Of Swords and Soulmates

"I Got Abducted..." - Alien Romance, Chaos, a Lion, and a Pink T-Rex

• Mari • Season 2 • Episode 54

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What if aliens tried to rebuild human culture using half-baked research and vibes—and you had to survive it with a lion, two dangerously attractive strangers, and a pink tyrannosaur? We dive into Kimberly Lemming’s Cosmic Chaos debut to unpack how a wildlife biologist becomes the most competent person on a planet that shouldn’t exist, why slapstick can carry real stakes, and how consent and agency still matter when a so-called love serum enters the chat.

We trade favorite set pieces—from crash-landing to cul-de-sacs copy-pasted across the horizon—and dig into the sharper edges hiding under the humor. The “almost-right” suburbia becomes satire of AI mimicry and media pastiche; an ancient war with no remembered cause turns into commentary on propaganda’s long tail. Along the way, we celebrate the audiobook performances, debate whether this counts as a kissing book or a gloriously filthy romp, and crown Toto the lion as the episode’s undisputed MVP. If you love sci-fi romance with riotous banter, found-family warmth, and worldbuilding that winks at our own chaos, this one belongs on your TBR.

We also share quick-hit book news, special editions worth hunting, and upcoming reads, then map who will love this story: fans of Hitchhiker’s Guide energy who want it spicier, readers craving absurdist humor with heart, and anyone who believes laughter is a survival skill. Hit play, laugh with us, and tell us your take: did the chaos win you over, and who stole your heart—Dory, Sol, Locke, or Toto? If you enjoy the show, tap follow, rate and review, and share this episode with a friend who needs a chaotic cosmic getaway.

Links from the News Segment and Show:

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Goodreads - http://www.goodreads.com/ofswordsandsoulmates

Mari:

The views expressed in this podcast are solely those of the hosts. All creative works discussed or reviewed are the intellectual property of the creators of said stories and are being used under the fair use doctrine. I'm one of your hosts, Mari, and with me I have Kelly.

Kelly:

Hey everyone, it's Kelly. We also have Ashley.

Ashley:

Hi guys, it's Ashley. We also have Jonathan.

Jonathan:

What's good, everybody? It's JP. How's everybody doing? I feel like it's been forever.

Mari:

Well, to the listeners, it's been two weeks. So I miss you all. Yes.

Jonathan:

Especially you over there in a corner.

Mari:

Not awkward at all.

Jonathan:

Not awkward at all.

Mari:

Alright, so today we're going to be discussing I Got Abducted by Aliens and Now I'm Trapped in a Rom-Com by Kimberly Lemming, which is book one in the Cosmic Chaos series. But first, as always, some news. We've got some, not a ton, but we do have some. First thing I have is that Fay Crate is doing an opus edition of Jacqueline Hyde's Monster Bay series. So they do these. Fay Crate does, I was about to say prescriptions. Can I get a book prescription? They do subscriptions of like YA or like Adult Romance or whatever. But they also do where they make these special editions of certain books series. Like they did the Opal Rain ones for the Dustwalkers and like the prequel of the Dustwalkers. So that they do a really good job with these Opus series. They're all like super blamed out, you know, beautiful covers, beautiful edges, end papers, all those things. So they're gonna do her Monster Bay series, which includes Your Coffin or Mine, How You Doing, and Stitched Up in You. Uml, Howl at H. H-O-W-L. So we're actually gonna be reading one of these books later in the year. I have read them all and liked them. I really like her writing style. She's the one that we talked about that that's gonna be doing the Locked in Love book. That's like the Lochness Monster. A few episodes back we talked about it.

Jonathan:

Oh yeah.

Mari:

Yeah. So the this this opus of Faye Crate is gonna be available to the public as of March 13th. If you subscribe to their stuff, it's earlier, but to the to us peons, it's gonna be March 13th, 2026. It's $105 and it will ship September of 2026. And the cover art is done by Miss Supesi? Miss Supesi at Miss Supesi. I don't know if I'm saying that right, but that's the artist. They haven't released what they're gonna look like yet. There's no real pictures of it. But if you go back on their website and look at some of their other works that they've done Opus works of, they're they do a really good job.

Jonathan:

Yeah, interesting. I and they're is this this is the monster based stuff? So then they did you say it did you talk about the like the sign tip in pages and like things like that?

Mari:

No, no, any no, I didn't talk about any of that.

Jonathan:

Ribbon bookmarks and stuff like that. It looks like all the things. A comprehensive package.

Ashley:

I was gonna say it's like a concierge service. You're just getting the whole shebang out of it.

Mari:

Yeah. Nice. Yeah, I haven't bought her books, like the physical copies. I bought the ebooks and I listened to them because whoever however she whoever she does the the audio production with does really good job of the audiobook. So I'm like, well, maybe it's maybe it's good that I haven't bought that because I can just buy the opus rather than the standard versions. Um I do believe I should have looked this up ahead of time, but I do believe she's gonna be at Monster Rodica BookCon in May in Baltimore.

