How to teach the faith and form saints in the family: The Inspirational Story of Carissa Douglas, Mother of 15, Canadian author and illustrator

Merry Christmas Eve, Friends in Christ!

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This week, we continue our conversation with Carissa Douglas, homeschooling Mom of 15, author of The Little Douglings and Dougling Adventures series. Carissa also debuts her new baby board book!

The sound of a restless toddler in the pew isn’t a nuisance—it’s a sign of life. We sit down with Carissa Douglas, homeschooling mother of fifteen and creator of the Little Douglings books, to explore how a real prayer life grows in the middle of noise, laundry, and car seats, and why bringing kids to church is an act of hope that shapes souls for years!

Carissa opens up about building a daily rhythm that blends simple prayers with a constant, organic, authentic conversation with God. She shares how lighting candles, praying the Holy Rosary without pressure, and how Eucharistic Adoration with little ones turns doctrine into relationship. We dig into the surprising power of occasional daily Mass to train attention for Sundays, how to navigate discouraging looks with grace, and why praying for your priest changes the culture of a parish. Along the way, Carissa offers practical tips parents can use this week—everything from sippy-cup strategy to letting teens overhear your honest prayers when patience runs thin.

We also tackle homeschooling with nuance: initial fears, the role of community, and the fruit of a gentler schedule that still leads to academic success and real-world dialogue. Carissa explains how she adapts for different learners, including dyslexia, and why the home can foster virtue in a way schools often can’t. 

Then we face the smartphone question head-on. Hear why their family chose a phone-free, creative play path, and what kids gain—focus, resilience, deeper friendships—by delaying devices in a culture built on instant scrolls.

Threaded through everything is Mother Mary: a living model of dignity and tenderness who protects purity, calms fears, and teaches daughters to be set apart without apology. Carissa’s newest baby board book, "Mother Mary’s Heart," flows from childhood images of Mary’s care that still steady her today. Come for the ideas, stay for the courage to try one small change. If this conversation strengthens your home or gives you a fresh start, subscribe, share the show with a friend, and leave a review to help other families find this hope.

To find Carissa's books, you can visit https://amazon.ca and https://scepterpublishers.org and search for "Carissa Douglas" 

or visit https://littledouglings.com

In Canada: https://www.sunrisemarian.com Sunrise Marian Book Store in Waterloo, Ontario

https://primaryeducators.ca

Chapters

• 0:00 Motherhood As Vocation And Creative Work
• 2:10 Welcome And Episode Setup
• 3:36 Building A Real-World Prayer Life
• 10:45 Teaching Kids To Pray At Home
• 16:45 Bringing Children To Mass Without Fear
• 25:10 Homeschooling Discernment And Culture
• 35:20 Phones, Analog Childhood, And Boundaries
• 41:10 Mother Mary As Model And Protector
• 49:00 Raising Daughters In Dignity And Hope

Transcript

Carissa Douglas: 0:00

Clip #1: Yeah, it just, um, really like my greatest title is mom and that that's really, I guess, probably for all of us what our greatest title is. Um, the other apostolates or other ventures are all really have come and pour been pouring out of that motherhood. Like even the the children's books that I've been doing were um started when I was young and and felt that there was a bit of a void. There was a bit of, um, I had a need for something to feed my children spiritually and help with their formation, and and that's when we created the children's series, "The Little "Douglings," um, "I Go to Jesus," talking about trying to foster a relationship with Christ in the Eucharist and try to build up that friendship for them.

Carissa Douglas: 0:44

Clip #2: The sounds of children in a church mean that it that the church isn't dying, that the church will continue. It's actually sounds of hope. And there are many priests that I've I've met that are so good at really advocating for parents, like even in homily or or otherwise, like they just really try to thank families for coming. So I try, I try to connect with the priest for that. Um, I also find that it's so it almost seems contradictory. But my children, when we were able to bring them to a daily mass here and there, their behavior then on at Sunday would be better. And like I was surprised by that. I guess I'd be like my thought was that maybe they would get tired of it or they'd be more comfortable and so louder, but it seemed like they adapted that better. So I found if we could get even just one mass in during the week that somehow was training them a little more frequently of what you know how to be when you're in a church, how to act.

Sheila Nonato: 1:45

Sisters in Christ, as we prepare for the coming of Jesus this Christmas, you may be wondering if we should bring our children to church. Will they be too distracted or too distracting for other people? Rest assured, Jesus said in the Bible, let the little children come to me. You are welcome as a family to the Eucharistic banquet, especially on our Lord's birthday. Let's hear some words of encouragement from Carissa Douglas, a homeschooling mother of 15 with a baby on the way. She's also a Scepter Press children's book author and illustrator of the Christian-themed books, The Little Duggling series, Duggling Adventures, and a new baby book that Carissa is debuting on the show. Motherhood is hard, yet we can persevere.

Sheila Nonato: 2:35

What tips for motherhood can we learn from Carissa about marrying our marriage and our dreams with our family life? What tips does she have for teaching the faith to our children? And how can we look to Mother Mary as our model of motherhood and a feminine genius? God bless and may the peace of Christ reign in all our homes this Christmas and New Year.

Co-Host: 3:05

Hello and welcome to the Veil in Armour Podcast. This is your host, Sheila Nonato. I'm a stay-at-home mom and a freelance Catholic journalist. Seeking the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the inspiration of Our Lady, I strive to tell stories that inspire, illuminate, and enrich the lives of Catholic women to help them in living out our vocation of raising the next generation of leaders and saints. Please join us every week on the Veil in Armour Podcast, where stories come alive through a journalist's lens and mother's heart.

