31:22

Yeah, I have so many weeds to pull. The garden basically looks like it's green carpet right now, and it's not things that I planted.

SPEAKER_02 31:32

Oh no!

SPEAKER_01 31:35

It rained, I shit you not, for six fucking days.

SPEAKER_02 31:40

That's crazy. I know. It's been raining here for three.

SPEAKER_01 31:43

Yesterday was the first sun all day day for a week. Yikes. Like there's a lot. There were a couple days in there where the sun came out in the morning or in the afternoon for a few, like a couple hours. Yeah. And then it rained again. Yikes. But yeah, we got like, I don't know, four inches of rain last week. What a look. I know. So yeah, I have major weed control to do.

SPEAKER_02 32:17

Yeah. But we spent like all last weekend doing yard shit. I'm just like, I was tired. I like was actually so glad it rained this entire weekend. Because I was like, I am now under no obligation to do shit outside.

SPEAKER_00 32:34

Nice.

SPEAKER_02 32:35

Because it's raining. I don't have to go pull weeds, I don't have to go fix the mulch or do whatever.

SPEAKER_01 32:41

But you know what I really like doing? And this this does sort of circle back to what we've been talking about is, you know, telling, you know, not giving a fuck what people think. I've when it's not raining for six days straight, I'll like meditate in the middle of my garden. I love that. It is like that sounds so peaceful and grounded. It is very peaceful, and there was just like a different energy there than like meditating. Like meditating in my house is fine. Yeah. But oh, it is a different energy. And it might be because like I've been working, you know, that ground, and I've been putting part of myself into that ground. But like when I've been working in the garden, like the phrase that's been coming to me is reciprocity. Oh, I love that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:40

That's awesome. It's like you're giving to the earth, the earth is giving to you, and it's just like this nice cycle of growth. Yes. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, I love that.

SPEAKER_01 33:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:51

Meditate in your garden, hug your trees. The fucking rules.

SPEAKER_01 33:56

So our garden is we have a double lot, and so the garden is on the side lot, and the neighbor behind us, they have kind of a long drive that goes back to their house. And so I know that they drive by and they see me, and I'm sure they're like, This fucking weirdo is sit just like sitting in her garden again. I don't know. Maybe they are. Or maybe they don't even notice me.

SPEAKER_02 34:24

You blend in with the plants.

SPEAKER_01 34:26

I do. I am. Who is this little boy in the garden?

SPEAKER_02 34:31

Who is this little boy? Oh god. Oh man. Ooh, it's 111. Oh, I was like, wait, no, it's not. It's 1211. It's only magical for you right now. Mm-hmm. Oh my god. Oh, I just put cardigans on. On Five Millennial Witch Starter Pack. I love a cardigan. I love a cardigan. Listen, I still love a cardigan.

SPEAKER_01 35:05

They are so cozy.

SPEAKER_02 35:06

They're the best. Yeah. Oh God. And I know because we talked about this and we texted about it, but the repeating numbers.

SPEAKER_01 35:16

Okay. Okay. I have to say repeating numbers can mean something if you assign meaning to them. So, like when I see 1111, if I decide when I see 1111, it means something, then it means something. Right. But unless you decide it means something, it just means that your brain notices patterns.

SPEAKER_02 35:39

Right. You might want to do an adult autism check. You're very good at pattern recognition.

SPEAKER_01 35:50

Or for example, when I sent the first email application that wasn't actually how to apply for the job, I sent it on May 5th, which was 5.5, and I scheduled it to send at 555. And so when I see 555, I'm like, oh, that's like a little like it's it's it's it's on its way, it's coming to me. Right. But you just because you see weird put I've put meaning to it. Right. Yeah. I get that. Or like if you if you're trying to make a decision about something and you say, okay, universe, send me a sign, and this is the sign. If I see this sign in the next 24 hours, then it's a yes or whatever. Sure. You know? It it like I feel like you have to assign a meaning to something for it to mean something. It's not just like, I saw a rainbow, and I looked it up, and the Google said a rainbow means this. Right.

SPEAKER_02 36:52

And I'll be clearly getting a million dollars

Nostalgia And Finding Your People

SPEAKER_02 36:55

any day now. And it's like, it's not really quite it's so much more intrinsic than that. It's like whatever you think it is. Yes. Yeah. Oh boy. So yeah, millennial witch starter pack, repeating numbers, cardigans, twin flames, love and light only. Oh, I know it hurts. And I feel like like I have been so guilty of so many of the those things.

SPEAKER_01 37:20

But I also wonder, just so okay, so I was listening. I'm sure you know this, I can't think of the artist, but it's we didn't start the fire. Is that Billy Joel? Yes. Okay, but you know the song, right? I do know the song. Okay. And I'm just like, has every generation gone through what millennials have gone through?

