51. How to transform your mind, body and soul in Midlife: Radical Transformation after 40 for Christian women

"Who is that woman holding my baby?" 

This jarring moment of non-recognition became the catalyst for Maureen Brintnell's remarkable transformation journey. After years of putting everyone else first, this homeschooling mother of eight found herself staring at a Disney vacation photo, unable to recognize the exhausted stranger cradling her child.

In this powerful conversation, Maureen (now known as "The Alpha Momma") shares how this wake-up call led her to reclaim her health and deepen her faith during perimenopause. She walks us through the often-unspoken challenges of this 7-10 year transition that can begin as early as our mid-30s, causing symptoms far beyond hot flashes – from anxiety and fatigue to pelvic floor dysfunction and heart palpitations.

What makes Maureen's approach unique is her unwavering commitment to Catholic values. When conventional medicine offered only solutions incompatible with her faith, she forged her own path, developing strength training routines, nutrition frameworks, and stress management techniques that honor both body and soul. Her gym wall bears witness to this integration: "It would be a shame to work so hard to be fit for this world and be unfit for the kingdom."

Beyond physical transformations, Maureen guides women to reframe midlife as a preparation for continued purpose. She teaches practical strategies for engaging family support, measuring success beyond the scale, and discerning God's calling for the next chapter of life. Whether you're approaching perimenopause, navigating its challenges, or supporting someone who is, this episode offers concrete tools rooted in faith to help Catholic women thrive through every season.

Connect with Maureen at https://www.alphamomma.ca or on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/@alphamommafit to learn more about her programs, including Catholic Midlife, designed specifically for women navigating these changes with faith as their foundation.

Chapters

• 0:00 The Inspiration for Transformation in Mind, Body and Soul: Maureen's Story of Faith, Healing and Transformation in Midlife
• 2:35 Introduction to the Alpha Momma and her quest to help other Catholic midlife women
• 9:03 Maureen's Personal Transformation Journey
• 16:30 The Physical Solutions for Midlife
• 27:30 Beyond the Scale: Markers of Success
• 36:00 Creating Family Support Systems
• 47:15 Faith as the Foundation of Transformation
• 56:15 Starting Your Fitness Journey Today
• 1:01:15 Episode Closing

Transcript

Maureen Brintnell: 0:00

And I'm looking at these pictures and I'm normally not in the pictures, right, like a lot of moms, I'm staying out of the photos. I'm taking the photos in that, but I'm not in the photos. And I happen to be in this one and I was looking at it and there was this strange woman holding my baby and it took me a second, but my first thought I looked at it and I said, "Who is that woman holding my baby? Because it had been so long since I'd looked at myself and I did not recognize this person who was in this photo anymore.

Sheila Nonato: 0:39

Hello and welcome to the Veil and Armour podcast. This is your host, Sheila Nonato. I'm a stay-at-home mom and a freelance Catholic journalist, Seeking the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the inspiration of Our Lady. I strive to tell stories that inspire, illuminate and enrich the lives of Catholic women, to help them in living out our vocation of raising the next generation of leaders and saints.

Co-host: 1:02

Please join us every week on the Veil and Armour podcast, where stories come alive through a journalist's lens and mother's heart.

Sheila Nonato: 1:10

Do you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? You are not your own. You were bought with a price, so glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6, Verse 19. Are you in your 30s or 40s feeling more exhausted, running after kids and running the household, or do you want to level up your fitness to serve the Lord and be fit for the kingdom? If you're a Catholic mom seeking answers about decreased energy, unexplained mood changes and other perimenopause symptoms, look no further than Maureen Brintnell. Maureen, aka the Alpha Momma, is a homeschooling mom of eight who has just welcomed her second granddaughter. She embarked upon a radical transformation of body, heart and soul. Not only did she adopt a healthier lifestyle, she also developed a deeper relationship with Christ.

Sheila Nonato: 2:21

Let's hear her remarkable story and how she is helping other Catholic moms find restoration and transformation rooted in their faith while navigating the challenging season of midlife. Thank you for joining us again this week. God bless you and your families.

Sheila Nonato: 2:41

Welcome to the Veil and Armour podcast ,and I am honored to have Maureen Brintnell. Am I saying that correct, Maureen?

Maureen Brintnell: 2:48

Yes.

Sheila Nonato: 2:49

Ok. She is the Alpha Momma and she is a formidable advocate for women's health in midlife, and she is a Christian homeschooling mom, Maureen, welcome, and can we start off with a prayer please?

Maureen Brintnell: 3:00

Absolutely In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. Hail Mary, Full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Sheila Nonato: 3:23

In the name of the Holy Spirit, amen. Well, thank you very much, Maureen, for joining us. We are experiencing a heat wave right now where we are in Ontario, but we are keeping cool. You are in Northwest Toronto? I'm very bad at geography.

Maureen Brintnell: 3:43

That's okay.

Maureen Brintnell: 3:44

I'm actually in Woodstock, woodstock yes, yeah, about an hour outside of um okay, okay.

Sheila Nonato: 3:51

And how are you keeping cool right now, are you? Do you have the AC on? And lots of lots of water.

Maureen Brintnell: 3:59

Yes, but we're actually keeping with um our littles over the weekend and it was quite hot. Wow, but home and back in the AC now.

Sheila Nonato: 4:08

Okay, awesome.

Sheila Nonato: 4:10

And congratulations on your new granddaughter. Is that correct? That is awesome,

Maureen Brintnell: 4:16

Yes, it's my second grandchild.

Maureen Brintnell: 4:17

I have a third one on the way, so just keeping this Nana era that I'm moving into right now.

Sheila Nonato: 4:24

And I can't believe you're a grandmother already, but I would love to hear, we would love to hear your story of transformation. Tell us what was going on with you before you started your business. It's more like an apostolate. Really right, Fit for the kingdom. I would say.

Maureen Brintnell: 4:41

Absolutely.