Sheila Nonato: 3:36

How do you how do you find time to pray? And then what how do you pray? Because a lot of people, including myself sometimes, like struggling. What do I say? Or even with my kids, I say, let's uh have a quiet time for 10 minutes. And you're like, I don't what am I supposed to do? And those 10 minutes would yeah, sit there and what do I do? So yeah, if you can invite um us into sort of your prayer routine, um, to sort of help us, uh, also develop uh a prayer routine of our own.

Carissa Douglas: 4:06

Right. So that that's changed over the years too. Like when I was when I had just one or two kids, I actually did try to attend at least one extra daily mass, like for a week. Um, and it's hard, but like I think the graces that came from it helped me in terms of her being more patient. And so that was very helpful. So the Mass itself. And now that we have older kids, I get out to daily mass quite frequently.

Carissa Douglas: 4:30

And and I have um my 13-year-old son uh feels called to the priesthood already, so it's great. So I'll bring him so that he can serve and you know spend that time closer to the altar. Um, so that that's changed, as I said, because I couldn't, it was more difficult when I had a ton of kids. It was very hard, just the idea of getting them all corralling them to do that. So the mass is obviously one prayer. But um, my my way of praying throughout the day is very much a continuous conversation. And so I'll be like doing laundry and I'll like drop the detergent on my toe and be like, oh, I'm like, "Oh Lord, I probably needed that, right? Okay, I'll offer for whatever you think I needed that for," you know, and I just have this kind of really casual, beautiful way of just bringing Christ into everything. And so much so that I'll sometimes walk in and hear my my teenagers kind of going, "Lord, can you believe this? Oh, you're gonna have to give me more patience." Like I can hear them speak and pray in the same way. That it's just, I think that's the continuous praying is like knowing that he's always there.

Carissa Douglas: 5:32

And so just engaging him or kind of every now and then commenting. And even when I'm starting to lose my patience and I'm like, okay, Lord, I need you right now. And I'll allow the kids to hear that prayer sometimes. And I mean, they might think that I'm like schizophrenic or just something at moments. But the truth is they they know that it's very real and it does have a a calming effect, and they can see that in action. So there's, you know, that's that's a way I just kind of kind of keep him present in my life as I'm serving them, and and it's a good example for them. But then also, um, again, being introverted, I I needed to find those quiet times.

Carissa Douglas: 6:09

And if I couldn't, there I would more so use this um, I guess, technique of going in my mind, like finding a place where I meet Christ. And and for me, um, I grew up in a house that had a huge like span of fields beside and a big forest in the back. And I remember sometimes when I'd, you know, need to talk to God, I would just like um go out to the field and sit on a hay bale and like, you know, start to kind of talk to him that way. And and he usually found ways of where just I would know he was there. Like all of a sudden I'd see a deer come up really close that would never do that before.

Carissa Douglas: 6:47

There's just these ways that he spoke to me. So in my mind, I like have a place for me. It's like it's almost like there's a forest behind me and a big, huge flat rock, and he sits there and I just go up and sit beside him. And sometimes I'll just lay my head on his lap and feel his hand on me, and I'll just look out to the field with him. So there's there's ways that I that I can enter that that place again, that you know, where I met him as a child. And um, and that's something that is real. Like it's I know I leave it. I talk to him there. Um, and I leave that place feeling refreshed and revived.

Carissa Douglas: 7:24

And I know that he's he's kind of met me there. So there there are ways to bring him in if you can't get out, or like if you can't find a way, or even if you can't find a break there, even just like sitting on the floor is like the toddlers, you know, mess around with stuff, like you can go there and and I do. And um I find it really has deepened my faith and given me a lot of graces that I know I didn't have before. I'm definitely a much better person now than I when I first entered this vocation. Like it really, I can see how it really has those lasting and powerful effects. So it's been good. And also, you know, before we were talking about the fear of having kids. And yeah, what I've really learned is is that I need these particular children that God's given me because they're so much um an example to me.

Carissa Douglas: 8:14

And sometimes they call me out on things, or sometimes they they God uses them to shape me and to, you know, call me to account, or even just I watch them and and I'm inspired by them. So it's there isn't a fear necessarily of of more children because I sometimes I'm like, no, like God's sending me exactly the person that not I'm not it's not just me giving to them. It's it's they're they're probably being sent because there's something I need to learn.

Sheila Nonato: 8:43

Beautiful. And um, so how old is your oldest again? Is it 22? 22, yeah. 22. Okay.

Carissa Douglas: 8:50

And the youngest is how old again? The youngest, two years old, and then two about five more months. We'll get to meet this one.

Sheila Nonato: 8:58

Wow.

Carissa Douglas: 8:58

Yeah.

Sheila Nonato: 8:59

And so your, you know, your series, your book series, it really revolves around your family and your faith life. How did you introduce prayer and I guess faith to them? And what did they how did they respond to, you know, yeah, all the prayers and the saints and all that stuff?

Carissa Douglas: 9:16

So again, I I definitely, you know, have that prayer life that, you know, that's very, very vocal sometimes. And so that that was adapted. We had um, but we have, you know, formulaic prayers that we established through the day just to kind of bring us all back together. So we have um they have their morning offering, they're just a quick prayer, you know, offering their day and their action to Christ and asking him to be with them. Um, we do an Angelus before we have lunch, and um we do um my husband and I started doing a daily rosary even when we were dating. And then that was um into our early marriage life. I found it very soothing. Like it was very hard to build up that habit.

Carissa Douglas: 9:56

But once I was there, I found it very, you know, wonderfully um therapeutic and, you know, just calming and relaxing. And I was able to enter into it. And we had started to try to bring the kids into that. Um we've we've learned to kind of just understand the limitations that kids have at, you know, the short attention span. So we really just we didn't want them to feel like it was ever a burden or something that, you know, they had to do like a tour.

