Death By Adulting
A podcast focused on helping you make decisions today that you won't regret tomorrow. Hosted by Dr. Steve and Megan Scheibner. The Scheibners share wisdom and advice regarding marriage, parenting, dating, communication and even sex.
Death By Adulting
Parenting Tips for Stronger Family Bonds
Ever wondered why kids form friendships so easily while adults struggle to break the ice? Today, we examine the magical world of children's social interactions, reflecting on the effortless way they engage with strangers and form bonds. We share practical tips for parents, like the red flag, green flag system to manage neighborhood playtimes. This episode is all about embracing humility and staying open to connections at any age, ensuring that both children and adults navigate social situations with ease and grace.
Next, we tackle the tricky topic of honesty, inspired by a personal story of watching "Incredibles 2" twice and its lessons on truthfulness. We dive into when, if ever, lying might be justified, touching on real-world historical scenarios like hiding Jews during WWII. We offer strategies for parents to teach the value of truth, prevent manipulation, and manage social requests effectively. It's about proactive parenting—setting expectations and leading by example to foster integrity in children.
Finally, let's talk about building stronger relationships and expanding social circles. Learn how proactive planning can help manage children's behavior and prevent family disruptions. We also discuss the importance of inclusive hospitality, encouraging kids to invite diverse peers and develop empathy. This episode concludes with practical advice on communication, forgiveness, and rescuing children from negative influences, all aimed at creating a kinder, more inclusive community for our kids. Join us for a thoughtful discussion on navigating the complexities of social interactions for both children and adults.
On this episode of Death by Adulting. Red flag, green flag Is there ever an appropriate time to lie? How to avoid an ambush from your child, how to respond to a child who puts you on the spot, how to rescue your kid from a bad situation, plus Meg's adulting pro tip of the day, and much, much more. Roll the intro.
Speaker 2:Do you ever wish you could ask older you if the decisions you made today turned out okay tomorrow? You know, in this crazy world of adulting, sometimes the only thing we know for sure is we don't have to like it, we just have to do it. And if we have to do it anyway, why not do it? Well, that's why we're here. We're Dr Stephen Megan Scheibner, you're on demand personal old farts and we're here to help you make good decisions today that you'll be proud of tomorrow.
Speaker 1:All right Welcome to another episode of Death by Adulting.
Speaker 2:All right, welcome to another episode of Death by Adulting.
Speaker 1:Yeah, here we are. Yeah, how are you doing today?
Speaker 2:Meg, I'm good, good I'm good yeah, I'm glad. Yeah, we kind of teased what this episode was about in the last episode when we were talking about adults in hospitality. But is it a weird concept to think that kids practice hospitality too?
Speaker 1:Well, kids are very social. And here's the funny thing about kids and their social lives. You know kids when, when you go to the park or you go someplace where there's total stranger kids, kids will just immediately dive in together. They'll organize in some sort of game, they start playing. There's always some sort of leader who's like directing the activity and they play together for maybe hours on end and then you come back and you go what's your friend's name? And they go.
Speaker 2:Oh, no, my new best friend yeah.
Speaker 1:He's my new best friend, but I don't know his name. Right, there's a natural instinct of children to play well together and uh, so they're very social, right?
Speaker 2:That may be a dynamic at our age too, cause there's times I think, hey, you're my best friend, what is your name?
Speaker 1:dynamic at our age too, because there's times I think hey, you're my best friend, what is your name? It's only because you've forgotten their name. It's funny that dynamic, though, because when you're a kid, you just dive in and you don't even think twice about it. Then there's kind of a long period in your life where you're very, you know, on guard about relationships and don't talk to that person. And I think about some of our 20 and 30 something kids, and they're like you know, like this about relationship Well, you don't just talk to somebody, and you and I now we're a little older, right, so when we're in line at the grocery store, we're chatting it up with people we don't even know, and I don't, I'm not going to get their name.
Speaker 2:It's mortifying to some children, but to some of our 20, something it's like you can't just talk to that person?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can. I want to be more like that little kid who just jumped in and started playing and I don't know who you are, but you might be interesting.
Speaker 2:I just like talking to people. Well, I think it's a switch from being unselfconscious which children are, they're very unselfconscious to being self-conscious, which is oh, I don't know if they want me to play. I don't know if they want me to play, I don't know if I'm invited, I don't know if they'll like me which makes you, as you become self-focused, you begin to hold back, which, honestly, you end up with less friends because people think you're not friendly, and it's a vicious cycle.
