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Strip Clubs, Snails & Superstorms: Your New Guilty Pleasure
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Shit, hey, what's happening. Sorry, I had a late-minute adjustment. That sounds like.
Speaker 2:You know us, men we normally have to adjust some things last minute.
Speaker 1:What's up?
Speaker 2:bro, we always get caught doing it in inappropriate times.
Speaker 1:It's like caught masturbating by your wife Boy. That's completely different. We've discussed that before.
Speaker 2:Just you're repositioning your junk and getting caught masturbating.
Speaker 1:Oh no, two totally different things before just you're repositioning your your junk and getting caught in mash.
Speaker 2:Oh no, I'm totally everything I'm done oh, I thought we were still talking about that. What up big dope? Well, not much man, not much how you doing man, I am living the dream. Yeah, I'm exhausted, but I'm living the dream, yeah, yeah, you work quite a bit. This weekend I worked you worked how's that knee going?
Speaker 1:I was dead yesterday I was saturday, I dead. And then yesterday I was, it was bad. And then last night, like I told her, I don't even remember what time- it was. We went to bed early last night. I was like my knee is throbbing.
Speaker 3:I'm out of here. It was like 8 o'clock, I think. Well, we were in the middle of a show and it was just like hey, yeah, let's going yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so we want to introduce. We got Drayton. This is Mike's oldest son and our producer. We're not sure what we're going to call you yet. We need a nickname for Mom. What did you call Mom behind her back when you were kids?
Speaker 3:Who'd you call the greatest mother ever? Oh, now she's going to cry. You know, just the just only good things.
Speaker 2:Only good things. Okay, cry, you know just the just only good things, only good things, okay. Okay, we'll go with that, all right. So yeah we. We got him on the show, you know, we thought we'd get some youth on the show. Um damn, I don't know if you can tell by this picture, he's definitely a lot younger than us, so we're old folks.
Speaker 1:We're definitely all rolling with your beard. I appreciate it. I dye my beard white. The women love it. The gray does look good, though the women love it, the gray does look good, though. The women love it.
Speaker 2:So Dre what have you been doing? You just hanging out at the parents' house.
Speaker 3:Yeah, just normally when I'm at the house I have a PC that I do everything on and that unfortunately had its demise for a second, so it's like fuck it, let me come out here and hang out. I haven't spent time with them in a minute, so all it takes is a pc to break me.
Speaker 1:See his parents. That's not the only reason I paid devin to break it. By the way, ain't been out here since thanksgiving or christmas not literally so I mean so what kind of pc you play with?
Speaker 3:uh, I mean just, I think I spent like probably 1500 on it, but I had it during COVID, so it's been a couple years.
Speaker 2:Could I have bought one just recently? I don't have it yet. I hope my wife don't hear it, oh shit. It hasn't showed up yet. Here we go. Here we go. I paid $15 for it. Yeah, of course of course.
Speaker 1:Of course it was in the denit section. Of course Of course it was in the denit section.
Speaker 2:We won't talk about that, but so do these things.
Speaker 1:So I'm not computer, I'm the most computer illiterate person. These things, just what do they wear out the memory.
Speaker 3:Like what happened. There's so many things internally that could happen.
Speaker 2:Because it's running on overdrive.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no, you could have a loose cable, something like that, or with me. Me it's damn near on 10 hours of the day, probably, so it's hot. Yeah, I do, I do everything on it.
Speaker 2:Make beats watch youtube play games, so watch porn. The only reason I got, the only thing I don't do you get viruses that way you do get viruses. This iRacing game that you know I always play, the nascar you have the whole setup I got you, but this iRacing is like legit iRacing is that the sim.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you have the whole race setup.
Speaker 4:Oh yeah you, but this iRacing is like legit iRacing. Is that the sim? Yeah?
Speaker 3:You have the whole race setup. Oh yeah, I do it at the house, bro, he's got it, it's all posted up, he's got the shifter, the deal.
Speaker 1:It's all on the desk. It looks cool though.
Speaker 2:It's got its own stand and everything Pedals. It's the only way you can play. It is on PC, because the graphics are so intense. That's why I have all those monitors. You can't have more than one monitor on a PlayStation. Well, you can, but it's just like playing the same thing as this one, but on the PC I could have three monitors, so I could have one in my face and I could have two on the side, so it looks like I'm looking out my side mirrors or outside windows. Dude, it's supposed to be legit and how old are you?
