Empaths Anonymous

Self-Care for High Achievers and SILKENN's Community Centered Skincare with Ericka Parker

• Crystina Rowntree and Danielle Lamadrid • Season 2 • Episode 34

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Hello feelers, loves, and friends! Welcome to our final week of January Wellness Reset!

We have the very lovely, smart, entrepreneurial Ericka Parker of Boss Babe Reset podcast on this week to talk all things:
🛁 self-care, 
🧴 Ericka's journey to founding SILKENN skincare
💸 VP funding for female owned businesses
 🌿 environmental skin aggressors and the skin microbiome

 You won't want to miss it!

After earning a BS in forensic science and pre-medicine, Ericka took a chance and quit her career in forensics to build her own luxury skincare brand Silkenn. She then wanted to expand the intent and meaning of SILKENN into podcasting, curating conversations about self care on her podcast Boss Babe Reset

Ericka's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theerickanicole/
SILKENN's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/silkennco/
SILKENN website: https://www.silkennco.com/
Boss Babe Reset podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/boss-babe-reset-self-care-hacks-for-high-achievers/id1695940812

00:00 Welcome back and What's In Your Cup!?
01:24 News Flash: We're still not done talking about the Wicked Movie
02:25 January Check in: How are you doing with your goals?
06:17 Introducing Ericka Nicole Parker
08:03 Self Care for Black and Brown Folks. What is that!? 😅
13:18 Starting an INCLUSIVE skincare line mama
16:58 Environmental factors, the microbiome and how they affect your skin
19:32 SILKENN as a community based skincare line
24:26 The truth about VP funding for female owned brands and businesses
27:38 Prioritizing self-care for the busy boss babes
32:16 Self-care is not a luxury, it is a necessity!
37:12 SILKENN skincare launch
39:25 Closing takeaways and saying ADIOS!!

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Intro music by Heet Deth

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Self care I think is really about being extremely intentional about yourself mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically so that you can operate as your best self, whatever that is for that day. And it requires being a little selfish. I know people hate to hear that word, but you have to be selfish with yourself because if you're not selfish with you, you're going to sacrifice yourself which is actually worse.

Speaker:

Welcome to Empaths Anonymous,

Speaker 2:

a space for dreamers, healers, and feelers, navigating the fine line between putting yourself first and holding space for others.

Speaker:

If you struggle with balancing your needs while still supporting your tribe, then you're in the right place.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the support group.

ea_3_01-07-2025_152401:

