Emma Smallbone on Autism, Integration, and Parenting with Emotional Awareness

In this powerful episode of The Spiritual Parent, host Carrie Lingenfelter sits down with Emma Smallbone to explore the deep intersections of integration, autism, emotional regulation, parenting, and self-discovery. Emma vulnerably shares her late-in-life autism diagnosis, the disruptive yet healing journey of truly understanding herself, and how body awareness can unlock both emotional regulation and spiritual connection.

Together, Carrie and Emma dive into how parents must model emotional regulation to support their children, the role of trauma stored in the body, and the healing gifts of nature, frequency, and collective consciousness. Whether you’re navigating neurodiversity in your family, seeking tools for healing and spirituality, or looking for ways to create deeper connection with your kids, this conversation offers wisdom, hope, and practical insights.

Tune in to discover why integration is the key to parenting with presence, how frequency and sound can restore balance, and why our bodies hold the truth we’ve been searching for.

Connect with Emma Smallbone:
*Website: http://www.thewildhealing.com
*Instagram: @emmasmallbone @thewildhealingschool
*Facebook: @emmasmallbone

New! Conscious Family Travels Channel on YouTube with Carrie:
https://www.youtube.com/@consciousfamilytravels

Connect with Carrie:
*Website: https://hearttoheartlife.com/
*Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespiritualparent
*YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpiritualParent
*Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/The-Spiritual-Parent/61554482625081
*Email: info@hearttoheartlife.com

**Please remember that the information shared on this podcast is educational in nature and does not constitute licensed mental health advice. If you need such advice, you should speak with a licensed professional about your unique situation. Thanks so much happy listeners.

© 2024-2025 Heart to Heart Life LLC

Transcript

Carrie Lingenfelter (00:02.076)
Hey, I have Emma Smallbone here today. I'm so excited. Emma's here and we were just diving right in Emma because we were talking about integration into our bodies and what does that look like for each of us? You were mentioning like, if a parent is not integrated, how can we expect to connect with our kids? Right? Is that kind of where you were going with it?

Emma (00:17.334)
Yes.

Emma (00:26.144)
You're not going to be able to. Yeah, I mean, my background is I didn't know I had autism my whole entire life and I only just found out at 46 and and when you realize that late in life, it kind of does a number on your whole entire like structure your ecosystem of who you are, how you exist in the world, all of those things.

Carrie Lingenfelter (00:44.836)
Hmm.

Emma (00:53.44)
And for me, it was incredibly disruptive. So as much stability that I had created in my life.

because I had to, because you're kind of forced to create your own thing, because you're not seeing what you need in the world. As soon as I realized that some of the things I was doing was actually harming me and dysregulating me even more, because I was trying to fit in a box I didn't fit in, I started to realize I need to get to know me all over again.

Carrie Lingenfelter (01:10.66)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (01:29.207)
I need to understand what does that mean that I don't understand emotions.

Like as somebody who, to give you some background, I was a professional photographer for 25 years, retired from that because it burnt me out. Then I was a medium and a bestselling author for a decade until that burnt me out. And I have this cycle of hyper focusing, getting really good at what I do, then doing it really well for a prolonged period, and then just essentially dying inside.

and having to re-find myself every single time.

Carrie Lingenfelter (02:09.742)
You've just described it. You've described my life right there. I'm like, huh, this sounds right on. Spot on. Different areas, but totally. Yep.

Emma (02:16.27)
Yeah, and I Yeah, and I am somebody Like when I look at integration everybody thinks about mushrooms they think about like all these psychedelic things I allow

people with divergent minds, whether you're a divergent thinker who just thinks outside the box, you don't actually have to be neurodivergent to want to integrate your experience of the world into your body.

Everybody can do that. And I think this is the part that I get excited about is because I don't think any parent can really parent unless we learn how to regulate our emotions, unless we can connect deeply to our own experience in the world and...

understand what accommodations we need because you know one of the things that took me a really long time to understand is I have an auditory processing disorder. I've had that my entire life. I'm essentially going deaf but I've only been accommodating myself for the last two years.

Carrie Lingenfelter (03:23.928)
Wow.

