Uniquely You: Enneagram + Real Life
Welcome to Uniquely You: Enneagram + Real Life — a podcast that brings personality wisdom into everyday moments. Hosted by life and relationship coach Wendy Busby, each episode offers honest conversations, real-life stories, and practical tips for your everyday life. Whether you're new to the Enneagram or deep in your growth journey, this space invites you to explore who you are, how you relate, and what it means to live with more clarity, compassion, and confidence. Tune in, share with a friend, and keep becoming Uniquely You.
Uniquely You: Enneagram + Real Life
Embracing Your Seasons of Stuckness
Have you ever felt completely stuck in life, like you're trapped in a cycle with no way out? That overwhelming sense of stagnation where nothing seems to move forward despite your best efforts? You're not alone—and there's profound wisdom waiting in that uncomfortable space.
Feeling stuck is universally human, yet we rarely talk about it honestly. We live in a culture that celebrates constant motion, achievement, and productivity, making the experience of stagnation feel like personal failure. But what if being stuck isn't a problem to solve but a signal to heed? What if it's life's way of inviting you into necessary change?
This episode unpacks what being stuck really feels like—the confusion, frustration, fear, and self-doubt that often accompany it—while offering a compassionate framework for moving through it with intention. We explore why clarity doesn't come from doing more but from stepping back to reflect and recalibrate. You'll discover the essential ingredients for navigating stuck seasons: self-compassion, trusted support from others, small but meaningful actions, and perhaps most challenging of all, patience.
Whether you're experiencing professional stagnation, emotional blockage, or spiritual drought, this conversation offers practical tools like journaling, changing your environment, and taking tiny steps forward. Remember, being stuck is temporary—just one season in your journey. You are uniquely you and worthy of all the growth, progress, and possibilities that lie ahead, however slowly they might reveal themselves.
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Welcome to Uniquely you, where we dive into personal growth, relationships and the journey towards living fully. I'm your host, wendy Busby, and today's episode is all about a feeling we all encounter at some point, and that's being stuck. It's that overwhelming sense of stagnation where nothing seems to be moving forward. So if you have ever found yourself in that place, today's episode is for you. There have been times in my life when I've been really stuck stuck professionally, emotionally and spiritually. I felt trapped in a cycle and, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get out of it. I didn't know how long it would all last. It was discouraging and frustrating and it perpetuated the internal deficiency story that I struggle with. And, to be honest, I've been feeling a little stuck lately and I'm noticing some of these old stories showing up. So I thought, well, I'll just get on here and talk about it, and talk about what happens when we feel stuck, why it feels so uncomfortable and, most importantly, what we truly need in seasons of stuckness. What we truly need in seasons of stuckness, because, guess what, being stuck is not a sign of failure, it's a signal. It's a signal that something in your life needs attention, something needs to reset. It's okay not to be okay right now. So let's just talk about it and thank you for listening. I hope that you feel seen and understood today.
Speaker 1:But before we dive into the doing, into the trying to get unstuck or trying to find solution, let's first talk about what it feels like to be stuck. For some of us it may show up as confusion or overwhelm. We find ourselves in a cycle of overthinking where we can't seem to get clarity. For others it might be frustration. We know that something needs to change, but we just don't know what that change looks like. It could also show up as fear. We are afraid we'll never get out of this stuck place. For me, it shows up as a sluggish feeling where I feel unmotivated and tired and I also have a lot of self-doubt in those seasons, in the season of being stuck.
Speaker 1:Being stuck, it might not even be obvious. Sometimes it's so subtle that we might not even realize that we're stuck because we're operating on autopilot. We're going through the motions of our day, we go to work, we show up where we're supposed to show up, we give to the people that we love, we're taking care of the things we need to take care of, but something inside isn't right and we sense it, but it might be so subtle that we can't seem to pinpoint what is wrong. We just know something is off. We feel stuck off, we feel stuck, and when we're stuck it can feel like failing, like we're failing, like there's something just inherently wrong with this, like why can't I get it right? We start questioning our abilities, our worth, our choices and, let's be real, those feelings can be exhausting. But here's the truth Feeling stuck is part of the human experience.
Speaker 1:It's something most people face at some point or another in life. It's also something we have a hard time admitting Because somewhere along the way we were told we shouldn't, we shouldn't feel stuck, we should be able to just get it all done. And we live in a culture that promotes goals. Now, there's nothing wrong with goals I'm not saying that but we live in a culture that promotes goals and promotes action, promotes busyness, promotes doing, and if you're not working towards a goal, if you're not busy all the time, then there must be something wrong with you. That's what culture tells us.
