Growth Instigators Hotline

#294 I hope you’re not addicted to this…

• Aaron Havens • Season 3 • Episode 294

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Are you secretly addicted to being needed? That constant stream of calls, emails, and team members at your door might feel like validation of your importance, but it's actually a warning sign of leadership failure.

In this powerful Growth Instigators Hotline message, we tackle the uncomfortable truth that many leaders face: the trap of always being the go-to person. As John C. Maxwell wisely observed, "If you're the only one who can do it, you have not done your job as a leader." We explore the psychological hooks that keep us tethered to this unhealthy pattern – the allure of control, the validation of problem-solving, and the fear of becoming dispensable.

But this isn't just about identifying the problem. We dive into three transformative strategies to break free from the dependency cycle: stopping the confusion between control and genuine care, asking more questions instead of providing all the answers, and systematically teaching your team to function without your constant presence. The true measure of leadership isn't how essential you are to daily operations – it's how well things run when you're not there.

Whether you're leading a small team or an entire organization, this episode provides the wake-up call and practical guidance needed to shift from being indispensable to being truly impactful. The goal isn't to be irreplaceable. The goal is to build something that grows beyond you. Ready to make that shift? Listen now, and then ask yourself: what's one thing you can delegate, release, or systematize this week? Your leadership journey – and your sanity – depend on it.

Visit growthinstigators.com to schedule a discovery call and get support in breaking the bottlenecks holding back your organization's growth.

Speaker 1:

I hope you're not addicted to this. Welcome to message 294 of the Growth Instigators Hotline, where we ignite your personal and professional development. I'm Aaron Havens, your host and growth coach. Let's dive into today's insight.

Speaker 1:

Thriving Growth Thursday the trap of always being needed. Are you leading or just constantly putting out fires? Leadership author John C Maxwell once said if you're the only one who can do it, you have not done your job as a leader. Being the go-to person can feel like a badge of honor, but over time, always being needed becomes a trap. You're constantly accessible, constantly solving, constantly drained. Hold up. Why is that? Are you addicted to control Power, feeling important If your team can't function without you? That's not leadership, that's dependency. And might I ask who built it to be like that? Is this what you want? Is that healthy? Here are three ways to lead with growth in mind.

Speaker 1:

Number one stop confusing control with care. Doing everything yourself doesn't make you a better leader. It just makes you unavailable for the work only you can do. Empowerment beats micromanagement every time. Number two ask more, solve less. Instead of jumping in with the answers, try asking what do you think would work here? You'll be surprised how often solutions are already in the room. They just need permission to speak. And last today. Number three teach people how to move.

Speaker 1:

Without you, if you were out for a week, would it all fall apart? Build systems, train others and delegate authority, not just tasks. The goal isn't to be irreplaceable. The goal is to build something that grows beyond you. Here's what I want you to do today. Pause and ask yourself where have I made myself a bottleneck and what's one thing I can delegate, release or systemize this week?

Speaker 1:

If your leadership requires you to be everywhere at all times, it might be time to lead differently and you want a bonus piece of wisdom today. A sure sign you could be bottlenecking is if your phone is ringing nonstop and your inbox is continually getting more and more. It might be time to scale. Thank you for calling Go Th Growth Instigators Hotline. I'd love to hear from you. Leave a message after the beep or send an email to Aaron at growthinstigatorscom and let me know where are you still holding too tightly? What shift would free up your energy and help someone else grow? And if your organization needs help untangling leadership bottlenecks and building systems that scale, I'd love to support that process. Visit growthinstigatorscom and let's schedule a discovery call, as always, keep instigating growth in all you do.