Emma (03:29.046)
The difference it has made in my life is astounding. My temper is a lot less likely to just go off because I'm not being overstimulated by everything outside of the conversation, inside my head, inside my mouth, inside my body. I can hear everything in my body move.

that's incredibly overstimulating. And when you realize that I'm almost 50 and you're like, my God, I need to learn how to live all over again. And then you start to give yourself grace. Like now this morning is the perfect example of why you have to understand this stuff as an adult.

My husband, of course, scheduled a appointment for our house today right before this, where I had to leave the house with the dogs, with my kid, with my, like, all those things.

Carrie Lingenfelter (04:23.201)
huh huh.

Carrie Lingenfelter (04:28.292)
Woo, transition, big transition.

Emma (04:30.414)
transitions which I'm horrible at so like I was just like okay what is the best way to deal with this today so we even made a plan last night we said we need to be ready to go at nine o'clock we need to have all the dogs things together we need to have a blanket to lay in the park on we need to all of that organization seems really over-the-top but when you

realize how much peace and calm it brings to your life. And the fact that even six months ago, I wouldn't have thought of all those things. I wouldn't have thought to go and get us a couple of Timbits to make the dogs calm down. Because I wasn't even aware of the chaos that was going on in my body.

Carrie Lingenfelter (05:09.934)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (05:21.206)
Right? I didn't realize that taking two dogs and a child would be way overstimulating for me. I didn't realize all of these things. I just thought that was normal things that normal people should be able to do. So I should be able to do it. Well, I can't the same way other people do it because everything is overwhelming. Like

I now wear, if I go out, I put a baseball cap on and it's literally my blinders, right? Like it gives me tunnel vision because as an autistic person, I take in 47 % more. Our kids are taking in 47 % more information in every single way you could possibly imagine.

Carrie Lingenfelter (06:04.782)
Yep.

Emma (06:09.054)
and mine is severe, like that I hear everything. When we don't know that and it's causing this chaos in our body, we're never at just level. We're always, we're starting off peaking, you know?

Carrie Lingenfelter (06:14.35)
Wow.

Carrie Lingenfelter (06:24.536)
Be slain. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (06:29.25)
Yeah, fight, flight or freeze, you wake up there in the morning, right?

Emma (06:33.216)
Yeah, and I, you know, through all of the work that I've done over the years of like, really, I'm that introspective, mystical, autistic, you know, I didn't get the math skills. I didn't get the, you know, I love science. I love learning new things. But my true gift as an autist, I think, is making connections to all the things and being able to explain it in a way that my people understand.

Not necessarily everybody, but like the people that see themselves in me will understand what I'm trying to teach the world. And I think that's one of the things that I constantly am saying to people. Just share your story. It doesn't matter if you think it's polished. It doesn't matter if you think you have it in the perfect words and the perfect format. Just start telling people what's helping you.

Like when I had my big, uncoming, you know, midlife crisis, as they love to call it, but I just think it's, you know, being autistic, honestly, and like waking up to that for a lot of people. Yeah, like being more conscious. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (07:45.506)
waking up conscious, right? Yeah, it's your connection. Yeah.

Emma (07:52.276)
I went to the woods, because I was waking up at three o'clock in the morning, no idea why, you know, it's the witching hour, I've always been into the mystical, I get that, but it was disruptive to my household. So I started going out in the morning and I'm like, well, it's too cold to be outside. Like it was probably around March, February, March that I was starting to do this.

Carrie Lingenfelter (07:59.078)
Mm.

Emma (08:14.168)
I'm like going for a walk just isn't doing it. So I started lighting a fire every single morning out in the woods at three o'clock in the morning. And my partners started to notice that I was so much more calmer. And they would start to say things like, have you been to the woods lately? Have you gone and lit a fire lately?

And I just started to like be curious about why is this calming me? Why is this giving me so much balance in my life? And I

I wasn't judging it. I'd pretty much abandoned all of my spiritual practices at that point because I was kind of having one of those like, you know, I'm done. I've just I've explored everything. I've tried everything. I have no answers. Just I've got to light a fire. And it really started to become that was the thing that was lighting me up.

Carrie Lingenfelter (08:58.789)
Push it all. Yeah, get rid of everything. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (09:13.209)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (09:13.548)
just going and sitting and having a fire. And I'm very much into herbalism and nature, and I would throw some herbs in the fire if I was called to, or I would light a candle, or I would start singing or chanting or doing whatever, specific. I had no structure. And it just became about filling me up.

