From Overwhelm to Alignment

A life update, a brand launch, and a real conversation about overwhelm. In this episode, I talk about why doing more isn’t always the answer, how mental capacity plays a bigger role than we think, and the shift that’s helped me move forward with more clarity and less chaos… although let’s be honest, there’s still plenty of chaos because it is, in fact, my middle name. Plus a little update on my current mystery man era....

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello and welcome back to Ambitiously Chaotic. It has been a few weeks since I last sat down to record because honestly, a lot has been happening behind the scenes. The biggest one being that I have just launched our new fitness business brand, Your Form, which is incredibly exciting. It's been very chaotic, to say the least, in true Danny fashion. Um, but it's been very exciting, and the rebrand is very reflective of where I'm at right now, and that's kind of one of the things I want to speak about today. Not just the launch itself, but the shift in myself and the shift behind it all. And if I'm honest, the last few weeks have also felt quite full mentally and emotionally, and quite frankly, a bit overwhelming to say the least at times. Um there's so much going on behind the scenes, and if you follow me on Instagram, there's also something else, something else that's going on, which if you care to continue listening, I might talk about it. I might talk about it. If you follow me, you'll know what I'm talking about. If you don't follow me, then you're just gonna have to listen to find out what on earth I'm speaking about here. Um, but I kind of want to delve into how I've been managing my energy, my stress, and my capacity, um, because it's made me realise that I think this is something we a lot of us fall into. It's it's the belief that when things feel overwhelming and when we've got so much to do, the answer is just to do more. The answer is to work harder, to push more, to add more stress and more to our mental capacity when the reality is that it's usually the exact opposite of what we need. What we really need is to slow down and to actually pause and check in with ourselves and do less. Um, so today's episode is a little bit of a life update, a bit of behind the scenes of the launch and the the other extra little thing, and just a conversation about stress, overwhelm, and why doing more isn't always the answer. Okay, so first things first, I want to talk a little bit about our new brand, your form, because oh my god, I cannot tell you how good it feels to have it out there. Like this new brand, launching this new brand, it's just representative of a lot, you know. Like the old brand, my old fitness business brand in PowerXL, it represented who I was at that time, you know, and I I had to I just knew I needed to change it because the old brand didn't feel like me anymore, and I felt like I associated so much of that brand to the old me, to my old life, and it just didn't feel aligned anymore. And you know, when you're not living in alignment, you just you just feel like something's off, and I was like, This this needs to change. So to have this new brand out there now and to have let go of the old brand, it feels like a massive weight has been lifted from my shoulder. I can't even tell you. And to be honest, I now feel like I can properly and officially start this next chapter of my life, which I feel like I've been somewhat, you know, moving into almost like dipping my toe in the water of it, but not fully stepping into. Um, and the way I kind of explained it before is I felt like I was like this is very deep, standing at the edge of a cliff, ready to leap onto the other side, this new chapter, but the old me was like hanging on. The old me was like hanging on, being like, no, stay here. That's what it's felt like. Whereas now I feel like I'm on the other side of that cliff, and I feel like I've leaped across, and it feels really fucking good. Um, and this brand just feels so much more aligned with me, with who I am now, with where I'm at in my life, all that I've learned. It's it's not it's not just been a business change, it really does reflect a huge personal shift for me as well. It's a massive reflection on how much I've changed over the years, and it just means a lot, and it just feels so good to be out there, and just to have something that feels really aligned with you know myself, uh the fitness business, like our whole ethos and the direction that we want to take things, it just feels so aligned, and true alignment genuinely is the most euphoric feeling, like when you if you've ever lived in true alignment with your core values, like there's no better feeling, and I don't feel like a lot of people maybe know what I'm talking about here because it's very in-depth, but because I'm so self-aware, right? And I always bang on about this to clients. I actually just had a call with a client, we were talking about this, and she was saying she's in that phase right now where she is living in true alignment and it feels really fucking great, and because she's so self-aware as well, I was saying to her, like, self-awareness is a superpower, it really is, and we all have the power to tap into our self-awareness and look inward, but not everyone does it because it can be quite uncomfortable at times. But when you have that self-awareness, that that superpower, you're able to understand, you know, what's important to you in life, why you are triggered by certain things, why you act in certain ways, what feels good, what doesn't, yada yada right. But you you start to really become aware of what is really important in your life and what you really want to focus on, and what makes you really feel like you, and what makes you feel comfortable enough to be you, and also what just really truly fulfills you on a day-to-day basis, and you start to do more of those things, and it's when you live in true alignment with your core values, whatever they may be, that is as close to happiness as you can possibly get. It's a true, it's a true fact. So because I'm so aware of what my core values are and I've been acting in line with those more frequently, I've