Anne Levine Show
Funny, weekly, sugar free: Starring "Michael-over-there."
Anne Levine Show
25 Dogs Walk Into A Show
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Start with a box from Zabar’s and a first-night menorah, add baharat on roasted carrots, and you’ve got more than a menu—you’ve got a map of how small rituals keep us steady when the world tilts. We go from the warmth of latkes and the surprisingly crucial argument for chunky applesauce to the unpretty details of hand surgery: arthritis that eats, sutures that hold, and the relief of finally shedding a cast on your dominant hand. It’s care work, with jokes and a plan.
The coastline pulls us outside. We sit with the ache of right whales caught in gear and remember a morning at Race Point where blowholes stitched the horizon—proof that wonder still meets those who show up early and look long. Then a rare win: authorities break the largest wildlife trafficking ring on record, freeing over 30,000 animals and moving them into rehab and protected habitats. Systems aligned, laws worked, lives were saved. That’s not a headline; it’s a blueprint for hope.
We play with a provocative thought: what if social media went dark for six months? Not as an outage, but as a reset. That opens a door to analog nostalgia—maps, landlines, city clocks you can read at a glance—and a conversation about skills kids aren’t getting, from cursive to telling time. We wander into algebra and the oddly joyful logic of Boolean math, then pivot to a shelter volunteer who puts overlooked dogs in a backpack, walks into a coffee shop, and walks out with an adoption. No campaign. Just proximity. It’s the kind of simple, brave idea that scales hearts faster than budgets.
The hour ends heavy and honest as we name the week’s tragedies and hold space for grief. Ritual answers with light. If this resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who needs a grounded listen, and leave a review to help others find us. And tonight, for those we lost and those still healing, put a light on.
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I want to know if you've ever eaten in a restaurant in Port Angel.
SPEAKER_01:I don't believe so. I've driven to several times. Meanwhile, ten years later, my face, the daughter of my sister, is getting married.
SPEAKER_00:The Anne Levine Show. If you're not listening, you need to be listening. I love this.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, Mr. Engineer.
SPEAKER_01:You guessed right. It's time for the Anne Levine Show.
SPEAKER_04:This is today, and everything else is yesterday's mashed potatoes.
SPEAKER_01:W O M R ninety-two point one FM Province Town.
SPEAKER_00:And that over there is Michael.
SPEAKER_04:Always right. Of Michael over there.
SPEAKER_01:Hello.
SPEAKER_04:And the wonderful Hanukkah stylings of depeche mode. Well, exactly. You know that this band still sells out arenas.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I I believe that.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. I mean, they're like unstoppable. They have a new album out. Good for them. But I haven't heard it yet. I know. Shocked to hear it.
SPEAKER_01:I think when they started, they were all like in their uh early early teens anyway. At least if you go back and look at like at one of these videos, like this one, I think what is it? 80 early 80s.
SPEAKER_04:80.
SPEAKER_01:Right? I think this song came out in 1980. You know, so they're they're just little babies, it looks like so. Yeah, they're probably still out there just going real strong.
SPEAKER_04:They were like 18 or 19 when this song came out.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think that must have been pretty good. Yeah. Glad they're still doing it.
SPEAKER_04:Well, I had no idea how many albums they've sold. I mean, they just sold out Madison Square Garden recently.
SPEAKER_01:Right on.
SPEAKER_04:Which is great, but I find it shocking.
SPEAKER_01:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_04:You know, if you said what's Depeche Mode up to, to me.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. I wouldn't have Madison Square Garden touring arenas. Right, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:They're doing the Rose Bowl.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, good for them.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. They're doing everything. Alright. Uh, people who are doing well. Gotta love that.
SPEAKER_01:There are some of those people out there.
SPEAKER_04:Yes, there are some of them. Some of them aren't, but anyway.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Well, we had our first night of Hanukkah.
SPEAKER_01:Yes.
SPEAKER_04:On Sunday night.
SPEAKER_01:Yep.
SPEAKER_04:And uh our cousin Ann Calter and her husband Mitch. Anna Mitch Calter. Yep. Um sent us from Zabars the most fabulous, like, Hanukkah delight.
SPEAKER_01:Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Um, we got latkas, linzes, and a babka. And a babka.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And applesauce.
SPEAKER_01:Right. And sour cream. Sour cream.
SPEAKER_04:Thank you.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that was awesome.
SPEAKER_04:It was awesome. Um, and I had roasted some vegetables.
SPEAKER_01:Right. Also awesome.
SPEAKER_04:Which we pretended to like.
SPEAKER_01:Oh no, they were very good. Come on. No, no, no. You just got a whole like uh 47 packages worth of really exotic spices. That could have all come in one box. But anyway, so you've been having a lot of fun with that. I sure have. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I sure have. I've been cooking around.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:So um They're pretty great. Yeah, I made one bah, um, which was the carrots.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:With baharat and cilan.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, one of my favorite uh things. You know, um what do you call it? Spice blends. Bahara. Right. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And then I made rasal chanu uh squash with zucchini. Um with a little latkas and applesauce and sour cream.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that was perfect.