Carrie Lingenfelter (09:20.239)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (09:31.929)
Yep.

Emma (09:37.954)
what was making me feel good, what was filling my bucket, and no, it didn't look like anybody else's, and that's the piece that I really want people to understand. Nobody needs to get what I do. Nobody needs to follow exactly what I do because my language is my language. I've...

created my practice over a lifetime and I think every single one of us has done the same. We're wiser than we think. Our bodies are way wiser than our minds. Like your body is literally telling you every single day what you need and if you just get quiet enough.

Carrie Lingenfelter (10:14.167)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (10:22.766)
to just hear those whispers, you will actually start to feel it in your body. And that's what I started to do. I'd be out in the forest, I'd be laying there by the fire and I'd be like, oh, my legs really sore in this one spot. Why is it really sore? And I would massage that and all of a sudden I would feel like almost like just a release, kind of like a, you just feel so relaxed. You're like, okay, what was that? And then I got curious.

Carrie Lingenfelter (10:46.639)
Hmm.

Emma (10:52.72)
And I started looking at semantics and I started looking again at more physical movement because that was one thing that I had lost in my life. Being a wedding photographer is a very physical job. And when I did it, I would carry three cameras and I would run for 13 hours. Like you don't stop.

Carrie Lingenfelter (11:15.993)
Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (11:20.761)
The adrenaline too, yeah.

Emma (11:22.314)
yet the adrenaline and that was something that I was lacking in my life. Like becoming an author and then going around and speaking, yeah you're kind of active but you're not really doing the same and I thought yeah I need to get active again. So I've done yoga and this is the other thing that makes me giggle. How many of us have been practicing yoga for over a decade if you think about it?

Carrie Lingenfelter (11:45.957)
Yeah, right. We follow them. Yeah.

Emma (11:46.828)
Right? If you actually think about it, how many times have you been to a yoga class? How many times have you done sun salutations? How many times have you looked to that person to guide you through something that you actually, your body knows how to do it. Like you don't actually need the person that like they're lovely. I've appreciated the teachings, but we can pick one or two of those movements that our body loves.

that when you get into child's pose or when you get into crane pose or tree pose, you just go, this feels good or whatever the activity is. It doesn't have to be yoga. It could be riding your bike. It could be doing anything. But what does your, when your body completely relaxes, when you have that awe moment, what is it you're doing?

Carrie Lingenfelter (12:18.821)
Yep. Yep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (12:25.253)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Emma (12:40.896)
And to me, that's what we have to be chasing. That's the spark. Right?

Carrie Lingenfelter (12:47.087)
Isn't it interesting that we're calling it a midlife crisis? I was actually talking to a friend through text the other day, another podcaster, about we call it a midlife crisis. But for me, it's like a midlife spiritual connection. And it's like we're seeking it because we're at our wit's end. We're exhausted. We're done. My husband's in a corporate job, and he's like,

Emma (13:03.576)
Yeah.

Emma (13:07.629)
Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (13:12.697)
this is not filling my soul. Like I just need to fill my soul. And I was like, well, you're at the, he's like, is this a midlife crisis? Cause he's 41 now. And I'm like, no, it's not. mean, it's not a crisis, but yes, sometimes it's parenting that brings it in for us where we're going to hit our maximum. And that's when we open it up, right? Nothing else has worked for me. So, and we just express it and figure out what is it that makes me find my flow.

Emma (13:15.799)
Yeah.

Emma (13:22.05)
Yeah.

No.

Emma (13:29.518)
Yeah.

Emma (13:34.722)
Yeah. Nope.

Carrie Lingenfelter (13:42.457)
What is it that makes me connect with my heart? And if we're not there, how can we be the best parent? Or not best, but how can we truly connect with our kids if we can't connect with ourselves?

Emma (13:42.818)
Yes.

Emma (13:49.24)
Yeah.

Emma (13:53.774)
Exactly. And this is the other thing where we're telling our kids what to do, but we're not able to do it ourselves. So like, you know, I have like, this is how hard I work. I have about like eight different journals every day and I have one just for emotions. I have one to strategize and plan my week. I have one just for like to do my info dump. It's not something that you do just

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:00.366)
You

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:18.873)
Yes.

Emma (14:23.568)
easily like and and it is the frustrating part like I you know I had I do want to pat myself on the back I had my very last EMDR session this week and that felt like a huge

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:25.444)
Mm-mm.

Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:34.755)
Wow, congrats.

Emma (14:38.968)
kind of success moving from trauma therapy into like, know, actionable doing the things that can like soothe it. And you know, people say, why are you in trauma therapy? For being autistic. Like, I don't think people understand how traumatizing society is in general for autistic people. And this is something I talk about all the time. If you have a child on the spectrum, you are more

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:48.271)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (14:52.389)
Hmm, yep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (15:01.125)
Hmm.

Emma (15:08.912)
More than likely, there's a 50 % chance that you're somewhere on that spectrum.

And when we're so stressed about why can't our kid, you know, figure it out or why can't I figure it out for my kid? We're projecting all of that pain, all of that anxiety, all of that stress. Because like what happened to me was my kid went through a traumatizing experience at school. It triggered my childhood trauma at school. And then all of that came out. It got dumped on my kid.

Carrie Lingenfelter (15:24.389)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (15:43.577)
Yeah.

Emma (15:44.8)
it got dumped on my husband, it got dumped all over our whole entire family mess. And that is because I didn't know I had autism. And I didn't realize that when my kid was gonna go through the exact same thing I went through as a kid, it was gonna bring up all this stuff. And we have to be stable. We can't be the moving target, right?

Carrie Lingenfelter (15:50.138)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (15:54.127)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (16:04.122)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (16:09.99)
For sure. Yeah, we're their anchor, right? We're their grounding cord. Yeah.

Emma (16:13.902)
So, yes. And that's why I think we have to start with the parents. know, as much as we're trying to teach our kid all of these tools, if we're not taking them on first and foremost, we're not embodying it. We're not creating that muscle memory in our own body. It's never gonna happen in the family system.

Carrie Lingenfelter (16:21.712)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (16:41.062)
I have a question for you. You once had mentioned to me, and this might throw you because it's random, that you do all of this work and all of these grounding pieces and activities for yourself to get there. And I think you had said, even with all of that, you're only integrated into, like your spirit is only in your body 60 % of the time. Does that sound familiar? I was curious about that because I was always the kid that was checked out in school.

Emma (16:42.85)
Yeah.

Emma (17:03.552)
Yes. So it...

Carrie Lingenfelter (17:09.082)
My mom called it out of body experience and I'm like, out of what? was not, I was in my body mom, but I was just checked out.

Emma (17:15.604)
You are and I it was funny because right before you logged on I was like I don't know if I'm gonna be in my body enough for this one like but as soon as I see somebody's eyes I connect right I

Carrie Lingenfelter (17:23.814)
I'm having a hard time today.

Emma (17:29.838)
I'm only just starting to understand truly how much I have been outside of my body my entire life. I, you know, there's a lot of things where I'm like, okay, I know that's my body. And I know that I'm here.

But my brain is like a million miles away and it's having six conversations. And like this morning, I don't know if you know, there's a lot of opinions about the telepathy tapes, but I have all sorts of connections in the collective to lots of different individuals. And you know, there's this huge conversation about the hill and how do you get there and da, da, da.

Carrie Lingenfelter (17:53.638)
Hmm. Mm-hmm.

Emma (18:19.608)
For the people that have been doing this their entire lives, we are just in the hell. Like, I am just there all the time. And that's one of the things that I'm kind of laughing at about all of this, because people are like, well, how do you get there? How do you? And I'm like...

It's just something you have to do. Like it's not, it's not something you talk about. It's not something you think about. You're just literally, you know, what I do is I have a couple of people that have been really deep connections. We call it the, the worldwide autistic web because we literally just have to think about the person and then they send us the information that we need. And it may be in a book, it may be in an actual person.

Carrie Lingenfelter (19:01.638)
I it.

Emma (19:06.572)
or a connection and you no longer actually act like I don't need for those connections to be forced anymore because now I just go, yeah, like what do I need from the web? And when you actually just go, okay, yes, I know somebody is gonna answer because they always answer. Like you just kind of open it up. It just happens. And I think...

Carrie Lingenfelter (19:19.942)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (19:29.84)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (19:35.31)
The one piece that people get really frustrated with is they either think it's like a a pill you take or a button you push or like, oh, I'm going to the head. And it's like, no, it's a practice. Right. Like I work really, really hard. And people are like, my husband's like, well, you don't look like you're working very hard. Like you're having lots of fun. And like I use this balance board a lot.

