Challenge Your Mind, Change The World
A Parent's Portal to Learn How to Develop Critical Thinking Skills at Home, Communication Strategies & How Young People Can Find Their Voice - collated from years of experience of a high school teacher.
Welcome to "Challenge Your Mind, Change the World" a podcast specifically designed for parents who are eager to foster a culture of critical thinking and academic excellence within their home. Hosted by The Classic High School Teacher, a seasoned English Literature, Drama, Social Studies and Ancient History teacher and a distinguished writer of teaching resources with over 20 years experience, as well as extensive experience in the business world, this podcast aims to bridge the gap between parental support, academic success and life beyond school for our next generation.
In today’s rapidly changing educational and business landscapes, the ability to think critically is not just a skill but a necessity for academic achievement and beyond. Each episode of our podcast delves into practical strategies, insightful discussions, and actionable advice on how parents can effectively encourage and nurture critical thinking skills in their teenagers as well as learning how to balance life out of school, and well being.
We focus on simplifying complex theories of critical thinking into manageable lessons that can be easily integrated into daily academic support, as well as other pressures currently facing teenagers and their families.
By listening to our podcast, you will discover:
- Expert techniques to enhance critical thinking and problem-solving skills in teenagers.
- Engaging methods to inspire a love for learning and intellectual curiosity.
- Tips for fostering effective communication and argumentation skills for academic essays and discussions.
- Real-world applications of critical thinking skills for academic success and lifelong learning.
- Preparation for life beyond High School
Join us on this journey to empower your teenager to excel both socially and personally by mastering the art of critical thinking. Together, we can lay a solid foundation for their success, not just in school, but in life.
Challenge Your Mind, Change The World
Speaking with Confidence – How to Help Your Teen Find Their Voice
Today's podcast episode teaches you the secrets to empowering teens with the confidence to conquer communication challenges head-on.
Imagine a world where your teen speaks with self-assurance, no longer shackled by the fear of judgment or a fixed mindset about their abilities.
Join Francesca as she unpacks effective strategies inspired by Dr. Carol Dweck’s research, tackling the impact of school environments and social media on teenagers' communication skills.
By encouraging the habit of thinking out loud, teens can learn to express themselves more openly, transforming nervousness into confidence.
Step into the realm of low-pressure public speaking with personal anecdotes from drama classes that showcase the power of everyday interactions.
Francesca introduces the power voice method, a transformative technique to enhance public speaking, and reveals the launch of the Confidence to Lead Academy—a dynamic course crafted to nurture future leaders.
As we wrap up, don't miss the invitation to join the open waitlist and stay tuned for more episodes packed with insights to help your teen discover their unique voice and confidently step into leadership roles.
CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE CONFIDENCE TO LEAD ACADEMY WAITLIST
If you enjoyed today's episode, please take the time to rate our podcast. Your rating means the world to us and it allows us to continue to share and grow our message of support to other fabulous humans out there!
Confidence to Lead Academy is coming soon! This is THE subscription your teen needs to be on if they are shy, full of potential yet lack the confidence to explore it, or dream of having a life where they can learn how to step up and be heard, but just need that little extra nudge to do so. The Confidence to Lead Academy is all about giving your teen a voice that helps them speak up in class, push themselves out of their comfort zone and begin to develop real leadership skills that will help them long after school finishes. The waitlist has opened - learn more here!