Maureen Brintnell: 4:43

I actually have a sign in my gym that my son made for me and it says: "t would be a shame to work so hard to be fit for this world and be unfit for the king.

Sheila Nonato: 4:54

Oh, wow, I love that

Maureen Brintnell: 4:55

And so that's in the wall in my gym so everybody knows when they come in that this is what we're going for here. Um, so a little bit of my story. I'll tell you that I am not one of those gym girls who can tell you that, oh, I was always athletic, or I loved gym. I used to make up stories to get out of gym class, like as a career. I was very successful at it. I avoided physical activity. I had a lot of physical problems. I had arthritis, I have scoliosis, so there's a number of issues that kind of held me back from being physically active. But then I, you know, I'm married and we have eight children and they range in age, our youngest, who is 10, to our oldest, who just turned 30. And in that time of busyness and, of course, like we homeschool as well, we just finished up our 25th year of homeschooling and just, it was never a decision, it was just kind of, as you know, it kind of happens as as wives and mothers, and we're pouring into other people and we're taking care of all of the people around us who need us. And that really became my identity. That was who I was. I was this mom of this large brood and just taking care of them and not really recognizing that the fact that I wasn't taking care of myself was very slowly taking a toll on me, not just physically but mentally and emotionally as well.

Maureen Brintnell: 6:35

And what had happened, one year we had taken our children down to Florida to go to Disney and we were looking at pictures afterwards. And I'm looking at these pictures and I'm normally not in the pictures, right, like a lot of moms, I'm staying out of the photos. I'm taking the photos in that, but I'm not in the photos. And I happened to be in this one and I was looking at it and there was this strange woman holding my baby and it took me a second. But my first thought I looked at it and I said, "ho's that woman holding my baby? And it took me a second. But my first thought I looked at it and I said who is that woman holding my baby? Because it had been so long since I'd looked at myself and I did not recognize this person who was in this photo anymore. And, yeah, absolutely Physically I didn't recognize her. She was very heavy, she was out of shape, she was tired, but she didn't really know much about who she was, outside of this role of being a wife and a mother, which I absolutely love.

Maureen Brintnell: 7:37

But it did kind of wake me up because my kids were getting a little bit older, bit older, and so I was kind of moving slowly out of the constancy of, you know, diapers, you know what it's like when you've got little ones in the house, and as they're getting a little bit older, it kind of opens my eyes to, okay, so what's next? You know, like, as these kids continue to grow and fly the nest and develop their own lives and their own families, you know what's kind of next for me? So that was going on At the same time. I'm in my 40s and what I didn't recognize at the time was that I had started into perimenopause. So I was experiencing a lot of symptoms and of course, like a lot of us, I'd gone into the season without knowledge or preparation. Like you know, when we think about our young girls, when their cycles are starting, there's usually some routine or some tradition or some ritual around it, you know, like taking the girls out for lunch or shopping and kind of explaining the changes and what's happening and what they may be feeling. Nobody took me out for lunch for perimenopause and I did not know what was going on.

Maureen Brintnell: 8:54

So that was all kind of happening at the same time and I began just by getting up early in the morning and taking a walk. I didn't know what to do, but I knew I needed to change and start taking walks in the morning and it kind of just grew from there as I was listening to podcasts and I was doing more research and trying to figure out what was going on with me and all of these changes kind of became very clear as to what was happening and then started developing a plan as to you know what, what to do about it? Right, it's one thing to correct and not okay, here's the problem. And then say, okay, now what, what am I going to do about? It is the problem. And then say, okay, now what, what am I going to do about it?

Maureen Brintnell: 9:46

And so that started this, this fitness and this wellness journey that I um, that I got on and, sorry, my phone keeps going off, I can turn it on, and I think for a while I really did still kind of struggle with a little bit of isolation, a little bit of shame over some of the symptoms, and I certainly wasn't sharing it with a lot of other people.

Maureen Brintnell: 10:11

And then one day a woman came up to me after a soccer game and she pulled me kind of in the parking lot behind the cars and she just she was so emotional and she said how do you, how did you do it? And then she started explaining her life and started explaining a lot of the struggles that she was having, which were very close to mine, and I thought, oh my, like I'm not the only person here. And so that's what kind of started the business end of it in terms of reaching out to other women, other Christian women, other Catholic women, specifically about you know what's going on with us, kind of in our late 30s, 40s, into our 50s? What does this mean for us as we move into this next season, and how are we called to respond to it?

Sheila Nonato: 11:02

Yes, absolutely, and in terms of I guess you were mentioning perimenopause, so that is a period before menopause, that's in your mid, in your 40s. Is it mid 40s or it can start early well, it can start earlier.

Maureen Brintnell: 11:16

So I'll just explain the terms very quickly. So we have perimenopause, and so perimenopause is usually about seven to 10 years. So for some women that can actually be starting in their mid thirties. So you could be experiencing some of these signs and symptoms of you know this change happening long before you're even thinking because, yeah, we do kind of think of our forties and 50s. So you've got this seven to 10 year period of a lot of hormone fluctuation.

Maureen Brintnell: 11:50

As you know, your estrogen, your progesterone and other things are ultimately declining and leaving the body, but they don't do it without a lot of like up and down and fluctuation first, which can create havoc for a lot of women, and that time can show up in ways that we wouldn't normally tie to our cycle unless we know about it. So what a lot of women talk about in this time is increased anxiety, low mood, lethargy, just like their get up and go is gone. But then there's other physical symptoms. They can start experiencing heart palpitations, digestive issues, pelvic floor dysfunction, so they can start experiencing some urinary incontinence. There's all of these things that are going on where a woman might think that, well, this doesn't have anything to do with my cycle because it seems to be so removed, but it actually is part of this process.