Carrie Lingenfelter (20:02.96)
Hmm, interesting.

Emma (20:05.454)
So this is where I channel and I kind of get out a lot of the stuff that comes into my head that I don't understand. in here, this part right here, there's all this code. Like when I get really close, I can see dots and dashes and lines and things. And I don't necessarily 100 % know what that means, but my body does.

And when I receive some information, it goes, okay, that's all you needed. And I move on.

It's a different way of communicating and it's kind of where people are struggling right now. I think people want autistic communication to look like neurotypical communication and it doesn't like in that sense in that disconnected in the that day and dream world the collective consciousness it communication doesn't work the same way and you know for parents that's kind of

Carrie Lingenfelter (21:05.744)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (21:08.48)
What I want them to understand is the more you connect with your body and understand the messages because it's it's literally I look at that code I feel something in my body and I go. Yeah, okay, and then I Can do the thing I need to do I have more confidence I You know can trust that some of the choices I have made will be right

Carrie Lingenfelter (21:36.838)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (21:37.73)
but this is not something you can teach somebody. Like I can't, know, like let me show you what I mean. Like this is literally what I do.

Emma (22:04.6)
see, like the board connects me with my body because I'm thinking about how to the balance board. So I have to be in my body. And when I'm in my body, I can see more in that. And that is hard for people to understand and how then do you take this and help your kids?

Carrie Lingenfelter (22:13.134)
on sport. Yep. Yep. Yep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (22:23.622)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (22:33.448)
If their body is active, they will be able to communicate. If it's activated, if they're like literally understanding their body and how it feels. And it's why nonverbal autistic kids struggle with communicating because they're not connected to their bodies. They're the extreme of the daydreaming, right?

Carrie Lingenfelter (22:58.84)
outside. Yeah. Yeah. Yup.

Emma (23:02.606)
And I'm able to be in both worlds. Like I'm able to be like, okay, because I've been working like my whole entire life. I never stopped doing it. So it's like this muscle that you want me to go. Okay, I'll go. Like what do you like all of those things. But again, how do you spark bring joy? How do you feel peace in your body?

Carrie Lingenfelter (23:05.978)
Hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (23:09.69)
Yeah. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (23:17.446)
Yep.

Emma (23:31.156)
If you can't feel peace and calm, if you can't sit still long enough to actually go, wait a second.

Emma (23:44.876)
my shoulders are really friggin tight, right? And then you notice a little bit and then it's like, wait a second, why am I holding this in my thighs? Why is there pain in my knee? And when you actually start listening to those pieces of our body, they're correlated to emotions that we're holding on to. You know, if you do any looking into trauma,

Carrie Lingenfelter (23:47.93)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (23:55.92)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Emma (24:12.332)
The truth is held in our joints. The pain and trauma is held in our body. And for me, when I went through that nervous breakdown, it was all of the trauma releasing from my body.

Carrie Lingenfelter (24:15.323)
Yes.

Carrie Lingenfelter (24:28.177)
Mm-hmm.

Emma (24:28.32)
and I was in so much pain at one point that I could barely even like sit. just, everything felt like I was in so much pain. And I just kept trying to push the pain away, push the pain away. Every doctor you go to says, know, here's some painkillers, here's this remedy, here's that remedy. And eventually I got to this point where I'm like, well, it's not going away. Like.

Carrie Lingenfelter (24:35.793)
Wow.

Carrie Lingenfelter (24:48.443)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (24:53.788)
Oof.

Emma (24:55.028)
So I got to face this and I started facing what the pain was and it's from not being heard as an autistic person. You were too emotional, you're too loud, you're too this, why do you care about all of this? Focus on math and English and I don't care about math. don't even, like, don't tell my, I don't care about math.

Carrie Lingenfelter (25:11.291)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Emma (25:16.942)
Like I don't care about any of the things that normal people care about. I care about helping people feel good in their bodies so they can have a better life so we can enjoy this life we've been given. Go ahead, because I will go.

Carrie Lingenfelter (25:21.403)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (25:28.529)
Yep.

OK. sorry. I was going say, I have one final question I wanted to ask you before I run out of time. And I think it goes along with this, because I have the spiritual side of me that has really helped my kids to connect with their selves and have that flow. And part of this, it's really heavy on me, because I'm like, Emma said.

