The Grace Period: Shining A Light on Lawyer Wellbeing
The Grace Period: Shining A Light on Lawyer Wellbeing
Episode 17: Getting Help
Ever feel like the walls are closing in on you at work? Discover how you can take control of your mental health and wellbeing in the high-pressure world of law. I'm Emily Logan Stedman, and on this episode of The Grace Period, we're having honest conversations about the importance of seeking professional and personal help to maintain your sanity.
Learn how mentorship, supportive colleague relationships, and effective delegation can transform your workflow, prevent burnout, and keep you thriving in your demanding career. I'll share practical tips for identifying which tasks can be handed off and strategies for building trust and communication within your teams.
We'll discuss why setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and asking for help from family and friends are non-negotiable for your wellbeing. Whether you're knee-deep in big law or another rigorous profession, these insights are designed to help you prioritize yourself without compromising your professional success.
Stay tuned as we also highlight the benefits of establishing a network of supportive peers, asking for help from friends and family, and even seeking therapy or counseling.
Don't miss next week's focus on time management as a form of self-care. Remember, taking care of yourself and supporting one another is key to enduring and excelling in this field.
Find out more at https://thegraceperiod.substack.com/.
Welcome to the Grace Period where we get real about attorney mental health and well-being and pull back the veil on the high-stakes world of big law. I'm your host, emily Logan Steadman. In this demanding profession, it is crucial that we don't lose ourselves in the hustle for billable hours. On the Grace Period, we have honest conversations about finding consistency, minimizing chaos, developing coping strategies and destigmatizing mental health. It is time to prioritize our shared humanity, to find our grace period. So far this season on the grace period, we've defined well-being and talked about why it matters for the law. I shared my story, defined mindfulness, encouraged y'all to give meditation, journaling and gratitude a try. Last week, I shared about how to build a greater sense of autonomy by choosing to do at least one thing each day that is just for you, no matter how small. Today, we'll talk about asking for and getting help on multiple fronts in our personal lives, in our professional lives and for our mental health and well-being.
Speaker 1:Most of us enter this profession as young adults. Almost immediately, if not already. The reality of adulthood sinks in. At the same time, life starts moving at 100 miles per hour. Personal and professional things start vying for our time, and this increases exponentially year over year. Add to it that we work in a service profession. We give of ourselves to solve our clients' problems, no matter the type of client or whether we're in public or private law. That is draining. It is exhausting. To give of yourself to serve others, no matter how rewarding or fulfilling it feels when we're doing it. On top of that, most of us are high achievers. So all of this is a recipe for burnout, overwhelm, stress and self-soothing of all varieties. We cannot do any of this alone. We cannot survive this mix of things alone, but that's often what we resort to. I definitely did this. I still do it, even though I'm self-aware about it. I convince myself I'm the only one overwhelmed, I'm the only one burning out. That's just not true. It is a lie our brains tell ourselves. So today I'm here to encourage you to ask for help. At work. This looks like finding colleagues you can trust for mentorship, to ask all your questions and to vent in a safe and trustworthy environment. I'm also a big proponent of having friends at other firms, other attorneys who are about your same vintage, who you can move through your career with. On the other hand, at work, this also looks like delegating.
Speaker 1:Delegating is scary for a lot of people. It requires us to give up some control and we often hesitate, not just because it gives up control, but because it requires more work up front. I encourage you to embrace and then move on from both of these mindsets when delegating. The first question to ask yourself is does this have to be done by me? If the answer is no, find the appropriate person to do it.
Speaker 1:Identifying tasks that can be delegated is the first step Legal research, document review, scheduling, administrative duties. Then you must work with the person you're delegating to. You must clearly communicate expectations, deadlines and priorities. This requires proper training and communication up front. It does take extra time and resources to ensure that tasks are completed correctly and that your team is moving forward, but that upfront investment creates space and time down the line. It also helps you build relationships and trusted workflows that you can continue to delegate to all Over time.