Hello and welcome back to Empaths Anonymous podcast. I'm Crystina. I'm Danie. And we probably look a little familiar from last week. And that is because for most of our January episodes, except for one, we prerecorded them so that we would be set for the year. Because it would be a lot to record and edit and publish four episodes for our January wellness reset. For the new year. Yes. It allowed us to take the break that we did. Exactly. So, we look similar to last week. We're coming at you from the future. But we are going to recap the past. So, before I get into that, what's in your cup today? It's water! Wow! Woo Always and forever in the Elphaba Cup. Because it's still very wicked. Yeah, it's still very much a wicked house as it will be for a long periodically time. You know, I mentioned this in last week's episode that we bought the film. However, we failed to watch the deleted scenes. We need to do that. And I'm like, hello, that's literally why I bought it. TikTok is in an uproar. Yes. Because they deleted so many character development scenes. They did. And that's what's in my emotional cup today. Yeah. Ariana is trying to get John, hopefully by the time, maybe by the time this episode comes out, we do get a little glimpse, but he deleted a lot of the, what is it called? B roll. Of all the friends together. So Bach and Vanessa, Glinda, Fiero, Elphaba, frolicking, having fun, being friends, they deleted all of those scenes. And while I understand why it's already a really long movie, I think that it would have cemented the fact that they were such close friends because it kind of goes from we were enemies to then all of a sudden we're besties. Cause we're dancing. Yeah. There are some holes. Right. There also was another deleted scene. I haven't. Watched it all, but I saw a little bit of it on tick tock. And it's basically after the poppy scene and Glinda tells Elphaba, like, you know, like you could have relied on me to like, next time I'll come with you, which makes the train set scene make more sense when she says I'm coming with you. Yeah. Would have loved that to be in the film. And Elphaba being like, I'm inviting you to come on this journey and this time you have to say yes, because you already told me, but we didn't know that because it's Gwyneth's turn in the film. Exactly. But yeah, I, this being the last episode of January by the time you all hear this, We made it through We gonna be all right. We won't be all right Seeing as the second week was our dry January episode Let us know how that went for you. Did you opt in for dry January? Did you not? How did that go? What different choices? Did you make? How did your First month of the year go? Yeah Because it's been a really difficult uh, heavy wellness month. And so there's different things that we're doing here in this household as well. Like I noticed that we're cutting back a lot on the sweets. I went to Trader Joe's the other day and I didn't get the mini chocolate chip cookies, which if you know, you know, the crunchy ones. So we're making different choices around here and I'm proud. Yeah. Those are immediate, like drive by with a handful, you know, it's so hard to resist. Also, those little Rice Krispie squares that I love. I didn't even look. I had the thought, but I was like, I'm not going to look, and you want to know why. It's because I feel like they changed the recipe the last time you got them. You were disappointed. Yeah, you're right. So I'm like, what's the point? You are right. That did happen last time. I'm not going to get them. That did happen. Yep. Yeah. I also am drinking water today out of my, what is this one called? It's not an awala. L O and L O, L O, L O, L O, L O V E. Ashley Simpson, Deep Cut. Do you remember that one? I do. It took me a minute. But I do remember it. I had that CD. Yeah. I had the compact disc. Pieces of me. Pieces. Pieces. I think I've said this before. Pieces. But I my town had a local AmErickan Idol and I sang it there for the audition. Ooh. Pieces. I think I was like 11. I don't remember how old I was. Pieces of me. Exactly. On a Monday. Like girl, maybe she needs to do dry January. Yeah, she's kind of crazy. Yeah, I'm just January is I mean we said it in the episode with Jamie. It's rocket ship. So a lot of things are just coming through for me business wise Finance wise or some things happening that have been in the works for a while and I'm just tootling my little ass along You know tootle bit trusting the universe Calling in some great people into my life to kind of be part of this new chapter and I'm loving it. Mm hmm I can't really speak to what's happening with school But by the time this episode comes out, I would have been two weeks in school And I think I mentioned this before I have a heavier load Credits wise so I will check back in with you in February and let you know where I am with that. Yeah, that's true Yeah, yeah Yeah doing lots of fun stuff for the pod for our personal lives. We have As always, an amazing guest lineup for you guys for the last week of January. However, fun and exciting news. Our guest had a full and complete rebrand at the beginning of this year, which at the time of the recording, she was still under her old brand and podcast name, which was Behind the Silk. And so that's how we introduce her as our guest today. And that is Miss Ericka Nicole. But now, which we will link in the show notes. But now she goes by Boss Babe Reset and it's a whole new pod art. It's obviously the same concept behind the podcast, but it's so lovely and of course we'll link it. So we want you guys to check it out, but there might be some confusion there when we introduce her as behind the silk and you're like, where's behind the silk? It is. Boss babe reset now, which we're we love a rebrand. Honestly. We love the colors the branding everything I'm i'm really loving it. So congrats to you Ericka and without further ado, let's get into it

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Today we have the very well accomplished, the very lovely Miss Ericka Nicole, on the podcast. After earning a bachelor's in science and forensic science and pre medicine, Erika took a chance and quit her career in forensics to build her own luxury skincare brand called SILKENN. She then wanted to expand the intent and meaning of SILKENN into podcasting, curating conversations about self care on her podcast, Behind the Silk. So we want to welcome and thank Erika for coming on the podcast.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Thank you for having me that was such a good intro

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Thank you so much. We do what we can. Yeah, vocal warm ups. Um, so the, one of the first things we ask our guests when we have them on is, what is in your cup today? Do you, what did you bring in your physical cup? What are you drinking on? What are you sipping on? And what are you bringing to the podcast today? How are you showing up as your full self?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

So I was extremely thirsty before we started recording, but I did have a, uh, Ollipop root beer that is currently finished, but it was really, really good. That's like a testament to that. And what I hope to bring today, I don't know, some motivation. I feel like the month of November has been very heavy for many reasons. So just some light, some positivity, motivation, all the good vibes.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, of course. Agreed. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So we are doing our January wellness reset month. So we thought that it would be a great time to talk about self care for black and Brown folks and the fact that we just don't, uh, not ever. We rarely have brands that are catering to us and to our skin and to our self care. So we wanted to have you on and just kind of explore more of that. just in the world of self care, I feel like the last two years that's been like such a, I don't want to say hot button, but like, it's been a focus trend. A buzzword. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Which I'm glad that we're finally here. but we've noticed this trend of like attempting to have a. routine and balance life's priorities with fitting into your self care routine. How do we simplify this and break it down so that it makes sense to us?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah, so I, I always put it out there, like the word balance is absolutely a myth, right? It's something that's very, most likely unattainable. So instead of the word balance, I like to think of it as trade offs, right? Like you're always going to be trading something for something. Whether it's your time, it's your self care, it's your mental well being. Life Um, but I do think routines are extremely important, especially as we go into some of these colder months. You know, seasonal depression is a thing. It's getting darker earlier. So having a routine and something that kind of keeps you grounded, I think is like a super major key to kind of keep you on track. But yeah, self care has been super buzzwordy, and I So many thoughts about that because self care is so much more than just a bubble bath and a face mask. Although we love those things, absolutely. But it just goes so much deeper than that. Uh,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