Carissa Douglas: 10:21

So it was whenever we'd be praying it, we wouldn't require them to be like, you know, really still or anything. We would just we would light candles, we would kind of make it a nice atmosphere. And then we started actually for a little while, we're like, you know, it can get stressful, like because you know, it's like don't touch the candles, you know, don't eat the rosary, you know, those kind of things. So we continued it ourselves, but I think it was just it's kids pick up on what you're doing. So that's why, like, even your habits, like if you're you know, scrolling a lot on the phone or watching TV, like we don't realize how much our kids kind of absorb that.

Carissa Douglas: 10:55

Well, it's the same with prayer. So even we'd be like, okay, we're gonna tuck you in bed and we'd go down and start praying. They could hear us and stuff. So I think they they had a sense of what our prayer life was like. And we found that when we, when our kids became probably around 12 or 13, they started asking us if they could just stay up and pray the rosary with us. And I was like, really? And they're like, no, like they're like, some of us are we do it ourselves in our bed, you know, it's just something comforting that we associate with, you know, right at the end of the day. And so, but if you really okay with it, we'd like to join you. And we're like, this is incredible.

Carissa Douglas: 11:32

This is incredible. Because I remember, you know, my mom being like, guys, come pray the rosary. And and it did feel more like a tour, but this is different. So, so now yeah, like our teenagers, young adults, and some of our uh preteens will will join us and pray that way. So that's that's been great. Um, as I said for the book in terms of um I go to Jesus, we we did sometimes bring them to adoration and try to encourage them to say, you know what, whatever's on your mind. It could even be like mom made me mad today. You can tell them that. I don't mind, you know, but just make sure you ask them to help make me nicer when you do it. So we did do that when they were little.

Carissa Douglas: 12:13

We bring them every now and then to Adoration too. Um at mass, we did tell them to just just stay a little bit after mass, just talk to them a little bit, like, you know, just you know, ask them for what you need through the week. And so again, it it it's a very our faith life in the home is sounds very much like a strong relationship, like you know, where we're constantly trying to to show them that this is somebody who loves you and who's for you and who's going to be with you long before we're you know, or long after we're gone.

Sheila Nonato: 12:42

So and I um I'm also wondering, because I think this is sort of a struggle sometimes for parents, is uh bringing the kids to mass. Now, how do we how do we encourage parents to bring kids to mass? Because sometimes to be honest, there are some people who are um not not enthusiastic about seeing kids, you know, and noisy and all that. So, and yeah, I always when they were very little, then they couldn't sit still. And I mean now still, you know, the little ones still struggle to, but for me, I I'm like, you have to be absolutely quiet, you know, but they can't, they can't sit still. So now I'm like all worried about what are other people thinking. Are they gonna say something to me afterwards, which has happened before. So sometimes good, sometimes not. Um, yeah. So what's your in your experience? How did you handle that? How can you encourage other parents to bring the children?

Carissa Douglas: 13:36

Well, we we we encounter that for sure. Um, and it's hard because there are gonna be some people that it doesn't matter, even if it's the tiniest noise, you might get a dirty look. And it's hard because you you realize there's a lot going on in that person's life to make it so that they really can't tolerate anything. Um, I find that in if you have a good relationship with your priest, um, sometimes like if you express to him, like, you know, we we're really trying here. Like if um our kids will, you know, might be loud at different points, but if they get really loud where it's interrupting where no one can hear, of course, like we just take them to the back and kind of walk around and and then try again, um, and that's fine.

Carissa Douglas: 14:16

But it's really helpful when you have a relationship with your priest and you're able to ask him kind of or to be, I guess, uh a bit of a champion of of young families. And they they usually are because that, you know, the sounds of children in a church mean that the church isn't dying, that the church will continue. It's actually sounds of hope. And there are many priests that I've I've met that are so good at really advocating for parents, like even in the homily or otherwise, like they just really try to thank families for coming.

Carissa Douglas: 14:49

So I try I try to connect with the priest for that. Um, I also find that it's so it almost seems contradictory. But my children, when we were able to bring them to a daily mass here and there, their behavior then on at Sunday would be better. And like I was surprised by that. I guess I'd be like my thought was that maybe they would get tired of it or they'd be more comfortable and so louder. But it seemed like they adapted that better.

Carissa Douglas: 15:18

So I found if we could get even just one mass in during the week that somehow was training them a little more frequently of what, you know, how to be when you're in a church, how to act. Um, I found that it's was hardest when there was just a few little ones because they're all kind of, you know, there's no one setting an example. Whereas now really our older kids set a per beautiful example for the youngers. And so it's easier. The the younger kids at this stage just naturally know that this is what's expected.

Carissa Douglas: 15:51

Like in my older sister is doing it too. And so I, and you know, so there's a lot of beauty in the large families kind of going to mass that you're going to set, I guess, an example by fostering that in the older ones. Um, it's it is hard. Like we have different things to help when they're really little. Like we have we have sippy cups and we work very hard to make sure they don't become like grenades by these kids that throw things or and we, you know, we do have, you know, baby Bibles or things. Like we just we use whatever we can.

Carissa Douglas: 16:23

But I think now that we're older, um, we just it doesn't bother us as much because um it's not we we're we know that it's just a stage. It's just a stage, and and it's only when they're young, really, that you have to do this. If we have to take them to the back, then we have to take them to the back. It's not a big deal. And we know that there's most of the people, even the people that might give you a dirty look, most of them have had to go through it as well.

Carissa Douglas: 16:50

And so it's just they've probably forgotten. Um, I also recognize that the sound is always so much louder to us that as parents than it is to everyone else in the church. Um and for the most part, I we really have been seeing a lot of encouraging um people turning. And I I make it a point even to try to thank young families when I see them struggling when their kids are really loud, just keep smiling at them and encouraging them, saying, you know, thank you for bringing your kids. We know how much work this is, but we can tell you that if you do this, like it will pay off spiritually. And I remember somebody telling me, like, why do you bring them? They don't get anything out of it.