Maureen Brintnell: 12:47

And then menopause is actually just one day, and that is the day that you it's been one year since your last cycle, so when you have gone without a period for 12 months, that is your date of menopause. Every day after you are in menopause or post-menopausal. So we have like the 7 to 10 years before where a lot of women are going to experience those perimenopause symptoms and then they move into post-menopause and then they move into post-menopause and in post-menopause a lot of those perimenopause symptoms do start to subside, they do start to go away. But what women are left with if they have not heeded the call of perimenopause and it's very much a wake-up call if they've not heeded that call what they find waiting for them in menopause is an increased risk of osteoporosis, a higher risk of cardiovascular disease, a higher risk of depression, pelvic floor dysfunction, muscle loss.

Maureen Brintnell: 14:01

I have ladies who come to see me in their 60s and their 70s and their goal is not aesthetic. Their goal is they want to be able to genuflect at mass without pain. They want to be able to do up their own seatbelt again, and this is the sort of thing that waits for women who don't, like I said, don't pay attention to what their body is trying to tell them in their 40s.

Sheila Nonato: 14:31

And so you were mentioning some of the symptoms, so I consulted.

Sheila Nonato: 14:33

Doctor Google, although people should go to a real doctor, but according to the Mayo Clinic.

Sheila Nonato: 14:35

So some of the symptoms that can be confirmed by a doctor irregular periods, hot flashes, sleep problems, mood changes, bladder problems, as you mentioned, decreasing fertility, loss of bone, changing cholesterol and other other symptoms that your doctor will definitely be able to identify for you. For you, yes, but in terms of I guess you were mentioning that woman in the parking lot and then you know the feelings of shame. I guess that's sort of tied to, because when we get married and then you know there of shame, um, I guess that's sort of tied to because when we, you know we get married, and then you know, and there's always like, when are you gonna have children, when are you gonna give us a grandchildren? You know there's always this, this kind of expectation. And now so, when we're going into this new phase, new stage in life, when, um, we might are we are we going through a grieving process for our fertility, is that where the shame comes from? Can you explain a little bit? What are we feeling at this stage?

Maureen Brintnell: 15:32

The shame comes from a lot of different places. There is definitely, for a lot of women, a sense of grief and loss, especially if so much of their identity has become wrapped up in being a mother and having babies. So then the question is you know, as my fertility is wrapping up, where do I fit in? Like, what is my purpose? And what I say to women all the time is you're still here, so you are still part of the church. Militant, you do have purpose, you do have mission. There is a, so you are still part of the church, militant, you do have purpose, you do have mission. There is a reason that you are still here. There's a reason why humans are one of the few species where the women live beyond menopause, and so there is still something that we have to offer, and, of course, we have to figure out for ourselves what that is and what that looks like. But there's a lot of other things ourselves what that is and what that looks like, but there's a lot of other things. The one big one is, you know, just say it, but the urinary incontinence that a lot of women experience. It gets sold as well. You know, you did have babies and you are a woman and it's sold as this suffering that you are just supposed to accept and tolerate, and it's not. And there's, there are. There are things you can do, there are, there are people that can help with that, but there is, that there's.

Maureen Brintnell: 16:58

There's shame. I've spoken with women in here who who fear going to the gym because they know they're going to wet themselves if they, you know, exert themselves too hard. They don't want to chase after their kids in the yard because they don't want to wet themselves. I mean, it's just heartbreaking to me that there is a mom who wants to play tag with her kids but is afraid she's going to pee Absolutely breaks my heart. But so that the shame comes from that. The shame comes from women who look at their bodies and don't recognize them anymore. And it's not like you know. We look at our postpartum bodies and we can be so grateful for the life that it has given, the life that it has protected and nurtured. And so when we look at our bodies and I've had women, beautiful women refuse to do their exercises in front of the mirror because they don't even want to look at themselves, and then so there's a lot of shame about that.

Maureen Brintnell: 18:05

Am I vain. Am I, you know? Am I? Am I obsessed with the aesthetic when I shouldn't be? I'm supposed to be better than that.

Maureen Brintnell: 18:13

So it can come from that place. It can come from when we're going through all of these changes, especially hormonally. We can find that we, we can be a little sharper with our loved ones and, you know, maybe we're snapping at the kids or maybe we're snapping at our husbands, and so we're feeling a lot of guilt about that. So it can come from a lot of different places. It can come from, like, that decreased libido that a lot of women experience and nobody wants to talk about, and so all of this stuff, and you know, and we're left, kind of women experience and nobody wants to talk about, and so all of this stuff, and yeah, and we're left kind of sitting here and what are we supposed to do with all of this?

Maureen Brintnell: 18:54

And so part of why I started this is because when I was going through a lot of this and I would go to my doctor and I would hear, well, you need to get an IUD or you need to go on the low-dose birth control pill, and I would say, well, I'm not going to do that. And the response to me was well, come back when you're ready for the IUD. So I was really kind of left on my own when I was dealing with issues of stress management, which is another big thing that a lot of women experience in perimenopause and I was told well, you need to do yoga. And I'm like well, I'm not going to do yoga.

Maureen Brintnell: 19:36

And so I felt very there was an increasing isolation, because not only was all of these things going on that I didn't understand, but whenever I reached out for help, I was told well, there's help available to you, but you have to compromise your faith to access it.

Maureen Brintnell: 19:52

And I'm not going to do that. So I really had to sit back and spend a lot of time and just like, okay, lord, I know that you have an answer, like I know you do. So you just you know you're just going to have to let me know, because I'm not going to do all of these other things and I don't believe that you've called us to suffer like this for, you know, the next 40 or 50 years. And so it was a lot of reading through the studies and learning a lot of stuff and a lot of trial and error, but finally kind of putting together something that I feel has managed my perimenopause very well and now, you know, helping a lot of other women. And I can say now, like I'll be 53 this year and I'm I feel like I'm in much, and all my my markers from the doctor will confirm this but I'm in much better health now at 53 than I was, you know, at 43. So we can, we can flip the trajectory too, which is kind of exciting.

