Sterling “TrapKing” Davis on Diversity, Masculinity, and Breaking Stereotypes in Animal Rescue

What happens when a rising hip-hop artist swaps tour buses for cat traps? Sterling “Trap King” Davis joins us to break down humane TNR with uncommon clarity and even rarer heart. We dig into how trap, neuter, return actually works, why the R is essential for cat safety, and how colony maintenance - shelters, feeding stations, heated water, and quiet routines - turns chaos into calm. If you’ve ever wondered how to start, what gear to use, or how to keep neighbors supportive, this conversation gives you practical moves and a mindset shift.

Sterling also tackles the stereotypes that keep people out of animal welfare. Men and cats? Yes. Black rescuers in a cat world? Absolutely. He explains how visibility can rewrite the script for boys raised on hypermasculinity, and why “cat dad” often means a man who understands consent and boundaries. We talk about building trust in underserved communities through “in-reach,” partnering with local voices instead of parachuting in with rules and fines. You’ll hear how kids become trap spotters, how one friendly face can change a block’s culture, and how education outperforms enforcement.

Burnout gets real here. Costs have spiked, low-cost spay/neuter slots are scarce, and rescuers can be hardest on one another. Sterling’s One United Paw campaign aims to fix the human side: less competition, more collaboration, and a stronger, more diverse movement. We share feral behavior insights, post-TNR changes, and the myths that refuse to die - black cat “bad luck,” “gay” cats, and the “crazy cat lady” trope. By the end, you’ll see how compassion is not soft - it’s strategy.

Listen, learn the ropes of humane TNR, and walk away with new tools for your colony, your city, and your sanity. If this resonated, subscribe, rate, and leave a review—then share with someone who loves cats or wants to help but doesn’t know where to start.

Transcript

Meet Sterling “Trap King” Davis

Kristiina Wilson 0:00

Hello and welcome to episode 41 of Hiss and Tell Podcast. I am your host, Cat Behaviors Christina Wilson. Today I am talking with Sterling, Trap King Davis, one of the most recognizable faces in humane cat advocacy. We had a really long, really great discussion, which I had to edit a lot, but in this episode, you're gonna listen to us talk about diversity in animal welfare, the truth about TNR, and how compassion might be one of the most radical and misunderstood forms of strength. Here we go. Welcome to another episode of Hiss and Tell. I am your host, Christina Wilson, and with me today is Sterling Trap King Davis. Welcome, Sterling. Thanks for being on the show.

Sterling Davis 0:43

Thank you for having me.

Kristiina Wilson 0:45

So, do you want to tell us a little bit about your story? Um, how it's so unique you went from music to military service to animal advocacy. Like, tell uh tell me a little bit about that.

From Music And Military To Rescue

Sterling Davis 0:56

Yeah, so I've done music my whole life. So that was all that's always been my thing. I have I've always loved cats, but I didn't know anything about cat rescue. It took me a long time to even own a cat because my when I was growing up, my family wouldn't get me cats. It was, yeah, after the military, I think going into the military is what put me in the mind frame of wanting to live a life of service to some extent to help. And I think that, you know, kind of led me to cat rescue. And once I got out the military and I got a cat, I did everything wrong with the cat that kind of made me want to educate and help people that didn't know. Because I it was so many things I didn't know about cats. Like I didn't know that you shouldn't, that you should adopt, not shop, that you shouldn't declaw, uh different foods, everything. Like I went about it the whole wrong way, but I was thinking, hey, I'm I'm a vegetarian and I love animals, so I'm I just I'm doing this right. But I absolutely wasn't doing it right.

Early Trauma And Bond With Cats

Kristiina Wilson 1:57

I mean, I think a lot of us kind of started that way. I also grew up in a no-pet household, and then in early college, my roommate just came home with a cat, and I was like, uh, what? And I also was a vegetarian since I was a little kid, but everything I did from jump was wrong, you know, and I look back on a lot of this stuff just like, oh God. But you know, like you have to start somewhere, and I think the important thing is that you learn and you improve and you keep moving and you keep it pushing and you continue doing continuing education, and that's the important thing. So that all makes sense to me. How did your kind of early experiences with cats shape who you are today?

Sterling Davis 2:34

And we just touched on it a little bit, but so it goes pretty deep early on with cats for me because growing up, I I grew up in rough, underserved neighborhoods. I was abused as a child. So the man that my mother was with, my actually my sister's dad, he probably beat me and my mom for some years, probably about seven, eight years this went on. So a lot of times, like you don't want to go. Kids back then, because I'm old, I don't want to tell my exact age, but I'm old.

Kristiina Wilson 3:06

I think you and I are both old.

Compassion Fatigue And Rescuer Conflict

Sterling Davis 3:09

So back in the day, kids wanted. You we probably come from a time where kids wanted to stay outside all the all day. Like the street lights had to come on to let me know that I have to be in. So with being, with growing up in an abusive household, I would definitely want to stay outside and I would feed and see the stray cats. I would see them and I would feed them, and it was, it was almost like from that point, it was like, oh, I don't have a voice in my house. I don't have nobody that's gonna come save me from my abusive situation. These cats don't have nobody that's gonna save them. Like they don't have no voice, they don't have nothing. So we're one in one. It's like the it made me think back even like Michael Jackson had a song called Ben, and this the song is, you know, it's his relationship with a pet rat that was in his house, and he took care of the rat. And like that whole song was about that rat. It's it's hard for people to understand that sometimes, but especially going through abusive situations, and you have somebody like that. Like for me, that was our connection. I felt like the cats was kind of, I could relate to them, they could relate to me. So it made sense. So that kind of started with the love of cats. But I still didn't know about rescue. I just I just knew I loved cats, I knew I loved animals, but I didn't know nothing about rescue. I just knew they had it rough and nobody was speaking for them, and I had it rough and nobody was speaking for me, so we on the same team.

