Hiss & Tell: Cat Behavior and Beyond

AMA: Your Cat Behavior Questions Answered!

• Kristiina Wilson • Season 2 • Episode 24

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Ever wondered how to help your feline friends live their best lives? Get ready to unravel the mysteries of cat behavior with us on Hiss and Tell as Kristiina Wilson teams up with journalist and documentarian David Farrier for an engaging AMA episode. From handling intercat aggression to counter-surfing deterrents, we tackle questions sourced from David's vibrant Webworm community, sharing our expertise alongside anecdotes from David's documentary adventures, including a playful detour into the world of cat shows with his family's Birman cat.

Our conversation dives into practical solutions for common feline behavioral challenges. Whether you're grappling with a solo cat's play aggression or trying to keep your furry friend off the counters, we offer insights into using positive reinforcement, high-value treats, and understanding natural hunting instincts. We also discuss strategies to improve relationships with resident cats that feel threatened by newcomers and explore the benefits of adopting kittens in pairs to support their social development. This episode is packed with actionable advice designed to enrich the lives of both cats and their humans.

Rounding off the episode, we delve into the nuances of territorial spraying and instinctual actions around food, water, and litter boxes. From managing territorial instincts with innovative solutions like motion-activated sprinklers to detailed tips for grooming and maintaining hygiene, our conversation is a heartfelt celebration of the Webworm community. Join us as we connect over our shared love for cats and other creatures, leaving you with a new appreciation for the interconnectedness of all animals.

Kristiina Wilson:

Hi and welcome to Hiss and Tell a Cat Behavior and More podcast hosted by me, Kristiina Wilson, animal Behaviorist. Today's episode is an Ask Me Anything episode featuring questions from journalist and documentarian David Farrier's webworm community. I'll be answering questions about intercat and human aggression. If you can keep cats off counters, toileting, cat sex, kittens, food behaviors and a lot more, so let's get right into it.

Kristiina Wilson:

Hi and Hiss and Tell to . I am your host, Kristiina Wilson, and with me today is journalist and documentarian David Farrier. Welcome, david, hi. Thanks for having me, thanks for joining me. So today's episode is our seasonal AMA, and David is actually here because I got so many great cat behavior questions from people in the super cool community that he has built, which is called WebWorm. So, right before I get to those questions, I want to let David tell you guys a little bit about who he is and what he does, and then we'll jump into the AMA where you guys can hear the answers to all the amazing questions. So do you want to tell everybody a little bit about exactly what it is you do, what Webworm is?

David Farrier:

Yeah, yeah, I mean, primarily I'm a journalist and documentary maker, as you mentioned, and back a long time ago now what feels like a long time ago during the pandemic, I was working on a documentary but in lockdown in New Zealand and I started a newsletter called Webworm, which is basically me just doing my thing, which is kind of going down sort of weird rabbit holes and investigating weird Internet things, and that newsletter has been going for four years now and this really was unexpected. But this really neat community has built up around it and I guess there are people that are drawn into the stuff I like, which is things like weird internet mysteries and documentary music and cats we all seem to really like cats and so you know, when you came along I think there was you noticed that and there was a response and the cat fans of Webworm came out in droves.

Kristiina Wilson:

Yeah, which I always love to see, and I was so happy to be able to talk to people more about cats Cause I don't do that enough since it's my job, but it was. It was really nice to be able to connect with people about that and over all these other issues. I think it's such a great community. So much like I am not a joiner, but my wife is always like what are you doing? You're like talking to people and like you're in this like weird community, like what she just thinks. It's so weird get off.

David Farrier:

Yeah, don't talk to people on the internet. What are you doing?

Kristiina Wilson:

it's just very not like me. So she's even last night. She's like you're doing what you're talking, that guy whose community you're in like no, it's this weird thing honestly.

David Farrier:

I mean, I like to say it's the most polite, funny comment section on the internet and you know I send out a couple of newsletters every week and you know people comment on them and it turns into you know, there's multiple threads running underneath and it just you know most internet communities, multiple threads running underneath and it just you know most internet communities eventually descend into chaos and eventually ends with like someone calling someone else a Nazi and that just never happens. They're wonderful people and you know I've built friendships through this community. I do little pop-ups here and there. I'm going to Australia in a couple of days to do some pop-ups there and I love meeting people and it's yeah, it's the best place.