SPEAKER_04:The best applesauce ever.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I mean, and uh I mean, it was pretty good, but you know.
SPEAKER_04:Okay, I I'm saying I dare you to send me applesauce that I'm gonna like more. I'm just saying.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, okay. Well, I mean, I c I can make you applesauce you'll like more.
SPEAKER_04:I know.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I've I've done it many, many times. Well, it's got to I don't have to I don't have to prove something I'm over I've already proven.
SPEAKER_04:It has to be chunky.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that is true.
SPEAKER_04:Skin on.
SPEAKER_01:Yep.
SPEAKER_04:That is the best way to do it. It's just so darn good. Yeah. Anyway, first night of holly.
SPEAKER_01:And I use a mix of different kinds of apples. Tarte and sweeter apples.
SPEAKER_04:I see.
SPEAKER_01:Because it you know, it gives it a little something more.
SPEAKER_04:Well, give it a roll.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Give it a roll. So you're looking at getting your cast off today.
SPEAKER_01:Later today. Later today, yeah. Well Which is one of the reasons why we weren't here last week, folks, because I was uh overly stoned.
SPEAKER_04:Um Well, I would say stoned isn't quite the right word.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Well, certainly um pain medicated.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. Michael had surgery on his hand. Do we did we talk about that?
SPEAKER_01:Uh I don't know. Did we? Uh I don't think so. Uh they took a bone out of my thumb and and uh then hooked my thumb back up to a different spot. And um it's gonna be all good here pretty co pretty soon. So that'll be great. And that's because of arthritis, right? Yeah. It's eaten away at the bones. So So they're taking away the eaten bone and then just eaten bone. Right. One that is supposed to keep your thumb in place. Mm-hmm. But it's not doing it anymore because it's be been eaten away. So there's nothing there. Right. And so now that they're they have uh used what they call a falcon suspension or falcon clutch suspension. That's so. Which is a little sling they put on the bone and they wrap it up around another bone, and then they kind of like tighten it in place with like little buttons and stuff that kind of you know keep the tension right in the right place. Uh-huh. Uh until they get it where they want it to be, and then they sew it all up. And save it.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, so you've so you've got more to go here?
SPEAKER_01:No, no, no, no. Uh as far as the recovery, no, I'm all um Oh, you mean they tighten it all up? They've already all done that. Yeah, that was part of the original surgery. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:Well Yeah, they're like, okay, you know, oh all right, let's put that size in the, you know, put that in there. D is it lined up the right way? Yeah, okay, but we need to do a suture here to tighten it up a little bit. There's a lot Yeah. I thought you were saying it up exactly right, you know, otherwise it's not gonna work good.
SPEAKER_04:So Yeah. I thought you were saying you had to go back in and they had to tighten up some.
SPEAKER_01:Oh no, no, no. Oh, thank god.
SPEAKER_04:Like they had to tighten your shoelaces or something. No. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I don't want to do that.
SPEAKER_04:That's what it's happening.
SPEAKER_01:No, tomorrow, but this this cast comes off and then I get a uh you know, a velcro thing that I will wear probably a you know, most of the time, but I don't have to.
SPEAKER_04:Sounds good.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so I'm very happy about that. Because it is on my dominant hand.
SPEAKER_04:That is true. Yeah, which is your left hand.
SPEAKER_01:And that does make it a pain.
SPEAKER_04:Well, getting near the finish line.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah, I'm I know, I'm very excited. It's not long.
SPEAKER_04:So I was listening to the story of that Haley Cuoco. I don't know if you know this, but when she was about twenty two, which is only like ten years ago.
SPEAKER_01:Right, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:She was riding a horse, she was horseback riding, very athletic. She was on her way to be a tennis pro, and she was into equestrian sports. Anyway, one day she got bucked off her horse. And so she said landing was nothing, you know, it was fine, everything was cool. And then the horse started freaking out and stepped on her. Ah. And she had two compound fractures.
SPEAKER_01:Wow.
SPEAKER_04:So she had one bone sticking out of her ankle and one sticking out of her knee. Great. And she had to sign a thing before surgery that if they couldn't save her leg, she wouldn't sue them. Oh, wow. If she woke up with an amputation.
SPEAKER_01:Right. Yeah, I I've signed, probably signed something very similar to that, actually, you know, because I signed a whole bunch of stuff under the influence of drugs. Um, you know, they're like, okay, we need all these authorizations. I love that they do that after they give you for what? For the for my surgery.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, oh.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Uh well A lot of them, I I'd already signed a bunch of them before it even happened, but then while I was laying there on the gurney waiting for them to do it, I'm signing more.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, well, they do that like with cataract surgery. They give you a bunch of ketamine, and then they're like, here, sign this.
SPEAKER_01:Well, which of course I can't sign because I'm left-handed.