SPEAKER_02 37:52

Like, are we not special or are like Do we just think we're special because we were raised in the era of participation trophies?

SPEAKER_01 38:02

I saw a hot take that was okay. It was basically like boomers raising millennials and criticizing millennials for their participation trophies, but they were the adults giving us the participation trophies. So they were basically giving themselves the participation trophies to make up for their inadequate parenting.

SPEAKER_02 38:30

Yep. Fucking love that. Like it's like what's his name on subway takes? Kareem. I don't know that. It it's a social media. And I he I he's great.

SPEAKER_01 38:43

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 38:44

Um, but he does these like hot takes on the subway. Gotcha. Yeah. It's great.

SPEAKER_01 38:49

Wait, is he the guy that like he wears sunglasses and he talks to people in the subway? Yeah. Okay, I think Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:56

And the microphone is like clipped to a subway card.

SPEAKER_01 38:58

Yes. Okay, I've seen it.

SPEAKER_02 38:59

Yeah, like a metro card.

SPEAKER_01 39:00

Yeah. Yeah. There was one where a woman was like, no more bras. Yes!

unknown 39:06

I love that one.

SPEAKER_02 39:07

And all the women on the train are like, yo, fuck bras. Seriously, fuck bras. Seriously, fuck bras.

unknown 39:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:16

Like, can't do anything a tight tank top can't achieve. It's fine. Uh anyway. What else would you put in your starter pack?

SPEAKER_01 39:26

Okay. This is gonna be horrible, but something like a super rare crystal that can only be mined in like a third world country by small children.

SPEAKER_02 39:39

Yes, 100%. And being like, look at this cool crystal, I got it's like, well, buddy. Yeah, you don't want that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:49

Go pick up some quartz outside. Extra double points if it's like moldavite. Oh god, we're gonna burn the house down. I learned moldavite's not a naturally occurring crystal. It's it's from like meteors? Yeah, it's from the meteor, yeah. Which is pretty cool.

SPEAKER_02 40:09

It is pretty cool. Yeah. Yowza. Alright. Do we think it's time for Yeah, I think it's time. You think it's time? I think it's time. Should we do what's bringing us joy? Neva, what's bringing you joy this week?

SPEAKER_01 40:27

Oh man. Okay, I know I say this ever I know we both say this every time, but apart from this. Because schedules being what they are, it's like Oh my god, it's so bad. It's so bad. We're like, well, nothing this month, but hey, we got one in May. We just kneck it in. We got one in May.

unknown 40:49

Yes!

SPEAKER_01 40:49

Just snuck it in. Yeah. Oh man. Okay, here's what's bringing me joy. I am working with a business coach who is also witchy spiritually inclined, and she she's just like super nice and super sweet. And she's been helping me plan this seven-day challenge for creative people. And what? I said I'm on board. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 41:29

I will be a bitty pig all the time.

SPEAKER_01 41:33

And it has forced me to stretch and grow in a way that I wasn't really anticipating, but has been like really good for me. And I also really like her because I definitely feel like I'm not gonna be like reliant on her forever. You know? I definitely feel like she's like kind of building a foundation and supporting me so that I can't eventually fly the nest.

SPEAKER_02 42:06

Yeah, oh my god, I was thinking of that like euphemism. It's like building systems and yeah support.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

So that that's what's bringing me joy. And it's like about like I've been like putting out teasers on my social media, and it's almost it's about ready for me to be like, hey, I'm doing this thing. I love it. So, you know, follow me on social media for more info on the thing.

SPEAKER_02 42:29

Absolutely, and you all should. Especially if you do anything creative, businessy based at all.

SPEAKER_01 42:35

Or even just not business-y based.

SPEAKER_02 42:37

Or even not, yeah, just creative.

SPEAKER_01 42:39

Because like times are what they are, and we need some sort of way to like transmute the rage.

SPEAKER_02 42:48

Tell me about it.

SPEAKER_01 42:51

Look at me bringing it full circle.

SPEAKER_02 42:53

Oh my god, you're so good. For real.

SPEAKER_01 42:57

Maria, what's bringing you joy?

SPEAKER_02 42:59

Okay. Oh my god, so many things have happened between our last episode and this episode.

SPEAKER_01 43:04

I don't even remember when our last episode was.

SPEAKER_02 43:06

Who remembers anything anymore? What is bringing me joy? Okay. Oh god. It's so many things. It's like it's so many things, which is a good problem to have. But I think the thing that's just like this weekend bringing me the most joy is that it's raining

Garden Grounding And Personal Signs

SPEAKER_02 43:35

and that I got to take a nap yesterday.

