I'll Just Let Myself In
"I’ll Just Let Myself In" is an empowering new podcast dedicated to people who are ready to take a chance on themselves and forge their own path. Hosted by Lish Speaks, each episode explores personal stories, triumphs, and challenges of navigating industries from the “outside-in.” From entrepreneurship to career advancement, self-care to self-discovery, this podcast provides candid conversations, practical advice, and inspirational anecdotes to motivate listeners to embrace their identity, defy societal norms, and pursue their dreams unapologetically. Join us on this journey as we celebrate the strength and tenacity of our guest and hopefully ourselves! It's time to take a chance on yourself and Let Yourself In!
Video version available on the @lishspeaks Youtube channel
I'll Just Let Myself In
God doesn't need your raw talent; He needs your refined skill - Into Impact w/ Ashley Kirkwood
Have you ever wondered why your spiritual gifts aren't translating into the success you envision? The missing piece might be simpler than you think.
In this enlightening conversation with attorney, entrepreneur, and speaking coach Ashley Kirkwood, we uncover the critical relationship between divine gifts and deliberate skill development. Ashley shares her remarkable journey from a struggling undergraduate student with a criminal record to becoming a Northwestern Law graduate and successful business owner, revealing how both faith and focused skill-building shaped her path.
"Even Jesus, who's literally Jesus, didn't go straight into itinerant ministry," Ashley points out. "He perfected a skill. He was a carpenter." This powerful perspective challenges our tendency to rush into our calling without proper preparation. The divine gifts we receive must be paired with developed skills to create sustainable success.
Ashley doesn't just inspire—she provides practical insights on determining your expertise, packaging your knowledge into sellable offers, and distinguishing between spiritual gifts and marketable skills. She candidly discusses her experience balancing motherhood with entrepreneurship, setting standards that won't be compromised, and building confidence that changes lives.
Whether you're struggling to monetize your talents, feeling stalled in your growth, or simply sensing there's a gap between your potential and your results, this episode offers both spiritual wisdom and strategic guidance. The message is clear: calm down, write that vision, and then get to work developing the skills that will bring it to life. Your supernatural breakthrough may be waiting on your natural preparation.
Send us a text with your thoughts, feedback, or questions for the host!
You need to work on a skill. You need to take what the Holy Spirit gave you and then, from there, ask him to give you discernment about where you can learn and develop and hone your skill. Even Jesus who's literally Jesus didn't go straight into itinerant ministry. He perfected a skill. He was a carpenter. I assume he had to learn some skills to be a carpenter. He had to steward that well, and then he was elevated. And so I think that a lot of us want to go straight into these supernatural things without preparation, and that's why we struggle. If you would just calm down, baby, calm down, you got the vision. That's good. Write that vision, make it plain.
Speaker 2:And then get to work. What's up, everybody, it's your, your girl, lish, speaks, and welcome back to another episode of my podcast. I'll Just Let Myself In. It's the podcast where we don't wait for an imaginary permission slip or some imaginary invitation to some seat at a table somewhere. We let ourselves into our God-given doors. I think it's so important that we lock into that in this season, because a lot of us have things to give, things. We're trying to learn things, we're trying to grow and we're waiting for some sign or some person to come in and help us. And the truth is, god is providing those resources as we speak.
Speaker 2:You know, when I have a guest, when I don't have a solo episode and I have a guest, I try to bring you guys the most informative, the best guests who can come and help you to learn how to let yourself in. And the person that I have sitting on the couch today is indeed a woman who has let herself in and she's kept the door open behind her to bring others along. She is an attorney, an entrepreneur, she has a business called Speak your Way to Cash and she runs incredible seminars, events that really help women and men, but mostly black women, a focus on black women to go ahead and learn how to speak their way to cash. To go ahead and learn how to speak their way to cash. One thing I love about my guest is that she has the knowledge to back up the things that she says. Ladies and gentlemen, on the couch today I have Mrs Ashley Kirkwood.
Speaker 1:Yes, I'm so glad to be here with you. Welcome, welcome, welcome.
Speaker 2:This is going to be so fun it is. It's going to be a time, because I love a person who speaks with authority, but it's the best when they're speaking with authority and they actually know what they're talking about. We're in a season that everyone speaks with authority.
Speaker 1:But not everybody knows what they're talking about.
Speaker 2:That is so true, and you very much know what you're speaking about.
Speaker 1:Oh, thank you.
Speaker 2:You probably don't remember this, but the first time we met was at the first BCI, oh yes, at the first BCI at Riverside Epicenter.
Speaker 2:Yes, and I saw you speak on a panel and I thought to myself, who is that? Because I had never seen you, I wasn't following you or anything like that, and you spoke about us needing to have a plan and systems to get where we needed to go. You spoke about your time in corporate, your time running a law firm and what you learned from that and how you were using it to be an entrepreneur. I'm excited because I have a followership. I have a listenership of women and men, but mostly women who really want to do big things in this world, and it's great to want to, it's great to try to, it's best to have a system to get you to the desired outcome, and I think you can teach my audience that today. So thank you for being here.
Speaker 1:I'm glad to be here. I can't wait.
Speaker 2:I'm so excited about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I want you to tell us a little bit about what you do with Speak your Way to Cash, and then I want to ask you when did you know you were a speaker?
Speaker 1:Oh, that's a great question. So here's what I will say Speak your Way to Cash is a manifestation of a prayer. My mom prayed for me Because my mom always wanted me to be happy, like I think that she genuinely wanted me to use my gifts to exhibit my gifts to the world. I was taught, kind of probably from my dad and my parents are still married to this day like you're going to be a lawyer. Okay, yeah, happy gifts, that's great. You want to speak Like you said. You wanted to be Oprah? Okay, yeah, happy gifts, that's great. You want to speak like you said. You want to be Oprah. I was like that was me. I went to go.
Speaker 1:I watched every episode of Oprah before I did my um, my youth, my first YouTube show that's still on YouTube. You could go on my YouTube all the way back. It was called passion, purpose and paychecks. I would binge watch Oprah and a y'all. I was like I am a mix between these two and literally, um, my mom took me to the Oprah Winfrey show. They let me ask a question. I asked a question. It was so good. The producers were like, okay, you're going to come on our radio show.
Speaker 1:So I went on Oprah's radio show and I was like this is it? This is my big break, like it was right before college, so maybe like 15, 15, 16. That's amazing. Is there footage of this? I don't know there probably is. But I do all of this and I'm like I'm going to do a talk show. Oprah had a competition for the own network to get a show. I wanted to do that and I was like I'm going to go for it, I think I could get it. I wanted to interview people I actually wanted who had fallen on their luck, who were living on the street, who had lost like a lot of wealth and they were rebuilding everything. And I was like I want to tell the stories from the street and I was like I think this would be great. This is my concept for it. And my parents were like you have to go to law school first.
Speaker 2:You have to go to law school.
Speaker 1:First you have to finish your degree. This is important and I remember being like why, what is the point of this? And it was, but my mom always wanted me to use my gifts. So I went to school, I spoke, but this is going to be something for everyone watching this. I had so much fun speaking. I had so much fun helping people with, you know, cultivating their gifts and empowering people and motivating them, that I was like there's no way that's a job motivating them, that I was like there's no way that's a job.
Speaker 1:In my mind, things that are sustainable were also sedentary. They were boring, they were cubicles, they were offices, they were lawyer, doctor, engineer. And so I'm like, well, I have these gifts, so maybe I'll just work this job and I'll work towards being a lawyer and then, on the side, I'll use those gifts. Almost to the point that if I really said my dream when I was younger, it would have been to be a full-time professional speaker.
Speaker 1:I used to tell people not many people, but I told a couple people I want to be a traveling evangelist. I was like there's no way I'll get paid for this, but I was like I want to be a traveling evangelist, but I only told that to like my super churchy friends and then everyone else. They'd be like what you want to be. I'd be like I'm gonna be a lawyer, but like I was, I was scared to speak my dream because I didn't think it was a reality, like I didn't think it would happen, and I think that there are a lot of people like that who know what they are born to do, but they also know what is acceptable.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and so I went on, I became a lawyer and lucrative, because I also I didn't want to be broke the part. My dream never include poverty. And so I just was like, oh no. Even when I went to law school, I was like I'm going to be a public defender. My auntie was like, do you know how much they make? I said how much. She said $43,000 was the starting salary.
Speaker 1:When I was in law school for a public defender. I was like, no, they're lawyers. And she was like no $, said oh no, who makes more than that? They were like, well, the highest paid lawyers. They are trial lawyers for big companies. They work in what's called big law, so that's one of the top 14 law firms in the world. They work at one of those firms. And I was like, ok, well, I'm going to do that. And they were like, well, to do that, you have to go to Northwestern, you have to go to these other things. And I was like, well, if, if I got to do all of that to get what I want, that's what I'm gonna do. Show me who's done that.