SPEAKER_04:I know. I had the same problem.
SPEAKER_01:So I'm, you know, trying to cray on an X in the uh in the right spot.
SPEAKER_04:Well, I had a the same problem because mine was on my the IV was going right into the space between my thumb and forefinger.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:So I couldn't write with that hand either.
SPEAKER_01:You could not.
SPEAKER_04:So anyway, they do that on purpose. Don't you think?
SPEAKER_01:I bet they do. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:They they destroy your penmanship.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:On purpose.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, well, uh they wanted to more you know, so a doctor's writing doesn't stand out so horribly.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yep.
SPEAKER_04:That's exactly what that's about. Yeah. Um yeah, I uh have been thinking a lot about surgery lately. Because there's there's been a lot of surgery lately.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:In our friend group. I th I think 'cause we're getting old.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that yeah. Yeah, that probably has something to do with it.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. So great. Um Province Town. We are having Holly Folly holidays. Oh, good. Which what else would we have?
SPEAKER_01:I'm very excited about that.
SPEAKER_04:Um and they are extending it to, it was just gonna be this last weekend, but they're extending it to do another weekend.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, good.
SPEAKER_04:So they're having local markets, entertainment, uh festive happenings about.
SPEAKER_01:Well, yes, everybody's gotta go, of course.
SPEAKER_04:An opportunity to reflect on human rituals.
SPEAKER_01:What the hell? Well, you know, it's I I agree. That is one of the one of the things that we all kind of do, at least a lot of us do, around this time of year. We're like a lot of us sit around and be ask, why are we doing this?
SPEAKER_04:You know, it makes sense. Yeah. Well, I mean, in Provincetown, I think it's like, you know, another good reason to put put on your heels and your red lipstick.
SPEAKER_01:Right, or uh nice uh something, nice fur around your neck because it's gotten pretty cold.
SPEAKER_04:It certainly has. You know, I found out recently that one of the places that makes you really feel cold is your neck.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And that if you put a small silk scarf just around your neck, it doesn't have to be tied, you can just tuck it in to whatever you're wearing.
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_04:Supposedly it keeps you surprisingly warm. That's interesting. And I am going to put that to the test. We'll have to try yeah, we'll have to try that out. Okay. Um I found a couple of other things that I actually want. Um there's this hat slash hood slash. I don't even know exactly how it would work how it works. It's hard to tell. But it's it's like a toque with a pom-pom, right? All right. Real cute. And then it's got like along the edge of the front, depending on which one you get, like faux fur or some sherpa, like a thick thing. Yeah. But then there's part two that comes over and goes around your neck, and if you want it up over your nose.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I see. So it's hat and scarf together.
SPEAKER_04:Right.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Yeah, I've seen I've seen one of those.
SPEAKER_04:Ah.
SPEAKER_01:Yes.
SPEAKER_04:I want that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think I've actually used one of those. It was pretty great.
SPEAKER_04:I want that. It's like uh it's like a stylish balaclava.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. Yep. Yeah, I've you actually used one of those very things where it was if you know the hat itself was decent enough, but no, you could wrap that thing around uh the back of your neck and right around the front again, and yeah. There you go. Get your whole face covered up. Like that. Right, yeah. I wonder what happened to that.
SPEAKER_04:Uh I don't know. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:My mine is hopefully like so many on the way things off somewhere wandering about in the pages of history. Wow, Michael.
SPEAKER_04:That was really profound. Um now, you and I love the animals more than pretty much anything else.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I mean, they are m our favorite people for the most part.
SPEAKER_04:Yes, are our animals. But in general, we were just hearing from one.
SPEAKER_01:I don't I don't know if people were listening. We were in the background, one of them was climb climbed on the back of Anne's chair and it was trying to make a statement.
SPEAKER_04:That's right. But the statement it's making is all right, I'll sit here. Yeah, I'll be okay for a minute. Um we had, of course, we're pretty used to this stuff, right whale entanglement um in the North Atlantic. Yeah. There's conservationists um found a right whale named Division um found entangled and severely injured and threatening the survival of one of the most endangered whole populations in the Atlantic.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Um it's not a it's not a huge group. No, I know. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:But do you know do you know about the right whales, like why they are um disappearing?
SPEAKER_01:I assume it has to do with habitat, but I don't I don't know. I mean, other than I've seen many of them. I just wonder if they're getting fished or you know, well, number one, and getting entangled in things is one of the one of the things.
SPEAKER_04:That's horrible.
SPEAKER_01:But I think uh climate change and uh, you know, the change of uh temperature in their normal breeding areas and stuff is is you know too high now. Things are very different, they're not working right well for them because uh you know global issues.
SPEAKER_04:Well, this this weather so far this year should be helping them out. Because we are having a good old-fashioned winter.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we're having a good one so far. I mean it you it just hasn't even really technically started, so but we have gotten so much. And uh yeah, it was very, very chilly the other night, yeah. So in the teens, so that's pretty cold.