Speaker 1:More and more we must trust those to whom we delegate and resist the urge to micromanage. That's a time waster for everyone. Regular check-ins and feedback loops help maintain quality of control while also fostering accountability and open communication. Ultimately, delegating tasks frees up our time to focus on high-value work, improving productivity and our work life. I encourage you to Google the Eisenhower like President Eisenhower matrix. It is a tool to help you decide when and whether to delegate. It pushes you to question or ask whether tasks are important or not important, urgent or not urgent, and based on which category the task falls into. You do the task or you schedule yourself to do it later, or you delegate it, or if it's not important and not urgent, maybe you just delete it. I also want you to think about delegating.
Speaker 1:As part of our ethical obligations, we're required to provide competent and diligent representation to clients. No lawyer can do everything themselves. Seeking help through delegation assistance paralegals, associates, colleagues ensures comprehensive and accurate legal advice. But what about at home? How do we get help at home, where we also cannot do it all? At least we cannot do it all very well. Look around. Who can you ask for help? A spouse, a parent, a grandparent, a friend, a neighbor? Don't be shy.
Speaker 1:For me, this looked like asking my husband to be in charge of all dinners. He knows what I like. He enjoys cooking. It often pushed me over the edge at the end of every day to be asked what do I want for dinner. So he took that on In another version. He and I got serious about our housework. He's in charge of things outside and I'm in charge of things inside.
Speaker 1:But look, I get it. I live by myself for nine years and I know what it is like to feel like you have to do everything. It is hard, so don't undersell all that you're doing. If you're in that phase of life, if you're in that phase of life and if you can afford it, outsource your help. Getting a house cleaning service lifted a huge burden for me no-transcript. That's true for me when it comes to organizing, but not regularly deep cleaning or tidying up my home or, you know, vacuuming dog hair. So every two weeks someone comes in and helps us with this. I also use a dry cleaning, pickup and delivery service. Others use grocery delivery services. Grocery delivery services Ask yourself what do I need help with, identify who can help and go out and get it. You deserve it. You do not have to do everything yourself. Finally, for yourself and your mind, I encourage you to consider therapy and counseling mind. I encourage you to consider therapy and counseling, virtual or in-person, solo, couples or group.
Speaker 1:I found a therapist within six months of joining Big Law. I've seen him at least once a month and often twice a month, since 2016. He has helped me through both professional and personal highs and lows. The neutral setting, the neutral third party, the venting, the processing. It helps me immensely. In fact, on the day I'm recording this, I had my standing appointment with my therapist and I had to work through some kind of heavy things that have been weighing on me the last two weeks. I'm not kidding or exaggerating when I say I left that session feeling better prepared to focus on work and get through my day.
Speaker 1:A lot of people are skeptical of therapy. There's generational differences here, but I encourage you to embrace and recognize that mindset if you have it, to embrace and recognize that mindset if you have it, and then try to move on from it. Humans are meant to connect. It is a shared human experience to get help and be supported by another person. Being an attorney does not insulate us from this need, and many insurance programs provide free therapy sessions through employee assistance programs or EAPs. Having a therapist or counselor helps with stress management, mental health, emotional intelligence, career development and more. A therapist can help you with both personal and professional struggles and they can help you figure out if you need to make a change. They can help you process hardships and trauma. Therapy is confidential and nonjudgmental. It provides a safe place for you to just let it all out. It is not a weakness to need help. It is a strength to admit that you need help and an even greater strength to go out and get it. The more lawyers seek help and talk about it with others, the more we will reduce the stigma around getting help in our profession. I encourage you to start small here and to lead by example.
Speaker 1:Thank you for joining me on this episode of the Grace Period. I hope this discussion has provided some insights about the importance of getting help in the office, in the home and for our mental health and well-being. Next week we'll revisit time management as self-care. Remember you don't have to sacrifice your well-being for career success. By prioritizing self-care, setting boundaries and seeking support, you can survive and even thrive in the law and in big law. Until next time, take care of yourselves and each other. That is the path to our grace period. Care of yourselves and each other that is the path to our grace period. Disclaimer this podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It does not constitute professional advice of any kind, including legal advice. No attorney-client relationship is created by listening to this podcast. If you made it all the way to the end of this recording and heard the cuckoo clock, I'd love for you to reach out and let me know. Thanks,