routine before you're 9 to 5. I'm like, well, that is so awesome if that works for other people. It may not work for everybody. I don't think we should all be attaining to have this exact same self care routine because then it's not really making it our own. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

to, I have had to become that 5am gym girlier. I was like, I cannot work out after work. Like I will find every excuse not to work out. Like I got caught at a red light. I tripped on, on the concrete walking to my car. Like I just, I will find every excuse not to go But beforehand I used to go to gym on my lunchtime and that was like my prime time thing. Cause I love a good midday workout. I like. Super productive morning, take a step away from my laptop, go do some nice cardio, strength training, shower, come back and like another power session. But that's the thing, like self care has to be customizable, it has to be catered to your lifestyle. Our lifestyles change, like we go through different seasons in life and just finding those little moments of things that bring us joy because you have to find your thing, right? For some people it's not working out, for some people it's, it's skin care and listening to music while they do their shower routine like, you have to find what works for you.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yes, exactly. I think that if you are, like what you said, if the only option is for you to build up a habit, That is someone going to the gym really early in the morning before your regular work schedule Then I think anyone can build up a habit, especially if it's something that's very important to you but that's so funny is like I also struggle to work out after a full day of doing things So it's like any minor inconvenience where i'm like, oh no Like I I can't do that because such and such happened instead. I I deserve a treat And so I will go do the exact opposite of workout and go get myself a treat, which is not always a bad thing. I think we can indulge a little bit, but, I like the idea of kind of, putting this idea of balance to the wayside and really understanding like what the trade off actually is for each of us.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah. And not feeling guilty about it.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

correct, yes, the guilt part really,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Mm

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

at us for sure. That's the hardest part though. That's, I mean, for me at least, I struggle with is like if I don't, I like that you said trade offs because I kind of will do that in my mind. Like if I don't get to the gym, I'm like, ugh, I get so down on myself. I'm like, okay, well fine, if I don't go to the gym tonight, I'll make sure that I get up. Early and like go on a walk tomorrow in the morning before I start work or whatever So kind of having these like negotiations with myself Which I think it's it's good to kind of like pivot and create a different plan But also i'm like, why do I get so like down on myself? It's like it's one day It doesn't define who I am. It doesn't define the rest of my week like I can get back on it I don't have to keep you know, punching myself down because one day didn't work out the way that I wanted And

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

let, like, one incident roll in from, like, just a bad day, to a bad week, to a bad month, and then, like, it's like, well, dang, I haven't, I haven't gone on a walk in three months. Like, what is happening? Like, you know, cause I ate that one cookie three months ago when I shouldn't have. You know, it's like, girl, stop

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Right. Yeah, we let things like sabotage our experience. I'm like, we're just humans, y'all. Like, yeah, it's really not that serious, but I think it can be a mental block.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

yeah.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Mm hmm. I really can. So, We are so excited for SILKENN. So we really want to get into your I guess push to quit your previous job and really explore this idea of skincare for black and brown folks. So I guess ultimately we wanted to ask why did you choose to start a skincare line?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Oh, that is a great question. I don't know if I should give like the summarized answer or like the,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

However you,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll give you like the, the overall story time, right?

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, dive in. Yeah,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

background is forensics and pre med. And that's why I decided to do post grad. I started working in toxicology. And it was, it was cute. Wanted it to be like watching all the shows the law and order. I'm like, oh,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Mm hmm.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

So I spent two years doing crime scene toxicology and I remember one day one of my co workers came in and just did something I don't even fully remember what it was but they just pissed me off and I remember going into my car and calling my husband while my boyfriend then now husband and I Was like I cannot do this anymore. Like I I'm going to quit and I am a little bit more of the You know emotional impulsive one. So when I got in the car, I thought he was gonna be like, you know, babe relax We'll talk about when you get home No, that is not what happened. He was just like, okay cool. And I was like Clutch my pearls. What? Like,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Excuse me? Aren't you

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

is not right. You're supposed to

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

right. You're supposed to be the rational

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Right.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

So, I left, I literally went in the next day, put in my two weeks. And I was like, I just really want to travel. Like it was a very rough kind of season for me. A lot of family things going on. I was making this big, big pivot in my career. And like, this is the career I had wanted since I was nine years old. Like from nine years old, I knew I wanted to be in forensics. And I'm like, I spent my whole life working to this goal. It's not what I thought it was going to be. I call it my Eat, Pray, Love journey. And I spent all of the end of 2019, those six months just traveling. Like re exploring my passions, my likes, my dislikes. I was opening up and the timing was great because we didn't know 2020 was around the corner. So 2019, so grateful, so grateful.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yes. I know. Yeah, we all look back to 2019 as like, I miss you girl. We