SPEAKER_04:Well, I'm really glad that they found I hope this whale survives. It just breaks my heart when I think about these animals out there in the ocean tangled up in some man-made I've I've I've told you that story that one day I was at West Dennis Beach.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I know. And a guy said, Hey, I heard the the right whales are come, you know, in back up by uh Race Point. And uh and I said, They have? And I and I left right then. And I drove to Race Point and I stood far out on the beach, and I was the only person there, and I must have seen eighty of them. Well, that's back when you used to be so cool.
SPEAKER_04:When you used to get up early in the morning and go take photographs.
SPEAKER_01:There were things to take photographs of.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, no, that's because you you you happened to be on West Dennis Beach because you were over. Right.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And then you m ran into this man who said write whale alert. And so
SPEAKER_01:You were able to go up to I didn't get a lot of great pictures, but boy, it was really beautiful.
SPEAKER_04:It's hard to photograph.
SPEAKER_01:I saw a bunch of them like rolling around and you know, all the you could see you know all the blowhole action and everything everywhere. No big breaches or anything, but it was all just kind of lazy and beautiful. And there was so much of it. It just went on. And I was the only person there.
SPEAKER_04:Well, that's an extraordinary thing. Yeah. Extraordinary. Blowhole. What did you say? Blowhole what?
SPEAKER_01:Action.
SPEAKER_04:Action. Well, it's not Cape Cod if it's not blowhole action. That that's a very good point. It is a good point. I don't think people realize what go goes on here exactly. In the dunes on the Cape. Yeah. If you can name what song that is, DM me and you get a prize. Ooh. Yeah. Ooh. No, really. You think the dunes.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, I already I I already know. I mean, I know this I can can tell you the song and who did it.
SPEAKER_04:So right, but you don't count because you're not part of the audience. Um here's a major wildlife rescue that worked. Okay. Actually worked. Um here's a thing that we don't hear enough about. Authorities announced the largest wildlife trafficking bust on record.
SPEAKER_01:Oh.
SPEAKER_04:Receiving more than thirty thousand animals.
SPEAKER_01:Oh my God.
SPEAKER_04:From illegal captivity. Holy thirty thousand. Including birds, reptiles, small mammals, animals that were being sold, smuggled, or exploited across borders. Wow. And what makes this I know. It's like inconceivable. And so disgusting. It's classic. Wow. Let's let man handle this. Yeah, yeah. What makes this genuinely good news isn't just the amount. It's that the operation worked, you know, to get them.
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_04:The animals weren't just seized, they were placed into rehab and conservative programs.
SPEAKER_01:Good.
SPEAKER_04:So with many all being already being prepared for release back into protected habitats.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, yeah. Good. So this whole thing was. What a horrible thing.
SPEAKER_04:But what a wonderful thing.
SPEAKER_01:Wow. Th over 30,000 animals.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:That's just insane.
SPEAKER_04:And then in this world where we constantly hear or say too late or too big to fix.
SPEAKER_01:Right, right.
SPEAKER_04:Here's something that worked that got fixed. People coordinated laws were enforced. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:So it's a good reminder that when systems decide to function, even briefly, lives can actually be saved. I heard um someone pose a question, a thought project. What would happen to the planet if there was no internet for six months?
SPEAKER_01:Oh. It depends.
SPEAKER_04:Uh I I mean uh I'm talking about um the environment, not about what would happen, you know. Um I was thinking about it in terms of COVID. Okay. You know what I mean? That same sort of thing where magically within six months everything st got clean so fast or cleaner.
SPEAKER_01:Right, right, right. But the infrastructure itself was still being supported by humans.
SPEAKER_04:Right. But what I'm saying is um I'm just I'm curious let's let me put this a different way. I'm curious as to uh what effect um the internet so or or let's just say social media. Let's say social media got shut down uh for six months. Right. What do you think? What effect do you think that would have?
SPEAKER_01:Well, hold on. Um I mean I'm gonna look something up and see, uh yeah, because I I I know a little bit of something about something to do with this.
SPEAKER_04:I could say right now that I would love that. And I would gosh, you know, sometimes I would love to go back to a time before personal computers, before social media. Um when I think back onto some of my best times were before any of that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:You know, were up until I was older than I had been.
SPEAKER_01:Do you have your story? Yeah, they've actually uh banned several social media uh sites to anybody under 16 in Australia. Oh. They have uh Instagram, Facebook, Threads, Snapchat, YouTube, TikTok, Kick, Reddit, Twitch, and X. Um and those are just some of them.
SPEAKER_04:How long has that been going on?
SPEAKER_01:It just it just started.
SPEAKER_04:I can't wait to see what the results are.
SPEAKER_01:Uh Wednesday, last Wednesday.
SPEAKER_04:Huh. Well, that will be interesting to see.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so you it's very uh I thought it was really fascinating that you brought this up because I was just seeing about this this morning.