Speaker 1:And so I went and found people, and then I wanted to find black women who done it. It's cool to find other people who did it, cuz sometimes I needed to find both. But I was, like any sisters who've done this, who gets all A's? And I went and I interviewed them and I was like, well, how did you get all A's in law school? Because my grades in undergrad I almost failed out. I mean, I graduated with a 2.1. You need a 2.0 to graduate. So I was a C average student. There was nothing in the cards that said I was going to be a lawyer. But I had this. Really, my parents told me I was going to be a lawyer. I believed I could be a lawyer and I just believed it would work out. And so, 2, 2.1 graduate.
Speaker 1:I applied to law school. I don't get in anywhere. And this is where a lot of people stop, because most people would be like, well, it's my dream, but I didn't get in. I literally met a woman at one of my events. She was like I want to be a lawyer. I was like great, why aren't you a lawyer? She was like I didn't get to law school right. And she was like, yeah, I was like so great, you didn't get in the first time. If you're going to be a lawyer, you have to go to law school. Just apply again. She was like, well, what if I don't get in again? I was like, then you just apply again. And I think that a lot of people are giving up on their dreams because they forgot the word again, like literally, do it again.
Speaker 1:The second time I applied I got into one law school. I said, okay, we're getting closer. So I got into that one law school. It wasn't ranked very high, but I go to that law school, end up getting all A's and I was like, well, this law school isn't going to get me to that $300,000 job, so what law school will? They said Northwestern or University of Chicago. I was like, great. So I applied to Northwestern and the University of Chicago and got into Northwestern. But the chances of me going from a low rank law school to Northwestern were slim to none. So I did the same thing I did to get into law school. I said, well, who's done it? They had this white guy named Connor. I was like, okay, no, sisters. They was like, no, we ain't got one of them for you. We got Connor. I was like, okay, let me go find Connor. I found Connor they did to get there.
Speaker 1:You do 10 times more because whatever they told you they did, it was 10 times more. They didn't have time to tell you about all the sleepless nights. They didn't have time to tell you about all the times they wanted to quit. They didn't have time to tell you they were studying until they fell asleep at the library. They didn't tell you all that because they didn't even think you got time for all that. They told you what they could tell you in that little hour long conversation. Do 10 times more because they did 10 times more and didn't tell you.
Speaker 1:So I did 10 times more down to the fact that when I was studying for my current law school, I went to Northwestern to study because I couldn't get into the school right away but I could get into the library. So I was like, okay, I'm going to go to the library and study. And I noticed at my law school when I studied, studied, I saw concrete because of the location at Northwestern, when they studied, they saw Lake Michigan. So I was like, dang, it's even more beautiful over here. When I studied, I heard sirens where they studied, they didn't hear all that noise. So I was like, wow, the higher you go, the more quiet it gets. I was like, oh well, I want to be over here.
Speaker 1:They were happier they didn't have a curve. I had a curve at my first law school meaning that it's so many parallels to life but like at the first school, it wasn't ranked high. So every year only six people in my class could get an A. So it's 65 in the class because they grade everything on a curve and 10% are going to fail out because everyone cannot get an A. At Northwestern everyone could get an A and and that just showed the difference in really poverty and wealth is opportunity. The higher ranked schools you go, the less restrictive it is.
Speaker 1:The lower ranked school you're at, the more competitive it is, the more they want you to fight each other, the more they want you to hate on each other. The more you're clawing for that one spot, the more scarcity there is. That's why people say it's crabs in a barrel, but it's not it. The more scarcity there is. That's why people say it's crabs in a barrel, but it's not. It's racism. You know what I mean? It's that we have been put into environments where we had to fight to survive, where there was not enough space. If you think of the slave ships, it wasn't roomy. It was by design that they make us think they will only hire one. And then look at corporations, look at companies. It's only a small, select few. So I go to Northwestern, I study in the library, I talk to all the professors, I talk to all the students and when I write my essay to get in I don't say, oh, I want to go to the school because of whatever everyone else is saying. I tell stories about the people. I'm like, you know. I want to go here because when I was studying in the library I met Sarah and Sarah's a 2L and she told me that in all of her classes. What she loves most is this. That's what I'm looking for.
Speaker 1:And so, because I told those stories, I got an interview and even though I told all those great stories and I studied there and I did all of this in the interview, I could tell the admissions officer her name was Emily. I could tell she wasn't going to let me in Because I had done well in law school. I got all A's there, but I, in law school, I got all A's there but I had bad grades in undergrad. I told y'all that and I got arrested in undergrad and she wasn't gonna ask what you did. Oh, shoplifting, okay, from Walmart, which, when I got arrested, I had to go in the holding cell. And the women in the holding cell was like what are y'all here for?
Speaker 1:and I was like, oh, I shoplifted from Walmart. They were like girl, you can't steal from Walmart. If you steal from Walmart, you definitely gonna. I'm like I don't know. I'm not like a career criminal. I was trying to impress, no, I mean. Well, first off I had this group of friends and some of them, you know, used to steal a lot. But I was trying to get into this sorority so I was stealing like toiletries and stuff to give to this little thing. Whatever I is, she in None Jesus sorority. Don't get the people started on all sorts of sorority right now.
Speaker 1:I pledged to Jesus engrafted by his blood. No hazing required from me, so literally now I got off track, but anyways.
Speaker 2:People do that over here, we just have fun.
Speaker 1:I knew that she wasn't going to let me in because she was like this girl got a criminal record, she has these bad grades. She has one semester, two semesters, of proof that she's changed her life, but I don't know if that's enough. So, before she ends the interview, I did something that I think a lot of people need to start doing. I answered the unanswered objection and I told her hey, emily, I know you're looking at my grades. I know you're looking at the time that I was arrested. Here's what happened with that.
Speaker 1:And I told her what happened and then I was like but if you let me in, I'll be one of the most successful alumni this school has seen. I was like I'm going to give back, I'm going to work hard and I'm going to continue to do what you would want someone to do who goes here. I'm going to make the Northwestern name proud and you know I still have a lot of life to fulfill that promise. But one of the things it did was it literally made her comfortable with my past mistakes and it made her aware that, like I knew who I was, but she didn't know who I am, and sometimes you make mistakes in your past and people are judging you for who you were because you haven't told them who you are so like instead of being afraid, oh my God, I got arrested. That means I'm a bad person, does it?
Speaker 2:You might be a traveling evangelist.
Speaker 1:Invite me to your church brunch, baby. Okay, that is so good, but yeah. So I just told her who I was and I think, like if we wear our past as a badge of honor, it becomes a testimony, similarly to similar to all the testimonies in the bible. Yeah, if we don't, then it becomes shame. Yeah, and I think the devil wants us to swallow our mistakes, hold them in our heart, not tell anyone about it, instead of speaking it out and being freed by it. There's a reason. You went through it and God wastes nothing. So I told her that ended up getting in. Then I got in, did well, graduated top of my class cum laude from Northwestern, worked at one of the largest law firms in the world for litigation. They represented everything from Volkswagen to BP Oil Spill and I was the only sister in litigation and I loved the firm. I loved my experience at Kirkland. But I was offered a six-figure raise to go to another firm and I took it. I took it, that'll do it. Then I got there and I hated that day one.
Speaker 2:I did not like it. I was like man, I made a mistake, mistake.
Speaker 1:I even tried to go back predominantly white, of course, of course, right, like if you think about the firms that can afford, like we were just talking about, like there's, there's very few companies and very few firms that can afford top talent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, you know who they are we all know google pays well, but of the tech giants, there's a there's like probably 10 to 15 percent that can pay like that. It's the same in law. There's a very few amount of firms that can pay like that. It's the same in law. There's a very few amount of firms that can pay like that. They're all the same, they're all big and they're all predominantly white. Yeah, if we're being real.
Speaker 1:And so I got there, my boss was rude, realized I wasn't the first black woman that they had tried to recruit for that department, I was probably like the fourth. But the paycheck. So if I would have done my research beforehand, I would have been saved. But that level of uncomfortability is what started Speak your Way to Cash inadvertently. So I ended up quitting one day because I was tired of that disrespect, because one thing about me I think God has used my pride to like push me to do stuff. Because I was just like I'm not letting you talk to me crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like I'm just not. I've always been a student of black history. My dad made me proud to be black. I'm like nah, you got one more time to come in here talking crazy.