Kristiina Wilson 4:26

Man, I get that. And I think I think a lot of people, something that doesn't get discussed a lot, but I hope that it will get discussed more, and I think with younger generations it is getting discussed more, is that so many people who work in animal advocacy spaces come from that type of background. That people work with animals because they have a history especially of early childhood trauma and abuse, and animals therefore they they tend to understand them more and they want to help, but they also have a weariness towards people. And so that combines into people looking for caring professionals with non-human animals, and there's so much of that in the just just animal caring professions um and volunteer work, and then that leads to a lot of the time unfortunate, like some interesting interpersonal issues between a lot of people working in these spaces. And I a little bit wish that I think I've said this on like other episodes that I kind of wish that there was a like how to get along with other people class that like people had to take, or just how to express yourself, you know, in a non-combative manner, sort of classes that we all had to take, right? Because so that you don't have to get to like this big age to be able to regulate yourself, to be able to work with each other, because while you're trying to work for the best for the animals, you still have to work with all these people and you can't be getting into crazy fights and stuff.

Sterling Davis 5:59

Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness.

Kristiina Wilson 6:03

Yes, yeah. And there, there's just a lot of that without going too much. There is so much, there's there's just a lot of conflict.

Sterling Davis 6:12

Yeah, it's uh it's a lot of. I mean, I've I'm always TNR doing TNR boots on the ground education, but a lot of what I'm focusing on is that relationships between rescuers. It's it's a it's a doozy.

Kristiina Wilson 6:26

It is it is a doozy.

Sterling Davis 6:28

It's a doozy.

Kristiina Wilson 6:28

It's still that you're using that word. I think we're very much the same age, I think. Oh yeah, but I I really do think that the younger generations of people have have a pretty good handle on this. And because they're much more open to kind of talking about their trauma, they're they don't have a lot of those doors closed, like people maybe of our generation had a lot of doors closed to talking about therapy or going to therapy or talking about mental health or talking about mental illness that like the younger generation seem more open to talking about, hey, this is my trauma and this is why I'm here, and let's all get on the pit like the same page and let's tell let's co-regulate and let's do these things that I think will eventually be really helpful to not having so much interagency and inter advocacy conflict.

Why Men And Cats Still Clash

Sterling Davis 7:13

Right. Yeah. I do love I don't know. I do love that the younger generation is a lot more into everything, expression and dealing with trauma. Because, like, like I say before where me growing up, you didn't talk about it, especially being a black man. You just you stay strong, you don't talk about that, you don't cry, you don't show emotion, you just push forward. You bury it deep down inside and then you just push forward.

Kristiina Wilson 7:44

You left a successful music career to start Trap King Humane Cat Solutions. So what were the biggest challenges in kind of making that transition?

TNR 101 And Why Return Matters

Sterling Davis 7:53

Well, it wasn't that difficult, actually. It was it was a little difficult. And I don't wanna I don't wanna say it was I was like very successful. I was around the I was best point. I was at my highest point in my career. I was around my buddy Jaron Benton, who brought me to the tour that I was on at the time, and he was successful. He still is successful. In Tech Nine, I was on tour with Tech Nine, Tech Nine is successful. So I was at a point where all my hard work was probably about to start paying off. I was starting to get noticed a little bit for music. And then in between that music tour, when I went and just tried to find something to do, because you don't want to do nothing. You don't want to, in between music tours, you don't want to sit and do nothing because you'll just get in trouble and spend a lot of money. Like you, you need to do something. So I went to the local rescue, and since I had my cat at the time, Rick James, I was like, oh, I could go scoop some cat litter for a couple months before I go back on tour. That's a simple, easy job. I like cats. It'll be easy. But that it was a game changer because for one, when I went there and I interviewed, I was like in a shirt and tie. I shouldn't have worn that. And then they interviewed me in a room with a bunch of cats. So she's asking me questions, and I'm just picking up the cats like and I'm like, oh, what did you say? What was that question again? I'm so sorry. What would what did you say? And she's like, I'm asking you this, and I'm like, oh, but look at this little woman. I'm like, look at who he's gonna fall. She's like, I'm asking you these questions. She told me you did really bad the whole interview, like, but I don't we don't get to see a lot of men like you with cats like that. Like, even when I came in, it was like, we thought you were coming to work with the dogs. So when I saw that, when I saw that it was no men, even in the cat department, I was the only man in the cat department, and I was the only black person in the cat department. So it was like, even the guys, the dog guys would come ask me, like, why are you up here? Well, you're trying to get with the ladies, huh? That's why you're working with the cats. And I'm like, why can't I just like the cats? Why can't I just like the cats? I haven't even looked at these girls. I'm literally here for the cats. I like cats. So what but I saw that and I saw how rare it was, like for me. Like it, I was so rare that I was like, when they taught me about rescue and TNR and everybody doing it was just an older white woman. I was like, oh my God, like, so how much we're missing a lot of help if only one demographic is doing this. All this stuff that I'm seeing is literally one demographic doing it. And so I'm like, man, if we could get men like and black people doing this, this would be crazy. Like, it'd be so much more help because all the women that trained me were older white women that were burning out. Yeah. They were in the middle of burning out as they're training me. Like my friend Mickey Blair, Mickey taught me everything. Her last words that she said, she literally threw her notebook at me and was like, take this, maybe you can do it because I can't handle it no more. People are stupid. Maybe they'll listen to you because you're a man, but I'm done. And she just walked, she literally left after that and just burnt out. I've never seen Mickey again.

Kristiina Wilson 11:00

The compassion fatigue is hard. And you really can burn out like super hard like that.

Sterling Davis 11:06

It's a lot. It's a lot. And so that was that was probably my main thing is seeing that is wanting to diversify, wanting to get more men, more people of color engaged in it because it was so many people just had no idea what it was or what it was about or that these women are doing it.

Kristiina Wilson 11:22

Why do you think it's such a I mean, I have plenty of my own thoughts on this, but like, why do you think that cats are such a like weird thing for men to be involved with? Is do you think it's because they people have this idea they're not trainable like dogs, or like dogs are masculine and cats are feminine, or what do you think the the deal is with dudes and cats?