Speaker 1:damn who said she could chime in. Yeah, whatever makes you happy.
Speaker 3:It doesn't matter how old you are she went from.
Speaker 1:I don't want to talk to now. She won't shut the up.
Speaker 2:I think you know I find it fun. I mean my kids obviously raised. You know, close to being raised. He turned 18 this past weekend.
Speaker 1:Yeah, get up, motherfucker. That's what everybody keeps telling him. You got to leave, you got to leave. He's got a year and a half. He got a year and a half, then you got to go.
Speaker 2:And then you get one chance after you fucking left to come back. You get one opportunity.
Speaker 1:One shot opportunity one shot, one shot everybody says, I'll give in every time.
Speaker 3:But not me. I haven't used my uh come back home free card yet, so y'all still owe me that's right, but I never put a limit of one so you can always come home to mama oh you got.
Speaker 1:I always say these motherfuckers ain't coming home there's a reason, I have one you know, so I've got.
Speaker 2:If I did it with those three, I got to do it with mine too.
Speaker 1:It's like our spending the night deal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if I get kicked out, you can stay for three nights and then you got to go. I'm allowed to stay for three nights and then I got to go somewhere for another night and then come back.
Speaker 3:There you go, hey that's been a rule for a minute too. Really, even back with Sumo and everything.
Speaker 1:That's what started the rule with sumo. It was chase.
Speaker 3:Oh, it was chase.
Speaker 4:It was chase first, then sumo had to live through it. Oh okay, I love those nights too. Yeah, when he would leave.
Speaker 3:No, no, no, when they were there, I bet just having someone new in the house it's always there, especially sumo he's fucking. He's one of the funniest dudes I've ever met, so yeah, just sleeping on in the back patio count.
Speaker 2:So if I was in the house, as long as I don't come back in the house, I could hang out in the backyard. Yeah, I guess.
Speaker 1:You can't sleep in the garage.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah.
Speaker 1:Because that's part of the house.
Speaker 2:It's an extension of the house.
Speaker 1:I can sleep amongst the stars.
Speaker 4:You can sleep on the. You're fucked. There's a roof over your head.
Speaker 2:There is an umbrella. There isn't a big umbrella under there. Me and fucking Tootle Butt will snuggle when you let him out.
Speaker 1:Tootle Butt. You know fucking First off, he wouldn't leave you outside by yourself.
Speaker 2:He wouldn't, he wouldn't. You know, that's my dog.
Speaker 1:It's just I had to run over to.
Speaker 4:Buddy's house Montana early today, the only one that would go with me. Everybody else wanted to take a nap.
Speaker 1:They bailed on me, except for my boy over there. The show mascot. I couldn't get that out of there, but when Montana got in the truck he fucking lost his shit. Montana's trying to get in the truck. It's like kung fu fighting. You hear that song?
Speaker 3:That's the dog I'm assuming, yeah.
Speaker 1:That's awesome man.
Speaker 2:But definitely. I know it was his birthday too, this past weekend. Yeah, he turned three Saturday I was at Walmart and I was like, oh, he needs one of these, he needs one of these. Oh yeah, he caught a rabbit the other night and we had to give it away. You know you can't eat the rabbit, exactly. So I bought him a stuffed rabbit. He tore that sucker up instantly speaking of yeah, I don't, I gotta I gotta go back to this.
Speaker 4:I know this is like, but if you're gonna bring it up, I'm gonna bring it up craig.
Speaker 1:I was very disturbed because well, I was kind of. It was kind of hating love. I love the fact that he was trying to nurse the, the bunny. You had it all up on your titty and you was petting it like it was your pet and this and that, and then Stephanie's like well, we gotta get rid of it. So you give it to Stephanie and after them petting that rabid rabbit, you commence to stick in your nasty-ass hands in the bags of fucking popcorn. It was my popcorn, we were all sharing it, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, nobody ate popcorn after that, I promise you.
Speaker 2:Well, there might have been a little bit of a. I did it on purpose, maybe. Remember the thought to it. No, I was actually stroking it, just like when I take a shit, I'd be stroking it. See, I wipe with my left hand always. I never wiped with, and that's not an Arabic thing or anything. I heard the Arabics do that.
Speaker 1:I've never heard that. Google it.