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Right, the outside year.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

was All over the Caribbean, the U. S., I was in Europe. It was such a time and I've always had acne and eczema, and I realized that my skin was flaring up in different environments. Because I'd be in the Caribbean, and like, my skin glowing, thriving, sunlight, ocean water, it was great. I would come back to the city, and it's like,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

What, what happened? Like, how did, how did we get here? So, I put my expensive ass degree, I don't know if I can curse on here, my expensive degree to use, and started doing all of this, okay, great, due diligence on pollution and skin health and the microbiome, and I was like, this is it. This is a thing. Like this is actually an issue. And that's where I've spent all of my time. So we've been in R and D product development. We are expecting a fall 2025 launch of all goes according to plan. We're going through clinical trials and all the things right now. So that is how we ended up in skincare, uh, a quitting of a job, a travel and a falling back on my, or repurposing of my degree.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Exactly. I mean, isn't that how some of the best. Things come about in our life is like we think that we wanted one thing And it really wasn't for us. So we just kind of trust You know our instincts so we just say i'm just gonna leave that i'm gonna You know be fun and fancy free and travel the world and eat my have my eat my pray eat my pray Have my eat pray love moment and then this Just naturally kind of like falls in your lap of like, hey, this is my experience My skin's this way one place this way another place, which I totally relate to I my parents live in wisconsin and they have like well water, but we live in california. So there's like There's shit in our water, Right. Yeah. So I notice when I'm there my skin's amazing And then I come back here and it's like two weeks and my skin is dry and my pores are clogged I'm like girl, what is going on? So I'm really excited for your line because I know that environmental factors just have so much to do with our skin

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

They do and we don't realize it because it's so subtle and if you're not really bouncing around or if you're really sedentary in one Place you think that's just how it is and it's like no like there's something to this Like I've had many friends come from like the south even or like from other countries and they come to New York and like their Hair like they have curly hair and it's just like they're like what is happening. My curls are not popping They're so dry. My hair is breaking off. I'm like girl. It's that New York City water, baby. I don't know. It's the calcium It's the It's the air. It's the everything. It's the smog. It's different.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

So you talked about the microbiome and I know that there's the gut microbiome and then there's the skin microbiome, right? How does that affect our skin and like how are how do products kind of play into that?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah, so much. So in like the most basic sense, your microbiome is like the balance of good and bad bacteria. And when we have these environmental stressors that throw off that balance, our skin tends to go a little haywire. And the biggest thing that we see when our skin microbiome is off is either inflammation. So like your acne, your eczema psoriasis, or or we'll see a lot of dryness. So your skin is very dehydrated. And I think a lot of people missed that. Like again, like we're very educated on the gut microbiome, like kombucha, your teas, like all that is like at an all time high. But understanding that there's also a balance of your microbiome on your skin is equally as important and it doesn't get enough limelight. And that makes me sad for her. So we're also here to address that as well. Oh,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

I love that. Yeah. We never really hear about that. Never. Yeah. Like when you said I was like, oh, it makes sense, but it's just not at the forefront. You think microbiome, you immediately go to gut for sure. So that is very interesting. I have struggled with hormonal acne in the past, like my early twenties. Of course the dermatologist recommended me an antibiotic. And so that happened for a little while. Then I realized I, was probably dealing with a little bit of a hormonal imbalance. So I actually tried like topical progesterone, like applying it like to different areas of my body. It was like a plant based progesterone, and so that seemed to actually help a lot more than the antibiotics did, to be honest. And so, uh, we, Love that that's what you explored, especially still being in kind of like this research and development phase looking for a fall 2025 launch, but could you dive a little bit deeper into the intention behind SILKENN skincare outside of like what the product is, right? Like, how do you want to feel when you use it?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah, so outside of being a pollution protection skin care brand, like SILKENN is very community based and that's why I'm really, really excited as we're kind of leaning up to this launch. In fall, we have a lot of activations happening, a lot of mini events, like really getting to understand what people's pain points are because think about it for the longest. I thought I was the only person that was affected by environmental stressors and their skin health. And then as you begin to have these conversations, you realize people are like, Oh my gosh, me too. Like, Oh my gosh, I thought it was just me. And they were like, there's a community aspect. to it that I think is often overlooked. So being able to have these events and have these feedbacks these feedback conversations are also extremely important. But then the other big thing about this is diversity, you know, like, I forgot the stab and I don't want to misquote it, but I think it's less than 20 percent of all skincare products are actually tested on melanated skin. And that's something that was extremely important for us going into clinicals. Like we need a diverse range of skin care. Skin tones and types for us to make these claims that we're saying. So that has been a very, and, and using, we use the black laboratory, like the lab that we use as black female owned as well.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Okay.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

and So so you know that all being a part of like what our values are. So yes, we have the pollution protection, the sustain sustainability, and the cruelty free and the clean, like all these bud buzz words that are used in the beauty industry, but being very. community centered, being very people centered is literally the heart of our mission. Yeah.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

to using a product. When you know that there is care and love and an actual intention behind creating something and it's not just like, give me your dollar it makes you feel really good to give you your dollar. Right? Right. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Somebody who has put the time and the care into it. I think that I kind of have like a distrust of brands, especially like celebrity brands, cause I'm like, everybody's coming out with a makeup line or a skincare line or a