Speaker 1:So I left without a plan, but I was writing a book while working at that firm and when I left I just bulk, sold my book to colleges and law schools and started getting paid to speak my book to colleges and law schools and started getting paid to speak and traveled around on like spirit airlines back in the day and would just speak at colleges and university and started making a little bit of money not three hundred thousand dollars, but a little bit of money. And then when the pandemic hit, because I was making a little bit of money doing that, I started my own law firm. That's where we did really well as a law firm. So we had packages from six to twenty thousand dollars per month. People were paying us for legal services, no ads. We marketed everything online and we built that up to about half a million dollars.
Speaker 2:Is that Mobile General Counsel? Mobile General Counsel.
Speaker 1:So that was moving and shaking. But what I love was the speaking. And when the pandemic hit in 2020, that's when our business, our speaking side of our business really, really well, because we were then able to license a lot more than ever. Everything went virtual, but we did not give them access to the replays. So by this point now, around 2018, 2019, we started getting more college engagements. We got our first like $25,000 college contract and $10,000 college contract, and these were for like one hour talks, like one hour talks same day, and I'm like, well, this could work, like this is promising, yeah. But when that pandemic hit and people wanted the same thing, we were teaching the colleges in their companies like resilience, confidence, communication that's my next question, but go ahead.
Speaker 2:They wanted all of that. I was like okay, cool.
Speaker 1:So we were doing that, virtually 15,000, not leaving our house. Then they wanted the replay. Well, I didn't give it to them, they had to license it from me. And then I started selling license training on demand to different business owners.
Speaker 1:I just and that's when people were like, teach me your ways. And I'm like, okay, so we did our first larger speak your way to cash event in 2021. But our first one was in 2019, with just 10 people and it was just an event. But that's really how speak your way to cash got going and over the years we grew it from just I do speaks speeches to now I do coaching and consulting and helping other people to grow their firms and and now it's really just exploded. I think once you've mastered an art form and you can package that and teach other people how to do the same thing and get a whole lot more success stories than your own, your business will grow. And this year was our second year on the Inc 5000 list. Love it amazing and I do it with my man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yes, with your amazing husband yes, uh, you guys both be on that stage. Yes, you know, shooting basketballs lifting weights running around. I'm like, oh, they don't play right and we're gonna get into that in a second. I know that you just came from London. Yes, oh.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, your first sold out event there. Yes, that was amazing.
Speaker 2:And this was your first international event, correct?
Speaker 1:It was our second. So we did an event called Speak your Way to Millions in Ghana in January of 2020. When was that, Sean? I feel like 2023. 2023 was our Ghana event and it was 350 Ghanaian entrepreneurs and we did it for free. We had like a VIP. We always have upsell. Okay, so we had a little VIP section and some folks took that. So that was our first international event and we planned it in less than like a week Wow.
Speaker 1:While I was on vacation there. I just was like, oh, let's see if we could cause. I was like maybe people want to meet up for coffee and I like hundreds of people and I was like, oh, snap. And Chris was like, how do you? These people know you in Ghana? I was like the internet man, so it was wild like, and then thousands registered but 350 showed up in Ghana, wow, and so that was amazing.
Speaker 1:But it was a free event plus paid. So the London event, it was all paid, everyone had a ticket, they purchased a ticket. So I didn't know. I was like, okay, because you know, yeah, you do something for free, yeah, and attract free, yeah, yeah, yeah. But if you do a paid event, you know people really have to invest in that, and so that was really cool. But London, yeah, was our first fully paid international event and it was great. It sold out in three days. Yeah, what did you learn about yourself from that event From London?
Speaker 1:Oh, london was wild because my husband missed the plane with my daughter. They decided to get their passport renewed the day of our flight. Didn't get it in time because in Atlanta the passport office closed at 3 30 pm and they're not gonna stay a minute after, okay, just in case y'all was wondering yeah, so my husband missed the plane. Um, our videographer got sick the hour before the flight. I found out he couldn't make it and I'd already bought flights, hotels, everything and I'm going to London alone, without my husband, without my support system, without anything. And I told my audience. I was like I just feel so defeated because I'm like I planned this to a T and I knew I was going to a new territory. I did not want to go to London without my team, my makeup artist.
Speaker 2:my makeup artist made the flight okay you said that in one of the videos. I was like, yeah, yeah. You were like I'm gonna need my people, I want my people.
Speaker 1:I don't like going places to be like. At the point that I could afford it, I realized I want to go there show up in poor. I don't want to go there show up and like administrate be stressed. Well, I had to do both. Down to like video recording myself. Okay, had a phone on a tripod video recording myself and I think I, on the plane over, I had to hire a new videographer because when, by the time I landed, I had less than 24 hours until the event started. So I'm on a plane hiring a videographer.
Speaker 1:I told my audience what was going on. I think I learned that I am strong. I don't always want to be, because if I wasn't as strong as I was, more people would help me. You're speaking to me Well, well, well, I think that people know I can handle it and so they don't handle me the right way. You know what I mean. I think that that's what I learned. I think that there's times when, because you get it done and it's what I learned I think that there's times when, because you get it done and it's not just me, it's literally like God allows for me to get what I need in every situation From the outside, looking in, it just looks like Ashley Strong, but what I know from the inside out is that God empowers me to do supernatural things, things that I couldn't even do in my own strength.
Speaker 1:It would have taken me out. Supernatural things, things that I couldn't even do in my own strength, it would have taken me out. I also learned I need to praise in moments where it looks like everything's falling apart, instead of pushing Like. I really want my initial response to be praise and it's not. My initial response is like oh heck, no, and sometimes it ain't heck no.
Speaker 1:Be like what the and not because at some point and this is the thing my revenue goals used to be $30,000 a month. My payroll is $60,000 a month. My Amex bill is $1,000 to $200,000 a month Jeez, louise. So it's like I think what people also don't understand and the thing that I deal with a lot is like there is pressure when you're paying all these bills. It's heavy. It is heavy, but it shouldn't be, because my faith is could alleviate that. And it's like I think that sometimes you go through things to build your faith muscle, but when I initially am faced with a challenge, I want to work it out myself, so I'm working my way through instead of faithing my way through.
Speaker 1:And I think London was one of those situations where I just had to figure it out, and even with all of that, up to the very last moment, I'm like telling the videographer where to go. I had to figure it out and even with all of that, up to the very last moment, I'm like telling the videographer where to go. I had to fire the videographer we hired there on site. He showed up with a bad attitude. I said baby, you're going to have to go. Yeah, this ain't going to work. You cannot, you can't fire. You're welcome to leave now. Do you want to leave voluntarily or do you want me to call whatever y'all call police?
Speaker 1:Right right right, because I don't know if it's still 911 or what I had to kick him out. Wow, you know, I literally had to kick him out. I'm like, even though it is last minute, the standard does not change. So I think that some people are like you just have to take what you can get and you don't. And I had a woman come up to me at that event, crying because she was like the fact that you fired someone on site meant that you don't allow anyone to change your standards in any country. And I realized in that moment that I am allowing everyone else to determine my standards and I was like, oh no, baby, you hold a standard. I said I will pray for you. I will pray God's best for you.
Speaker 1:But you will not destroy what he has helped me to build. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to go Love you, but leave Yep Absolutely, and I you know, hey, yeah, yeah, people are going to think that you are mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So what you got to let that go. I tell people all the time.
Speaker 2:You have to release the desire to be liked yeah. You have to release the desire to be understood yeah, you can want it, but you have to release the need is what I say you have to release the need.
Speaker 1:To be understood To be liked Because I'm going to feel bad and do it anyways, baby, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll be all right, you'll be okay and you'll learn and you'll be. I love this person. I don't think I can fire them. I need you to let them go and people will send their resignations to me. I prayed that prayer within 48 hours. Wow, 48 hours from today, I prayed a prayer like Lord, I don't think this is right.
Speaker 2:I don't know about this one.
Speaker 1:I felt myself. I don't know if you've ever had this feeling where you can literally feel that you're not the same person. Yes, that you're like on the brink of something huge. Yes, Like you see a vision for your business that surpasses everything you've ever done, and you're just like I can't do it with the people that I have, and literally I'm like Lord, I need you to get them out, Like I need you to. I need you to, hey, make it, make it make sense, Make the budget, make room for the budget of the person who needs to come here.
Speaker 2:See, I'm not where you are. So my prayer is Lord, reveal the people who are supposed to come in. Yeah, because I ain't got no employees yet. But I'm often praying for God to show me my helpers, show me my destiny helpers, and he does. He does that and he also shows me. It's so funny. I was talking to my sister the other day and I said none of you will ever work for me, you know, because people will be like oh, your cousin, you didn't say that. I said none of you. I said I am a very bossy boss and I don't have time to be worried about my tone and I'm respectful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but, you know you treat your mama and your sister and your cousin differently, because people feelings get hurt, people get weird. Yeah, you know I had. She had asked me if I needed help with something. I had given her a task, a very simple task. Now my sister got a lot going on, so I understand, but it didn't. It didn't happen in a timely manner and I said if you worked for me, this would have been a huge issue, because you asked me in this volunteer, I went and did it and it's fine, but you, you wouldn't want to work for me. I mean because I don't.
