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Tuesday Talks!
Join me for weekly discussions about ALL things education...from preschool through high school! As a mom, Speech Language Pathologist, and educator, I share my personal experiences related to each week's topic in relatable and informative ways.
My message about education is powerful: Reflecting on what is and making waves to cause change!
Tuesday Talks!
When Kids Lead The Conference, Everyone Learns (Part 2)
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Last week's episode got a lot of parents, teachers and administrators talking! Some in support of the shift and some opposed to it. We are continuing the conversation from last week's episode discussing the shift from parent-teacher conferences to student-led conferences.
Dr. Tiffany shares supportive and oppositional feedback from fifth-grade teachers to middle school admin offices to parents of quiet second and fourth graders. The wins are tangible: students name where they grew and where they’re stuck, parents get a more honest window into school life, and teachers see better follow-through on goals. The concerns are honest too: workload, shy students, and expectations for data. Instead of glossing over them, Dr. Tiffany offers a roadmap that respects constraints and builds capacity over time.
The centering thought is this: When students speak…we all learn something new!
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Tuesday Talks is hosted by Dr. Tiffany. She has been a Speech/Language Pathologist for 20 years. She's also a speaker and educational consultant. Dr. Tiffany hosts webinars and in-person workshops for teachers and parents.
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Welcome to Tuesday Talks, your educational podcast helping parents become strong advocates for their kids and teachers to make big impacts in the classroom. Here we go. Hey, hey, welcome back, everybody. Thank you for joining me for another Tuesday Talks, where you know we are building powerful connections between home, school, and community. One conversation at a time. I don't take it lightly that you take time out to listen, to watch whatever platform you're on. I encourage you to share these episodes, whether you agree with what I'm saying or you disagree, share it to spark some conversation. That is the entire point of Tuesday Talks: to share information, spark conversation, spark innovation, maybe change some minds, maybe explore some new things that you weren't really into exploring before. So after the last episode, the one where I talked about my son leading his own conference and how that moment really shifted my perspective. I heard from so many teachers, parents, and administrators. It was amazing because I heard from people saying, Yes, our school needs this, or our school's already doing this, or my son's fifth grade class does this, or you know, I was able to have my child come into the conference for just a part of it. And it was so neat to hear them talk about their work. And I love that because I had that same experience too when I went to my son's student-led conference. I also heard from some other teacher parents and administrators who were like, um, no, we're not ready for this. This sounds like more work. Like, I already do enough, and this sounds like more work getting prepared for this. What if kids just walk out? What if I invite the kid? They don't say anything. What if kids aren't mature enough yet to do this? And honestly, both kinds of feedback matter. So, today's episode, I'm gonna explore both of those reactions, both very supportive ones, and those who are opposed to it, because real change requires listening. It requires dialoguing, it requires, you know, a community of thoughts coming together to find solutions that really honor everybody involved. Because what it looks like for one school, it might look not look like that in a different school. What it looks like in one grade level, it might not look like that in a different grade level. And if you've heard me say it once on Tuesday Talks, you've heard me say it a thousand times. This is not a cookie-cutter type situation. Education cannot be a cookie-cutter situation because we are dealing with kids who are very different within the same district, let alone across the country or across the state that you live in. So you tailor things to fit the kids that you see every day. That is exactly what I do as a speech therapist and what I've done over the almost two decades that I've done speech therapy. I don't approach every group, every classroom, every school the same way. You can't because they're different. We're dealing with humans. So I want you to come along with me as I revisit some of the social theory that we unpacked last episode, that exchange, cooperation, conflict, and accommodation, because those ideas are going to show up again in the feedback that I received as well. And if you're like, what social theory, please go back, watch last week's episode on giving kids the mic and giving them a voice in their conferences so that you have some background in that social theory, because in understanding that, then you'll see how it shows up in the feedback. And I'm gonna highlight it today, too. But last week's episode was Chef's Kiss. It was amazing. So go back and check it out. And by the end of today's episode, you're gonna walk away with practical ways to really respond to any skepticism that you may be facing if you pitch this idea to another teacher, to an administrator. You're also gonna walk away with practical ways to champion student voices and apply this model of student-led conferences, even if your whole school isn't on board, even if your whole grade level isn't on board. Because remember, you're meeting the needs of the kids in your classroom. You don't have to completely buck the system to the point where now, you know, administrators walking down asking you what the heck is going on. But you can insert some of these ideas to just tweak what you're already doing for these very important parent-teacher conferences. And if you're like, my conference is already passed, you're late, do it for the next conference. Think about it for the next one because they're gonna happen