Kristiina Wilson:

I love webworm yeah, I, I agree, and I also just want to shout out your films. Tickled is how I came to know you, which I want to go see in the theater, um, and then Mr Organ is another great film, um, and so I would advise everyone to go and check those out if they can and there's also so much other animal chat in the webworm community.

Kristiina Wilson:

There's chat about possums and raccoons and, like you know, everyone posts their favorite animal of the week or all that kind of stuff. So there's it's not just cat stuff, although people who are listening to this are obviously cat motivated, so I don't know why I'm being like this, but I feel like cat people, cat people and other creatures as well, and I think that's why you know I'm, I'm.

David Farrier:

I saw my first skunk last night, and so I'm thinking of pivoting to some more skunk related content.

Kristiina Wilson:

Oh, you should. You should do a skunk episode. We have a beautiful skunk that comes by. You know, we live in the forest now, and so I have cameras all around our property, because I'm insane and I like to.

David Farrier:

You know, just spy on the wildlife. You want to see what's going on, yeah, exactly.

Kristiina Wilson:

And so the skunk came by and it likes to eat the cat food that I leave out for the raccoons and the feral cats. It's so cute and it's got this really cute tail and a big like on its head, so I'm getting.

David Farrier:

They're all essentially cats. You know skunks opossums, raccoons, they're all just cats.

Kristiina Wilson:

Yes, cats, yes, they, they are. And to that, and I'm getting my rehabbers license so I can start working with them more, so it's gonna be fun. Do you have any fun cat stories that you would like to share with our listeners, or perhaps one fun cat story?

David Farrier:

I think probably the thing that I that probably got me into cats is that when I was a kid um and this is I'm not not necessarily promoting this kind of behavior, but our family showed cats in cat shows.

Kristiina Wilson:

So in New.

David Farrier:

Zealand, we had a Burman cat, which is a very fancy cat, and I always sort of say, like if you're going to get a cat, you don't need to get a fancy cat.

David Farrier:

Please just go to your local rescue but we had a little Burman creature and as a 13-year-old I would go to cat shows around new zealand and show this cat. It was probably the least cool thing I could do, but I'm I almost got best in show one year. I've still got some of the ribbons. I don't have them with me here right now. Uh, but that was um, just a very we. I was a cat crazy kid and um chan labing that was his name, friends was big at the time. Uh, wonderful cat, wonderful companion. And yeah, I met a lot of freaky people in the cat showing community in new zealand, and you do, and you know. One of the first things I did when I came to los angeles was I went to a local cat show here which was so much bigger than anything we ever had in new zealand and again, the people, cat people and cat people that show cats they're a very specific kind of person and I love them to bits.

Kristiina Wilson:

Yes, it's a very intense. I've never been to an American one. I've been to them in Finland and they're very, very intense over there as well. I think just because our people are also just extra intense anyway, and then you stick that together. I was like whoa, okay, yes, um, but always, always interesting, I think um. So how can people find you and your work? You also have a podcast, so I want to share that with everyone.

David Farrier:

The podcast is amazing the best way to find me. I do two main things. I write webworm, which is just an internet address. You can go to it's wwwwebwormco because I couldn't afford the com, and you can subscribe for free. All my public interest journalism is entirely free, so I really love people to join in there. And I do a weekly podcast about sort of me being stuck in America called Flightless Bird. It's a metaphor because all our birds in New Zealand a lot of them are flightless and I'm sort of a metaphorical flightless bird trapped in America. And if you just search for Flightless Bird on any podcast platform we've just launched on YouTube, you can find the show there.

Kristiina Wilson:

All right, amazing. So thank you so much for sharing with our listeners and everyone. Be sure to follow David on all his various platforms and the AMA will start now and welcome back to the AMA portion of today's episode of His Intel. With me is my beautiful spouse, Ally Wells, who will be reading the questions. Welcome, Ally Wells, thank you.

Ally Wells:

I appreciate being here in our house.

