Episode 56: Owning Your Seat At The Table (Revisiting Imposter Syndrome)

Sharp suits, sharper minds, and that gnawing thought: “They’ll figure me out.” We’re pulling back the curtain on imposter syndrome in Big Law and talking honestly about why smart, accomplished lawyers still feel like they’re faking it. Emily shares the story of leading a trial team for the first time—the curveballs, the comparisons to heavyweight opposing counsel, and the surprising truth that the work was better than the fear suggested.

We break down the mechanics of self-doubt in high-pressure environments: perfectionism, relentless comparison, and a culture that rewards certainty even when the facts are still forming. Instead of treating imposter feelings as a verdict, we frame them as a growth signal. You’ll hear practical tools to steady your footing: a two-column evidence audit to challenge shaky thoughts, a simple prep framework to replace anxiety with action, and a micro-reflection loop that captures wins before your brain discounts them. We also get real about the importance of a trusted circle—mentors, peers, and friends who reflect back the truth when your perspective narrows.

This conversation is about belonging you can prove to yourself. We talk self-compassion as a performance skill, how boundaries protect focus and well-being, and why curiosity is the cleanest fuel for advancement. If you’ve ever stared at a new matter, a promotion, or a courtroom and wondered whether you’re ready, this is your reminder: the feeling is normal, the evidence is strong, and you’re capable of more than your doubt admits.

If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a colleague who needs the nudge, and leave a quick review telling us one win you’re finally claiming. Your story might be the proof someone else needs today.

Find out more at https://www.linkedin.com/in/emilystedman/.

Transcript

Welcome And Purpose

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Welcome to the Grace Period, where we get real about attorney mental health and well-being and pull back the veil on the high-stakes world of big law. I'm your host, Emily Logan Steadman, a commercial litigator, partner, and someone who believes there's always room for a little more grace, even in a high-stakes profession. On the grace period, I share real stories from my journey in big law and invite you behind the scenes, past the billable hour, and to talk about what it means to stay human in a demanding field. If you're a lawyer, a legal professional, or someone trying to find your footing in a high-achieving profession, this space is for you. Let's pull back the curtain, start the conversation, and find our grace period together. Disclaimer, the views and opinions shared on this podcast are mine alone and do not necessarily reflect those of my firm or any organization. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It is not legal advice, and listening does not create an attorney-client relationship. Welcome to episode 56 of the Grace Period. Today I want to look back on a topic we've discussed before. One that is a persistent topic in our profession and a nag in my personal life. So I think it is worth revisiting. What is that? Imposter syndrome. Odds are you've felt, quote unquote, imposter syndrome, that sneaky voice that says, I don't really belong here. Or sooner or later they'll figure out I'm faking it. Or I'm not ready. They're gonna find out. Or I should be doing XYZ because that's what partners, associates, big law attorneys do, or what other similarly situated humans do. Imposter syndrome is persistent self-doubt, even in the face of evidence that you're doing fine, or even excelling. And if you pause and check that evidence, there's probably a lot of it. In law, this can show up when you land a new case, get promoted, or take on something you've never done before. Suddenly you're question if you're really qualified or if you just got lucky and whether everyone else is more prepared or, you know, has it all together. Why is this so common in our profession? Well, the law attracts high achievers, perfectionists, and people who are used to getting things right. And often most things have come easy to us. We're surrounded by smart and accomplished colleagues and smart and very accomplished opposing counsel, and it's easy to assume that everyone else has it all figured out and you're the only one who doesn't. Spoiler alert, that's just not true. Imposter syndrome feels like self-doubt. It feels like a fear of being found out. It includes discounting your own accomplishments. Last year I led a trial team for the first time, a dream scenario. It came with loads of curveballs, lots of very new opportunities, and often I was convinced that someone would expose me as an amateur. The reality, now that I've had some time to look back on it, I did just fine. I even nailed a lot of it. But the feeling of doubt was real, especially compared to my super, super big law opposing councils. So, how do you reframe imposter syndrome? First, recognize it as growth. You're on the edge of your comfort zone. You're taking something on that's just outside what you're used to. And that's where learning happens. You can't get better and progress in your career if you're not taking on these challenges. Second, normalize it. Even the most senior attorneys feel this way at times. You're not alone. Third, challenge the narrative. Look at the evidence, your wins, your progress, the trust others put in you. Review your resume if you have to. See that you belong here and have worked hard to get here. Finally, use it as fuel. Let imposter syndrome drive your curiosity. Show that it is an example of your willingness to learn and your openness to try new things and meet new people. Here's some other practical steps. When self-doubt creeps in, and if you're like me, it always will, legitimately pause and ask yourself: what is the evidence of this thought? What's the evidence that this is true or false? Likely the evidence is that you're ready and you're ready to take on more. Next, talk about it. Don't keep this bottled up inside of you. Share your feelings with a peer, a mentor, a trusted confidant. Then practice self-compassion. Remember, you belong here even when you feel uncertain. Talk to yourself like you probably talk to your friends and colleagues with pride, grace, and compassion. If you're nodding along, know this imposter syndrome is a normal response to growth, to trying new things and getting outside your comfort zone. It is not a sign that you're a fraud, a failure, or that you don't belong. You are here because you tried. You're here because you're ready for what's next. Thank you for joining me on this episode of the Grace Period. Remember, you do not have to choose between your well-being and your ambition. By setting boundaries, building supportive habits, and giving yourself permission to pause, you can thrive in the law and in life. Until next time, take care of yourselves and each other. That is the path to our grace period. Disclaimer the views expressed here are solely my own and do not represent the official policy or position of my firm or any organization. This podcast is for informational or entertainment purposes only, not professional or legal advice. It does not create an attorney client relationship.