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Don't get me started on the celebrity brands. That can be a whole separate episode of a rant. Like,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

should do that as an episode. That'd be such a good episode on your podcast. yeah. but I know like I, and I want to support everybody. Like I love Tracy Ellis Ross. I love Issa, you know? So it's like, I want to try their products. I love Beyonce. I want to try Cecred, but I'm like, how much of this is actually like intentional? Not saying that no dig to any of them. I love all of these women, but I'm like, sometimes it just feels like there's a disconnect between the consumer and the person. And I really just love getting to connect with people like your story where like you had this experience yourself and so you wanted to create something for the whole community.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Thank you again. I think part of it is just like we're tired of being sold to, right? Like we are in like this overhaul of just products, you know, and I think TikTok has amplified that times a million, you know, like TikTok shop, although we love it as a revenue stream, as a distribution channel, you know, we're we constantly have products. It's being shoved at us and we're constantly being sold to so like it's, yes, like we want to know like the intention behind building a brand, but it's also like doing the due diligence. Like I think I'm one of, I could be one of the few people who literally like Google ingredient lists. Like I am putting an ingredient list in the chat GPT and I'm asking like, what are the benefits? I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm going deep. You know, and I think it's also put us into this culture of thinking that we need like a 10 step skincare routine, makeup routine, hair care routine. And it's like, the more simple your routine is, the better. If you are using 10 products, you don't know what's working. You don't know what's not working. Like you, you don't have any data points to go off of. So like, how necessary is that really, you know?

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Right. Right. I know, the simpler I get with it, the better my skin is. I'm like, I'm gonna do my retinol at night with my moisturizer, and then in the daytime I'm gonna do like a hyaluronic acid and my moisturizer, sunscreen, and call it a day. And my skin thrives.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I'm so glad you mentioned sunscreen because I feel like that's a whole nother myth within like black culture We just don't believe in sunscreen. So when I hear somebody say it, I'm like, thank you, please

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yes. Yes. Yes. you, have to wear it. Even The same with like a darker, uh, complexion, uh, Latinos and Latinas, they feel similarly to it. Whereas, like, I don't, I don't need that. Like, I just tan. I don't burn. Like, it's less about the burn, babe, and more about the cancer. The cancer of it all. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

rays,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

yeah, and just continuing to educate and saying this isn't necessarily Negate the fact that you have beautiful melanin. That's not what we're saying, but you should protect it, right? Because it's like, at the end of the day, your skin is your skin. You have to love on it. So yeah, I'm a firm believer in sunscreen. My daughter's half black and I got black girl sunscreen for her because you know, the white cast is a thing. I get it Yeah. Yeah, and so I want her to feel like confident going to the pool and you know, but she's also protected, right? Like she's not gonna be like the little Casper

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Ha Ha ha ha, right.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

But I know that I'm taking care of her skin so yeah, I'm a firm believer in sunscreen We love that you are such a go getter and you have such this entrepreneurial spirit. And I did notice when I was doing some research that you have been going out and getting funding for your brand. So we wanted to ask what your experience has been like with this because From some of my own background experience with like, uh, another job that I had, I was representing somebody who was in law. And she told me that only 2 percent of women that are receiving, no, only let me get my facts right. Only 2 percent of businesses that are capital funded are owned by women. So I just wanted to ask your experience with that and like how it has been getting funding for SILKENN.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I feel like I need a stronger drink for that one. It

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Spike your

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

like at this point. Yeah. It is honestly a journey, you know, because what you're saying is absolutely true. Like less than 2 percent of female owned companies get B. C. And I think it's less than less than 0. 2 percent actually make it to an exit to reap the benefits of all their hard work. So it's rough out there, you know, like being a woman is one thing. And then those stats are a lot. Lower for women of color. That's just the reality so it really is like you have to be three times as good to qualify for half of what they think that you're worth and it's hard to explain, you know Raising pre seed is probably one of the hardest rounds that you can raise because you don't have any traction yet You know, like you don't really have much to prove That your business is going to be successful. So they're really investing in you and your vision and your team. And I think I'm just so grateful that up until this point I've been able to assemble a kick ass team. And that is honestly like just by God's grace and like putting me in the right space at the right time to facilitate these relationships. So yeah, we're officially opening our round, uh, beginning of next year. But we've been making some very big strides in relationship building and making sure that we have all the groundwork that we can qualify for a raise. Because I think it's also important to note that not every business is venture backable. And there's a lot of responsibility that comes with raising capital. Like these VCs, they want a 10x return. So if you cannot 10x these people's money in the next five to seven years, then honey, unfortunately, you may just want to stay a lifestyle business and you may not want to raise. And that's just the reality. There's a lot of pressures that come to it and people think that because you're a ceo You're like this boss and that's great but like everyone reports to somebody as a ceo raising capital like I report to My advisory board and I report to my firms who have lent me money And they have to report to their lps and to their investors. So like everyone reports to somebody So I think that's important to remember. But if you think that your business is worth it and you're ready to take it on, it's definitely something I encourage because we need to get more female founders funded and that is 100 percent necessary.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, absolutely. It's not like they're just like handing you money like, Okay, here, go have fun. Right. So that's a great point to make is like the work doesn't stop at getting the money.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Right, it actually gets much harder after that. Because how do I 10x this? Right,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

