55: Imposter Syndrome

In this episode, I open up about a recent bout with imposter syndrome and how it affected my confidence as a business owner. I'll share the highs and lows, including moments of feeling like a fraud and the encouraging shifts that helped me regain perspective. Listen in as I explore the importance of changing our inner dialogue, the role of supportive communities, and the incremental successes that remind us of our progress. This episode is a heartfelt reminder that we are not alone in our struggles and underscores the value of having mentors and coaches to guide us through challenging times.

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Beth Whitworth
• 0:36 Reflecting on Last Week's Challenges
• 1:53 Imposter Syndrome in Business
• 3:53 Overcoming Self-Doubt
• 6:44 Recognizing Achievements
• 10:08 Turning Negative Thoughts Around
• 19:06 Seeking Support and Coaching
• 21:08 Engaging with the Audience
• 22:40 Conclusion and Encouragement

Transcript

 I am Beth Whitworth race car driving quilt making CPA firm owning wife, mom, and boss. I'm here to help you build a business you love by sharing all of the good, the bad, the ugly, and the excellent sides of working in this industry. It's not always easy, but after many years, I can finally say it's worth it.

Let me guide you on your journey to accounting with confidence.

Hi, and welcome to another episode of Accounting with Confidence. I'm your host, Beth Whitworth, and I am here today to talk to you about kind of what happened last week. So this is a little, little off the cuff, but it was something that was really important to me because I saw how this particular. Type of thought pattern impacts so many people.

So many people. So what I'm talking about is this feeling of doing all the things, you know, thinking you're doing all of the things to make your business better, to make yourself better, to be a good person, to do all of the right things, and still feeling like. Imposter. So like a, like a fraud. Like you are telling people to do something, but you aren't necessarily feeling like you're being successful at what you're doing.

And that is how I was feeling last week. It just so happened that I was in a group discussion, a group coaching session as we were getting ready to plan for an event that comes up in November, and so many people felt the same way. Okay, so that's what we're gonna talk about. So let's, let me backtrack.

I've done an episode that revolved around imposter syndrome years and years ago. Years and years. I've only been doing this, not even three, but it felt like years and years ago. It was episode nine, and I went back and kinda looked at what was I talking about? You know, what was I feeling at that time regarding this subject?

And it was. Very different than what I'm feeling right now. It was more in line with not feeling like I should be out here doing a podcast. Should I be doing video? 'cause that's what everybody was encouraging at the time. And well look, here we are. I'm doing video. But it was mu much more in the headspace of, is anybody listening is is what I'm saying, something that anybody wants to hear.

And I got over that pretty quickly. And even in that episode, that was episode nine, and this is episode. 55 in that episode. I said, I love doing this. I love doing the podcast. Now, I have been struggling for the last few weeks in getting ahead of the process, and so you've been getting episodes from me that aren't here, aren't in my.

I call this my studio, but let's be honest, this is my desk, this is my office. This is where I work, but I've, I've recorded one in my car. I recorded one from the event site at Nationals. I recorded one when I was on vacation in Georgia, and that was because I was really not ahead of the process, but I still love doing it, and so I'm still making that effort to.

Even if it's coming out a little late, it is coming out every week and we have had over 20 weekly episodes in a row. So that's something to celebrate in my world. But back to the topic at hand, the imposter syndrome that I was feeling last week was more in relation to my business, and I would like to say that.

Unfortunately, as a woman owned business and for many of women who are entrepreneurs and are in their own business, I think, and I don't have stats and I don't really have any direct reason for saying this, but I think women tend to feel this more than men. And I'm sure it's cultural. I mean it, we have come a long way.

Accounting is no longer a male dominated field, but it was. And so there would be expectation years and years and years, decades ago, was that the man is going to go out and be the breadwinner and they're gonna do the things, they're gonna do the things outside the home. They're going to run the businesses, they're going to manage the businesses, they're gonna do those things.

And while we are. Now more equal in that, where it doesn't matter if you're male, female, doesn't matter you, you are doing your thing, you're running the businesses, you're managing the businesses. You are coming up with new ideas, new inventions, research, whatever, that it's, it's equal. But there, I believe something that's still ingrained in many of us to second guess on whether or not we're doing it right.