Carissa Douglas: 17:31

And I'm like, no, they they really do, because you know, they may not understand the homily or anything, but they are they are still tapping into those graces. And we know that if we keep doing this, I know that God will use our offering, all of these homilies that we can never hear, or like the, you know, the embarrassment of doing the walk of shame to the back, like all of that, I can offer that for their souls and for my own. And it is more powerful than you could ever imagine. So, like, even though it's very hard, I would encourage all families to just persevere in it, persevere in it, and you will see there there can be such great fruit that comes from it.

Sheila Nonato: 18:09

Definitely. And uh, I recall recently, actually, the priest in his homily had mentioned, you know, I love hearing the babies crying. And I think a few priests have said this, which is great because then it makes the parent not feel so self-conscious. Um, and maybe it's you know, the people uh who are feeling annoyed who need to also change their mentality, and not so much that you know they're they're a uh a burden or an annoyance, but you know, as my husband says, sometimes it's like that person is there maybe to sanctify you. So it's hard. It's hard, it's a hard uh thing to hear, right?

Carissa Douglas: 18:48

It is, and there were there was one woman I remember once, um, and she she just seems so like so affected by any noise from any child in the church. And she would even give them dirty looks or even go up to them after. And I remember her coming up once to ask, and she was like, "Do you feed your children before Mass?" I was like, "Yes." And she's like, "because they're just whiny". And I'm like, "Well, I'm so sorry, but they were just singing Hallelujah. I know it sounded like a whine. I'm really sorry if that bothered you, you know.

Carissa Douglas: 19:18

But but Father loves having them here." And she's like, "Well, he doesn't have children, does he? "And they're like, "But I, as I said, like, you know, they are welcome here. Jesus said that the little children come. So I don't, I don't think He'd want us to, you know, leave them at home". And she was just like, "Yeah, but they don't get anything out of this."

Carissa Douglas: 19:36

And I'm like, you know, "I think they do because they you know, they come back when they're older, usually when this happens." And I said, "Do you have children?" And she's like, "Oh, yes, I have two sons." And I'm like, "Oh, do they still come to Mass?" She just got very quiet. And I said, "Okay. I was like, I'll pray for your sons that they return to the faith." And that was it, you know. And and I realized, okay, maybe that's why. The sounds are are bothering her so much. There could be other reasons like that it's tapping into something, a great wound that, you know, that somehow that irritates just the sound of it because it reminds her of our own children.

Sheila Nonato: 20:15

Well, that's no, that's a good perspective. That yeah, I guess, yeah, I should be praying for those people. Like I, you know, at first you when that that happened to me, I just, you know, like then you're like feeling so self-conscious. You you feel terrible as a parent or something, but then you're like, no, maybe that person needs prayers for something. That's right. Um, and I totally agree with you that it does.

Sheila Nonato: 20:37

My mom took me to Mass when I don't even know what that was, but I just remember the my memory of the candles and being in a church. And I almost left the Catholic church, but I rem I remembered, sorry, I'm gonna cry because it's like one of those pivotal memories. I remember that and the and also the Rosary because I also thought it was really boring, to be honest. We prayed the Rosary every night, and it was boring, repetitive. But like I said, in my adulthood, um, when I was at the Newman Centre, before the Newman Centre, I I almost left the church. But uh yeah, that's what I remembered, the boring Rosary. And uh, and then the candles that I didn't understand. Um it was in my memory. It was, I guess it was a heart memory, you know, like a soul memory that you know it's you never know what's going to sort of resound uh to resonate with with a kid when they're older. You just or it's just the prayer, the prayers of the parent, right? That's just it's graces upon graces upon graces, and it just took 20, 30 years to kind of bear fruit, right? Like we just never know how God is going to use that.

Carissa Douglas: 21:46

Yeah, um, sort of there is a gratitude that we have this time to do that. Like this is our time that we can bring them to to church and have those graces when they're older. Like a lot of times we'll we'll be praying, but we don't have that same opportunity. Um, I remember there was this woman and she saw me bringing my little ones to adoration one time and it just worked out for our schedule again. Like I just do what I can. If if it's too much, I I don't, but it turned out it was a great opportunity. And so I brought them.

Carissa Douglas: 22:16

And I turned and I saw her like just crying. And and she told me afterwards, she said, it's just she's like, I wish I had done that when I had the chance, because now my my you know, my children are grown and I can't bring them to adoration. Like I can't, I can't force them, I can't, I can talk to them, I can pray. She's like, but when they were this age, like I should have brought them to him, you know, and and so the masses are hard. The Masses are hard, Adoration is hard. A lot of what we do, even bringing them to different events, like it's hard sometimes, but this is our time that we have where we're able to do that. And so we kind of see it more um as a gift that we that we're able to do it.

Carissa Douglas: 22:59

And I think that change of perspective is is is really important, that we don't see it as, oh, this is so hard, this is such a burden. It's like I get to take them. I get they're young enough that I still get to, I get this chance to have them be tethered to Christ in every possible way. And of course, afterwards, like what he does with that, like the rest is up to him, but you're definitely planting those seeds and you're you're showing them the light so that if they leave and kind of are entering a darkness, hopefully they will remember that warmth and remember that light and come back to it.

Sheila Nonato: 23:34

Yes, absolutely. And speaking of something that seems hard to people is homeschooling. And I've uh I'm just very kind of new a few years into it, but I've seen how it's not just actually Christians, Catholics, they're like secular groups. There um are people of other faiths, you know, when we go to field trips and then like I see Yeah, it's not um, I mean, it's it's kind of um catching on uh in terms of popularity. How did you discern about homeschooling and is it as hard as people think it is?

