Hey doc, I am very excited because it is the one year anniversary of Dr. Toya coaching. So this is a celebration episode and I just, I'm so excited. I am so honored to have been  A part of so many physician moms lives, I am honored that you come and listen to me ramble on every week on this podcast because it's all in service of you and helping you achieve that dream life, whatever that dream life means to you.

More time with your kids, more time away from your kids, more time enjoying your job. time finding a new job, whatever it is.  And I want to take it back a bit and talk about where I was about a year ago when I started what is now Dr. Toya coaching,  you know, I had my postpartum burnout experience.  I took a step back from everything in my healing, found perinatal mental health, found the gaps between the kind of postpartum care we give as OBGYNs and the kind of holistic care and community that I needed and that many don't have access to. So  I started This coaching program, but it's a little bit more involved than that. 

So it was a medical program. The name of it was Beyond the Fourth Trimester because at that point  my context was postpartum and this idea that many people believe once you hit that three month mark, you are no longer postpartum. Because that's when you go back to work, that's when you're expected to into society.

That's when, you know, all sorts of made up things. When medically,  postpartum lasts for a year. It is the definition of the postpartum period. It's one year after the birth or after the pregnancy has ended. Even if it didn't end with a live birth. And the reason that that is important is because You still have changes to deal with, you still have, let's say, repercussions from this major event a year after, and really beyond.

Right, so that's why I named it Beyond the Fourth Trimester because, especially at that time, there was a huge obsurgence of fourth trimester care and the importance of the fourth trimester, which is very important, which there should have been. But it stopped there. And what I found too was a lot of that movement was coming from pediatricians, right?

They were the loudest voices, and then of course the non medical community. And I felt very passionate about the fact that OBGYNs had to be involved, and then it had to be in this kind of holistic way. Because when you believe that you are supposed to quote unquote snap back by three months or whatever or at all, You begin to think that if you don't, something is wrong with me, right?

The comparison to other people who are up and doing this at four months and they have a six pack and all of those things can be really damaging, right? Especially when.  mentally, physically, there are still changes happening. There's still healing to be done. Your pelvic floor is not done. It doesn't magically snap back at three months postpartum.

 There's even a study in last year's MOC about The length of time that it took for certain things to heal and the pelvic floor was one of them. The rates of postpartum depression And the rates of maternal suicide are the highest at like nine months postpartum.

So all of those things were the driving forces behind me creating this program to not just focus on that fourth trimester, which was super important, but to really. I wanted to shine some light on this forgotten period and make sure that, physician moms had the support that they needed throughout that year.

I wanted it to be a group program because of the value of community. I talk a lot about it needing to be a village to not just raise the children, but to support mom, right? There was a significant phenomenon that happens.

You have all of this help, all of this support, hopefully,  in the immediate postpartum period, or even for those first three months. And then everybody goes back to their lives as well. And it's not necessarily a bad thing, it's a factor of the society we live in, in capitalism, like people have to go back to work, they have their own lives. 

But there's also a little bit of socialization with that. There are a lot of people who don't think they need the help past that point, or people who think, well, you should be able to figure it out on your own,  right? So normalizing the fact that you will need help past the fourth trimester, that you do need all of the hands, you do need all of the support,  and you do need your village beyond the fourth trimester. 

All of those things were part of the vision that I had for this group program. Thank you.  And when I launched,  I was going hot, telling everybody about it, and  I texted an older friend from medical school,  and she was immediately interested,  but she was like, oh wait, my kid is 18 months, can I still join?

And I was like, no. Yeah, of course, come on. And  my business coach, Dr. Una, shout out to Dr. Una as usual,  was like, well, you know, yes, people want community. But you could also just do private coaching, which had not dawned on me because, as you know, from my story of going from OBGYN to coach, it was a lot of resistance, even getting to the fact that I was going to do coaching, right?

This was supposed to be a medical program.  And then  it came to my senses and I realized that there was really no medicine that was being practiced, so it's just gonna be a group coaching program. So now I was like, oh, I'm gonna do private coaching, like solo one-on-one.  What is this  the best decision, the best coaching I've ever had? 

The best,  because it is what evolved this group medical program idea into  the amazing, transformational.  one on one, intimate, personalized experience that  is Dr. Toya coaching

 and once I Started the one on one  and my first client was Somebody who had an 18 month old that's when I realized there was no reason to limit to Postpartum at all  the issues that You face postpartum, the resentment of the husband, the overwhelm, the sleep deprivation, the transition to work,  all those things extend on.

If Your husband wasn't helping in the beginning, they don't suddenly start helping. Yes, it becomes a little bit easier when the baby isn't so attached to you, but those things become foundational and they continue to be  themes over the next couple of years.  So it not only evolved from a group coaching program to One on one coaching program.