Jonathan:

So do we know anybody who will be there? Will you be there?

Mari:

We know several people. Yeah, I'm gonna be there, and the hissin and kissin' crew is gonna be there. So I wish it wasn't so far away.

Jonathan:

Is that both Jess and Sarah going?

Mari:

Yeah. Yeah. Nice. Yeah, so it'll be my first time spending any time in person with Jess. So that'll be cool. I'm looking, I'm I'm going through their their website now and seeing because I I'm almost sure that she's going to be there, but now I'm like, Maybe I imagine that.

Jonathan:

Maybe that's wishful thinking.

Mari:

Um she is gonna be there. Yay! Okay, yeah, she's gonna be there. If anyone likes Monster Romance with Spice, but like in a very humor comedy, but almost like assistant to the villain kind of vibe, that's what the tone of those books are. So they're not scary like at all. And they have really good accents and stuff when you listen to them. Alright, next bit of news is that the cover for BK Borison's Grim Tidings is out. So Grim Tidings is the sequel to Good Spirits that we read in December. It it will officially release September 15th of this year, and the artwork is by Brittany Keller. But I was looking at the description a little bit, and it looks like it's gonna be a Grim Reaper and a Guardian Angel.

Jonathan:

What?

Mari:

Oh yeah. Lot twist. Oh yeah, yeah. The Guardian Angel owns a bar or is working at a bar or something. As one does. Yeah, yeah. So a grim reaper and a guardian angel walk into a bar and you get a book out of it. We'll see. We'll see what that one goes, how that one goes.

Ashley:

I think I'm more intrigued now that I know that.

Mari:

Yeah. So um I'm curious to see when we know more about that. I'd also like to see if there's gonna be special editions of that one, like there were of good spirits. Because I gotta make some decisions of which one I'm gonna buy.

Jonathan:

Choices.

Mari:

Yep. Um next bit of news I have is from Abigail Owens. She has a new book coming out in fall of 2026. It's called The Bone Singer. It releases September of 2026. And the little like blurb description so far is Riverdale meets the craft in a town where secrets don't stay buried and the dead won't stay quiet.

Ashley:

We love Abigail.

Mari:

Yeah.

Ashley:

That sounds like so much fun.

Mari:

I think so. Now, I never watched Riverdale, but I know a lot of people really enjoyed it. I love the craft, so I'm down. Nice. Have you guys finished the Games Gods Play and the sequel? Yes. I think last time we talked, you were reading the sequel still, right?

Ashley:

Yeah, I have not. You know what it is? It's a physical book.

Mari:

Yeah.

Ashley:

So it takes more time, dedicated time to read it. And then I got distracted by other physical books. This one just I don't think overall was speaking to me, but maybe I hadn't gotten far enough in, you know, so there there hasn't been pressure to read it in the way that there's been for some other books. Um so I just I I I I think it's about to get better. I I didn't love where it was, like I just wasn't addicted to it. It was a good story. I just didn't have like the the crack addict response to finish it in a hurry. Okay.

Mari:

Are you gonna read that sequel, Kelly? Do you think? Okay. Um next bit of news I have is uh Funko is doing Cruel Prince Funko's. Yes, I'm very excited about this. So they're doing the Falkout the years. So they're doing Cruel Prince, but they're also doing the other the other two books that I can ever remember the names of. So it's gonna be like Jude and Oh my god, what's his name?

Ashley:

It starts with a C. That's what I was thinking.

Mari:

It starts with a C. I think it's a two big saying it, it would spit out. Jonathan, you read this more recently, haven't you?

Jonathan:

I don't know that I read all the way through. I want to say I think I stopped for some reason.

Ashley:

Destruction.

Jonathan:

It's probably on my desk or my nightstand currently, honestly.

Ashley:

Cardin. Cardin. I wanted to say like crack. Crack was wrong.

Jonathan:

So I that's the one where it's like like a like a human lives in like a fay world.

Mari:

Yeah.

Jonathan:

And then is like kind of bullied.

Mari:

Yep. Yeah. It's like a reverse changeling story, yeah.

Jonathan:

Okay. So like the part was so I think I I I can't remember exactly something else that I wanted to read came out, and then I was like, I'm gonna put you down because there's something else that I want to read. You know what it was? It was probably like around the time we started reading Five Broken Blades.

Mari:

Oh, yeah. Okay. Well, it's a good series, it's a good book, and they're doing Funko's, and I'm so excited because I like Cruel Prince and I love a Funko. So they're gonna be released July 12th. So it's gonna have those characters, but it's also gonna have like Oak and I think her name is Ren from the two books that come after the Cruel Prince series.