Speaker 2:Google it.
Speaker 1:Google that producer Arabics are known for wiping with their left hand, left hand Because?
Speaker 2:if they ever shake your left hand with the left hand, it's considered they hate you. It's a disgust. So if they ever greet you and you ever shake an Arabic's hand and they shake the left hand, punch him in the face. You ever shake an Arabic's hand and he shakes his left hand, punch him in the face. Wow, he might have forgotten.
Speaker 1:Would that be a?
Speaker 2:hate crime. No, I'm telling you, all you gotta do is say, hey, he fucking shook his hand with his shitty hand. But I believe it's true.
Speaker 3:Right, I'm pretty sure I've heard that I watched a YouTube video one time, so I think that's true. I'm not Googled.
Speaker 1:To be honest. Honest, it sounds about as crazy as the fucking shit I watch in the garage when I'm doing adult activities in the garage, like air guitar, national championships and shit.
Speaker 2:If you have not seen the air guitar championship, these are real people so a couple shows back.
Speaker 1:We talked about the pillow fighting championship. It's on the Ocho and they have several different.
Speaker 2:I have them all here, you want me to read.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So some of the physical skill component, including pop a shot, roller derby, cross, net bowling, quidditch you know what quidditch is? No, isn't that the game on, like Harry Potter.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Where they chase after the flying thing.
Speaker 1:Never seen Harry.
Speaker 2:Potter Trampoline dodgeball.
Speaker 1:That would be fun. I need to see that.
Speaker 2:Air hockey, okay, darts, cornhole, disc golf, kabaddi, omega ball, cheese or chest boxing and bed races. They also have ultimate fighting. I'm sorry ultimate tag, that's where you play tag with grown adults. Do all these obstacles. You seen it.
Speaker 1:Do they just run and touch each other? It's like parkour.
Speaker 3:It's amazing what they do. A dude will run up, Jump on a monkey bar, go through it and then slide under a cube While this other dude is just chasing them. They end up just getting in a huge circle and they're just going around like this Dude.
Speaker 2:they have slow motion replay Case. I just grazed you.
Speaker 3:Can you challenge the face oh?
Speaker 1:yeah, oh yeah, I'm done. I can't do it.
Speaker 2:Dude. The first time I seen that I was like does that say ultimate tag championship, the utc utc. This is a subscriber no, dude, I'm like they took something and it all during coven.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, these all developed, you know so the the the air guitar national championship was. I was in shock when I found out. So it was created in finland. Okay, but it was created in finland in 1996. Uh, the first ever winner was oh oiku yinlin that's probably the wrong name, I really don't care, but uh, from finland. And then in 2000s, it moved into the United Kingdom, 2003,. It came to the United States and it's been going on. The one we watched last week was the 2025 National Championship. Okay, and a young lady by the name of Mom Jeans won.
Speaker 2:Did she have a whole skit where she's cooking in a pot? Oh, yeah, yeah, oh yeah, I've seen her, yeah, and she's got all the steam coming out of it.
Speaker 1:She looked like she could be cute, but she's wearing the mom jeans. And then one yeah, I can see the potential and then there was one where she has the jeans on, but she rips them off and there's spandex underneath.
Speaker 3:Okay, what's that exact episode?
Speaker 1:It's the 2025 championship here. So let me just but what's that exact episode? It's the it's the 2025 championship episode, but like like here here. So let me just go through some of the winners, the past winners and 2024. It was Zach Ichabod fame.
Speaker 3:Okay, so like Ichabod crane, um never even heard that name and I'm just going to go.
Speaker 1:I'm just going to go in line for a couple of times. I'm not going to have to say the year, but Nanami Seven Seas, nagura.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Krill Guitar, aranchilla Blummin' Krants I had to say that really slow so they didn't have. They didn't have one in 2020 Because of COVID.
Speaker 2:Okay, I can see why.
Speaker 1:But what? Another one who's A multiple winner?
Speaker 4:is.
Speaker 1:Matt Aristotle Burns. Another one is kai kai real, your daddy blum, so he changes his name that kairil blum kratz. But uh, no man, they just they. They ones, alan the devil's niece, they just come up with these deals and and they, literally they just go if you haven't seen it, youtube it.