more than once in the school year. So think about the next one. So, first, I want to talk about the feedback from people who support student-led conferences. And I'm just gonna share some of their feedback that they gave, whether it was in comments, whether it was in direct messages, text messages. And so, this first feedback that I got was from a fifth grade teacher, and she said, you know, I've done student-led conferences for five years. My students take more ownership than ever. It forces them to reflect on their choices and their goals. And she said, I never go back, meaning I never go back to the old way of parent-teacher conferences, just being her and the parent. And of course, you already know what I'm gonna say about this. Absolutely, I am on board with it. Because when students step into the role of communicator, they move from compliance to ownership. Think about that. When they step into the role of communicator, when they are there and a part of this conference and showing their work, talking about their work, talking about their challenges, talking about their mood, talking about how they maybe don't even enjoy school. They move from that compliance piece to ownership and that reflection, that moment where the student says, Here's where I grew, here's where I'm stuck. That's transformational. It's not just academically emotional development, social development, maturity. It really is cooperation, and that comes from that social theory, where everyone at the table is working toward a shared benefit, a shared goal. And so giving kids that voice in the conference, even just in the comment that the teacher shared, she's really talking about that cooperation piece where everybody there is at the table talking about this shared benefit. And if a kid is saying, I'm stuck, that's huge. Maybe they're not able to explain what they fully mean by I'm stuck. It's just look, I'm stuck. But at least that gives you a launching pad to dig a little further, maybe look at, you know, work handed in a little differently, observe them a little bit more in just everyday classroom routines to kind of help them get to, you know, the bottom of what is stuck and help them, you know, get past that. So I also heard from an administrator from middle school, and they said some of our discipline issues went down after switching from student-led conferences. Kids take responsibility for their progress because they're a part of the conversation. And if you were a part of our conversation where I talk with Clarissa Hightower, who was a former middle school principal and also an associate superintendent, she said middle school is where you start to see a lot more discipline problems arise. You have all of the cognitive development that's happening, the social issues that kids run into, they're exploring more, their bodies are changing, their minds are changing, and discipline issues start to peak at that middle school level. And so for this administrator to say some of those discipline issues went down after switching to these student-led conferences, that is a huge advantage to using this model. Because when you include students, there's a power dynamic shift. And students stop feeling like things are going to be done to them, and they start feeling like they are participating in the process. That is empowerment. And empowered kids tend to make better choices because they feel ownership and not pressure to comply. They have this ownership piece. And just, you know, to be fully transparent, that is a huge part of what I wanted for my own son as I was thinking about, you know, what type of school I wanted him to go to, way back when he was a toddler. And I chose a school that honored that, that gave him choice, that helped him feel empowered. Of course, there have to be parameters, right? Like the kid just can't come into the student-led conference and just kick back and say all kind of off-the-wall, disrespectful stuff, maybe not tell the truth. We have parameters. And I'm going to talk about that later on in the episode. How to prep for this, how to train kids to prepare for these student-led conferences. Because that's a big piece, too. So just even in that administrator saying that discipline issues have gone down, it's empowering the kids who are able to speak up and have a voice in this conference to share how they feel about what they think is being done to them. And that gives you real insight. Um, one of the last quotes that came in was from a parent of a fourth grader. And this was some feedback she gave, just saying, hearing my daughter talk about her own learning was a game changer. So, mom of the fourth grader was part of the student-led conference, and she said it was a game changer hearing her daughter talk about her learning. She got to see her pride, her struggles, and also some of her maturity. And it felt like she was finally letting me into her school world, is what the parents said. And that is why student-led conferences matter. Students want to be a part of the conversation, but often they don't know how. So you might see acting out, you might see shutting down, you might see pulling away, you might see the kid throwing themselves into it and saying a whole lot of stuff that you didn't even know was going on. But when we give them the structure, the prompts, and that emotional safety, they shine. And this type of exchange, that reciprocal communication, it strengthens families, not just grades. And we all know if you've been in education for a minute or for decades, you know that it goes beyond grades. Impacting a child goes beyond grades. You can see a kid who is struggling every day, working hard just to be average, go on to do amazing things. And you can see straight A students go on to really struggle in older grades or in adult life. Like the grades matter as a point of data, but it goes beyond that. We are developing whole humans and teaching them that reciprocal communication, that type of exchange, which is a part of that social theory, it really helps to build up not just the student, but each person that that student touches, each person that is a part of their life, family, school, and community. All three parts are strengthened. And so I really loved hearing the positive