Speaker 2:I don't take no prisoners when it comes to that like I am the boss, when I'm the boss, and I think it's so important as black women that we understand our voice matters, that what standard we set matters. When you come into a space, you need to demand to be treated how you want to be treated and you need to preface that with treating other people with respect. One of the reasons that you're sitting on this couch right now is because we were in a space and the energy was odd, but I treated you with love and respect and normalcy what we think is normal and it forged a relationship, and I think so many people miss that because they are not operating for themselves in a place where they respect themselves. See, when you don't respect yourself, it's easy to disrespect other people. When you don't regard your own emotions, it's easy to disregard other people's people.
Speaker 1:Yeah, when you don't regard your own emotions, easy to disagree with other people's. And when you don't, when you don't take care of yourself, a lot of people like I don't have time to take a break and it's like no, it's literally called taking a break because no one's going to give it to you. You are going to have to take it so you don't take time.
Speaker 1:You make time and you take a break aggressively. If you need to, yeah, I will block off, like. I use this app called Opal O-P-A-L. It allows me to block any app on my phone. My team can't reach me sometimes. You don't need to reach me all the time. I don't need to be always accessible. No one pays me enough to be that accessible. No, like I'm off. I'm doing deep work. I'm getting done what I have to get done to move this business forward. I'm not always available no-transcript. A hard thing of this industry is if you're not like. We recently re-orged our social media department and I had to let go of someone who was doing all of our social media posting and I'm like, okay, well, now we're not. We were posting three times a day, 12 shorts a day on YouTube. I mean, we were seriously getting after it with some content. But I didn't love the quality and I was like I need better quality. I want my video quality better. I want the audio quality better. I was like I refuse to allow this to be the standard.
Speaker 1:So I let them go and I'd let them go and I'm like well, dang well now, I got to do it and I got to do this and I got to do that, and it's like no, if you don't post for a couple weeks, people will be OK, they'll be fine, it'll be fine, you won't be forgotten about, you won't be. And I think that need of like, I need to be seen content yeah, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the oh my god. But what if they forget me? Yeah, who cares? Yeah, the anxiety of it all, the anxiety of it all, the emotions that come after that, and so I've just been exploring that with God, even down to like the guilt that comes from.
Speaker 1:I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but, like I, sometimes I have a lot of different pockets of my life. My daughter just started kindergarten. She goes to a private school. They're very demanding. We've been at the school four times this week. Ain't nothing wrong. They just got lots of activities going on and I'm like okay, so if this is the cadence, I'm getting her a VA, because I don't want to miss nothing.
Speaker 1:But I also am not glued to this long newsletter y'all send out every week. Okay, right, right. So I'm like okay, I got the mom life. I got my husband and I. We have a relationship coach. I'm investing in that. I want to make sure that stays amazing. I don't want to just good marriage, I want an optimal marriage. So I want that to be great. I want to make sure I take care of him in every way possible. So then I got my parents. They're still alive. I want to make sure I'm spending time with them, my business, my spiritual life and with everything that goes on.
Speaker 1:Some days I'm like dang. I feel like I could fit in a 10-minute prayer in my prayer room, but that's not long enough, so I shouldn't even go in there. So then it's the guilt of like dang. I haven't spent enough time with God. I'm in this Bible certificate program. I just told them I can't do all this in person. I'm going to go online, like I just have to optimize my life. So what happens is and I think this is a trick of the enemy is, if we can't do it the way we imagine it needs to be done, with all the eloquence of prayer and the eloquence of speech, we're like God don't want to hear from me, like I don't. Even this doesn't to make sense.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I'm reading. There's a book called, like, the relentless unhurt, unhurrying, or unbusying.
Speaker 1:Let me see if I can find the exact name of it, but it's a really good book. Um, by a pastor. He was a pastor of a mega church. He ended up giving up his mega church, which was fast growing, because he said it was literally like if the devil won't make you sin, he'll make you busy.
Speaker 2:Yes, I've heard that before. I feel like I heard Dr Darius Daniel say that at one point.
Speaker 1:The ruthless elimination of hurry by John Mark Comer and John Ortberg really good book. Like why are we always rushing? He was like Jesus has so much to do but you never see him rush. So it's not about what's on your calendar, it's about the emotional approach you take to getting it done. Yeah, and why are you saying yes? I've never regretted a no, I've only regretted a yes.
Speaker 2:That's very true.
Speaker 1:In my entire. I can't think of a single no regret. I had yes in big and small things In everything.
Speaker 2:I agree. That's good. You said in first of all, all you have a really dope series called behind the build. Oh yeah, that you do on youtube. I'm so impressed by by your youth, by everything you got thank you.
Speaker 1:Shout out to sean he's, he's done.
Speaker 2:Every behind the build episode really, really cool and I feel like it's a great um look into entrepreneurship, um what it takes I love that you kind of let, even though we are your potential clients. You let us behind the curtain of okay, this is what I'm selling, this is how we sell. You know, we are going to be Disneyland.
Speaker 2:This is what you know, this is what, this is what we do. I may say this to y'all, but this is what I'm going to say, and you said something that I thought was like so profound. You talked about how you feel like your capacity is stretching.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You're stretching and you alluded to this a little bit a minute ago and you said that there's a supernatural shift happening that you feel that is going to require you to be a different person than you've been in the past. I would imagine that that is somewhat daunting, right? Yeah, talk about going to the gym, sometimes twice a day. Yes, how are you reconciling who you used to be with?
Speaker 1:who you need to be. You know it's like a butterfly. You don't a butterfly. Ain't trying to reconcile with the caterpillar you know, what I mean.
Speaker 1:she's just because, like, she's just doing what you do and I think that, like we put too much on it sometimes. Yeah, once you realize you just I often think about, okay, the highest version of me, is she worried about eating some fried chicken right now? No, would she rather have a meal or a life? Would she rather have? Like, I really do think about this and I am a very black and white person. It's just the way my brain works. I literally just got a brain scan because I'm really big on understanding how my brain works. I want to be optimal when I say every area, every area.
Speaker 2:No, it's clear, it's very clear.
Speaker 1:I'm like how do we get this right? How do we get so I'm in a Bible certificate? I'm like I need to learn more about to things that can change my life. Health is one of those things. Spirituality is one of those things Our pillars at our company, faith, family finances, formidability and fitness. So in all five of those areas, I have a vision for how I want my life to look, and one of the things that I will say is what was daunting about it wasn't who I needed to become. What was daunting was how am I going to communicate that to the people who know who I am? How am I willing to let some people go that I love? Am I willing to disappoint some people? Am I willing to be unavailable to my family in some areas? Am I willing to be unavailable to my husband some areas? Am I willing to be unavailable to my husband? I went on a solo sabbatical. I'd never done that I. We go me and my husband.
Speaker 2:we go everywhere together like I was, like you come to the podcast, you come to this, you come to this.
Speaker 1:He was like you didn't even tell me about this, I have other stuff to do. I'm like okay, fine, so I love, love, love, like my dream was to work with married. It'll be 14 years next year.
Speaker 1:So, 13 years this year, amazing, yeah. So it's really cool. We got married at 22 and 23. Had free furniture in a little 500-scarefoot apartment. We didn't have no money. I wasn't a lawyer. We got married before law. He helped me study for the bar, choose my first job. He's like we built everything together. So I hate seeing those conversations like you need a man, six feet, six figures, child, please. Yeah, six, six, six and I'm like y'all know that's not good.
Speaker 2:That's the devil right All the time it's like okay.
Speaker 1:But like I don't, really I don't like that. I married my husband for his character and his heart Same and he loves me regardless. He I was broke. He loves me when I'm rich. He loves me when I'm when money is looking great. He loves me when it's not looking good. He loves me when I'm being like a CEOzilla. He loves me when I'm regular. He loves me like all the time. So I just I really do love him.
Speaker 1:But I think the most daunting thing is that I had a conversation with my husband and I was like hey, so if, if, we're going to build. I think I called him after some event and I was like I think this is the first time. I feel like we could probably do a billion. He was like a billion. I was like yeah, but are you okay with that? Yeah, I was like are you okay? I was like cause I can get.