Carissa Douglas: 24:10

So um I didn't have a good impression of homeschooling when I was younger, I just because not very many people did it. And so I knew there was this stigma around it that if you homeschool, you're gonna have weird kids, basically, or it just it it was still very new to some degree. I mean, um, so I knew I had to discern it though. I knew that like their education would be a big part of their overall formation, and so um I remember praying with Patrick about it, and we're like, you know, we're we'll see. Our kids were very young at the time that I was really trying to discern it. I think I had a three-year-old um or a two-year-old and one-year-old, and I was pregnant with a third.

Carissa Douglas: 24:52

And um, we were trying, we were going to daily mass at the time because it was just easier the two of us. So we go when Patrick was home from work, and it was easier if the two of us were there to bring the two-year-old and the one-year-old. And we found a church too with a priest that really um, when he spoke, it really nourished our souls, like it really revived us. And so we travel a little bit further to go sometimes to that mass. So I went to the church and um we were specifically asking God to really be clear in terms of what he wanted us to do, that we were willing to do it either way.

Carissa Douglas: 25:25

I think I was more so hoping he would just allow us to or call us to just, you know, go through the school system because I I saw it as a wonderful opportunity for a break. You know, I thought, oh, the kids will all be off and I can do cleaning and I can get everything done. And again, my intervertedness would be fulfilled, that I would have some quiet. Um, so we're sitting there and praying. And then right after mass, there was this woman and she she came up to me and she said, I she goes, I don't want to interrupt your prayers. She's like, but she goes, I just I noticed you.

Carissa Douglas: 25:57

She's like, I this is the first time I'm going to this church. She's like, but it it is more rare to see a couple bringing their their little kids to a daily mass. And she's like, I don't know if you've ever discerned homeschooling. She's like, but I have this group that, you know, of ladies that we've been meeting for years and you know, we homeschooled, but you know, your kids are little, you don't have to homeschool, you could just come. And just if you wanted to hang out with some like-minded Catholic moms, you know, and I just kind of was like, okay, thank you. And so she gave me her information.

Carissa Douglas: 26:29

And then I just turned to Patrick and I'm like, okay. So I guess God has spoken. And he's like, yeah, he has. And so I think God was very good at um just bringing me to these women. Like we, I really needed, I guess, the wisdom and confidence of the uh that these women possessed to allow me to even consider it and to feel like, you know what, maybe this is really a possibility. Maybe I do have what it takes to take this on. Um, we have the spirit, I think, as moms, where like we don't want to ruin their opportunities.

Carissa Douglas: 27:06

We don't want to, you know, uh take away their chances of, I don't know, being a doctor, or we have these like things in mind that that somehow we believed that homeschooling would, you know, um, render it impossible for them to achieve. But I found it was so wonderful. I I was able to, you know, pick their brains and and each of them were different. They were very laid back, beautiful Catholic women. They were funny, down to earth. And they were, they seemed less stressed than a lot of the actual like moms who have kids in school. Like they just they, there was an air about them, there was a joy and a trust, I think.

Carissa Douglas: 27:41

And I I got that from them. And so, and they were each doing it differently. Like they each had a different style, and and they weren't, they weren't really worried about it. And some of them had older kids, and we saw that they were, they got into colleges or universities and they did, you know, really cool things. And so I think it at that moment I'm like, okay, I I think we're being called to do this. And now I am just so grateful because there really is just such a different culture in in their schools. I I know it's not for everyone, but I think if God makes it possible for you, like it's you should offer him a big yes to that and know that he'll just he'll give you what you need, the tools you need to to cater to, whatever child gives you. And I mean, um, and it's always I'm always changing, growing. So my style of homeschooling is actually fairly laid back. Um, we we use the SEATAM program, which is like American.

Carissa Douglas: 28:34

We supplement with um some Canadian, you know, geography and history just to prep them. Um yeah, I again, like there's all kinds of different paths you can take. For us, we actually do the um Ontario has an online program for high school. It's a virtual learning center. And and so our high schoolers do that just so I can focus on the middle schoolers and the preschoolers. But it's at least we know we're able to discuss what they're being taught in class. And it's just it's a very different thing. It it doesn't have the same culture or I'd say cliakiness that can sometimes occur in in high school.

Carissa Douglas: 29:09

And so we're still able to affirm, um, affirm them and and to help offer them confidence, but also teach them how to um dialogue with people of different faiths or even um different opinions. We're able to kind of monitor that and and kind of they have to have that transition into that world to be able to communicate with people with different ideas and be able to advocate for their own and to do so in a charitable and responsible way. So yeah, it's been a journey and I'm still learning. I just, you know, one of our children, um, younger children I've discovered has dyslexia.

Carissa Douglas: 29:42

So that's a new thing, that a new challenge. But I know that every without each child, like God is also, again, trying to stretch me or teach me something and and they're they're uh really the goal at the end of the day is you're trying to foster um virtues. We're trying to form our children. I think that's why it's so popular, um, not just in you know the Catholic faith, but in all kinds of different faiths, because there is a recognition that those virtues don't seem to be being fostered in the same way.

Carissa Douglas: 30:10

And and as a parent, you're so concerned about the formation of the whole person. And you're able to really have that consideration because, like in the home, you can account for where they're at mentally, spiritually, um, psychologically. So you can help work with them where they're at. And again, you just know no one loves your children as much as you do. And and we're, you know, we want a good future for them, and we're able to really um work with them to achieve that.

Sheila Nonato: 30:39

Yes. Um I well I've also done Seton, and um, I can attest that it does um open the door for the kids to want to read the Bible. It might be too Catholic for some people, but I I feel like it was it was a good amount of Catholic, a good dose of Catholic for my kids. Um I mean, even the math, you know, like St. Paul left Ephesus at 9 a.m. and traveled 100 kilometers for an hour and uh what time did he arrive? I don't know, wherever.