Speaker 2:They, literally they put on a show like they are playing see you watching the pillow fight and I would have never believed you until I googled it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh yeah I sent you video of me? Yeah, which is insane. Yeah, people actually pay, and there was. I didn't see you watching the pillow fight and I would have never believed you until I Googled it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, yeah, I sent you a video of me watching it, yeah, which is insane. Yeah, people actually paid and there was a crowd, they had followers.
Speaker 1:And the thing is it's like when they do those spinning pillow kicks, like the whole crowd's like, oh, it's like he just made a dunk or a three-pointer at the buzzer. A three-pointer at the buzzer, they get one of these. I've still never seen a knockout. I've watched a bunch of videos. I've never seen anybody get knocked out for the pillow fight.
Speaker 3:I've never seen the pillow fight.
Speaker 4:I need to catch up on that one.
Speaker 2:You're the YouTube king so you can watch that tonight. So you said you like to watch the slap competition.
Speaker 3:Yeah, whatever it's called the ultimate slap or whatever it's the most electrifying thing Tell me about it, me and my friends will get into an eight-man Discord call and we'll share the screen. Since none of us live near each other, we can't watch shows together, so we get on Discord and end up throwing the video on, and we're just livid, we're just hype as hell.
Speaker 1:See, we're all we got to get on that Discord and watch the show.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, you can watch shit, just throw it on there, share your screen.
Speaker 2:I thought you were going to get on the fucking show. I'm not getting slapped, I got a button.
Speaker 3:I actually have, me and my friends. We're going to throw in a thousand dollars for my man Xavier and my man Jordan to have one of those slap fights.
Speaker 2:Are they getting ready for this?
Speaker 3:I don't think they're they're not in training yet. Yeah, I don't think they're training per se.
Speaker 2:Well, if they need some training, they can come by. They don't mind us slapping them.
Speaker 3:Oh for sure, yeah, no, but every day they get on and they just talk about how they're going to one-slap each other. And so we were like all right? Well, let's actually put some money on this.
Speaker 2:What's one slap mean? Oh, like first round first slap, boom, you're done. First round, first slap, all done. So can you put like baby powder, like pimps do.
Speaker 3:I think that's what they do. So because whenever, especially while you're sweating, whenever the slap hits and there's water, it stings and everything like that, so they end up putting powder on their face. They have to put earplugs in so they don't get their ear popped. It's electrifying.
Speaker 1:I would definitely go to one of those Me and you.
Speaker 2:I want to do it with Stephanie.
Speaker 1:That's abuse for sure I do know about that one, because I'm a big follower of Paige Van Zandt. She's a 10. 10.
Speaker 2:Okay, 10. She's like 10 at slapping, or is she body banging 10? All of it.
Speaker 1:She's pretty good at slapping. Can you spell that name again, her name?
Speaker 4:is Paige.
Speaker 1:P-A-I-G-E.
Speaker 2:P-A-I-G-E. I'll just say Slap Rod.
Speaker 1:She used to be in the Ultimate Fighting. She stopped doing that. She was doing OnlyFans. She got rich off only fans. That's how hot she is. She's only yeah I wonder for how much she got a description.
Speaker 3:Yeah, she got rich.
Speaker 2:I've only I wonder, for a subscriber of each other's. You know she were maybe a follower. She may be a follower of mine oh, jimmy short dick oh jimmy short dick. If you don't know you, now you know you can find it on only fans exactly, I, exactly, I feel you. But so I mean what we got coming up April Fool's.
Speaker 1:Day, april Fool's Day Funny story that just happened literally before we started the show is I was like man, I should quit the show today and do a big April Fool's prank. Craig's like yeah, sounds pretty good, except tomorrow's April Fool's Day. I said, well, glad I didn't do that one good except tomorrow's april fool's day.
Speaker 2:So well, glad I didn't do that one, right, right, that'd have been a dumb ass. You know I didn't. I didn't prepare for the show and actually I just changed everything. To the producer, yeah, um, but she will start getting the emails. She's set it up. I do want you to know that. Uh, we have our own phone line, if so. So from now on, if you want to call and leave a message, you can call One second. Let me get to it, and it'll either take you to the show, it'll take you to the voicemail.
Speaker 1:Me. I'm a Jim Adler.
Speaker 2:No, no, let's see here.
Speaker 1:I like your hat though, by the way.
Speaker 2:What does it say?
Speaker 1:I thought there for a minute. I thought there for a minute.