Ashley:

Oh, Ren gets his own book? Yes. Or Oak does, I'm sorry. Okay, I need to read those. I didn't read the the others, but I did finish the Cruel Prince series. And for con I didn't love the Cruel Prince until it was taken away from me.

Jonathan:

Um who took it away?

Ashley:

Uh Libby. The life yeah, Libby. Libby plays games.

Jonathan:

How did I end up with it?

Ashley:

Suddenly, well, because you heard about it and you wanted to read it. Suddenly I had it and then I didn't, and I didn't know that I needed it back until I didn't have it. And then I had to wait like a month, and it was dev cause like those the voices on that audiobook too are super unique. And sometimes for me, you I can't go back and forth. Yeah, I needed it, I needed to finish the whole thing in the audiobooks, which I finally eventually had done very rapidly after that. I was like, 'cause Libby wasn't catching me slipping anymore. But yeah, Libby, that was one of the ones that snuck up on me the year that I read that series.

Mari:

Yeah, that's of the I've read several Holly Black books at this point, and that's still my favorite of the Holly Black books I've read is the The Cool Prince um core books.

Ashley:

So I just finished Book of Night, which was interesting to me. I know you said you didn't love it. Yeah. I'm curious to see where it goes. It has a sequel, right? That's the one that has the sequel out.

Mari:

Is it coming out?

Ashley:

Uh it's either just come out or it's about to. Okay.

Mari:

Yeah, I've not read that one. And I'm I'm not sure if the sequel. I'm not sure if I'm going to. We'll see. Right.

Ashley:

Um, but the point, the Cruel Prince was better. Yeah.

Mari:

Yeah. Um next bit of news I have is Paige Lavoie has released the cover and name for her next book series. It's it's My Boyfriend is a Swamp Monster. Finn Fry is the artist. The book itself is going to be released June 13th. But this cover is so pretty.

Ashley:

I feel like most of her covers are though, too. Yeah. She she does I don't, I mean, I don't know who's doing her covers or if she has a final say, but whoever's in charge of that, A plus.

Jonathan:

It is delightful. I'm not super uh again, like the the the the water thing. It's not but like the cover, like I'm attracted to the colors on here. It's very um OB.

Ashley:

OB?

Jonathan:

Pink and blue.

Ashley:

I don't oh, OB.

Jonathan:

Maternity? It's very maternity ward.

Mari:

To me, it has like a almost like a 70s. Was it Lino print or lino cut kind of vibe to it? Regardless, the colors I thought were really pretty.

Jonathan:

I agree.

Mari:

So I'm I'll be reading it. I was gonna be reading anyways when I found out she was gonna be doing a swamp monster one. It's basically Gilman, you know, your creature. But yeah, I'm excited about that one. I was very pulled in by the cover, even if I hadn't been by the synopsis. The last bit of news I have is that the artwork for the paperback version of Julie DeSoto's Rose and Chains has dropped. And it's really pretty. I like it better than the hardcover one. It's like 18 bucks and it ships August 18th. And the cover is by Tasia.m.s. So it's at Tasia MS. I already read the book and I have the hardcover, but I'm like, I do like this paperback version better. It's very pretty.

Ashley:

Did you like it? I haven't read that one.

Mari:

I did, I liked it. It is definitely more serious than the resistance urge to fall for your enemy. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's not necessarily dark, and I still haven't read Alchemiz, so I can't. I mean, I read Managle, but not Alchemiz, so I can't fully compare it. Um But it very much still it feels like its own its own story, its own world. Okay. Yeah, like I I very much want to see where it goes, and I plan to read the rest of it.

Ashley:

Yeah, I don't think I read the original fanfiction that Rosen Chains was retold from. Yeah, me neither. But it's part of that world. Um so I bought it for that reason.

Mari:

But like Irresistible Urge, I feel like it's a it stands on its own. Like I don't feel like you have to know anything about any of the the stuff that inspired it. Like I think I think some of these books were done a disservice by being advertised, and I think this was a public publisher's choice, not a writer's choice. Um but I think they were done a disservice by being, you know, pushed as like fan fiction. Yeah. Um because I think they really do they really do stand on their own. Like you don't have to know anything about anything other than what's explained in the book, to be honest. Yeah. Fully enjoy it.

Ashley:

Alchemiz did that too. I felt, you know, you didn't have to know where it came from for it to be a solid story.

Mari:

Yeah.

Ashley:

Um, I'm glad that it's receiving well.

Mari:

Yeah, agreed. Does anybody else have any other news tidbits?

Jonathan:

Um, let's see. I did see that there's a new fourth wing jersey rolling out.

Ashley:

Uh jersey?

Jonathan:

Yeah, yeah. Fourth wing jersey for the Colorado Rockies.

Ashley:

Um, she dropped a whole bunch of dates though, didn't she?