feedback. I know I had my own positive feedback from my son's student-led conference and even shared a clip in the last episode from his conference. And I recorded it because I wanted him to be able to go back and hear what he said for goals, right? My son, you know, he loves to talk. And so I know sometimes I have to show him what he has said before to bring it back to the front of mind. So I recorded it so that if there is a moment where I feel like he's getting off track from what he set for his own goal, then I can here, here's the recording. Here's what you said about your plan. And I know goals can change, but I want to remind him of what he said he wanted before you know things got challenging, stuff got hard, goals weren't met, and maybe he's feeling discouraged. I want to remind him of what he said. So I shared a clip of it from his student-led conference in the last episode. So be sure to check that out. So now that we have talked about all the positive, supportive, you know, game-changing feedback that I got, I want to talk about the other side too, because that is just as meaningful. Because the change that we want to see, sometimes it brings on pushback. And that's not to say that one side is right or wrong. It's just to say that there's two sides to thing, it's two sides to the perspective on student-led conferences. So the concerns that I got were normal. I think they're valid and they deserve space. So definitely not dismissing them, but definitely addressing them. So one teacher, seventh grade, said, I already have too much on my plate. Preparing students for conferences feels like one more thing. And I have heard that from so many teachers, not specific to student-led conferences, but you know, new curriculum, a new way of working, a new after-school, you know, protocol, a new way to do lesson plans, a new way to, you know, attach, you know, state standards to your lesson plan. One more thing. Every year there's one more thing put on the plate. And I hear you, the teacher workload is real, and this model does take prep on the front end. Even teachers who reached out to me who said they made the shift said at first it was a lot. There was a lot of prep that had to happen, not just paperwork-wise, but prepping the student too. And I'm gonna talk about some ways that you can prep the student at the end of the episode. So be sure to stay tuned. But here's the truth the transition from student-led, from parent-led conferences, parent-teacher-led conferences, to student-led conferences, it's gonna be messy. There is no magic wand in this type of situation. It is going to take time to shift from what you've always done to something new. But what I've heard from teachers who have done it is that once students understand how to reflect on their learning, how to lead in these conferences, the preparation on the teachers' end, it decreases over time. So instead of you pulling all the data, you organizing all the talking points and you doing all the heavy lifting, students do it. The shift in this dynamic from teacher-centered to student-centered is actually less work in the long run. And if we're using that social lens, that social theory lens that I talked about, this is the accommodation piece, the bending, the adjusting, the making room for a more sustainable system. So thinking about it in that way, that yes, the front end is gonna require more prep, giving yourself space for it to be messy, being honest with the parents. Like, listen, we're trying this out. This is gonna be a little bumpy, it's gonna be a little messy, it might be a little janky, but we're doing this because there are some benefits that could come from it. And so I think if you open up space for there to be mistakes, for it not to be absolutely perfect, because you know, I've been a part of those parent-teacher conferences, both on the educator side and on the parent side. And you know, the teacher comes with everything already laid out. You have your talking points, you have your data, you have your work samples, you have everything right there. And in doing that, everything runs smoothly. You are on a timetable, right? 15, 20 minutes, tops, everything runs smoothly. And so to transition from what you know works to what you aren't really sure might work, it might not work, can be very jarring. It can bring on some anxiety. But giving yourself space to know, okay, this might be a little messy and being honest about it up front, I think opens up some grace there on both sides for yourself as the educator and then on the student and the parent side as well. Um, another parent of a second grader wrote in and said, you know, my child is shy. I don't want them to feel embarrassed or pressured in this type of student-led conference. I don't think that they're gonna say much and probably withdraw even more. And so, yes, that can happen. And that's why you scaffold the experience. A student-led conference doesn't have to be stand up and present your whole life story. Stand up, tell me everything that you've done in class up until this point. It can be share one thing you're proud of. Tell us one goal you're working on. This helps build confidence, not fear. It's slow, it's compassionate, and it's this entry into self-advocacy instead of performance. It's not performative. It really is this self-advocacy piece and prepping students ahead of the conference is what lends it this whole model to it being a more natural type of conversation. So, really giving kids that opportunity, whether they're shy or more reserved, to share that one thing that they're proud of or one goal that they want to work on, or that they have been working on, that is where you can pull more reserved kids into the conversation, give them preparation. Some kids need that, they need to know exactly what I'm gonna be asked ahead of time so that they can be prepared in the moment. So they can think about what they want to say, craft it out, whether it's written, maybe it's just in their head, so that they can show up in the conference in a confident way. So consider that. Another administrator reached out saying parents expect traditional conferences. They want to see data, they want to see work samples, they want to know what I've done to, as a