Speaker 2:I thought it said Titleist, but it says Titties, we're a big proponent of we're a supporter of titties around here.
Speaker 3:We're male feminists.
Speaker 2:You want to call the number 903-224-5532 that you can get to us. I was going to let you hear what it said when you called it.
Speaker 4:Oh, never mind, we'll go there another time, yeah.
Speaker 2:But no, it gives you two options. It'll take you straight to her email address or our email address. It'll tell you how to get on the show and then, if you push two, it'll let you just leave a comment or a question that you want heard on the air. Once again. That number is 903-224-5532. Reach the shit shows, these shit shows, these shit shows.
Speaker 3:These shit shows.
Speaker 2:So we don't have no emails. You want to at least play the email song? Yeah we'll sing along to it, have you heard my email song?
Speaker 3:No, I haven't. I'll get ready to clap.
Speaker 1:Let's go the Grammy award winning shit shows 2024 let's go. This is the coolest part Of the show, where we read your emails on the low, but the best part Is hearing me flow. So let's get to this shit, bro.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's pretty good.
Speaker 3:I think that's going to pay the bills. I think we'll get it done. We've got $80 so far.
Speaker 2:So, once again, that number is 903-224-5532. It's a direct line to our answering service. Like I said, it gives you a couple options of what you want to do.
Speaker 1:Sounds kind of weird. Our answering service 903-224-5532.
Speaker 3:Are we?
Speaker 2:going to go to their house after they call us or something. Well, there is a button, you leave your contact information. And if you want to leave your contact, Page Manzan, if you're out there. We would love to do it at your place, that's.
Speaker 3:Apple Watch.
Speaker 2:It's just got a different band on it my wife upgraded me because I keep breaking them, so she got me the indestructible one.
Speaker 1:Craig upgraded the backyard too. Really, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Let me go ahead and hear this one. We'll talk about it off air, for sure.
Speaker 1:So instead of the email segment, today we wanted to bless our wonderful producer. She come up with a little questionnaire. We've been doing the last couple weeks of little questions, little nutty questions that I've enjoyed. Hopefully y'all have enjoyed it. So she wanted to do that, so we're going to let her have a couple of minutes on the show here.
Speaker 4:All right, thank you. So just to follow up from last week we talked about how fun it would be to just follow up on the snails, so I've got a few fun facts for just the snails.
Speaker 1:Okay, so just so we're going to all three are going to try to answer these and see if we can get them right.
Speaker 4:Sure, you can throw out a guess. I don't know that you'll necessarily get them All right. So for the first one, how many teeth do you think snails have?
Speaker 1:Dre, you go first and I'm going to say shoot high. Shoot high.
Speaker 4:Yes, very high.
Speaker 3:I mean 32. I would have said zero if she didn't say that.
Speaker 2:I might have. I'm going to guess 10,000.
Speaker 1:I'm going to guess 10,000. I'm going to say 54.
Speaker 4:So Craig wins. But it says he cheated.
Speaker 3:He definitely just looked that up he definitely did.
Speaker 1:There's no way, you guessed 10,000. What was?
Speaker 4:the number. So it says around 14,000 and some Hold on and some species have 20,000.
Speaker 2:See, if I was going to cheat, I would have gave the right answer. No, you just had to get close.
Speaker 1:We were under 100. That's insane, though Well, I would say, I like to win. Somebody take his phone away.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I couldn't even imagine.
Speaker 2:They're all microscopic though they are. That's what I'm saying they are. This is like diamond, you know, like sandpaper. I, I couldn't even imagine. They're all microscopic though they are. That's what I'm saying they are. This is like diamond, you know, like sandpaper.
Speaker 3:I imagine Okay, yeah, I guess that makes sense.
Speaker 4:I think we alluded to this one on the last one, but I'll go ahead and put it how long do snails live Until you put salt on them. Yeah, facts.
Speaker 3:I felt like a maniac for a couple years, because every time I saw a snail I had to pour salt on it. I do apologize.
Speaker 1:How long do you think they live?
Speaker 3:Dre, we'll say Seven years.
Speaker 2:I'm going to say ten.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say six months.
Speaker 4:Okay, so Dre wins that one. It says between two and five years In the wild. Some species can live up to 10 years in captivity.
Speaker 3:Can you just give us a quick? What's the biggest snail ever found?
Speaker 4:I don't think I looked up that one.