Sheila Nonato: 20:58

That's an amazing story and, if you don't mind, I saw I think it was on Facebook or Instagram you had a picture before and after and it's remarkable the change that you went through. If you wouldn't mind, yeah, I would put that on the video, if you wouldn't mind, Absolutely.

Sheila Nonato: 21:15

Just to see how, yeah, transformation can happen, because I guess at this stage losing weight can be problematic because of sort of the hormone changes, fluctuations and again this kind of I don't know. I guess it's like a mindset block that you know I don't see any progress, so I'm giving up. You know it used to be yeah, in my 20s I would be. You know I would run every day. It's not the best exercise for you, but that was my thing is like I would run every day and metabolism's high, you know, and so I could eat whatever I wanted. Not the greatest advice, but yeah.

Sheila Nonato: 21:59

So it's not like the weight would stay, but now's, you know it's staying and you're wondering how do I get it, get it off or how do just? It's not even about like the number right on the scale, it's really about how you feel and not having so much fatigue. So, in terms of like solutions so let's talk about physical solutions, like in your program, what, what do you? I mean you don't have to give away all your secrets, but like I don't know, I don't know anything behind the program, I will be the one to mute. But what would you recommend for women in terms of like physical solutions, like, what can they do?

Maureen Brintnell: 22:37

There's, and the good news is that, for us, less can be more. Us, less can be more, and so what I mean by that is we're kind of past the phase where we should be doing, you know, boot camps and things like that. You know, six days a week, that's not going to work for us anymore. So I'm going to tell you like everything, but I don't want people hearing this to get overwhelmed. I'm not saying we implement this all at once. Obviously, we want to do it and I'm always very careful. We want to do it in a way that honors our vocation. So I don't want to do things and advise women to do things that are going to feel unnatural or uncomfortable to them because it takes away too much time from their you know the other things that they're called to be doing. That said, what I like to see women doing is strength training is a non-negotiable for everybody. 70-year-old clients in the gym here deadlifting, it's a non-negotiable. Two to three times a week. You need to be really working those muscles hard. We want to take a look at our nutrition and it's again, it's very simple the more whole foods we we make, the more foods we can eat in the form in which they were created, without all of the addeds and things like that is going to be better because, like you said, like our digestion changes as we get into this phase, so we want to make sure that we're eating a lot more whole foods, that anti-inflammatory nutrition. We don't want to be cutting out entire macronutrient categories Women need carbs but we want to make sure that we're getting good whole grain, high fiber. You know carbs in that sense. So we want to be strength training, we want to be eating, we want to really be very focused on getting good sleep and I know this is when most people just laugh because they're like I have not had a good night's sleep in 20 years but we really want to develop a runway almost before your bedtime to allow you know your body to start shutting down so that you can get, for women, seven to nine hours of good quality sleep a night is what you should be getting and on average, women need about an hour more than men do. So you just kind of need to factor that in that if you're going to bed with your husband and you're getting up with your husband and he's well rested, you could probably use another hour if you're still just kind of need to factor that in, that if you're going to bed with your husband and you're getting up with your husband and he's well rested, you could probably use another hour if you're still feeling kind of tired. So that's something to be aware of too.

Maureen Brintnell: 25:27

And you want to be just getting your walks in. You want it and walking is such an underrated exercise so you want to be getting out and getting those walks in, and there's always like lots of other want to be getting out and getting those walks in and there's always like lots of other things to be doing. You want to make sure you're drinking your water, and that's for the kind of the physical end of it. But then when we talk about stress management, this is when we can really lean in into our faith and you know we don't have to go outside to hot yoga studios or things like that. That spending that time, you know, in prayer and spending that time, you know, with the Lord. They found that if you spend 15 to 20 minutes a day doing something to bring your stress level down is the most effective kind of block of time, and I always find it very interesting that that's about the same length of time it takes to do you know your daily rosary.

Maureen Brintnell: 26:27

Now I wouldn't recommend the family rosary as your time to de-stress, because I don't know what family rosary time is like at your house, but maybe not the most low stress situation for a woman. But if she can find another 15 minutes somewhere, even on her walk, to really connect with the Lord, that's going to bring that stress level down just to where she can start to manage it again. So those are the things I would say right off the top. So those are the things I would say right off the top. But, that said, what I don't want women doing is getting online and downloading an hour workout and downloading a nutrition plan and trying to implement that all of a sudden into the craziness of her life. We want to find that one area.

Maureen Brintnell: 27:15

Okay, what's the one change that you think you can make today? Like, maybe it's in the nutrition? Maybe you can focus on getting more protein, because that's the other thing I will say about nutrition. Most women are not getting enough protein. So when you say how much protein should I be getting, you should be getting a gram per pound of body weight a day. So if you are sitting at 150 pounds, 150 grams of protein a day is what you should be getting, and when you start getting that, just watch how much better you feel.

Sheila Nonato: 27:57

And so that's interesting. Just to go back to what you said, you said we need carbs. I guess we can eat. Can we eat bread? Not really, you can eat bread.

Maureen Brintnell: 28:10

You want again our digestion kind of changes. So I don't know if it's every individual, but I find I don't digest bread very well.

Maureen Brintnell: 28:20

It sits like a rock right, so I eat more like brown rice. I eat my sweet potatoes, so I do get my carbs. I get a lot of veggies. I'm eating salads at every meal, so we're not like carbs are not the enemy. Women actually do much better with carbs. Not like carbs are not the enemy. Women actually do much better with carbs. But yeah, we, you know eating a lot of bread and cereal, because then we're moving into the processed.

Sheila Nonato: 28:47

Yeah, right, right, right, okay

Maureen Brintnell: 28:48

So it's not the carbs so as it's the the processing of the foods we do want to move away from as much as we can.

Sheila Nonato: 28:55

Okay, um, and how do you feel about

Sheila Nonato: 28:58

I used to do sourdough. I did this whole sourdough thing trying to figure out what is all the fuss about. I only could do it for, like, I think, a month or two, because it's really like a family pet. You have to feed it every day. It has its own life force. But I mean, is that healthy Sourdough or bread that you make yourself?

