Heart to Heart with Hads
Welcome to Heart to Heart with Hads, the podcast where we dive deep into living a healthy, badass lifestyle that challenges the norm. Join me, Hads, as I share stories that have shaped my journey toward becoming the best version of myself, defying expectations and embracing big goals—including my pursuit of bodybuilding. As a young person navigating a world filled with stereotypes and expectations, I'm here to inspire others to break free from the typical 20-year-old narrative and forge their own path. Throughout this podcast journey, I'll bring on guests who have played pivotal roles in my life, sharing their wisdom, experiences, and perspectives. Get ready for candid conversations, valuable insights, and a whole lot of inspiration to live authentically and fearlessly. It's time to open our hearts, challenge the status quo, and embrace the journey of self-discovery together. Welcome to Heart to Heart with Hads, where we dare to be different, pursue our passions, and live life on our own terms.
Heart to Heart with Hads
Mindset Rewiring Pt 2 | 3 Reasons You're Not Seeing Results
Our unique abilities and strengths should be celebrated, not hidden away. We need to stop negotiating with ourselves, ask for help, and give ourselves time to realize our full potential.
• Stop negotiating with yourself by establishing non-negotiables in your life
• Make time for things that are priorities instead of making excuses
• Write down your non-negotiables and create triggers to remember them
• One decision can change the entire trajectory of your life
• Ask for help from those who have expertise - it shows maturity, not weakness
• Having coaches and mentors accelerates your progress and growth
• Real transformation takes time - 90 days is not enough for lasting change
• Growth happens during challenges and difficulties, not when things are easy
• Visualize your success to begin living as your future self today
• Your liver, gut, and hormones are connected systems that affect overall health
Ready to transform your health and get your hormones under control? I've helped many clients overcome health challenges, from preventing fatty liver disease to losing weight. Your liver is the body's detox system - when it's functioning properly, everything else can follow.
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Hello, hello everybody, and welcome back to another episode of Hearts Hair with Hats. Let me get this little board situated here. I'm so glad to have you here. I'm back in my pink couch oasis, which is covered with hair, because the dogs have been in here giving me lots of good company, but also lots of shedding on the pink couch. You can totally see Today if you're watching on YouTube. I'm in my little purple.
Speaker 1:Onesie actually was at the gym today and I made a post about this on instagram. About that. We need to stop being so afraid to take up space, that we are meant for more than just hiding in the corner. We're meant for more than just pushing our feelings aside and we're meant to wear a purple suit in the gym, a wrestling suit. Who cares? I was having a mental battle with myself the whole time on the way there. I was like this is going to be too revealing. I'm not going to want to record this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. And then I got there and I was like you know what, hadley, stop being so afraid. You are different. You're unique. Do you see anybody else around here in a purple suit recording themselves taking content for Instagram? No, you're an outlier. Be proud of that. You're different than everybody else. So that's just my little rant for the day. Stop being so afraid to take up space. Now we're going to get into the real reason here, the real episode. Like I said, we're doing a little mindset and identity rewiring.
Speaker 1:So this is episode two. On that, I have my little peeking notebook here, if you're watching on YouTube, and I have all my notes right now. I've been just like giving myself 30 minutes a day to write down my feelings, write down my thoughts, the energy that I want to bring, and I feel like this really helps me. Instead of starting my day from with consuming, I'm starting it with creating, and once you can shift your energy over to that. I'm not perfect on it, but I'm getting better. And when I recognize myself looking trying to get ideas from other people, I immediately go no, I put my phone up and I'm like sit in your own thoughts for a second here. What are you trying to create? What are views you're trying to change and then create from that space, not from whatever you see somebody else doing. So today's topic is three reasons. You're not seeing results and we're going to dive just right into it. So this episode may be a little bit shorter just because it's three reasons, but I'll try to give as much depth as I can to each of them.
Speaker 1:And the first one is you keep negotiating with yourself, and what I mean by this is that you keep telling yourself it's okay. You keep putting it off till tomorrow, till next week. Keep putting it off till tomorrow, till next week. The second, the second the thought comes up of you not wanting to do something. I was thinking the same thing about this podcast episode right before I sat. I'm gonna do it. I was like, oh no, it's so nice outside, I could go lay outside and play with the dogs. And you know what I was like no, I am not doing that.