Speaker 1:So it's hard to admit when we feel stuck and so many people just try to push through and keep going, when everything within them is saying slow down, slow down, I'm not doing okay. It's in these moments. It's in these moments that life is inviting you into change, and I know that that might feel like it's the opposite, like those two things can't go together. When you feel off, when you feel stuck, slow down. Maybe, just maybe, you can see how life is inviting you in to change into a new season, because times of transition often begin with a season of feeling stuck or feeling unsure, and it's so hard to see it while it's happening, or feeling unsure, and it's so hard to see it while it's happening. So my encouragement to you today if you, like me, are feeling a bit stuck, let this be an invitation, an invitation to slow down and inquire about what might be next for you, because this stuck feeling that you're having, the stuck feeling that I'm having, it's not a permanent state, it's a season and, like all seasons, it eventually will pass.
Speaker 1:So if being stuck, this human condition, is something that we all face at some point or another in life, then some of the obvious questions to ask are what do we need when we're in that space? How can we move through it, what do we need and who do we need? So I'm going to share with you what I have learned, both from my own experiences of being stuck and coming through those stuck seasons, getting into a stuck season again. I mean, I don't even know how many times I have found myself going through seasons where I feel stuck and then I come out of it and things are working and things are going well, and then I find myself stuck again. It's okay. So I'm just going to share with you what I've learned, both from my own experience and in my work with people, because it's such a common experience. So let's do this.
Speaker 1:So, first and foremost, when you are in a stuck season, when we are in stuck seasons season, when we are in stuck seasons, we need compassion. We need to be compassionate with ourselves. You know, all that compassion that you give to others, that is what you need to give yourself. In a stuck season, we can have a lot of self-criticism. We tell ourselves that we should be doing better, that we should have it all figured out. We shouldn't be stuck. We shouldn't be stuck at all. So what's wrong? What's wrong with me that I'm stuck? But the truth is being stuck.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say this again being stuck just means you're in a season and life is offering you an invitation to reflect and then to recalibrate, sometimes going through that process over and over and over again until you find your new footing. So showing yourself kindness through this process and allowing yourself to feel whatever you're feeling without judging yourself, that is compassion. You're going to feel lots of things and it's okay. So this is the first step in getting unstuck. It's being compassionate, it's acknowledging where you are, without trying to rush through it, without trying to suppress it or pretend like it's not there, being gentle with yourself.
Speaker 1:And next, we need some clarity, because when we're stuck, everything can feel a bit cloudy, a bit hazy, not really sure where we're at. But here's the thing Clarity doesn't come from doing more. It doesn't come from doing more overthinking. It comes from stepping back. Remember, reflect and recalibrate, reflect and recalibrate. So reflecting, what does that mean? Asking yourself questions like what's really going on here? What do I really need right now? What's holding me back in this moment?
Speaker 1:Sometimes just taking a second or a few or a few minutes to sit in silence or, to, you know, spend some time with your journal or get outside and take a walk, can really help you gain the clarity you need Slowing down and reflecting. What that does is that it gives us space to connect with our own inner wisdom. You have so much wisdom inside of you, but it's often suppressed. It's often there's too much noise that we can't even hear it. That's why it's so important to slow down and to reflect, and we also need support from others. We can think that we need to just handle it all on our own. We can think that we need to just handle it all on our own. We need support, whether it's a trusted friend, a family member, a coach, someone with whom you, someone that can help you see things from a different perspective.
Speaker 1:It's important that we're vulnerable with someone who will listen without judging us, and that can be incredibly freeing when we finally just say the things that we're afraid to say with someone that we can trust, someone we know is going to have our back, someone we know isn't going to go tell someone else. That's one of the biggest reasons why we don't talk to other people about what's really going on with us is because we're not sure what they're going to do with that information. So make sure it's someone who is really trustworthy. Find a good therapist. Find a good coach, find a faithful friend who can walk with you when you're stuck. That external perspective might be exactly what you need. It might be exactly what you need to kind of break through the fog that's going on. So ask yourself who are the people in your life that can offer you support. Who is that trustworthy person that's going to be gentle with you when you need it but also is willing to be truthful? Because sometimes saying the hard things is what we need to hear, but when it's done by someone that we trust, someone that we know loves us, that's different than someone who just blurts out something and it feels like judgment or it feels in our defenses come up. So who in your life can you trust? Who is that safe person?