been in that state of almost like like that euphoric state, you know, because I've been living in line with my core values, and it just feels it just feels amazing, it just feels so good. And I honestly wish I could box up this feeling and like pass it on to people because I'm like, I need you to experience this, like this is what alignment feels like, and it doesn't mean that you know everything in life is going great and you don't have any stresses and no problems. Fuck no, my god, we all have we all have shit going on, don't get me wrong, but it it just feels you just know you're everything's gonna be okay, is the only way I can explain it. Like you know, if you are living in true alignment with who you are, the direction you want to go in, your core values, you you you have this trust, this deep self-trust that you're you're right where you need to be, and no matter what stressors are going on in life, it's all gonna work out because you're living in alignment. So, yeah, I just need everyone to experience what that feels like, and yeah, launching the business is one of those things, and it's done so much for me just in the last couple of weeks, but let me tell you, it has been a very busy time, so the week leading up to the rebrand on true Danny Fashion, hence the name of the podcast, because so ambitious but so chaotic, it's literally my middle name. I was so underprepared, I was so prepared for some things and so underprepared but other things, and we had our um client photo shoot the literally the weekend before the launch, and there was just so many things I hadn't done that I had to do that weekend at the shoot to prepare for it. Like, I shit you not. We Sophie and I had to record the launch video at the shoot on the Saturday and then edit it ourselves on the Sunday morning. You have no idea how long that took and how much brain power that took. So I'm so glad it got so well received because I was like, see if it doesn't fucking hell. This has taken up so much of my mental capacity. Like afterwards, Sophie and I were like, I have no brain cells left, like I cannot, I can't look at a phone screen anymore. Like, my brain is just not working. Um, so it was really very last minute, and you know, you have an idea in your head and you're like, it's gonna be fine, and then you're like, fuck, it's tomorrow, I have to I have to do this shit. Um so yeah, it got done, and yeah, here we are. But it was very, very busy, and obviously the photo shoot was amazing with our girls. But the following week, um, I was floored, understandably floored, and I went to the gym on the Tuesday, so the the our client shoot was on the weekend, we rebranded on the Monday the announcement, and then Tuesday I went to the gym and I was like, I cannot lift a fucking thing, and I was just goosed. So um me and Coach decided that actually it was a very wise idea to take the week off the gym as a bit of a D-load and just to um kind of yeah, gain my energy back. Um, and I think this is where a lot of people tend to actually do the opposite, you know, when when we're stressed, when we're overwhelmed, when our mental capacity is completely full, and you have all these tabs open in your brain, you're trying to juggle a million and one things, and you just feel like you can never get on top of things, a lot of the time the mistake people make is actually giving themselves more to do. When the reality is, when you're at full capacity, your energy battery is at like 20%, you're just adding to that, you're not you're not increasing your energy, you're not making it any better, you're actually making it worse. So, what we really need to look at doing is actually stripping things back and doing less. And I think, in all honesty, and I'm speaking from experience here because I used to do the same, a lot of people struggle to slow down because they have this fear that if they slow down, things are all gonna go to pot. And I used to be that person, I used to be the person that would work herself to the ground late nights, weekends, never take a day off. Because I had a fear that if I didn't something would crumble, like the business would crumble, or I wouldn't, you know, be able to do all the things I needed to do. Like I had to get on top of everything, like before it was even due. And now honestly, I am I'm honestly the opposite, and it's it's it's mad how opposite I am to the point where someone actually said to me the other day, like, you are so chilled, it's unbelievable. And I'm like, it's mad to hear someone say that because as a person I am I'm not chill, like I am very like obviously chaotic and I have the energy of a fucking two-year-old, but like when it comes to like getting things done, like I'll always get stuff done, but like certain things that used to really stress me, they just don't anymore, or they'll they will last minute, but like not in the same way, it's just I'm just so blasy about things, and it's just so wild how I've gone from one way to the complete opposite way, obviously in a matter of years, but it's mad how much how much can change. Um and yeah, I think a lot of people are afraid to do less, are afraid to take a step back from whatever it may be, you know, whether it's work, whether it's training, whether it's socializing, like, and I think this is where self-awareness is is really a superpower because you start to recognize the signs before you reach burnout, and it's that's that is a superpower because if you've ever had burnout before, it really fucking sucks. It really, really sucks, it's not a fun thing to have, and it lingers, it lingers for a long time if you don't catch it before it happens. So it's um it does really work in your favour to be self-aware and recognise the signs, recognise the red flags before, or the orange flags before they become red flags, you know, going from orange to green instead of orange to red. I think it's it is so so important. Um so yeah, I think if you're one of these people who struggles with stress, overwhelm, anxiety, and you're constantly doing all the time, just pause for a second and like ask yourself, like, what is the fear? Like, what are you afraid of doing? Like, why are you afraid of doing so much? Like, what