Speaker 1:I told myself that I was going to show up and do my podcast episodes consistently for the rest of the year, for literally a whole year. I have literally outline of what I want to do, what I want to talk about for the next year, and I'm going to do it, because I'm not going to not do what I say, I'm not going to go against my word. And that's a lot of people's problems is that they keep negotiating with themselves, that they keep saying, oh, but it's okay because this or oh, there's this going on, so I can't do that. No, do the things that you know you have to do. That are going to take you to the next level when we're talking about fitness. Sorry, I'm looking at my notes so I want to make sure that I hit every point, just as an example. Always I will throw fitness in there, thinking it's okay, I didn't have time today. But the reality is, you make time for the things that you prioritize and if, if something, if you're, if your goal is to get into the gym and make your health a priority and lose body fat or gain muscle, but you tell yourself that you don't have time today, you're setting yourself up for success. That should already be ingrained and planned in your day. That should be in your calendar. We're not reinventing the wheel here. This is something that you have to do. It's a non-negotiable.
Speaker 1:One thing that I made all of my clients do this past week is I made them send me three non-negotiables for the week, and these non-negotiables needed to be things that weren't necessarily easy for them to do. It was something that may be a little bit challenging for them to get done during the week and, for example, I told them that I was going to, my non-negotiables for myself were I was not going to get on my phone for the last two hours before bed and I was not going to, or I was going to meditate at least 20 minutes a day and then I was going to go on an outdoor walk with no phone. Those are my three non-negotiables for the day, and the way that I will remember them is I will write a little sticky note. I will do this at this time or when this happens. So for me it was I will go on an outdoor walk for one hour after I finished my work day, and that's usually around like five, four or five, and usually five, and so I would make that a non-negotiable. I would write that down.
Speaker 1:Another one I will meditate for 20 minutes, and I do that in the morning, so I will meditate for 20 mornings first thing when I get up. So I intentionally wake up 30 minutes earlier so I can do my morning meditation. And just a little funny side note, little tangent I've been falling asleep. Even if I sit up, I've been falling back asleep, so something. I sit up, I've been falling back asleep, so something's wrong with me. I need to snap out of that. Maybe I need to like go walk around a little bit before I sit down and do my meditation. I'm not really sure I need to experiment with that, but I've been 17, no, 18 days consistent with doing that. I'm so proud of myself. I'm on my way to 30. And then, once I hit 30, I'm going to set a goal for 100 days. 100 days of meditation.
Speaker 1:It's not just to check off a box, it's to be very intentional with myself and, if you can also do that, to remind yourself that Some of the things that you're doing shouldn't be just to check off a box just to say, oh, I did that. Like you know, if you have a coach, I'll just say myself for example, I'm not doing some of these things just to check off a box. I'm doing them because I know that they're going to get me to the next level. I know that it's going to be the best thing for my health. For example, 12,000 steps a day is non-negotiable for me right now, because my coach said all right, we got to get 12,000 steps so that we can we can get your total activity up for the day, so that we're not putting on extra body fat while trying to bump up your calories and build muscle. Okay, Now that I know the why behind that, that that's ingrained in my head. That's what I'm going to be thinking about whenever I'm sitting there thinking, oh, I don't want to get up and go to my steps. No, I do want to get up and do my steps because I don't want to put on additional body fat whenever I'm in this build season. So, whenever you can sit there and stop negotiating back and forth with yourself and actually just do the damn thing because you know the why behind it, your intention behind it is strong everything will change.
Speaker 1:Another thing, so that was fitness, wise nutrition. Oh, it's one piece of cookie. It doesn't affect anything. No, it does, because it teaches your brain that it's okay to give into temptations because you deserve them. Are you what did write? I put it does. It teaches your brain that it's okay to give it temptations because you deserve it. But the reality is you deserve to show yourself enough respect to do what's necessary to reach your goals. Let me read that again you don't deserve to give in to the temptations. You deserve to show yourself enough respect to do what's necessary to reach your goals.
Speaker 1:Nothing changes if you keep saying, oh, I'll do it when Life will literally pass you by, if you keep making this statement to yourself. There's no better time to do anything than right now, because you're never going to get this day back. You're never going to get this moment back. And one thing that always has stuck with me is you're one decision away from changing the entire trajectory of your life. That statement alone gets me fired up. Just one decision, one simple thing you could do that could take you to the next level.