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Welcome back to Challenge your Mind, change the World, the podcast where we explore how to raise thoughtful, confident and capable teens who can navigate life with curiosity and courage. I'm Francesca, your host and CEO, the Classic High School Teacher, and today we are tackling a challenge that so many parents face how to help your teen speak with confidence. And I really wanted to talk about this episode today because, as a drama and performing arts teacher, which was one of the many subjects that I taught at high school, I used to find that getting teenagers to be able to be confident in their speaking in class wasn't always easy, and so I wanted to talk about this topic today, because maybe you've noticed that your teen is hesitant to get involved in class or to get involved at school, or maybe they struggle to contribute to group discussions at home or group discussions when you're out and about with friends. Maybe your teen avoids eye contact when they're speaking or they're mumbling their words. Maybe they're unsure of how they'll be received and, let's be real, sometimes shyness really kicks in, and our kids won't even order their own food at a restaurant. So if this sounds familiar, you're not alone, my friend, speaking up, whether in school or in social situations or in leadership settings can feel really intimidating. But here's the good news Confidence in speaking isn't a personality trait, I promise you it's not. It's a skill and just like any skill, it can be strengthened. With the right approach, we can change it. We can encourage and really build the confidence of our teenagers and our children, because it's not just teenagers, it's what comes before the teenage years as well, which is just as important, and we can strengthen those skills.
Speaker 1:So in today's episode, we're going to unpack why so many teens struggle with speaking confidence. We're going to unpack why so many teens struggle with speaking confidence. We're going to look at the psychology behind self-assurance in communication and we're going to look at the simple, science-backed strategies that parents can use, that you can use at home as a parent, to help your teen find their voice. So if you want to raise a teen, a tween or a child anybody, if you've got children at home of any age, if you want to raise them so that they can walk into any room, speak up and own their own voice, then this episode is for you.
Speaker 1:Let's start with a question why do some teens seem naturally confident when speaking, while others shrink into the background? And I remember I know from my own experience when we had to do speech assessments at school. Every year there were speech assessments from year nine through to year 11. And everybody used to be so nervous about it. All my students used to be so nervous about it. It doesn't matter what age they were, whether they were year nine, which in the States is year eight, or through to year 11, which is the first class in senior school in New Zealand, and everybody used to be nervous.
Speaker 1:Here's the reality. Most teens aren't quiet because they have nothing to say. They're quiet because they doubt their ability to say it well or they fear how others will perceive them. Now, according to one of my favorite doctors on research on mindset, dr Carol Dweck, her research found that teens who lack speaking confidence often have a fixed mindset about their ability to communicate. They think I'm just not a good speaker. What if I embarrass myself? People will judge me if I say something wrong. Now we can look at the science behind this fixed mindset In a study from the American Psychological Association found that fear of public speaking activates the brain's amygdala, which is the center responsible for processing fear in our brains, and this triggers a fight or flight response, causing racing heartbeats, sweaty palms, dry mouth, brain freeze.
Speaker 1:For many teens, this response happens even in very small conversations, not just in big public speeches, where you have to stand at the front of the classroom and all eyes are on you. So we need to look at this. This is really important because it's affecting our teenagers in everyday life, and here's what makes it worse. School emphasizes correct answers over confident expression, making our teens feel afraid of saying the wrong thing. Social media also adds to this. It compounds. It's created a culture of comparison where teenagers are constantly worrying about how they sound in front of their peers and also.
Speaker 1:Parents unfortunately often unknowingly reinforce fear by speaking for their teens instead of encouraging them to speak for themselves. And I am guilty of this. I do this all the time and I always have to check myself, especially when we're going out and we're meeting people for the first time and we're making a little bit of small talk. I will jump in if my son doesn't say anything, just to basically fill the silence. So we all do it, but we need to be able to be confident in our children's ability to use their voice. Now here's the good news. Confidence is not about being perfect. It's about practice, and today I'm going to share some powerful strategies to help your team break through the fear and own their own voice. So good. So the first strategy that I'm going to teach you today is we're going to teach them to think out loud. We're going to teach our kids to think out loud.
Speaker 1:Now, a lot of teens hesitate to speak because they think that their ideas need to be fully formed before they say them. But here's the truth Confident speakers aren't the ones who know everything. They're the ones who are comfortable thinking out loud. It's such a good habit to get into at home. It might drive other people in the house nuts because they might think that you're talking to them. We do this in our house a lot, but we are all thinkers who think out loud, and I think it's a great thing. So here's how to help. We can encourage our children and our teens to express half-formed thoughts. Now, what I mean by this is, if they say, I don't know what to say, we can respond with that's okay. What's one thing you're thinking about right now? Or you could model it yourself so you could say things like I'm not sure how to explain this yet, but here's what I'm thinking dot dot, dot right. Or we could praise effort, not perfection. So when our children and our teenagers do speak up, we can celebrate the fact that they tried, regardless of how perfect it was. Just shower them with praise the fact that they're actually thinking and they're contributing to the conversation and they're giving their input, and this teaches them that their voice matters, even if their thoughts aren't completely fully polished just yet.