Speaker 1:I think for me, the more you embrace God's humility programs in life and the older you get, you've embraced a lot of humility programs. I think you just become more of a humble person. That just likes people. I don't really care what you think about me one way or another, but, um, you look interesting. I'm going to ask you some questions here from you know, and maybe we'll exchange a good recipe or two in the line. I don't know, Um, but I'm not intimidated by that process.
Speaker 2:I've had so many dumb things happen in my life that I just assume they happen in yours too and we can share our dumb experiences.
Speaker 1:I'm not afraid anymore that you're going to like me or not going to like me. Okay, so we started out with this red flag, green flag thing. What? What is red flag, green flag all about?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, one of the frustrations as a mom for me was that, um, now we lived, we lived places where our kids were kind of isolated for a lot of their growing up years. But then we moved to an area where we were right in the center of the neighborhood and the neighbor kids were over all the time. And it wasn't that my kids were practicing hospitality, it's just there were kids there all the time. And, um, I, there was a realization of how easy it was to want to lie. So when a neighbor kid would come and knock on the door and it wasn't convenient for us to have anyone over, you know, there's a temptation to say to the kids shh, don't let anyone know we're here. Or if my kids were really in trouble, I didn't want to open the door and have to say to the neighbor kid well, they can't play today because they they're all grounded and they won't be seeing the light of day for two weeks. Right, we, you don't. You don't want to be forced into having to share those things.
Speaker 2:So that's when I came up with red flag, green flag, and I just told all the neighbor kids when the green flag is out, you can come over. I'm ready. The kids are ready, um, have at it. Come be at our house Now. Now, moms, i'm'm gonna tell you, when the green flag is out, it isn't that the kids are all there and you're off doing your own thing. When the green flag was out, I needed to be aware and available. Those are the two a's of the green flag, right? But when the green flag was out, kids were welcome. But I also told the neighborhood kids when the red flag is out, don't come knock on the door. I didn't want to have to explain why the kids couldn't play. Sometimes it was just we were busy, but sometimes it would have been embarrassing to our kids to say, well, here's why they can't play. And so the red flag was just a real simple way to let the neighborhood kids know this just isn't a good time.
Speaker 1:And I didn't have to lie, describe the red flag green flag to me, cause it wasn't, you know, it was like a big old American flag out front. It was one of those porch ones.
Speaker 2:You know, you put that little porch hanger on our porch and it was just on a stick and I stuck it in the porch hanger. But it was by the front door and so kids knew, they knew, oh, the green flags out, Right.
Speaker 1:Well, so we always had the biggest family in the neighborhood because we had eight kids and when you have a big family, that everybody comes to your house and I was home right, so there's in your neighborhood, there's probably somebody that that fits that description if it's you great.
Speaker 1:If it's not, there's another family. That's where all the kids want to hang out and you like your kids hanging out there, because big families, just. There's a lot going on and the mom is like a second mom and all that. But again I, when they came over to our house, we just taught all the neighbor kids when they came over if the red flags out, don't come over yeah and that's really easy, and they're like oh yes, mrs shriver you know, and then when they see the red flag, they'd, sometimes they'd, pace back and forth.
Speaker 1:You know, yeah, especially the younger children.
Speaker 2:Yeah right, yeah, it's not a good time kind of a danger for me anyway, because I do like peace and quiet is if you do the red flag, green flag, you have to put the green flag out, sometimes Correct, right, and it is a sacrifice as a mom because you're handling your own kids but throw another one in the mix.
Speaker 1:Sure.
Speaker 2:And it's just a different dynamic.
Speaker 1:Don't forget that you bought it all together and just leave the red flag out forever.
Speaker 2:Well, those people.
Speaker 1:the red flag's always out All the neighboring kids are going to be like they never have us over anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah you're going to get egged, teepeed, teepeed, all right.
Speaker 1:That's a good one. So on the tease underneath the red flag, green flag thing I said is there ever an appropriate time to lie? Thing I said is there ever an appropriate time to lie? That's this is. I don't want to get too philosophical about this, but we can get a little philosophical about it. Is there ever an appropriate time to lie? What are your thoughts?
Speaker 2:um, I no, but yes, how's that okay? Why is?
Speaker 1:it. I guess my next question is why isn't this just a definitive answer, like the answer is never.