Maureen Brintnell: 29:20

It's certainly healthier.

Maureen Brintnell: 29:21

Absolutely yeah, and again, it's going to come down to very, very individual, as how do you feel after you've eaten it? Okay, yeah, and you know, do you feel bloated, do you feel heavy, do you feel tired? Well then, maybe you're going to want to look at. You know something else. I think always making it at home is going to be better. That's just my personal bias. Obviously, if you can do that, that's going to be better. But when we look at like you were talking about, you know, weight loss, and I just want to go back to that very quickly, because what we're going to talk about is those other markers for success. So, yes, when you are on this journey to wellness, yeah, you know, the scale might be a part of it but I also want you tracking, like you've said, how, like, how's your food digesting? What's? How do you feeling after you eat? Your energy levels, how's your sleep, how's your mood, mood like, how are all of these other things which are going to maybe show up for you before the scale does, and if we can kind of recognize those and say you know what? The scale hasn't dropped yet. But I can now make it up this flight of stairs without having to stop and catch my breath. That's a huge win for our quality of life and I really love to move women away from the scale as that sole metric Because, like I mentioned in those symptoms, one of the things that's happening as we're moving into menopause is we are losing muscle mass, we are losing bone density, so we're strictly focused on weight loss.

Maureen Brintnell: 31:05

You could also be losing muscle. You can be losing bone. You can be losing water. What I want you focused on is fat loss. I want to focus on improving the muscle to fat ratio on your body. And when we think about, like, a pound of fat and a pound of muscle, they weigh the same. They're both a pound, but a pound of muscle is a lot more condensed, it takes up a lot less space. So a woman who is strength training, who is managing her nutrition, who is managing her stress and her sleep, might not see a big drop on the scale, but is going to see a huge difference in how she feels, how she looks, how her clothes fit, her energy, all of these other things, and when that happens, the scale doesn't quite matter so much. Right, because you're getting all of these other things that are, like I said, are improving your quality of life right?

Sheila Nonato: 32:06

Yeah, I guess I never thought of it that way, about um muscle and fat weighing the same. So yeah, the scale doesn't really tell the full story. It does not tell the full story it does not tell the full story and I really wanted to go back to. You know. You're talking about sort of the de-stressing, getting more sleep, so it's sort of contributing to again a solution in terms of the emotional, you know, and yeah, I guess, emotional stress that could come from.

Sheila Nonato: 32:35

You know, this kind of change, season of change, sort of a new, I guess we're developing into a new woman again, A different, yeah, exactly, and I love how it's a new woman in Christ that you're rooting it, you know, in faith, because you know that's sort of the glue or the anchor that's going to help us to keep persevering right, To sort of not lose hope. And, as you were saying, it's not just about numbers or what you think you should look like, because you're already the daughter of the King of Kings, so you don't need to prove yourself. You're already beautiful because you're created in his image and likeness, but you just have to believe that. And in terms of, I guess, in your program how do you incorporate sort of the faith aspect? And how do the women do they form sort of like a community supporting each other in prayer and in encouragement, I guess Can you tell us a little bit more about your program? You know what is it called and how does it work?

Maureen Brintnell: 33:39

Well, I have a number of programs, but I'll tell you some of the commonalities in them is one of the things that I like to do with my women is we talk about developing a vision. So what I really want them to do is and we have a number of questions that kind of lead them through this but ultimately I want them to start looking ahead to you know, know their 50s, 60s, 70s and 80s and really start this process of discerning what am I called to do? Where are my interests Now that maybe the children are older and I have some more time? Is there a ministry that I've always wanted to get involved in? Is there a charity that I've always wanted to get involved in? Is there a charity that I've always wanted to do, or work that I've always been interested in but I haven't had the time? Or is there something I really feel like you know the Lord is calling me to do right now?

Maureen Brintnell: 34:30

And what happens is and I've spoken to dozens of women and I hear well, they shy away from it because they don't have the confidence, because they don't want people looking at them because they don't want to be the center of attention, and so I want them to kind of develop this vision. So this and of course you know, subject to change, because you know the Lord's plans may be different, and usually are Lord's plans may be different and usually are. But we can kind of look ahead and say you know, I really feel like I'm called to serve in this way. And then my question is are you going to be physically able to respond to that call? Are you going to mentally able to respond to that call, emotionally able to respond to that call? And if the answer is no, what are we going to do between now and then to make sure that when the time comes and the Lord says, okay, okay, sheila, this is your next job, and you're going to be able to say here I am Lord and not I'm sorry, I can't get out of bed, or things like that, right, so that's the first piece of it, because having that really clear vision you know they talk a lot in the fitness world about your why, and you know we can have a lot of different ones. You know, for me it really is about being able to be an active participant, especially now in my grandchildren's lives. Right, I want to be a part of that. But then it's also like this mission, like being able to walk with women as they go through this journey themselves, and really I call it like a reignition, like they reignite into these wonderful, incredible daughters, but now they have all of the wisdom of their lifetime behind them to bring into whatever they're called to do next. So that's a big piece of it.

Maureen Brintnell: 36:34

In my in-person we do do a lot of gatherings, we get together, we do some fun stuff, we do some support talks and then occasionally I run an online program. I call it a Catholic Midlife. So this one's like my in-person and my other online stuff Catholic perspective but obviously I'm open to, you know, anybody who wants the help. But the Catholic midlife, which I just absolutely love because it is just other Catholic women and they get their workouts to do on their own, we do one-on-one coaching calls a week so I can make sure that it's working for them. And then we do the group coaching calls and that's really where some just incredible connections are made and women start sharing and understanding that they're not alone in this struggle, they're not alone in their emotions and you know, I absolutely just love. I just love being able to sit and witness that happening.