Carissa Douglas: 31:10

Yeah, measures, you know, sometimes that it's it's so funny how much that culture is in there.

Sheila Nonato: 31:17

But I feel like because it's so different from the the real world, but not the real world, but the outside world, it's so different. It presents a different kind of um perspective, the Christian perspective that you know, not often seen in the I guess the regular schools. So I I think that was kind of a good balance because it's either no faith or like here's here's faith, here's nothing. Um but yeah, and if there's a mom who's just starting out, um, what would you say to her that you wish you had known when you started this homeschooling journey?

Carissa Douglas: 31:53

I think when I started, I was trying so hard to make our school day resemble the school days that I'd experienced in the brick and mortar schools. And it really isn't. Like it's a it's a different world. And just the nature of homeschooling is probably more comparable to tutoring anyway than than teaching. So you actually save a lot of time that we're able to get a lot of the um work done by noon.

Carissa Douglas: 32:16

And what that means is then after there's a a lot more time for play and for just fellowship and family time. And and so I I think um a new mom starting out should know that she may actually end up experiencing that she's more time than she than she thought she would. Um also not to worry too much, like for I think I think it's easy to doubt ourselves and to also listen to a lot of other people's doubts. Um I when I first kind of told our families that we were gonna homeschool, there was a lot of there was a lot of people that expressed um kind of concern, like, are you a teacher? Do you know, do you are you equipped for this? And and it really, it's easy to take those on and and start to doubt yourself.

Carissa Douglas: 33:00

But I knew that God had called me to it. So I I was like, I'm gonna fight through those thoughts anyway. And and what I realized after is a lot of the what was being expressed was actually their own fears, their own fears of of that maybe I like I wouldn't be able to do that, or you know, so it's it's their own thing. So so I would say try not to listen too much to those who are like really doubting your ability. Um, if God has called you to this and just pray, discern it. And if he seems to be calling you to it, then then he's going to give you what you need to bring your children where they need to be. Um, one really nice thing is um I didn't know at first how my kids would compare to other school children in terms of like grades and things. And when we, when I felt called to do the high schooling through the BLC, um, our kids were finally able to, you know, be compared to other children and I found that they were thriving. They, you know, their grades were really good.

Carissa Douglas: 33:59

And so I think that was God's way of saying, see, you know, it's okay. I know you were afraid, but they're they're doing well. It's it's fine. And I think too, the beauty of homeschooling is accepting, you know, that there's going to be periods where it would be more difficult if you're sick or your children aren't well. And and that's okay because the number one priority is is really that you're just building that that that beautiful family life. Like it really is about the family. It's about um, it's about having that chance to really grow together and being able to spend time together because it goes by so quickly.

Carissa Douglas: 34:35

So I would say for first-time homeschoolers, like know that you what you're doing is a very noble thing. It's a very beautiful thing. And I it may be hard, you may feel like you might be failing, but there you'll look back and be so grateful you had that time with your kids because you'll see how quickly this time passes and how your children are only yours for a very short amount of time in terms of of being able to form them. And then after that, you really don't have that opportunity in the same way. It kind of becomes more of you're there for advice when they come to you, but and then you're there for you know constant prayer, but it it's different. So this this time is really a gift.

Carissa Douglas: 35:13

And if you can, there it there is a really big difference. I I I I love there's so many school children in my life, uh, the brick and school mortar children that, you know, are delightful, wonderful. But I know that it is very difficult to try to counter um the culture within the schools right now. Uh, even my kids will be like, you know, this these kids are really nice, but you know, they don't speak in the nicest way sometimes, or they, you know, there's there's something they can tell that they just they've had to be introduced to things beyond their age level at an early age. And it there is some of them will lose a bit of that spark. And so it's hard, you know, it's a it's a more I would say it's more difficult path to allow them um to go to in the school. And you might have to, that just might be your circumstance. But um, I for those, you know, that are trying to homeschool, I just you are doing something very heroic.

Sheila Nonato: 36:10

Yes, and in terms of as you were mentioning, yeah, maybe even peer pressure about well, specifically now it's like the phones. So we Yes, but we we're trying to live an analog childhood. Um, you know, the Walkman, to be honest, like like my yeah, like my uh daughter was listening to the Walkman, like this old Walkman that I don't know, doesn't work very well. But um yeah, and then the phones, like they still don't have cell phones because I don't know, it's too expensive right now. And I'm thinking, who are you gonna call? You see them every day. Like, what need to call them after? And they usually don't yeah. Well, how do you how do you handle that at your household?

Carissa Douglas: 36:49

Well, we we just we just thought so many, we were like when our when our oldest children were young, that is when all of the smartphones started coming out and the devices and iPads and things. And uh we made a decision early on that it just it didn't seem necessary and we didn't want to, we didn't want more of a temptation for our kids to just stay inside. We wanted them to still want to go outside and play or do other things. And we're we just had a sense like this not might not be good.

Carissa Douglas: 37:16

But we're very grateful to God that He kind of put that on our hearts because so many of their peers or even certain family members where they would just give them phones and things. There was they just the core parents had no idea the door that that would be opened to their children. They had no idea what would slip in.

Carissa Douglas: 37:34

And I just I've seen such heartache and you know, addictions, even you know, pornography or even within the video games that they would be playing, like just just such addictive tendencies for these little minds. And and so it was heartbreaking. It's and um especially for like the people that I love very much, children that I love, but I see them carrying a burden that even is difficult for adults to carry.