Jonathan:

Yeah, but I think it was for like other sports. So, like the Colorado Rockies thing is is new, like five hours ago, kind of. Oh, okay.

Ashley:

And because it's not a single sport anymore. She was doing tennis and like basketball and hockey. It started with no, I thought it started with baseball. I think it is the Red Sox one.

Jonathan:

Yeah, it's probably it was probably yeah, it's they did probably did start with the Red Sox one.

Ashley:

But hockey meant something to her because her kids play.

Jonathan:

Correct. Correct. Yeah, so it's just interesting. It looked like hot. Like it when I say hot, I mean like temperature-wise, like a lot of times those jerseys are, you know, they're the materials aren't the most breathable.

Mari:

Polyester. So it's like a plastic shield.

Jonathan:

And then, you know, it's like it looks like something Zaydan might wear, right? So it's all like shadow daddied out, you know? Or like I shouldn't say Zaden. I it looks like something that a rider would wear.

Ashley:

Dragon rider approved.

Mari:

Okay. Anything else in the news tidbits?

Jonathan:

That's all I have, I think.

Ashley:

Yeah, I haven't seen a whole bunch.

Jonathan:

Did Rebecca start writing writing her new book yet?

Ashley:

Allegedly.

Jonathan:

Allegedly. That's about right.

Mari:

She says she'd been sitting down right. Yeah, I thought she had said that, that she was feeling good about it, wasn't having like the panic attacks anymore, getting onto the keyboard, so she was writing it. So good for her.

Jonathan:

Wasn't there, didn't did I hear that Sarah J. Moss was was starting book six?

Mari:

I don't know what kind of created the story of those rumors.

Jonathan:

Yeah.

Ashley:

The lore is deep.

Mari:

Yeah, like I'll believe it when there's an official announcement.

Ashley:

I was gonna say allegedly book six is done. Right. And we're just waiting for announcements. But we'll see.

Mari:

There's plenty of books to read in the meantime, though. My TVR is thick. Um, all right. So, why we chose this book? Because it's Black History Month, and we wanted to read a book by a black author, and also, I do believe this is our first like sci-fi book we've read for the podcast. Science fiction, sci-fi romance, whatever that we've read for the podcast. So it was published February 18th, 2025, so just about a year ago. And this is the synopsis, and then we'll get into our thoughts on it. Dorothy Valentine is close to getting her PhD in wildlife biology when she's attacked by a lion. On the bright side, she's saved. On the not so bright side, it's because they're abducted by aliens. In her scramble to escape, Dory and the lion command commandeer and escape pod and crash land on an alien planet that has dinosaurs? Dory and her new lion bastie, Toto, are saved in the nick of time by a mysterious and sexy alien, Sol. On their new adventure, they team up with the equally hot, equally dangerous Locke, who may or may not be a war criminal. Whether it be trauma, fate, or intrigue, Dory can't resist the attraction that's developing in their trio. As this ragtag group of misfits explore their new planet, Dory learns more about how and why they've all ended up together, battles more prehistoric creatures than she ever imagined, she imagined zero, and questions if she even wants to go back home to Earth in this hilarious and steamy alien romance adventure comedy romp.

Ashley:

It was all of those things. Listen, I started this book and I I don't remember how many pages in I was, and I was like, this, this is this is accelerating quickly. This, like, how are we here already? But there's still so much left. I was like, where did where's the good part? I was I was like scratching my head. I was like, why am I not enjoying this more? And then it smacked me upside my face. Like there was a point where I was literally like kicking my feet and bursting out loud laughing. Um, and I know that that's how it ended as well. And so this book was wildly hilarious to me. I I loved most of the minutes, like literally 90% of the minutes that I read this book, I loved everything about it.

Mari:

Jonathan, what do you think?

Jonathan:

Um, you know, it's if you were like, if if you were like, what are you doing today, Jonathan? And I was like, oh, I'm going chorin and like doing the laundry and like vacuuming and stuff like that. This is the book I would read. It was it was entertaining. I think like so it's a whole bunch of chaos like mixed into. And you lose sight of kind of what's going on in the chaos. And then like, so you get into this like chaotic thing, and then all of a sudden you're like, oh yeah, there's a knot involved in this chase evasion scene.

Mari:

So like I'm trying to-the least of the absurd things that are happening here.

Jonathan:

Yeah. So how how are they even running? Are they like, are the three of them like it's like a like who's from the piggyback? Well, well, well, well, we know who's on the piggy front. And then who's in there? And then where did the tails come from? It was just like, what is happening where the tail well from the behind?

Ashley:

That's what they're yeah.

Jonathan:

So then there was like, so I like I'm like, okay, this is and then like I'm trying to like picture this. Like, okay, what is happening? Where are we? Where is she? Where's he? Where's other he? Who is he? What is he doing? Why is the lion here? I don't know. And then I kept getting like donkey from Shrek vibes out of the lion. It was like, oh, it was like she was like, oh yeah, she's in love with me. And then she's like, get away from me.