Speaker 2:Well, there are things like surprise parties or we did the you did great plate at dinner for kids that had excelled in something during the day usually character. And when kids came up to me and saw me filling it and said who's getting the? You did great plate. You know I could say, well, it's none of your business, or Well, that's, yeah, None of your business is not a lie.
Speaker 1:You didn't say like it's, it's for Nate, and then it ended up being for Peter.
Speaker 2:I never did that, but I but I didn't. I didn't divulge all the information they wanted. How's that Actually? That was just what's for dinner.
Speaker 1:So that's just to me, that's just being kind of elusive or yeah, of elusive, or yeah.
Speaker 2:but that is a form of lying okay, all right. I mean because, lying we want to say lying is just I told an untruth, but lying could be. I'm withholding information. Lying could be I gave you this much truth but I hid this much untruth. Lying could be I exaggerated lying could be I under exaggerated. Right, there's lots of levels to lying.
Speaker 1:So we get so irritated with our politicians because they never answer a question. You know they're always obfuscating and avoiding answering the question when you know sometimes the answer is just yes or no.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm going to take another little sidetrack with this. Lying is Steve and I. I would say we laugh, but actually we're irritated when parents say well, my child doesn't lie, because the scripture is very clear we are born liars. Now some it's an art form, Like they just are so good at lying and they do it all the time. It just doesn't even make any sense. But there is no one who doesn't lie. Correct Right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's true. There's nobody that doesn't lie. So, again, get over that part of it. But is there ever an appropriate? I know the inappropriate times to lie, which is most of the times when I lie. It's inappropriate, but is there ever an appropriate time I I would say you're absolutely right about the surprise party. Uh, I've lied to people out you know, oh no we're not doing you.
Speaker 1:We're out of town saturday and we're planning a surprise party for them because we don't want to ruin the surprise. It's typically called a little white lie. Right, it's a little sanctioned lie.
Speaker 2:Yeah, two things.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Don't ever lie about a surprise party to me. Just tell me I hate surprises.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know you hate surprise parties.
Speaker 2:But I'm thinking about. We had friends up in Maine and you'll remember this story. We had all seen the Incredibles 2 was coming out and we vowed to one another that we would go together to see us and this other couple. I remember this now.
Speaker 2:We were actually in Disney and went and saw Incredibles 2. And then we got home and we went with that couple to see the Incredibles 2. And you said to me we're not telling them. And I couldn't not. I said you guys, I have to tell you something, we already saw this. And they said, yeah, we did too. Yes, but I was the weak link.
Speaker 1:We were both prepared to lie to each other to spare the other person's feelings right me, I couldn't do it so know, is that an appropriate time to lie?
Speaker 1:You just confessed it and that was the right way to handle it. Right, we just fessed up. And you know, when I was going through seminary, I remember being in an ethics class and this question came up Is it ever an appropriate time to lie? And we debated about it a little bit. You know, for instance, let's say you're, um, it's world war two, you're in Germany and you're hiding Jews in your basement and the Nazis come to your door and say do you have any Jews in your house? Is that an appropriate time to lie?
Speaker 1:The agreement in the class was yes, you have competing virtues, virtues, the virtue of truthfulness and honesty, and then the virtue of life and death and sparing somebody's life. And but the? The answer that we came up with in the class was um, you answer the question, but it's a deceptive answer. It's, it's, it's not a full out lie, uh, but you could be, you could employ sarcasm and say oh, yeah, I've got, uh, we got a bunch of jews under the table, right, well, that's not inaccurate. They're in the basement, underneath the table, right, right, and so it's underneath your dining room table, but it's all the way down in the basement? Um, that would be one way to try to avoid the lying part. But honestly, I think in a situation like that, everybody understands if there's life and death, there's a higher moral, there's a higher moral calling.
Speaker 2:But I think we have to clarify, because I think too often we disregard lying in our children because they have a competing virtue. But their competing virtue is I'll be in trouble or I won't be in trouble. And when they choose the lie, to not be in trouble, that's not a competing virtue, right, right, and we need to help them recognize that.
Speaker 1:Boy, we really got off on a rabbit trail on this we did, but I knew we would on this one but, I for the most part, 99% of the time.
Speaker 2:there's not an appropriate time to lie Uh the red flag, green flag flag though there are, there are things in our life that tempt us to lie, and so if we can find a way to avoid that temptation, Sure.