Sheila Nonato: 37:44

Yes, that's beautiful. And do you still have that six-week program, or how long does the program run?

Maureen Brintnell: 37:53

So the Catholic Midlife is actually I think I changed it to 16 weeks in West Toronto. My other online program, which I call Ignite 50 50, that's based on the be who you were created to be and you will set the world on fire. So that's, that's a 12-week kind of online program. And then I just have my you know, my one-on-one. My local ladies can come in here and and do their workouts in person, which you know some them. That just works better for them, so I really try to keep it. So if a woman reaches out to me and she says this is what I'm capable of doing right now, then I want to be able to respond to that and meet her where she's at and then just kind of help as she walks forward in her own journey.

Sheila Nonato: 38:39

Okay, yes, absolutely. And so for women who, where they are right now, is, like you're saying, like lack of confidence in exercising because of a pelvic health issue, so I guess that's best addressed by seeing a doctor who could recommend physio, just so that she can feel more confident and be able to do perhaps what she used to do before having children and having the pelvic health issues. But are there other ways, aside from sort of the medical you know, physiotherapy aspect, that we can help to improve, like our pelvic health?

Maureen Brintnell: 39:24

Yeah, so part of the program, part of what all of my ladies do, is what we call this connection breath, and so I teach them to breathe in a way that reintegrates that entire core, so that's your diaphragm, your abdominals, your pelvic floor, your lower back and gets it all working together again.

Maureen Brintnell: 39:41

And then, once they've mastered that, we do bring in like pelvic contractions and lifts, and then you know that release and relax and then the contract and the lift. So we do work that muscle too. I mean there's no muscle left behind. We do work that one you know all of my ladies have. I will work with them with that. But you're right, if they're at a stage where they're feeling like a heaviness down there or a bulging, like there's a prolapse, then I would send them to a pelvic health physio to get an assessment done and then, based on the pelvic health physiotherapist's recommendations, she would either work separately with her or we would integrate the recommendations into our programming. Here Again, that just depends on the level of prolapse and what, like you say, what the expert, the pelvic health physio, recommends.

Sheila Nonato: 40:42

Okay, thank you for that. Yeah, I guess it's one of those things that you know nobody really talks about. That aspect of mother is like could you take care of your pelvic health? You know? Because, yeah, I guess it's good, now that I'm hearing more and more about it, that we can sort of have a community to support us and to not feel so embarrassed about it, that it's okay. It's actually meant I was seeing a physiotherapist and she said that men, especially during COVID, she had been seeing male patients who've had pelvic floor issues. So it's not just about birth and it's not. We shouldn't be ashamed about it, because you know there are also men who have it and you know they don't. You know, maybe perhaps they do feel embarrassed about it, but they shouldn't because it's really just one aspect of health that can be dealt with.

Maureen Brintnell: 41:38

There's something you can do about it. Yeah, exactly, that's the great thing. And, of course, for women, when we get into that pelvic floor dysfunction, you know we're also talking about an increased incidence of urinary tract infections and you know we're talking about a lot of dryness down there, which can make things uncomfortable, and then we start with the urinary incontinence. But it's that that pelvic floor is this muscle, and if we don't strengthen that muscle, then for a lot of women that weakness and that incontinence will travel back and it will become fecal incontinence. And so we want to make sure and this is really what the message that I really want to drive home to women is that none of this gets better on its own.

Maureen Brintnell: 42:27

Yes, there is an answer. Yes, there are things you can do, but you have to do them, because what we see in nursing homes and what we see in hospitals is women suffering, and women do tend to live longer than men, but they spend a longer time in poor health. That trajectory, that downward trajectory, starts kind of in their 40s. When we're tired, our joints start aching. Yeah, you said we've been dealing with urinary incontinence and low self-confidence, high anxiety, and so we don't feel like there's anything we can do, especially if you're like me and you've gone to the doctors and all of the advice they've given you is something that you cannot and don't want to partake in, then you kind of, aren't able to do anything about it.

Maureen Brintnell: 43:21

And then, all of a sudden, you're in your 50s and 60s and 70s. It hasn't gotten better. Now you're dealing with osteoporosis, you're dealing with osteoarthritis, and this is not okay. It's normal to have these feelings, it's normal to have these symptoms, but there is something that we can do about it so that we can continue to show up and serve the people that we love and do the things that we're called to do. I'm going to say, well, into our 80s and then, god willing, even into our 90s, let's go, let's just make a life of this.

Sheila Nonato: 43:59

Yes, and speaking of life, your truck. I love your truck because last week, after the Eucharistic Procession, uh, from Saint Anns parish, um, I was like I was, yeah, we were driving, I mean my husband was driving and I was like, " truck. It says less mid, more life, and it has your website, afamamaca. That's that's like amazing, I guess, advertisement, but it's really more also an encouragement for women. And when I heard you speak for the first time, I believe it was last year or two years ago, at a family catechism, yeah, in Stony Creek. You were there talking and really enlightening everybody, including the husbands. Yeah, that was great.

Maureen Brintnell: 44:47

Yeah, that was my favorite talk because that was the one where the husbands showed up and I thought honestly, kudos to your husbands, because I've never had a talk where the husbands have shown up before. And I remember it because the questions that they asked were so good questions that they asked were so good. And it brings home this other piece that we talk about in our program, where about four weeks in, I lay out the framework for a family meeting and we talked a little bit about that. But it's now that we understand what's going on and now that we understand a little bit better the changes and what we need, how can we now communicate that to our families? Because before maybe we didn't understand why we were feeling this way, we didn't understand what was going on, but now we have the vocabulary and we can talk about it. So let's have this family meeting.