Speaker 1:I was like I could see the path to a hundred million dollar company. I'm like but are you okay with the level of work I'd have to put in in order to do that? Cause it, cause we year we were in a chill year. We just basically maintained we actually took a revenue dip strategically so I could recover from a really hard year. And he, I was like okay, but we're back up, like we're scaling the, the train is moving, yeah, so are you okay? Yeah, with me doing that. And he was very honest with me. He was like I don't even know what that looks like and I was like well, me neither, so you just gotta you just go out to commit first and figure out later you know.
Speaker 1:So I think that was hard. It's like how will my family take it? And then what am I? What am I going to do to protect the people that mean the most to me as I evolve? Yeah, so that looks like like date nights setting up the nanny in advance.
Speaker 1:Um, mommy daughter days with my daughter me and her go on mommy daughter days and I don't, I don't like driving. So I was like, well, if I don't like driving, and driving stresses me out, and being with her alone at first was really stressful because my husband is like really really good with my daughter so I don't even know how to put a car seat in, like he does all of that I don't know, sounds like my future, yeah, like I don't know anything. So the first time I tried to drive on Mommy Daughter Day, I went to the wrong nail salon. Christelle was like yo, can we call daddy to drive, because this is really. I was like okay, so we book a driver for our mommy-daughter days.
Speaker 1:So now it's like me, her Hussein, and that's our driver. He's going to make sure we get where we need to go. But I'm like, okay, I need to protect some things, I need to have solo vacations. That was epic. I'd never been anywhere alone on vacation out the country. Like that was amazing. It was life changing.
Speaker 2:I have a friend that says anything other than a solo vacation is a trip. It's not a vacation. She said, vacation is when you go alone. Now she's not married, but she was like, vacation is when you go Everything else is just a trip and I was like it's interesting because I haven't been on a solo vacation either. It is amazing.
Speaker 1:I've heard that was now. It depends on where you go. You need to go somewhere I've gone before that knew me, that had all of my little luxuries that I like and then for our family vacations they can be a vacation if you have help. So we go to resorts that have kids clubs. We go to resorts that have nannies that we trust. We think about what she would like to do, what we want to do together. You just have to really think through what you want.
Speaker 2:And I just think some people aren't honest about what they want. Yes, I agree, women, one of the things I love. Women like I don't know if you know Candice Brathwaite she's a um oh yeah, she's an influencer in uh, london actually, and she's somebody I've been following for a long time. Tanika B she's another influencer, and they're all very honest about motherhood and before my husband and I got married, when we were doing premarital, I actually would just show him their content because I didn't have the language to say if I'm going to be a mother, I need to be this kind of mother yeah, I didn't have the language for it.
Speaker 2:I just I don't want kids. But that wasn't even true, right, I just knew there's a call on my life, there are things I want to do and it's not going to allow me to be a traditional mother. Yeah, um, and I you know you could be afraid to tell a man that, because you know whatever, I told my husband but yeah, yeah, we, we had a talk and we said he was like yeah, I'm fine with that.
Speaker 2:You know what? Whatever you need help yeah, that's what he said. He said we will have help, we will hire help, we will do what, what needs to be. He's like the most important thing about you is that you're gonna love that kid so unconditionally. He like if you treat the child the way you treat me, if you take care of our child the way you take, because I take care of my husband, we take care of each other. You know my husband does not like me to be stressed baby the second I show a sign of discomfort. He's like what do you need? He don't like it. And the same for don't like all that stuff he's like no problem.
Speaker 2:He gets stressed out by things and I'm like I'll cook, it's okay, that's not a big deal to me, I'll pick out that outfit, that's fine, and so we're blessed in that way. But it's been so important to have examples like you to say you can do it extremely successful, not just a little successful. You can be extremely successful and still be a good wife and mother. So I just thank you for that example, because we need to see that you don't got to struggle.
Speaker 1:Mom, you know one of the things that helps and it's almost like taboo, especially in the black community family planning. You will plan to go to college but won't plan when you're going to have kids Family plan, literally. Before I had my daughter, I thought about what were all the things. I wanted to be comfortable as a mom. I wanted a nanny. I wanted a night nurse. I wanted someone to help and drive her to and from places that we trusted. I wanted someone to be a traveling nanny because I didn't want to be away from her. I just want to help with her as we go through things, like even going through the airport. I want her to have her own airport seat. When we decided to have kids, we were like, how many kids are we going to have? We looked up three first class flights to Thailand, because that's where we like to go every year, and we were like, well, we could afford three Once you get into the four, fives and sixes rough at that time. So I was like, okay, well, we gonna have one more kid. Like we're not stopping our travel.
Speaker 1:Christelle has been to like 12 countries. She's been everywhere. She's like, yeah, I just went to Ghana. I went to Norway and Belgium and we went because we go. So when she goes, she goes with us. She's like mom. I think my favorite place is actually Bali. I want to go back there. I say yet mine too, I love them they were great.
Speaker 2:They treat us treat us well.
Speaker 1:She's five, she's five, I love it, and she literally we got on the plane to go to, we got on the plane to go, like, to London, and she goes. Oh, thank God, these are the lay flat seats.
Speaker 2:The lay flat seats Come on lay flat.
Speaker 1:I said now you're going to have to work on your work ethic, because mommy's work ethic got this, daddy's work ethic got this, but your work ethic didn't earn this. You are like the cosby's right we are rich, you have nothing like you need to. I don't know how I feel about she's like oh, thank god, I'm like I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:I love it. Come on, young black princess let me go, stress you out to only go back two inches.
Speaker 1:She's like what is? What? Is this broke? I'm like my gosh. But but one thing I love about that is she now has different standards and as she gets older, we tell her hey, this is what this costs. So when mommy goes and works, when daddy goes and works, it's so that you can afford that. I was like not all kids are traveling internationally right now. I'm like you need to be grateful for these things. These things are not necessarily typical for your age. So this is how we got that Mommy and daddy on a business, so you're going to come to work with us, even with us working out. She was like, okay, I'm gonna do my workout Like she wants to work out. So kids model like they model behavior. And then we have some time where we don't talk about work at all, we're just hanging out. But it is important for moms to know you're not going to win an award because you're the most stressed.
Speaker 2:Oftentimes in mom circles.
Speaker 1:People come together and they just all try to one up each other on how much they're doing for their kids that their kids won't remember. And it's just like you change all these diapers I cut up the carrots in this. Now, some things I think kids will remember, like if you that mom that does like the Disney shapes for the pancakes and all that, if you do that all the time, I think they will remember that. But I think like it does not matter if you were the one changing the diaper or not. Remember that. But I think like it does not matter if you were the one changing the diaper or not. It doesn't matter if you warmed up the milk, if you were there to give it to him at night. Like I just feel like there are some elements of it that I don't remember.
Speaker 1:I do remember my kids being at my parents, being at every major event I did. I remember that. I remember my mom teaching me how to deal with jealousy and how to identify. I remember her telling me how, to date. I remember my dad teaching me about negotiating salaries, work ethic, doing deals, owning real estate. I remember the lessons and the love and the presence. I don't remember the stress who cut up the carrot or who made the doctor's appointment. So my thing is let me strip out all the administrative elements that I don't really have time for and enjoy, and then let me be there for every single moment that makes her the woman that she will become. Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 1:I love that and then let her see a non-stressed out mom.
Speaker 1:Yes, let her see a happy mom let her see a happy mom, because she can tell if I'm stressed, because she'll be like of course, what did I do? Did I do something? And I'm just like, oh. And one day she told this is what made me figure out I'm about to get a rock star team, and even more of a rock star team than I have. She was like mommy, if you hire another team or if you add more people to your team, will that mean that you get to spend more time with me? And I said, yup, that makes that salary worth it.
Speaker 1:Yup, it will like it really will yeah it will and we talk about you know what, what dreams she has, and now her school sends us pictures of what she does every day. So at night I'm like, okay, so tell me about this picture, tell me about this picture, tell me about that picture she's speaking at Speak your Way to Cash Live. Yeah, so we're working on it. She has her framework, we're practicing her talk. So you bring your kids in.
Speaker 1:Because I went to work with my dad and my mom and owned a company together. So I went to work with them and I saw, I saw all the papers all over the floor. I would just sit there playing with paper. Just being by them was like critical, yeah, so that's what I tried to do for my daughter and I'm so close with my parents. So I say that to say some of y'all are stressed out, your audience, y'all stressed out because you're like they're going to hate me for working. Let them kids see you work. Yes, bring them along as much as you can. That's the benefit of entrepreneurship. If they have, take your kid to work day, take your kids. Yeah, like my mom had that at her company, I went, yeah it was so cool.
Speaker 2:She worked for a bank manufacturers, which then became chase, but she used to take me to work and like, show me, and I think it's so, it's so fitting, especially for black young women. We, we need to see it. We need to see that representation matters. You know, speaking of your daughter, speaking at Speak your Way to Cash.