teacher, to help intervene and improve things. And the principal was worried that parents might think this new approach is less formal and less informative. And for me, I see this as a communication issue, not a conference issue. And what I mean by that is that when schools explain the purpose, outline the benefits, prepare families, parents overwhelmingly respond positively. It's that preparation. Exactly what I just talked about about this, the shy, reserved students needs that prep. Parents need prep too. I know on my end, don't have me walking into school and I am not aware of how something that is very meaningful is is has shifted. You would catch me off guard and I'll be like, okay, I wasn't prepared for that. That's my personality. I like to know what I'm getting into. And so if you can prepare me and give me some insight ahead of time, then I'm able to adjust myself mentally, emotionally, and adjust my expectations. Because student-led does not mean less professional, it means more personal, more transparent, more accurate. Remember, conflict in social theory isn't bad. It simply signals opposing expectation. And clear communication turns conflict into cooperation. So we're shifting the needle there in that social theory hierarchy. So think about it in those terms. And I feel like that would help you navigate some of the angst that you might feel from parents. And I'm gonna talk about some ways to kind of do a hybrid type of approach. Maybe you're not ready to go fully into student-led conferences. It takes time, it takes preparation on the students' end, the teachers in, the administrators in, and on the parent side as well. So when I when I got that feedback, that is what that made me think about like if parents are feeling like this is going to be less informative, then really I feel like they're not being communicated to in a way that helps them understand the benefits of a student-led conference, whether it is in whole or in part. So thinking about navigating pushback, strengthening any buy-in, I wanted to share some ways that schools can respond to concerns while still moving forward towards student-led conferences. So starting small. And remember, I'm gonna share some practical ways, but remember, this is not a cookie-cutter type situation. You take this information, you tweak it to fit who you are teaching, the families you are engaging with, right? So keep that in mind. But starting small, pilot just one grade, pilot one department, and then gather success stories to help build momentum. Take feedback that was maybe negative or some pushback and turn that into a movement towards resolution, towards finding solutions. Because there's always going to be someone or a group of people who can give you a laundry list of reasons why something won't work. But take that feedback and instead of just dismissing it or letting it turn the tide and just say, you know what, we have too many opposing ideas, let's just not do it at all. Take all of the feedback, the positive and the constructive, and turn that into momentum to build on so that it can be tweaked differently for the next time that you have these student-led conferences. Also providing clear scripts and structure. If you have shy students, you have anxious students, scripted sentence starters and reflection slips can be lifesavers. I just talked about that with a parent who said, like, my kid is gonna withdraw more. We're putting them on the spot. They don't like that. Giving them those scripted sentence starters and those reflection strips or slips are lifesavers. And again, teachers saying, This is one more thing. This is one more thing that I have to do. This is prep. Remember, there's a lot to be done on the front end that after some time of the students taking ownership of these conferences, then it becomes less work on the back end, right? Once you get these sentence starters going, once you've printed them out, come up with them, you're handing them out, you're tweaking them a little bit for students based on their personality. And those can really be lifesavers, not only for you as the teacher, so that you know you have some input from students, but also for the students themselves. And remember, they're at the center of this. So we need them to feel as comfortable as possible in this setup of student-led conferences so that it could be successful, it can be informative. And I say successful, but successful doesn't mean that everything at the end is all wrapped up, tied nicely with the bow. It means that you have a direction from the kid who's like, I'm stuck, I don't know what to do. Or you know what? I really don't even want to be here. Because you're gonna get input from students that is real. If nothing else, especially middle schoolers, they will tell it exactly how it is. But that gives you a launching pad to know how to approach, where to redirect, where to motivate. That's informative. Another practical way to start to respond to concerns while still moving forward with the student-led conferences is to offer hybrid models. Like if you're not ready for full student-led conferences, try student presence instead. 10 minutes at the end of the conference to share a goal. You start off with parent and teacher. The student comes in at the end to share a goal, something they're proud of, maybe something that they're not so proud of, um, something that they want to work on for the next grading period. Student presence can be a way to kind of bridge the traditional parent-student parent-teacher conference to student-led conferences. And again, if you're hearing me and you're thinking, I know some of my students are gonna come in here and not say anything. Some are just gonna walk out. Then that is an opportunity for you as the educator to speak with the parent. Okay, so listen, we have a we have a kid who is not engaged, who doesn't care, who is very verbal and vocal about it. Here is a chance for you as the educator to impart some education, some strategies onto the parent. Listen, I've seen this with other students, and this is what other parents have tried. This is what you and I can collaborate on, another part of that social theory, that collaboration piece. You and I can collaborate on this to maybe help get