Kristiina Wilson:

I just thought I'd be weird. Successful Thank you, successful thing, thank you. So, um, as discussed um with david, I asked members of his community, webworm um, to give me questions for today's ama, and ally is going to be reading off the questions and then I shall uh answer them. So here, here we go. I don't know what's wrong with me today. I'm sorry, I don't know either. Anywho, okay, you ready?

Ally Wells:

yes, is it reasonable to train cats to stay off of counters completely, or is that a pipe dream, unless you're willing to apply an aversive stimulus, which I am not um, it's pretty much a pipe dream to get them to stay off counters completely.

Kristiina Wilson:

You can absolutely train them to stay off counters while you are around and you can do that by training them to have a go-to space, which you can do via clicker training or go to spot, and for that I always recommend my amazing colleague at catschoolco who does full tutorials on how to click or train your cat, and I believe one of those tutorials is about teaching how to do training to a go-to spot.

Kristiina Wilson:

So in this instance I would pick something high, because cats really like to be high, which is why they're on your counters. Give them like a tall cat tree or a shelf and train them to go there when you're going to be cooking or doing things in the kitchen that your cat is normally on the counters for, and that should help you for that specific issue. However, keeping them off the counters all the time, I think it's not really possible, because cats are going to do what they want to do while you're not in the room or when you're asleep. And also, I am also strictly anti-aversives, which don't work on cats anyway. So you should never use any aversives like spray bottles, shouting, punishing, yelling no at your cats. None of those things work on cats, because you're actually giving them your attention, which is what they want the most anyway. So that is the answer to that question.

Ally Wells:

I had to move myself with my two cats to my parents' place and it's been six months now and Tilly, my mom's two-year-old cat, is still upset at me for bringing the others. She's slowly getting used to them and they're kept separate during the day when we're not home and have supervised time together. In the evenings we use away friends and that's helping a lot. But she has a personal grudge against me. Really, as she knows their presence is my fault. How do I win her over? She'll happily take treats from me, but I'll often get hissed at if I attempt to pat her, although she's totally fine with mom or dad doing the same. I've tried to take it slowly with her, but it's been far longer than I anticipated for her to still be offended.

Ally Wells:

I love the idea of a cat being offended um, yeah she has definitely made a lot of progress, but still not there. What do you reckon?

Kristiina Wilson:

so off the top. I just want to stress that cats don't hold grudges and they're not spiteful, even though I think that's something that's really like out there in the lore is that cats are these like very spiteful creatures, and they're not. They're not holding grudges, they're not being spiteful. She may just still have some you know, residual anxiety is what I would say around all of this, and I would recommend using a high value reinforcer, which is a treat that she only gets when she's working with you, something like a churu, freeze dried chicken, tuna, those freeze dried minnows that are very disgusting but cats seem to really like. Yeah, look at that face. Allie loves the freeze dried minnows. And then you can start to form a positive association with her when she is around you and let her come to you. Don't go to her and try to pat her. Let her come to you, make it all her choice.

Kristiina Wilson:

Everything with cats should always be their choice, or at least have the illusion of it being their choice, and so you may just have to work on her timetable. I would also say that if this goes on for a really, really long time and she seems very, very stressed, that you might want to speak with your vet about a short course of fluoxetine, which is cat Prozac, to help her get through the stressful period. And if you do do that, make sure that you get it compounded as a transdermal ointment versus pills, because again, I know that I say this a lot, but the idea of chasing around a cat to pill them, to give them anti-anxiety medication is just antithetical. It does not make any sense. So I would also add intellectual stimulation bird feeders, outside puzzle toys, enrichment boxes, other stuff, so that her mind is busy.

Ally Wells:

How do I stop my cat from attacking my legs, stalking me in the evenings after she's been fed? She loves me the most, but also attacks me the most in the household.

Kristiina Wilson:

So this is actually very common, and I I have had a lot of clients recently with this issue. It's hard for me to say for sure what this is without seeing a video of it, but generally this is play aggression, right. So it generally happens when households have solo cats and the cats are bored, and especially in the evenings or in the early mornings when they would normally be out hunting. Cats are crepuscular, which means that they are most active at dawn and dusk, and so I'm guessing that in the evenings, after she's been fed, this is hitting her time to hunt. You can fix this in either of two ways. You can play with her to exhaustion, just generally for about 20 minutes, until she cannot play anymore, about twice a day, maybe before dinner or right after, so that she doesn't need to solicit this play. And the other way to stop this is by totally ignoring it.