Speaker 3:Now I'm curious.
Speaker 4:Right, right right.
Speaker 2:So I mean snails. They grow so slow right Exactly. They move slow, so we were going to do a whole show about snails.
Speaker 1:In slow-mo you couldn't talk that slow for a whole show. No For sure.
Speaker 2:What else you?
Speaker 4:got Okay, so it says are they okay to touch?
Speaker 2:Yes. Yeah they're okay.
Speaker 1:They're just slimy. But as soon as you touch them they probably snarl back in their snail shell you eat them all the time. I do not you know I do no, sir what do you think escargot is?
Speaker 4:I don't need escargot well, so I guess that's a yes and no. I mean, boys will be boys, they'll play with bugs, put them in their mouth, whatever. But it actually they say that they um harbor parasites and because of this you should not only wash your hands before handling them to protect them, but wash your hands afterwards to protect yourself. You should never kiss a snail or allow your children to put them in their mouths.
Speaker 2:Well, you're allowed to eat them.
Speaker 4:After they've been cooked, maybe after they have salt on them, I don't know, and then I think there's no. I got a couple more alright. So how many years do they sleep?
Speaker 2:oh, I think I know this one go ahead there Dre so hold on, hold on.
Speaker 1:Before I answer this question, I have a question. What do you mean? How many years do they sleep Like they sleep more than they're awake? So is this like an amount of?
Speaker 3:time, if they're alive for five years we're guessing like, yeah, give us a hint real quick, because are you assuming like I feel like you said as humans. We sleep half of our life almost, or a quarter.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you make a multiple choice.
Speaker 3:Yeah, this is multiple here.
Speaker 1:Well, I, yeah, this is multiple here, uh well, I mean like bears hibernate, so so snails kind of hibernate too if you will okay, so how long do they sleep in their lives, in their lifetime, or like in a year or?
Speaker 3:yeah, in their lifetime in their lifetime uh said two to five years, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say four years I think it's three yeah, I'll probably say three and a half.
Speaker 4:Okay, it does say that they can remain in that state for up to three years.
Speaker 2:Look at that.
Speaker 3:I had the answer right the other way. It's such a cheater Fucking crazy.
Speaker 2:It's here somewhere.
Speaker 4:All right.
Speaker 2:How are they born? Oh, that's an interesting question. I mean, it's not like you see a snail on her back and her legs or tail spread apart and one pops out.
Speaker 3:I don't. I would assume eggs.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I would say eggs.
Speaker 1:It's a larva. It's a larva, so it has to be an egg.
Speaker 4:Ding, ding ding. Y'all got it. She's like a maggot right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, grows into itself. Ugh, maggot, ugh.
Speaker 4:Okay, like a maggot, right yeah, grows into itself Maggot.
Speaker 1:Okay don't do that Okay. I got a question for you about a snail. How long into a song does it take for you to get a snail trail on your thigh at a strip club?
Speaker 3:there's only one answer here depends.
Speaker 2:I seen a guy do it in less than one lap dance. Yeah, what was your experience?
Speaker 1:like I didn't even know till I was yours.
Speaker 2:I didn't know it was me I was talking about.
Speaker 1:It was his and I was working. I just went there for lunch. It was, they had just opened up. It's when pts opened up, they're all nude and we went there for lunch.
Speaker 1:I was, I was working uh, it was sponsors there by the way it was, it was for work and of course, we had lunch and had a lap dance and I had to go back to work afterwards. So I'm walking to my company truck after leaving the fucking strip club and I looked down at my black slacks and it looked like I just wiped my nose and wiped it on my leg. That's disgusting.
Speaker 2:Well, I took a kid there when he was 18. I'm not going to lie.
Speaker 1:I probably scratched and sniffed it, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:It wasn't my kid. He's got a workforce. Never been to a strip club, he's a virgin.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:I took a wad of cash out. We walked into Take care of this boy. Two songs in, he's coming out and he's like oh, I come all over myself. I'm like oh, who's? This His name is Travis Langen and he listens to the show. So, Travis, that's a shout-out to you, buddy.
Speaker 3:Tito Shout-out, travis Shout-out.
Speaker 2:Travis, you remember your first WOD shot.