Should we be doing it at all. And is it something that is moving us forward? So for me, I tend to second guess that more so than I like to admit. As far as what I'm doing, and I am one who is pushing things to be different in our industry and I'm doing it, we don't keep track of time. We don't bill for time.

We're subscription based. We work with part-time people so we can have a balanced life. We don't have overtime. We just try to do things that are. Different than what the historically typical CPA firm was doing. And when I hear people say, oh wow, I wanna be like you, I immediately have a little bit of a panic attack.

I'm like, Ooh, you don't wanna be like me. You know that I'm not doing anything special. But in the grand scheme of things, I have pushed things pretty far. And even though it's hard for me to see sometimes that I have implemented these changes and I have stood behind them and said, these are our values and this is how we're going to do things, it is hard for me to see the success, the progress.

So let's circle back to last week. So last week I just had a very busy week. That was also one that just, things just didn't. Feel great. You know, you just have an off week, which that when you drop yourself into a course, a, a, a group training session. It was a group coaching session that was reviewing your plans from last year and where you are and are you going to finish them for this year.

That's what we were reviewing that day. And it was a, a, a group of people. I, some I knew, some I didn't know, but you know, probably 40 or 50 people on this call. And we were sharing, you know, where we were. And I immediately was looking and like, I didn't do anything this year. I didn't get anything done. I'm gonna reflect on this and go.

What did I do? Why am I even here? I mean, I, I went there. I, I went straight there and said, okay, because I can't say that I have finished any one of these things. Oh my gosh, what am I even doing? So that was one of those things where I was like, I. Wait a second. How am I even functioning? Why am I doing this?

And it was really hard. I started to like panic and felt that I just felt that energy of feeling panicked. But as I'm sitting there, I'm listening to people who are chiming in. So they're asking for, Hey, where are you? What you grade yourself on? How you did, how you and your team implemented things on a letter grade.

So it was, you know, A, B, C, D. She wasn't gonna accept F's. Okay? So I'm like, I wanted to put a D and I put a C and other people who chimed in, and she's like, let me, you know, why? Why do you think you have a C? And almost every single person that spoke said something along the lines of, well, you know, I feel like I didn't get it all done.

I'm not going to be able to get it all done. Maybe I bit off more than I could chew some things I got done, some things I didn't. I had to pivot. I had personal struggles during the year and these people were sharing all this, and I was like, wow, okay. So I didn't get it all done. I wouldn't say I had any.

Big personal struggles this year. I've had years where I have, and this was not one of them, and so I was really beating myself up on, I just didn't create the plan well enough. I didn't execute the plan. I didn't prioritize the plan. I. Was late in starting all of the things, and then I go back to, okay, well you're using your A DHD as an excuse, which I, I'm not formally diagnosed, but it is, the writing is there on the wall and.

I've lived with it obviously for probably my entire life. Um, it has just gotten to the point where I struggle with getting things done right now, and it could be a combination of all kinds of things. I'm on several medications that can impact. My kind of my, it causes brain fog. I'm having some, you know, issues with some joint pain.

I'm, you know, there's, there's a lot of things I can use and as, as an excuse. But what I did in the moment was immediately go to the, I'm a fraud. I'm out here giving people advice. I am telling them my story of how I overcame things. Here I am. I can't even complete my goals. Okay. So I jumped off that call, which I never do.

I never leave things early, you know, I let the person who's, you know, mediating the call know. I'm like, I gotta go. 'cause the next thing we were gonna do is talk about what you didn't get done. And I'm like, everything. I didn't get anything done. So I go to the extremes. If you know me, I tend to overthink worry.

Enneagram six sixes out there, that's me. So I was just in this state of, oh my gosh, what am I gonna do? Why am I even doing this? What is going on? So get off the call and I am kind of regroup and my coach reaches out to me. She's like, you need to talk. What's going on? I'm like, well, we have an appointment scheduled tomorrow.