Speaker 1:And I wholeheartedly believe that my coaching program, what I offer to people, what I'm helping people overcome, will change the trajectory of their life. And I've seen it happen with so many people. They've changed their mindset about not only their health but their overall life and they've been able to hold their ground, be strong both mentally and physically. And I think that's important and I have experienced that myself because I've had a coach for three years now and this person has not only taught me yeah, you need to prioritize your health, but health is wealth.
Speaker 1:Without my health, I literally would have nothing. I would have nothing at all. No-transcript pages a day. When I know that's non-negotiable for myself. I was like, oh, I don't need. Like, oh, I don't have time for that today, I can do something else. No, I did. I just needed to swap scrolling on my phone for reading my book whenever I'm walking on the treadmill and that changed everything. Just putting my phone up, putting it on do not disturb and just going and just walking and just getting in flow of reading that book, and the book itself has changed my life. So I'm looking at it right now, so I keep looking over. It's breaking the habit of being yourself. It has nothing to do with changing who you are Well, it does but it's changing your mindset, changing the way you rewire your thinking and your thoughts and your emotions. And yeah, it's pretty freaking good, like probably top three best books I've ever read. Highly recommend it. All right, let's get into number two, because that was quite a big rant for me.
Speaker 1:You don't ask for help. This is the number two reason that you're not seeing results. I don't understand. I do understand because I've been this way. Why do we think that it's that we're superior when we don't ask for help, whenever we do things on our own?
Speaker 1:I think it's very mature and it's very okay to ask for help. You think that you can do everything on your own and you think you know everything. We, as humans, think that we can. We know how to do everything. We can do everything. Like we're capable of doing everything, like we are so strong we can do this, we know everything. The truth is you don't. You're not experienced in things that you think that you are. If you were, you would see. If you were experiencing those things, you would have already seen results right now. So I don't get why you asking for help is such a big deal.
Speaker 1:I used to be this way too, because I was like oh, I can do it on my own Whenever. You're young, too, at a young age, you think, yes, like, I want to be so independent, I want to do things on my own. And while that's cool and all, asking for help is shows a really big piece of you, it shows that you're not like. You does show that you're weak, because it shows that you think your ego is too big when it's really not Like. You need to let down the ego. You need to ask for help on something that you don't know how to do. This is huge. This is huge, huge, huge. All right, I'll make this episode pretty short, honestly.
Speaker 1:Oh, actually, I did want to mention that I have two coaches, I have two mentors. I have a coach for my fitness and I have a coach for business, and both of them helped me excel in two different areas of life. And I spend a lot of money on that, a lot of money on that, and it's worth it, because I wouldn't be where I'm at without the help, because I don't know everything. I'm still learning. I still learn from my fitness coach even though I'm a coach, and I still learn from my business coach, because obviously, I haven't even been in business for a whole year. I don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1:One of the very first things I did was hire a coach for my business. Same thing with fitness. If I want to be the best, why would I not learn from the best, from someone who has done it and who has seen the results and shown it? That's my thing too, that people will not want to ask for help or have a coach or have a mentor. They're okay with being okay. Then that's fine. You can totally be okay with just being the bare minimum. Whenever you have a coach, you're superior because you're learning from the best. You're getting info and you're getting knowledge and you're growing in ways that nobody else around you is because, oh, I don't need help, I can do it on my own, that's easy. But yeah, you don't. You still look the same. Your business still doesn't make any money. Like, be so for real. So for real, anyways. That was a little side change that I needed to sprinkle in there, anyways.
Speaker 1:Number three you don't let yourself see your potential. You don't give yourself enough time to see how much you could do. Let me rephrase that you do not give yourself enough time to see the results that you could. Now I see this all the time. People will come to me, they want my help and they're like, yeah, let's three months, let's do this, that and the other. That's not enough time. That is enough time for you to try and fail and try and fail, maybe one or two times. But the thing is, real results do not come overnight. They do not come in three months, they do not come in 90 days. If you want a full transformation that's going to take forever. Your, your whole life is a transformation that is going to take you forever. Now, I'm not taking you out, I'm not talking. You know, losing body fat, it's not going to take you forever. But becoming healthier in your lifestyle and having a better mindset towards everything, it's a lifelong journey. It's a lifelong process. So you expecting it to come overnight, whenever it doesn't quite work like that? Why you don't give yourself, allow yourself time to see the full potential that you could have?