SPEAKER_04:So Well, and the thing I heard about this was from an interview that took place in like 2022. So it wasn't connected at all to that. Um, but I really I miss the times before I miss the times when just can't get enough was on the radio. Um and I forget sometimes, you know, when I think about college, when I think about those years after college, all those great years in New York. And that was without social media, that was without cell phones, it was without any of that stuff. You couldn't take a picture of every darn thing.
SPEAKER_01:Well, you know, no, because you'd have you know, you'd have to wait until you ended the roll of film, then they'd have to take it in to get it developed. And for me, that's a that's like a year-long process. Well, because it goes in a drawer. Yeah. Yeah, first. Right. Gotta marinate in a drawer for a while.
SPEAKER_04:Of course it does. Gives it that beautiful sepia finish.
SPEAKER_01:I guess. I don't yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Well, uh yeah, I just um I do forget that fun and happiness and funny, you know, there are ways that we accessed all of that, you know, meeting each other, throwing parties, you know.
SPEAKER_01:Right, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:We managed like with a phone call.
SPEAKER_01:Getting to someone else's house.
SPEAKER_04:Right.
SPEAKER_01:Right?
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. We used to be able to do that without GPS.
SPEAKER_04:Exactly. Remember maps? Oh wow, yeah. One of my favorite things on social media is um the stuff that people don't uh I've seen these things where parents quiz their kids uh and they say they have a list of things. What do you think this is? Right. I'll show them, or they'll ask them something like, what are the yellow pages?
SPEAKER_01:Right?
SPEAKER_04:They have no idea.
SPEAKER_01:No, of course not.
SPEAKER_04:And they're like, well, it sounds like some kind of, you know, they say what they think it is. Um, what's a rotary dial phone?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I've seen several videos of of people, parents trying to get their kids to use one.
SPEAKER_04:Oh my gosh!
SPEAKER_01:They don't have a clue. They don't have any idea what to do. Are you kidding me? No. Yeah, well, the kids are like trying to push, trying to push the button, you know. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:They don't know that you have to roll your No.
SPEAKER_01:No, and they would never even consider that because when have they ever had to do that? What a bunch of genius. It's so wild. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I feel like those are things I would teach my kid just as a matter of course.
SPEAKER_01:I would uh I would think so too, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:What do they do with push button phones? I guess they it looks more familiar to them, like a heat pad.
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_04:You know, a princess phone.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_04:Oh my gosh. Wow. Um, what else have you seen parents teaching their kids?
SPEAKER_01:Oh, well, I mean, that was that was you you that was what I had at the top of my head. I wasn't going any further than that.
SPEAKER_04:Well, I I tell you that um some of the things I hear are just crazy things I hear that the kids are saying.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, there's uh there's the uh other obvious one though. I'm sorry, the uh uh an analog clock.
unknown:Oh!
SPEAKER_04:Telling time!
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. That's one of my favorite things. Or asking a kid what time is it when it's quarter past six.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. And they say, what do they say again?
SPEAKER_01:They say twenty-five.
SPEAKER_04:Six twenty-five. Right. Because it's twenty-five.
SPEAKER_01:That's right, because twenty-five is a quarter.
SPEAKER_04:Right.
SPEAKER_01:Of a hundred, yeah, but not of an hour. Well, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Bunch of yutzes. Uh-huh. I don't it is it that they I guess it's a combination. They don't come in contact with I mean, you don't. I think that's a big part of it. But don't they like if you're in the city, right? If you're in New York City, I can tell you off the top of my head, a dozen places where there are clocks prominently displayed. Right, yeah. I would think when you see those on a regular basis, let's say you there's one on your way to work.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Don't you kind of figure that out?
SPEAKER_01:You can't look you know what? Because there's one right across the street from it or right next door that's also got a digital clock. But so that's where you're looking.
SPEAKER_04:You can't look at the clock, let's say, um outside Grand Central Station, which is one of the most famous clocks in New York, and it's huge.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And just look at that clock and say what time it is.
SPEAKER_01:There there may be many.
SPEAKER_04:They really can't tell time.
SPEAKER_01:Who cannot, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, that horrifies me.
SPEAKER_01:They are starting from what my what I understand, starting to uh teach cursive again. I'm just gonna say that. In school, because turns out it really is kind of required if you want to have a signature.
SPEAKER_04:That blows me on. Well, that's one thing. These kids that can't sign up.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, they can't sign a check or they can't sign they can't sign for anything because they don't have any, you know, they'll just print their name, I guess. Right. You know, I mean, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. Amazing. Amazing what a bunch of yuttes we have raised.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, it's so strange, isn't it?