Ashley:

Wait, is that what the audiobook sounded like?

Jonathan:

Uh it was the audiobook. I I'm not gonna lie, the voice actress who is the female lead, it's a it's a an entice, she has an enticingly sounding voice.

Ashley:

That's not who I was asking about.

Jonathan:

I know. That's who I was talking about. The the men just are like feel basic in the books, but the the the female voice actor stands out.

Ashley:

That was intentional marketing.

Jonathan:

Maybe, maybe. But it was like she's I think every time you think that in this story, like she's gonna lose control of the situation. She's like, dude, she just writes in a way for this for the main character to just be like, nope, I'm in charge here. Oh, you got me here to get pregnant? Cool. Oh, nope, this implant's still here. I'm good. Yeah. Let's let's commence the fucking. Yeah, I like it. What did they say? What was the whole thing about like chocolate? Didn't they were like, in order to get like she could have named anything at some she could have been like chocolate and coffee?

Ashley:

She wanted chocolate and coffee.

Jonathan:

Best way to get me pregnant is to get me this, these, this list of items. You didn't know that about Earth?

Ashley:

I mean, the the other list of comforts existed somewhere on the dumbass planet. There were baths, there were houses.

Jonathan:

Oh, yeah. With the houses thing. Did they didn't that it was like cul-de-sac? Did they have more than one? Did they have calls to sack?

Mari:

Yeah, they had multiples. Like what they said they had cul-de-sac, what, every 30 miles? Cold de sacks.

Jonathan:

Not cold to sack, Ashley. It's called sac.

Ashley:

I don't know. I know, but I looked it up, and both are allowed. I'm I was gonna send you the screenshot of the typo, but it wasn't the typo.

Jonathan:

Does it say call de sacks in the book?

Ashley:

It does.

Jonathan:

Ooh, it's a French word. And I think that the French don't pluralize. We can't pluralize they because that's accepted in the written calls.

Ashley:

I knew he was gonna geek out over this.

Jonathan:

Yeah.

Ashley:

What did what did the penguin sound like?

Jonathan:

Nah, it's just meh.

Ashley:

Nothing. He wasn't unique at all. That makes me sad. Listen, when Toto was like, that was so yesterday. We're different people now.

Jonathan:

How can how can I watch Sass? How can I watch hidden figures the same way ever again?

Ashley:

This whole thing was the most wild ride, and I had the best time. For me, too, it was like how she would dork out over all the animals that shouldn't be there. What are you doing here?

Mari:

I love that the thing that broke her brain was the giant toad.

Ashley:

Giant toad. She just jumps off of the stupid dinosaur. Some words I thought I'd never say. What are you doing here? I lost it. Because that's such a real reaction, right? To somebody who is, you know, deep enough into their knowledge base about a certain topic. You're not supposed to be here. How are you surviving?

Mari:

It was the the straw that broke the camel's back.

Ashley:

Like, yeah. Dinosaurs fine.

Mari:

Aliens fine.

Ashley:

No, no, not even dinosaurs. We're talking pink ass fluffy tea dresses. Are you shitting me right now? Unfazed. No problem.

Mari:

Kelly, what did you think?

Kelly:

It wasn't for me.

Mari:

Did you laugh?

Kelly:

Some of the parts were funny. It wasn't for me.

Ashley:

I feel like that would be Kelly. What are you doing here? You're not supposed to be here. How are you this big?

Jonathan:

What are you eating? No way. I feel it. I feel like Kelly's like calls the sack, not call de sacks. Are you looking it up? Yeah, I think we're gonna win this battle with calls de sack.

Ashley:

Are you gonna tell Kimberly Lemming she got it wrong?

Jonathan:

If we meet her, I'm gonna be like the plural for sacred.

Mari:

So what I'm hearing is that the cul-de-sac is your giant toad. Yeah, yeah. The dinosaurs altogether isn't bothering you. The aliens aren't bothering you. The talking bird intern people aren't bothering you.

Jonathan:

What does bother me is how did you get captured by a fucking owl?

Ashley:

Because she died. She was on the cusp of dying.

Jonathan:

Oh, yeah, that's right. She was on the cusp of dying.

Ashley:

Yeah.

Jonathan:

That's right. I I you know this the what I think like there's some like poetic license that goes into these things, and you have like to read these books, you gotta let go of some of that. Like there's nothing has to be explained. Right. So the idea that the communication lines are changed the moment you lick somebody, the tongue touches their face. Like the line was like, you can hear me, I can hear you. All of a sudden we're both speaking English. And what happened? Well, it must be, and then they put two and two together real quick. They're like, they didn't even like try some things, they weren't even like, stick your finger in this one. No, oh, let me lick your face. That did it, right? No, it's just like it must have been from that time your tongue touched my face. Hmm.