Carissa Douglas: 38:01

And that was heartbreaking. So I'm grateful that God put that on our hearts. We have a our what we do in our family is basically um, if you want to get a phone, you have to be 18 and you have to be, you know, working so that you can pay for your own plan and and take care of that. Usually at that time they're they're off off to school or they're working anyway. So it really is important. And hopefully at that point we've um warned them enough about, you know, not kind of not allowing themselves to spend too much time on it to try to to try to preserve their brains and their minds. Um and then for um younger kids that like so we have our kids usually start to work at 15, maybe at the library or different places.

Carissa Douglas: 38:44

And so we have a phone that um is a dumb phone, but we can call them or they can they can call us like to pick them up. So we still have that as an emergency measure, but um, but we really are trying to encourage them to just experience the world um in a real way, as long as they can.

Sheila Nonato: 39:05

Yes. And I I was reading about how there was like this kind of movement towards um the landlines, like parents are going towards the landlines. And I know um a a good friend in Washington, DC, what she did was she asked her friends, her, you know, the parents, um, you know, would you want us like they actually have I think it's a contract, if I'm not mistaken. Like they sign this thing where I'm not gonna get a phone for my kid. Like it's kind of like an act of solidarity. Um and if they need a phone, like they kind of borrow from somebody who has, you know, at school or like they, you know, just so that yeah, they're all in this together. And it's it's hard if um if you're just alone, right? If you're the lone one who doesn't have this thing or that thing. Yeah.

Carissa Douglas: 39:50

Um and then also homeschooling, like they there's not, as you said, there's not that pressure as much. Like, you know, it's fine. I mean, they'll still come across people they'll meet at youth group or something who will be like, Okay, what's your number? And they're like, uh, don't have a phone, but I do have a ley line and you here's my number, like you can still call me. But it it is hard when everyone's into a culture of texting or, you know, connecting in that way. So there can be moments where your kids feel a little bit like, oh, this is hard. You know, like it's harder to make friends sometimes or, you know, because they rely so much on that. So that is the hit. But I kind of tell them, well, I know that's the cost, but that is what it is. And you can offer that for your future and that that God will bless you with very rich relationships and friendships. And, you know, that you'll again you'll have been able to engage the world and and embrace the world in a way that some of these kids find it difficult to do.

Sheila Nonato: 40:46

And just to circle back too, uh, we started off uh with um Mother Mary. How does she sort of inspire your motherhood?

Carissa Douglas: 40:56

Well, she's been such an important part. Like as I said, when I was a child, um I had that image like of her coming and wrapping her veil around me. And, you know, and I still kind of see her as sustaining me and helping me. It's it's funny, um, we were talking about my book series, and I had done the children's book and then moved into um books for like tweens and teens. Um, my latest book is actually a board book, a baby book, maybe because I'm entering that again. And the the book that I came up with is called "Mother Mary's Heart." And it's just it takes some of those images that um I had when I was a child.

Carissa Douglas: 41:34

And it, they're now in this book, and they're just showing how how Mary took such beautiful, loving care of Jesus and how she's still doing that for us now, and just kind of showing images of of how she is trying to enter our lives now and be that mother because she's still, she's still present. So she's in that way, she's very influential. I I find that um depending on what challenge a particular child is going through, sometimes I realize they they need Mother Mary. They need that, um, I guess those images in their mind to help them through or help um console them.

Carissa Douglas: 42:11

And so I oftentimes, you know, try to um bring her into it when we're talking about an issue that they're going through, like I'll offer like a particular prayer to her, or um, even in terms of like even purity. I think Mother Mary's so powerful in in being able to um put that cincture of of of purity around the waist of her children. And so sometimes even like um as kids get older if they're struggling with things like that, I'll specifically bring in Mary and and you know, just say, she, she in particular, you need to call on her. Or even in terms of uh spiritual battles, there's something she's such she's so powerful in those moments when you feel you're being attacked in in whatever way.

Carissa Douglas: 42:56

And so for my kids, um, sometimes in a very clear way, I'll be like, you need Mary, you need her to come and and to be your mom and through this, and you need her to kind of take care of business, like with all of these forces that are saying, you know, terrible things to you. Or um, there's so many times where my kids will tell me like the doubts or these these words that keep coming to their mind. And I'm just like, it sounds like somebody's working really hard to stop you from doing something that you're gonna be really good at doing. And then like you need Mother Mary. She's really good at like coming in and you know, and cleaning up the mess and stepping on somebody's head and stopping them from speaking those words.

Sheila Nonato: 43:39

Absolutely. And I remember um it was an exorcist, I think it was Father Dan Rahil, who was saying he was doing everything exorcism, prayers, everything. Nothing was working. And then he just, I guess, inspiration. He saw Our Lady of Guadalupe uh painting, and he said, Go to your mother, look to your mother. "

Carissa Douglas: 43:57

Calling my mom."

Sheila Nonato: 43:58

And she, that's it. That was it. Like she came and (the demon was) gone.

Carissa Douglas: 44:02

That's exactly that's it. She comes in their business and she does it in the most graceful, easy, perfect way. So it's uh, I think they're understanding her nature and her role in their spiritual lives, uh, very distinct, very distinct role for her.

Sheila Nonato: 44:19

Absolutely. And again, it you know, as we were talking about the phones and unfortunately, foreign culture, only fans, you know, unfortunately, a lot of woundedness causing a lot of woundedness for for women and even for men, because they don't know how to treat women. Um if we're allowing ourselves to be degraded in certain ways, or the society is degrading us in certain ways, but Mother Mary is there to show us the example that we have dignity, we have grace, we have God. And and how what's the message for your daughters finally? To um, you know, how do we raise daughters to be God-fearing women like Mother Mary?

Carissa Douglas: 45:00

I think it comes back to kind of what my mom tried to do with us, that idea of raising your daughters to know that they've been set apart. And it's it's hard because um, especially when they get to the age where they're starting to um feel called to marriage, and so they're looking at at people. And it's it's hard when they're they're realizing that they're they feel like they're competing with some of these girls that will dress in ways like to try to, you know, attract guys and um or even just put on certain uh almost fake types of like flirtatiousness, but like in a very um where it almost feels like a manipulative or conniving way.