Kristiina Wilson:

So cats do not respond, like I just said, to correction or negative reinforcement, so you have to ignore the behaviors that you don't want.

Kristiina Wilson:

So while you're ignoring this, you need to wear heavy pants and heavy shoes and don't look at her, don't, you know, say anything if she's going after your legs as you're walking around, and after about two weeks she should stop when she realizes she's not getting any attention from you, which is really what she wants. That should stop the behavior. That said, before it stops it will probably get a little bit worse in what's called an extinction burst. So if you imagine, like a kid trying to get their mom's attention on the phone and they'd first start out being like mom, mom, mom, mom, mom and get really loud right before they stop, that's an extinction burst and so she may get a little bit worse right before she stops Again. This is another case where I would say add intellectual stimulation, add cat specific toys, add puzzle feeders, food puzzles, bird feeders, so she has something that is species appropriate to watch. I love suction cup bird feeders for windows, you know. Add enrichment boxes, everything you can to amuse her, so she stops going after you.

Ally Wells:

Okay my neutered indoor outdoor cat seems to take issue with me sometimes and sprays a flat surface like a wall or door right in front of me. He was neutered at an older age due to being a rescue, but was likely still under one and having to manage New Zealand's COVID restrictions. I guess is why there was a delay, but I can't see any pattern of the behavior and I haven't smelled any unknown spray spots.

Kristiina Wilson:

Okay. So when you can't see a pattern in the behavior. I really love collecting data, so I would really recommend keeping a log of these incidents and just write down the date, the time, the location that this happened, what was happening right before and what happened right after and see if, after you've built up like a decent data set, if you see a through line for any of these incidents like oh, it happens right after I get home, or oh, it tends to happen at 4 pm, or oh, it always happens in this room, or, you know, is there something that ties all of these incidents together and sometimes we don't notice what that is until we have like a decent amount of those incidents together, you know, on a piece of paper for us to actually look at. So I would do that number one. I would also ask how are you cleaning up the areas? Are you using a good enzymatic cleaner I like the Nature's Miracle Advance for Cats and a blacklight flashlight to make sure that you're getting all of the spots? It's really important to use both of those things, because if you don't really clean up all of the spots, then he will continue to smell urine. If you don't break up those spots with enzymatic cleaner. He'll continue to smell the urine and continue to toilet there because it just it smells like a litter box. So you need to make sure that you get rid of all of those spots. And then the third thing is I would say what can your cat see outside of the windows from your home? Does he see any other cats coming by? Are there strays? Are there ferals? Are there other people's house cats that are coming onto your property? Are there?

Kristiina Wilson:

I don't know exactly what native wildlife you have in New Zealand. I know that you guys have different possums than we do, but are there possums? Like what? What's going on? Are there raccoons? I don't know if you guys have raccoons, but sometimes especially male cats get very territorial and if they see other wildlife on what they perceive as their property, especially another cat, especially another male cat, they will start spraying.

Kristiina Wilson:

So and he may be spraying to tell you like hey, you know, I'm seeing this go on. So I would definitely check to see if there's any other animals wandering around on your property and if you need to maybe put a little motion sensor camera out there to see if there's any other animals wandering around on your property and if you need to maybe put a little motion sensor camera out there to see if there's anybody there. If there is, you can put up like window blocking transparent or translucent stickers so that it kind of blurs things, or like a window film so that you still get light in but he can't exactly see who's outside. And I would recommend also maybe using a motion-activated sprinkler to kind of ask the random creatures to move along and not be right next to your windows. So that would be my advice for that situation.

Ally Wells:

Okay, my cats love covering things up by lightly pawing around their food wet and dry and water. Usually there's nothing for them to cover their food or water with, so they just kind of end up doing a silly little dance for a few seconds before or after they eat. They also have a hard time burying their waste and end up scratching the sides and entrance of their litter box rather than the litter itself. Is there something I should do differently or a tool I should provide them so they don't feel like they need to cover their food and water, or is it otherwise harmless behavior? They're both long-haired cats which I've read may have something to do with the litter box scratching. Yes, okay.