Speaker 1:And I think the takeaway from this one is uh, your kids and yourself check how often you lie or you exaggerate and manipulate through that process. Your children are going to do the same thing and so you have to teach into that it's not okay to lie. Um, I read in parent magazine, probably 20 years ago, an that said lying is a developmental stage in a child's life and it's appropriate.
Speaker 2:No, it's never appropriate On their way to jail. Yeah, on their way to jail.
Speaker 1:It's never an appropriate developmental step in anybody's life.
Speaker 2:Can I add something to something you just said? This is a really important concept for parents. You said if they learn it from you, they're going to do it too. I would say, if they learn it from you, they're going to do it more. Right, what's acceptable for us becomes even bigger in their lives, both good and bad. Right. Right they get, because the things we're excited about our kids get even more excited about and the things we're failing at excited about our kids get even more excited about and the things we're failing at.
Speaker 1:Often they fail even more Right, very good, okay. So the second question I had in the tease in the beginning was how to avoid an ambush from your child. What, what, what is that? What do you mean? An ambush?
Speaker 2:And you and I both dealt with this. But we have those children that you know would come up to us after baseball practice. So they'd come up to us after church with another child in tow and then they would say um, you know, can Maggie come over today?
Speaker 2:I already asked her parents and they said it's okay, and you look over and Maggie's parents are going sure, right and um, and that always put us on the spot and and it was so irritating it took both of us a while to realize. Why does this bother me so much?
Speaker 1:Why did it bother you so much?
Speaker 2:Because I felt like they were manipulating me.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's absolutely what was going on, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And now you know, don't think we're being bad parents or we're trying to. You know, it was the situation that was the problem, and the manipulation of the situation. I love it when my kids go to somebody else's house. There was lots of really great adults that we wanted them to spend the day with. That wasn't the issue. So what do you? How would you teach into that with parents, how to avoid getting into that manipulative situation and avoid the confrontation with the child that's trying to ambush you?
Speaker 2:Well, the word that we use is preactivity. But I think there's preactivity on both sides, for the parents and for the kids and so we just trained our kids, taught them and said you have to ask me before you invite someone over. So if you want someone to come over after church tomorrow, you ask me Saturday night.
Speaker 1:So explain the concept of preactivity a little bit.
Speaker 2:So preactivity is helping your kids be successful. You say this may come up. So before it comes up and we have a wrong decision, let's talk through what a right decision would be.
Speaker 1:Right, but the key to that whole thing is doing it before. Yes, you have that. That's the three.
Speaker 2:That's why I'm saying Saturday night, cause even Sunday morning is a bad time, because Sunday morning with eight kids, right.
Speaker 1:So different examples. You're talking about Sunday morning church and Saturday night you pre-activity your child. If this happens tomorrow, I'm going to say no, okay, if you come up to me and say, mommy, I talked to Megan, she asked me to come over to her house. Megan's not next to you, her parents aren't anywhere. Is that okay with you? That's the appropriate way to do it. The inappropriate way is with Megan, all smiles, and you know how do you say no to that? You would pre-activity that the night before.
Speaker 1:Other examples in our life were let's say you've got a child where you know there's always going to be a problem going out the door and getting in the car. You know they're going to forget something, they're going to drag their feet, they're not going to come, they're going to want to play with something and you say, come on, we got to go. You would pre-activity that child. Probably first thing in the morning You're going to say, hey, we're going to the grocery store later on today. When I say to you, put down your toys and let's go out to the car, what do I expect you to do? And then walk them through what you expected. You're going to pre-activity them so that they've got the courage, if you will, to be successful at that time. But you've already spoken into it with them instead of springing it on them.
Speaker 2:Well, and I think we give our kids too good of a motive. I mean there's a reason they do that, there's a reason they come up when we're busy or we're trying to get home or whatever it is, to ask those questions, because they know that they've got us, we don't have time to think and we're going to say a split second, yes. So the preactivity for the parent is especially if you know you have children who get invited places, children who other families are going to want to have over, to think through your day ahead of time, like, I would think, saturday night, what does Sunday afternoon look like? And if it was a day that the kids couldn't go somewhere, I would say to them on our way to church hey, by the way, we're all coming home today. Nobody's going to anyone's house, because then they aren't going to come to me and ask. And if they did that, that was a whole different thing, because they then they were being foolish, they knew and they were overstepping a line.