Colony Care And Cold-Weather Maintenance

Sterling Davis 11:43

It's it's everything. I think it's a lot. It's a it's a is that it's a lot of things. So I think because I have I have five sisters, and I could tell you from growing up with and having five sisters, I don't want to go too deep, but putting the gender on animals like that tells a lot about how this country feels about women. So I think it has a lot to do with that. It's hypermasculinity. It is the training thing. People think that you can't train a cat, and you probably, I mean, train maybe isn't the word, they're probably training you, but you can do this, and uh, it's the it's the outgoing thing too. It's the outgoing, you think with a dog, I could go outside, I could be active, I could do this. I can't do that with a cat. And it's definitely the consent. Because I tell all my sisters, as a cat dad, you understand boundaries. Cats, you have boundaries. With a dog, y'all just get all on each other's face and it's all good. It's no boundaries, it's no consent. With a cat, you have to approach like, you can't just, no, you have to, here, here's my hand, let me, you can smell it. You know, it's consent. So I think a lot of it's a lot of, it's a lot of stuff. But the hypermasculine part of it, the consent part, those are, those are things. And I think it unfortunately has a it says a lot about what we feel about women in this country because we put that gender on it and then we make it everything bad. It's kind of, it's, it's, it's, it's a lot. It's it's weird. I've had I had to tell some young guys the other day, like, because they were doing that, a boy told me that he thought all dogs were males, all cats were females. That's what he thought. Yeah. That's that's what he understood. And I was and so for that, he thought that cats were weak and just wasn't as cool. And I broke, I had to, I broke down the Black Panther, like the movie. I was like, you like the Black Panther, you like that. It's a superhero. And he was like, Yeah, the Black Panther's crazy. I was like, that's a cat. The Panther is a cat. And a lion is the king of the jungle. There's no dog that's gonna beat that cat. So think about that when you think it was just weak, or women or cats, or all of this stuff is weak. Just know it goes a little deeper than that. So it's I I I think it has a lot. A lot plays into that, those stereotypes. Because even with me growing up, my uncles would always be like strolling out there with those, with those cats again. He, you know, he acts like a little girl and he wanna wear his hair like this. He's painting his fingernails again. Like it's it's it's a lot of hypermasculinity around it, which is the craziest thing in the world. Because I I would say, not just because I'm a cat dad, I think some of the best men are probably cat dads, if only for the consent thing, if only understanding boundaries.

Kristiina Wilson 14:25

So I I 100% agree. And I feel like we could do a whole podcast just on what we just touched on right there, right? Like we could have like a whole separate podcast that's just that for season.

Sterling Davis 14:38

Just that, just that. It could be all ongoing. Yeah, it could even be all ongoing.

Kristiina Wilson 14:43

It will go on to infinity because America is so crazy. So you're a nonprofit, it focuses on humane TNR. So can you, for people who may not be familiar with it, explain what TNR is, why it's important, and then what do you mean by humane TNR?

Sterling Davis 14:59

So TNR is trap neuter return. It's the process of, well, it's the over it's to prevent overpopulation and spread disease amongst cats. Right. So it's the process where cats are caught in humane traps. They're taken to low-cost spay neuter clinics, they're spayed, neutered, vaccinated, and they're returned back to their colony. Uh, and this prevents overpopulation spread disease. It's very important. The R is extremely important because they it is important that they are returned back to their colony. Going to new areas can be dangerous. The cats in that area are gonna be like, oh, you here for mates and food. We gotta take you out. So it's important that the cat is returned to familiar area, familiar smells, sights, and everything. And another part that's not a part of TNR, you don't hear that a lot, but maintain. It's very important to also, after you do TNR, to maintain that colony. And that's the that's one of the humane parts about it.

Speaker 2 15:54

Mm-hmm.

Sterling Davis 15:55

The humane things about it is it's controlling the population. Before a lot of amazing women was out doing this, we were just euthanizing.

Speaker 2 16:04

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 16:04

So the humane part is that we are controlling the population in a humane manner. They're not being euthanized or hurt. And also a part of that humanity too is the maintenance after the TNR, like feeding them out of sight, out of mind in bushes where they're not out in the open for people to hurt them or in danger and things like that. So maintaining the colony as well.

Kristiina Wilson 16:26

Right. And I think that includes, I know you're in California, so you don't have to worry about cold weather so much, but at least here I'm in Connecticut now, we have, at least on our property, we have five feral houses, you know, filled with straw, because right now we have sub-zero temperatures and three feet of snow, you know, digging paths for them so they can get out, they can get to their heated water bowls, to their food, to and from their shelters, you know, maintaining the food, maintaining the shelters, all of that jazz as well. And then if you're able to um to handle them at all doing like a yearly deworming, et cetera, because they do pick up a lot of stuff being out there.

Sterling Davis 17:05

Um I gotta I've my colony outside, uh I I monitor them and keep up with them as and they help as much as possible. I just had a health scare because one of my cats, orange boy named Method Man, he didn't eat for a couple days, and I'm like, oh my goodness. But he he ate this morning, okay.

Kristiina Wilson 17:30

You don't need more.

Sterling Davis 17:32

No.

Kristiina Wilson 17:33

Ugh, yeah. Whenever cats don't eat, that's awful. I always like go to the most dramatic scenario, and my wife is always like, just calm down. Like, it's always okay. And I'm like, no, no, we have to trap them, we have to save the university batteries. And I'm just like, just it's just chill out. I'm like, I can't, I can't.

Sterling Davis 17:48

I'm if they eat, if they eat and pooping, I can breathe. If they stop eating and pooping, and I I'm not gonna make it. I'm not gonna make it. I'm gonna I'm gonna overdo it.

Kristiina Wilson 17:58

I have that problem as well. Maybe we should start texting each other.

Sterling Davis 18:01

Right, right. That's it, just like uh breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe. Like, I'm like, oh goodness.

Kristiina Wilson 18:12

I know. Or when one of them doesn't show up, so we have all these cats who just come onto our property, and so we've done so much TNR, and of course, like we name them all stupid names. Like one of them is Mr. P P because he used to just piss around the house and upset all of our guys, right? So when we were we TNR'd him, and then he's been coming for a couple years, and then there was like six months where he didn't come, and I was like, oh no, like a coyote got him or a bear got him or something, and then he just showed right back up again, super fat, and just like, hey, it's me. But now if he doesn't like, he didn't show up last night, and I was like, Oh no, Mr. BB's got it, like he loves to just scare the crap out of me. Yeah and then he'll just show up like they do.

Sterling Davis 18:51

I'm waiting, I'm literally waiting on three. I've had three disappear and three new ones come, but I'm waiting on the three, and it's always like that. Anytime, any colony I've cared for, cattle go, you'll panic, and they'll waltz back up like two months later, like, hey, what's wrong with you? And it's like, I've been I almost killed somebody about you.