is the fear if you were to step back and do less, or to take a day off, or to say no to plans, or to take a week off the gym, or whatever it is, what is the fear there? What are you afraid of? And just just challenge yourself, just challenge yourself to do less. Just notice what it does for your mental capacity and your overall energy, because it really does have a profound effect on you know your mood, your focus, your productivity, your sleep quality, your interactions with other people as well, and also quite frankly, your relationship with yourself, it really does, and that's one of the things that has changed changed drastically for me in the last few years, um, one of the many, but that is that has been a real drastic change. And I'm now someone that actually works more efficiently for a shorter time frame, so I'll get more done in like four hours than I used to in like a whole day's work, like eight hours, and it's just because I I know now how to protect my energy and I take more time off, and I'm a lot more present in my day-to-day life, and that has had such a positive impact, and of course, it's improved my relationship with myself, but also my family, my friends, massively, and quite frankly, I have more mental capacity for other things and other people, which honestly I didn't before. Um, I didn't have the mental capacity for more because I was so like consumed by not just obviously work stuff and doing all the time, but also the unhappiness that I was feeling in my personal life at the time. It was a kind of a form of avoidance for me to to work more, to do more. Um, and I kind of isolated myself from my friends and family. Like, I remember getting a message from my mum being like, Hey hun, just checking in, I haven't heard from you in like two weeks, and I'm like, What? Has it been that long? Like, that's terrible. Like, I speak to my mum and dad all the time, and I was like, That is so bad. Like, Danny, you need to really sort your shit out. Whereas now, and my friends even said to me like a few months ago, like, it's so nice to have you back, and I was like, that actually makes me emotional, you know. Like, it's a few people have said to me, It's so nice to have you back, like you seem so happy, you're you're glowing, and you're you're more interactive with us again, we're seeing you more often, like you're just back to your old self, and I'm like, what a compliment that is, truly, like what a compliment that is, and it just showed me how how lost I truly was, and how exhausted I was, and how low of a mental or how how high I guess my mental capacity was, it was at its peak, like I had no room for anything else, like my mental capacity was completely full, completely full. Um and yeah, it's just so nice to hear when like people say that, and I feel like I'm just such a different person. I just yeah, I I honestly I can't I can't even explain, it's just wild. And anyone who's been through like a massive life change or identity shift, I know you'll get it, but I I genuinely I talk about this a lot because I generally don't feel like enough people speak about it because it might sound like oh woo woo, okay, like how have you changed? You're the same person, like so a lot of people don't kind of believe in this kind of stuff, and that's fine if it's not for you, it's not for you, but you've obviously not experienced it before. Because if you have you would welcome the chat, do you know? But anyway, just going back to the whole kind of mental capacity thing. I genuinely believe that doing more isn't always the answer. Now, don't get me wrong, there's a time and a place for doing more, there really is, of course there is, but you can still be doing a lot in your most efficient way, like everyone works differently, right? But reduce the noise, prioritize things properly in a way that works for you. Check in with yourself regularly. That's something I say to my clients all the time, and something that I now do like check in with yourself. How are you feeling? How are you feeling in your body? Are you feeling heightened? Are you feeling stressed? Are you feeling calm? Like, what do you need in this moment? It's so easy in this day and age to just be an autopilot all the time, and our cortisol level levels are through the fucking roof, and that's just our norm. That's not healthy. By the way, that's not healthy, you know. So, like, what can you do to regulate yourself to keep yourself calm and move with ease instead of moving so fast paced and out of fear? What can you do? Do more of that, do more of the things that make you slow down, make you pause, you know, like the things that probably right now feel really uncomfortable to you, but that's usually a sign that you need to do them, quite frankly. And I know it's easier said than done, like, especially if you juggle a lot, you know, if you've got a hectic job, or maybe you have two jobs, you have kids, you've got family to look after. Like, it's easy for someone to say, Oh, yeah, just take five minutes for yourself, or go for a walk, or do this, and you're like, when the fuck do I have time for that? But you've just got to find time in your own in your own way. It might not be anything drastic, it might literally be two minutes of your day, you know, when you get a breather from the kids and you're in the bathroom, whatever it is, and you just close your eyes and you just focus on your breath to calm calm yourself down, like whatever it is, find those small pockets because they they do make such a profound difference. And I genuinely again I'm gonna bang on about this till the cows come home because I've experienced it firsthand multiple times. The more calm and regulated you are, the more abundance you bring into your life, and the more happy you feel. Genuinely, it's so so true, and it's that that state of abundance is like the highest frequency you can kind of project out into the universe. And actually, I was listening to a Joe Dispenser um podcast yesterday, which is phenomenal, and he was talking about how um you know, in order to achieve a certain thing, you have to feel that certain state first. So if you want to um, let's say, for instance, if you want to gain more