Kristiina Wilson:

So trying to cover their food and moving the water around are very normal cat behaviors. They're instinctual cat behaviors that come from living outside in nature and they don't really trust the water that they would find in nature. It would normally be covered in leaves and pine needles and dead bugs and gross stuff. So the reason they stick their paw in there and move it around is because they have an instinct to move the water before they drink from it. So they're clearing the surface of the debris. So that's why they do that. We have several cats who do that in our household. For some of them we've had to put like little rubber mats under the water dishes just because otherwise they would warp the wooden floors that we have. So you might consider putting down like a little, a little mat of some kind around the water bowl if that's an issue. And for the food, what they would do in nature is if they have food left over that they've killed and they are not hungry anymore, is they would cache it right. So they would cover it up with leaves or dirt, hide it so that they can come back and get it later. So that's what your cat is doing when they're done eating. They have again that instinct to cover and cache their food and come back to it later. We have several cats again that do this in our house, and I always just think it's funny and pretend that they're helping to clean up, even though that's not really what they're doing at all. But that's just something that you really can't change, that behavior. If they have it, it's an instinct and they can't do anything about it.

Kristiina Wilson:

So, regarding the litter boxes, that's a totally different behavior. When you see them scratching around outside, that generally means the litter box is not big enough for them, and so, especially when you have long haired cats even if the cat themselves is not that big because they have long hair they need an extra, extra big box. And that is just because, for them to toilet comfortably, they want to make sure that they're not going to get dirty, and you know that cats are fastidiously clean animals. They want to maintain their what I call fresh and sexiness at all times Fresh and sexy, fresh and sexy. And so they really want to make sure that when they go to the bathroom they're not going to get anything on their fur, and so, especially for long-haired cats, this is difficult if they don't have a really big litter box.

Kristiina Wilson:

So what I would recommend, and what I've done in the past for large and long-haired cats, is to take like a really big plastic tub or like a tote and cut a side out, and then you have to sometimes like file down any sharp edges if you need to, or put like little pool noodles inside the edges just to soften it and use that as a litter box instead. Make sure you don't have a top on it at all, and then that's really good to use for a long haired cat and gives them enough space, because sometimes a commercial box is just not big enough, especially for a long haired cat. So that is what I would recommend.

Kristiina Wilson:

It's probably a better use of pool noodles than them in the pool yes, just to answer that, like last little bit, I don't think that you need to trim the fur on their paw pads. I don't think that that would be necessary. A shame you know, so I love the long hair yeah, I don't think that's necessary, unless they're for some reason, like having diarrhea and they're getting really dirty. Other than that, like cats are very good at maintaining their own cleanliness, and so I don't think it's like a paw pad for issue.

Ally Wells:

I have a question about my senior ish we think roughly 12 to 13 years old rescue cat. She's always been a cautious, skittish girl but the past year, few years, with us having to move in with family for a bit and then back into our own space, she's become so scared of everything and everyone. I rescued her when she was about six months old and was told she wasn't in the best household situation prior, but no further details. She's fine, just around me and over the years her safe person circle has expanded to include my human kid and a couple of friends who are around often. But if there's anyone new or with a loud voice or who moves too quickly around, she runs and hides.

Ally Wells:

She jumps at every sound and will run and hide if she hears anyone outside at our front door while I'm at work she spends the day curled up under the blankets in my bed, which is a vast improvement from, I guess, 20 plus hours a day hiding under the blankets in my bed, which is a vast improvement from, I guess, 20 plus hours a day hiding under the blankets. So I'd love for her to feel less anxious and more confident in general so she doesn't feel like she has to hide, like if I'm home and hanging out with her in the living room and my kid comes in the house with their friends laughing and talking. I'd love her to feel confident and safe enough to stay with me rather than panicking and immediately running upstairs to hide. Any suggestions for helping with that?