In-Reach: Building Trust In Communities

Kristiina Wilson 19:11

Like they're just out there doing side quests. Like, I don't know what they're up to. They're just going on a vacation. I don't know where he's got the money to wherever he's going to Jamaica or whatever he's doing, or he's getting fat and sassy, but like I don't appreciate it.

Sterling Davis 19:25

I'm fussing.

Kristiina Wilson 19:26

Anyway, yeah.

Sterling Davis 19:27

I fuss. I'm like, I want to know who's giving you this type of wet food all the time, every day. Two times a day, this type of wet food. Show me them. What what what's more important than this for you to be gone that long?

Kristiina Wilson 19:39

I know. I want to know about Mr. PB because he ate fat, like fat, and he has stayed fat. So he's clearly working some people. Or somebody else trapped him and then tried to domesticate him, and he was just like he's got some legendary side-eye. Anyway. Okay. So I want to get it back to what we talked about a little bit before we started recording, which was that part of your mission is breaking stereotypes about who participates in animal welfare work. And I want to know what that has looked like on the ground in diverse communities for you and just talk about kind of diversity and animal welfare in general.

Sterling Davis 20:16

Yeah, I think it's been it's been going good. Lot of lot of what I've been doing or a lot of what I've planned to do, I feel like I have been able to do to a certain extent.

Speaker 2 20:27

Mm-hmm.

Sterling Davis 20:28

As far as having men see this, having men see me and say, Oh, I can do that without my masculinity dropping off and, you know, being unattractive or whatever. I can do this. So I've I've seen it. Some of it is in weird wrong ways. Like I'll I'll be out trapping with a bunch of ladies all night. You know, I even made a song about it called Me and Your Mama Be Trapping. A rap song just to mess with men about it. Like, if you don't like me out with your mama all night, maybe you should come with us or come with her. So, but a lot of it, so many guys have reached out and like, you was out with all those ladies all night, like just you. And I'm thinking, yeah, but and I'm like, you know what? Yep, I am. I'm out with all those ladies. And if you do TNR, you could probably be out with all these ladies too. Yeah, you should do it. I'm not gonna tell you that all of them are actually lesbians and none of them like me like that, but I was out I was out all night with those women. Yep. If that's what you want to do, if that'll get you to do TNR, yeah, come on out. I'm not even I won't mention to you that every one of them with purple hair are lesbians and don't want me at all. But if that's what's gonna get you to come out, green.

Kristiina Wilson 21:36

Listen, some of us are bisexual, you know. You never know. Let's not have any biaranger on the bottom. But yeah.

A Day In The Life Of TNR

Sterling Davis 21:47

It's just so funny because I've seen some of it, not always for the right reasons, but I've I've definitely seen a change. And I've seen uh a change as far as people understand it, because A lot of times in underserved communities, you'll see a dead cat in the street or a possum or a raccoon. And growing up with that, and you see it there, they don't come clean it up. So it'll sit there until it's just smashed in a part of the street almost. So they they people grow up desensitized to it. It's just another thing. So a lot of just seeing me out and interacting with the cat, I've seen behaviors change as far as, oh, wow, that is bad that the cat was laid dead out there in the street like that. Like we should we should do this. It's not as I see people as not in underserved communities, not as desensitized and feeling sane. You know, if peep people see themselves, then they can see, okay, it was like what Barack being president. I saw him president, and I felt like, oh man, maybe I could do more in life if he's doing that. Maybe it is, maybe I can do more. So to see, to see someone doing that, I think, I think it's helped out a lot just seeing a man go out and be compassionate. I'm still cool. I rap, but I'm I'm compassionate. I'm not some hyper-masculine dude that can't help. And I think seeing that and learning, education. I've had so many people in underserved communities come to me and they're afraid of their local rescue.

unknown 23:15

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 23:16

Or they're afraid of animal control. Because I'll go and they'll say, Man, you know, they came over here and they won't give me no food to help me or nothing. But then they find me. They gave me a ticket and they said, My dog is tethered to a tree. And he's like, I don't even know what tethered means. And I'm like, that's messed up because they gave this man a ticket. They didn't educate him. I was like, your dog is tied to the tree. Don't do that. That's tethered. That's why they find you. And it is wrong for you to do that, but I wish they would have explained to you the correct way to go about it instead of just giving you a ticket. Because once that happens, they just, you know, they don't want to work with the local rescue. They don't want to work with animal control. It's like, you just find me, so you're after me now. So now I don't want to have a relationship with you. So I've I what I've been doing, one of the main things that I take pride in is being better at building that relationship between the underserved communities and the local animal rescue because they are there to help you.

Speaker 1 24:12

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 24:13

There's just not a connection. They're not connecting. They don't know how to communicate as much. So I've I like being that bridge.

Feral Behavior And Colony Dynamics

Kristiina Wilson 24:19

Of course. And I I think kind of like we said, the communication can be problematic sometimes, which with people in this space, my wife and I before we moved here to Connecticut, we lived in a very underserved neighborhood in the city. And I lived there for 20 years. And so I, before I started doing cat work or just animal work there, I just really got to know everyone in the community. You know, like I knew the dealers, I knew the grandmas who played dominoes on the street, I knew everybody with the pit bulls who, like we adopted a pit bull, you know. So we just knew everybody and we became known as, oh, those crazy white cat ladies, right? But then then we were able to be able to have people, we knew all the kids on the street. So then people were able to come to our house, knock on the door, and be like, hey, there's a situation, or this deli has a bunch of kittens that are just giving away. Can you come help? So people would come then and ask for help. And it was so much more effective that way to have people be able to come and be your friend and see you as someone who would help versus somebody who's just coming out like yelling at people. And I think you're able to do so much more work that way.

Speaker 2 25:26

Yeah.

Kristiina Wilson 25:28

Rather than I think somebody who's not in the community just coming in and kind of barking. Yeah. Because that's nobody's I would close my ears to that. If somebody just came into my house like screaming at me about something, I'd be like, why don't you just get out of my house? You know, I don't I don't want to hear that. Yeah, exactly. So I I think I again wish that there was some kind of a a class or some kind of an instructions for how you could people could embed themselves within communities before trying to go in and start this work because then the community is really gonna help itself.