Maureen Brintnell: 45:39

These are some of the changes that are going to be happening and it benefits everybody. Like you know, eating whole foods and anti-inflammatory nutrition the benefits aren't just reserved for perimenopausal women. That's going to benefit your children, it's going to benefit your husband's health. So how do we make this a family endeavor, so that mom can be strong and healthy. But your daughters are getting good messaging about their health, contrary to maybe some of the messaging that they're going to get from outside of the home. And you know your husband, like your husbands were, that day can become like more than just kind of cheerleaders, but they can become a really big, important piece of this whole journey. But they can become a really big, important piece of this whole journey, and so that's the other thing that we like to do is, I guess this is family meeting, which has been incredibly fruitful for a lot of women.

Sheila Nonato: 46:32

And yeah, I remember that day because the men were writing notes, okay, and my husband and I were exchanging notes.

Maureen Brintnell: 46:42

That's how impactful it was. We were passing once in class.

Sheila Nonato: 46:46

And I loved how your husband was so supportive of you. He was just so enthusiastic. He's more than a cheerleader, obviously, but he's like your greatest support, aside from God, obviously, and your family. But I was just wondering, also just going back to, as you were saying, the family meeting, consulting or speaking with the family, what is now the role of, you know, the husband, how do, how do?

Sheila Nonato: 47:12

And the children, how do they all help to make sort of, you know, to make sure that you succeed, you know, in whatever terms of success, you, you see success as um like, what kind of uh environment can they create in the home so that you all will, you know, be really fit for the kingdom? That you know, it's not about the numbers, right, but it's about, like, your health, your overall health and how you feel more energetic to fulfill your vocation in the family and to fulfill your vocation in the community and, yeah, and your role in the church. So how do they do that? How do they support the women so that we can do our job and we can also feel like ourselves again?

Maureen Brintnell: 48:03

And take care of yourself so you can take care of all the other people. Yeah, and so it really depends on like it's very individual for each woman and kind of where she needs maybe the support. For some women the support is really needed around her time in the evenings. By the time she gets into the kitchen at the end of the day, her mental load is like completely overwhelmed her and she's doing all of the things and then trying to manage the afterschool chaos and you know extracurriculars and all of these other things and dinner kind of ends up. Okay, let's just we're just going to hit the drive-thru, we're just going to grab a pizza. And so what I like to remind women of is that their children are capable, usually, of a lot more than they're being asked to do. So get these children a little more involved in the food prep. If you are a meal prepper, they can be there with you.

Maureen Brintnell: 49:02

They can be chopping the vegetables and putting things in the containers. And if they're teenagers, I have one lady she said it was an absolute life changer, but she assigned her teenagers each day of the week where they're responsible for making dinner. So they have to and they know the parameters, but they have to plan a meal. They have to make sure there's those ingredients and they have to, and they know the parameters. But they have to plan a meal, they have to make sure there's those ingredients and they have to have their recipe, and so it's bringing them into it, it's increasing their responsibility and they're learning really great skills, but it's also freeing mom up so that she can be doing all of the other things that she needs to be doing.

Maureen Brintnell: 49:41

Maybe this is when she's getting her walk in, and so it's really and this is like in that family meeting like there's a prep time where, before she kind of convenes this meeting, mom is really thinking about, like what do I need? Like maybe my struggle is getting out from my morning walks because you know, there's always something, there's always a child that needs me. So maybe it gets scheduled at this particular time and the older children know that for this half an hour or whatever length of time mom is allotted, that they're going to be watching the baby so that mom can get outside without guilt. We want mom to, because you know, as soon as you start guilting mom, she's going to put her shoes back down and she's going to come back in the house, and so part of the preliminary process before this meeting is mom's got to spend some time in, you know, in prayer and just in thinking about what, what do I need and what does my family need, and then we can sit down and we can say, okay, who can take responsibility for this? And you know who can, who could start managing that.

Maureen Brintnell: 50:54

And it takes a while, but if you can get everybody on the same team and you can get everybody to understand that this is not for mom, that this is going to benefit the entire family, and sometimes what happens, especially with some of the older kids, is what comes up in these meetings is that maybe they have their own health and wellness goals that they would like to work towards, and it's like, okay, let's see, let's see if we can incorporate that too to make sure that you are getting the time. You know, me and my daughter, we just did a mud run over the summer just a few weeks ago and like this is something that she really wanted to do. She's like I really want to do this mud run with you, and so she kind of was preparing for it and prepping for it and we had to make sure that we were kind of supporting her in that. So that's all that. All kind of comes up in the meeting, but very individual, to like the family and the circumstances, hello sweetie yes, absolutely well.

Sheila Nonato: 51:57

As you're saying, um moms, uh, there's always something that we have to do and we have to be able to adjust, be flexible. So if you know one week you're doing great in the exercise, the next week you might you know, things happen, kids are sick or whatever. You didn't have enough sleep so you might cut back on the exercise. But you know, just keep going right.

Maureen Brintnell: 52:24

We just you can still get your water in and you can still get your protein in. That's what I say to people. We don't you hear it all the time. You don't have a flat tire and then slash the other three right Like.

Maureen Brintnell: 52:36

It's not always going to be perfect all the time. Like I said, if you don't get a good night's sleep, you might not get that morning workout in and you might not push yourself as hard. But what can you control? Maybe you can control. You can still get out and get your walk in. You can still get your prayer time in. Maybe you can still make sure that you're eating, that you know that salad with that good lean protein for lunch, like one thing, does not have to completely derail you and a lot of women. We get stuck in this all or nothing, thinking that if I'm not doing it all perfectly, then I'm blowing it. And I've blown it again and I knew I was going to do this and it's like, no like. Let's show ourselves a little bit of grace and just focus on what we can control in the moment and just make another step forward.

Sheila Nonato: 53:27

And finally, Maureen, how did your faith help you to undergo this incredible transformation? I guess from your lack of confidence, but also the physical transformation and the spiritual transformation. What can you tell us about it? What did faith do for you?