SPEAKER_04:Well, that's part see, this is all part of, I mean, maybe maybe I'm being stupid. You know, maybe it doesn't matter, you know, that someone can't tell time off an analog clock, or that someone can't sign their signature. But I feel I feel like it does.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. I I mean I feel I feel like it certainly will eventually for for that person. You know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:It's there's going they're going to need it. One time or another. And of course, you know, we are nearing the uh the whole apocalypse. So again, well, yeah. I mean, not like the Mayan apocalypse or anything, but you know, with this end times, obviously. So uh, you know, we might not have digital. So you might have to revert back to the you know to the old things. How about a sundial? Do any of them know what a sundial is? Or how that works, or how it works? Well, I think you're pushing that a little far. I suppose so, because I knew that when I was six.
SPEAKER_04:Yep. Well, I mean, that's the thing. I truly do not understand, and I need someone to explain this to me. Seriously, why children are not taught how to tell time? Yeah. Why? It takes 15 minutes, which is what actually a quarter. Yeah. Yeah. Um, I I don't get that. Why is that not just basically something kids learn how to do? Children learn.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I'm small child. I don't know. And maybe they do other places in the world. I assume of course they do. I assume they do, but they sure as hell don't want to teach it to them here.
SPEAKER_04:I don't know what gets taught here. Weird math.
SPEAKER_01:I don't understand how math works with my children. With my like with my youngest kid. He does the he does math weird, and I don't get it.
SPEAKER_04:Well, they all do. Yeah. And I can't do if you just put a math problem down in front of me, the way that they do math now.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I can't do it. Right.
SPEAKER_01:And say show your work. Yeah. Nah. I'm not doing it. I'll show my work, which is gonna be completely different from what you want it to be. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I'm gonna over on the side here.
SPEAKER_01:I'll get the answer.
SPEAKER_04:I'm gonna divide right. I'm gonna do the actual math.
SPEAKER_01:Yep.
SPEAKER_04:The old math.
SPEAKER_01:You know, it's so funny. I because my brain is is wired the way that it is, uh, when I was in high school, I had a big problem with algebra, uh, with fractions. And um in upstate New York, well, in New York State, they have uh they have a program called the Regents Program. And it's uh it's a slightly elevated, you know, educational level of class that you're getting that requires uh state certified test in order for you to graduate with the with this particular uh uh degree, you know, high school degree. Yeah. Okay, well, um well, not everybody knows about the regents exam. It's not, you know, it doesn't exist everywhere. So but so I was taking the Regents classes and uh including uh algebra, uh-huh. Which is the the hardest algebra class they were gonna give me in high school. You know, it's it's not you know trigonometry, it's algebra.
SPEAKER_03:Right.
SPEAKER_01:But um when it came time for me to take the Regents exam at the end of the year, which counted as a quarter of your grade for the year, so it I mean it was you had to pass. Um I converted every single fraction into decimals, did the math, and then converted them all back into fractions. Perfect. That's how I did the test because it was the only way I could do it. And I pr and I I missed two questions on a test, and my teacher actually asked me about them, and uh I remembered the answers that I put, and she realized that I had put them there backwards. Uh-huh. I had aced the test, but I did it the wrong way. Well totally wrong way, but I did it.
SPEAKER_04:It's weird. Algebra, I loved algebra, it was the only math I ever really enjoyed.
SPEAKER_01:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_04:And then I hit Trig.
SPEAKER_01:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_04:And it was like I I had entered some, you know, dimension that worked on a different. Group of laws. Yes. I mean, I just could not even conceive of some of the things I was told to conceive of.
SPEAKER_01:I had to do the same thing with algebra, believe it or not, because there's a thing called Boolean algebra. Uh-huh. Which is how computers are what they're written with. And it is so bizarre. And what algorithms are written with, actually. Uh-huh. And I had to learn this stuff. And that's a blast. Yeah. But that is so bizarre because you can have the number one and you can have the number not one. Right. And what what the hell? Right? Right. Yeah. It's so it's just, yeah, it's really. And it's fun. It was fun. I did love I did love Boolean algebra.
SPEAKER_04:Do you think there should be a band called Boolean Algebra?
SPEAKER_01:Yep. Okay. I think there should.
SPEAKER_04:Just asking. Yeah. Just a confirmation.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I'm going to start it right now.
SPEAKER_04:Well, what I started to say.
SPEAKER_01:Taking applications, folks. Send me an email.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, do that. Send send Michael some emails or some other messages. Um send him some handwritten letters in cursive. That's what we want. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, definitely. Um, what I started to say was, so I get to, I guess it was my junior year of high school.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_04:My penultimate year.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And trigonometry, bam, hit me in the face.
SPEAKER_02:Right.
SPEAKER_04:And after algebra, I was like, puh, this is gonna be cool. Everyone thinks I suck at math, including myself, but I don't. And then it was, oh yes, I do.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah, because they're not the same thing.
SPEAKER_04:That's right. And so Mr. Dubois. Mr. Dubois blocks in signs and cosines and secants. Oh, don't even. Just don't say those words. Anyhow, um sentence. The worst part about all of that for me was drawing it, you know. Okay, so we make a circle, and we're, in other words, the linear left-to-right equations were gone.