Post-TNR Behavior Changes

Sterling Davis 26:02

Right. Yeah, that's the that I mean being a part of the community. One thing that I love working, a group that I worked with, I've worked with a lot, uh, named Care. It's called Care Companions and Animals for Reform and Equity. And one of the things that they would always preach about going into underserved communities, as far as animals that I love, is you have outreach, but this was in-reach. They would do what they call was in reach. And basically what it was was what you were saying is you find you reach in the community and find someone that your person, you get your person and you go through them versus coming in the community, you you you reach in the community and you get that person. And that's something that I've I've found, you know, what works for me is I would go in different neighborhoods in my RV and I would just have contests for the children in the in the apartment complex. So I would tell them, okay, whoever text messages me first, let me know that one of these traps is full, you get $20. Whoever texts me second, you get $15. Whoever third, you get $10. We don't have a lot of money in rescue, so I can only do that like once or once or twice. But after like the second time I do it, and I come in and I drive in, cats running on the side of my vehicle with a cat in their hand, like the ice cream truck. Like, I can I get money for this? Can I get money? And then when I tell when I tell this the kids in this community, well, I can't do that anymore. I don't have that, so I'm not gonna be able to run the contest no more. Then all the kids stop, but it's like one or two, and that's your trap queen. That's your trap king. They're gonna grow up, they're gonna be in it, they're gonna get their parents too. They're gonna go talk to their parents, and they're gonna be like, Trap King said you don't lose coupones for compassion, or you gotta help the cats. And the parents gonna have to say, okay, who I need to see about this bald tattoo dude out here talking to these kids. Like, what is this? What's up with the cats? And then the parents get into it, and it helps, it helps a lot. So I I really like what you said, the being a part of the community or having someone that's a part of the community to help explain it. Because when we go in and we're in uniform and we jump out the van like the 18 and start doing this, we we're we're ending it. We're not gonna be able to talk to them at all after that.

Speaker 1 28:18

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 28:18

We it's gonna be hard. They'll never take you seriously after that. So it's that's definitely a big thing. I I I do think the in-reach or having somebody in the community is a big deal.

Kristiina Wilson 28:29

It's true. Okay, so what does a typical day look like for you? Are you trapping? Are you educating? What what are you up to on a typical day?

Misconceptions About Feral Cats

Sterling Davis 28:37

Typical day is well, every day is a new challenge or a new adventure. But usually for me, I'm getting up and like before I even get out to bed, I'm laying there going through emails. I get a lot of emails from different cities, from different states. People want me to help them pay for TNRs, or they want me to come do TNRs and or it's an educational event, things like that. So I go through emails, get up. If I have some surgery spots, then I'm going out to trap. The surgery spots will usually be tomorrow, of course. So if I have surgery spots for tomorrow, trapping at night, I usually uh trap pretty much all night if I'm trapping in an area. I'm it's usually a colony. You want to focus on a colony at a time. So I'm probably trapping, staying at that colony. Intake is usually between seven and some places maybe nine, nine is late. Usually intake is a lot earlier. It's usually seven o'clock. So you up early, dropping the cats off, and just educating. I try to make time for social media. I'm not, like I said, I'm older, so I grew up when I was growing up, there was no cell phones or internet when I was in high school. So I'm not, I would never call myself internet savvy. Everybody like, you are influencer. And I'm like, I guess I don't really know what I'm doing that much. I think I just know famous people. But that's a typical day. That's me. I'll try to do some social media in-between, pick up. You're gonna pick up the cats. With males' cats, they can heal 24 hours. The surgery isn't as extensive. Female cats usually 48 hours, let them heal, and then I'll be returning them. Try to make my videos. I like to uh have cats run out just like cool new music, like running out of the trap, like with some new rap music or something playing. So that's a that's a that's a typical day. Uh answer emails during the rescue, and of course, two times a day, I still have my indoor cats, my babies, and my outdoor, the King's Cloud are outside, who I feed twice a day. So yeah, that's a that's a typical day for me.

Kristiina Wilson 30:43

So I wanted to, since we were kind of talking about behavior already, talk a little bit about behavior since this is the behavior of a podcast. So when you're trapping in the same colonies, do you notice individual behavior differences in the cats? Do you notice that there's especially bold cats or cats who are like more heidi or like different group dynamics?

Sterling Davis 31:03

Oh yeah, that it's always. I usually can see the pet, I could tell the pecking orders kind of fast usually because it's and the and the peckin' orders is usually the big tuxedo boy or the big orange boy. The smarter ones is usually the calicos, the girls, they're always smarter. Like, that's like a real thing. The girls always seem to be smarter. I've had mom sit by the trap, outside the trap, and stop her babies from go her little ones from going in. And I was like, oh my God, you are you're doing like you really gonna sit by the trap. And they'll just walk up and they'll smell the food in there, and she'd be like, nope, watch out. And I'm like, so it's you, I gotta get you. So I definitely certain behaviors, like the orange boys are always the go-getters, the daredevils. Yeah. Yeah, they stay more social. They're gonna do the crazy stuff. The calicos are they're usually like the the moms, the smart ones. They're probably better at hunting, but they're not gonna let you get up on them. They don't usually, they're smarter than that. The orange boys are the ones that'll be dumb enough to walk up to anybody. They that's it's always them. The one in my colleague now, the orange boy in my colleague now, the method man, he just runs in. The first time I fed, I opened the door, just ran in the house, and I was like, Well, that's smart. You don't even know what's in here. He just, I'm going. That's that's the orange boys for you. They are yeah, they go. The siames, I don't have a ran into more Siames more lately, which is usually not a lot, but they are the talkative ones. They always loud. I mean, siamese have always been loud. That seemed like they want to say something to us. That's how Nipsey was. So yeah, I definitely see different. I could usually tell the pecking orders. I could see who probably the main mama is. And I definitely could see the the testosterone neck field bully boy that's probably, you know, he's wandering around slow motion, like like he owned the block.

Kristiina Wilson 32:59

Because they usually do. So those big dudes, they usually do. So do you notice any behavioral changes in those cats after TNR? Like as you're going to maintain the colony?