Maureen Brintnell: 53:48

It was really and it was. It was interesting because when I started, I was really focused on. I just wanted to lose weight. I just it was the weight. It was the number. Weight, I just it was the weight, it was the number. I never imagined the number would get that high. And there it was, and I was really focused on that and so, as a result, I fell prey to a lot of scams, quick promises, you know, quick transformations this pill, the supplement, this herbal remedy and all of that was because I was looking for the quick fix. This pill, the supplement, this herbal remedy, and all of that was because I was looking for the quick fix, right, I just wanted to feel good again, and when none of that worked, and you know, the weight would not only come back, but it would come back and bring friends right Like it was. It was always worse when it was over, and so I was really left in this moment of okay like is this.

Maureen Brintnell: 54:44

It Like, is this how I'm called to feel for the rest of my life? And it was really in, you know, my walks and just having that time outside. Like you know, treadmills are great in a pinch, but if you can get outside and if you're blessed, like me, to be close to nature where you can kind of just walk and really, like I, would have my praise and worship music going in my headphones my neighbors think I'm crazy because I'm the woman walking down the street sometimes doing this, right, but really just talking to the Lord, and just what is it that you want from me? Like, why would you have created this, this dissatisfaction in me, if there wasn't, if you didn't also have an answer? And and really starting to kind of seek it out and, like you said, going back to recognizing, showing myself the grace that I would show another woman when I would say to another woman you are so beautiful and you are uniquely created and God is so in love with you, and to say that to another woman and then stand in front of the mirror and really work on saying it to myself.

Maureen Brintnell: 56:05

And then, as I kind of spent more time in prayer, I realized that wait a minute, my stress is coming down and I didn't need to do yoga to do it, I just needed to spend more time with the Lord and talking to him and he brought me the peace that I was looking for. And he brought me the piece that I was looking for. And then just recognizing that there was going to be hard work involved, that there was no quick fix Like everything else that's worth having, we're just going to have to work at it. And so getting into the gym and finally getting into the strength training and using that time in here and, you know, offering up I have one lady and when she's doing her planks she always offers it up for somebody. So when she's doing her planks and she'll say I'm offering this plank up for and then she'll name this person, and it was just a great perspective and brings kind of an added meaning to the workouts.

Sheila Nonato: 57:04

Beautiful and just to go back to the strength training. So I'm just wondering do we need a special like set of weights, like what if we can't really, I guess, carry too much weight? Since we're just starting out, what do you recommend for starting out?

Maureen Brintnell: 57:28

Well, I mean, you can give yourself a killer strength training workout using body weight, absolutely Really. But what I say to women all the time is I'm sorry I've seen you with two toddlers on your hips, carrying six grocery bags. Don't tell me you can't lift heavy, because I watch you do it all the time, right? So a lot of times what some women do is they just they pick up their little one and they'll start squatting and as their little one gets bigger and heavier, the weight that they're squatting is also getting heavier, right. So, and then there's lots of things we can do around the house. We don't need to run out and buy a whole bunch of equipment. You know there's. There's things even just like you know, if you're a homeschooler, loading up a bag grocery bag with some school books is going to give you some weights, right, and you're going to be able to use that, and so. So there's a lot of things that we can do kind of around the house.

Maureen Brintnell: 58:28

Like I said, even just getting a few squats in while you're brushing your teeth, like if you're, you're brushing your teeth anyways, and yeah, the kids are going to think you're crazy, but you know you can start by doing some push-ups off the wall, you can start doing some squats, you can do things like that. But we want it to be focused and progressive. So what I mean by that is we don't want to just be randomly grabbing exercises. You want to be able to have a program so you know you're working, you know all of your major muscle groups a couple of times a week. So you want to make sure you've got a plan that does that and you want to make sure that plan allows for you to increase the intensity as you are able to do it, because we want to be constantly challenging those muscles.

Maureen Brintnell: 59:20

So if you're doing three sets of 10 body weight squats and you're getting up at the end and you're like, yeah, I could do 10 more, then I'm going to tell you to add some weight to that, because what I want you at the end of that three sets of 10 is I want you to be out of breath, I want that heart going and I want you. Okay, that's it. I need to rest, I can't do anymore. So you want to make sure that that's a part of it. I need to rest, I can't do anymore, so you want to make sure that's a part of it. But for a lot of my ladies when they're starting out, I say two times a week, two times a week of that strength training, give yourself a day or two at least in between workouts so that we can gauge how you're feeling and how you are recovering and how much time your body needs, and then, very quickly, women will find that they're ready for that third workout.

Sheila Nonato: 1:00:07

Yes, absolutely. And yeah, when I, well before we got married, I hired a personal trainer to get in shape but and I was doing weights and stuff like that but I definitely appreciate the knowledge and the guidance, because you can lift weights the wrong way and that will not be good for you. So having a guided, professional sort of steer you in the right direction and show you the proper way to do it is really going to be very helpful. So I would recommend that. And how can women reach out to you, find out about your programs? Can you tell us where to find you?

Maureen Brintnell: 1:00:44

Absolutely.

Maureen Brintnell: 1:00:45

So yeah, my website, like you mentioned, it's on the back of my truck, so it's Alpha Momma, so Mama is M-O-M-M-A dot C-A. And then I'm also on Instagram quite a bit @alpha mommaf it so Alpha Momma F-I-T. So those are kind of the two easiest ways. The website will have a breakdown of the different programs, including the Catholic Midlife, if anybody wants to learn more about that. And then always just send me a message on Instagram and I'm always happy to give kind of advice or direction for a woman who's looking for it.

Sheila Nonato: 1:01:22

Okay, that's amazing. Well, thank you so much, Maureen. I really appreciate your time and your patience. As with in the middle of homeschooling, I was trying to sort of finish everything and then do the interviews so that my kids could have a fun summer instead of doing homeschooling during the summer. So I appreciate your patience and your time and your wisdom. Thank you so much, thank you. Thank you and have a blessed summer. Yes, yes, you too. God bless, thank you, bye-bye, bye, marie.

Sheila Nonato: 1:02:07

Thank you for listening to the Veil and Armour podcast.

Co-host: 1:02:10

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