abundance, you have to feel abundant in yourself first. If you want to gain more love, you have to prioritize feeling love within yourself first. Because if you don't, you're then essentially operating from a place of lack, and that's that's projecting out into the universe that you don't already have that thing, so you're almost creating a kind of a barrier as such, you're creating a resistance there between you and the thing that you want. Whereas if you if you're already acting and embodying, essentially, that's the key word here, is you're already embodying that you already have that, then you've raised your frequency, and energy frequency is a thing, it really is. Everything in this world is energy, and whether you realize it or not, the frequency that you're operating on has an impact on what you attract back to you. That's how powerful our state is. That's how powerful, that's how powerful really that we as humans are to go really deep with it. We are really freaking powerful, and our minds are powerful things, our our energy is is a powerful thing, and if you can really learn to tap into that, that's really where the true power lies. Anyway, I feel like I've gone off on a tangent, but I hope that makes sense. Um the other thing I want to I'm gonna talk about it. Do you know what? I'm gonna talk about it because I just think it's I I'm gonna milk this as long as I can, guys. I'm not gonna lie. I'm absolutely gonna milk it as long as I can because my story views have gone through the roof. I've got lots of nosy people, and I'm so here for it. I'm so here for it because if it were me following someone, I would also be doing the exact same thing, so I get it, I get it. Um but there's a new mystery man, and I know that he's gonna absolutely be listening to this, so you enjoy it, you enjoy it, hun, you enjoy it. But um, I posted a kind of sneaky picture that didn't show who the mystery man was, hence the mystery man. Uh the amount of mess. That I got hilarious, absolutely hilarious. Um, and obviously, like my friends and family know, but um followers not so much, and yeah, it's just it's so it's so funny like seeing people's messages being like, What who is this? Tell me more, and I'm like, I'm just gonna keep it a little bit secret. Um, but obviously he has had a really massive impact on how happy I now am as well. And I know he's gonna be listening, so this is kind of cringe, but he he really has, and the last few months since the start of the year, really, have been pretty, pretty amazing to say the least, and you know it's the year of the horse, and obviously the year of the horse is things moving really quickly. Fuck that's happened to me, let me tell you, but in the best way possible. Um, so yeah, that's all you're getting. That's all you're getting for now. Hashtag mystery man reveal yourself, but in time, you're gonna have to follow along on my Instagram if you don't already to find out more because yeah, eventually there will be the big reveal, but for now, we're gonna have a little bit of fun with it. I'm not gonna lie, I'm not gonna lie, so so that's all you're getting for now. But this is what one of the things I was talking about last week. Like, this is also where it's so important to surround yourself with the right people, and you notice such a shift in yourself and how you feel day to day when you're surrounded by the right people. And I even had this conversation with my client earlier, you know, and she she was at our photo shoot the other weekend, and she even said the same. She's like, My god, it makes such a difference when you are around the right people who just support you, who lift you up, who share the same values, have the same interests, and just it just does wonders for your energy, your confidence, your belief, your happiness. Um, and it's so true, and it's so so true. Like, and when you're around people who who don't bring out that side in you who maybe don't align, again, you really notice the shift in and how you feel, your energy is lower, your mood is perhaps lower, and you just feel a bit meh, you know. Um so all I'm trying to say is you know, surround yourself with the right people and pay attention to how those people make you feel after you've left them. Because I truly believe like there are genuinely a lot of people in this world who are human sunshine and they just lift you up and make you feel like a completely better version of yourself. And I'd like to think that I'm one of those people, I've been told that before, but I would like to think I'm one of those people, and that is that honestly, that's the the impact that I I want to have on people, and you know, because I think you know, leave people feeling better than when you first you first saw them, like let them feel elevated, let them feel energized, you know. Um so anyway, I've gone off on a massive tangent, but just to bring it back full circle to the new brand that reflects the new me, the new mindset, my new chapter as such. Um and just yeah, just living in true alignment, it just feels amazing, and I want you all to experience what that feels like. And one of the first steps in doing that is recognizing when you are at full capacity when you're overwhelmed and when you're not living in true alignment. Just check in with yourself more regularly. Ask yourself, what do I need in this moment? How am I feeling? How am I feeling in my body? What do I really need right now? Is the answer really to do more, or can I actually take a step back and just do a little bit less? You know, how can I protect my energy here? How can I regulate myself? How can I regulate my emotions? Really just check in with yourself, practice self-awareness because, like I said, honestly, it's a superpower. Anyway, that is all for today, but I'm actually recording with my first guest, who is um one of my ex-clients and now a very, very good friend of mine um tomorrow. And I also have another couple of guests lined up very soon as well. So stay tuned for for more episodes coming soon. And if you listen, please share and tag me on Instagram because I love hearing your thoughts and seeing you all listening, like it really does mean a lot. So thanks for listening. Speak to you soon.