Ashley:

The real love story.

Jonathan:

That's right. Yeah. So it's just it's it's interesting there. And then the idea that the owls I do, I I did like that the owls were like, This is you're a very expensive project. We spent so much time and energy on you.

Ashley:

Three whole days of research.

Jonathan:

Three days of research.

Ashley:

Listen, the parallels to that administration compared to what we're seeing lately was on point. I don't know how Kimberly Lemming knew, but she just she crushed it. Yeah. Crushed it, just knocked it right out the park. I was so entertained. And then like the ending. Codename Cupid, are you shitting me? Lost. I literally my head flipped back and I cackled. It was like it was exquisite. That was just, they wrapped that up real nice. If I didn't read another book, I would be pleased. I'm going to, because I'm a sucker.

Jonathan:

What about you, Mari? What'd you think?

Mari:

So this is my second time reading because I'd already read it, but it was last year when it came out that I read it. So I reread it for this. It's not my favorite Kimberly Lemming book. I will say that. I and but that's because to paraphrase one of Kelly's things, it wasn't for me. Um, I am not the biggest fan of polyamory um books. Like I tend to like to focus on like two people. And when you get into more than that in a relationship, you have to work real hard to keep my interest. So I focused on the other parts that I did like. I like Toto a lot. I he was sassy. Yeah, Toto was probably my favorite. Toto's little thing with like the saber-tooth tiger, tigress, whatever, I thought was perfect. I would have loved to have read more about that. What did he call her?

Ashley:

His goddess? I think so. He called her something ex like what way out, like his obsession with her was top tier. Yeah. Yeah.

Mari:

I I thought that was really well done. On this reread, there's a lot of parts of it that reminded me of, and Kelly, you're gonna know this. I don't know that anybody else in the world will know this. Um there's a movie that my brother and I watched all the time growing up. Do you know what it is, Kelly? Oh, okay. So you're Hunter from the Future. I don't think anyone else has heard of it. It is No, I haven't heard of that at all. It's it's a like a low-budget 1980s Italian, French, Turkish, sci-fi fantasy film. All those words. There's like barbarians and like tribes and like dinosaurs, and then it gets into like time travel and future stuff. Just covering all the bases, all the things mishmashed together in an absurd way. Whatever genre that is, that's what this is. It felt like it was very much the same genre. There were things that had me laughing, things that I did enjoy, like Saul's reaction when she took her shoes off, and he was like, You have Hoof Rot! Hoofrat that had me laughing.

Jonathan:

The fact that she did a callback on Hoof Rot later on in the book when they were like, You don't you don't want this? Look at my feet, hoof rot.

Mari:

Well, because what what weapon did she have to fight with? She wasn't stronger than them, she didn't have fire she could shoot out of a tail, but like her biggest weapon was her brain. She was a scientist, she's smart and used to thinking, you know, on the fly. So she's like, Oh, I remember Hoof Rot. Hoofrat really like, you know, stopped him. So she brought it back out. This whole thing was just the most wild ride. Yeah. I'm so dead. The thing that I think is the most I mean, you know, not that you're doing deep thoughts about this book. It's it's it's meant for like just fun, easy consumption, but like if the little owl people had not shot them up with the love serum or whatever, would any of this have happened? Yeah, maybe in which case is this like a roofie situation, you know what I mean? Like, do they have any of them have any agency in this whatsoever?

Jonathan:

It's inter it's interesting to look at it in that perspective.

Ashley:

But um Well, I mean, I think arguably, as I am not an owl scientist, and I don't remember all the stupid words that dumb little owl penguin said. But I think at some point he was like, There's no guarantee that the serum will work. Like the female re when they were in like the enemy territory and the the other war leader guy whose name I will never remember, but he wanted the owl to shoot the other female, right, with the serum because he wanted a mate. And he was basically like, There's no guarantee, right, that this will get you the response or the reaction that you wanted. Like Mr. Owl scientist was delighted that it worked so well with the first three.

Jonathan:

And their research was in was in like three days. So maybe it didn't, maybe that's just like okay, this didn't really work, and these people really just are like happy to fuck. But hold on, are they owls? They're owls, right? They're like bird aliens.

Ashley:

I don't know that they're owls.

Jonathan:

I just I don't know why I decided they were owls.

Ashley:

I think I decided they were penguins, but I don't have any proof.

Jonathan:

Didn't they fly?

Mari:

Maybe. I think they like hovered. I don't think they could actually fly away on their own wings.

Jonathan:

How much how much hovering do penguins do, actually?

Mari:

All of it.

Jonathan:

Just checking. Those are walking birds, aren't they?

Mari:

Penguins are flightless birds.

Jonathan:

Yeah. So I'm I'm picturing these aliens being like chickens.

Mari:

You know how chickens can kind of like do a quick little hover kind of thing?