SPEAKER_01:Right. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:It's like, wait a minute, how do you, and then you suddenly have to deal with shapes and angles, and oh, it was horrible. But anyhow, Mr. Dubois was our teacher. It was in a building called St. John. It was way far at the like outermost edge of the campus. I was at boarding school. So it took forever to get there. And um he was so frustrated with me. First of all, Mr. Dubois had the worst stutter ever.
SPEAKER_01:So that would be difficult. You can imagine at least, yeah, for me, that would be really difficult.
SPEAKER_04:Well, you can imagine this class, you know, of 11th graders, like trying to keep it together the first few classes. Uh, it was horrible. But anyway, we all got used to it. Um, he was a brave soul. Um, and then we have our SSATs.
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_04:Which now in that time in that place, that was the most important thing ever.
SPEAKER_01:Right. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:It was, and we took those tests in the spring of senior of uh junior year, I think it was. Yes, all about college placement. Exactly. And so it was also about you know, getting through school. It was about graduating. Our our right, yeah. Well, that's our panic about our grades was extreme. And uh in in that setting.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Anyway, so it's time for the math portion of, and this is not my proudest moment. This is one of those, I'm not gonna lie, moments.
SPEAKER_01:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_04:I purposely sat behind someone who was good at math.
SPEAKER_01:I see.
SPEAKER_04:I'm not even gonna say their name.
SPEAKER_01:Interesting, okay.
SPEAKER_04:Which is not for their protection, I guess it's for my protection. And I copied a lot of it.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_04:And afterwards, Mr. Dubois gave me such a thrashing. Well, it no, because he said to me, I am so mad at you. Obviously, you can do this when you put your mind to it.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And I was like, oh, I can do this when I'm sitting behind a math whiz on purpose. Right.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Um, I was horrible. But, you know, the terror of not getting into the college you want. Right. No, I I I totally understand it. Yeah. Uh I was absolutely beside myself. The rest of it, English, what are the other um subjects? Is it just a bunch of English and a bunch of math?
SPEAKER_01:Language.
SPEAKER_04:But which language?
SPEAKER_01:Well, I I don't know.
SPEAKER_04:No, because everyone was taking different languages. I don't know how you would make a standardized test.
SPEAKER_01:But maybe it was Oh, you mean, oh, for for the the Regence exam, it was just English. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Right. No, I mean for the SSATs.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, yeah, that's a good question.
SPEAKER_04:You know, there was English.
SPEAKER_01:I guess you had different parts of English, like reading comprehension, um Oh yeah, and grammar and uh and there's actual there was actual uh creative, you know, writing, write 250 words and this and that. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:But then and then you had what several different math things and then and that was it? We're doing math and English?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, basically.
SPEAKER_04:Okay. Yeah. Yeah, because I couldn't remember if there were other subjects. So yeah, that was an important thing. And what would have happened, I wonder. Would I be doing this show if I hadn't cheated?
SPEAKER_01:Oh no.
SPEAKER_04:It's interesting. I wonder what well, what might have happened to me? You know, how would the course of my life have been different?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. That is that is an interesting thing to think about.
SPEAKER_04:There's a man.
SPEAKER_01:It could be very tiny, you know, tiny little things could, you know, just change the whole thing.
SPEAKER_04:Well, I mean, just the fact that had I gone to a different college, things would have been a hundred percent different. Yeah, true, true. Completely different. Um a man who volunteers at a local animal shelter started doing something unusual.
SPEAKER_01:What do you what's what do you do? What do you do?
SPEAKER_04:Well, it's something we might want to do.
SPEAKER_01:Did he start barking?
SPEAKER_04:Close. Okay. It's something we should we might want to start doing. Okay.
SPEAKER_01:I'm ready.
SPEAKER_04:Um, a man who volunteers at a local animal shelter started putting shelter dogs in a backpack and takes them out into the public to like coffee shops, parks, sidewalks. Uh-huh. And the people, um, people stop him, people ask him questions about the dogs, people fall in love with the dogs, and they end up adopting adopting the dogs. And these are dogs that were overlooked in cages. I know, it's so sad. They're now getting adopted. I love this. Because people see their faces, their calmness, their personalities, no applications, no nonprofit rebrand, no billion-dollar initiative. Just one person saying, Let me physically carry the problem closer to people's hearts.
SPEAKER_01:I like it.
SPEAKER_04:And I totally get it.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, if we weren't already filled to the gills with animals, I I would I mean, I we might we might have to, you know, like think about a uh like being a uh foster for an animal.
SPEAKER_04:Oh yeah, that would work beautifully.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I think I think all of our animals would be very accepting.
SPEAKER_04:That's not what I'm talking about. Okay. You're saying foster.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Meaning Oh, you know, temporary. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, right. So you and I are gonna get a dog and we're only gonna have it for a month or until it gets adopted.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Uh-huh. And then when that day comes, we're gonna be fine. Oh no, no, we're not gonna be able to do that. We're just gonna say, yeah, okay. Yeah, take the dog.