Carissa Douglas: 45:41

And I just try to keep reminding them like, no, like the most beautiful woman is Mary. And and part of that is she's humble, but but the humility is just knowing that everything she is is from God. Everything that she was given is beautiful and good, but given from God. And then like just, you know, you're being set apart. Um, you can you can trust that as long as you're trying to um really just embrace those qualities that that Mary has exemplified, um, God, like you can put this in his hands.

Carissa Douglas: 46:13

He will open the eyes to to the person, you know, who is called to be with you. If you're called to marriage, he will, he will bring them to you, like he will present you to them in, but you you don't have to like, you don't have to be anything you're not. You don't have to dress in a way that you know is not, you know, becoming in terms of who you are spiritually and and uh affirming up your dignity. And it's like just you just have to trust in God.

Carissa Douglas: 46:39

So Mary's a beautiful way of kind of showing that there is a beauty that you know surpasses all, and and it's in Mary. And she exemplifies that, and and just the more we try to fashion ourselves to be more like her, to um be humble, but humble in in a way that we just we understand that everything we're given, any gifts, any talents, any beauty, is all a gift from God, and we can rejoice in it. But like know that it's because God has been just the perfect um creator, the perfect illustrator in our lives.

Carissa Douglas: 47:12

A nd yeah. So I think I think just affirming them in that, just like be just always be aware of your dignity and don't let that go. And trust that God, if you are called to marriage, he knows the person that that would suit you really well, that that you'd be able to carry on the mission that he has prepared for you and in within your creation, within I almost to every part of who you are is is for this beautiful purpose, and he'll bring you to that.

Sheila Nonato: 47:38

Yes, absolutely. Your worth is not uh based on likes, your worth is rooted in um Jesus Christ and his love, is unconditional, God's unconditional love and mercy. And I appreciate you coming onto the podcast. And where can um listeners find your books, find your work? Are you going to be speaking anywhere?

Carissa Douglas: 47:59

So um as far as uh works and books, um most of them are sold um through Scepter Publishers.

Sheila Nonato: 48:06

Um there are there are Canadian distributors for your Canadian listeners. Um it's it's a bit more difficult because of uh just it's harder for them to, I guess, to get the product here. But there are, I know that there are many um Canadian stores. I think Sunrise might carry them and um just you just have to look up for Canadian distribution. Um they are in the States as well. Um the newest book, I haven't decided how I'm going to distribute that, but I I'm actually more tempted to keep it in Canada, the product, so that it will be easier for Canadians to access it and then maybe we'll expand to the states.

Sheila Nonato: 48:41

So um we have a website that's littledglings.com. And if you go there, um you can find ways of of purchasing any of the materials that you'd like. Um, in terms of speaking engagements, that I find that this stage of my life I've been shying away from too many, just in terms of trying to defend my time with my children and and the scope of, I guess, what God's given me right now is pretty big. So we've been focusing on that. But any events that that I'll be participating in, I'll make sure that we add that to the website as well. Okay, amazing. And I I went on a retreat at Cedar Crest and they have your books. So I bought some books there. And I think is it Sunrise Marian? Is that the one in Waterloo? I forget how to carry it. But yeah, I saw them there too. Yeah.

Carissa Douglas: 49:30

I think there's the St. Joseph the Worker. There's different different stores carry them. So yeah, hopefully we can get you copies of of any of the books that that interest you.

Sheila Nonato: 49:40

Okay, awesome. I'll try to I'll put it in the show notes so they can find it more easily. So yeah, thank you so much. Did you want to close with a quick prayer or sure?

Carissa Douglas: 49:49

At first, thank you so much for for this time with you two. It was really lovely. It's always lovely to talk to other other women who are striving for holiness in our families. And so I really appreciate that. And uh yeah, we'll end in a prayer in the name of the Father and the Son and Holy Spirit, Amen. Lord, we thank you so much for this time.

Carissa Douglas: 50:08

We thank you so much for this conversation, and we pray that uh you will continue, just be our everything, be our provision, be the guide, be the one who tells us what you would have us do, and we will and help us, help us come to that place of always saying yes to you because your way is so beautiful and so perfect. And we pray that you'll always keep us in a state of hope, joy, and grace, and that you will strengthen us when the trials come. We thank you again for calling us to our vocations. Please, Lord, be with us in every moment.

Carissa Douglas: 50:45

In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Speaker 3: 50:49

Thank you, Carissa. This is honestly the conversation I needed because as I was mentioning earlier, I've been having colds here and there, and sometimes like I can't do it, I can't do it. And today I'm like, if I can't do it, Carissa can do it, so I can do it. Thank you very much, Carissa, for your inspiration. God bless you.

Sheila Nonato: 51:07

OUTRO: Thank you very much for joining us today. We sincerely appreciate all your prayers, all your comments. We are happy to hear from you. May we find hope in Carissa's story in whatever vocation God is calling us to marriage, single life, or religious life. May we be guided in our own personal journey towards holiness, towards that vocation that God is calling us to. Or if we've already been called to that vocation, may we be encouraged and emboldened to continue in that pursuit of holiness and peace and joy in Jesus Christ.

Sheila Nonato: 51:45

Please join us next time when we speak with Mr. Alan Smith, the director of the Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen Mission Society of Canada, who is a Catholic media personality that you've likely heard or seen on EWTN. And he will speak about Venerable Bishop Sheen, the status of his cause for canonization, the Bishop's great admiration for St. Therese, and her feminine genius of everyday holiness and deep love for Jesus. And have a blessed, blessed new year, and peace to your homes this Christmas and always.