Speaker 1:Right, so you walk your child, kind of rehearse it with how you want it to go, cause we want them to be successful.
Speaker 2:We don't and we don't want to frustrate them. It's kind of like the green flag, red flag. If you can say yes, say yes, but you don't always have to say yes, right?
Speaker 1:especially if you got some sort of family thing that you were going to do and then this one child you know comes and says I want to go do this. Yeah, it's, it's very awkward. Yeah, pre-activity is wonderful in in most every situation. If you have a repeat problem with a child, then pre-activity that child ahead of time, tell them what you expect and then rehearse with them how you would like it to go, and I think you'll see a lot of success and a transformation in that child's behavior.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's okay to say no, it is. It really is, because sometimes it's just that you know it's not good for that child. That may be the big reason. Yeah, now for you. It's not a good idea for you to go.
Speaker 1:You are the older, wiser, adult in their life, you see the danger that lie ahead and you know how to avoid it. And so you're walking that child through that process so that they don't repetitively fall into the same trap over and over and over again like a fool.
Speaker 2:Right, right.
Speaker 1:Okay, so that's how to respond to a child who puts you on the spot. Um, how do you rescue your kids from a bad situation?
Speaker 2:Well, this is kind of a bigger and we're going to throw in some how to's with this. But sometimes, um, we want to help our kids practice hospitality, right, we're saying to them oh, you can have a friend over, what are you going to do with your friend? What kind of snacks would you like? We're helping them think through it, cause when kids practice hospitality or build relationships by having others into the home moms that's not your job, and if your child isn't old enough to kind of figure those things out by themselves, they shouldn't be doing it.
Speaker 2:It is not helpful to our kids to have us micromanage every moment and to be the mommies that go well, you're going to play this, and then we're going to watch this movie, and and then, look, I got you a craft, and then you want them to take ownership of it, right, I think maybe that's why some young adults have so much trouble practicing hospitality is mom did it for them their whole lives. And now we're saying to them, especially in the church setting well, invite people over. And they're like I don't know how, so let your kids do that. I don't know how, so let your kids do that. But sometimes hospitality for kids looks like we're having a family over that has children and the children turn out to be not very nice and you want to talk into that. How do you, how do you diplomatically rescue your kids from kids who are not good kids?
Speaker 1:Well, I think sometimes you get caught off guard by that. As a parent, you don't know that the kids you're inviting over aren't very good kids and they're going to break your kids' stuff or they're going to be just loud and obnoxious or bully or bullies or take advantage of your kids. So if you do get caught in that situation, I think the first thing is you go and you ask your kids for forgiveness, and that's a vulnerable position to be in. But we've done it with our kids. I remember we had this one people, this couple, over with their kids and their kids were just horrible and I kept having to scold my kids and my kids were like I could see the frustration in their face like, dad, it's not me and I'm like okay, all right. So afterwards I said kids, we didn't know, we didn't know what their kids were like, but we we're going to make a vow to you. We're never going to have that family over again and you know what Mom and dad should have. We should have looked into it a little bit more. Sorry, we put you in that situation. Will you please forgive us?
Speaker 1:And kids are very generous with that. They're like yeah, dad, I forgive you and you're right, they were awful, and so some of those things are. You have to learn after the fact. But that's what the reset button is, that asking for forgiveness is wonderful and you should do it upfront, not as a last resort, right? So that's, that's one. The second is do a little bit of research to, uh, to a family coming over, just if you see their kids or their, their holy terrors, uh, out in public, they're probably going to be a holy terror in your house and and do you want to expose your kids to that? Uh, that's, that's another way you would kind of preactivity yourself. Before you invite somebody over, what would you do?
Speaker 2:Well, I think, uh, what you said that's great, but I think one of the biggest things with allowing our kids to build relationships by bringing other kids into the home is we do have to be available and, and I think too often it's like, ooh, I'm off duty, they're off playing. But we need to kind of have ears going. Um, you know, a rule in our house was no shut doors. Nothing good happens behind a closed door and I know that from when I was a child and I knew that with my kids, and so, closed doors, I can't hear what's happening. Now I wasn't like hanging out listening to their conversations, but you can get an idea of what's going on. I was available to have them come sit and have a snack and chat with the people.