Speaker 2:I want to talk a little bit about Speak your Way to Cash. Not just the upcoming Speak your Way to Cash, but Speak your Way. Speak teaching someone how to speak their way to cash. Yes, as a whole, right, yeah, so I'm in a situation where.
Speaker 2:I am learning what my gifts are, Okay. So a lot of people around me they're like yeah, it's obvious, yes, you have a gift for speaking, but when something is normal to you and it's just what you do, it's just what you do, yeah. And so I'm finally I would say probably over the last 18 months realizing like yo, this is something that I want to do professionally, this is something that I think I'd be really good at, but I don't always know exactly what I should be speaking about. How would Speak your Way to Cash help someone like me?
Speaker 1:So, first you want to one. We have a Speak your Way to Cash book. Everyone who wants to get paid to speak at all should read that book. That's like your first step. We talk about something in that book called the fame method, which is what do friends and family say about you? That's the f. What are the audiences that can pay you? That's the a. What is the ways that you're going to monetize? That's the m. And then, what is your expertise or education say you're great at?
Speaker 1:Because a lot of people think about oh, I'm passionate about this. Okay, but you need to find the intersection between passion, purpose and then the little. If these were two circles, the circle in the middle would be like paychecks. Where is the intersection between what you love, what you are purposed to do, and what the market actually pays for? Currently, not like, oh, I can't find anyone that does this. That's why I'm unique. No, no, you're not unique, not in 2025. 2025, you may have a unique way of communicating something, but you probably are not the first. Yeah, and you want to work inside of a market.
Speaker 1:If you're going to create a market, you need venture capital. Yeah, like, think about uber right 50 years ago, if you were to say, hey, I'm about to um, I'm about to just get in some stranger's car and go to Walgreens, people would think you were crazy. So they raised enough money to educate the market and make it seem safe. Now it's like every day. There are some incidents of unsafety, but most of the time people don't care about using an Uber that costs a lot to break into a market. Most people don't have enough capital to truly educate a market on something on a brand new concept. Same for Airbnb. They got venture funds. They had to keep selling other random stuff until they had enough money to prove to investors that Airbnb would be successful. They had to get some money to educate the market because it sounded like a crazy concept. People told them over and over no one's going to let random people stay in their house Like. I got somebody in my Airbnb right now and it's just like they really at my house in Chicago having a good time. They're great tenants too, so stay longer, okay, but that is a brand new concept.
Speaker 1:What I find most entrepreneurs are doing, especially in the church world oh my gosh. And the church world is bad because, I mean, I'm saying a lot of people are not selling an offer, they're selling a spiritual gift, which is why it's hard. So God gave me spiritual gifts, the same way he gave a lot of believers spiritual gifts. I don't sell my spiritual gifts, I sell an actual offer. So, woman of all, we didn't go there because Sarah has the gift of prophecy. She didn't sell us that, she sold us a conference. So that's the offer. Now, once we got to the conference, the energy in the room transformed because of the gifts that she put on stage, not just hers, but the gifts of all the other speakers that she had. So your gift makes your offer a supernatural success, but you sell your offer, not the gift offer a supernatural success, but you sell your offer, not the gift.
Speaker 1:So where I see believers ramming their heads against the wall is they're like I'm so gifted, I'm so anointed, I can speak in tongue, I can pray a house down, I can do that. I'm like, yes, honey, but you have not packaged an offer. And so they're like God told me to start a business, exactly, but now you need to get the skill of packaging an offer. And that is a different skill, and lots of Christians are being not lots, but there are some Christian entrepreneurs that believe that Jesus is a genie. So they think, like I'm going to go in my prayer closet, I'm going to rub this little thing and I'm going to pray for this business and I'm going to wake up and he's just going to send a check in the mail, and so often we hear stories. Well, he sent a check for $5,000 and now I get that yes, he sent man up. But that should not be your sustaining source. You need to work on a skill. You need to take what the Holy Spirit gave you and then, from there, ask him to give you discernment about where you can learn and develop and hone your skill.
Speaker 1:Even Jesus, who's literally Jesus, didn't go straight into itinerant ministry. He perfected a skill. He was a carpenter. I assume he had to learn some skills to be a carpenter. He had to steward that well and then he was elevated.
Speaker 1:And so I think that a lot of us want to go straight into these supernatural things without preparation, and that's why we struggle. If you would just calm down, baby, calm down, you got the vision. That's good. Write that vision, make it plain and then get to work. Get to work Because I don't want a lottery type of life. I want sustainable success. There's a reason why the majority of people who win the lottery can't sustain the wealth. There's also a reason why the majority of people who are in the NFL actually end up broke. They were high school players. They had a great skill, but managing money is a different skill, and if they didn't hone that skill the same way they hone the skill of getting that athleticism up, then it becomes very difficult to sustain it. So you need skills on top of gifts. You can transform a gift into a skill, but that's where education and deliberate practice comes in, and I don't see a lot of us doing the deep work of getting excellent.
Speaker 1:I don't want people to buy from me because I'm a Christian. Hire me, not because I'm a Christian lawyer, but because I am the best lawyer you've met. Don't work with me because I'm a Christian coach. I don't even promote that Because it attracts people who think that means you don't have to pay. Now, my clients are also a majority Christian, so I don't hide the fact that I have the Holy Spirit. I don't hide any of that. But you are going to buy this offer. You will benefit from the spiritual gifts as a byproduct of you buying the offer, but I'm not selling you that I can prophesy. I'm not selling you that I can preach. I'm selling you an offer and typically that is an event.
Speaker 1:That is executive coaching. We have executive masterminds and when you come in, module one isn't going to be how to get a prayer through. Module one is going to be mindset. We're going to teach you the science of how your brain works. Then we're going to go on to module two and then we're going to teach you okay, this is how you create an offer. This is what prospecting is.
Speaker 1:Prospecting is the art of finding people to sell to. Then we're going to teach you about pitching. Pitching is how do you actually communicate with those people so that they either buy something or get on a sales call. Then we're going to teach you how to draft a sales script, because if you have a script, you aren't the only one who can do that call. Anyone you hire can read that script and close a deal. Then we're going to teach you how to onboard a client. So notice, these are tangible things. Now, the fact that I am a Christian means that I can pray over that curriculum and say well, lord, am I missing anything? Show me what they're struggling with. So I can make sure that I put it in this offer. But it's not going to be. I'm going to just come and make you feel good. Then you're going to go home and be like, well, I still don't know how to sell nothing.
Speaker 2:And that is what a lot of Christian business conferences are, a lot of business conferences in general, but specifically Christian. Yes A lot of just love and inspiration that you could have got on YouTube.
Speaker 1:And here's the truth. Here's the truth. If you play certain chords on a record, you can get an atheist to cry. Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1:It's just science, like there's science behind. Even. There's something called neuroplasticity, which basically says you can reshape your brain with immersion. So when you go to an event and it's multiple days one of the things that's happening is your belief is building because you're in an environment that accommodates that belief building. But then if you add music on top of that, and then if you add community on top of that, and then if you add the fact that everyone kind of believes the same thing on top of that, anything can happen because belief has built.
Speaker 1:Belief is one of the most powerful things on the planet, whether you are a Christian or not. So this is where discernment comes in. Is that? It can't be? I just had an emotional experience. It's did your life sustainably change when you got home? And here's what science says. Science says if you go to a three-day event, like we're having Speak your Way to Cash Live, you're going to feel bigger than you've ever felt. But then science says that if you go back to an environment it does not accommodate that change. Typically the same, the same neurons that were, that were transformed in that time, that started to transform. They can go back to their old way. Yeah, which is why I've always believed in always investing in myself, like I'm always in an environment that's moving me forward, that's shaping me. I'm always gonna be affiliated with the church family. I'm always in an environment that's moving me forward, that's shaping me. I'm always going to be affiliated with the church family. I'm always going to do that because you don't want to get out of community for that reason, but I also share that to say everything that feels like God is it, and you need to make sure that you're learning skills that you can take with you along the way that will help change your life. Yeah, I'm going to tell you something else, since we go in there, tell me, tell me Now.
Speaker 1:This guy named Alex Hermosi did this a hundred million dollar launch. I don't know if you've heard of this, but basically he sold a hundred million dollars worth of books by using. He has good sales skills, good marketing skills. He spent like $4 million on ads, $24 million on the whole launch. He made $100 million. So he probably $105 million, so he probably netted like $70-something million. I thought that was amazing. Right, I was like this is great. I studied it a little bit. I didn't watch the whole thing because I was on vacation. But whatever, I studied enough, I did a recap on it gave people his book, bought like 600 copies or 6 800 copies total of his book, gave it away to people in my audience.