Kristiina Wilson:

So moving is super, super stressful on cats. They're super tied to their home environment and the scent markers that they leave there, and then that alone can push them above a manageable threshold and then some other cats are just super anxious. So I think maybe what's going on with your cat is a bit from both sides. So I would try adding what I've already talked about for multiple questions here Add intellectual stimulation, which is like clicker training, adding bird feeders, adding puzzle feeders, extra play, enrichment boxes. I would also try playing cat music, which is music that was composed by this amazing scientist named David. I don't even know how to pronounce his last name, it's t-e-i-e. It's just at musicforcatscom. You can stream it for free. It sounds just like nice classical music, but it has a lot of like clicks and purrs and stuff in it. Whenever we put it on we just fall asleep. It's really relaxing for cats and we actually use it a lot in shelter work. So I would try that. I would definitely add Feelyway plug-in pheromone diffusers, if you haven't tried that already, and I would maybe consider a well-sourced CBD but the gold standard and I think especially for this kind of I don't want to say extreme case, but pretty severe case of anxiety. You know where someone is hiding a lot and they really get freaked out by sounds and other people coming over. That's not the best quality of life that we would hope for our pets is that I would talk to your veterinarian again about getting them on that medication called fluoxetine, which is Prozac for cats. We have several of our cats on it.

Kristiina Wilson:

I was really reluctant to put them on that medication called fluoxetine, which is Prozac for cats. We have several of our cats on it. I was really reluctant to put them on it a year and a half ago when our cat, steve, passed and they started having aggression and anxiety issues and I kind of fought it for a long time and then I finally did and it was so helpful and it has been so helpful that I really think when you're in the middle of one of these cases where somebody is super anxious, it's definitely a really big tool in your toolbox. Again, I would ask your vet to have it compounded as a transdermal ointment so that you can just put it on your finger and put it in her ear and you're not causing her additional anxiety by trying to pill her. But I think that could be really really helpful to get her below threshold. Where then the behavioral interventions, like adding intellectual stimulation and, you know, adding puzzle feeders and giving her more playtime, and all of that would actually be effective?

Kristiina Wilson:

Okay, sorry, was that too long? No, not at all, okay.

Ally Wells:

Okay. So my favorite cat Loki, who's almost 15, suddenly started peeing on the bed as soon as I get up in the morning. Morning he just pees on my pillow. That happened twice now and yesterday he peed on top of the cat litter bag, sitting next to the litter box, not spraying a whole bladder full. No blood and pee, no other behavioral changes. He's eating like the greedy guts he is. Is that like a New Zealand thing?

Kristiina Wilson:

I don't know.

Ally Wells:

Greedy guts. We're taking him into the vet in case it's crystals. But could such a sudden behavior change be something else? No major stress or changes of the household, except our youngest cat has gone missing for six days longest ever, and they're great friends. Buddy doesn't seem to be looking for her, or anything. Cat troubles oh, your poor, and they're great friends. But he doesn't seem to be looking for her, or anything cat troubles oh, your poor guy.

Kristiina Wilson:

Um, I definitely think a full vet checkup with the urine culture is is needed here. But don't discount the stress that he's feeling from his best friend being missing. Cats don't necessarily present stress the way, certainly the way that we do as humans, and they are masters at not only hiding pain but hiding stress, right. Because we have to remember that not only are they predators, they're also prey. So that makes them have to be doubly sneaky I don't want to say sneaky doubly good at hiding exactly what they're feeling, right. And stress is one of the biggest drivers of inappropriate urination in cats. So I really would not discount the fact that his friend has been gone for so long and hopefully his friend has come back by now. Again, I would also ask can he see other rival cats outside? Because, like I already answered the other question, male cats might also mark if they see other cats in their territory. So that's what I would say, but definitely the vet visit is the most important thing here.

Ally Wells:

Okay. Next is we rescued a six-month old stray about a year ago. We kept him indoors for about eight weeks before letting him come and go during the day, but ensuring he stays inside overnight. He settled in really well and formed close attachments to us, but it seems he only uses the indoor litter box for toileting. We'd hoped that during the day he would go outside when he's out and about, but he will come indoors specifically to use the toilet. It's not a huge issue, except I hadn't anticipated having to clean an indoor litter box for full-time use after a year. Is there anything we can do to encourage him to go toilet outside, or is this just what we have to deal with?