Speaker 2:As a parent, especially in the culture we're in now, I would say if you're having a child over who you don't know, the parents you haven't met met them before that child comes into your home, reach out and meet the parents, because there's just too much litigation, right, too many things that could go wrong with that, and so so you have to be aware, and then I'll throw this little one in.
Speaker 2:But, um, start from the time they're little. No mixed genders in bedrooms. Because one of the worst dynamics we get into as parents is we let our kids do something, we let it be the norm, the habit, and then we go well, now you can't do it anymore. And then it's a tug of war. And so the wise parent sees the danger ahead and goes you know what, when you're 13, I'm not going to want that boy in your room or I'm not going to want that girl in your room and, and as parents we just need to be alert to those things. We had friends who told us they had some mattresses stored different places in their house that they had to get rid of because their kids got to puberty, and every time they turned, around.
Speaker 1:They were on the mattress with someone from the opposite sex you know, but but an unaware parent is going to miss that.
Speaker 1:And then there's big bad consequences parent is going to miss that, and then there's big bad consequences. I agree with you. I um, let me just teach you to this for just a minute, because years ago there was an article in Christianity Today, uh, and it was titled Elsewhere and it was talking about these things. It was talking about our, our devices and our phones, and I think it was somewhere around the 2007, 2008 timeframe, when the iPhone first came out and the new dynamic then in the cultural transformation was everybody was heads down in one of these things, looking at it, and so it's an epidemic.
Speaker 1:These days, everybody, every place you go, is heads down looking at their phone, including parents that have other children over to their house, or their own children. You have no idea what your children are doing. Why? Because your brain and your emotions are someplace else. They're wrapped up in this thing, so you're not even hearing what's going on. So Megan was saying pay attention to what's going on in your home behind closed doors, and so forth. Well, if you're elsewhere, you're not going to be able to do that. So there's got to be some discipline involved in these things. Maybe have times that you turn them off during the day, or turn them off when your kids are home or other kids are coming over to the house, then have maybe a set time at the evening where you turn it on, get caught up with your texts and emails and then turn them back off again. This thing is insidious. You'll be elsewhere and things are going on around you that you're not even aware of. What are your thoughts on that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, you just prompted something when you shared that I, our kids are grown now. But if, if I had younger kids, especially teenagers, in the home that were having friends over, I think I'd have a phone corral that their phone and their friend's phone just went to the phone corral and and you could be nice about it and say, hey, just spend time talking to each other, you don't need your phones. But there's a lot that's dangerous on those little, you know, little machines that, especially if you're unaware, your kids could be exposing someone else or they could be being exposed, and so I think maybe there's just some care that needs to go into that.
Speaker 1:And let me, let me try to answer an objection here before we go any further, because there's I you know, sometimes in the comments on our, on our podcasts, I get comments like hey, boomers, lighten up, you're right. Okay, that's, that's immature to say that, for one thing. Um, the whole premise of this show, this program death by adulting is you're talking to an older you and 30 or 40 years from now, are the decisions that you made today Were they good decisions? The things associated with this. This is wisdom talking to you from the future, saying have a time where you put it down.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying your phone goes away altogether or you don't ever get on your phone. I'm not that naive. I enjoy my phone as well, but I've learned over the years because of the relationships that I have. There's times where I need to put it down or I need to put it in a drawer and I need to focus on the people around me. If you have little children, especially if you've got preteens and teens, you better focus on them and find out what they're doing, and so there's times where you got to put this thing down. That's just wisdom talking to you from sometime down the road.
Speaker 2:And again when they want to open their heart to you and you're like this just a minute, just a minute, you've lost an opportunity. Right, Right, Right. You absolutely have All right.
Speaker 1:How to rescue your kid from a bad situation. That's pretty good. All right, it's time for Meg's pro adulting tip of the day. Take it away, meg.
Speaker 2:Okay, okay. Well, when we talked about adults in hospitality, I said it's important to invite people that aren't your normals over. Don't invite the same people all the time. The same is true for your kids. Make sure it's not just their little clique that they invite over. Help them to invite other people, to become the kids who draw out others, especially those children who might not be invited places. You know what your child can become an advocate for a child that feels left out, and what a great opportunity that is for them to really grow and change themselves as they bring a blessing into someone else's life.
Speaker 1:Excellent.
Speaker 2:Excellent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, good stuff.
Speaker 2:All right. Well, this has been death by adulting, and remember, when it comes to adulting, what doesn't kill you just makes you tired.