me, yeah. Show me the money. Okay. Give it back to me. Yes. So speaking to, you mentioned that you're back in the office. So that's a piece of information we did not know. So that now, that now adds to this question, how do you prioritize your own personal self care in the midst of balancing everything that you have happening in both your professional and personal life?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah, I don't. Like I said, balance. It's, I

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Right. Yeah,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

it's, it's, it's truly a series of trade offs, you know, like still having a nine to five because again, we're still trying to close this round, you know, that is, we need to keep the lights on, You know, and still having the business that we're doing. I mean, leading a team in the business, not just having a business, but leading that team and having the podcast and, you know, trying to be a wife and a daughter and all these other things. It's a lot of responsibility. So I think the saving grace for me has been communication. Even my friend, just understanding where I am right now, my husband, Been is amazing and understanding when, when I just don't have the capacity or when I just don't have it in me and is willing to jump in at any time. So your community and being able to communicate with people around you, I think is just like top tier for kind of just making it through.'cause I may not wanna go out tonight, you know, we used to go out every Friday night or Saturday night, and now going out may look like a Netflix and wine on the couch because I just don't, I just cannot be around people right now. I just don't have it in me. So it's communicating your needs and where you are and. The people around you who are really for you will understand.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Yes, exactly. I love that. Yeah. I feel like we rarely look at, like, communication as part of self care, so that's a really good point to make. That's true.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

It even happened to me this Saturday my friend We hadn't literally made plans to go out and I'm one of those persons where like one of those persons one of those people Well, I will make plans but if you do not follow up with a text message, like hey, are we still going out? I'm not gonna text you and ask

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Exactly.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I'm just gonna assume it's not happening, right?

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

it's funny cuz we had texted each other I like 10 o'clock and it was like so I guess we're mutually agreed that we're not going out tonight and I was like exactly

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Thank you.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yep

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Thanks for your understanding. Love you so much. Talk to you

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Talk to you later.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yes. Yeah, we love friends like that who are like, just, you may have made plans earlier in the week when the fuller energy you was like, yes, like, I can't wait, gotta check out the spa, blah, blah, blah, and then like, end of the week you was like, absolutely not, and then your friend will not. Meet you with that judgment because they're in the exact same spot and they're just like yeah, it's gonna be a different time It's not

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Right.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, which I think is great. I am so guilty of that. I do that all of the time Unfortunately, i've just started to now like not Pack my schedule as much because I know That the me when it comes time for the plans is a mid girl. Why did you do that?

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Mm-hmm And I'm an over committer too. Like I'm definitely, there's still an essence of people pleasing and it's like, ugh. Like let me just like suck it up and do it. And then other times it's just like, mm mm, mm mm mm. And that's all I got.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

And just listening to yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Listening to yourself in those times. Sometimes I push myself. So I'm like, I surprise myself. I'm like, okay, I made myself go do the thing and I'm really glad that I did because I had a great time. And other times I'm like, in here is telling me no. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

And I think the barrier would

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

is like, me too.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

The barrier would be easier as a female if we didn't have to do our hair and makeup. I feel like if I could just roll out of bed and throw on an outfit, I You may, you may have a better success rate, but like the whole having, like, I see my husband and takes him like five minutes to get ready. It's like a shirt, pants and some cologne. And I'm like, Sir, like, I need like a full hour and a half to like,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Right. And then they're sitting here like snapping or like impatient

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

you imagine?

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

you 10 minutes. It takes me an hour and a

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

And I laid out your shirt. So I, that was half

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Stay home.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

thinking of getting ready and the getting ready is feeling like a task. That's, that's how, you know, it's like, this is going to feel like a project to me right now. I'm not going. Oh Yeah. I'm not going. I went on a date last night and he showed up looking like he rolled into bed with crust in his eyes, had like patchy little patches of hair all over his face because he hadn't shaved. Ungroomed. Un, yes. Untrained. And I'm just like,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

and he's like standing there like, wow, yeah. He's like, wow, you're like the prettiest girl I've ever talked to. I'm like, well, I would have been like, enjoyed being met with the same amount of care into how you presented yourself today. Yeah. Yeah.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yeah. Graced you with

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

He came in cut off jorts, girl.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Not the

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Exactly! Yes! In the winter!