Speaker 1:Bust it wide open. Bust it, bust it wide two grand that night, jesus. Well, that's a Craig can't go to strip clubs. Craig last time I went to a strip club with Craig he tried to buy me a lap dance and I had to almost got into a fight with the stripper saying get off me, I don't want this lap dance.
Speaker 2:He's drinking water.
Speaker 1:I was gone.
Speaker 3:I went to a strip club one time and it was on some random Tuesday night.
Speaker 2:We were like the only people there.
Speaker 3:There was a couple people that were on the outside just kind of standing there dancing to the music. We were like the only people that had any of the girls next to us.
Speaker 2:I like Wednesdays.
Speaker 1:You go in there Thursday, friday, saturday, it's like everybody and their mama goes. You got all the gangsters, all the wannabe gangsters.
Speaker 2:You go on a Tuesday, wednesday, you own the fucking place. It was about 500 bucks, that's what it felt like.
Speaker 3:I mean, the girls were so bored that we stopped paying for dances. They were just sitting next to us. We were just talking about shit.
Speaker 2:I walk in and I put a.
Speaker 3:What are we doing tomorrow night?
Speaker 2:I'm giving my secret to it. But I and I find a round table and I just start grabbing chairs and before you know it, we have the entire club sitting with us.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:And all these guys are like because there's nobody dancing with us, and they're like come to the stage. We have Stephanie.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's a big crew. Yeah, she is a big crew Fuck off, so so. So now let's get a little spin off on something. Okay, tornadoes, let's tornado watch. So that was the number one thing Googled. Well, over 500,000 times it was Googled in the last 24 hours.
Speaker 1:Wow, is this tornado weather in some part of like? Why would so many people?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, we had several tornado warnings. We thought we were gonna get hit with it, but yeah, it is.
Speaker 1:It is that type of year okay, because like hurricane season and shit like that.
Speaker 2:So and there was. There was, there was supposed to be a big one and it went right above, you know, over us, yep, um, but that many people was googling tornadoes. I remember my first tornado not that I was in, but I could see it it. You know, I think I was eight and me and my mom and my dad were sitting there on the front porch watching this thing, develop.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, it was here in Texas and my brother is so scared. He's scared of tornadoes, but he hates snakes and I've chased him with worms because he don't like the way they feel. You should have told me that he, oh bro, he is terrified of them, so I got a story about that too. We he's in the bathtub freaking out. We're sitting on the porch watch it come down and you know I was like that's cool as shit. You know, of course, if it ever turned towards, my dad would you know, might just take cover, but yeah you know, everybody's witnessed a tornado or not not witnessed it, but at least seen one so.
Speaker 1:So for me, I've never I don't know that I've ever witnessed like seen one, seen one, um, but the one that hit several years ago we were involved in that because we had dropped, I think, devon and his little girlfriend off at the mall and we went across the street to eat at Chipotle. Well, we were in the middle of eating and we knew it was going to storm.
Speaker 4:But we live in Texas.
Speaker 1:It storms all the time there's always that threat. Everybody. You know new people to Texas. They start talking about hell, so they start pulling their cars in it's like we know when it's going to hail and it rarely does Not that it's going to damage that bad, at least where we're at, anyway. So we're at Chipotle and Devin calls and he goes hey, can you guys come get us?
Speaker 1:They put everybody in the basement, can you come get us? So we're like, okay, so we go get Devin, and then before we could even make it home, so the original plan was to take them to the movie theater.
Speaker 2:That was off of 80 and was it Beltline, beltline, the dollar movie.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so the tornado ended up going on that path. I don't think it tore up the movie theater, but it went right by there.
Speaker 2:Is that the one that tore up Garland as?
Speaker 1:well, yeah, that's the one that tore up Rowlett and Garland all those apartments right there.
Speaker 4:Ten years ago roughly Somewhere around there.
Speaker 1:But, like I said, but it was so funny because before we could get home we didn't even know that our brother had been affected. You know, he was literally four blocks over. It just missed him. If you leave his house and go four blocks down the road, that tornado just wiped the water tower down and everything.
Speaker 2:That's crazy man and you could see the water tower from him. The damage that those things can do.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:You know, it's Mother Nature. It's no joke, Water, wind and fire will destroy anything.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, that's why I watched that I like, so I like Twister, the first one. The second one was garbage.
Speaker 2:But there's no way on.
Speaker 1:God's green earth that I could do that be a storm chaser.
Speaker 2:Have you seen the new documentary called Twister on Netflix?