SPEAKER_01 43:38

I took a nap yesterday too. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 43:40

It was so good. It was such a good nap. But honestly, the thing that like brought me the most joy was I got to stay up late with my son, who's 13, and we watched bad movies. Not bad movies, we watched John Wick, two and three. Like late into the night while we made like like snacks, and it was an activity that like I used to do with my dad. Like we would stay up late and watch like B movies, like really terrible movies, and we would make like fried egg sandwiches. And it was the thing that him and I shared that was really special. And I've been now getting to do that with him, and it just feels like so wholesome. And I know it brought me so much immense joy, and it was like such a good bonding experience for the both of us. Not that like I'm not close with both of my children, I am. But it was just like a really special thing to to share while we watched movies full of gratuitous violence, which was awesome.

SPEAKER_01 44:42

So and Keanu Reeves. And Keanu Reeves, world's kindest man. So Keanu Reeves, if you're listening.

SPEAKER_02 44:49

Excellent example. Just just love that dude.

SPEAKER_01 44:52

What would Keanu Reeves do?

SPEAKER_02 44:54

Seriously, what would Kiana Reeves do? Probably donate everything to charity because that's what he does. Because he's a fucking OG. Love him. Be excellent to each other. I'm trying, man. Alright.

SPEAKER_01 45:10

Some people make it difficult, but I'm trying.

SPEAKER_02 45:12

Some people make it so difficult. Alright. Shall I pull a card? Yes, please. Okay. I have this cute, it's like a mini deck. It's called Enchanting Realms, and it's only made the major arcana. Oh, okay. Yeah, but I love the artwork. It's like so beautiful. And the Illustrator, like obviously, no AI because fuck AI. Yep.

SPEAKER_01 45:37

Well, fuck Gen AI. Yes. Yeah. There is a different rent.

SPEAKER_02 45:43

Yes, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 45:44

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_02 45:45

So I pulled the fool. Oh. Yeah, I know. And on this card, he looks like one of the barred guys from El Dorado. Yes. Love that. He's like a little jester-looking dude with a loot and some pantaloons. And like he's gonna f he's about he's about to walk off like a broken branch. Because, you know, the fool be foolin'. The fool be foolin'. The fool be foolin'. But I like the idea that we're just, you know, at the beginning of something great. And maybe we are. Yeah. And also, you know, pretty great for being a month out from the solstice. Yeah. But ish.

SPEAKER_01 46:28

It it's wild to me that you still have school for a month because all of our schools are out. I know. Like Memorial Day is the unofficial start for summer here.

SPEAKER_02 46:38

That's crazy. Yep, nope. I have an uh the whole last month. My last day is June 23rd. I know. It's sickening. Don't do you guys go back earlier? Like mid-August. Okay. So we go back the same time. I fucking hate everything. Whatever, man. Jeez. Oh my god. We go back August 20th.

SPEAKER_01 47:04

I know. Everything's going to be a good thing. I mean, that's like that's like a week later than like a maybe a week. That's okay. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 47:14

Still though, I know. It's wild.

SPEAKER_01 47:17

Anyway. Well, this was fun.

SPEAKER_02 47:20

This was fun, and it's always a pleasure to see your face and hear your voice and do fun things. Yes.

Joys Of The Week And Closing

SPEAKER_02 47:25

But hopefully people listen to our podcast and share and download, and hopefully we're still killing it in Germany. Thanks, Germans. Whoop whoop. We love you. Yeah. Seriously. Oh, that's great. We are we are so popular in one town in Germany. I love looking at our stats. That's so funny. So let's hear it for Germans. What's up, Germans? Yep. Donka Shen. Um we're killing it. We're gonna have to come up with some sign-offs, like for real in Germany.

SPEAKER_01 48:01

I I did do German Duolingo for like two years, and then I was like, well, Duolingo's stupid, and now I'm not doing it anymore.

SPEAKER_02 48:10

And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 48:11

I feel like I've lost anything that I might have learned. But then I also was actually doing some research and like Duolingo doesn't really teach you shit.

SPEAKER_02 48:20

No, it is not an effective language learning thing. You're better off like what I have found very helpful is those like parallel books where you buy a book that's like the text is on one side in the language and on one side in English.

SPEAKER_01 48:33

Oh, that's cool.

SPEAKER_02 48:35

It's crazy helpful because then you like like force yourself to read through the side that's in the language you want to learn and then just compare across, but you're getting like grammar and context and syntax all at once.

SPEAKER_01 48:47

Um I'd considered like downloading or borrowing, you know, from the library, like you know, ebook, like kids' books. Kids in other languages, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 49:05

Well, bye friends. Bye, friends. Thanks for listening. Share and leave it on for your dogs at home. Okay. Bye, everybody.