Speaker 1:And another thing we need is action. Now don't hear me wrong. I don't mean a bunch of doing. I don't mean that, and I don't mean rushing into a decision just to feel productive. It's about small actions that slowly create momentum. When we're stuck, it can feel like we're not moving at all, but taking even the smallest step like making a phone call, sending an email, creating something, writing down your ideas that can start to break the cycle. There's something about creating that helps with forward motion. And I don't mean that you have to be artistic or anything like that. We're creating things all the time.
Speaker 1:So where in your life can you get into that creating, into that generative place where you're making something? Sometimes it's just even the smallest thing. Maybe you're like I'm beyond stuck, I'm having a hard time getting out of bed because I don't know where I am in life, what I'm doing, where everything just feels like incredibly hard. Sometimes the action that's needed is simply just putting your feet on the floor, and if that's all you've got for the day is to put both feet on the floor for however long you can do, that, it's okay, Because maybe the next day, when you put your feet on the floor, maybe you can stand up, maybe you can take a few steps. This is where compassion for yourself is so incredibly important. So even if it's just a small action each day, it's just a small action each day, it is so helpful. You don't have to have some big, gigantic goal or I'm going to accomplish these five things today to try to force yourself out of this place that you're in Just something small every day.
Speaker 1:And finally, what we need is patience, and this might be the hardest one, because we don't like it. We don't like the uncomfortable feeling of being stuck. We want to get away from it. We want to result quickly, but sometimes the best thing we can do is just to sit with it, to give ourselves grace, to wait for the clarity or the insight to come. Not every season that we're in is meant to be rushed. Sometimes the best growth happens in seasons of waiting and in seasons of wondering. So, to recap so far where we've gone and to just, you know, give you some of the I don't know more practical things. I mean, those are all very practical, but sometimes what people want is like just give me the to-do list, just give me something that I can focus on. So here's a couple of practical things that you can do during this season Journaling I know some people are like I don't like journaling.
Speaker 1:Look, you don't have to make this a lifelong practice. You don't even have to call it journaling. You can call it making a list. You can call it writing down your thoughts and feelings. You can call it whatever you want. Get a notebook, get a journal or get a piece of paper from your copier. It doesn't have to be some fancy journal or anything like that, but just write down your thoughts, get your thoughts out of your head and onto the paper. There's something about this somatic exercise of actually writing with pen and paper to release some of the things that have been stuck, some of the things that we've been holding onto, and when people do this, they're often surprised at what clarity comes from that. So give it a try. You don't have to keep doing it.
Speaker 1:Once you feel like you have passed through this season, put the journal away it doesn't have to become a lifelong practice and take a break. Step away from the situation. Get out of the actual physical place that you're in. If you're stuck at home, feeling stuck, get out. Get outside, take a trip if you can. We need a change of scenery. We need something to capture our attention, and what that does is that stimulates creativity.
Speaker 1:So when we take a break from the stuck routine that we find ourselves in, we're often surprised at how just that little gift that we've given ourselves can sometimes be just the thing that we need. For me, I love the beach. Sadly, I live three hours away from it, so it's not someplace I can get to very often, but sometimes I will just take a long drive and take a long walk on the beach and drive that long way back, because it does such wonders for my soul. It's the smell of the air, the sound of the waves, the vastness of the water. There's something about it that just makes me feel alive and through that, often, solutions start to arise for me. I get clarity, I feel connected and loved when I'm giving myself that gift of just getting out and getting myself to the beach. So take one tiny step in the direction that you want to go, just one. That's part of the recalibration. So we're reflecting and we're recalibrating, and we might need to do that over and over and over again. Just taking these tiny steps and patience. Remember, it's about patience, because being stuck is temporary. Trust the process and allow things to unfold at their own pace Well.
Speaker 1:So, as I wrap up today's episode, I want to leave you with this If you're feeling stuck right now, please don't beat yourself up. You are not alone. Every single person has been there. It is a part of a journey. It's just a part. It's not the whole thing and it's not a permanent state. You are you. You are uniquely you and you deserve to be seen and heard and understood.
Speaker 1:There is no one size fits all antidote here, so what you may need what you may need in this season of stuck may be different than what I need or than your friend needs. So these are just the things that have helped me and I hope that in some way they've helped you. So take what you feel like will work for you. You don't have to do all of it, but I'm here. I'm here to listen, I'm here to help you find your way. So please reach out. I'd love to support you on your journey. So thank you for joining me today. Thank you for listening to this podcast episode. I hope that you found it helpful. I really appreciate it if you would subscribe and even leave a review. That's helpful. So take care and remember that you are uniquely you. You are worthy of growth, progress and all the possibilities that lie ahead. Thank you.