Speaker 1:No, no, I have it on my list, bro bro, it's fucking intense.
Speaker 2:It takes this guy and rips him out of the car. It shows it he lives Shit.
Speaker 3:I saw a video of it was these two storm chasers. One car was like they're going up a highway, and then there was one right in the back and the one that was just far ahead got completely swallowed up by a tornado. They have no idea where the car is.
Speaker 2:the body is everything like that dude, because it snatches you, oh yeah then he just completely disappeared that's crazy, would you okay? I got one. I know we don't have much time to show, but would you rather be in a tornado, hurricane or a wildfire?
Speaker 1:so if I could be, if I had a storm, shelter or a basement, I would rather be in a tornado well, I mean yeah, yeah let's let's get a basement.
Speaker 3:I would rather be in a tornado. Well, I mean, yeah, yeah, let's get a little more back. So are we inside a house? Are we just outside Out and about Out in the wild? Yes, just out in the wild.
Speaker 2:You're either trapped in a forest, say you're in a forest, forest catches fire, or a tornado comes, or a hurricane comes. Which one would you rather?
Speaker 1:be stuck in man, hurricane, I think, a tornado I feel like I couldn't strap my belt to the tree and like, hold on to this hurricane versus tornadoes gonna take.
Speaker 2:I think I could outrun tornado shit, the fuck up, yeah come on now see now yeah, I, probably.
Speaker 3:I, I would love to say wildfire, but you'll excuse me, but that's on. No, it's definitely red, it's just red everywhere. Nothing but panic. I, I don't, I'd probably say hurricane. I've never been in a hurricane. Excuse me, but that's on. No, it's definitely red, it's just red everywhere, nothing but panic, I don't, I'd probably say hurricane.
Speaker 1:I've never been in a hurricane, though, so I don't know how bad it would be. Did you see that one video I want to say it was here in Texas of somebody had their home and they still had, like their ring camera on.
Speaker 3:And it showed the time lapse of when the storm came, and engulfed their house and the sounds that it makes the eerie sounds.
Speaker 2:I think I can see a tornado Bitch. You can't read.
Speaker 1:How you gonna see a tornado. You got reading glasses. I saw them the other day. By the way, I hadn't seen them yet until Saturday.
Speaker 2:Well, I can read. It's small print. I can't read.
Speaker 1:You reading enough to cheat like you did earlier.
Speaker 2:I can't read you reading up the cheat like you did earlier. On that end, I can read it, there's no problem.
Speaker 3:If it's a super, super big tornado, there's no way you're outrunning it. It moves way faster than you think.
Speaker 2:I know, but I can see it coming.
Speaker 3:I think I can get away with it. But I'm saying, if it's coming towards you, it's going to get you.
Speaker 2:I'll hug a tree like a mother.
Speaker 1:From a tornado. The tree is going to rip the tree up, but the problem with hurricane.
Speaker 2:Hurricane, the wind is going to take shit and throw it on you.
Speaker 1:So is tornado. Tornado is going to take shit and throw it up. Okay.
Speaker 3:Maybe, yeah, I don't know. I think probably your best bet is hurricane.
Speaker 2:I think we'd die from all of them, but I think I could. Yeah, it's going to be tough for sure I think you know I'd be like Dorothy you never know where you're going to wake up.
Speaker 3:I think with a wildfire, if I was at least 10 minutes, I knew where I was in the forest and I knew I had at least 10 minutes to get back to being out of the fire I think I could survive a wildfire.
Speaker 2:And it's just wildfires. They go so quick.
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 1:Well, I hope nobody has to endure that. Well, yeah, anybody out there that?
Speaker 2:had any damage done from the tornadoes, reach out to us and we'll give you an attaboy for making it out of it.
Speaker 1:We appreciate you, drake. Thanks for being on. I enjoyed it. Glad to be here, you're my favorite guest so far.
Speaker 3:Hopefully I'm other favorites as well.
Speaker 1:Yes, you're going to be like.
Speaker 2:I want that hot dude back, Shut the fuck up. So if you're trying to get a hold of us, that number, what's that number?
Speaker 4:903-224-5532.
Speaker 2:You're trying to get a hold of Dre, you can hit it up. We can put you in contact with him.
Speaker 3:We'll put you in contact, my mother bro.
Speaker 2:All right, peace out.