We'll just chat about it then, and in the meantime. There was an, the article that because I became, was a top 50 CS practice with Woodard this year. It was the first year. And what they do is they highlight a firm in their, uh, they write an article about you and that had come through in the email earlier in the day, and I hadn't looked at it and I, it needed to proofread it and make sure that that is, I was give them the permission to publish it.

So that was the very next thing I did was read that. And oh my gosh. I was like, we really do all of those things and I'm able to tell people that that's what I do. And they can say, okay, you are recognized for that. And that kind of changed my perspective. So by the time I talked to my coach on Friday and I said, yep, this is where I was, I was panicking over this feeling like I don't belong here.

And she said, okay, let's go through. What did you get done? We went through and it's like, yeah, okay. So yes, all the pieces aren't there, but so many of the pieces are there. So many, and things like having a good client onboarding process, a good team onboarding process, consistently using our tech stack, getting things, you know, we're either.

Putting people in QBO or putting people in zero, but we are no longer putting people in QuickBooks Desktop or Wave or we don't have all these pieces. We're managing that into a standardized process. We are delegating administrative tasks and, uh, making sure that the systems are documented. And so we, we are way further along than I thought, and.

As people who set goals, we have this expectation that we should be able to meet them every time, and we know that we're supposed to set goals that are difficult. If they're too easy, if you're getting it quickly, then it's, I've, I've said it before, if it wasn't hard enough, you need to stretch. Well, apparently I feel like I've set my goals this year as stretch goals, and it doesn't mean I'm not going to get things completed by the end of the year.

We have come a long way, and what I can definitely tell from this entire process and this whole thought pattern that I fall into, and I think many people, especially women, fall into routinely, is that. You have that feeling, I'm an imposter. I don't belong here. I'm a fraud. Why should people listen to me?

Why are people, you know, we have this, this inner monologue that is going, and for me, what I have figured out is that I am faster to flip it. I'm faster to go through the process of saying, wait a second. Turn your inner monologue to something positive, not negative, self-talk positive, and things that happened last week that were positive in that moment of feeling like I didn't belong here.

All of this other stuff went away. All the other stuff I did. So last week, I had to submit to be able to present at scaling New heights. And so I submitted four different presentations, four different sessions, including, you know, a main stage. So that was huge. That was, you know, am I gonna get a main stage?

Who knows? But I did it. I did the process of saying, this is something I wanna do and I'm gonna submit it. That was huge. That was huge. That is not from somebody who thinks that they don't belong, and here I am two days later going, I don't belong here. And it had a lot to do with just like I said, I wasn't having a great week.

I just didn't really feel like I was jumping outta bed going, eh, let me get this done. So I am faster though now, you know? So from Thursday afternoon to Friday afternoon, I had turned it around. I had turned it around and said, wait, I am doing what I wanna be doing. I have moments where I think that maybe I'm not doing everything the best I could.

But it doesn't mean that it's some downward slide to the bottom and I, you know, it's, it's all gone. You know, it's, it's not, it is just when you are having to really struggle to get through your work that day, or you're not doing something that really lights you up, which for me is, I don't, I mean, tax work sometimes tax planning work, you know.

It's exactly what it sounds like. It's not that fun. Um, for some people it's really fun. I'm skilled at it. I can do it, but is it something that lights me up, like talking here and get, you know, giving people just my lessons learned and, and, and. Things that they can take from me and say, yep, I can use that.

Those types of things, you know, that lights me up. Coaching clients into, you know, recognizing things that they can do to help themselves in their business. That lights me up, but reviewing a tax return, entering a tax return, doing some tax planning, that type of stuff doesn't light me up as much. Like I said, I'm skilled at it.

It's part of what we encompass, which is a full service firm, but I would rather be doing other things. So I think I had a a lot of that on my mind. I had a lot of due date things on my mind, a lot of things going overdue, and it just rolled into this just a moment and I'm gonna talk about it, that it was a moment.

It wasn't something that defined me in saying that. If I'm an imposter, I don't belong here. So hopefully this story can help you look at what you are telling yourself. You know what loop is going on in your head that is negative, that is telling yourself that. You don't belong here. You shouldn't be doing this.