Jonathan:

That's interesting. We're gonna need some clarification. You know what? Are they on the cover of the book? Hold on.

Ashley:

The owl was not. The bird dude was not.

Mari:

No, I think they hover like chickens, but I think if they look like the bird creatures from Star Wars, in my mind.

Jonathan:

Oh porgs. Yes. Yeah, that tracks.

Ashley:

They're penguin-shaped. Fuck right off.

Jonathan:

They're like if penguins and owls fucked.

Ashley:

It's like a fuzzy penguin. It's a fluffy penguin. It's a it's a penguins are fluffy, they might hover.

Jonathan:

It's a porg. It's a do you think they would hover if they were fluffy and not so slick with the fish?

Ashley:

Yeah.

Jonathan:

Okay.

Ashley:

That's my scientific opinion.

Jonathan:

You can opine all you wish.

Ashley:

Oh no, I don't need to. I've decided.

Jonathan:

As uh as a man, I'm gonna concede.

Mari:

As one does.

Jonathan:

Mm-hmm.

Mari:

What'd you guys think of the uh steamboat Willie Church?

Jonathan:

Well, I was again, it was just another thing that they were like, all the research done. Yep. Were they a sponsor?

Ashley:

Oh, we don't know that they were a sponsor.

Mari:

No, they they I think it was like copyright or something. Remember they said there was something about copyright infrastructure.

Jonathan:

That's what it was. They were like, yeah, we copyright infringement. They were like, hold on, you shoot us up, make us fuck, but you're worried about copyright infringement. It didn't make sense, it doesn't fit. There's not like intergalactic copyright law that's that's respected, right?

Mari:

I mean, who knows?

Jonathan:

Yeah, I mean dinosaurs now, right?

Ashley:

Yeah. Fluffy pink ones. Don't ever get over that.

Jonathan:

Yeah, it's it's just one of those things where like let the let the let the acid take you where it needs to go. Just write it down along the way. Let the acid take you where it you too can have a book. Yeah, it's a this is an entertainment piece for like a rainy day. I I feel like the person who would maybe enjoy this is gonna be like, I don't know what to do with my day today. I have a bunch of free time. I'm looking for something to lift my spirits and be a fun read. This will do it. This'll do it.

Mari:

Yeah. Yeah, it's it's like it's it's an easy, fun, like absurd, spicy. Absurd to say absurd again. Vibe kind of read. Um I mean, I'll be reading I I say all this, but uh, I'll be reading the next one. Like when the next one comes out this year, I'll be reading it. It was it's gonna be I think it's gonna be Blair and that evil warlord dude. I I think that's their their story is the next one, I believe. As they're shooting at each other, yeah.

Jonathan:

Fucking dead. That's a that's the kind of that's a good relationship vibe, right? It's like I hate you. Wait, where are you going?

Ashley:

I wonder if he's gonna be the sunshine in that grumpy sunshine book. Oh, that would be amazing. She's the she's the grumpy one. Yeah, because she like took notes. Arguably, yeah. She was like, I'm done with this, this isn't gonna work out for me. And he's he's like, Yes, this is Yeah, yeah.

Mari:

So we'll see. We'll see where this where this goes. I'll I'll read I'll read the next one for sure.

Ashley:

Because we need to find out about Agent Coop Cupid. Yeah, motherfucker. Yep. Talk about falling into a promotion, right?

Mari:

Um at one point I wrote down a note if like this whole alien culture trying to recreate like a human habitat thing, especially with like the way the the billboards were, if you like the billboard logos, all this, if it's supposed to be like a commentary on AI, on generative AI, how it doesn't get things right. You know, it's like, oh, six fingers on one hand, that's fine. It's good, good enough.

Jonathan:

You eat with a fork, I eat with a fifth.

Mari:

Yeah, yeah.

Jonathan:

Yeah. Um, you know, and I I I honestly I got a little bit of the what was it, uh the Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3 out of this jam where they had like built a world, they were trying to build this utopia that turned out to just be like like chaotic shit. Um they just couldn't get it right. Like, so that's so I could see like where that's headed, but like for me it was like I feel like I I could put myself into that world, like that Guardians Volume 3 world. Interesting. What is it called? New Earth, Second Earth, something like that.

Mari:

It's been a while. It's been a minute since I watched that. I don't remember, honestly. But yeah, this was you know, it was it was fun the first time I read it, it was fun the second time I read it. I completely forgot that I completely forgot there were dinosaurs in it and like a pink turnosaurus rex. So when it happened again when I read it the second time, I'm like, oh yeah, that's right. There's all this weird stuff in it, too.

Jonathan:

Oh, we desensitized my nephew with Jurassic World. He was like the most he's two in the most violent dinosaur. He's in the dinosaurs, the most violent dinosaur scenes pop up on the screen, and when the Tyrannosaurus Rex like murders something, he just with excitement, he goes, Oh, tyrannosaurus rex, rrrrr. And I was just like, Yeah, that kid's just he's gonna say, Yeah, we we just ruined him.