them engaged in one area of school or education. So think about it like that. If you're thinking of students that this won't work for, what opening does that give for you as the educator to build a stronger bond with the parent or the family to help the student in the end? So kind of reshape your perspective in that way. Um, another practical strategy here is training students early, weekly reflections, weekly, maybe Friday goal check-ins, self-assessments in the form of a Google form, something where students are getting trained early on. And this is gonna create a conference that becomes a natural extension of what they already do. They're already used to coming to you on a weekly basis, maybe a bi-weekly basis as their teacher to say, this is where I need to do better, this is where I'm on track, and this is how I'm gonna make a change. If they're already used to coming to you as their teacher with that information, then a student-led conference or even a student presence conference is just a natural extension of what they're already doing. So if you're thinking about students not knowing what to do in these situations where they're put at center for these conferences, not knowing how to speak up for themselves, then I would encourage you to reflect on how you are giving them the opportunity to do these things in your classroom. That's all you can control. You can't control what's going on at home, right? How are you giving them opportunities to have a voice in your classroom? And then all you're doing is transitioning that voice into a conference situation. And lastly, talking about data, you know, schools love data, it has its place, definitely, but then also there's always a story behind the numbers, right? I can give you percentages and we can find ways that that percentage has been skewed, how that data has been skewed based on, you know, where it was collected, who responded, how they responded. And so numbers have a place, but I don't want us to rest just on data because there's always a story behind it. So just in my research for the show, there were research um studies that showed 20% reduction in discipline referrals, 25 to 30 percent higher goal completion, increased parent satisfaction, increased student satisfaction. So data definitely builds credibility, especially for hesitant administrators. If you're a teacher thinking this would be great, but my administrator is gonna want to see some data. There's data out there to be collected. Just know that any percentage, any increase or decrease that you see in a research study, there is a story behind it. So be sure to pull that in as well because you want to set realistic expectations. Like the middle school administrator that I talked about at the top of the show, who was very supportive and said, Hey, I've seen some decrease in student discipline referrals in my school. It wasn't a fix-all that every discipline problem that was happening disappeared once we shifted to student-led conferences. No. But there was some change, some positive change. And so that should be celebrated. And if there isn't any change, if there is, you know, some plateau that's going on, maybe you see things get worse, then digging deeper to figure out what occurred that maybe swung things in a negative direction. So starting small, providing clear scripts, going with a hybrid model, training students early, using data, these are all ways that schools can respond to any concerns with transitioning to these student led conferences while still building up student voices to be at the center of these conferences because. Truly, that is what makes a difference in student learning when they feel empowered, when they feel as though their voice matters, and they know that they're being held accountable for their learning. Because the reality is this any shift that centers student voice will bring both excitement and resistance. Both of those things can come from parents, from administrators, from teachers, from the kid themselves. But student-led conferences, it's more than a trend. It really is a movement towards building student agency, family collaboration, and transparent learning. And I think that last piece really goes a long way with getting parents to buy into this as well. And when we move through the social interaction cycle from conflict to accommodation to cooperation, we build systems that honor everybody involved. So whether you're a parent, a teacher, an administrator, I encourage you to try one small step. Invite students into the conversation, even if it's for five minutes, even if it's just to share one goal, even if it's just to share one struggle. Because when students speak, we all learn something new. And I really want you to hold on to that as a that North Star. When students speak, we all learn something new. And don't we want to hear from the person who can teach us something new that helps us tap into them in a different and more meaningful way? Thank you so much for joining me for another episode of Tuesday Talks. If you're following me on Instagram, it's at Dr. Tiffany SLP. I have more communication goodies, more educational thoughts and talks. And remember, when students find their voice, everyone learns to listen better. Thank you again for joining me. Thank you for all the feedback that I got from the last episode of transitioning from parent-teacher conferences to student-led conferences. I love the back and forth because that helps us grow. That helped me see some things that maybe I didn't consider. It helped maybe others learn something new that they hadn't considered as well. So thank you again. Be sure to share this episode with friends, colleagues, family members. Like it, you know, send me comments. Let me know how this has resonated with you, positively or negatively. I take it all constructively. And let's just continue to strive and grow better. Remember, this is all for bringing together families, community, schools. That is what we're doing here on Tuesday Talks. So I thank you so much for taking time out to join me for this week's episode. Be sure to check out every episode every week. I'll be right here. So I'll see you. Be sure to share this episode and join me next week for our brand new Tuesday Talks. See ya.