And you need to find a person, a thing, something you can go back and look at and say, yeah, I got this. I can look at this award back here. That is the top 50 Cals practice. I didn't get that. It wasn't just an application of, hey, you know, the, the first 50 people who applied get it. There were things that I had to define and encompass and essentially put out there that they had to look at and say, yeah, she's one of the top 50, and this is one of those things that is, you know, top 50 out of, I don't know how many applications they get.

Way more than 50 though. So that was very important to me. And for that article to come out right at that time was one of those things that I needed to look at to say, okay, you know, snap out of it. Stop talking to yourself like this and recognize that you are doing great things and maybe you don't have this award yet, yet, I'm gonna say yet, but you have something.

That reminds you of why you're doing this. Whatever business you're in, it reminds you that you are good at it and that you can do it. And question, are you just having an off week? Are you just having, you know, a moment? And we do. We have those. And if it persists, okay, it's time to really get some help.

And I will always encourage you with your business, get a coach. Get someone who can give you perspective. 'cause when you're living it, when you're working in it, when you are the one who ha feels the pressure, has the responsibilities and starts to get into that loop of. I don't know. I don't know if this is what I should be doing.

This is, am I doing the right thing? Having a coach who understands where you're trying to get to, understands your big picture and can give you perspective in those moments, I found it to be very, very helpful. And it just so happened that I had, you know, a, a coaching appointment scheduled for that very next day and that, that was great.

And if I didn't, I would've scheduled something because. To let it linger and to question it will then impact everything you're doing as you're moving forward, and you're not acting as your best self. So that. Is my story about imposter syndrome and for anyone who might have been on that group coaching call and happens to be listening to this, if you were one of those people who were able to share your story and your, your vulnerability about how you feel about how you're doing on your goals, kudos to you.

I couldn't do it. I could not do it, but. Because you did. I realized I wasn't alone. And I think that's the takeaway here is that none of us are alone in these feelings. And so realize that this is something that is common in whatever area you're in. Whatever you know, whether it's in your hobby, whether it's in your business, whether whatever it is, you know, you're not alone.

People experience this. All the time, so. If you have any ideas of additional topics you would like me to talk about, I would love it if you would let me know If you're receiving my emails, you can respond to an email if you are subscribing and liking wherever you're listening to this. There should be a link that says, send Beth a text.

I would love it if you would send me a text and let me know what else you wanna hear about. I've got some. My eyes are ridiculously watery today. Because my allergies are really bad. But back to leaving me a message, what do you wanna hear about? I have some interviews coming up. If you are got something you wanna talk about and think that this would be a place to do it, lemme know.

I'd love to interview you. I'd love to get to the point where I'm talking to other business owners that. Have gone through similar things or have ideas of how to get past certain things. Like I said, we talk a lot about mindset. We talk a lot about female owned businesses. We talk a lot about leadership and you know, having hard conversations, all those things.

If there's something on your mind and you think that, you know, you want to talk to me about it. Send me a text. I'd love to get more ideas on what you wanna hear about. If you're interested in having any type of of interview, if there's any tech you wanna learn more about, Hey, I'm your girl. If it's accounting related, don't get me into some crazy stuff that I don't know anything about.

So. Okay, that's all I have for this week. I am bound and determined to keep up weekly podcasts through the end of the year for sure, and I feel like my goal is if I can keep it up through the end of the year, it should be no problem keeping it up through the next tax season. So that's my goal. That's why I want you to send me some content.

I want to know what you wanna hear about. 'cause if I know you wanna hear about it, I'll get excited about it and be able to get those recordings done and just be done with it. So, okay, that's all I have for now. Remember, I'm here to empower you to build a business that you love, and I'll talk to you next week.

Thanks for listening to another episode of Accounting with Confidence. My hope is that my experiences can help you navigate the realities of owning and operating your business. Please subscribe or follow the podcast on your favorite podcast listening platform so that you never miss an episode. Feel free to leave me a text by using the, send us a text message link in the show description and let me know how I'm doing.