Speaker 1:A christian lady saw that I did this and I guess alex made some comment. This is this guy is not my friend or mentor or guide, right? He made some negative comment. The woman makes a youtube video and is like, as christians, we should not be looking at this. This is bad christians because this guy is doesn't even believe in God. And how can you learn from someone who doesn't believe in God? And I was like well, even the Bible teaches us the ways of the devil. Mm-hmm, I'm not saying Alex is the devil. I don't know what that man believes and I do not care because he's not my spiritual guide. One of the issues I see with believers is that we make everyone our spiritual guide, which is why we're easily swayed. If you have a pastor, that is who you have said is your spiritual guide.
Speaker 1:That is your spiritual covering. If you have small groups and the pastor has it set up, where you have an elder and you have a small group leader and that person is your spiritual guide, then that is your spiritual guide. Anyone else you're just learning skills and principles from.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:I can learn from people I don't like.
Speaker 2:Yes, or don't agree with or don't like. Or don't agree with or don't agree with.
Speaker 1:If we are regulated to only learn from believers, then the Bible wouldn't even talk about what the Pharisees and Sadducees did. Literally, there are biblical stories about people who were not believers so that we can learn, and our true spiritual guide is the Holy Spirit. On top of that, the book that we go by, our rule book for ethical principle spiritual, is the Bible. So I of that, the book that we go by, our rule book for ethical principles spiritual, is the bible. So I'm not looking for a marketer to teach me the bible. What are we talking about? It's so true and people tag me it's a ashley. Are you still gonna give what he's been? Look at what he said. I'm sorry. Do you think I need my morality to be instructed by a?
Speaker 2:marketer, and this is why so many people have issues that they have with politics, but that's a whole other story, for another time, because you're looking for a politician to be that part and my pastor isn't my ceiling, no no. And my pastor ain't my daddy or my husband. It's a whole lot, and my pastor ain't my God.
Speaker 1:It's a whole lot, so he's going to mess up. He's not going to be perfect. You cannot put people on pedestals and that is why people lose the faith. And I have to remind myself all the time. Every time I look at God, I stay solid. Every time I look at people, I get wavery. It doesn't matter who it is.
Speaker 2:You get wavery, you go under. Listen, I have two questions that I got to ask you. One we always end with, but one I heard you say in one of your youtube videos you were talking about how, so many times, people want friends and community but they don't want to pay for it. They don't um, I am a person who has never been a part of a mastermind okay, okay. So people like me, yeah, watch this podcast. They want to grow. Maybe they have. I have amazing friends and amazing community and all that whoop-de-woo, but that doesn't mean that I have the friendships and relationships that are going to take me where I need to go. I want you to speak to people like that about joining a mastermind. It doesn't have to be yours, but sell yours the benefits of that and the benefits of paying for an event like Speak your Way to Cash. Sell them on why they should.
Speaker 1:I think the first question that anyone who wants to invest in something needs to ask is why, like there are some people who are at the point in their life, I call it. There are three identities in the world watching this podcast right now. The first identity is the doubter. This is the person that, whenever an opportunity comes to them, they poke holes in it. This isn't real. This can't work. They're trying to take my money. I would do that, but I can't because of this reason. This is the person who is addicted to excuses.
Speaker 1:Doubters typically bring down other people in their sphere. They have friends who will talk to them, but not for too long. And if you have a big idea, this is not your first call. But that person, that person, is everywhere. So you have your doubters, then you have your dabblers. This is probably what most of your audience is. These are people who are 50% in, 50% out on their dreams, on their jobs, on everything. These are people that make health goals. They be in and out, in and out, in and out. They make business and revenue goals. They're in and out, in and out, in and out, like 50% of the time they get it right, 50% of the time they don't get it right. So this is the person that can be saved, though, because if you're a dabbler, that means that there's always something persisting within you that's like I gotta do more, and then we have our decided. These are the people who already know who they are and they're willing to do anything to make it happen.
Speaker 1:There's a book called the Science of Scaling by Dr Benjamin Hardy. It's such a good book. What he says is that you have to have impossible goals, and an impossible goal is one that, on your own, you don't even think you can reach, but an impossible goal forces you to have different behavior to reach that goal. When you're decided, you're going to do different. So if you've never invested before, then what's your next move is To invest in yourself, and you could start where you're at, because there's some people who like well, I can't afford it, and it's like well, I asked them this question if you had to come up with fifty thousand dollars to save the life of someone you love, would you? Every single person says yes. So why don't you think you could come up with fifty thousand dollars to save your own life? Not the life you have, but the life that you are leaving behind that. You are not living because you are dabbling on your future.
Speaker 1:There is a version of every single person watching this that can do more, live more, be more. That is the life that you need to pay to save. You need to pay to save that life. That life is yours and what most women, particularly us. We will move heaven and earth to get our kid into a private school. We'll move heaven and earth to pay for our mom to get a procedure. We'll move heaven and earth to get our kid into a private school. We'll move heaven and earth to pay for our mom to get a procedure. We'll move heaven and earth for everybody else, but when it is our life on the line, we can never find the money because we feel like there'll be time to help ourselves later, but what if there's not? Like the average person lives until what? 74?
Speaker 2:And what if other people are depending on you helping yourself?
Speaker 1:Other people are depending on you helping yourself. I'm going to tell you, when I lost 25 pounds, everyone in my family started to think about well, how can I eat healthier? I want you like I don't know who this is for, but like there are some of you that have been running your business for over 10 years and have not made $100,000. Do you know, the average business that makes a million dollars does it in seven years, if they ever do it. Why is that? Because after that seven year mark, what's typically happening is you're getting stuck in your ways and so you're deciding that I'm not going to do anything different and you make you make up an identity in your mind that this is just where I'm at. Yeah, you start believing the lie of the enemy, that you can't go further, and so, if you've never invested in yourself, what that means is you've never put your money where your dreams are. If you were a startup company and you were pitching to venture capital funds, which are just big, big companies that have money, that invest in small businesses and they take a percentage, if you were to, if you were to tell them hey, invest in my business, I want $200,000 for 50%, you know what they're going to say Where'd you get that valuation? Well, I've put $400,000 in this business. I put a million dollars in this business of my own money. But if you say I've put nothing in my own business, they're going to say if you don't believe in it, why would I? And that is exactly what your customers are thinking. They have seen you for the last decade, five years, seven years, 10 years. Look like you're doing the same thing. You haven't put enough in. So now they're thinking if she won't invest in her own business, why would I give her my money? And if you can't coach yourself or talk yourself out of a different financial situation, how can they trust you to steward their life? Yeah, which is what they're doing when they invest with you. They're letting you invest in a portion of their life. Yeah, so it's critical for me.
Speaker 1:The first time I invested in myself um at a high level and joined a master, I think it was $25,000 and that was the most I'd ever spent on education. So I thought but think about it. We spend 40 grand a year on college and it doesn't teach us how to sell anything. I spent $65,000 a year on law school and at graduation my first law school the average salary was $65,000. After nine months of graduation I spent that $25,000, man, I made over a million dollars that first year.
Speaker 1:I have a client that worked with us. She made over a million dollars her first year in our program. She learned actual strategic action on how to grow her business. We cover sales, we cover marketing, we cover operations, and then the silent success principle that we cover is spirituality and mindset. And spirituality can mean a lot of things to a lot of people. I believe in jesus christ. Yes, my mom hosts a monthly bible study that teaches the actual bible, call it what you call it. And then we have a neuroscientist that comes in once a month and helps them with mindset principles, and it is a $50,000 mastermind. Sometimes we have specials that we run at our events, like a Speak your Way to Cash Live, where people can get in for a little bit less, and then we have a $100,000 tier and it is more than worth it.
Speaker 1:I was looking at the numbers of the women who renewed. Many of them it's their third or fourth year in our program and over 75% have renewed for the last two years. Renewed for the last two years. Proof is in the pudding. I love that. People are not going to keep not at that level. They're not going to keep paying you that. So I would just say give yourself a chance to go to the next level. Yeah, that's good Give a.
Speaker 2:Give yourself a chance, let yourself in, let the opportunity to go to the next level. You've given me a lot to think about, and I what you talked about when it comes to us not feeling like we can invest in ourselves or feeling like we don't have the money, but then if something came up and we needed to find it, we would find it.
Speaker 2:It's so important. Speak your Way to Cash October 2nd through the 4th here in Atlanta, georgia. By the time this comes out, it may be sold out, because that's kind of how our events go, but if it's not, you should definitely get a ticket and go to Speak your Way to Cash it. You should definitely get a ticket and go to Speak your Way to Cash. It's something that I'm super interested in. I have another engagement around that time, but I'm going to try to figure something out Because I really do believe in what you have going on.