One United Paw: Uniting Rescuers

Sterling Davis 33:11

Well, yeah. The boys calm down considerably over time. Like, once they get fixed, they calm down so much. The only thing that's funny about the the calico is the girls, they usually know they remember me and they'll they like want to go into traps because they like they already ear tipped and fixed, so they like, he's just gonna let us in a trap and we'll eat and just go back. He's gonna let us out. So let's just keep doing it. Let's just follow him around. So they have followed me, but I do see the behavior calm down. And even as far as the neighbors, like, because a lot of people never understand why it's like I got a dead mouse on my steps, and it's like, well, you feed that cat, right? Mm-hmm. That's a gift. They're giving you a gift. That calms down. That the hunt, as much as they hunt, that calms down when they're fixed. Like they don't do as as much crazy stuff. It's not a lot as fighting. You don't hear as many of the fights at all because and most people think it's just fights, and I'm like, they might be mating, unfortunately.

Kristiina Wilson 34:08

Yeah, it sounds the same.

Sterling Davis 34:10

Yeah, it's all the same. But a lot, but you hear so much less of that. Yeah. You hear less of that. And again, with maintaining a colony and keeping them out of sight, like feeding them behind bushes somewhere where they're not in the streets or near roads, or where people can that don't like them will see them. You see a lot less cats being in the street, getting hit by cars and things like that, because they have the area, and they're not as big as crazy risk takers anymore. Like they, they, they, they can't they definitely calm down a whole lot.

Kristiina Wilson 34:39

Testosterone is a crazy drug.

Sterling Davis 34:42

Oh my goodness, boys. It's doing something to the world.

Kristiina Wilson 34:45

Yeah, I mean, we could get into that and the whole thing about compassion being cool. Uh that's a whole other podcast. Wait, we have a lot of podcasts to start, my guy. We've got a lot of podcasts to do.

Sterling Davis 35:04

We've got a lot of podcasts. A lot of podcasts.

Kristiina Wilson 35:07

So many, so many podcasts to do. But from your perspective, is there a big misunderstanding that people have about feral cats and feral cat behavior that you would want to correct?

Sterling Davis 35:18

Well, okay, it's two things. One of them is hilarious. Let me say this first. One of them is hilarious, is I guess it goes back to the guy not wanting his cat to lose his manhood. We gotta stop putting these human things on cats. I had a woman that called me for weeks about coming to take one cat out of the neighborhood that I already fixed because she felt like that cat was gay and trying to make her male cat gay. Are you serious? And that was her whole and she was so serious. She was like, why he be licking on him like that then? And I was like, You mean grooming him? And I was like, man, I don't I I mean it took a minute because I was like, I think you're joking with me. I think you joke with me, but I don't want to be insensitive. Yeah. Because maybe you don't know what you're saying, but grooming, I was like, first of all, the cat ain't gay. I don't like and I'm and I'm not coming to remove a cat that I already fixed, it's fine. You could keep your cat in the house and stop letting it be indoor or outdoor if you're worried about that. But whatever you're worried about, it's it's not gay. So if I've heard that, I've heard that too many times. Grooming is it could be a form of pecking orders and it's a bonding thing. It's it's a lot of things. It's not that. So that's one misconception. It's not sexual. And it's not like us. Like that woman cat. I've had a woman tell me, hey, don't get her fixed. She has a right, like a woman, to have children too one day, and she do that. I'm like, it's not the same thing for that. She's getting raped in the streets.

Speaker 1 36:40

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 36:41

It's a totally different thing. So those those are some misconceptions about the gay thing and about the cat's rights to have babies. Those are two things that I hear a lot of, and it's like, that's not what this is. That's not, that's just not what it is.

Speaker 1 36:54

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 36:55

Also, the of course the bad luck thing with black cats.

Resources, Costs, And Burnout

Kristiina Wilson 36:58

I heard that a lot in my old neighborhood. So much when I would trap black cats, and I had a lot of black. We still have, we have three black cats in our house now, but yeah, always the the dudes that hung around the deli and stuff, they'd be like, No, you can't trap that cat. That's bad luck. Like, just leave it alone. And blah, like, what are you talking about? Like, yeah. That's so dumb.

Sterling Davis 37:20

The bad luck and then the the cat is attacking me thing. I've heard that. Like, you're not gonna walk past a bush and the cat just see you and randomly want to jump out at you. That cat, more than likely, that cat is nursing. That's a mama cat nursing in those bushes. If she jumped out at you, she's not just some crazy cat that wants to kill all humans. You probably walk by where she's nursing her babies. And just like any other mother, she's gonna protect her babies. So, but no, cats aren't chasing after people in the street. I've heard people be like, no, I'm telling you, the cat hates me. No, the cat, no, the cat don't hate you. It's not doing that. It's not. So that's those are some of the misconceptions. And as far as related to the cats, is the the the crazy cat lady thing. Like, she's not crazy. The the older lady at the end of your block that's spending her social security check to take care of those cats is not a witch. She's not crazy. She's just compassionate and she's helping keep the community clean, actually. Like so those are some misconceptions. I really hate the that crazy lady, the witch up the street. And I'm like, how does she why y'all just deemed her a witch because it's a lot of cats? Like, she's spending her social security money to feed these cats. Like, it would be crazier if she wasn't here.

Kristiina Wilson 38:34

So it's it's a lot of times, I think a lot of times the people, and I think a part of the reason that the crazy cat lady thing exists is that people, specifically a lot of times, straight men get upset that women are spending their time helping someone that's not them.

Sterling Davis 38:53

Which is wild because I mean, nurturing is women nurture. I mean, that's a that's a that's a thing, regardless. So I don't, you know, I I think if you put a woman in any situation, she's gonna nurture something, she's gonna make something better, she's gonna be doing it anyway. So it don't it don't have to just be for you. It's cool.

Kristiina Wilson 39:12

And I've heard that also from friends of mine who've had kids that the man will get angry at the mom giving the baby attention and compassion, right? I've like it's it's that because it's not the focus on that dude that the dude's like, well, you know, like it's very strange. Like they want you to be compassionate, but only towards them. They want you to be caring, but only towards them. And so if that's not where the focus is, then it's crazy.