Kristiina Wilson:

This is just what you have to deal with. Yeah, that's, that's really all I can say about that. I would also ask is he safe outside unsupervised, like, do you live in an area that doesn't have a lot of traffic and doesn't have any predators? I know where we live. It's not safe for cats to be outside because we have bears and bobcats and coyotes and lots of traffic. But I will say, if you hate cleaning litter boxes, I mean who does not? I don't think anyone loves it. Litter robots are very expensive, but they're very, very, very well worth it. It really is a life and game changer, and you can buy them refurbished so you don't have to buy a brand new one. I do believe that they sell refurbished ones for significantly less than a brand new one. So I would look into that. Um, yeah, and also just take care of your cat's safety going, going outside. Maybe at least put a tracker on on him along the lines of cat breeding.

Ally Wells:

I've always wondered if male cats know what to do after being neutered. Is that a dumb question? Uh, I only asked because my cat Winnie has yet to be spayed. She's always horned up around my cat Bosco, who's neutered. She'll strut her stuff around him, and sometimes he'll mount her, bite her by the scruff and do a weird dance with his hind legs. He's nowhere near where he needs to be, though. Is this a common thing? Yes, they can't, they okay? Uh, he kind of dances for a few seconds and leaves her unfulfilled oh, we've seen this a lot in our house.

Kristiina Wilson:

We've seen this. We've seen this a lot. Yeah, it is uh not uncommon. Yes, cats know what to do. They absolutely still have sexual impulses, um, even after spade, after they are spayed and neutered. In fact, um steve had uh very strong sexual impulses after you know, for his whole life and, would you know, blow himself all the time. Uh, lovely, but it's true and so.

Kristiina Wilson:

But there are also a lot of cats who just kind of don't know. They know they're supposed to be doing something, but they don't. Like you said, they kind of get what they're supposed to be doing, but not exactly what to do. So it's just very normal and honestly, you should be glad maybe that he's missing the mark, because cat sex is very, very, very painful for the female. Male cats have a barbed penis so that when they withdraw, the barbs actually go in the opposite way, so that the withdrawal is what's very painful, and the pain of that is what starts ovulation in the female cat, which is a horrible. Yeah, I know, I didn't know that. Yes, that is what does it and um, it is. It's a terrible system. It is terrible for female cats. So your cat is not missing anything. Hopefully her appointment is soon, because too many heat cycles can lead to pyometra, which is a severe infection of the uterus, and that can be extremely deadly. So that is my answer to that question.

Ally Wells:

Everyone spay and neuter their pets, our indoor-outdoor cat lost her most recent collar in about two weeks. The one before lasted several months, so it might just be luck. Is there anything that can help encourage her to keep it on or otherwise prolong the collar's use? She does seem fine with it, and we only get collars that'll snap apart if she gets caught on anything. But just in case you had any tips.

Kristiina Wilson:

So you're absolutely right to be using breakaway collars. It's really unsafe for people to use collars that are not breakaway not to be a super downer, but collars that aren't breakaway can really lead to a lot of strangulation of pets. So please, please, please, make sure that your pets are wearing breakaway collars. That said, there are collars that are breakaway that have a stronger like poundage right Like you can set the tension.

Kristiina Wilson:

Yeah, you can set the tension of them so that they don't break away as lightly, but they still break away when there's enough force applied, right. So the ones that we got for this issue, because we have a couple of cats that learned how to just stick their paw up under the collar and just like fling it off, which was not great. So we got the brand is called Rogz Rogz, it's R-O-G-Z, and those are the ones where you can set the tension and they seem to just be a little bit stronger and those haven't come off. So I would recommend looking for those or similar ones where you can set the tension, and I can assure you that I don't.

Ally Wells:

I'm pretty sure there aren't any similar ones, because it took hours of research for me to find those. Okay, so, it really is the best. I'm adopting a four week old kitten. The litter was abandoned. I'm open to any and all tips of care for such a young kitten.

Kristiina Wilson:

Okay so, there's a lot more than I could really answer in like a quick AMA here, but four weeks is super, super young, so I would really. The first thing I would say is please adopt one of its siblings also, or another kitten of a similar age. If you adopt such a young kitten and it doesn't have any conspecifics, it is very, very likely to end up having what is called singleton syndrome, because it doesn't go through its socialization period with not only its mother but its siblings, where it learns to bite with an appropriate force and use its claws appropriately and play with appropriate force, and then just also it's going to learn cat social dynamics and the way that cats use their voices and body postures. And if he or she does not have anyone else to learn this stuff with and anyone to model this stuff from, they may end up being quite socially weird.