Speaker 2:Just after watching your personal content, I just see the passion, the gift. As I said when we started this podcast, you know what you're talking about and you look like me. You know you're a black woman. That's super important and I wanted my audience to see that we ask a question to end off our show. Okay, and that question is in the grand scheme of things, what do you want your legacy to be?
Speaker 1:mmm, I've thought about this. Increased confidence for women worldwide. Hmm, yeah, I think if we could, if we could fix belief, we could change the world. And there are so many women watching your show and just out in the world who are world changers, but they're just not confident enough to tell anybody. So there are issues that our nation needs solved that people could solve, but they are not confident enough to speak up. So if we could fix that, then everyone could walk in their own lane with authority and put in the work to be who they really are, and the world would literally be a better place. So if our content helps you to build confidence, if our events help you to build confidence, if my coaching helps you to build confidence, then I'm doing my job. I want that to be the legacy and then, of course, that will lead people to Christ, because everything we do that is at the foundation.
Speaker 1:But, even that if we can build belief, you believe bigger in God. So it's really that, like I think that's what I'm put on this earth to do is to show women you can build confidence, like wherever you're at in the world.
Speaker 2:I love that your daughter is a very blessed young lady. Oh, thank god, I think about um growing up. Had I seen a certain level of confidence in my mom and my mom was amazing, but she had her own struggles with self-confidence and things and she's talked about it um, I would be even more confident, I'd be even more further along and I think one of the my desires of God allows me to have a daughter is that she will never know a woman who doesn't believe in her ability to change the world, because I believe very much in what God has put me here to do.
Speaker 2:I'm very sure about what I'm supposed to be doing, um, and even when the the methods change, the purpose never changes. For me. Because it's changed a few times. The methods have changed, but I really do love how you walk in light.
Speaker 1:I think our kindred spirits found each other in that room, for sure.
Speaker 2:And I'm just excited to see all that you're going to do, all that you're going to continue to do. I love how you talked about how you know. At one point you know you desired to make $30,000. Now your payroll is $60,000. These are things that we need to hear.
Speaker 1:And that's not even big. There's someone who watches that and they be like $60,000, I'd rather $60,000, you know. And so that's why you got to keep, you got to let God stretch you because it's like what I think is a lot isn't a lot to where I'm going, yeah. And so I always say I can't pray for big if small is taking me out. And I'll tell you this I know you said earlier like some women struggle with am I being a traditional mom?
Speaker 1:But I was reading about Ida B Wells and she was one of the preeminent writers on lynching back in the day. This is probably like in the 1800s or something. So I don't have the exact date, but she has an autobiography out and she says that when she was traveling around speaking, she was a wife and a mom. She had a traveling nanny. So she was traveling around speaking in the 1800s about, like the abolitionist movement and lynching and racist this and what we should do differently and how we should make changes. And she had a traveling nanny and when I read that, and her husband was a lawyer and she married a man who was a successful man in his own right, who supported her being a successful woman in the 1800s. So that's it's kind of a lie a little bit of what a traditional mom was. Yeah, cause that was back in the day. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So while there were women back in the day at home cooking and cleaning, there were also sisters back in the day with traveling nannies.
Speaker 1:Yeah, feeling great about it. Listen, I'm from the carry the legacy and the tradition on right, so I stand on the shoulders of ida b wells and of my mom and her mom and all the moms who came before me. I saw my mom get help, so I don't feel guilty about it and so it's a blessing that we're here, but y'all, we gotta got to get some help, yeah.
Speaker 2:I love that. I love that, as we close out, what's one thing? If you could say one thing to your audience the people who are already a part of what you do about the impact that they're making in the world, what would you tell them?
Speaker 1:Ooh, I would say keep going, keep going would say keep going, keep going. I would say that you know, I know that it is not easy being an entrepreneur, but I am thankful that everyone in our community has been using their gifts, because I've had clients where I have learned things from them, like I've hired one of my clients to do an options trading workshop with me a VIP day and because she was walking in her gift, she was helping me. I have another client who's a leadership coach. I was like girl, send me an invoice Because she's walking in her gifts, she'll be able to help me.
Speaker 1:And you have your clients on your podcast giving us information as well.
Speaker 1:So I would just say keep going. I'm proud of you. The world needs your voice and whenever you feel like it's taking too long to get quote unquote big, know that your process is preparing you for bigger than what you think big is right now, that literally, it could be a decade of work and you feel like nothing has happened. And on one day, one email, one phone call could drastically change everything. So don't lose hope. I think that it's so easy for the enemy to implant oh well, you're not big enough, it's not happening fast enough. You won't get there. So I would say don't lose hope. You're changing the world. You're doing exactly what you should be doing, and even if you feel like you're doing what you should not be doing, god's going to use that to get you on path. Okay, like it all works together for the good of those that believe. So keep believing. You are already changing the world. The scale of which you'll change the world has still yet to be seen. Yeah, dope, dope.
Speaker 2:Tell the people where to find you where to find more information about you where to follow you, definitely Okay.
Speaker 1:So you can find me at speakyourwaytocashcom. I'm on Instagram at the Ashley Nicole Show and everything else is linked in the link in my bio. And if you go to the link in my bio, you'll be able to get the first part of my book for free, and we have a free school community called speak your way to cash. And then what I'll do for everyone in your community you could use code. Just let myself in one word and I'll give you guys 30% off. Speak your way to cash live. We are down to our last 30 tickets. I will say that, but if you see this, before then.
Speaker 2:The event's october 2nd to the 4th in atlanta. I'd love for you to be my guest and, yeah, that'll help y'all with ticket prices. I love that. Thank you so much. Listen, I know you to be a very charitable person, even for other things. You've offered people offline that people don't get to see conversations that you have like she's the real deal y'all. Y'all know I don't bring anybody up in here, that ain't you know. So I just really appreciate you. I look forward to learning more from you, virtually and in person. We'll talk. I'm going to get myself together, yes, and sell something. Yeah, because I don't sell a thing. What do you sell? I don't sell nothing, that's the tip Y'all everybody.
Speaker 2:You need an offer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you need to pitch that offer and you need to make money. Okay, so before you launch anything, I want you to think like what am I going to sell and I wouldn't do? If your audience is big, you can sell something lower ticket and still be profitable. If your audience is small, you have to sell something higher ticketed to be profitable.
Speaker 2:Okay, we're going to talk yes, we're going to talk off camera because, because I need clearly Because you need to offer, so listen.
Speaker 2:So when I start offering, y'all don't act funny, okay, because y'all see, in here I'm going to learn how to offer. But no, this has been so informative and just in my time researching you and what you do, I've learned so much, so you know yes, pay to come to the event, but if, for some reason, you're not, just not in a space in this season, yeah, there's so much content and gain that ashley is giving out on her youtube 2500 free videos on youtube go watch the videos because the stuff that I was telling my husband like I'm like, yeah, we got, we got to change some things yeah
Speaker 2:just from what I watched on your youtube, um, as a person who's only been in business for about a year. So, yes, go ahead and watch the content. Thank you so much for being here. I feel like I can keep talking to you forever and ever, but we do have to end the episodes because the radio has a certain. We might make this a two-parter, who knows? But thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 2:Listen, if you're a part of my audience, if you're a part of my community, you know that my passion and my desire is that you are not waiting. You're not waiting on somebody else to give you permission to be the person that God has called you to be. The reason that I started this podcast and named it I'll Just Let Myself In is because for so long, I was waiting for someone to give me the green light to be who I already was, and when God finally gave me, when the Holy Spirit finally gave me the revelation, you can just let yourself in, you can just walk through the door. That's what I did, and you guys who've been watching from the beginning, you know that very quickly, god started to show me oh, you're wanted in different spaces and in different rooms and even right now in this season, he's still elevating me. So allow that to be an encouragement to you, allow that to be inspirational to you, but allow it to make you act. Walk through those God-given doors.
Speaker 2:If you have listened on holy culture channel 140, sirius XM, 8 pm eastern standard time on a Monday night, we thank you so much for listening there. If you watch on their YouTube, we thank you for watching there. And if you're watching on my YouTube, thank you for watching and subscribing, hitting that notification bell so you don't miss any of the content that we have. Make sure that you follow Ashley. We're going to tag all of the books that she mentioned. Make sure that we tag all of her pages so that you guys can get what you need from her and that you can learn how to speak your way to cash while I learn the same thing. Uh, thanks so much for listening, thanks so much for watching, and we'll be here again same time, same place next week. Peace, don't bring no drama my way.