Ashley:

Even if they were fluffy and pink, side quest.

Jonathan:

It may have been like what did dinosaurs look like? We don't know.

Mari:

Yeah. Oh, and when I think was it like Saul's character was interacting with Locke, and he was like, You you trained the dinosaur? Oh, you you yeah, you like domesticized or traced the dinosaurs, the one that he was riding, Blossom and all that. Like Locke's reaction, I was like, I saw Elwoods from Legally Blonde. Like, what? Like it's hard?

Jonathan:

Yeah. What do they call him? Like a kip herder or something like that.

Mari:

I don't remember the name. It was it was Blossom was the name of the the his particular mount. It's a duckbilled dinosaur. Yeah. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

Jonathan:

Is it maybe it is a yip herder or something like that?

Mari:

I thought it was a yik.

Jonathan:

Yik.

Mari:

I think it is yik, because that was like an animal they had on their homeworld or whatever.

Ashley:

Yeah. That animal wasn't foreign to lock and soul.

Mari:

Oh, and the whole like Soul's people and Locke's people on their planet, like in this forever war with each other, where they've even forgotten what it was about. I'm like, yeah, that's a war commentary right there. What are we even fighting about?

Jonathan:

More money.

Mari:

Yeah. Yeah. So, unless we have anything else to say, we have our final question. Ash.

Ashley:

Um, here's the thing, because I feel like I touched on this earlier. Little Mr. Owlman said that there was no guarantee that the serum was going to work. And that if it did, that it was just intensifying feelings and hormones that already existed. For that reason, it's a kissing book. Because she thought through this. She's a smart one, right? She's about to get her masters. She thought through this, and at any point she could have been like, nah, fuck you guys. I'm out. And no, she actively put herself in danger two separate times for these two separate dudes. And I feel like they each did the same for her. So this is a kissing book for me. Although on the very thinnest of lines.

Jonathan:

I'm gonna go, no, not a kissing book, but I'm gonna say it's a fucking book. Like, and like beyond like so it kicks it into like it is like if hey, if you're out if you're looking for if you're looking for what what was the word you said earlier? Absurd.

Mari:

Absurdist to me it's like absurdist humor, yeah. And I don't mean that as a criticism, I mean that as a a type of comedy that is also essential to give living through these times.

Jonathan:

Yeah. Like like how you would say, like an awesome event, an absurd level of humor, and then and that or an absurd absurdist humor slash outright smut with contemporary tone. Yeah, that's yeah, that's yeah, not a kissing book in l but like dirty, kind of dirty looking book there. I'm in.

Mari:

I was gonna I wasn't sure what I was gonna say as far as kissing. I was like borderline question mark, but I I do agree with Kelly, like Toto and his saber-tooth lady were were having their own fun times regardless of the serum. So I'm gonna say yes for the same reason. Yes for them. Fair enough.

Jonathan:

Who who would we recommend this book to? What kind of reader are we recommending this book to?

Mari:

I'd recommend it to someone who wants a something like um what's that book? Like Hitchhiker's Guide, or like what's another absurd sci-fi book?

Jonathan:

Spaceballs? Oh wait, that's not a book.

Mari:

I mean, but still that kind of a story where it's like it's a sci-fi story, but it's like slapstick. Slapstick and comedy, but but with you want you want those stories, but you want to add some spice into it, this is what you get. It's like that kind of absurd slap slap, you know, slapstick humor almost, but with spice, I'd say it's those kind of vibes. Also, if you just like dinosaurs in your stories and you don't mind spice, you know, you're gonna get a dinosaur story.

Jonathan:

Yeah, yeah.

Mari:

Yeah. Okay, so unless we have anything else to say, I'm gonna wrap it up. All right, so thanks for listening to Of Swords and Soulmates. Before we go, make sure to check out the show notes, rate, review, and subscribe to us on your podcast app of choice. It helps others to find us. Follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Of Swords and Soulmates, check us out on our website of swordsandsoulmates.com. If you'd like to offer a suggestion for a future episode, book, or discussion topic, feel free to reach out to us on the DMs of any of these options. If you want to read along with us as we prep for a new episode and get chapter-by-chapter interaction, join our Fable app Book Club by searching for the Of Swords and Soulmates book club on there. And last but not least, we hope you'll join us in two weeks for our next episode when we will be discussing the forks forced proximity trope. We're gonna have a trope episode. And if you want to get a jump start on reading the episode after that, we're gonna be reading Crown of War and Shadow by J.R. Ward.

Jonathan:

Bye guys.

Head Shot

Mari

Host
Head Shot

Ashley

Co-host
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Jonathan

Co-host
Head Shot

Kelly

Co-host

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