Speaker 1:If you think about, say, you went to school, you first of all, whenever we're in, we start out as kids. Right, we start out in preschool or either kindergarten, and it takes us 12 grades. Think about that. 12 grades, how does that make sense? 12 grades, but by the time you graduate, you're 18. Oh, because you don't start school till you're like five or six. Okay, it makes sense. I, I don't think you're stupid. No, I'm not. Anyways, you have to go through 12 grades just to finally say, oh, I, I did it like I don't have to go to school. I don't have to go to school anymore, unless you go to college, or I don't have to listen to my parents anymore, whatever. But in those moments you're not thinking like, oh, I wonder what I'm going to be like at grade seven. No, you're engulfed in where you're at right now. You want to be the best where you're at. In first grade I did anyways.
Speaker 1:I remember when I was in first grade we would have so many little challenges. It was like the first person to write to a thousand, like they were the shit of the class and I was like, oh my gosh class. And I was like, oh my gosh, but we don't have certain amounts in our day, certain time in our day to be able to write our numbers. They would like set timers and I'm like what do you write? Like writing so fast, because I was like I want to be that first person to get to a thousand and I'm not. I suck, and yeah, that's just been my mindset for so long. Obviously that's transpired into where I'm at right now in life, if you can't tell, but then I'm always just like, yeah, let's go, go, go, go, go. I'm trying to be better about just like slowing down, embracing where I'm at. Anyways, the thing is is like you try to be the best of where you're at in that grade. You're not thinking about, oh, what's coming next? So give yourself the potential to just, or allow yourself to have time to see that potential with where you're at. I know that was didn't really make sense on my storytelling, but it kind of made sense in my head and I tried to tell him it was still makes sense.
Speaker 1:Anyways, one thing that I've been doing is visualizing my success, and so that's what I mean. When I'm doing my meditations, I'm literally visualizing what success looks like to me. I'm like, oh no, I don't, I don't sit there like, oh no, that's not how it goes. Literally guided meditations on inside timer hashtag plug. I'm plugging that for you. I ate too much before I sat down here. No, I didn't, I ate what I was supposed to eat. Well, I just I'm eating a lot more. Like 280 grams of carbs seems like a lot to me, for whatever reason.
Speaker 1:Anywho, let me get back to what I was talking about Visualizing success. I will sit down and in my meditation and one of the things I do is visualize, like where I want to be in 10 years, or what success looks like me even tomorrow, where I want to be in 10 years, or what success looks like me even tomorrow. And once you can visualize what success looks like to you, you can start to begin to live your life like that, like that success. So really good tip for you guys.
Speaker 1:Oh, another thing, too, is just stop giving up when it's hard. This goes into number three of you know, not letting yourself see your potential. When shit gets hard and you're struggling, that's where the freaking growth happens. That's where you learn and heal so much about yourself, because you've never experienced anything like that before. If shit was easy if it was easy everyone would be doing it, and that's why you don't see very many people who are fit. You see a lot more people who are overweight and fat Because guess what? They don't give themselves enough time. They think it's going to happen easy. They think they're going to have a quick fix. They don't give themselves enough time to see their potential because they've been stuck at this place for so long. Just give it time, give it time. Give it time. Time heals everything. Time changes everything. As long as you're showing up and doing that work, all right. That's all I got for you guys today.
Speaker 1:It was only a 19 minute episode. I'm looking over here at my recording, but I feel like it was a good one and I feel like it needed to be said. All the things I said definitely needed to be said. So take action, and you know what you need to take action on your health and your fitness and you need to lose body fat and you need to take control of your hormones. Your doctors aren't helping and you've gotten your labs done and you feel like you're doing. You feel like you know what you're doing, you're doing everything right, but you still feel like crap.
Speaker 1:I can help you. I've helped so many people. So many people have come to me like, oh, I just want to feel good. I've literally had someone come to me and her liver enzymes were so skewed. They were like you're on the verge of fatty liver disease. You literally are almost there and I was able to help her not have that. She lost nearly 20 pounds in the process while doing that, while clearing out her liver, because your liver is the detox of everything. If your liver is backed up, everything's going to be backed up. Liver gut hormones is the detox of everything. If your liver is backed up, everything's going to be backed up Liver gut hormones. That's how it works. Start with the liver, liver feeds into the gut. Once your gut's healed, your hormones will be fixed. Thank me later and I'll help you through it. Okay, love y'all, kisses.