Speaker 1:Now my second strategy is what I call the three-second rule for speaking up. Have you ever seen your teen hesitate to answer a question in class, only to miss their chance? Now, I know that, as parents listening, you won't be seeing your teenagers in class, but when you're having a parent-teacher interview, it's something that you can ask the teacher. What is your teenager like at speaking up in class? Or think about a social situation? Do you? When you go out for dinner or catching up with friends, do you notice your teenager hesitating to answer a question?
Speaker 1:Well, if that is true, well, I've got a trick for you. We're going to teach our kids the three second rule. So if they've got something to say, they count to three and then they say it. No overthinking, no second guessing, just go for it. It's basically allowing our kids the space to breathe, to put together their thoughts and then to say them out loud. And it goes back to what I was saying before about us, as adults and parents, wanting to jump in and answer questions for them.
Speaker 1:Teenagers take a little bit longer, need a little bit more time, a little bit more breathing space to be able to answer the question. So we're teaching them to count to three and then say it, and this means that they're not going to be overthinking things, they're not going to be second guessing themselves, they're just going to go for it. They're just going to have a go at answering the question. Now, why this works. Well, I've got a study report for you from UCLA's Center for Communication which found that delaying a response increases self-doubt. Right? So if you're sitting there chewing over the answer in your mind should I answer it, should I not then you are, by delaying that response, you are increasing your own self-doubt, overthinking it. We do this as adults too. I'm a terrible overthinker. I'm always overthinking things. I mean, sometimes what feels like a spontaneous decision for me is actually my husband saying don't overthink it, just do it. And it is so true, and in the nicest possible way. This is what we need to model and scaffold for our children and our teenagers. So by telling them to count to three and then answer it, it means they're not going to just sit there agonizing over whether or not they're going to be right by answering the question. So the longer that teenagers hesitate, the more likely they are to talk themselves out of speaking. So let's practice this at home During dinner. I challenge you to ask your children or your teenagers a random question like what's the best movie ever? Totally random, and then have them answer it within three seconds. Make it into a game. Have a stopwatch out, see who's the fastest to answer, you know, turn it into a bit of a competition. I've got boys at home. They love competition, so everything just turns into a competition in our house. But by practicing this at home, it builds reflexive confidence, which is the ability to trust their own voice, and that is building confidence. So good, now my third strategy. I've got four of them, by the way. So this is number three Strategy. Number three is their low stakes speaking, which leads to high confidence.
Speaker 1:Public speaking Now, what do I mean by that? Most teens fear public speaking because they haven't practiced speaking in low pressure situations, and this is why I used to love drama classes at school. We used to have some classes where it was mainstream English, but we had a couple of drama modules built into it, meaning that students who had opted into those classes got to do a little bit of drama as well as English. And by introducing theatre, sports games and warm-up games at the start of the lessons, my students really got used to speaking in front of each other in really low-pressure situations. It would just be turning the classroom into a real community feel, and you can do that at home as well.
Speaker 1:So the solution is to help our kids, help our teenagers, build confidence in everyday conversations at home. We want to encourage them to order their own food at restaurants. We want to encourage them to ask a store clerk a question when you're out shopping, them to ask a store clerk a question when you're out shopping, or encourage them and this is a hard one, but really encourage them to introduce themselves to new people. Now, research from Stanford showed that teens who practice low stakes speaking so that's the things like casual conversations, ordering their own food, introducing themselves to new people, all of those low stakes speaking develop greater confidence in high stakes situations like presentations and debates. And my bonus tip for you is to think about role play at home. You could ask how would you introduce yourself if you were meeting someone new today and practice the different ways to start conversations. Once again, this could be a great dinner party game, over the dinner table tonight to try it. How would you introduce yourself if you were meeting someone new today and you could put different personality types in? How would you introduce yourself if you were meeting the president today? How would you introduce yourself if you were meeting King Charles today? That kind of thing Make it fun.