Emma (25:38.262)
Yeah!

Emma (25:46.253)
Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (25:58.78)
The thing that she doesn't like about the spiritual side is that we're looking at some of these pieces for kids who are either autistic or ADHD or neurodiverse or highly sensitive or gifted. There's so many different aspects that people can be born with, right? Right now, if we're looking at those pieces as like those heightened sensitivities or those extra connections,

Emma (26:14.22)
Yep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (26:25.787)
And I'm trying to think of how to word it, but I'm trying to help empower my kids right now. I'm trying to help them stay connected, not feed into the anxiety, not feed into society's box of perfection that they want them to be in, right? All of these pieces, how do we, how do we, because I call them superpowers, right? We're trying to put a positive piece on it, but you're like, but it's also so hard to, right? Yes.

Emma (26:30.669)
Yeah.

Emma (26:39.575)
Yeah.

Emma (26:46.35)
Yeah. This is it is the part that I struggle with because you tell kids that this is their superpower and they're in it.

and they're struggling and they're going, well, I don't feel like this is a superpower. And to be honest, I will tell you, like I'm Audi HD. It's the worst combination because I have a brilliant mind, but I can't process fast enough to convey that information in the way that I need to do it, in the way society needs it.

Carrie Lingenfelter (27:00.039)
Mm-hmm. Right.

Carrie Lingenfelter (27:06.309)
It hard, really hard. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (27:16.005)
Mm-hmm. Yes. Yep.

Emma (27:21.888)
So I can wax on for I could talk to you for eight hours about all and I would not stop And I would have so much joy out of it Because I know that's what i've been put here on earth to do is share this knowledge with people So we can all just enjoy a little bit of life because that's what we deserve You know being an autistic is hard. We feel everything the shuman resonance has been spiking like crazy And it over stimulates us

Carrie Lingenfelter (27:31.388)
same.

Emma (27:51.744)
tenfold and it's on this pattern where we just had some reprieve and now it's come back and like I can feel it in my sinuses and I can feel it in my teeth and our kids are feeling this on top of already feeling like they're kind of outside of society so I just say to people how can you

Carrie Lingenfelter (28:01.297)
Yes. Yes.

Emma (28:15.538)
Make your little tiny family unit happy. It doesn't matter about how anybody else sees it. I do some kooky stuff. I have to drum in the morning. I have to chant. The vibration of the chanting for me releases my sinuses. I do a lot of lymph drainage massage because I'm an older undiagnosed for so long. My drainage system does not work. So I constantly

Carrie Lingenfelter (28:19.399)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (28:27.249)
love it.

Carrie Lingenfelter (28:32.443)
Mmm.

Emma (28:45.452)
have to work on my lymph system to get it going. It's about learning about those things. How can we help our bodies be in the world that we're in and not force ourselves to process this world like neurotypicals? Find what works for you. Like I have...

weighted plushies everywhere. have the softest blankets. I have like every single squishy toy you could imagine. And I don't care. You know, everybody used to be like, well, are you afraid of being autistic out? When I first started wearing my headphones,

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:13.159)
Mm-hmm. Yep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:20.155)
Yes.

Emma (29:30.088)
I couldn't believe how many people gave me pushback and now I wear them everywhere because I want kids to feel comfortable wearing their headphones.

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:33.991)
Mmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:40.165)
Yes.

Emma (29:40.75)
And I don't want adults to be like, you're ignoring. No, I'm not. I can hear you perfectly fine. This is just canceling out the rest of the world so I can actually hear you speak. you know, and saying things like that in public, in front of our children, not being afraid to carry a stuffy to the movies because it makes you feel comfortable in a public space. Because if you want your kid to feel comfortable enough,

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:52.881)
Yes.

Carrie Lingenfelter (29:59.933)
Yes.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:04.231)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:07.943)
Yeah.

Emma (30:10.634)
to do that. You have to do it yourself. If you want your kid to wear headphones, then wear headphones and and go out with them and say, hey, if you're if you want to go to a concert, but it hurts your ears, I'll wear my headphones too, right? Because I can't go to a concert. I used to go to concerts all the time, but I'm so burnt out now. I can't do it anymore, but I would. It's a lot, but I would love for my kid to go to Comic Con.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:14.097)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:24.508)
Yes.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:34.661)
It's a lot. Intensity. Yes.