Sterling Davis 39:41

I've had yeah, I've ex yeah, I've seen that a lot with men and children. Like and they'll be jealous of the I don't have any children myself, and I can't imagine being that way, but I do think it is that a it it definitely is a thing. Because I've heard women that I trap with, they've been with men and they're like, I think he's jealous of my cats.

Speaker 1 40:02

Yeah.

How To Connect With Trap King

Sterling Davis 40:02

And I've had, I've, I mean, I've ended dates over it. I've literally ended dates. Like I've had, we've had a great date. Woman comes over, she sees the cat. She like, what is that? I'm like, don't say that. He has a name. His name is Rick. His name is Rick James, don't do that. And she like, you know, I don't know if I could deal with this. Like, I don't think you're a straight man. You got your nails painted, you got cats. I don't think you're a straight man. And I'm like, what does that have to do with, what does that have to do with anything? Because I got cats and my nails are painted. Like, what? It's it helped me. It helped me so much. Like, I have like a ton of friends in rescue. Of course, it's all women, but it's good. Like, we do good because, and they say the same thing. Like, I what about Friends She was like, I've never liked a man a day in my life. But I could see myself being with you, Sterling. And I don't even like men. But she was like, I like your heart, I respect how you feel. I think your mama raised you right. But it's it's so rare, it's so rare that a you know, guys will try to even understand that. So we put that hypermasculinity and stuff on everything, and it's in this cat world, it's in the rescue, it happens. We put genders on animals, it's crazy. It's crazy.

Kristiina Wilson 41:14

I know. Yeah. America. Yay. I mean, there's a whole other podcast there. Like America and hypermasculinity and its or origins and colonialism and any okay, okay.

Closing And Host Resources

Sterling Davis 41:33

I definitely one thing I would love to talk about is so much of what we've been saying, what I'm working on going forward is one up. I have a campaign called One Up, One United Paw. And One United Paw is myself, uh, two of my close friends, Sally, Sally and Aaron. They both work for an organization called Mission Meow. And but we started One United Paw, and it's based, it's basically that. It's the relationship between people and animal rescue and animal welfare. It even goes as far as breeders, because as a rescuer, I don't, I don't like breeding at all. I don't really have respect for how it's done. But even with one united paw, it's an attempt to communicate with everybody that's in it. Sure. Like to some extent, because we can't, we see what politics look like, and it's just fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, and things aren't getting done. It's just a fight, fight. Everybody is getting to the point to where I'm gonna go lower. Well, you went that low, I'm gonna go lower. I'm worse, I'm worse, I'm worse. And is it gets to be too much? So one united paw is just about uh the rescue people coming together. Because compassion, fatigue, and burnout, it's not coming from the actual animals. We we knew when we got started. We knew when we got started. Most of us got started because we saw a cat or a dog, their eyes popping out, their head, they on the streets, they tied up to a fist. We so it it touched us and we got into it. So we're expecting to see the animals hurt and go through that. But what we don't expect is that I'm gonna come out with these two traps and somebody that's doing the same thing will say, all you did was catch two cats? Nothing. I caught 30 the other day. You need to do something better. You're not doing enough. You're not, oh, you having fun. You have you doing something outside of cats, you got time for yourself. Oh, you're not a real rescuer then. You're not. So we we we burn each other out. We burn each other out. So one United Paw is really trying to bring people together and have those conversations of, you know, if you go in this community, if you do it, if you go into this area, here's how you should be, here's how we should work. Let's work together, let's do this instead of so much competition, because it's it's brutal. As the great work that we do is still brutal because I will one democra, one, one of anything is gonna make it bad. Like Cat Rescue has. Have been older women. And if that's the only one doing it, then of course it's gonna get bad. If you had just a bunch of black men, then you would it would be pissing contests all day long. Like it would be it would become toxic. Anything and when it's one, diversity is better. The best profitable, profitable, peaceful everything in anything, diversity is better. It's better to have diverse communities. So one United Paul is just really trying to bring the rescuers together because we can set the traps and we can get the funds. We can raise funds. But one thing that we're not doing is helping one another. We're not compassionate towards one another. Some of the meanest things I've seen is one rescuer talk to another rescuer. And it's almost like, wow, you're gonna break that person down and they're not gonna want to do it anymore. And I've seen it on posts. It's so it's one thing for somebody to come at me because people know me and a lot of people say good things to me. So that's great. So when somebody says something bad, it's kind of like, well, this is one bad comment versus the 80 great comments. So I'm not, I don't take it. But if somebody just started and they had they're not getting a bunch of great comments, and the first and only comment they get is from somebody saying, Well, that's stupid. You're dumb, you're doing it wrong. They they're gonna quit. They don't want to do this no more. They don't they don't like us, they don't like our community because they think those cat animal people are weird. It's like that. I'm vegan now, and it's it's like that in a vegan community. We don't attract anybody by just, oh, you drinking milk. It's not, that doesn't attract anybody. So one united paw is something that I'm really working on, and it's focused towards the people because it's the people, you know, we we need the help. We're burning each other out. We love the cats, and we're gonna do, we're gonna do for the animals everything we can, but we have to be a little more compassionate towards one another. So that's what one united paw is all about, and I've been trying to push it. Uh, you'll be seeing more shirts with one up on them soon. It's it's kind of cool. But I wanna, when I go to different cities, I wanna have just different fun meetups. Like we take some pictures, we go out to eat, and you just meet your fellow rescuers. The person that's been probably right around the corner from you trapping that you, for whatever reason, don't like, y'all are on the same team, so y'all can get to know each other.

Kristiina Wilson 46:16

So that's a great idea. And I wonder also how much of the the burnout that I think a lot of us have experienced, and certainly know people who have experienced, how much of it comes from the lack of resources that are allocated in so many communities. Some communities have good resources, like New York City, when I started, had great resources. The shelter would um ACC, which is New York City's open intake shelter, animal care and control, would give you $150 for every cat that you got adopted out, which was amazing. So, like if you took a mom and her kittens, that would pay for the most of the vetting and all of that with the that money dried up forever ago. But they had that, and then you know, but then there's ASPCA, Mobile Spay, and Neutervan, and then that their setups, which once you're in the network, like you can sign up for the appointments. Again, then I came out here to Connecticut and there's nothing. There's not one available resource from your town, your city, or your state. And so everything is you're paying yourself to go to a private vet. And so every TNR costs me $900, which is crazy, right? Like so that's gonna burn you out a lot faster. So, not to make this an example of me, but I think oh, it burns out people really fast when there's no resources and there's no community help at all.