Speaker 1:Now my fourth strategy is to help our children and help our teens master their power voice. Have you ever noticed that when teens are nervous, they either mumble or they overcompensate by talking too fast? Here's a technique that works wonders the power voice method. Now here's how. Technique that works wonders the power voice method. Now here's how it works. Step one we're going to lower the speed. Speak 20 slower than normal. This makes them sound more confident and gives their brain time to process thoughts. Get your teen or your tween to start speaking at a lower speed Now.
Speaker 1:Step two is to emphasize key words. So we're going to teach our teens to pause before saying something important, and this increases engagement. You see what I did there. So we want to teach them to pause. And step three we want to breathe before speaking. So a deep breath before talking signals to the brain that it's in control. So, by teaching our tweens and our teens to breathe before speaking, take a deep breath then there's science related to that. It's signaling to the brain that they are in control, and psychology studies confirm that people who speak slower and use intentional pauses are perceived as 30% more confident and credible. Lower the speed, emphasize key words and breathe before speaking. So what you could do at home is you could ask your tween or your teen to read a paragraph from their favorite book with a really strong, steady voice, because this is going to help them feel their own power, get them used to listening to their voice in a new way. Now, at the end of the day, helping your teen find their voice in a new way Now, at the end of the day, helping your teen find their voice isn't just about speaking.
Speaker 1:It's about self-assurance, independence and leadership, because when your teen knows how to express themselves confidently, they will be unstoppable in school, in their friendships in their job interviews and well beyond that. So your challenge this week I challenge you. Your challenge, if you accept it is to try one of these strategies that we've just talked about, these four strategies, with your teen. Maybe it's the three-second rule, or practicing a power voice and then DM me or comment and tell me what worked. I would love to hear how you go then DM me or comment and tell me what worked. I would love to hear how you go.
Speaker 1:Now, talking about communication and helping our teens find their voice, I am putting the finishing touches on a brand new, very, very, very special course very close to my heart. I have created this with my own children in mind, to help them, as well as all of my amazing Classic High School Teacher community of parents. The parents that are in the Classic High School Teacher community are committed. They want the best for their children and they are eager to be able to support them in any way they can, and so this course that I have put together is all about helping your teen to find their voice, to find their confidence. It's called the Confidence to Lead Academy. The waitlist has just opened and I'm taking waitlist names until we are ready to roll it out, which is going to be really, really soon. But if you sign up now to the waitlist, then that means that you are going to be front line for when we do open and there'll be a few extra bonuses and surprises for you that everybody else will miss out on. So you don't want to miss out on that waitlist. I will link it in the show notes.
Speaker 1:That's the Confidence to Lead Academy waitlist, and it is all about empowering our teenagers to become the leaders of tomorrow. It's really important in this digital age. It's really important in this world of AI that's evolving so fast, and if we do not empower our children to find their voice and to be confident in the way that they express themselves in the world, then AI will take over their jobs, they'll take over their confidence and it's going to be a lot harder for them to navigate through a world where so much of what we do now will be redundant in the future. So we need to support our teens, to help them find their voice, help them understand what it means to be a leader, what it means to work in group situations, what it means to thrive in a community situation. All of these things are so important. They're not taught in skills because they're not part of the curriculum, but they're life skills.
Speaker 1:So join me inside Confidence to Lead. The waitlist is open now, and I know you are going to be so thrilled by it. All right, so that's it for today. If you loved this episode, don't forget to hit subscribe and share it with a fellow parent who needs to hear this. I will see you next time on Challenge your Mind, change the World. Bye for now.