Emma (30:40.372)
So I do this so he gets the confidence to wear his headphones when he goes to Comic-Con, right? We have to be what we want for our kids. We can't just tell our kids you have to do this. Like that's the part that... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:45.703)
Yup. Yup.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:54.299)
Yes.

Carrie Lingenfelter (30:58.727)
Yep, you're groundbreaking. You do it. You go. But you have to be the example. Totally, 100%. We're like on this groundbreaking. feel like humanity is vibrating and wanting to do it. Like it's coming. We're getting our feet wet. And these kids are coming louder and louder. So we really jump in. I love it. Yeah.

Emma (31:11.566)
Yes. Yes. Yes.

We have to and I've seen probably about three cycles of this now like of awakening and people becoming more like, yeah, like the amount of people that understand frequency is healing now compared to when I first started doing this work is crazy. And for these kids frequency is huge. If you can get them some binaural beats, if you can get them like vibratory, I have the headphones that vibrate the deep

Carrie Lingenfelter (31:24.167)
Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (31:47.168)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, I love it. Yeah.

Emma (31:48.062)
base. my god, you put on the Schumann resonance thing right now, their bodies just melt into the ground. Like, come on, why aren't we allowing our kids these tools that are so easy and free, most of it? Go on YouTube, right?

Carrie Lingenfelter (32:03.398)
I love it. Yeah. YouTube, so Flegio frequency is for what chakra you're needing. had the root chakra on this morning on YouTube that was vibrating for us. I was like, let's ground, let's get in. My son woke up. He's like, mom. I'm like, whoa, OK, we're turning on the red. We're getting in there. And I'm going to need to get one of those drums because I was being called to it as well in the morning.

Emma (32:08.311)
Yes!

Emma (32:13.102)
Yeah

Emma (32:24.802)
Yes. So I will tell you, I turn the drum on myself, if you've ever watched me drum, and I actually take the vibration from the drum, and it really helps because it hits your pineal gland, right? And I took a neurobiology class so I could understand my brain a little bit more.

Carrie Lingenfelter (32:40.348)
Yup, yup.

Carrie Lingenfelter (32:45.704)
bit.

Emma (32:46.082)
But as autistic individuals, our brains don't defrag the hard drive like neurotypical brains do. So it's why I'm huge into lymph drainage because our brains don't naturally drain all the toxins. They don't do the pruning that a neurotypical brain does. So we have to literally do that for ourselves. we don't, yeah, we don't get the deep sleep.

Carrie Lingenfelter (32:53.168)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Carrie Lingenfelter (33:08.936)
Interesting.

Carrie Lingenfelter (33:13.32)
Where?

Emma (33:16.066)
We have to use 5-HTP, I can't remember all the things. We need those because our brain doesn't create melatonin. It doesn't create serotonin. we're start, and that's why I talk about a fire, because we start out with embers, right? And then we have to pile all this stuff on top of it, our fuel, just to get started in the morning.

Carrie Lingenfelter (33:34.664)
Yep. Yep.

Emma (33:43.328)
So that's what people need to look at it like is how do you start your fire in the morning? And if you're not, if you don't have the fuel, if you don't have the rest, if you don't have the hydration, if you don't have the things you need, you're never gonna get to that burning bright, know, roaring fire stage where you feel propelled by the energy.

Carrie Lingenfelter (33:56.412)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Emma (34:08.13)
We always tend to be at this place where we're like desperately trying to refuel the fire to get normalcy, right? And yeah.

Carrie Lingenfelter (34:13.928)
Yeah, yeah, out of desperation as an adult. Mm-hmm, yep, yep. I love it. There's so much. We could talk for eight hours, Emma. I'm like, there's more coming in. OK. Thank you so much for connecting with us. And I'm so excited to share this with everyone. we'll have all of, yeah.

Emma (34:24.014)
I know.

Emma (34:33.27)
You're so welcome. Yeah, I'm more than happy. Anytime, and it's really easy to find me. You just have to Google Emma Smallbone. There's only one of me. It goes directly to all my websites. So find me. That would be great.

Carrie Lingenfelter (34:47.08)
Perfect and I'll link your websites and all your info that so they can follow you as well. Thanks so much Emma

Emma (34:53.036)
Yeah, I appreciate it. Thank you.