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

me. Did you leave early?

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Oh, I

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Okay. I love that. Please.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

I got my two glasses of sangria and I said, I gotta go home.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

it.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. But speaking of time, it kind of leads me into our next question. So something we talk about a lot on our podcast is having the luxury of time, resources and access as brown and black people. Why should self care be looked at as a necessity rather than a luxury? Mm

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

is, if you don't take care of yourself, nothing that comes from you is going to be good. You know, if you are pouring from a half empty cup, What exactly do you expect to achieve from that if you're not pouring into yourself? So self care I think is really about being extremely intentional about yourself mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically so that you can operate as your best self, whatever that is for that day. And it requires being a little selfish. I know people hate to hear that word, but you have to be selfish with yourself because if you're not selfish with you, you're going to sacrifice yourself and which is actually worse. So I think it's very important to carve out those moments of time. It doesn't have to be this big thing. Like I say all the time, self care doesn't have to be the rose petals and the bubble baths and the candles. And it's like it's finding those small moments in those pockets within your day To really just kind of tap in with with yourself. Like how am I today? You know, I always talk about my Issa Rae moments in the bathroom like in the mornings like saying my affirmations Like you're a bad girl today. You got it. You're gonna say it's gonna be a great day. You're killing it This is great. Like you have to do you have to hype yourself up. You have to be your biggest hype person Um So, like, self care is not something to be played with, and again, it's gotten extremely commercialized lately, but it goes so much, so much deeper than that. And I think once we've realized that we're able to make it more of a priority for ourselves.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Right. Yes, definitely. And knowing that if you don't make it a priority, nobody else is going to.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Mm hmm.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Exactly.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

have to set the tone. Mm

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

energy that you're, that you're allowing almost or that like you were meeting them with. So it's like, Oh, this person clearly, you know, is pouring from a half empty cup or they're not caring for themselves in a way that makes them whole. And they're trying to just sacrifice. To give me what I need. And then there are energy leeches that are gonna be like, Love that, love that, love that. And then at the end of the day, who's depleted? Them or you.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Mm hmm.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

So,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Especially as, especially as you begin to build and progress, like, people will, are watching you. You know, when you're trying to do good, when you're trying to do better, people will watch you and, and try and take that from you. And sometimes, sometimes it's intentional, sometimes it's not. But like, you have to be very guarded about your energy and, and your space. ha.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Okay. Lessons. Yeah. Okay. Universe. Yeah. I know. It's a, it's a constant conversation that we're having. It's very cyclical. We're always talking about as empaths, highly sensitive women of color, how to manage giving too much of yourself while still remaining your authentic self, right? We don't want to water ourselves down.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

no, for sure. One of my favorite features on iPhone now is that it tells you when a message has been delivered silently. So like you already know, I probably haven't seen the notification and that to me makes me feel a little bit better not responding to you

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yes.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I, that used to be a thing for me too. Like I have to respond to every message when it comes in, but no. My phone is on do not disturb. You're probably not going to hear from me. And even when I do read your message, I may not respond immediately either. So like, that's just random, but I love that feature.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, I added a new one because you can add a custom. So when I'm studying, I put my studying on. So I'm like, now you know exactly what I'm doing. So now you're definitely not

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

I didn't know you could do that.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, you can add a custom focus. Mm hmm. And it still is a version of Do Not Disturb. Yeah. Right. So add another one

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Right,

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Reaching out. Don't chat to me,

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Investor

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Exactly. Exactly. I know you're actually very creative. You just write in whatever you want. Oh. I don't know if it'll say, like, If you're just on Do Not Disturb, but it makes me feel good when I can turn on a specific one. I was gonna say, when I text you and you're on Do Not Disturb, it doesn't, it just says Dani is on Do Not Disturb. Okay, that's what I thought, like, notifications or silence type of thing. But I love choosing the specific ones. Okay. it. feels better for you. It does. It's a me thing, for sure. It's for me. That was like the best feature that Apple could have ever

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Love it.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Do Not Disturbs, yes. And it's everything. It's like, you don't want to hear anything. You Got you.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Yep.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah, absolutely. So before we let you go, we did want to kind of open up the mic, obviously so that you could share more information about I guess we touched on the launch a little bit. Maybe if you want to talk about some events that are surrounding that. If you have any like fun, like little party planning. I love a party. I love planning parties. We love parties. So things like that. Anything to celebrate, like I'm going. So surrounding the launch of SILKENN and I guess around that time where it will be available to