Sterling Davis 47:31

Yeah, I mean, you like I said, you think the reason there's no resources, a span neuter, like even here in California, you know, low cost out here is probably like 200. That's what they but when I lived in Atlanta, you know, I was there was a time, especially before the pandemic. I mean, that was like $25, $30 TNRs. As long as you bought them, as long as they came inside traps and you understood they would be ear-tipped, you could get a spay and neuter for like $25. And now it's like, it's nothing. You can't do anything for $25. It's we're not gonna do anything. We won't even look at them for $25. So it's like that's the that's definitely a lot of the burnout. That's why I say, like what we were saying before, talking about the older woman at the end of the block taking care of the cats, being mean to her or calling her a witch. You don't understand how much it's costing her to buy that food. It's nobody helping her. You know, she she's she probably lost family members. These are probably her family members now, and she's feeding and taking care of them. It's not cheap for her.

Speaker 1 48:32

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 48:33

So, yeah, that burnout of compassion fatigue, it definitely comes from other people. And I'm I I'm hoping one united pod. Things like that. I've started things like it before that I tried to get off the ground. I had a thing called, I have, it's a Facebook group called Rescue and the Rescuers Now. And I actually started that group and just couldn't maintain it. So I have friends that's running it now. But I've been trying to do that since I've seen the, seen people in our environment fight, in our world fight, since I've seen it, and I've seen that's the that's usually where people give up at. I've never heard somebody really say, I just can't do it because of the cats or the animals no more. It's it's usually like the cost. I can't do the prices. I my health is bad, and the people, these people are driving me crazy. I'm, you know, it's just like with me. I tripped over Nipsey and Nipsey hurt, and I got him at the vet. I don't know what my ankle is doing. We'll find out about that later.

Kristiina Wilson 49:31

Oh no.

Sterling Davis 49:32

I just need to get my baby right.

Kristiina Wilson 49:34

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 49:35

So, but that's the rescuer mentality. Like it's, you know, we we we will kick our own butts. So the last thing we need is other people kicking our butts. So I'm hoping one united paw. That's that's that's what I'm really, Trap King is really looking forward to help the relationships between rescuers. That's how we will be stronger. That's how we'll change laws. If we if we walk in these, if we walk to these councilmen and in these courtrooms and we're united, genuinely united, then we'll we'll make and diverse too, because I've heard, I've heard so many men say that. Oh, that's just those crazy ladies. We're not gonna pay attention to them. So that's how you feel about that, huh? Like, forget what they're talking about. It was just a group of women's solicits, ignore it.

Kristiina Wilson 50:16

Yep. I mean, you'd be you'd be surprised. Yeah.

Sterling Davis 50:21

Yeah. One united paw. That's what I'm I want us, I want us united and stronger together.

Kristiina Wilson 50:27

So Well, how can people find out more information? Where should people go on the internet to find you or to find more information about one united paw?

Sterling Davis 50:35

Like, so right now right now we there is an Instagram page for one united paw. Or you you could probably find it if you come to my page on Instagram, the original Trap King on Instagram, Trap King and Sterling Davis on Facebook, and also the website uh www.trapkinghumane.com.

Speaker 1 50:56

Okay.

Sterling Davis 50:57

You can find all of the stuff that's going on, and I'm usually, like I say, on my Instagram and Facebook stuff, I'm just you'll see the bald guy with a ton of cats in every post. So it's hard to it's hard.

Kristiina Wilson 51:10

How how many cats do you have personally?

Sterling Davis 51:13

Personally, right now I have three. So my oldest, Demita Joe, she was my bottle baby. Demita Joe, that's all my cats are after musicians, my favorite musicians. That's the theme. So yeah, I have a I've loved music. So Demita Joe is Janet Jackson's middle name. Nipsey Cuddle is from the rapper Nipsey Hustle, who I loved. Alanis Muisset, I think is I think that goes without saying. Yeah. I think Alanis is the greatest of all time. I know every song of Jag a Little Pill. It's not up for debate. I had a Taylor Swift Alanis Morset argument the other day, and I was like, we're not, we're not gonna have this argument. I like Taylor, but Alanis is something different.

Speaker 1 51:53

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 51:55

But yeah, so that's my babies. I got three at Nipsey, who I'll be picking up from the vet soon. Those are my three babies. Even my outdoor babies are named out, like Method Man outside. Charlotte is from Good Charlotte. I have Otis, who is Otis Redding. He's an orange boy. Why not be Otis Reddings?

Kristiina Wilson 52:13

Yeah.

Sterling Davis 52:14

Yeah. Solways Music Feed.

Kristiina Wilson 52:16

That's cute. I love it. Well, thank you so much for having this chat with me. It was so nice to meet you, and this was a really fun discussion.

Sterling Davis 52:24

Thank you. Thank you for having me.

Kristiina Wilson 52:26

I think I feel like we could fill another 800 podcasts with offshoot topics.

Sterling Davis 52:30

I'm like, I'm already like, hey, you I need to come back. I need to come back. Most of I'd be on a lot of interviews. We don't get to get to any good stuff. And I feel like I have more people saying, I want to know your how you feel about certain things more than just because it's always just cats. If you see me, it's cats, cats, cats, cats. And it's like, Trap King, how do you feel about this? You don't post nothing but cats. So I'm like, I can talk a little bit more. I have feelings and opinions about other stuff.

Kristiina Wilson 52:57

So I never have a shortage of feelings and opinions myself. Problem. So I'm sure my wife loves it. So it's so fun living with me. But yeah, anytime you're always, always welcome to come back and thanks for being here.

Sterling Davis 53:16

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Kristiina Wilson 53:18

Thanks so much for listening to the show. If you're looking for one-on-one support with behavior issues like litter box problems, aggression, anxiety, or multicat dynamics, you can find me through my behavior consulting business, Catitude Adjustment, at catitude adjustment.com. If you like the episode, please consider leaving a rating or review. It really helps us grow. For more episodes, show notes, and resources, head to hissandtelpodcast.com. Huge thanks to Cat Beats for the music, and I'll see you next time.