It evolved from this thing that was very focused on postpartum  to  the early years with the idea that  all of this is the foundation for your motherhood experience moving on and if you can set your boundaries and Set up a life that you can actually thrive in and you're not you don't feel like you're drowning in now You  It's, it's going to be even better later on,

 It seems like the most radical time to be making these stands, but I truly believe that this is the time.  You don't want to get to when your kids are grown  and then be like, Oh, I'm not ready.  Why do I feel like this? Why do I feel like everybody is depending on me and I have to hold everybody up?

Everybody's turning to me and I expected to drop everything at the drop of a hat when somebody has an emergency. Why do I feel like this mental load of having to coordinate everybody's lives before my own? Like, why do I feel this way? And I'm, I'm tired.  That doesn't magically change once the kids get older.

 But if you set  Your foundation nice and strong right now,  during these early years,  when they are the most dependent on you, where you can still be true to your values, the type of mom that you want to be, but also the type of human that you want to be. How do you want to feel,  

what kind of physician do you want to be? All of those things, setting them up in this early time is the best time. And that is such a beautiful evolution. of this idea that I had to serve physician moms during this time.  And I feel like I am walking in my purpose. OB G. YN. was great. I am  excellent physician,  excellent OBGYN. I get reminded of that daily because I have so many non excellent people to compare myself to.

I'm kidding. Not really. But that was one season of excellence. A little bit of genius. This feels so right. This is the zone of genius and I couldn't have gotten here without all of it, without the OB, without the burnout times three, without the entrepreneurship, without just the person that I am, how I was raised.

All of that makes this feel so right and the most natural next step. So I am so grateful that I can see that Dr. Toyo coaching is one year old today and I am so proud to have. Made an impact in physician's mom's lives. I'm so proud to say that I have launched a podcast that people actually are listening to.

It's still like a shock. Every time I get my Buzzsprout thing, it's just like, Oh my gosh, people are actually downloading and listening to this. It just, it feels so right. And I'm so grateful and I'm so excited to celebrate this milestone. And I want to end this episode with something that I wrote. 

Dr. Una, had us write down  why we must. So the prompt was, why I must,  and the idea was writing down the reasons why you must provide this service, why you must have this business. 

Why must Dr. Toyo coaching exist and grow and thrive? It's because of you.  It's because  I don't want other physician moms. To have to dream and wish and hope that they would get Rear ended on the way to clinic because they hate their job so much  because that was my experience I don't want another physician mom to See their little three month old that they love that is a part of them. 

Peace of their heart  See their four year old The family that they have, the life that they built, and just want to walk away from it all  because they are so angry, so resentful, so burnt out  because I had to deal with that. And I know that I don't want that for anyone else. That's why I must, I must continue Dr.

Toya coaching  because there are so many physician moms who  don't know that this type of support exists. They are overwhelmed. They are burnt out.  And. Socialized to believe that it's them,  that they are the problem because they are supposed to be able to deal with it all. They are supposed to take on all of the unseen and unpaid labor  because that's what moms do. And I can help them come up for air,  not feel like they are drowning and just reclaim their lives.  I must continue Dr. Toya coaching because no one else has my voice, my unique perspective and my experiences. So I can relate deeply and personally to what  other physician moms are going through and I have made it to the other side.

I can show you the way  and I can show you your way. I must continue Dr. Toya coaching because So many physician moms and women physicians in general do not ask for what they want. They don't know how to, they socialize not to, they are scared to, they're told they cannot.  And I truly believe asking is your superpower and it surely is mine.

And I can help you ask and get what you want 

I must continue Dr. Toya coaching because Women physicians are burning out because they do not have the time and energy to even think about what their desires are, far less to connect to them so that they can go in the direction of their dream lives. 

 Coaching physician moms in the early years of motherhood  so they can thrive in medicine and motherhood without sacrificing themselves.   This is why I am celebrating Dr. Toyo coaching this year and I will be celebrating many years to come.  I cannot wait to see how it will evolve because as with most entrepreneurs, I have a million other ideas. 

All surrounding women physicians, you know, always have a place in my heart. Everything that I have in this massive vision. This  is focused on making our lives as physician moms easier, happier, healthier,  just everything that we want and desire because we deserve it. You deserve it,  right doc? So celebrate with me.  If this podcast, if my message, anything has touched your life in the last year, let me know about it.

I want you to celebrate with me. I want to spread these messages near and far to every physician mom, and I want to end with gratitude for coming back every week and listening,  for sharing, for leaving reviews, for all the things.  I really do not take it lightly and  I can't wait to continue doing this work because I must.  See you on the next episode of Stethoscopes and Strollers.