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Mhm. Okay. So we have a lot of activations happening. We're actually kicking off our we have been working on building on our social media team. So we will officially be on all social media platforms as of January, which is extremely exciting. So follow us on social media. We'll be utilizing our broadcast channel as our group chat. So you definitely want to tap into our broadcast channel. We'll be having biweekly activations in a single day. Maybe we're starting off in New York and L. A. as our main cities. And then we're going to kind of listen to the girlies and see where they want us next. So we have a lot of pop ups and stuff planned, a lot of activation, some spa days, testing out the products and behind the scenes, a lot of fun things. So make sure that you're tuned into the broadcast channel on our Instagram page. And yeah, we'll be launching DTC on our website. And again, a lot of pop ups, a lot of fun things to do. So yeah, at SILKENN Co on Instagram and all social media platforms and then SILKENNco. com and that's SILKENN with two N's.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Correct. Yes, all that will be linked in the show notes, of course Yeah easy to click easy to find easy to follow and as an aside if you could just like help your girls out because we want To support you if you well, you said you are coming to LA let us know and we'll try to make it out Yes, we're very close. Yeah, just a drive away

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

we love that.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Yeah. Yeah. Thanks so much for coming on the podcast, Ericka. We loved all these little nuggets that we learned and we hope that our feelers can connect and also support another Black owned brand. Yes, ma'am.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Thank you for having me. Thank you for sharing your platform. We need more of these conversations and you guys are killing the game right now. So

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

Thank you. so are you.

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

thank you.

empaths-anon_3_11-18-2024_153415:

I know. We reached out cause we were like, we were looking for people to like collaborate with in the podcast space. We found your platform. We're like, oh my gosh, I love her podcast. We love like what you're doing. So it's fun to like partner with other people. micro influencers in that in that kind of space to be able to have these conversations because like you said They're not always had there's like less than 14 of us In the podcast landscape, so I love being able to open up the mic for more of us

ericka-nicole_1_11-18-2024_183415:

Thank you.

ea_3_01-07-2025_152401:

Well, y'all, we hope you enjoyed that conversation. We are so thrilled and happy to have had Ericka on and we appreciate her time. I really love the shift in perspective from balance to, I lost it. What was the phrase? Trade off. Trade off. Thank you. Thank you. Jesus. I was going to say shift, shifting. What the fuck? From balance to shifting. From balance. From. the idea of balancing things, which we all decided that doesn't really exist. It's not as realistic as we all think it is. Because balance is so vague. Right. What is balance? What does it actually look like? So I like trade off because that's tangible. I know I could take one thing and trade it for another thing. It's like bartering your time with yourself, almost. Yeah. So I really like that she was upfront and honest about it and we are so thrilled to see her journey. Obviously we're going to go to the L. A. event when, when SILKENN Skincare launches and we're skincare gruelies up in this house. We're so excited. You should see my skin. I have all my ordinary things lined up. I got the Marula oil from Trader Joe's and so I'm trying that out. It's supposed to be the drunk elephant dupe. Okay. I will report back to you in February about that as well. Yes. But I will, I would love to be able to trade some of my skincare for some of Ericka's line when it comes out. That's really exciting. Yes. I also just really loved her vibe. Mm hmm. She has this very, like, confident optimism. We forgot to tell her while she was on. What? But she shares, does she share a birthday with Coco, or is it the first? I think, no, it's the second. It was the second, right? She has the same Coco and Fernando. I'm 99 percent sure it's the second. Yeah. We forgot to tell her that she shares the same birthday week as my daughter. And of course, our one true love, Fernando Tatis Jr., who actually shares the exact same birthday. as my daughter. So I'm, I'm pretty sure they're all in the second, but I could be wrong. So I don't want to, I don't want to give wrong facts here. You know, we do love a Capricorn here. Listen, if one thing we're going to do is we're going to haul in the earth signs. Okay. We have been noticing like the more that we reach out, the more we get reached out to, it's like we're attracting like a very specific signs to the pod. A lot of Sag, a lot of Capricorn, Scorpios. I feel like a couple of times we've had a Scorpio on here. Yes. Yeah, one of our guests for next week is a Gemini and I'm so obsessed with her podcast. I'm so excited for you guys to listen to that one. Yeah, it's a surprise. Yeah. But yeah, we were so thrilled to have that conversation with her and we appreciate her so very much for coming on. Yeah. Yeah. I really love. Just her authenticity and her reason behind starting a skincare line. Like we kind of mentioned on the podcast, a lot of people see it as like a money grab. And I think that she really created this line to solve problems for people with. Black and brown skin. So, so excited about that. Amen. Amen. Let us know what you guys think. If you are local to the Southern California area, we will, of course, keep you updated as things start to launch. We're going to share all that stuff as it starts to happen on social media. And of course, as always, everything will be linked in the show notes. Please go check out her podcast. Yeah. Share this episode with a skincare baddie. And yeah, let us know how you're January reset is going in February. We'll continue the conversation. Yeah, see where we're all at. And we'll see you next month for Black History Month. We'll see you next month. Hell fucking yeah, bitch. Bye.