SPEAKER_01:You won't be at all fine.
SPEAKER_04:It's all yours.
SPEAKER_01:No. Yeah, no problem. No, we'd end up with 25 dogs. Exactly.
SPEAKER_04:Exactly. We cannot find out.
SPEAKER_01:Seems like a good idea, really.
SPEAKER_04:I know. And 25 dogs seems like a good idea.
SPEAKER_01:We got the room.
SPEAKER_04:We've got the room. Um, we can afford it, no problem. Sure, we can afford to feed 25 more dogs and take them to the vet.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, can you imagine the vet trips?
SPEAKER_04:No, I can't. We'd have to get some sort of vehicle, some sort of like, I don't know, what would you get?
SPEAKER_01:A panel van or no, no, what you would have to do is you'd have to uh get a car and have the vet driven here.
SPEAKER_04:Exactly. You'd have to buy a car for the vet. That would be less expensive.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Um, right. I think you're right. That's exactly right. Um rather than trying to schlep 25 dogs on leashes. How is that even working? None of this is working, Michael. It doesn't seem to be. You know.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know what I don't know what's going on, though.
SPEAKER_04:But well, you brought this up that you would like 25 dogs. Yeah. Um, and I'm saying that like that's a bad thing. I'm pointing out the difficulties that we might have.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, no, I agree.
SPEAKER_04:Primarily the financial a few bumps in the road.
SPEAKER_01:Uh yeah.
SPEAKER_04:A few, you know, barriers we'd have to jump over. A few banks we'd have to rob.
SPEAKER_01:I agree. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. Yeah. Unfortunately.
SPEAKER_01:And me one-handed.
SPEAKER_04:Well, for now.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Oh, I get yeah, I guess that will that is gonna change later today.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, exactly. So um you'll be two-handed, and that will be great.
SPEAKER_01:Until I get the other one done.
SPEAKER_04:Right, and that's a ways off.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Um, all right. I just think you know what I really enjoy is these, and you see this a lot on Instagram and TikTok and stuff, okay. Are these people, these dog walkers who who walk, you know, who are in charge of like twenty-five dogs.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:But there are like five people, you know. It's it's like a whole group.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_04:And they play together. They have a there's this um this group in Israel that they have a huge sort of um doggy daycare situation. Okay, I like it. So it's this big um fenced in lawn, and then they take them out, it's it's near Tel Aviv, they take them out and they walk walk them in the streets. And so each one has like five dogs.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Okay. And it's the cutest thing, each one knows the name of each one. And so and they line them up every Friday, and it's amazing those the way those dogs line up. Yeah, I'll I'll I'll bet. And they just sit there as as someone goes through, good morning, this one, that one, that one, that one. They all know all 25 names.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Anyway, I want to do something like that.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, yeah. I like the dog bus.
SPEAKER_04:Uh the dog bus. Where is the dog bus?
SPEAKER_01:I'm not sure where the dog bus is, but I've seen a couple there's a I've seen a few videos of the dog bus, and it's the cutest thing ever. Where and it's going to some kind of, you know, doggy daycare as well. Right.
SPEAKER_04:But uh And there's that woman um on the bus that kind of runs things. They get treats, they get birthday parties, you know, depending on Apparently there's quite a few. Of dog buses?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah. Oh. I uh there's one that got featured in uh Boston. The Bark Bus.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, you're kidding. No. Oh, I have to check that out. See, now here's the part of that that's Muskego, Wisconsin. There's yeah, there's hard for me to understand. How do you get your dog to just put on its little backpack and hop on the bus?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, well, because once you get them there the first time, that may be all you need to do because they know their pals are gonna be on the bus. I don't know. I'm thinking about our dogs. And there's gonna be snacks and stuff. Are you kidding me? If they knew that their buddies were gonna be on a bus and they could and they just had to go wait down the end of the driveway for it to come by, they'd run right on it.
SPEAKER_04:Really?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Wow. Well, we should we should get and but where do we maybe they could bring them here. Maybe the this could be the the stop on the dog bus.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. I like that.
SPEAKER_04:And we could we could have the school. But oh my gosh. Uh oof. I've been staying away from some more difficult subjects. Um but one is, and and this is why Michael chose the song as an intro. Rob Reiner and his wife were killed by their son, who used a knife to slit their throats. I I can't each one of those words as I say them does not feel real. What it's so heartbreaking, so upsetting, so bizarre. Uh and the jackass that runs this country had stuff to say about it. I never say anything about him. That's part of the policy of the show, but what he said was so disgusting. I also want to mention what happened on Bondai Beach on the first night of Hanukkah. There was Hanukkah by the sea. There were dozens of people there celebrating the first night of Hanukkah. And two gunmen opened fire on these people who ranged from tiny children to men and women in their 80s and 90s. And 16 were killed, and dozens of others are injured in the hospital. So it's been a rough weekend, to say the least. Um, over the weekend. So for everyone affected by any and all of these tragedies, please put a light on.