Kristiina Wilson:

We have a cat like that in our house. Her name is Babby and we raised her from just a few days old. She was found on the streets in Brooklyn and you know she couldn't be exposed to the rest of our cats until she was old enough to have her vaccinations and because of that she is very special. Let's put it that way. She hisses a lot, she gets really mad at other cats, she slaps a lot.

Kristiina Wilson:

And I think a lot of that is also just her not quite knowing how to be a cat. She just didn't have those lessons and we couldn't teach her. So I would really really say please, please, please, try to adopt a pair, because it's quite a lot to handle otherwise and in fact a lot of people end up putting down singleton kittens or returning them to shelters because it ends up being so much work which I, you know, do not advocate for. So I really hope that you can add another kitten to your family. That said, you're going to need to get some KMR, which is kitten milk replacer, and bottles, because a four week old will still need that nourishment. You're going to need to get all different kinds of toys. You're going to need to help this kitten toilet. You're going to need to get kitten safe litter, so not anything that's clumping. There's so much stuff to do that I think that would be its whole own episode. That actually is maybe a good idea and something that I'll cover with my best buddy, dr Gina Rendon.

Ally Wells:

We got two sibling rescue kittens who are now nearly two years old, one male and one female indoor outdoor cats. The male constantly terrorizes the smaller female to the point where she started going to the toilet inside because she's too terrified to go outside. She's going outside again now most of the time and not quite so terrified, but the male continues to stalk and chase and pounce on her every single day. Anything we can do like feed them separately. She's found a place under an ottoman she can hide in. She sticks close by us when we're home.

Kristiina Wilson:

Any tips are appreciated so the first thing I would say is get those the feely way optimum going in your house, the feely way plugins. They are pheromone diffusers and the optimum uses two separate synthetic pheromones. The first one is the bunting pheromone. So that is when cats walk around the house and rub their faces against like corners or the wall or you, and that is saying like this is my territory, this is my home, this is where I feel safe. And the second pheromone that is in there is the nursing mother's pheromone, and and that one says, hey, we're all part of the same family and we all get along. So it definitely install those in your home. I recommend one per 500 square feet or floor of a home or a room with a door that is shut all the time. I would also say and this is going to sound really stupid is put a collar with a bell on him. It sounds really dumb, but it goes a really really long way into stopping this kind of thing.

Kristiina Wilson:

Because, like we've talked about, cats are hunters but they're also prey and so often if they get into this kind of behavioral loop and they're so apt to get into behavioral loops because they're all a little bit OCD when they're making noise. It's not fun for them anymore to attack each other because you've kind of blown up their spot right, they can't be sneaky, they can't sneak up on each other. And then also the cat who's been acting like prey because they've been in this loop of like oh no, he's attacking me. And so they start kind of having prey behaviors, which is moving quickly, moving in kind of this like disjointed way, like not with smooth movements that would activate the other cat to attack them. So if they can hear where that other cat is, they're less likely to move around like their prey and that's going to stop that predator prey cycle that's happening.

Kristiina Wilson:

So I would definitely add the feely way and I would definitely put a collar with a bell on him so that she doesn't have to worry about where he is. I would also make sure that your litter boxes are not covered and that they have several exit routes so that he can't bully her in the litter box. Which often goes on in these cases is that like the bully will stand outside of the litter box and kind of corner their prey. They kind of just corner them in the litter box and wait because they're stuck in there. So make sure the litter box is set up so that that can't happen. And that is my answer to that question.

Kristiina Wilson:

And that's that is the last question for this webworm AMA, and so I want to thank all of you guys in the webworm community for sharing your cat stories and photos of your cats, which I always love to see, and submitting all of these great questions. Thanks again to my beautiful spouse for reading the questions and, um, that's it, okay, bye. Thanks for listening, as always, if you enjoyed the podcast, please go ahead and give us a rating and or a review. We'd super appreciate it. You can find our social medias, instagram and tiktok at his intel podcast. For cat behavior consultations, go to catitude-adjustmentcom. Music provided by Cat Beats.

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